Chapter 16: The Final Breather

Perspective: Fristad


I step outside into the cold. Everyone's asleep. I don't want to yet. Tomorrow, it's going to be Warnado and Amanda and I's job to start the avalanche and subdue whatever officer they send our way. My heart feels fragile at the very thought - it's like the muscle suddenly turns to paper and I find myself waiting for it to burst - but I know I must do it. For everyone back home. For everyone in Nexus. For myself, because this is my choice.

I know this Entity, this thing is not going to stop until it takes everything. I'm going to be the person I wish to be, without the say of the Book and against my desire just to run back home at the first possibility. And by Notch that desire is strong. As my breath billows up past my view in a cloud, I briefly contemplate trying to disappear into it. It's fleeting, however, and I feel bad.

I remind myself I've got a fairly easy dear. I'm not on the front lines like Steve and Jennifer. Heck, I'm not even a noticeable target like Astro and the archers. I say a little prayer for the first two. They've been there for me from the start. I've hardly met people this generous and supportive and brave. Maybe Jonas, maybe Airlass… I swear to myself I'll see them again.

I go up to a tree and begin to chop it to give vent to some frustration. However, as I reach the last swing, I hear "Hey Fristad!" sound out from behind me.

Crack! The tree falls backwards toward me and I spin out of the way on instinct. I search for whoever called out to me. It's Destiny, who blankly stares at the tree as it accelerates down toward her.

"Destiny! Look out!" I call.

Destiny stamps her foot. A pillar of ice rises up and stops the tree mid-descent. She blinks. Her cheeks knot up as she stifles laughter.

"That tree almost crushed you!" I say, exasperated.

"Oops," shrugs Destiny, before doubling over laughing.

A bottle falls out of her jacket. She's drunk. Not astonishingly drunk, but tipsy enough for it to throw her off. I join in the laughter.

"How was your past self?" I ask as I move in to place a hand on her back and guide her back inside.

"Anya was good," she says, calming herself. "We're both looking forward to tomorrow."

"Really?" I calmly inquire. "I'm terrified."

"Ah, you're new to all this. I've been through enough to accept that if I die, I die. I'm at peace with whatever comes next."

I should be surprised by this level of honesty, but Destiny and I have been speaking like this since election day. It's just nice to have someone I can be upfront with about my less cheery thoughts. With the Book, I always had to be careful, lest the slightest negative thought be twisted into a reason for submission. So, I bottled a lot up.

"Maybe you have the right idea," I say, trying to get a taste for the thought, letting it roll around my mind a bit. "If we die, we die."

Destiny stumbles.

"Damn! Sorry, stupid twig. No, no, don't accept that."

She looks up at me with rolling, imprecise eyes, having to try a few times to achieve eye contact. A hand presses against my chest and she points at me. We're just outside the door of the shelter.

"You have a life to get back to. Cling to it. Follow the thread, man," she says. "Promise me you'll go back there. That Airlass girl sounds nice! Go for it, buddy, you can do it."

"Okay," I chuckle. "You're clearly drunk but I promise."

"Awesome." Her eyes fall, then she adds: "What you want is still there. Try and get it."

I agree silently, and it feels odd. I let it settle for a minute, then decide seriousness has had its day. A little bit of levity seems apt.

"So, what's confused Anya the most, so far? This can't be an easy setup to explain."

She immediately lights up.

"Oh, it's easily Kir, she just can't get over him! Kay working for Herobrine also offends her. She genuinely won't even acknowledge it when I mention him. Straight up blanks me and sets up a thousand-yard stare. It's hilarious!"

And so, we laugh and joke and tease, allowing ourselves to forget what's coming in the space between the front door and the dormitory. A nice little stretch of safety before the coming battle.