Ahem… hello!

I was gonna come back with some super long spiel about what happened and where I was but I don't think it's really necessary. (Your best guess is probably right.) The important thing is I'm back and part of the reason I was gone so long this time was I didn't want to return until I knew I would not be disappearing again. So, with that, I'm happy to say I will be posting weekly now, on Wednesdays and I hope you will be joining and reading and enjoying.

I cannot thank you enough, especially those who have been here from the beginning, but really truly thank you for your continued support. I do this 'cause it's fun but y'all make it fulfilling.

Alright, without further ado, here is chapter 38 of The Ring~ easy reading, my friends ;}


Tweek and I find a table on the other side of campus, away from the cafeteria. It's quiet over here because people are still in class. We're not really supposed to be here but I doubt we'll get caught.

Tweek pulls out two sandwiches as if he was prepared to have lunch together today. I don't think he was anticipating we'd share. I wouldn't be surprised if he regularly has both. I've seen him eat, it's impressive. He also shares his chips and fruits with me but says he only has one cookie and it's for him. I snicker, noting Tweek's sweet tooth. I tell him it's fine because contrariwise I don't really like sweet things.

Tweek talks about class and I should be keeping up because Tweek never talks about anything but, man... I can't help it when my mind wanders. He said, 'Of course, I like you.' Of course. Was it obvious? I think back seriously. Wasit obvious? Am I just a big, fat fucking idiot? Well…

Ah, fuck! What did he mean, of course?!

He- He- He said he was gonna beat me up when he outed me, he humiliated me, insulted me, assured me I had no chance multiple times, literally blatantly said he doesn't like me (Most recently, Saturday, the day after I asked him out and we started dating), acts like he doesn't trust me like I've been the one that's proven to be untrustworthy. Told me I couldn't come to his house… And the first time we boxed, he seriously knocked me out!

So did he obviously like me then? When we kissed the first time? I don't honestly remember it that well but he definitely threatened me and then he shoved me like we were gonna fight before… kissing me? Did he kiss me? I was so happy, I just tried not to think about it. I thought it was bizarre and couldn't reason it in my head so I let it go. (Little did I know what I was in for.)

Tweek never really acted like he liked me unless he needed to. Why did everyone treat me like I was crazy for being doubtful? Even when I finally asked him, he was dodgy about it. He only told me he liked me today.

I wasn't paying attention by the end of it so, I end up cutting him off. "Tweek," I say abruptly.

Tweek stares at me, a bit dumbfounded. "Wow, were you seriously not listening that whole time?"

I feel bad but, I can't help it. I ignore him. "When was it obvious?"

"Huh?"

"You said you obviously like me but it wasn't obvious at all. So, when did it start?"

"Huh?"

"When did you start to obviously like me?"

As Tweek processes he gets increasingly flustered. "That's what you were thinking about?"

"You knew when I started to like you, so when did you start to like me?"

"Don't just assume shit."

"Since we kissed?" Tweek flushes. I'm pleasantly surprised. "That long, huh?"

"Why are you even asking?" A solid confirmation?

"Or, at least then?" Tweek looks annoyed so I keep pressing. I tap my chin in genuine thought. "Is it possible… you were mean because you liked me the whole time?"

"Agh! It's not even like that!"

"Like you'd tell me the truth even if you did," I mutter.

"I thought we moved on from this!" He rubs his forehead.

"What's the big deal? You know everything about me. You never talk about yourself." Tweek's stunted but claims it not fair for me to say that here. "Yeah, and you're so selective about what you will tell me. Even then, it's sometimes been lies. Who knows what was true. If any of it was."

"And would you quit calling me a liar?!" I look off disappointed. Tweek sighs, heavily. "Today, you're like, extra annoying. It's really pissing me off." Before I can come back with a remark, Tweek continues, "I don't know. What time?" I relay my confusion on my face. "Which time do you wanna know about? The first time I liked you or… like, now."

I'm very slow at first. Actually, no, I still don't really get it. "Was there more than one time that you liked me?"

"I had a crush on you," Tweek corrects. "When we were kids. It wasn't serious and by the end of it, I didn't like you very much at all."

"Hm," I reminisce. "Yeah, not my finest hour. I'm sorry about that, by the way."

Tweek blinks. He looks embarrassed like he thinks he's said too much. "I mean, we were kids. I had irrational OCD. I was an easy target."

Jeez… "Yeah," I repeat, more defeated. "I'm really sorry about all of that."

He looks away. "I'm saying you don't have to apologize. You didn't know any better and it's not like I really care about that now," he says. "Seriously, what's that matter now?"

"I never apologized," I explain. "And it's not like it's your fault you have OCD. Why should you have to suffer unnecessarily? I was a dick."

"Doesn't matter," he continues to brush me off. "And then, I don't know when I started to like you again. I wasn't keeping track."

"You were so mean when you found out. Like you were gonna beat me up but, didn't you kiss me?"

Tweek scoffs, "Like anyone's gonna remember who kissed who." Is this a cop out or does he seriously not remember? If it was me, wouldn't he have just said so?

"Why were you such an asshole? Even before then, you acted like you hated me." Tweek struggles with the question for a minute. He averts his eyes. "Oh…" Right. He would hate me, wouldn't he?

"It wasn't like I was still mad about what happened when we were kids," he clarifies. "I never had many friends. I'm not good with people. It was hard for me to deal with you and understand what I was feeling. So, I fucked it up a lot…" he says. "And I was pretty sure you were gonna turn out to be an asshole and screw me over in some way, shape, or form." Basically, he was still mad about what happened when we were kids… Or at least, suffering some form of PTSD from it.

"Even after, you treated me pretty bad then too."

"Whatever," he says. "You always acted like you're world was ending just because you liked me and I was a guy. Why would I be open about my feelings when you were clearly just curious?" Tweek says. I can't deny that. I was really obvious about it too, wasn't I? I also never thought about how that'd make Tweek feel. I was too caught up in my own problems. "And then, it wasn't just me. You agreed you just wanted something casual. You'd always randomly say something that made me doubt you really liked me or guys, at all."

I hum in thought. "How come you didn't say anything after I confessed when I was drunk?"

"What is this? An interrogation?" This is the first time I've felt I'm allowed to ask such questions. This is also the first time Tweek's been so honest too. I'm thankful when Tweek doesn't wait for an answer. I didn't have one. "I really don't understand what you don't understand about it. You were belligerent. Why would I take anything you said seriously?"

I think I had categorized that memory as a dream for some reason. After he told me what happened, it all came rushing back to me. And I'm really struggling with knowing that it happened and Tweek's response was... nothing at all. To pretend it hadn't happened. "How do you just completely brush that off?"

Tweek shrugs. "Honestly, I thought you said you forgot because you didn't want to deal with it," he says. "So, I didn't bring it up." I can, maybe, buy that. But, shit, is Tweek really that insecure? Is it my fault?! Fuck! "Half that and half... I didn't really wanna deal with it either."

"If you liked me, shouldn't it have made you happy? That I told you I liked you?"

Tweek inhales slowly and exhales sharply. "If anything, it pissed me off, Craig," he says. "Because, again, you were so drunk, you were barely making any sense! Why would a stupid, drunk confession like that impress me? Nobody would be happy about that." Stupid? I don't know what I want from him. I should just let this go. I suppose I can see where he's coming from. Even though it's not how I personally would have reacted.

"Right..." I say. "And what about when we first started boxing and you knocked me out?"

"...What about it?"

"I always had a feeling it was intentional. Even more so now. What happened?"

"Jerk," Tweek mumbles, staring at his food. "It was an accident."

I gasp, "You motherfucker." He's lying! Since he's been telling the truth this whole time, it was really obvious too. "I can't believe this." No way. I always knew it in the back of my mind but... "Why?!"

Tweek looks pissed off that he gave himself away. Honestly if he had maintained eye contact, maybe I wouldn't' have noticed. He was so natural about it. "Why, what? I didn't do it on purpose!" he insist.

"Not still mad about what happened when we were kids, my ass!"

"I wasn't!" he says. He averts his eyes but not in the same way as when he was lying. This is more of a, 'too guilty or ashamed' kind of avoidance. "I just wanted to humble you. I didn't think you'd seriously go unconscious."

"Wow. Bullshit. You've never hit me in the face that hard again."

"Fucking duh. That's what I just said. I didn't have a gauge of what would knock you out," he says. "Why would I do it again? I still continued to humble you." I snort, shaking my head. "What else? What's the next question?"

"Um..." I start. "Before, that thing you said about not knowing if you liked guys..." Because if he knew he had a crush on me when we were kids, has he known the whole time? Not to mention his parents awareness. It just doesn't line up with the answer he gave previously.

"Oh, that?" he says with a bit of a chuckle. "That one was... just a lie," he admits.

"Why would you lie about that when I told you I was gay though?"

His head drops back and he sighs. "I don't know, Craig! I don't have an answer for everything I do. I'm sorry I lied. The question made me uncomfortable."

"So, you like guys though?"

"How dense are you?"

"I just mean… Do you like girls too?"

"I used to think I could," he says. "They're pretty." He blushes, "But, um, just… no. I don't think it would work." I stare at him, waiting for further explanation. He struggles a bit to find one. "Kind of, missing something important?"

"You mean 'cause you bottom?" Tweek grits and bears it with a tight nod. It's cute. He seems determined to not let this embarrass him. "Thought you said it was weird."

"I said it felt good."

"You didn't say it felt that good."

Tweek grows frustrated. "It's obvious I like it! I told you I didn't want to top!" Is that what he said?

"Wow, even if I really wanted to try bottoming?" I'm only teasing.

Tweek looks half dejected and half in disbelief. "Is that something you really wanted to try, Craig?" Tweek gets way too serious but, not like he wants to do it… More like, just the idea is upsetting him.

"Nah," I say. "Not currently," I feel like throwing in. Truthfully, I was joking but somehow this pisses me off.

I knew he liked it but, enough to determine his sexuality? He liked it so much he doesn't even want to try topping? (Or I'm just too fucking ugly- What kinds of insecurities am I suddenly having and why?!)

And he acted so against it, at first.

Hm, I got really lucky back then. You know, God? I never did thank you for that coin flip. It's good to know you're looking out for me even in trivial matters… (Wait, then, which is it? Am I happy I didn't have to deal with it or disappointed Tweek doesn't want to hold me? Digress! Digress!)

I suppose things could've gone well either way. I wasn't oppose to it but, from what I've gathered Tweek's fantasy is being dominated. I also think he might get turned on when he's embarrassed. Something like a humiliation kink? I always sort of knew that… right? Yeah, because that's the reason I initially pictured him being the bottom. Well, that and I have a preference for the more dominating role. This is why Tweek and I work so well together.

Spanking, he said… The more I think about it, it doesn't sound like a bad idea. It would probably surprise Tweek if I just prepared this and did it. Tie him up, maybe? Blindfold? Over my knee, bare-assed- No, naked, completely. But, now we have a safe word. I can do that without worrying about Tweek. He can play along and pretend he hates it and I'll know he's really enjoying it. Otherwise, he'd stop it.

"You're always like, no, Craig, don't!" I mock him.

Tweek flushes. "Cause it turns me on, stupid!"

I chuckle, "Yeah, me too."

"Then what the hell are we talking about?" He collapses into his hands.

"So, revisiting the spanking thing…"

Tweek perks up and slams his hands over my mouth. He looks into my eyes, desperately. "Craig, I seriously can't take much more of this conversation. Please," he says. "Like, at least wait until we're out of school- No! Wait until finals end next week. Please, for my sake, okay?"

The bell rings anyways. But, whatever. He's right. I don't know how I got reprimanded until next week though. Hopefully, he didn't mean that?

I walk Tweek to class, telling him I'll see him later before heading to gym. I really shouldn't have. I'm gonna be late now but, I couldn't leave him.

Tweek's never done that before… Or, well, I guess he has done stuff similar. Right, he's always been like that. Direct, upfront, blunt.

I don't care if you do like me, I'll still kick your ass!

...Yet, at the same time, somehow he's none of those things. I laugh to myself, even when the bell does finally ring and I'm still walking through the halls. He's gotten way better since then. I kind of forgot he even used to act that way. I guess that's the difference. He confronted me before but he wasn't being truthful himself. Back then, we could've fought for real. Now, I don't think I'd ever seriously fight Tweek.

Right after that time we almost fought and kissed instead, Tweek got really docile. A complete 180 from his usual hostility, at the time. Like a feral animal that had been tamed. I laugh some more as I enter the locker room. I'm remembering all kinds of things.

Before I head to my locker, I stop by coaches office. "Hey, Coach."

"Craig," he says, on his computer. He's reading emails or something work related because he's got his glasses on.

"This will probably be annoying," I pop a squat in the chair near the door. "But, I was really thinking about it," I tell him. "And, I don't know if it's too late but, the boxing thing we talked about last time…" Coach finally looks up from his screen. "Where would I start?"