Game of Thrones Tales: Lannister Family Values

Summary: In an alternative universe, King Robert calls on a different old friend and brother to assist him. But whose decency, kindness, and sense of honor, while a bit different from Ned Stark's are equally strong. But are the family values of House Addams a match for the ruthless Lannisters?

Part LXXIV…

Casterly Rock…

Original "Battlestar Galactica Cylon base star theme as the usual dark flocks of ravens swarming in and out of the top floor communications center… Lightning issuing from dark clouds above…

Tywina Lannister in her robes, brushing blonde tresses back and adjusting spectacles, approaches the great desk of Tywin Lannister, kneeling on one knee on the rather comfortable kneeling stool thoughtfully provided…

Unc may insist on proper protocol, but he always shows concern for the staff, she thought…

Tywin in trademark black, Johanna's red scarf dramatically draped about shoulders, swings chair…

Damn, that boy of mine is a genius…This swivel thing is wonderful. Always makes for such a contained, dramatic opening without all the rising and waving or stalking about a room that can be so time-consuming…

"Speak…" he said, quiet tone of doom. "And hello, dear. Take a seat." Waving her to said seat. "Hope your day's going well."

"Just fine, Uncle. Sir, reports from Kings' Landing. Your son the new Acting Hand has sent out that investigative team to the Vale with King Robert's full approval."

"Excellent…" he rose. "Our first true strike at the Menace…Remember you didn't hear that from me, it's strictly an 'investigative mission'."

"Right, Uncle. A fine idea, though, if I may say."

"Indeed…A though 'investigation' of the incident with my rather loathsome, but still Lannister, son is just what is required now. We'll soon have Lady Arryn dead…To rights. And the Vale will remain firmly secured…(With that bitch and the freak boy dead or exiled, you betcha)…To the Kingdom."

"That's likely to disturb our common enemy, sir."

"Yes, I think it will ruffle a few feathers…" folding hands, grim look. "The King took to the idea without much need of persuasion?"

"He apparently thought very highly of it, as did the Queen, on its broaching by the Acting Hand in secret…Though of course after the new Acting Hand broached it to them, they discussed it alone under the tightest security."

"Uh-huh…You mean, in their royal bedroom." Eyeing her.

"Well, that seems to be their place of tightest security these days, my Lord Uncle." Slight nervous look… "I'm sure the Acting Hand made certain…"

"No, that's fine…" he put up a hand. "Though that drunken sot no doubt has blared the details out in public…"

Hmmn…Does he mean Tyrion or King Bob? Tywina puzzled. And given both have noticeably cut back…

"Though in this case, my fool son's one competence may be useful…And he was sent as a lightning rod…"Tywin, grimly. "Still…"

Brilliantly expanding on my and Lady Maud's scheme to mask a pre-emptive strike as an investigation…Oh, Tyrion…My wonder boy…

"It's nice to know the King and Queen are working together so closely…" desperately repressing smile.

Can't let it shine out too often, at least until the kingdom's secure and my boys are safely married...Or a reasonable facsimile thereof. Must maintain that macho cool to keep the rivals in check.

"But word of the mission did 'leak' out, eh?" he eyed Tywina, who sighed.

"Naturally…" he raised hand. "But, as I've said, in this case, it might be for the best…" arch look. "Our hidden enemy will not take a threat to his…Or her…" shrewd nod to Tywina's faint smile.

Unc may not be all "causey" but you know which leading noble supports women's rights in this Kingdom.

"…Hold on the Vale lightly, it's the strongest and most impregnable bastion in the Kingdom, positioned right on the edge of the Midland coal lands, essential if they're to control that resource. Not to mention an excellent base to strike from or to receive reinforcements from their forces and/or allies in Essos."

"It's a brilliant countermove, Uncle."

"Not entirely to my credit…" offhand shrug. "Lady Maud was first to suggest it, given Lady Arryn's clear instability. And my lubricious son had similar notions, though of the most obvious kind."

Seized on that like nobody's business, sharp as a tack is our boy, Johanna!

"But you really think the Menace has forces in Essos?"

"They must…Too many events there point to the same hand. We've noted the seizure of Doofraki lands suitable for coal deposits, the recent events in Barth…Speaking of which…" he eyed her.

"That is the second part of my report, my Lord. And there the news is less good, though unclear…"

"Has that girl married the self-appointed by slaughter fool of a Chancellor and would-be, no doubt, Emperor yet? I suppose he's rejected the King's secret offer of alliance in exchange for her and her dragons?"

"Not as yet to either, my Lord. But she remains in his hands and we, your diplomatic and strategic team, fear it may happen soon."

"Yes, clever as the notion was… (And on that one both I and Bob B must share credit, my son-in-law truly is developing his strategic sensibility) the alliance was always a long shot and the marriage would be a sensible move for TTD and for the girl, given neither have all that much hand in the Game separately. But I'm equally disturbed about the natural philosophic developments in Barth, based on a new report I received from certain sources."

Our Tyr swings and hits again, Jo! He had Barth pegged as a technological danger zone six months ago. Not even our remarkable Lord Addams caught that. Yes, it was so right to put him in charge of infrastructure here, with the need to keep tabs on global technologic developments.

Gods, I doubt Jamie can even spell technology.

"Yes, Uncle…I've read the report." Repressing smile. "It was very disturbing."

And we both know who wrote it…

"Yes, Barth seems poised on a number of technical breakthroughs in the natural philosophies…That Dyad Citadel is remarkable…Unfortunately those we've managed to place in there have nearly all…Nearly all…Been exposed."

"And factoring in the possibility that Danerys Targaryen's dragon air power is now or soon to be added to the pile…" Tywina shook head.

"Dragons…" Tywin rolled eyes. "Still, one can't deny the proofs before one. But it seems Lord Addams' firepowder should be a helpful counter…And he and the King's other ministers and maester staff have already begun working out defensive armor plating."

"Oh yes and Tyr…That report on Barthian tech… Indicates some trends in heat-resistant body armor they've made."

"Putting their own secret weapons out of jobs…" Tywin beamed. "That must be delighting Princess Danerys as she watches her stock drop. Pity she has no more well-to-do backers at hand there. Indeed, not even one…" slightest of supremely dry chuckles. Tywina coyly smiling.

"Nice to have the inside dope, isn't it, girl?" Tywin eyed her. "By the way, Niece. How goes the wedding plans and when does Porthrightly plan to ask for an interview?" arch look.

As the old dog wasn't proudly blabbing all over his lands, Lannisterport, Lannistershire about his brilliant and beautiful young fiancée…

And not without reason…He proudly eyed his favorite niece.

"Soon, my Lord. We thought we should get to know each other a little. Meaning no disrespect, he'd only broached the subject with me recently." At my urging…Though he didn't think he'd stood a real chance with me, my modest Porth bear. "Naturally, we'd only act on this with your approval, Uncle." Tywina, nervously.

"That's fine and good…And the match is excellent, powerwise…But Tywina?" cocking head at her. "He is a bit older and perhaps not as intellectually agile as you…" earnest look. "You are sure about this?"

"More sure every day, Uncle…If it please you. I researched him carefully, of course and I'd got to know him some working here at the Rock. He's a really fine man…Sharper than some might think and sharp enough to conceal it."

"Yes…A good fellow, Porthrightly, truly." tapping fingers. "But…Between us. You do like the fellow? He can make you happy?" reaching to take her hand as she sat. "You are like another daughter to me, dear."

"I know he can, Uncle. And I believe he would agree that I can, him." Smile. "Thank you. Uh…If this is between us?" she eyed him.

He leaned over for a quick peck on cheek and leaned back in chair. "Then you can tell him to get his portly bottom moving and set up that interview. He'll likely find a favorable answer."

"Oh, thank you, Uncle." She beamed. "And you may notice it's not quite so portly these days. I've got him exercising and on a better diet."

"Well, you make sure he sticks, if he's as fine as you seem to think…Well done, for the family power point of view, niece. And I hope for you both as well." Nod.

"I'm sure of it, Uncle. If I may continue…?" she resumed serious tone.

"Pray continue…And an excellent report, Lady Tywina." Nod to her slight blushing beam…

"Lord Addams and his party have reached the Midlands and are surveying the coal fields…He is secretly attempting to learn the identities of the minor lords and individuals who have been purchasing the lands, no doubt for our enemy."

"Excellent…See that he has every intel assist we can offer placed at his disposal. A truly fortunate day when Bob B turned to him…No offense to the dearly departed but it was no great loss when Ned Stark took that fatal chug of bad wine."

"It may be so…" nod.

Tywin turned in chair to pull a lever which pulled a rope which pulled up a large chart on the wall next to his desk… "Yes, the Midlands…Seems at least sixty-five percent of the lands most likely for coal have changed hands recently…Scattered ownership but clearly middlemen and beards for the Menace. The kingdom still faces a grave threat, even if the King and his Hands secure the Vale and we have avoided the civil war trap."

"Indeed, Uncle. As to the succession crisis, currently somewhat nipped in bud by the jumping up of Prince Tommen to the head of the line…"

"Yes, that idiot Stanislaw and his crazy religious fanatics getting worked up. When will that fool see he could have far more power as a benevolent royal uncle and prop of the Realm while avoiding the foppery and palaver of rule? Well…" he shrugged to her look. "Probably never…Though I'd hoped he'd have more sense."

"Yes, my Lord. Though his strange High Priestess…"

"'High Priestess'…" mocking tone. "Former 'actress', you mean." Sniff…

"Yes…Indeed…" slight grimace at the thought… Actress? How low can one sink? "But…"

"I know…She has 'powers'…They usually do. And while it may take a while to research it, there's usually a logical explanation behind them. Though now Rently's gone and got into the mix…" sigh.

"Yes, I'm afraid so…Though fortunately…" Tywina eyed him.

"Yes…He has a most sensible new wife as part of his new 'power base'. Dear Margeary, thank gods she retains her grandmother's sense and brains, as well as the same killer bod…And a warm heart, intent on doing what's best for the kingdom." Shrewd look to Tywina.

"One might almost think…Especially given my close association with Lady Oleanna…That she was working in my…Or rather, the Kingdom's…Interest rather than her father's…" arch look.

"Indeed, Uncle." Slightest smile to his shrewd beam.

Sigh…Now the whacko stuff…But it's my duty to make a full report…

"And there is one more bit…" she winced a bit.

"Yes? Speak up, dear girl."

"In the Far North…More disturbing reports of possible Walker activity…"

Sigh…Frown… "Seriously?"

"The reports are scattered but a number from reliable sources…Fairly reliable."

"Drunken, burnt-out ruined knights, rapers, and assorted flotsam and jetson of the kingdom. What from the Wall? The leadership there at least has some brains…"

"They take the reports seriously, according to our sources, my Lord."

Hmmn…Frown… "Their job and duty to, I suppose. But as yet, no captured Walker Dead, no army of the Dead spotted marching on the South with anything capable of smashing through said Wall?"

"Nothing on that scale, as yet."

"Then lets keep that on the back…Rumored but not substantiated…Burner…And focus on what's before us. Though, no criticism intended…Always good to keep the eyes open, even on the fringe stuff." He nodded.

The said Wall…

Where, in the office of the Knights Commander at the Black Keep, in the midst of rather unusually cheerful preparations for the upcoming official visit of the King's Hand, the said reports of Walker activity were at the same moment being discussed…

"I'd dismiss about 77% of this as rubbish…" Lord Monumental noted to his second-in-command, comrade, brother-in-arms, and so much more, Maester ("Secret" Prince) Aemon… Tossing a parchment on his desk table.

"Agreed…Especially the UFO reports…Ser is at it again. And I mean the ergot-laced emergency bread." Frown.

"But that leaves 23% which are harder to toss into the fire…And not merely because some are carved on stone by the dying…" Monumental noted, pondering, Aemon nodding as he leaned back on stool. Monumental kindly grabbing him back before he fell over.

"Indeed…Still, the idea of men and women rising from the dead shortly after being killed…And the women at least still being rather attractive in a kinky sort of way…" Aemon shrugged. Sniff… "I've no doubt some of the men were too…I can't believe the prejudice of some of our recruits…"

"Of course, we have the more trustworthy eyewitness reports on top of the better documented parchment and stone…" Monumental tapped the smaller stack of reports on parchment.

"Well, even the more trustworthy sometimes take a nip or two on duty…Come on, now…" Reproving look… "We've all done it. Tis fearful cold up here, especially out in the snow at night." Sipping mug of hot cider.

Nothing like mulled cider on a night like this…And the fire used to warm it once saved my life by destroying the whatever that tried to attack me in here. Though, as I'm blind, I'm hardly able to certify what the whatever was…Perhaps just some half-mad, desperate recruit seeking to steal a blank pass to slip into town for a night?

"All right…So knock off 10% more, at best…Still leaves 13%. And frankly, if even only 1% were true…" shaking head.

"Screwed, my love?" Aemon sighed.

"Screwed as monumentally as my name, dearest. Well, we can review these with the Lord Hand. Perhaps he can provide reinforcements. And, even if he can't, we do have the Wall at least."

"It's not like the Wall's never been scaled by amateur mountaineers for a lark." Aemon shaking head. Shrug. "Heck, remember that wild weekend back in 236? If two stoned Guardsmen could do it...?"

"Not quite the same as a Walker army but I get the point…" Monumental agreed, tapping ash from a large pipe. Likewise nice to have around to either start fires or if reports are right about the Walkers... "So, we should brace for the worst in due course."

"Pity these creatures, if they really exist, or our normal Wildthings raiders menace, couldn't be induced to make a probing attack whilst Lord Addams is here…" shrewd look from the Maester ("Secret" Prince) Aemon…

"Yes…But remember, my dearest…Lord Addams is no fool. A bunch of our boys in costume, staging an 'attack' is not likely to deceive him." Monumental shook head. "Much as Ser Allister loves the whole business…Of course…" eyeing his dear comrade.

"The Lord Hand has expressed a wish to go into the North Beyond the Wall…In spite of my urgings that it's not the safest course."

"Is that wise?" Aemon blinked. "Lord Addams has offered the closest thing to support we've had in years. Do we want to see him and company killed or worse to prove this weird stuff is for real?"

"We can send our best in a scouting party…" Monumental pondered. "Young Jon Snowed among others…And my Lord Addams is no slouch at fighting and will have his own crack guard team. So long as we keep him from trying to probe too far into the hellish if frozen wastelands and send along a few of our more useless sacrificial types for the scouts to throw to keep any Wildthings or truly weird shit busy while we rush the VIPs to safety, it should be fine. And quite enough of a convincer that the real Menace is up here, not some political nonsense in the cesspit South capital."

"Brilliant as always, my love…" Aemon beamed.