Game of Thrones Tales: Lannister Family Values
Summary: In an alternative universe, King Robert calls on a different old friend and brother to assist him. But whose decency, kindness, and sense of honor, while a bit different from Ned Stark's are equally strong. But are the family values of House Addams a match for the ruthless Lannisters?
Part XLVIX
"I commend you, Lord Belloq, on your so cleverly managing the outcome of today's Extremely Small Council meeting…" Lord Verysmuch smiled at his companion. "In spite of having the King name you as a likely conspirator in the recent plot against the Kingdom you arranged to be named to accompany the Lord Hand north on his upcoming trip."
"I'm Minister of Finance and Coin, my Lord." Smile, slight preening at the praise. "I needs must have knowledge of new sources of potential expense…And possible wealth, like the Lord Addams' coal notions."
"Vast wealth…From what I gather from the Hand's analysis."
"Perhaps…But I must be more reserved in my assessment. I mean, the things an enthusiast can do with statistics…A sober review is absolutely essential before the Kingdom makes any large-scale commitment which is why I'll travel on to the Vale to assess the potential for mining there as well while Lord Gomez proceeds to the Wall and surveys the Farther North." smile.
And perhaps "assess" Lady Arryn, that crazy love-besotted psycho murderess…? Verysmuch pondered, sidelong glance at his companion. I'd handle that freak with care, old frienemy.
"I suppose I should thank you for reminding the King we have so many other potential enemies and contenders for power, Verysmuch." Middlefinger noted as the two walked along the main hall of the Redder Keep, following the Council. Guards and attendants bowing as they passed. A few "little birds" and agents of each giving glances…
You're fired, moron…Belloq eyed one lady-in-waiting standing in conversion with an attendant who'd looked too shrewdly at him in nodding. I need good spies, not bad overactors trying to look like superspies in a play (and by the way don't miss the upcoming 'Mission: Not Possible VI', with infamous lover/courtier ruined knight by day and some nights; super spy/noble knight-errand by night Ser Ethan Hawkehand confronting a fiendish plot to destroy the Seven at the Kings'Landing Playhouse)."
"Mutual danger, Lord Belloq…" shrug. "But I still regard you, of course, as the prime threat to the kingdom." Arms folded in gold robes. ("Though thanks for the theater tip…")
"Thanks…" beam. Uh… "But not Danery Targaryen and her dragons?" shrewd look by Middlefinger.
"Whatever you mean to imply by that…" Verysmuch, pausing. "I would note she is rather busy in Barth as we both know and her dragons are as yet, tiny. She has no army and little following. It's even said by some sources that she is prisoner to the new ruler of Barth, following a coup there. I prefer to focus on threats closer to, or within, our shores."
And hope the simple-minded bimbo doesn't get herself killed…And her dragons become the pawns of yet another player, say Taro Trumpo Don, for instance. I really must get that Ser Jonah off his depressed, downbeaten ass and doing something. I don't pay simply to read grim doom-laden tracts of woe…
"There is always Tywin Lannister…" Middlefinger noted, a bit solemnly as befitting a loyal minister concerned only with the Kingdom's good…
Verysmuch eyeing his innocently concerned look…
Oh come…I've played that one endlessly…You think you're gonna fool me. Don't insult my lack of key genital parts encouraged, superior intellect.
"Lord Lannister has no need to seize the Kingdom. He practically is the Kingdom and much prefers to remain a power behind the Iron Throne. Most sensible of him, his only deficiency being his failure to consider the danger of underestimating some of his potential and real opponents…"
"He didn't underestimate Lord Raining of Castamere." Smile.
"But Raining openly rebelled and invaded his territory. No, he requires an opponent have a large army and powerful House power base to be taken seriously." Verysmuch shrugged. "Practical and concretely Machiavellian of course, but one feels a lack of imagination and abstract thought there…"
"Still, that focus on the practical is the only reason we have not been found strangled or poisoned in our beds or been invited to a bloody wedding at Ser Walter Freyed's Triplets…" Middlefinger, sidelong glance.
"I never go to weddings anyway…" shrug. "Not that anyone invites me, even though I am a prominent and powerful official in the government. People don't even ask me to godfather their kids…The eunuch thing, you know." slight sigh. "But I dislike weddings in any case…Too public, too easy for someone to poison or otherwise assassinate. And they make me sad."
"I suppose they would…" Middlefinger nodded. "I am sorry, I understand it must be hard…Difficult." He corrected, apologetically. "Irrational prejudice is an awful thing, not to be tolerated, even if mass killing and treachery are."
"I do love children." Verysmuch shook head. (A degree of eehew, just in case, though I do sympathize…Middlefinger thought.) "And while I could try to adopt, alone as I am, and with my being a eunuch and my unsavory reputation, I'm not a good adoption candidate for Social Services."
"Well, you know…If you ever need a reference with them…Or perhaps a willing prostitute to marry?"
"That's most kind…I may try applying again, some day. When I retire and any child of mine would not be a pawn to dangerous schemes. Speaking of which…When the Hand goes North, it would be rather suspicious if anything 'happened' to him enroute." Careful regard.
"Dangerous times breed dangers…But of course we must as loyal servants to the Crown, do all we can to see Lord Addams remains safe." Smile.
"My friend…While I don't mean to offend you, should anything happen to Lord Addams, I would of course have to see to it that my innocence is fully established as well as helping the King to bring the culprit to justice."
"I could have no greater wish myself, my friend…"
Ok, our brief alliance of necessity will not endure past anything that endangers my Lord Verysmuch or his own schemes, I get it and expected it, stands to scheming reason, no prob, Middlefinger thought.
Nice of him to alert me though…He's always considerate that way.
Anyway I don't want Addams dead till he's up at the Wall where so many accidents and incidents can happen…Throwing no suspicion, or at least limiting it.
….
The Tully-Cicero/Frump border with House Lannister…
At the carriage of Lady Maud Addams…
"Is it really her in there?" one Lannister knight asked an Addams guard who nodded. "Lady Warthog, the Slayer Queen herself, back in the saddle, relatively speaking."
"Did she really kill two hundred knights single-handedly in one battle?" another eager young Lannister nephew…Thanks Gods I'm in this timeline and not the one where I get butchered after capture, asked, glancing at the carriage.
"Five hundred, I hear tell at the battle of Splattered Guts…Two hundred with a temple column she rolled down on them when they charged her position." an Addams knight replied in awed tones. "And then slept with six hundred of the prisoners during the peace talks and the exchanges. My granduncle was on the other side then…Told me it was three days of bloody terror during the battle, five days of agony lying for dead on the field, and sixty days of…Paradise…" smile.
"Wait…Sixty days…Six hundred guys?" the eager young Lannister nephew questioner stared. "Are you shiteing me?"
"I can offer you two reliable sources besides Granduncle Lessthanmerriwell. 'Kingdom's Week' 'Talk of the Field: Lady Maud Addams "A Woman of Bloody and Other Affairs" Spring 274.' And 'The Westeros Journal of Bloodiest Battles, 'Three days at Splattered Guts' by Maester McCullough, Summer 286.'" The Addams guard, nodding with wave of hands.
What can I say, kid? This is one legend that's for real.
Kingdom's Week…That's a pretty valid one. The knight nodded solemnly. The assembled groups respectively coming to attention as Tywin emerged from the carriage, pausing as he stepped backward down, a tall Lannister knight immediately rushing over to provide cover from prying eyes and the many, very many would-be assassins as two body doubles took up positions nearby, trying to look casually commanding and icily intimidating without showing face.
"I think you're right, Maud." Tywin, standing on the last step, holding the carriage door open as Lady Maud leaned out to him. "Whoever they are, they're sure to try again. And we can expect both your boy and mine to be in danger…" sigh. "But, much as we may both hate to have to do it, they must be our spearhead rods for now, drawing the lightning. By the way, please thank Gomez for sending those designs to Tyrion, the rods have really made a difference in cutting down on lightning-induced fires at Casterly Rock and in Lannisterport. Of course…" pause, raising voice. "I was referring to Jamie being in danger…The Imp's an expendable piece."
Tywin…Maud shook head, waving him close.
"He'll be fine. He's the smartest fellow your House has ever produced." She kissed him on the cheek. "Just lets keep our eyes open and be ready to act in concert as we've agreed."
"Indeed." Tywin nodded.
"And you might stop underestimating that Targaryen girl. She may not be all that warrior queenish yet but if she has dragons…" Maud noted. "I'd've thought Johanna and I had taught you a little respect for women." Smile.
"Well, perhaps…" he shrugged. "But one devastating threat at a time, Maud."
"Probably best…" she nodded. "Just lets keep a eye on her, even if Gomez's firepowder should trump her little flying fellas. Air power is the wave of the future you know. By the way, we should have some rather interesting advances in that to show soon. The boys have been making use of their enforced retirement." Shrewd grin.
…
The Desert Seaport of Barth, now capital of the newly proclaimed Trumpoian Republic, Taro Trumpo Don, President and First Citizen for life.
Even if he lost the popular vote in the recent plebiscite. The Council electoral voted him in, just before their tragic demise at the hands of unknown assailants. Don't listen to the lying Athenian media and their lying claims…
The Dyad Institute, Barth Citadel…Formerly the Grimm Fortress of Howling Despair, designed to fit its name by the architect brothers Grimm.
A large room, lit only by a few oil lamps…
"Hello…Hey!" the slight figure of Danerys Targaryen in her Barthian Blue designer gown, gift of her would-be fiancée, captor… "Who's there?! And where are my dragons?!"
"Hey!" she peered in the dark… "I see you there…Sorta. Where are my dragons, my surviving Doofraki…And that depressed guy of mine, whatshisname, kinda cute if eehew old, and really depressed?"
A couple of lamps were suddenly lit at the site she'd been staring…A large wood slab desk with said lamps, behind which a chair was turned to face out a window, open to darkness.
The chair's upper section swiveled around and a figure in white stared at Danerys…
"You? Again?" she blinked.
No…Wait…The other girls weren't wearing eyepatches.
Cool stare…Well, one-eyed stare…From the seated figure…."Yes, you've met my sisters, I know. Princess Danerys, I am Rachel, of Duncan…Chief Executive Officer of the Dyad Institute and Citadel Network and we are going to come to terms."
