The class I have before lunch let out early so I head out to get a burger. I don't have the guys in that class which is the only reason I ended up by myself. But it's not like I can afford being late or missing another class, so I'm back with plenty of time. I had planned to meet the guys in the cafeteria but on my way over something catches my eye- or more someone.
Someone who never seems to fail to catch my eye. "Hey," I set my food down before sitting.
Tweek glances at me and then continues to eat. He brought his own lunch today. "Friends piss you off again?" he wonders, bored.
"Nah," I say. "Just wanted to eat with you." He's quiet. "You okay?" He nods but doesn't seem to be. "Want some fries?" I push them between us. Tweek doesn't respond, just takes some. I wonder what could've happened between this morning and now that has him like this. "How come you're eating outside?"
"It's nice out today," he says, simply. Now that he mentions it, it is a beautiful day. It's been so shitty lately but the sun's out and there's only a few clouds. The skies a bright blue. "Here." He hands me my coffee cup. It's empty, looks rinsed out even. I don't say anything though, just put it away.
Thump, thump, thump.
Stop it. I take a deep breath.
"Hey," Tweek says. "What's been up with coach?"
Lately coach has been harder on me in practice and workouts. He thinks I'm really gonna go for this but we haven't talked about it again. "He wants me to take on boxing," I take a bite of my burger. "He's crazy."
"I've thought about it," Tweek admits.
"Really?" I say. He nods. "I didn't think I was good enough for something like that."
"Well, you'd have to take it seriously, if you were gonna do it but you could," he says. "You said it before like you really didn't want to but now it seems like you're interested."
"Tsk, I don't really have any plans anyways. If I'm good at boxing-"
"But is it what you wanna do?"
I stop eating and glance at the bushes. "How should I know?"
"Hm, you are stupid."
"I'm young and you're an asshole."
"Whoa," Tweek chuckles. "What do you wanna do? Before you said you were taking a year off."
"When did I say that?"
"When we were talking to coach." I stare at him. "…The time we almost got caught?"
"Oh yeah, I was so thrown off I must've just been talking…" Tweek looks embarrassed. "I didn't think you were lying, I just didn't remember," I try to explain but he shoves my face away. "It's more like I don't know what I want to do but I don't wanna just do anything. I wanna wait until I figure it out. So, if that takes a year and I decide to go to school then I might. But boxing…" I shrug, "wasn't a factor before. But if I'm good and I can get paid to do it. That might be a good thing for right now…"
"Hm," Tweek hums. "You'd have to move."
"What about you?" I ask abruptly. "What are you doing after High school?"
"Leaving."
"And going where? To do what?"
"Anywhere else and doesn't fucking matter."
"What the hell is that? You lectured me and you don't even know yourself."
"Yeah, whatever. I know what I'm doing. Fuck you."
"That's cryptic and creepy, Tweek."
"I hate it here," he says. "I hate the people, the town, the air, the- the fucking ants. I wanna be somewhere else- Anywhere else. This place sucks," he rants. "I feel like I can't be happy here. So first I'm gonna leave, and then I can figure the rest out."
That still doesn't make any sense. I can tell it's not something he wants to talk about. I don't really know what to say. It's quiet. I don't think I'm helping his mood at all.
"How're your classes?" Tweek only looks at me. "Mine? Oh, they're fine. I mean, I'm passing. Most of my teachers are nice enough to not fail me as a senior," I tell him. I decide that I'll talk and if he really wanted me to leave, Tweek's not one to hide that. He'd tell me flat out to go away. "Except for Board. He hates me and I'm shit at science. I think he's trying to motivate me or something but he's got it all wrong. The problem's not motivation, I don't give a shit about a slip of paper reminding me I wasted all this time." He still doesn't say anything. Did I piss him off? He doesn't look angry. He's pissing me off. "Oh, yeah you get tutored, so not so good, huh?" Tweek shoots me a glare. "And by Butters so it had to have been bad. Is Butters even smart?" He grimaces at the name and I laugh.
"Fuck you, asshole. Some of us actually wanna do well too!" I laugh at his outburst. "I think I hate him the most. He's so annoying. Fuck."
"What's he tutoring you in?" I ask.
"Math," he says.
"Calc?"
"Mhm."
"We could study together. I'm not worried about how I'm doing but if I had someone to study with-"
"Would that even be worth it now? It's so late in the year. We're practically d-"
"That's not an excuse." The bell rings. Shit. He looks a little taken back. I didn't mean to cut him off like that but he did it first and he's starting to piss me off seriously. I take my things and stand. "Think about it," I tell him. This whole time has been okay but if he isn't gonna talk about what's wrong he can't have an attitude about it all lunch. Though, I did invite myself. Still… "But be direct with an answer when you decide. At least know why you don't want to." If he's getting tutored, wouldn't it be worth it? That's what I should've said.
"It wouldn't help anyways to study with you," he says, standing up too.
I'm actually pretty good at calculus. "I'm passing by myself at least." That is to say, I'm better than he is.
Tweek pushes my face away again and snatches the remainder of my milkshake. "Whatever." I was barely drinking it. I can't eat too much sweet stuff all at once. Hm, he can have it and think he's won… if it makes him feel any better.
Did I try to cheer him up and get pissed off instead?
I find the guys and I already know what's coming. "Where were you now?" Token asks, disinterested.
Before I can answer Ken responds, "He ate lunch with Tweek." I'm shocked, I don't say anything. I can't even ask how he knew. The way he said it- but then Kenny says, "I saw you guys when I went to the vending machine. Out back at the picnic tables."
"Oh… yeah… ha." But there's something about the way Kenny says this. There's something about the way he delivered it all together. If he knew where I was, why didn't he tell the guys already? Maybe I'm being paranoid. How would he have found out from this morning to now? And me eating with Tweek is not a big deal, we box every day. It's safe for someone who knows that to assume we're friends. And friends eating lunch together isn't strange.
"Anyway Jenna's parents are out for the weekend, bro. There's gonna be a sick party. We're going," Clyde says.
"Okay," I say. "Have fun."
He throws his arm around my neck and pulls me in. "And you're coming too!"
"Ugh, Clyde, no. You know how I feel about parties."
"We're gonna pregame!" he assures me.
I groan, trying to get his arm off. "C'mon, I don't wanna get in trouble again. I think my parents would actually kill me."
"Tell them you're sleeping over Token's then! C'mon, before we all have to leave, right?" He does his ugly ass puppy dog face and I agree just to make him stop. It doesn't work! I just don't like looking at it.
"Fine, asshole, I'll go."
He and Kenny cheer and he starts giving me a noogie. I sock him in the stomach and he goes down. Which turns out shit for me, since Ken and I have to carry him to History after.
