I knew starting at birth was a bad idea. Being completely unable to care for oneself is not good on the dignity. It doesn't help that my Uzumaki red hair has combined with my Kaguya white hair to result in pink hair.

Still, it is helpful in some ways, too. It gives me some time to learn the language, and keeps people from being willing to hurt me right away.

And that is an issue because people fucking hate me. Or maybe they are scared of me. I can see it in the way they look at me. I don't understand what they are saying right away, so I can't say for sure why, but they do say the work "Kaguya" a lot when talking about me.

Whatever. I better get started getting strong enough to survive this world. I'm not going to be training my body at less than one year old, but I can at least train my less obvious skills.

I practice honing my ability to sense chakra. This is especially easy for me, because chakra is a new thing for me. The people native to this universe have had this stuff their whole lives, but I notice it right away thanks to the fact that it is new for me.

I also start practicing channeling the chakra to different parts of my body and seeing what it does. I can use it to get a boost to my sense of smell, hearing, or sight. I can even channel it to my brain, boosting how fast I think. It was awesome to watch a buzzing fly slow to a crawl through the air once I figured this out. I make sure not to do it for too long, though. I don't know if it might over-heat my brain or something.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

At three, I am taken to a hospital. Just a routine thing; nothing wrong.

But while I am there, I hear a doctor arguing with another one about me. I keep my senses boosted pretty much all the time, which is why I was able to hear them from another room.

The one doctor apparently doesn't think their Hippocratic oath should be extended to me because I am a Kaguya. I'm not even named Kaguya; my pregnant Kaguya mother showed up at the village a couple of weeks after the Kyuubi attack claiming that the father was an Uzumaki and she wanted the child to be raised in a village more friendly than Kirigakure. When she gave birth, tests were run to see that I was actually Uzumaki before she left me in the orphanage and then returned to Kiri.

I don't understand why that is such a big deal to everyone. I've never even used the Kaguya bloodline gift in an obvious way. I've decided to copy a fanfiction I read once in how I used this bloodline. That story basically had the Dead-Bone Pulse turn Naruto into Wolverine. My bones are now practically indestructible, and I have some retractile bone claws that are shaped like Wolverine's adamantium claws. Beyond that, I just heal at a ridiculous rate.

Still, I'm clearly not a normal child. I never cry. This has not exactly set people's minds at ease. I can almost understand why they might be afraid of me. But you'd think a pink haired three-year-old wouldn't be scary enough for this kind of reaction.

The doctor enters my room and I can smell the fear on him. I can also smell the poison in the syringe he's carrying.

I suppose I have two choices now. I can let him inject me with that and trust my healing factor to carry me through it, or I can stop him.

When he gets close enough to me, I swing my arm at him and extend my claws.

As he is on the ground, holding his throat as his blood pours out of him, I take a moment to look at him. This is the first time I've ever killed someone. I would have thought I'd feel worse about it. Maybe I'm in shock? Or maybe my Kaguya heritage is showing up now. Still, I don't feel any need to hunt down my enemies and murder them, so I'm not too worried.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

They kicked me out of the orphanage after I killed the doctor. The Anbu found the poison, so I am not in legal trouble, but the orphanage used it as the excuse they needed to justify not keeping me.

I suppose the typical thing to do here in a Naruto fanfic is the live on the streets, but that's not where I go. I go to the woods.

I watched a lot of YouTube videos about how to survive in the wilderness in my last life. That, plus my superhuman senses, bone-claws, and ability to channel chakra to my muscles for a boost in ability, sees me through surviving off the fat of the land.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The Hokage is kind of an asshole.

I've been living in the forest for two years now, and he's never once tried to help me. But as soon as someone reports to him that I've been using shadow clones, he brings me in to question me about it.

I explain it away as having seen an Anbu with grey spiky hair do it and just did what he did.

"But how did you know how to mold your chakra to get the jutsu to work?" asked the Hokage? He seems to be trying to find a balance between talking to me like a child and getting answers.

"I just did what he did," I explain. It takes a little bit for it to sink in to the Hokage that I can sense chakra.

When that gets taken care of, the Hokage decides to put me up in an apartment right next door to Naruto's. I don't know if that is so he can keep an eye on me more easily, since he is already monitoring Naruto, or if he feels guilty for letting me sleep outside for two years so he's putting me next to my only family.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

You'd think that, as an adult, I could just blitz my way through the academy, but there is a problem with that. I can't read this language.

Luckily, that isn't an uncommon problem for five-year-olds so the first few weeks in the academy are dedicated to teaching reading, writing, and basic math.

Mean while, my training is continuing. Shadow clones are pretty much constantly training everything I know how to do. I've got clones practicing sticking to stuff, walking on water, and enhancing my senses. I'm also figuring out how to make chakra threads (who wouldn't want what amounts to telekinesis?) and chakra chains. To make this more effective, I've stolen an idea from fanfiction by figuring out how to just half do the shadow clone technique. This sends the memories from me, or my clones, out to the other clones and me without having to make a clone and dispel it. The training clones are constantly updating each other and me with their progress.

Also, I'm stealing another idea from fanfiction. That story pointed out that it should be possible for someone to make a bunch of shadow clones at night just before going to bed. While they sleep, they regain the chakra they spent on the clones while the clones meditate or clean or whatever, then, in the morning, the clones dispel, sending their chakra back to the, now-full, chacra coils of the original, stretching them out the same way Kisami's sword stretches his coils.

And it works. This is why I spend so much effort training chakra control despite having bought perfect control for this life. Because, by the time I'm an adult, I'll have the chakra capacity of a bijuu.

And once I get able to read and write, I start the cliche library raiding. There is nothing in there about advanced jutsu or anything, but the most basic stuff is there. My practice is to pick up a stack of ten books every day, choosing the books that seem most useful, and make a shadow clone. That clone will have copies of the books and will head back to my apartment. Once there, one clone for each book will read a book, send the memories of the book to the others, meditate for an hour, read the book again, send the memories out, meditate for an hour, then copy the book by hand to a series of notebooks.

This both rapidly improves my reading ability and helps to practice my hand-writing skills, which will be helpful when I start working on sealing.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

I graduate at seven years old. Naruto is a little jealous, but he doesn't hold it against me. Which is nice, since he is the only friendly face to me in this village.

My teammates are assholes, of course. I knew they would be because of the drawbacks I took. Still, we pass the secret genin exam, since our teacher isn't Kakashi and is therefor not so focused on teamwork. He just tested our abilities and, when none of us were obviously too weak to be genin, he passed us.

Whatever, I'm still training myself anyway. I'm getting started on sealing now, actually. Shadow clones, once again, prove they are the best jutsu when I can use them to practice seals without risk of accidentally killing myself, which is what usually makes people not want to learn seals.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The chunnin exams are next month.

I'm nine years old and my team-mates are still assholes. They resent having someone on their team so much younger than they are, and they've never let me forget that. Still, I can kick both of their asses at the same time without much effort, so they've never really tried to bully me.

Sensei, meanwhile, just doesn't care about any of us. He does the bare minimum for us that he can get away with before leaving to go drink and hit on ladies. How did this guy get jounin? He never even trains and is weak as fuck.

Whatever. I've advanced my sealing ability that I've come up with a set of seals I want to put on my body.

They constantly monitor my health, keeping track of everything from my heart rate, to injuries to, my dietary needs. They can display this information to me in a genjutsu that appears as a holographic screen above my left arm like the omni-tools from Mass Effect. They will also alert me if something is seriously wrong, like if a poison was introduced to my system. They passively boost my regeneration even more than it already is. And they can impart resistance to my muscles, forcing my muscles to grow stronger.

But, most importantly, they can be altered by inputting what changes I want made into the illusory display screen on my arm. This will be useful when I think of new things I want my seals to be able to do and figure out how to make them do it.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

In my two years as a genin, I've saved as much money as I can. This is helped by my only ever buying stuff while under a henge; I'm not going to let them over charge me like they do Naruto.

Now, I have enough money to buy the apartment building Naruto and I live in from the owner. This is helped by the fact that he is constantly losing money because no one else wants to live here with us. Still, he tries to cheat me out of as much money as he can, so I have to spend everything I've saved to get the deed to the building.

Still, it is mine, now. I'm going to start saving up money again, because I intend to remodel the building to be the clan headquarters for the Uzumaki clan. Once I've got the money, I'll speak to the Hokage about what is required to set up the Uzumaki clan in Konoha officially.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The chunnin exams are held in Suna this year, which is probably the best for me. I knew it wouldn't be Konoha, but I was worried that it would be Kiri.

Still, Suna doesn't have Konoha's team-work mania, so none of the tasks require me to work with my team-mates.

The first task is an information gathering task that requires us to track down someone. I follow my nose and find him easily enough.

The second task requires us to each complete a puzzle with five parts. We each start with one fifth of the puzzle and we have to get the other parts from other competitors. This can be done with either diplomacy or interrogation.

I, instead, just hide and use my enhanced hearing to listen to others as they are getting the puzzle pieces from each other.

I get through the last task most easily, since it is straight combat. I do end up having to kill a couple of Kiri nin who come at me intending to kill me because of my Kaguya heritage.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The Hokage has agreed to let me restart the Uzumaki clan in Konoha, with me as clan head. I think even he knows that Naruto would not be good in the position.

I get Naruto set up in a hotel for a few weeks as the apartment building is converted into a clan compound.

I also put the body seals I've created on Naruto, since it will only help his development as a ninja. Some of the changes I've made to the design let me use it to communicate with him through them, and any changes I make to mine can be remotely copied over to his. The seals can also be used to store stuff, now.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Well, Naruto's genin exam is tomorrow, so I guess I've caught up to canon. I finish up the paper-work I've been doing for the clan, which is basically just village taxes at this point, and stretch my arms up over my head.

Leaving my office, I walk down the hall and jump over the stair railing down four floors to the ground floor. Walking across the entrance way and common room, I head into the kitchen to get started preparing breakfast for me and Naruto.

Once he is fed and sent off to his exam, I head to the middle of the building and get into the elevator I've built.

When I go to push the button for the floor I want, I push a seemingly blank area below the ground floor. The, formerly invisible, basement button lights up and the elevator starts heading down.

I travel downwards for nearly five minutes before the elevator emerges in a giant underground room, reminiscent of Urahara's training room from Bleach. In the large area in the middle, I have clones fighting with each other in a variety of styles and with a variety of weapons. The walls are honey-combed with rooms that have training facilities in them. One room has a bunch of clones sitting in a circle meditating on fire chakra while a clone in the middle practices fire techniques. This is repeated in other rooms for the other elements. Some rooms have books and scrolls for various subjects like medicine or sealing. Some rooms just have games that clones are playing so that I don't get too burnt-out.

Across the room, I see another elevator that leads to more basement levels below this one. Those levels are dedicated to various underground farms I've built and run with clones. The ceilings to these levels are generating artificial sunlight using seals, and can be made to rain to water the plants. I've got live stock that are controlled with mind-control seals that I put on their heads.

I grow everything from grains to fruits to textiles to vegetables to meat. Some of the food is kept in storage seals for the clan's use, but most is sold to bring income to the clan.

Starting tomorrow, I'm going to be sending clones out of the village to look for other Uzumaki. When I find them I'll bring them back to Konoha to be part of the clan here. I will hopefully be able to convince them to come willingly, but, if I can't, I've been able to reverse engineer some Yamanaka techniques enough that I can change their minds.