Chapter 34

SPOV

My anxiety levels were bouncing all over the place after we left Gaia's. I hadn't said much to anyone because I was still trying to work through everything that Gaia had said. It was a relief that I honestly believed that Gaia had no knowledge of what Allegro had done or was a part of the deception of her missing jewelry yet at the same time I was upset with how Gaia would react if she knew. How could Allegro be so cold as to steal from her own mother? Then again, I suppose it had allowed Gaia to claim the insurance money that had ensured her survival. I suppose in some ways I was also placated that my grandfather had done what seemed the right thing to do, by leaving Italy when he had. It must have been so hard for him to do that, to leave a loving mother behind all because of an evil brother. Being twins he was bound to have become embroiled in what his brother had been doing. I'd shuddered at the thought of what he had been doing that my grandfather had seen his only escape as leaving.

Then there was the bag of jewelry that Ranger now had in his possession. I'd been so afraid that had I kept hold of them something would have happened, and I would have lost them, or someone might have mugged me. Being at the airport had brought on a whole new set of worries. I didn't have a passport. Mine was at home in my apartment and the Italian one had been destroyed in the explosion at Allegro's apartment. I suppose that I should have known that Ranger would have that covered, though seeing the name had surprised me, Mrs. Ania Pardo. Ranger had assured me that it was a coincidence, that Hector had been the one to choose the first name because it was derived from the name that he called me, Estefania. Apparently, Tank had brought the passports for me and Ranger when he knew I was in trouble after Ranger and the guys rescued me from Saudi Arabia. Yeah you guessed, my husband was Marc Pardo.

After an easy walk through at security we'd walked hand in hand to our departure gate. I wasn't sure what had happened to all of the weapons that we'd had but knew that I was carrying one of the laptops with me. Les was with us, but I hadn't seen Hector and Bobby.

The flight was with Emirates and Ranger had gone all out to ensure our comfort, so we were travelling first class. I have to admit that the seats seemed larger than the BA ones and how they reclined was easier with the inclusive section for legs and feet. Of course, I still didn't like taking off but maybe I was getting used to it now and wasn't as paranoid as I had been in the past.

Sipping on my glass of champagne the main focus on my mind was that I would be in Trenton soon and I wasn't too sure how I felt about that. It was one of those things that had my anxiety doing flip flops in my stomach. I felt Ranger take my hand so turned to look at him. I felt a bit scruffy sat next to him wearing jeans and a thin sweater when he was wearing black trousers, black loafers and a black polo sweater. I suppose in some ways he was the cause of some of my anxiety. So much had happened while we'd been in Italy, but I was worried that it wouldn't transfer once we were back home. Thoughts of Hawaii haunted me, hadn't we found something special there as well only for it to fade into nothing when we got home? At the time I'd cursed Joe for turning up as he had but thinking about it now I suppose it had been a wake up call.

That illusion had disappeared as soon as my feet hit the ground in Trenton, leaving me only with memories that I'd tried so hard to push away into the recesses of my mind. I'd felt embarrassed that I actually believed that there could be something between Ranger and me but then was relieved when the whole week had never been mentioned by anyone. Well apart from trying to explain the mark on my ring finger. The events that followed that soon brought my world crashing back down onto me. I sighed as I reminisced, which didn't go unnoticed by Ranger.

"Are you having second thoughts?"

I was sure that I was frowning because I had no idea what he was talking about.

"About what?"

"Living with me"

Not me, but was Ranger? Had he realized that he was making a huge mistake? I mean who would want to live with me or have me living with them?

"No. Are you, because if you are then you need to tell me now"

Maybe I could cope like I had done after Hawaii, though I wasn't sure just how easy that would be.

"No. I had so many regrets after Hawaii. I lived that week in the moment and regretted everything that I said to you"

Well shit, so he had gone through the same emotions as I had?

"I should never have said that we could just accept the week as an escape from the world as a way of protecting my heart, because it wasn't"

Okay, that had me looking intently at him as I tried to translate what he meant. Yes, he had said that to me after the second day and I'd accepted his words as meaning exactly that. An escape where we could take advantage of being together, enjoying each other's company. The problem was that it had meant far more to me than that. As usual I became emotionally involved even knowing that my heart was on the line. I'd wanted what he had to give me knowing that we'd return home and go back to the friendship, with no attachment, that we'd had.

"I was still doing work for the government, and you were still with Morelli. I suppose I wanted to experience what being with you would be like and you took my breath away Babe. It made me want more but also made me back away from you. We weren't in the right place for it to have worked out, but we are now"

I smiled at him because everything that he'd said was so right. I was maybe still involved with Joe though the fact that Joe never mentioned me being in Hawaii either probably should have told me that he was worried about it. If you didn't talk about it then it hadn't happened, right?

"I told Joe that we were finished before coming to Italy but it worries me that he was at Rangeman. For some reason Joe has this notion that he's the only man that I should be with. Even after I told him we were finished he was still saying to think it over and that I'd change my mind. I haven't and I won't. I know who I'm in love with and have always been in love with"

Yeah, situations that involved the possibility of death had that effect on you. Scrogg came to mind immediately followed by all the times that I'd wanted Ranger to find me and save me. Never once had I ever conjured up an image of Joe. Huh, that was an enlightening thought.

"Have you thought anymore about where you want to live?"

I had done. I had acknowledged to myself that my apartment was somewhere I felt was mine. No one could kick me out and leave me destitute like Dickie had done, I suppose it was another layer of security that I'd had somewhere to run to.

"With you. I have to learn to trust that you would never throw me out and leave me with nothing. Besides, Les said that if you did, I could go live with him"

I knew Ranger wouldn't like that Les had said that to me but while I had been sat with Les while Ranger had checked out Gaia's house we'd talked. Les knew how I felt at the idea of giving up my apartment. He really was a good friend because he knew me so well, including all of my insecurities. He'd told me that Ranger was totally committed to me, and he'd even shared with me how Ranger had had to avoid a woman called Nicole and her advances. Was that what I would always be up against, a constant fight to keep my man?

"Not happening Babe. I would never kick you out, it would be you who would want to leave me. No one else that I have ever met has ever stirred in me the love that I feel for you"

I wasn't planning on leaving him so maybe what we had and could build from would be strong enough to get us through any disagreements or distractions from other people.

"I don't mind. Maybe we could spend work time at Rangeman and the rest at this house that you mentioned"

Which had the next worry coming to the surface, work. I was back to envisioning myself bungling through my life as a bounty hunter. Would I even have a job to go back to or could Vinnie have hired someone else? I wasn't even sure that being a bounty hunter was what I wanted. Yeah, I enjoyed the chase, of working out where they would be but actually getting them to the station was where my problems began. Hadn't I been elated with the idea of having a job and staying in Italy because it was a new opportunity to improve myself? What hope of that happening would there be in Trenton?

"I think that's a good idea. Being away from work will give us uninterrupted time to relax"

I looked away from Ranger to look out of the window at the clouds as they made shapes below me. Those two things seemed so alien to Ranger. He never relaxed and he was always on call in case of an emergency. I knew that I didn't want to change who I was, but I didn't want him to change who he was either. It was like I was tying him into sort of domesticity which wouldn't suit either of us in the end.

"You don't look too keen on that idea Babe"

Looking back at Ranger I wasn't sure what to say. I knew that he would do anything for me, hell, he was the opposite of Joe who only ever wanted me to fit in with his vision for himself.

"One of the reasons why I could never settle with Joe was his constant need to change who I was to fit in with him. I don't want you to change who you are because of me"

I watched as his hand cupped my cheek and felt as his lips whispered across mine.

"That won't happen Babe"

Maybe not. No, I'd make sure that it didn't happen and thinking about it the idea of having uninterrupted time with Ranger all to myself suddenly had a big appeal. Any thought of that was quickly dispelled with the arrival of food and I realized just how hungry I was. Okay it was airplane food, but it tasted okay, and what Ranger didn't eat I was happy to finish that off as well.

Eight hours seemed to pass so quickly, maybe because I fell asleep against Ranger. Yeah, these seats were definitely more comfortable than the ones on the outward flight. Approaching New York was when the nerves came back to me, though I wasn't sure if it was because of the inevitable landing or the thought that I'd be back in Trenton. I felt like I'd been away from home for ages instead of weeks. So much had happened during that time.

As soon as we managed to clear passport control and customs Ranger seemed on a mission to leave the airport. As we stepped outside, I couldn't believe how cold it was and was wrapping my arms around myself to try and retain some body heat. I was grateful that we didn't have far to walk, just across to the short term parking, before I saw Tank stood next to an SUV. I quickened my pace so pleased to see him and accepted his hug even though he still seemed to squeeze me so hard.

"It's good to see you Little Girl"

"You too Tank"

Something that I really meant. Maybe it hadn't been that long since I'd seen them but for some reason being around the Merry Men always lightened my heart. I was glad that Tank turned the heating in the car up to hot as he drove us toward Trenton. Ranger was in the passenger seat no doubt catching up with what had happened at Rangeman while he'd been away and Les was asleep next to me. His excuse was that he'd stayed awake the entire flight watching movies, I thought that he'd been chatting up the woman who he'd been sat next to. It was weird trying to work out what time it was as well. I knew that it had been an eight hour flight and that we'd left at 4pm so according to me it should be midnight but instead it was only 7pm and the daylight was just about disappearing.

Of course, by the time we started to drive into Trenton it was dark with no opportunity to see any details of where were. Recognizing us turning into Rangeman brought with it some relief because I wasn't sure that I was ready to go to my apartment and hadn't I agreed to live here with Ranger? Tomorrow would be a busy day. I needed new bank cards and driving license and then I would need to talk to Dillon. I wanted to see my father but was unsure of the reception I would get from my mother and then there was seeing Connie and Lula to see if I still had a job. I was so busy planning out my day I totally missed seeing where the elevator had stopped so just blindly walked out as the doors slid open.

A sea of black was stood in front of me all demanding attention and reaching for me. I was hugged, picked up and spoken to as I was passed from man to man. All faces that I recognized and loved, from Cal to Hal, Binkie to Junior, Slick to Ram, Brett to Vince, Raphael to Miguel, Zero to Zip and many more that I didn't know so well. By the time I was passed back to Ranger tears were streaming down my face. Not in a million years had I expected a greeting like this. That though wasn't the end of how I was being welcomed back to Rangeman. Tank led me through to one of the conference rooms where tables were set up along one wall with food and Ella was stood next it. I'd missed Ella and relished the warm hug from her. It felt weird to say it, but I felt at home here.

Men came and went as shifts rolled around and of course I made sure that I tried each of the dishes that Ella had provided. As the evening wore on, I was sat curled up in Ranger's lap as people came to talk to us.

I was warm and comfortable as I woke but had no idea of where I was. For an instant I panicked until I felt a hard warm body behind me and then the nip and a lick on my back that slowly moved down to my collar bone. Hands came around my front, tweaking at my nipples that were already hard. I turned onto my back so ready and needy for him.

I was surprised when we eventually showered and dressed that it was only seven in the morning. To me it seemed so much later than that, did that mean that I'd want to go to bed at six tonight?

"It'll take a few days to get your body clock back into synch Babe. What are your plans for today?"

I suppose being up early meant that I'd get to more of those things on my list.

"I need to talk to Dillon. Err, what about my things in my apartment?"

I knew most of the furniture I owned was old and didn't hold any importance to me. Too many items had been damaged or destroyed in the fire bombs or through destruction from break ins. I'd sort through my clothes and keep any that weren't torn or stained and probably get rid of the rest. To be honest there was very little of value that I would want to keep.

"How about we go over there on Saturday morning with some boxes and take them to the house"

I looked up at he said that because the suggestion of going to the house appealed to me, okay I was also very curious about what it would be like and where it was. I mean this was the bat cave we were talking about.

"Okay, I can work with that but I'll let Dillon know. There'll be furniture to get rid of so maybe the charity shops might be interested"

"We'll sort that out on Saturday. So where are else are you planning on going?"

"The bank to sort out some new cards and check my balance. Then I suppose I'll need to call in at the bonds office and see if I have a job"

I'd been standing leant against the kitchen counter and as I mentioned a visit to the bonds office I watched as Ranger walked over to me. He rested his hands on the counter on either side of me, basically trapping me where I was stood.

"I can tell that you're hesitant at going back. It's been a while since you had to actually chase anyone and bring them in. Babe, you have amazing skills and intuition, I'd really like for you to work here at Rangeman, maybe working with Santos on finding FTAs"

I knew he was being genuine with his offer, and I knew that it was tempting. It would take away the concern that I had at doing my job but was that what I wanted? In some ways it was but it felt like an offer of a job that I didn't deserve. I wanted, no needed to do something that was because of me and not who I was. I know it sounded stupid, but I couldn't explain it. Was it my streak of independence that was controlling me?

"Let me think about it"

"Babe whatever you decide I'll support you all the way"

I wasn't sure that I was ready to think that through so decided to go back to what I needed to do today.

"I'll need to see my family as well, no doubt rumors of my return home will soon be all over the Burg"

Probably as soon as I set foot outside knowing my luck so maybe going there first was probably the best way round. At least then I'd have the excuses to leave if my mother started her usual rantings.

"Why don't we go there first?"

I looked up at Ranger's face wondering if he was joking with me. No one in their right mind would want to volunteer to go to my parents, would they?

"It's okay. You'll have far too much work to get caught up on"

I knew it was the right thing to say even though it would have been nice to have had Ranger there with me, then again maybe not. I wasn't sure that I wanted to inflict my mother's criticism of him onto him. A knock at the door had Ranger moving away from me and I watched as Ella pushed a cart into the apartment. I could smell the pancakes and sauce before she even got to me and whilst I loved that food, I knew that I'd promised myself that I'd try and change how I ate.

"Ella?"

"Yes dear. I made some pancakes for you with a honey syrup and strawberries. There's also some snacks for you in the usual place"

"You know my father hasn't been well?"

I was a coward, I was going to use him as my excuse to improve my diet, so sue me.

"Well, I've been trying to eat better"

I watched as Ella removed the dome to reveal her pancakes and could almost feel the drool running from my mouth.

"That's not a problem. Everything is fat free and low sugar. Let me know what you think"

Seeing the breakfast sat in front of me I was surprised by what she'd said. Who would know that pancakes could be healthy? Sitting down I was soon devouring my breakfast, okay maybe not as sweet as I would normally like it, but it tasted good, especially with the strawberries added to it. Ranger had his usual granola and yoghurt which one morning I might try out, just to say that I'd made an effort. I suppose that I should really try and do some exercise, but I wasn't sure that I was quite ready for Ranger's idea of exercise yet.

I found a jacket in the small closet in the hallway and was about to leave the apartment when I stopped. My car was back at my apartment and the keys were inside, but I had no keys for the apartment. I wasn't sure what to do and was wondering how to get into my apartment when I heard a jangling sound behind me. Turning I saw Ranger holding some keys out for me.

"I had Louis bring your car here and make sure that it ran okay"

"Thanks for that"

Though I was wondering if he'd managed to fix the window and heating otherwise it was going to be cold. As I took the keys it had me wondering how Louis had got hold of the keys.

"I thought my car keys were in my apartment?"

I suppose I should have known that there would be a way of getting another set and from the way that Ranger just raised an eyebrow I knew I wasn't going to get an answer.

"Babe you might need some id for the bank unless you can log into your account"

I suppose I should have realized that nothing was going to be simple. I had no phone so didn't have access to the app and all of my documents were in the apartment which needed keys, well for me it did, and I had no keys for my apartment.

"I can get Hector to set up a phone for you"

So much for trying to be independent but I really needed a phone, so I nodded my head for Ranger to organize that.

"Thanks. Okay, I'm going. I'll be back here for lunchtime"

It felt strange not to be carrying a bag with me but everything I would put inside one was in my apartment. Maybe Dillon would have a spare key so that I could at least pick up some essentials. Once down in the garage I almost didn't recognize my car. It looked clean and shiny and surprisingly to be all one color. Once inside I was pleased that the window closed so started the engine noting that it seemed quieter. A few minutes later I was smiling as warm air started to come through the vents. Maybe independence wasn't always the best way to go.

I was on autopilot as I drove through the Burg and parked outside my parent's house. It looked exactly as I remembered but I almost groaned when I didn't see my father's car parked in front of the garage. Maybe I could catch him at Rangeman if he still went there at lunchtime. Walking up the path I almost hesitated at the front door but taking a deep breath knocked before opening it and walking in. The house was quiet, but I knew if anyone was here then they'd be in the kitchen.

"Hi mum"

I said seeing her sat at the table. I almost laughed seeing her expression as she looked up and saw me but then had a feeling of disappointment come over me.

"Stephanie Michelle Plum. Why, why did I have to hear from Joseph where you were? Why did you have to go there?

Maybe I was hoping she'd say how nice it was to see me, or ask if I'd had a good time away, then again, I suppose that I should have known better.

"I did call you"

I wondered if she remembered how rude she was to me when I did call, probably not.

"I suppose you're here now. You'll need to call Joseph and let him know"

I closed my eyes at her saying that. Why was it that she couldn't just drop the whole Joe thing? Didn't I tell her that it was over between us and wasn't that the whole reason for me going with my father out of town, so any rumors would die down?

"Mum, I already told you that Joe and I are finished"

"Nonsense. You've had time to realize that marrying him is the right thing to do"

"Not happening mum. I just called so that you knew before the gossip got to you"

I turned not allowing myself to have to listen to anything else that she had to say, though I was pretty sure she'd carried on talking as I walked out of the house. I was just glad that Ranger hadn't come with me because I didn't want to subject him to her ranting on about poor Joseph. What the hell had he said to people anyway? Once back in the car I drove to my apartment and could only find a space at the back by the skip. Locking the car, I went straight down to where Dillon lived hoping that he was in. Hearing music from Dillon's door I was pretty sure that I was in luck so knocked and waited.

"Stephanie. Good to see you back. No break ins, fires or firebombs"

"Good to hear Dillon. Any chance that you have a spare key because mine got lost while I was away?"

I watched as Dillon disappeared into his apartment pleased when he returned and held out a key for me.

"I had two spares cut just in case your keys were in your car and it caught fire. Oh, by the way the men in black came and collected your car"

"I know. They were just making sure that it was running after being left standing for so long"

"Good to hear. Anything else that I can help you with?"

I shook my head and was soon heading upstairs to the elevator. It felt so familiar and yet not, all at the same time. Familiar with where I was and what I was feeling but seeing my surroundings again I realized how run down the place was. Once inside my apartment it felt the same. Okay it was tidy but there was a layer of dust everywhere. My furniture definitely looked old and dated which to be honest was the best description for the whole place. Looking around that's when it hit me, I'd totally forgotten about Rex and I couldn't remember seeing him at my parent's. I didn't want to have to go back and have to face my mother again so maybe I could ask my father to bring him to Rangeman.

Once in the bedroom I opened the closet and found the box that I'd left everything in. I found a bag and transferred my gun and spare bullets, stun gun and passport inside, along with some lip gloss and a watch, wondering if I should take my documents with me as well. In the end I just picked up the box deciding to take everything with me. A look through the drawers and I soon had a small pile of decent underwear, some jeans, joggers and sweaters that went into the top. There wasn't anything else that couldn't wait until Saturday. I had my bag over my shoulder and the box in my arms as I made my way to the door, checking as I went for anything else that I might need. Opening the main door, I came to a stop because stood there was Joe. Why the hell was he here and why would he be here now, at this exact moment?