My mom keeps trying to talk to me more about... Well, you know. I've been successfully dodging her up until this point. It's been easy. We can only talk about it whenever everyone else is either gone or asleep which means morning or night which I can say I'm leaving for school or pretend to be asleep.

I know I'm an asshole or whatever but I don't want to talk about it yet. I've said all I had to say and she should respect that. How can I even talk about Tweek when we aren't together? Is it right for me to tell her if I'm the only one who knows he's gay? I have to know what I'm gonna tell her first. I don't have to tell her anything but I should still talk to her at least.

As for Tweek, I knew that when Coach said he'd be coming to open the gym for us now, we wouldn't be able to mess around in the gym anymore. I just don't understand how that didn't fully register at the time. It didn't fully register because here we are at the end of the week and we haven't done anything since we had sex on Friday.

I think I lasted a good minute. For a whole day, it hadn't even crossed my mind. And I attribute that to Tweek's bizarre behavior recently. I've been distracted… still by him, but in a different way. Then it donned on me after I got home from practice that he didn't catch a ride. I was too distracted to notice. I hardly remembered practice at all. Just that coach was being especially annoying and pushing me harder. He should focus that energy towards Tweek, who might want to do this and would actually be good at it.

After that I couldn't stop thinking about it. I want to do it again with him but I don't even know what to do with that. Tweek hasn't said anything and I don't wanna seem pushy. But he liked it, so he'd want to, right? Then again, isn't he the type to say something then? If he really wanted to again, he'd just do it.

We have to find a new place to do things and that's a problem too. He probably doesn't want to bother. Wouldn't this be the perfect opportunity to finally end this? He said he didn't know about his sexuality and he also said we were never exclusive, with no intention of becoming so. Maybe there was someone else. It's very possible there's been other people this whole time. How lame would I look coming up to him desperate when he's been fine?

To top everything off, I quit smoking too.

"And that was just the second quarter-"

"Fuck! I don't care! Why do you keep talking?" This must be the third time I've told this jackass to shut up. I've got enough going on without him being a fucking annoying prick.

"I'm talking about your best friend asshole!"

"And guess what?" I ask him. "I still don't give a shit. I know this is like, blowing your mind but I enjoy it when nobody's talking."

Somebody enters the store and we hush our bickering. They buy a pack of cigs and I stab myself in the eye. Not really but it might make me feel better if I did. "Oh," Stan says knowingly. "Clyde mentioned you were quitting. He specifically mentioned that it was serious this time."

"Well, look at you, Stan. You just know fucking everything, don't you?"

"You could just be my friend since all of our friends are friends and we've known each other our whole lives."

"I seriously," I take a deep breath in, "hate you," I exhale. "Maybe, on a really good day if you let me punch you in the face. Actually, you should just let me punch you in the face."

"…" Stan starts and then just chooses to walk away. Thank you. I can finally-

"Craig! We came to pick you up!" Clyde is suddenly leaning over the counter right in my face. It startles me but I'm used it by now, since I'm always zoned out. Toke and Kenny trail into the store behind him. They both greet me.

"How are you gonna pick me up if I drove here?"

"I'll ride with you and Kenny can ride with Toke," he says, blatantly. "C'mon, Craig, use your brain." Clyde taps my forehead. This might actually be a good idea.

"How is that you picking me up?" I ask. "I'm still working and I'm boxing today."

Clyde groans loudly and annoyingly. "You're no fun anymore!"

"Wasn't it you who was so sad about us leaving?" Kenny chimes in.

Now I groan. They're double teaming. "Why are you even still doing that?" Clyde says. "What's the point?"

"God forbid I have interests."

He rolls his eyes. "Okay, fine. But you're always working or boxing like it takes up all your time. I play football and see the guys more than you."

"Don't make me out to be an asshole, asshole. It's not like I'm doing it on purpose."

"Then hang out with us, just a little. You're shifts almost over and you can miss a day of boxing."

It's not like anything's gonna happen today worth showing up for. And it could take my mind off things to just relax with my friends. I sigh again, "Alright," I submit. "Let me finish and clock out." Clyde and Kenny cheer.

"Hey man, we're supposed to be closing today."

"Yeah," I say. "You got it though, right? Friends help friends, right?" I pat Stan on the shoulder. Clyde and Kenny agree in the background.

"They do."

"I would."

"Friends help friends."

"All the time."

"You got it, man."

Stan huffs and rolls his eyes. "Okay," he says. "I finally get it. You're actually an asshole. We're not friends. I'll stop being nice to you."

I laugh, "Aw, don't say that. Our friendship was finally blossoming!" I clock out.

Clyde and I get in my truck. It's almost awkward but we're best friends… It has been a while. The last time we hung out was when we went to the gym and we barely talked because we were working out. Besides that, I don't really know. I can't remember exactly.

"I've never even seen you box," he says. He's quiet. "That's kinda lame. You've seen most of my games." Guess we're having similar thoughts. But Clyde doesn't blame me. He's too good a guy but it's my fault.

"It's different, isn't it?" I never really thought about it. Boxing was never for show and I never thought I was any good.

He gasps, "We should come and watch you!"

I shrug. "We box like every day so you can come whenever you want, though it's not that interesting." Especially since coach is there every time now. It doesn't matter if they show up now. Tweek will enjoy being able to beat me up in front of my friends too. If I'm lucky I'll be able to keep up. Sounds like fun honestly. And I've been thinking recently of how to introduce Tweek to the guys. I think he'd like them.

We pull into Token's driveway. Toke and Ken are already parked and inside. "I don't think his parents are home," Clyde says as we walk in.

"Hey, we're gonna watch Craig box!" Clyde announces. "Isn't it weird none of us have?"

Token's in the kitchen, making a sandwich and Kenny's on the couch. "Yeah, you're right," Token says. "It's not like he competes though."

"There's nowhere for him to do that here anyways," Clyde says. "We're gonna go next week," he decides. "Are you gonna do it after you graduate?" he asks me.

I shrug. "Probably not."

He turns back to Token. "Then we gotta go to see. At least before he retires, right?"

"Oh, I'm so down for this," Kenny says, excitedly. I don't really want Kenny to meet Tweek because I know how fast he'll be able to tell but something makes me think he might already have caught on. The way he doesn't outright say it, makes me so uneasy. "I'm betting on Tweek, for sure," he says.

"No way," Clyde says. "Craig's bigger. He'd totally have the upper hand no matter what." Clyde holds his fist up to me and I bump it with my own, expressionless.

"Dude, twenty bucks!"

"Okay! What about you, Toke? Who are you betting on?"

Token shakes his head. "I wouldn't bet on any of you idiots."

"Aw, Token!"

I finally let out a laugh and head to the living room to sit with Kenny. Clyde follows and then Token with food. "Does sound interesting. Are you good?"

I shrug, "Apparently, to some degree."

"What about Tweek? Is he good?"

I hum. "We're pretty evenly matched. That being said, he is smaller than me so it's kinda impressive." He's pretty impressive.

"Cool," Token says. He turns the TV on.

"That's scary," Clyde says after a while. "Tweek was already scary the way he glares at everyone and never really talks. Knowing he can also kick my ass…" He shivers.

"You don't even know," I chuckle. Then a lightbulb. "Way different than when we were kids."

Clyde starts laughing while Token says, "Oh, my God, yeah."

"He was going to the office every other day for panic attacks back then," Kenny says. I don't know if he knows Tweek hung out with us at some point and that's really what we're talking about.

"He was so fucking annoying back then!" Clyde wheezes. "He was hilarious too though."

"Wow, he really changed a lot… He's like a different person. When did it even happen?" Token asks.

"He was like that when we start boxing in middle school already so…" I shrug. "I barely even remember it."

"God, I remember," Clyde says. "All the screaming and crying."

Kenny looks between us. "What?"

"Tweek hung out with us for a while in like… third grade or something. It wasn't long. Like a month or something."

"What happened?"

Token thinks. "I don't… remember… We got in trouble," he says. "Well, I'm sure it was Clyde and Craig and I just got in trouble too."

Clyde starts laughing again. "Since Craig and I didn't really like him, we would mess with him," he tells Ken. "It was good stuff, man."

"That's terrible, we did that too," Kenny laughs.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes!" He says. "Cartman told me about it when Tweek used to hang out with them. But that was probably worse than hanging out with you guys."

My stomach kind of feels gross. "I remember him getting picked up early one time because he was freaking out," I mention.

"Yeah," Clyde says. "That's why he wasn't allowed to hang out with us anymore." He starts laughing again. "Oh, man, that was the best one," he remanences. "You licked your hand and got him to hold it and he flipped."

Token disagrees. "That's not what happened."

"Yes, it is," Clyde insists. "You wouldn't know. Like we would've told you, Toke, you were always snitching."

"'Cause you assholes were always getting me in trouble. And Tweek was a germaphobe. He wouldn't eat at my birthday even when we got catering, he wouldn't go on playgrounds," Clyde raises his eyebrows expectantly. "Why would he hold Craig's hand, if he wouldn't even drink from a cup at my house."

Clyde shrugs, "I don't fucking know. Convincing him took a while but that made it even funnier when he actually did it. By then he probably didn't trust us much anyways. But I'm telling you that's what happened."

"Then he started crying and his mom had to come and she was soo pissed!" He laughs some more. "Ha, you were a bad kid, Craig." Huh… I don't remember this at all. Still, I doubt Tweek is holding it against me. It makes more since what he said earlier though. This is why I can't argue with him when he calls me stupid…

"Meeting him again will be fun," Kenny says. "I've never been able to approach him. Mostly because I hung out with those guys and I knew he probably really hated them."

"True," Clyde says.

I stare at them. I really hope these fuckers aren't planning on harassing him like before. I don't know how that would even go down- not good for sure. I think Tweek would stand his ground but I'd kick both their asses before anything else. I don't want to say that now though, I'm sure it'd be weird.

Geez, now I don't think they should meet.

"Yeah," Token says. "He's a lot tamer. He's kinda like Craig from middle school."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Grouchy and misunderstood," Kenny answers and they all start laughing. I eventually laugh a little too. It's true. My stupid depressed closeted self- Wait, that's me currently too.

"Whatever. Let's watch something."