Chapter 41: Regroup

Perspective: Jennifer


Jennifer hated healing potions. She needed them - in the course of the battle she had broken a dozen or so bones and lost about a swimming pool worth of blood - but the healing process was about as bad as getting injured. It was like being a kid and being told you had to eat your carrots - if carrots caused excruciating pain as they allegedly improved your eyesight. As such, she was immensely glad when the pain finally dissipated, and she was able to leave the medic's tent.

The dawn reached over the horizon and scraped her eyes as she stepped out. Her eyes snapped shut like a bear trap. On account of the potion, she hadn't slept in over a day, so the temptation was strong to concede defeat and go back into the tent to sleep. Better yet, she could just collapse then and there and sleep it off on the ground. But, of course, she had responsibilities. She wrenched her eyes open from behind the shelter of her forearm and pressed on.

They were on the edge of a dark oak forest. What remained of her troops had set up a series of tents there, most of them for housing the wounded. Everyone else had followed suit when they caught up, and now their encampment had spread some way into the woods, tents sprouting up like weeds between the trees and giant mushrooms.

As she passed through the bloodstained and grimy soldiers who hadn't washed since the Entity had massacred them, she began to feel bad about her spotless appearance. As mentioned previously, she had bled and bled a lot, but it had all dripped and faded away. She hated how dirty this world was, but at least if some of it settled on her, her soldiers would understand their leader had shared in their sorrows out there. Some people certainly needed that reminder...

Given the circumstances, her division had gotten off lightly, and they were still down to half capacity if wounded were included. She could only imagine how badly Steve and Tyron had fared. She saw one of Steve's Jackals limping along, one leg missing, and she felt a swell of pity that was initially hampered by a web of resentment but eventually forced its way into an uneasy control of her emotions.

Jennifer and Steve hadn't really spoken since he joined Kay's little cabal. Aside from a brief little "stay safe" chat before the battle, the two of them had avoided each other pretty totally. Admittedly, that meant they had maybe gone two days without a real conversation but bearing in mind they had been speaking to each other daily for at least two years before that, this was an unprecedented rough patch.

A desire to power through and get back to normal wasn't enough to convince her to patch things up. She appreciated that he was grieving Fristad and now Fire, but they were supposed to be grieving together. Supporting each other. And he had decided to make it all about him:

"Why is it always my job to fix everything?"

She had been there for pretty much all the fixing he'd ever done. Dick.

Jennifer decided to think about other things because she was getting angry again. Thankfully, she was distracted by the sight of several tables stacked with bread, potatoes, dried meat and other food. The food was pretty spartan, but her stomach gurgled impatiently, and it suddenly looked like a banquet.

She joined the line for rations and left with a plate of meat and potatoes. Squinting around for a place to sit, she saw Destiny muttering to herself at a table beneath a large, brown mushroom. Jennifer wanted quiet to reflect but also didn't want to sit alone, so Destiny was her best bet.

"If Steve is any indication," thought Jennifer. "Destiny will probably be glad not to have to deal with any of my usual misguided attempts to clear the low, low bar of common decency by trying to comfort and support people who are very obviously hurting."

Destiny sat bow-legged and barefoot. She had draped her right hand over the table, palm facing skyward. However, despite this apparently relaxed pose, everything else suggested Destiny was furious. Her eyes were narrow, her draped hand trembling as though something invisible was holding it there against her will. And her toe, barefoot, curled into the ground and had raked up a lot of grass.

Jennifer almost wanted to ask what was wrong but reminded herself why she chose this table and sat down.

"Hey," Jennifer said flatly.

Destiny suddenly looked as though someone had caught her trying to climb into a chicken coop.

"What? Oh, hey."

There was now a small, yellow crystal in her outstretched palm that hadn't been there before. She closed her fingers around it.

"What's that?" Jennifer asked with furrowed brows.

"Nothing," Destiny said a little too quickly to be convincing. Apparently realising this, she added: "I-I'm trying to learn that spell Warnado does. Where he summons food. You know, get something a little more interesting than meat, potatoes and bread."

Jennifer forced herself to exhale genially through her nostrils and nodded. She then sank into silence to reflect.

She thought on the hearsay that had flown around her during the retreat. She had been too busy killing endermen to pay attention to anything happening behind her, but apparently, during the fighting, Fire had come back and turned on them. Arrived at the Hill, killed the Prophet and Steve 2, then nearly did the same to Kay and Astro. It suddenly occurred to her how much this news would devastate her Steve-

"-But like, what was the little yellow thing?" Jennifer asked suddenly.

Breaking her silence was better than dwelling on Steve's self-pity.

"Yellow thing?"

"The crystal. In your hand. You were summoning food."

"... Have to start with something."

"Yeah, but what is it? I've never seen a crystal like it in Nexus."

Destiny's mouth opened to offer an explanation that didn't come. Thankfully for her, and much to Jennifer's frustration, Astro's voice sounded from the side.

"Jennifer, Destiny, excellent. We're gathering for a meeting."

He patted them unenthusiastically on the shoulder and then trudged off, the implication being that they should follow him.

A few minutes later they were in a tent with various assembled allies.

Warnado and Amanda sat at a table together, sipping hot drinks. The former was wrapped in various blankets and staring at the shadows on the canvas wall nearest to him.

Urist, Voidblade and Rose sat at a table together. Rose's left leg was in a splint, and her hip heavily bandaged, she looked weary but alert. Urist seemed more interested in a flask of mead than anything else. Voidblade seemed mostly unharmed, but his eyes were darting around the tent so quickly he might have just been shot in the back.

"Any alcohol to spare?" asked Destiny.

Urist reached into a satchel and pulled out an extra flagon of mead which he poured for her. She drew up a chair and sat bow-legged, no more relaxed than she had been earlier.

"Finally, someone else is drinking. Come, let's commiserate. And yerself, Jennifer?"

The dwarf held up the satchel and shook it.

"I'm good."

"Suit yerself."

Destiny downed the flagon and then eyed up the others at the table.

"So, how are we ancien regime types feeling now Scales is playing for the other team?" She chuckled with forced geniality. "Any temptation to jump ship?"

Voidblade stood up angrily, fists clenched, then walked away.

Urist grimaced and closed up the satchel. Even Astro took a break from scanning for new arrivals at the tent flap spared a quick, irritated glance at Destiny.

She appeared to look at Jennifer and Rose for affirmation and both averted their eyes.

"Tough crowd," Destiny laughed, undeterred.

"People. Died."

Jennifer looked for the source and found Warnado standing on his chair. His robes were torn, bloody and dirty, and the red glow of his eyes seemed particularly strong. He glared at Destiny, and Amanda had a hold of his sleeve, though her eyes calmly swept the room. Destiny scowled back.

"Yeah, it happens," she said with gravity. "And you can either wallow in it or you can try to find it funny."

The tent hung in uneasy silence. Jennifer hated that she had a point. Steve could certainly benefit from learning that. Well, maybe not the funny part… Obviously you had to take it seriously but… Warnado had been through a lot back there from what she'd heard. Glibby had gone after him. He didn't need to hear this.

Just before Jennifer could break the silence and start a long, stupid argument that no one would win, three figures stepped in through the tent flap: Tyron, then Steve, then Kay.

The big, green furball had healed considerably since Jennifer had last seen him scouring the battlefield for Warnado, and new-grown fur now covered over his wounds. She and Tyron exchanged a genuinely warm smile and wave.

Steve looked as spotless as her. They nodded politely but their eyes didn't meet.

And the second he entered the tent Kay made sure the whole tent was looking at him.

"Ah, Urist, drinking on duty?! And none prepared for your commanding officer? I am appalled."

Jennifer noticed he was limping quite badly, with one leg encased in a metal brace. He leaned heavily on a cane carved from the dark oak.

Urist shrugged: "Dwarf drinking is na like human drinking ye know? Gonna take a lot more than one mead to get me drunk."

"Good," he grunted as he hobbled over. "I'll need more than one to take my mind off this."

Kay struck the brace with his cane and reached the table. He scanned for available chairs, found none, and then looked very ill for a moment.

"Jennifer, would you be a Divine and get me a chair?" asked Kay with a hint of shame.

Jennifer got it for him and within a few seconds he was looking around the tent. He locked eyes with Warnado and shot him a guilty smile.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "Tyron tells me you gave Glibby a grand old scare."

"Yeah," Warnado lied, reciprocating the smile.

Kay seemed satisfied, however, and looked to Astro.

"Who are we waiting for?"

"Just Shadow. I haven't seen her since she set out to engage the Entity."

There were collective groans. Warnado's hand disappeared into the unnatural shadows of his hood and the red glow of his eyes disappeared.

"Of course you haven't," Kay grumbled. He bowed his head and pressed a knuckle against the ridge of his nose.

"This just keeps getting better," added Destiny. "First Lady Justice betrays us, now his sister's MIA."

"Lady Justice?" Tyron asked.

"Fire. Y'know because he has scales."

Tyron scoffed: "That is the stupidest thing I've ever-"

"-Fire did not betray us," entered Kay belatedly. "Weird as it sounds."

"Then, what did happen?" pressed Steve.

Kay collected his thoughts.

"Fire has... a second personality. He calls himself Claw. Fire went through some problems a while back, before he became a Mencur-Besh. He… he dissociated from the ugly thoughts and when he finally gained access to his other world - the server I think he calls it - that amalgam of everything he didn't want to deal with became real. Occasionally took control of him for brief spells."

"Then, shouldn't he just turn back?" asked Jennifer.

Suddenly, Shadow entered. It was normally hard to identify the emotions on Shadow's abnormally dark face, but now she was simultaneously more obscure and easier to read than ever. Her red eyes burned with a grim determination, a terrifying sense of purpose. Narrow and sharp as daggers, they made Jennifer want to squirm as they passed over her. Something about Shadow was absolutely terrifying. Like a bird knowing a natural disaster is imminent, Jennifer felt an inescapable desire to run as far away from the little, white-haired mage as soon as possible.

She stormed into the center of the tent, and everyone drew back as she raised a gargantuan obsidian blade and stabbed it into the ground. Jennifer's heart pounded so hard she felt as though it would knock her to the ground, but as the sword sank into the earth, Shadow's shoulders slumped, and all her sadness became clear. Jennifer's fear was dampened a little by this splash of melancholy.

Then, she recognised the sword: The Entity's manifestations had wielded them. Everyone was astonished, except for Kay, who looked positively outraged.

"I'll ask you what in Notch's name you're doing with that in a second," Kay muttered, then more lightly: "Where have you been?"

Shadow replied through gritted teeth. "You know, turning my body to pure nothingness, destroying the Entity's manifestations and trying to make it give me my brother back. Sadly, we are at a bit of a stalemate."

"Stalemate's a generous term for losing," Kay scoffed. "We're lucky to have escaped with what little we have. Come now, you're among friends, no need for posturing."

"I was not referring to the rebellion and the Tower, I was referring to myself and the Entity. We are at a stalemate. As much as each of us would like to murder the other, we can't."

No one seemed prepared for this information. Kay seemed to descend into a furious confusion, and Tyron stepped forward in his place.

"Are you suggesting you and the Entity are on the same level of power?" he asked. "Shadow, if you could just end this war here and now, we'd all rather like you to do it."

Shadow sighed. "I would like to say that but no, we are not. The Entity has vastly more influence over this world than I do. It commands it in its entirety while I only found a way to exploit local magical energy. I can destroy its manifestations but not the main body. At this point I realize that we may have some similarities but… also some differences. Too different to meaningfully harm one another."

"But you were out there trying to stop the manifestations, and nothing was working," Kay muttered. "What changed?"

"Well, Kay," Astro interjected. "You might recall I asked you to leave the area after Shadow graciously patched us both up." He raised his eyebrows and leaned forward, like a mother bird nudging a duckling onward.

"Why yes, I had overlooked that moment of gross insubordination," he answered with condescending levity. "Please remind me."

"She destroyed her physical form shortly afterwards. As I understand, she became a being of pure Void magic. A living tear in reality. Do I have that right?"

"More or less, I'm not entirely sure of what I did or became there."

Fear compelled Jennifer to interject.

"Is it dangerous?" Jennifer asked. "Of course, anything that can go toe to toe with the Entity is good but are we sure we're not putting ourselves at risk by using it?"

Kay fell out of his confusion and back into alertness. Jennifer could practically hear the cogs of manipulation turning in his head and gritted her teeth for whatever terrible idea she'd given him. An angry spark had enter his eyes.

"Indeed, good point Jennifer. Can you confirm this isn't a threat to civilian populations? Or Nexus itself? We don't want it to become all of reality, but naturally we don't want to collapse the whole thing on our heads. At least, not without an escape route… But yes, is this 'Void state' safe to use?"

Shadow responded slowly. "It's definitely not safe for people, as Astro and his past headaches can confirm. It should however not be able to endanger Nexus as a whole, the Entity has too much control over reality for that."

"That's all well and good," he sighed and rose to his feet. "But I think I need access to all your knowledge on the subject."

Shadow's eyes narrowed again. "And what exactly do you mean by that?"

"I neither have access to the same level of scholarly knowledge on this subject as you do, nor can I be absolutely certain you're telling me the truth.

"There's something terrible about this magic. Everyone can sense it. That urge to run, you all feel it, don't you?"

Jennifer couldn't help but nod in agreement. Astro interjected that the headaches were now gone since he saw Shadow's Void form, but still seemed reserved.

"And, of course, the Entity unleashing Claw has made clear the importance of vetting anyone we send to fight it," Kay continued. "You, as I recall, have just as long a history of trauma and psychological difficulty as your brother. Putting aside how you might react to Claw's presence in the field, how can we be certain you're not harbouring a little Claw of your own?"

He was bent over now, almost nose-to-nose with Shadow, leaning on the cane with enough force that it was starting to dig into the ground.

"Bearing in mind these reasonable concerns, I want to get in there," he pointed at the spot between her eyes, "So I can conduct an independent inquiry."

Shadow was silent for a few seconds, as if processing the pure audacity of the request, then said calmly: "Listen Kay, I don't know how much the Book told you but when I first talked to it, I mentioned a detail that you ought to know. I eat minds. Do you know how I do that? Any mind that comes into contact with mine is overwhelmed and absorbed, that's how I dealt with rulebreakers back home. So, what you're suggesting would be suicide. Also…"

There was another pause, then Shadow suddenly snapped at Kay: "I may be in a bad emotional state at the moment but that doesn't mean you can use low-effort psycho tricks and expect them to work. I have just as much experience as Fire and while I may not be that good with people, I know when someone is trying to get something from me. I didn't stay Archmage of Rockhaven's Mage Guild for as long as I did without learning all the tricks in the book."

Her gaze turned to a spot on Kay's breastplate. "And your Book best remember that it has an agreement with me that I can and will fulfill if it breaks our terms."

Kay glared at her for a solid minute, then pulled the Book from beneath his diamond armour - from exactly the spot Shadow had been looking at. He reached back and left it down on the table behind him. His features subsided into apparent indifference.

"Your input," Kay began flatly. "Is noted. Now, see to your mages, they've been more than a little disoriented trying to heal half an army while their commanding officer is off soul-searching."

Shadow began to tremble slightly, and Jennifer couldn't tell what it meant. Was she angry? Afraid? Upset? She felt the fear rise in her again and averted her eyes. They fell on Steve, and she averted it again, but she knew he was looking at her longingly.

Kay, however, didn't seem at all concerned. He walked right past Shadow to the tent flap and became a silhouette as the early morning sun flooded in.

"Rally the troops, we're heading back to the Shelter. Assuming there's no sign of the enemy, we shall determine our course of action there."

With that, he left. A quick glance confirmed that the Book had vanished from the table, presumably back into Kay's pocket. Jennifer sheepishly followed, and the others gradually filtered out after them. Shadow remained standing in the centre of the room, still quivering. Only Warnado showed no obvious desire to leave, but Amanda tugged his arm warily and he began to depart as well.

When Jennifer was outside, she found herself wandering around in a daze. Through lanes upon lanes of injured men, women and creatures of all species. They had led these people here and asked them to pay this terrible price. She found it hard to see how each of them didn't deserve a medal every day for the rest of their lives.

Then she saw the scuffle taking place ahead of her. A dozen or so Jackals were fully armoured and gathered around a wagon piled with food, medicine and any other valuables they could find.

One of the infantry soldiers, a testificate called Raphoe, was arguing with them in his nasal voice. Unfortunately, one of the Jackals smacked him in the head with the butt of his spear before kicking him in the gut. Jennifer ran over.

"What's the meaning of this?"

"We're leaving. Old Commander's a traitor, new one's an idiot, and you used us as cannon fodder. Vanguard my ass! Threw us into the meat grinder!"

The Jackals let out an approving cry, and a few wounded soldiers around the area murmured their assent.

Jennifer equipped her bow. She was having none of this from a bunch of bandits.

"So, what's your plan, exactly? Steal food and supplies so more people die then try to flee off-world? Pretend it doesn't affect you?"

To Jennifer's surprise, she was not the one to say this. She looked around for who did say it. Steve approached from behind, his purple eyes glinting with beautiful resolve.

"Because the Entity is coming for us all. Everything is going to be Nexus soon enough. The multiverse is broken and it's all our responsibility to fix it. You really want to just be some bandits who made everything worse, or will you rise to the occasion for once?"

He was standing next to her, now, sword drawn. She reached out and grabbed his free hand. He squeezed it warmly.

"Well," Jennifer pressed. "You heard the man. What will it be?"

The Jackal raised his sword and charged them. With a shared grin, they charged in turn, ready to fix things together.