I thought it would be fun to do another chapter around a musical! Except I didn't really do that for more than five songs because our favorite sad boys had to have too many emotions. Enjoy!


"What're you guys working on?" Reese asked, glancing in Luca's room.

"Zayne and I are working on our art final and Scout is just hanging out."

"I'm graduating from middle school. My finals are already done. I'm going to school just because I'm a beautiful person and people want to see me." Reese gave Scout a fistbump, hoping his powers of being finished with middle school would transfer over to her through the fist bump. There was a reason there was a series called Middle School, The Worst Years of My Life.

"Are you listening to anything?"

"Of course! Today Zayne is going to be introduced to Dear Evan Hansen."

"Neato, I'm sleeping over at Addison's house tonight, but you boys have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"We can do so much stuff," Zayne said quietly, and Luca burst out laughing. When Reese was gone, Zayne turned to his friend.

"Is Addison the one who asked you out?"

"No, that was Charlotte."

"How'd she take your rejection?"

"She was upset, but I think she understood. I just hope she doesn't ask me out again in high school…"

"Why don't you like this chick? She's cute. Not my type but cute."

"Yeah. But she's not the right person for me. I don't know how to tell her that…"

"Yeah? You have your eye on some other person?"

"He's not going to tell you, Zayne. Reese and I have already tried and his brain short-circuited. Let's just turn on the musical." They'd gotten into a bit of a groove since Heathers, having listened to Hamilton, Be More Chill, and Beetlejuice. Now they'd finally made it to Dear Evan Hansen. Luca was radiating excitement.

"I didn't expect that the guitar would go so hard on the first song," Zayne commented.

"This musical is lovely," Luca agreed, "Lovely, but heartbreaking." As he and Zayne began to work on their final art project, Scout opened a sketchbook of his own and began to doodle.

"Wait, who's Connor?"

"Connor goes to school with Evan. He'll be important in a moment. And both of the moms are important. And Zoey."

"Why can't we just watch these musicals?"

"You get to experience them the way I did. Now shush up and listen to what most people think is the best song in the musical."

"Is it the best song in the musical?"

"No, but shush." Waving Through a Window started and Zayne fell silent, mystified. Zayne's hand trembled on his pencil as he outlined and listened to the first chords of brokenness this lovely but heartbreaking musical had to offer. The violins absolutely obliterated Zayne and he sat, holding his pencil, thinking about quieter, better times when his father used to come home and play the piano instead of yell until Zayne was cowering in the corner. And Scout was thinking of better times too, both knowing that Luca couldn't exactly understand the full weight of that brokenness, and couldn't understand being that kind of invisible when Luca was always so seen and so loved.

And then For Forever started and Zayne just felt worse. A quick word from Luca explained that this gentle guitar fantasy was just that, a fantasy. Evan didn't have that kind of friend, and for a long time, Zayne hadn't had anyone either. As the song picked up, Zayne couldn't help but wonder if the better times were better. His dad was a disaster now, but he had friends, he had someone who would notice if he was gone. Zayne was incredibly grateful that he had people who would notice if he was gone. Luca and Nova had been really good friends to him, and Scout at least was kind and acted like his friend, though they'd never really talked one on one. Zayne could actually believe that these relationships would last for forever.

Zayne was slapped in the face by Sincerely, Me. He was laughing for most of the song, but he had to admit that it was actually kind of uplifting if you got past all of the ridiculous lyrics.

The real problem started with Requiem. It was nearly impossible to tell if Scout had actually been listening to the musical before Requiem but he was listening now. Scout's face contorted into a frown and he closed his sketchbook. Zayne picked up on it faster than Luca.

"You okay, man?"

Now Luca looked up, "What's wrong, Scout?"

"Turn it off."

"But this is my favorite song," Luca protested.

"How could you like this sad crap?" Scout scowled.

"Hey, seriously, what's going on?"Luca seemed very worried now.

"I just don't want to listen to this song!" Scout was kind of bouncing on his feet, fists clenched. Zayne thought he was going to start swinging.

"You don't have to listen! But I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong-"

"You can't help me, Luca! You're never going to be able to help me because you're never going to be able to understand! Play your dumb sad musical, I'm getting some air." Scout shoved the window open like he was quite accustomed to doing so and clambered out onto the roof.

Luca stood there, mouth hanging open, staring at the window as If I Could Tell Her started to play.

"I'll go talk to him," Zayne said, waving away Luca's concern.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Better idea than you talking to him right now. I'll be back in a bit, don't worry about it." And with that, Zayne climbed out onto the roof, trying his hardest not to look down.

"Just warning you," Zayne said as he plopped down next to Scout, "I have a slight problem with heights and I might throw up."

"Then why are you out here?"

"Because I think we're friends and you seemed like you needed a friend right now."

"You sound like Luca," Scout snorted, clearly still frustrated with the younger teen.

"Oh gosh, you're right, sorry. Pretend I didn't say that. Just uh, tell me what's on your mind?"

"That song Luca was playing gets under my skin."

"Requiem?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I don't know! I guess… I guess it just feels so… Familiar."

"Sucky family?" Zayne guessed.

"Sucky family," Scout agreed, and they shared a dismal fist bump.

"I don't want to be some tragic ballad in a musical. It's not that easy, y'know? My entire identity isn't some line on a playbill."

"I didn't understand all the theatre lingo but I got it. Luca has this way of boiling down people's problems into this simple, fixable sauce."

"Sauce?"

"I was stuck on the boiling metaphor."

"You boil a lot of sauces, huh?" Scout teased.

"Shut up, I'm going to lose my sauce soon. I'm just trying to be nice, Scout. Ignore that I can't talk feelings. Feelings are complicated, and even songs about feelings being complicated can make those feelings seem oversimplified or understated. So sometimes it sucks when Luca thinks he gets you because of some sappy song. Is that it?"

Scout gaped at Zayne.

"That's exactly it. It's not his fault, but he doesn't get it."

"Do you want to talk about what Luca doesn't understand?"

Scout thought about Andrew, about all the times his family had hurt him by being themselves.

"No."

"Good, me neither. But I'll be around if that changes. Now I'm going to get off of this roof one way or another before I pass out. Are you coming?"

"I want to stay out here a bit longer." Scout had denied Zayne's offer to talk, but it soon became apparent that he was destined to have the bad family conversation. Fortunately, the weather was perfect for company.

Who do you think is hanging out to talk to Scout?