(in which cameos are everywhere)

The shrine door slides open…

I step inside into the dark shrine, gazing at the kotatsu in the center. I cast my torch outside a little while ago on the stone path so it didn't burn anything the fuck down.

...Behind me, Genkan steps inside, holding herself. "I feel… empty." Probably the shrine at work!

The wind fairy floated ahead, unaffected. "...Is this all that remains?"

"...Yeah." Maria confirms as she trods inside behind us. "This is the Hakurei Shrine."

"A little smaller than they said in the recon logs…" Shurui grandly stepped in behind us, takin' in the dark interior… "Not tha' this is my first time here, but they've always been a bit silly when it comes ta this place."

Considering this place is like a brief morning jog from the village, you'd think they could at least get a dude to draw it or something. Y'know, so they'd have reference for when a dude rolled around and decided to call it a gargantuan death fortress or something.

...Well, compared to a villager house, it is a gargantuan death fortress, but that's beside the point!

"The Hakurei Shrine…" The fairy stressed the singular! "How far they've fallen."

...Maria promptly gets under the kotatsu immediately. Hoh, hoh! I think I'll join her…!

"Where is the Hakurei?" Fairy friend looked around, curious…

"Sleepin'." Me 'n' Shurui replied at once…!

...The fairy glances back at us. "Right. I remember now." Yeah, humans sleep. Do you, friend?

...Genkan kneels near our kotatsu, refusing to slip in. Shurui sits down cross-legged nearby, while the fairy just kinda stares into space.

Maria blinks, her eyes a little tired. "Are we… waiting?"

Shurui grinned. "Unless one 'a you lads wants ta wake the shrine maiden up. I just woke up a bit ago myself, so…" When'd you go to bed, noon?

"...Wha- why would that have anything to do with waking her up?" Maria questioned his choice in topics!

"'Cause she's pro'lly gonna knock ya tha' hell out for wakin' 'er…!" Shurui grins at us!

Aw, good. How soon is morning, anyway?

"I refuse." Genkan denies the responsibility. "I'm no match for her." That's pretty pessimistic… but probably true!

"I'm not wakin' 'er!" Shurui refuses!

I stand up! "Alright, yo… I'll wake her, yo." It'll make getting to sleep easier!

The fairy gazes at me. "You needn't. If it is necessity… I may-"

"Nope, nope!" I wave my hands! "I gotta commit, yo! Gotta commit!" Gettin' outta the kotatsu- cold! Genkan's kimono lets me keep some 'a my heat, though… or maybe I'm just less affected by it running away.

Also, I've got ideas, yo…! I got tricks!

"Ah…" Maria looks up at me, but cozies up to the kotatsu further after I've gotten out of it, unwilling to move. "...Goo- good luck!" Aw, yeah yo!

"Don't do anything you'll regret." Genkan watches me move!

"No promises, yo." I march off into the darkness!

...Going into the kitchen, I slide the door shut behind me!

...It's dark.

Taking out my holy hanger, I-

Floodlights engaged! I forgot how the shrine has a fetish for holy stuff. This is bright!

...Aw, yo. Kappa scientist kappa kappa is sleeping in that chair over there, still. She twitches at the light, so I bring it offa' her…

Hmm. Reimu's room should be out the kitchen's back door…

...Walking up to the door, I move to slide it open-

Ti~ng! I'm allowed to grab the inlet, but I'm not allowed to pull on it! She magically locked her door!

...I'd mine the walls, but Reimu doesn't have a million zillion dollars or an army of horny maids to jizz on it until it fixes itself magically.

Well, shit.

Wait, if my hanger's holy…

I insert my holy hanger into the inlet and pull on it-

The door slides open. No shit? So you just gotta be surplus holy? Why's it not just outright lock it?

Oh well, yo. I flash the hanger around inside!

...Reimu's sawing logs, dude. Peaceful miko…

She's pretty cute. Too bad I'm about to raise a racket…!

...Crouching down, I start placing blocks on the ground. Aw…

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

This may've gotten a little out of hand, but I'm trying to buy time until it's really morning- despite my tiredness- and…!

I've constructed a small rectangular, donut-shaped tub of blocks around Reimu's futon. They're not joined together very closely- or at all- but…!

Taking out Deep Blue, I half unleash it, and let the water begin pouring into the tub. "Yeheha~h, du~de…" Almost forgot to stay quiet, there! Wait- I'm trying to wake her…

Aah, I'm knackered. Freakin'... it's co~ld, I'm tired…! Decision making… is not a decision being made!

The water flows through the cracks in the freakin' unjoined wood blocks, and starts just flowing out…

Slowly, it begins to reach Reimu's futon. Wait- dude, what if I do that 'stick their hand in a glass of water to make them piss themself' trick!? Aw…!

Alright, I'm not cruel enough to slowly soak her futon so she wakes up in a half flooded disaster zone. Let's just make this quick and painless…!

As I stand-

"What are you doing?"

Oh. They sent Genkan to fish me out because I was taking too long.

"A- ah…" Voice doesn't wanna work, too cold! "It's… a wash basin, yo."

She looks unimpressed. "...Are you well?"

"No." I shake my head…! "It's cold, I'm wet now, I wanna sleep…!"

...She actually looks sympathetic! "Ah. I suppose we're all pretty tired, after all..."

...Floating into the other room, she begins disrobing. "Stay there. We'll exchange kimonos through the door, so you may stay warm." Oh… "...Don't just stare at me. Go around the wall and change." Oh!

Going around the wall, I start disrobing- I'm not sure about this son. Brrr~...!

...Alright. I'm freakin'... naked now. Well, in my skivvies but that's not a lot-

"Nn- nnh…" What. Reimu, no. Don't wake up now. Why are- the water. The water's soaking into her futon…!

...Slowly, she shifts about. It's gonna take her a moment to realize what the fuck happened and be pissed about it.

So I'm just standing in the corner of her room, ninety percent naked and still as a statue as I gaze at her miniature water basin she's resting in. Send help.

Suddenly, she sits up! "Wrh…!?"

Genkan leans into the room, holding the camou-kimono out with her arm. "Here."

Uu~h. Alright, yo…!

Quietly, I march over to Genkan.

Reimu's watching us, now.

Taking the camou-kimono, I give Genkan her kimono back.

As she retracts into the kitchen, I scuttle over to the corner of the room and hastily move to throw my shit on. Cold cold cold-

Sweet relief, son. One hundred percent ice resistance is a big deal! Ho ho ho…

...Well, now I'm just tired and slightly soggy. This is a lot better.

...Reimu's still watching me, yo.

I pat my kimono. "Bartering system of the street people, dude. ...I can trade you a fish for a tuna."

...Her eyes dart over the wooden blocks, her wet futon, then at me.

And then-

Fwap- fwap- fwap- fwap- fwap!

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

Oof…

That was a relatively abrupt sleep session! I still feel rested, though. Got hit with talismans, a~nd…

It's daylight now, apparently! Maria's snoozing under the kotatsu ahead of me…

Reimu's just kinda leaning into it.

"Have you ever played the harp?" Wind fairy's still here!

"Wh- no." Reimu shakes her head. "Where would I even get a harp…?"

"...Understandable." The fairy lowered her head. "The wind has only found a few, itself."

Reimu blinks at that. "What's that even mean…?"

"...The wind has informed me of the location of multiple harps." The fairy supplies. "Would you like me to take you to them?"

"No." Reimu shakes her head again…! "I don't even know how to play the harp."

...I try to move-

I'm still bound by talismans! They just kinda slow me, though. Man, Reimu really laid 'em down thick! I remember five, but all things considered…

As I start to push myself off the floor, like twenty talismans just flutter from me. Aw, dude…!

...Oh, hey. Ha-chan's splayed out on the floor adjacent to me, a single ofuda on her forehead.

Looking over at me, Reimu just stares at me as I get up…

Let's see~...

The other friends are probably in the next room. As I stand, I try to-

Zap! Ow. Okay, apparently trying to remove the ofuda yourself is a terrible idea…! Oof…

...Somewhat numbly, I slide the kitchen door open, and progress into said kitchen…

Oh. Genkan's on the floor outside Reimu's room, a few ofuda on her back. Her kimono is just splayed out like a blanket over her instead of properly on her…

Shurui's at the table, eating some rice crackers…

"If you let me go, I could make you a new arm." Scientist kappa's tryin'a make deals!

Shurui's apparently just pretending to not listen, munching on his cracker…

"If you let me go, I could make you a new arm." She's apparently just repeating herself over and over. Good strategy.

"Aw…" I meander up to the table! "Psychological warfare, dude."

"Tell me about it…" Shurui leans back into his chair, staring up at the ceiling. "This girl likes ta hear 'erself talk…"

"You can't be happy with one arm." The kappa tries to make her case! "...Seriously, if I ever get out of here, I'll make you one. For a fee. Unless you let me go, then it's free." That's a catchy slogan, yo…!

Crunch. He continues to munch on the rice crackers...

...Moving up to the defeated Genkan, I, hmm. If I wanted to remove the talismans, I'd have to just up and take her kimono blanket off. Or maybe…!

Kneeling down, I slide my hand under the kimono without removing it. I'm some kind of brain genius dude.

...Aw, I can remove her talismans, but not mine. This makes sense!

After scooping the talismans off her back, I leave her there to simmer…

I should go see what Reimu's up to, and what she knows! Also if she can get these freakin' talismans off of me, 'cause nngh…!

Meandering back into the shrine room, I stalk towards the kotatsu…

The wind fairy's just kinda staring at her.

Reimu's just kinda staring at her…!

...After staring at them for long enough, Reimu turns to me.

"Help." I hold my arms out-

Reimu stands up, reaches over and plucks a talisman from my shoulder-

Fwif. All the talismans abruptly fall from me, leaving me lightheaded. Hoh, shit…!

"Next time just yell or something…" Reimu gave me a stare! "Don't try to make a bathtub out of my futon."

Y'know, in retrospect, I might've over-thought that! I'm not even sure where I was going with that, but my gut said it was destined for greatness!

"Oh, yeah…" Oh, Reimu has more to say, yo… "Did you see your friends? Ah- Maribel and Renko, that is."

Whah? "...No?" When was that supposed ta be?

"...Weird." Reimu shook her head, lifting her tea. "I let them in last night. They said they were gonna spend the night at the shrine…"

Oh, good, now we gotta solve a disappearance. My plate of things to do is quickly piling up…!

...I look over at wind fairy. "You speak for the trees, friend. Where'd they go?"

...She gives me a blank stare for some seconds, before replying. "I don't know who you mean." A~h shit. Oh well. Maybe if I had a scooby snack to give 'er, yo…

...While I'm here, I should probably ask Reimu about 'blow the village the fuck up' day.

"So, when we gonna roll out and fix the village?" I question the miko!

"Mrm. Soon." She looks down at her tea. "Lemme wake up and stuff…" Leaning over, she looks at the snoozing Maria. "Your friends, too. I'll probably rope Marisa into it once she stops by." Hoh.

…Daylight nugget time, dude.

"They might've looked under the shrine…" Reimu mutters something aloud.

"Hi." Hello, friend.

She looks over at me. "...The other night, I was telling those two girls about the shrine's underside. Considering how interested they were, they might've gone to take a look."

Hoh. There was an underside to the shrine?

...She gives me a dry stare. "Not you, too…" Wahaha!

Standing up from the kotatsu, she picks up her tea. "...I might as well look now before I do anything else. It'll get me warmed up, anyway." That said, she guzzles the rest of her tea down…!

Setting the empty cup down, she makes for the doorway. She glances back first, though. "Um… fairy girl. Keep everyone from going insane or being stupid while I'm gone. Brad, come with me, since you'll just find your way down there anyway." Ho ho ho…!

With that, she makes for the shrine's front door. I follow behind her…

Once we're both outside, she takes care to slide the door shut. I don't know if it's warmer inside 'cause of my kimono and the constant chill permeatin' throughout the land at this point in the year, but…

"It's kinda annoying because of the entrance…" Reimu annotates, as she steps off the porch and marches off into the shrine yard. "...There's only one entrance, so keep behind me."

Aw. Entrances…

Oh, yeah, the weather's normal again. That reminds me… "So! About tha~t recent incident…!"

"Oh, right." She glances back at me. "...You don't look dead."

"You'd be surprised, yo." I did get nearly raped, though! "Was the crime doer person a god?"

"Yeah." Moving ahead, Reimu keeps leading me to wherever this entrance is…

"Basically, she started a mess just to start a mess." Moving onto the Hakurei hillside, Reimu stepped down the steep hill, noticeably using her flight abilities to reverse whenever she slipped on the dew. Aw… "She was looking for a heir to her… heirs, or something. I don't think she found one." Oh.

...Stepping onto the hillside-

I slip onto my ass, and slide down. "Ho ho ho~...!" Woohoo…!

...After my short, gentle joyride down the slick hillside, Reimu joins me at the bottom. "You're probably freezing, now…"

Nope, nope. "Nah, yo. One hundred percent ice resistant kimono!"

"...Right." Dryly dismissing my elemental fortitude, she looks around the base of the hillside. "It should be…"

Eventually, she finds a really tiny crawlspace opening. "Here." She taps it with her gohei. "This leads to the shrine's under things."

Sighing, she gets down and starts to crawl through. "It looks tight 'cause it is. Come on…" Won't I see up her-... she wears bloomers doesn't she? Probably doesn't care then!

Aa~h. If there was one thing I was never a fan of, it was vaguely tight crawlspaces. It's like the epitome of being almost trapped. Although I feel a lot better about a hard stone tunnel than some other freakin'...

Crouching down, I crawl into the stone asshole of the Hakurei Shrine…

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

It's dark! Again!

After crawling for some way, it looks like Reimu gets out on the other side, because she starts lighting things up with her ofuda.

...On the other side, I emerge! A~nd…

Yeah, s'pretty dark in here. The only light sources are Reimu's ofuda she's flinging onto the walls, producing dim gold and red glows…

I expected more temple-like stuff akin to that under-village fairy shrine, but this just looks like a really really old shrine interior with dirt and stone aggressing the walls.

"Don't run off." Reimu instructs me! "Weak ghosts have a field day down here." Gooo~sts! Help, no!

"I'm spooked solid." I inform her of my medical disposition.

"Be spooked." Indifferent, she glances around… "We might as well tour the whole place. It's pretty rectangular anyway, so it's not like searching it will be a big deal…"

Picking the hallway to the right and back, Reimu starts marching down it. I follow along…!

The hallway's even more trashed than the room before it. Reimu keeps it lit by tossing around ofuda liberally…

After enough tossing, unnatural shadows start to become cast against the back wall of the room ahead, as if a bunch of people just went running through the walls or something, but there were no bodies for the shadows to be cast from.

Indifferent to this, Reimu continued ahead, tossing ofuda around like it was water…

We reach the room!

It's pretty empty. The right side's smashed into by dirt and stuff, and this room doesn't apparently hold anything…

Looking to the left, we see a solid, black something obscure the entire back left corner of the room-

Fwap- fwap- fwap. Reimu sends a spread of ofuda into it-

Fwi~sh. The black melts, reveali~ng… nothing. Good.

Ignoring this, Reimu ran ahead into the next hall. Freakin', y'don't gotta run…!

Running after her, we quickly reach the next room!

This one looks like a kitchen, almost! I see a very primitive cast iron stove… there're some drawers and things, too.

"...Nothing in here." Reimu nods, before turning to the new door. This door seems to go back to the central room we were in earlier, looping around.

Before us, there's a completely, pitch black figure standing completely still-

Fwa- fwa- fwap. Reimu casually layers it with ofuda-

"Hraaa-...!" Its face flashes with colorful lights as it accelerates towards her, before becoming black mist and dissipating.

"Stupid things." Reimu mumbles about it, before looking back at me. "Those ones're actually deceptively harmless. They just scream at you and make scary faces, if you can call it that."

Oh, good. If I was on my own, that'd probably be pretty intimidating! Good thing Reimu's probably like, nineteen games overleveled for this shit.

...Some walking leaves us back in the main room! After compulsively lighting the room back up with her ofuda for no real reason, Reimu leads us to the left and frontmost of the four satellite rooms!

This one's got two new exits, though. One to the right goes off somewhere, while the leftmost one loops about to the main room.

It had a large counter in the middle, which Reimu ignored as she moved to the right to go into the deviating path. "Let's check here…"

I follow her alo~ng!

...As she sprays ofuda out like a hose-

"Hwoaa~h!" ...She hit a ghost, I think. By freakin' accident.

...We reach the room!

There's two really old-looking futons to the left, and a vanity to the right.

A long, jet black gohei is propped up against the side of the vanity.

"No one here…" Reimu briefly pans her head around.

I point at the unnaturally dark gohei! "Is that a ghost, yo…!?"

"No. It's just a gohei." She dismisses its existence.

I step towards it 'cause it's the freakin' one thing that looks vaguely interactable out of all the old relics down here-

"Don't touch it, though." Reimu asks of me! "You won't like it."

Aa~h. I take out Youkai Inconveniencer in case I hafta cast some holy magic on it to make it let go or something. "It's a gohei. Freakin'..."

Crouching down, I grab the handle-lookin' end! The top has the trademark papers, but they're pitch black dude. That means they're evil!

...Heavier than anticipated for a stick of wood. Aw, the way the paper flutters when I swing it, yo…

Reimu sighed. "You idiot. Well… let this be a lesson in grabbing cursed objects, I guess."

Oh, it's cursed!? Woah no.

I let go- I can't let go. Son.

...Charging Youkai Inconveniencer with mana, I cast Shine on it! The- the light orb spell, not the flashlight spell. Don't be confused, yo!

Fwi~sh! ...The holy magic does nothing to the gohei!

...I look back at Reimu, but everything's a blur of colors. Ah, fuck. Reimu'll save me though, I'm sure.

...Oh, I can't hear anything now. Aa- a~nd, can't see…

Um…

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

Hello, world!

There i~s a checkerboard ceiling above me. This is… a neutral start.

Nothing hurts, I don't feel any different…

Time to sit up! Woah ho ho~...

In the distance, there's like, a panning camera view of the Hakurei Shrine, except red for some reason. Also really low resolution! More like just blurry…

The floor is also checkerboard. Like, black and white checkerboard. Where is this…? Am I in freakin'... the Hakurei sex dungeon, yo?

Ahead of me is a shrine maiden! Black leotard, deep red cloth apron thing, red hakama… long black hair! She's seated with her legs crossed, tapping the jet black gohei on the floor…

"Now…" She's giving me a flat, dry stare. "Who're you?"

I have no idea what the hell's happening. "...Big tubs. The savior."

"...What?" She furrows her brows! "Okay. Why are you here, then?"

Good question! Except I'm the one who wanted to ask it…! "Aa~h. I~, aah… heard good things."

...She seems to roll with it! "If you're here, you should at least know what the Hakurei are."

"Aw, yeah yo." I feel the urge to confirm I'm not a total rando! "I picked up a gohei under the good shrine, and now I'm here."

...Looking down at the gohei in her arms-

Woosh! The miko tossed it off into the distance. Aw…

"The amount of solicitors that thing attracts…" She stood, cracking her knuckles. "Alright, get up."

Standing up, I, aa~h… what do I do, here?

"Do you know who I am?" She asks me a fun question…

...If I had to guess! Considering her design… "Reimu's mother!" She's got the design of that M.U.G.E.N. fan character version 'a her. What was it again, Hakurei miko or something? Began with an S…

"Good enough." She nods at my answer! "We might as well go a round since you're here." Oh.

...I blink at her. "I, ah… don't really do the whole-"

"The only way out of here is victory or defeat." She informs me of the conditions! "...Any injuries you sustain in here won't be transferred to your real body. So, don't worry." Oh, good, so I can get my ass kicked as much as I want to.

...Oh, hey, I have my bag in here. Reaching in, I take ou~t… Hard Winter! The go-to tanking weapon!

...She blinks at my weapon.

Buffing myself up, I stand ready! "Alright, yo…!" Does she use danmaku? Pro~bably not. Hmm. Maybe if she hurts me really bad I can just run around and like… try to out-flee her. Yeah, that'll show her, yo.

"...You're using that… plant hanger?" She's a little jaded by my weapon choice!

"Hey, yo…" I shake it at 'er! "I can make ice cream in thirty-two flavors with this thing." Note to self: make it actually do that.

...Inhaling, she takes an offensive stance. "I guess I'll introduce myself properly. I am the miko who came before." Oh, okay…!

"I'm a guy who swings plant hangers!" Fair and balanced match!

We wait for who makes the first move. Freakin'- it sure as hell won't be me…!

Alright, fine, I guess it'll be me…

...Crouching down reluctantly, I jab the base of Hard Winter into the ground, channeling mana through it-

Kri~ng! A spike of ice erupts under the miko-

She freakin' springs off of it! Aah, this is the Satori fight all over again…!

I raise the hanger defensively because holy shit she got a lot of height offa' that little-

Woosh! She rockets towards me with a kick-

Bam!

Woohooaa~h!

Thud. I land… a good distance away. Guarding did nothing for me. Her hit just outright sent me flying…!

Getting up off my back, I see her holding a freakin' torso-sized yin-yang orb-

Bam! She slams it into the air with an underhand serve like it was a volleyball…!

Oh shit oh shit-

Bam! Fuck me, dude…! I just barely rolled outta the way of that shit-

"Hup!" She's making a noise!

Looking, I see her-

Bam! -uppercut, her arm flourishing with dark, black energy. Her fist hit the ceiling, which is like, twenty to thirty feet above us…!

Woosh! She kicks down again, her leg filled with dark super evil killgore magic…!

Barrel roll aga~in…!

Thoom! She lands hard on her sandals next to me, black-clad legs absorbing the fun parts about gravity.

Nearly on my legs again, I tighten my grip on Hard Winter, and like, from this stupid crouching position, jab it towards her-

Thunk.

...I hit her. I don't think she knows I hit her.

...She's just kind of observing me instead of actually hitting me, too. Oh, man.

Casually, she brings her leg back-

Wham!

Oh, fuck…

Thud! I slide onto my back again after she freakin' punts me into oblivion…!

...I'm not sure if I wanna sit up-

"Thousand Blades!" I'm sitting up! What'd I miss!?

Arched back in the air, the miko's limbs are extended-

Fwi- fwi- fwi- fwi- fwish… Ofuda like… emerged from her sleeves, with the consistency of freakin' liquid. This river of ofuda quickly worked to form a freakin' ring around her.

What do do. This looks like a special if I ever saw a special before…!

After a moment, the ring of ofuda became a freakin'... revolving halo of origami battle axes, made entirely from Hakurei talismans. What the fuck…!

...As the miko fell from her formation, the battle axes began whirling and spinning outward! Oh shit!

Kri~ng! Stabbing Hard Winter into the floor, I made an ice spike against the direction they were revolving…!

Kri~ng! And another-

Bam- bam- bam- bam! As the ring expands and accelerates, I duck behind the spikes for a quick moment…!

Boom! I fall out of the way of the spikes once the ring's threshold meets my spikes. Good timing too, because brief contact with the axes shattered them completely…!

...I finally pay attention to the miko as she reels an arm back-

Fwap! Fwap! Fwap!

Thud. A~nd I'm knocked down by three ofuda which hit me in the chest. The stagger procs are rea~l!

Cla- cla- clack. I hear the miko just running at me now-

Before I can even get out of a sitting up position, she reaches down and tears Hard Winter from me, and tosses it to the side-

Bam! Holy fuck she just tried to stomp my skull in-

Oh, hey. U~p I go, dude! I got picked up-

Holding me up, the miko reels one arm back, charging it with dark energy-

Boom!

Fuck.

...I… wow. Ow. Oh. Fist plus stomach is pain. I know my maths, now...

Woosh. I'm tossed into the air like a freakin' ragdoll-

"Evil Sealing Circle!" Oh, yeah, you just do that…

You know, the red and checkerboard aesthetic doesn't look that bad…

Cli- cli- clink! Stuff clinks as lines of light are drawn around me, as I freakin' plummet. Oh, good…

Fwa~sh!

Blinding li~ght! I'm also numb, now!

...Thud.

My vision goes black for a moment after I hit the floor, before fading in, blurry.

The miko has an origami axe over her head, ready to freakin' execute me. "You need to work out." Aw, gee…

...I can't even say anything back, my body's just fucked. Oh.

...After a moment of me just staring up at the blurry, neon talisman axe, it suddenly whirls up towards my face-

Shink!

Step, step, step.

"And, come back any time now, you hear? Trust me… I ain't goin' anywhere."

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

Ho~h, shit!

Sitting up now! Black, gold, red, talismans, shit!

Cla- clack! I cast the accursed demon spawn gohei to the floor, where it shall stay!

"About time…" Reimu's just sitting with her legs crossed next to me. "Had your fun?"

"No~ no no no!" I wave my finger at it! "A bad woman lives in that gohei, yo! Ba~d woman!"

"Mom's a riot, isn't she?" Standing up, Reimu politely grabs the gohei and props it back up against the vanity, before patiently waiting for me. "Let's go."

Freakin'...! "Why's your mom inside a gohei!?" Four of five scholars would like to know the answer to this question!

"That's not her." Reimu clarifies. "...That's a piece of her she left inscribed in that gohei. I already fought her and beat her a little while ago. Not sure if I wanna lug her gohei around, though… especially when it's safer down here."

...Huh. You know, that actually makes a lot of sense. The 'keeping it down here to keep the memory of her safe', I mean. I have no idea how she put a fucking data battle inside a piece of wood.

Standing up, I take a last glance back at the gohei. "She was also hot as fuck."

"Don't make me beat you up, too." Reimu waves her own gohei at me menacingly…!

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

Nope, no Renko or Merry down there. Just a lot of old, dusty rooms, and an uber boss fight. Yeah.

Outside, it's still morning-ish. Me 'n' Reimu reach the top of the shrine steps.

"Chilly..." Reimu is chilly, yo…

"It is a nice breezy day." I comment on the nice day…

...After giving me a glance, Reimu shakes her head… "I need one hundred ice resistance." Uh oh. Reimu plus resistances sounds broken…!

She slides the shrine door open, and romps inside, leaving me to close it…

As I slide it shut, I see that the main room's pretty full now…!

"Oh, he~y!" Aya enthusiastically flails her arm at us, sitting next to Maria at the kotatsu.

Genkan's up and standing nearby. So is Ha-chan! Ho ho…!

"When did this happen." Reimu gestures to everyone. "Who are half of you people?"

"Aww~!" Sliding out of the kotatsu and into the air, Aya began drifting over to Reimu…! "You know me, though!"

"I'd rather not." Reimu adopted some casual posture, with an arm on her hip… "You're lucky I didn't get to sleep in today. You're the worst alarm clock ever."

"Or would that be the best?" Aya leans towards her, grinning…! "An alarm clock's value is measured by its ability to alarm and be a clock, isn't it?"

"Except some days you just throw the paper on my porch, and others you get in my face and are annoying." Reimu explains, pacing about anxiously, perhaps in an attempt to warm up… "Why didn't you do that today?"

Aya grins wider, somehow! "Oh, you won't believe this…"

"I don't believe a lot of things from you." Reimu furrows her brows at her grin. "Whatever, go ahead."

Aya passes her a paper, and points to something on the front page. "Lookit!"

"Wha-... what." Reimu's eyebrows are raised! I navigate around her ta see-

Japanese. Help. "...I can't read, dude!"

Reimu just gives me a glance of pity, between being incredulous at the paper before her, and glancing at Aya. "Look, I know the council sucks and should be-"

"Brad." Aya turns to me. "Village council member declares plan to dissect the Hakurei shrine maiden. True or false?"

"Oh, yeah…" Last night was a thing! "This dude in a mask said he wanted to give you a live dissection."

"I actually quoted that!" Aya's quite happy about that! "How could I not?"

...After Reimu reads further, she glances over at me. "And you sat in as commoner rep?"

"Yeah, yo." I give her a friendly thumbs up. "I am the people."

"...I'd say something about that, but I'm more worried about the entirety of the council right now." Reimu begins glaring into the paper! "I thought last meeting was pretty rocky, but after everything that's happened, and this? Today's the day to go down there and try to fix things."

Bam! The shrine door slams open!

Marisa runs inside, holding a paper! "Yo! Reimu~!"

Turning to her, Reimu has a blank expression…

"Hey- aah…" Marisa observes the whole room! "...Huh. You beat me to assembling the angry mob, ze!"

Shurui walks in from the kitchen, panning his head about as well. "Ha~h… oh! How're ya, Marisa?"

"Oh, it's you!" Marisa snaps her gaze to him! "...Shakida or something?"

"Close enough!" Shurui doesn't even correct her…!

...Maria seems to have gotten up, meandering towards us. Behind her, Genkan, Ha-chan and that wind fairy of doom are following…

Freakin', have we inadvertently assembled an army? This is a party of nine people.

"I'm coming with!" Aya calls shotgun! "Promise I won't get in the way! Unless someone tries to hit me or something…!"

"Yeah, yeah, more the merrier." Waving off her presence, Reimu makes for the door. "Should've posted a job on the job board just to see how many uppity people we could gather."

That's something I need to do, now. Maybe Maria can write a job out for me. I wanna get an entire TF2 server together to do something mundane and stupid. Just make the reward like a million yen and see how many people come…

"We goin' now?" Marisa looks over at her friend-

"Uh huh." Reimu floats out the door.

Hopping on her broom, Marisa promptly roars out behind her. Hoh, shit…!

"Yo, wait up…!" I go runnin' out after them…!

"Ah…!" Maria runs after us!

...The other people're probably-

Aya's already outside. I didn't even see her pass me…!

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

We are now… on the Hakurei path, towards the village!

Reimu's now walking ahead, with Marisa floating overhead behind her.

"I've just been kind of wrapped into this…" Looking around idly, Genkan admits! "But, I'm not opposed to this."

"I'm probably beyond just being in trouble." Grinning, Maria scratches her cheek… "But, it doesn't feel like it matters anymore."

Yeah, yo. "You've ascended being put in time out, yo. You are now… in time in!"

Wind fairy's just quiet. Help, no.

Aya's furiously taking notes while hovering alongside us!

We are attracting absolutely no youkai attention because I'm pretty sure our party could mulch any overworld enemy by looking at them sideways.

...Shurui's walkin' along with his arm behind his head!

...We're comin' up on the village gate, yo.

"I was in trouble yesterday!" Ha-chan speaks up! "Chief made us all hose down the walls, and stuff. All the laundry machines were broken for some reason, too…" Yeah, I wonder…

I look over at her! "Did you ever find a fat Italian man, yo?"

...She blinks. "What's an Italian?" Freakin'...

Genkan snorts. "Oh…"

"I know they're loud!" Marisa pipes in from above! "I think Patchy said something like that…"

Aw. We're educated on the world, dude.

Therefore, Ha-chan reaches a deduction. "...I know a lot of Italian people!"

"Ah, yeah…" Marisa realizes she has errored in educating the fairy. "Well… sure."

The wind fairy glances over at Ha-chan. Aw, I wonder…

Before I can wonder further, we reach the village gates!

"Look- we're even tighter today than yesterday…" The brass-suited guard there's holding up an arm before Alice and Keine, and freakin' Mokou. "We really can't-"

"Look…" Keine holds her arms up, but she looks really fed up at this point! "I really, really need to get inside."

"I'm gonna burn a hole in the wall if you don't let us in." Mokou threatens him in monotone.

He glares at her. "...Do it, then. It- it just…" He sighs. "I'm just doing my job, alright? It's already been kinda crappy lately, and-"

Huffing, Keine rubs her temples…! "No no no, look… if I don't get inside and do something, I'm pretty sure we're going to need to revise the government."

He raises a brow. "Is that a threat…?"

"You're a fucking moron." Mokou says what Keine won't!

Nearby, Alice is just kinda reading a book, looking like she's given up already.

"Knock knock." Reimu casually marches up to them.

...Keine looks at her. "Oh, Reimu-..." She notices Reimu's brought friends!

Raising her eyebrows, Mokou starts grinning…! "Oh, hey. Looks like we might get in after all…"

Alice snorts when she sees us!

...The guard's standing very still! Maybe we might not see him, dude…

"Yeah, hey." Reimu steps up to him. "Can you let me and a couple friends in? By a couple, I mean this entire raiding party behind me."

The guard… is choosing wisely!

...After a moment, he just sighs. "You know what?" He pushes his pike away, letting it fall. "Fuck it. I'm joining you." Oh.

"Good answer." Reimu steps aside. "Hey, Marisa. Gate."

"Aye~." Reaching into her hat, she rummages around… "Oh! Here we are…"

...The guard follows Reimu's lead, backing away from the gate-

Marisa lobs a canteen towards the metal bars.

Cla- clank. It bounces on the ground, rolling up to them-

BOOM!

Wohohoa~h! Blue mushroom cloud…!

...As the blue and black smoke fades, there are no more gate bars. Reimu and Marisa romp on inside ahead of everyone…!

...Idly, Alice moves after them, followed by Aya, who like blinks out as she does so.

"Let's get this party started!" Mokou sprints inside!

...Sighing, Keine sprints after her. Oh, boy…

I march ahead after them, because this direction is forward!

My party of mostly ground-dwelling friends marches behind me…!

"Looks li' it'll be a crazy day, today…" Aw. Shurui makes small talk, yo…

"Really…" Maria's got her staff ready! "Well, it sounds like it was just one council member who made her mad…"

"Didn't she want to correct the village at large, too?" Genkan recalls from last night. "...Considering the faces we've seen, she will meet adversity." ...Well. She'll meet enemies, sure! A challenge, on the other hand…

"Adversity…?" Shurui comments on this! "If ya wanna put it that way. It's a little more like kickin' down a sand castle, from the looks 'a it…!""

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

We're inside the village, now!

...Ahead, Reimu, Marisa, Mokou and Alice are dryly gazing at the opposing party before themselves. We're just inside the village, past the walls and down the main road into the square, but not actually at the square yet.

Keine's on the sidelines, facepalming… and that one guard on our side's looking like a dumbass because he left his pike outside. He's still got this dinky little dagger though, so he's ready to brawl, dude!

Across from the heroines are some notable mentions, yo.

Meira stands with a stern expression, hand on her sheath.

Albus is next to her, posture half-relaxed, one hand carefully over his holster…

Fred just doesn't want to be here. He's hiding behind Albus…!

"Halt!" Meira yells out!

...Cupping a hand around her mouth, Marisa yells back. "That's our li~ne!"

"Fuck yo~u!" Mokou's friendly, dude.

...Shurui marches ahead, and waves at the guys! "He~y, lads! Brisk morning, isn't it!?"

"Traitor!" Meira barks across the road at him.

...He just kinda tilts his head, glancing back at us. "Aw, s'rather rude, isn't it? Oh well." Cupping his hand, he calls back. "If that makes you feel bette~r!"

...Actually, Albus looks half asleep. His gaze is only on Reimu, though.

"I'm about ta piss myself." Fred really does not want to be here. "Can- can't we just… rub some mud on our faces, and say we tried?"

"Justice ain't gonna dispense itself." Albus, despite looking like he only got three hours of sleep last night, is goin' all in!

"I swear to god, man…" Shakin' his head, Fred continues to complain. "When's mister armor fucker gonna get here, anyway?" Pft- who…!?

...Maria and Genkan don't seem to be engaged. Neither am I! We're not really gonna need to do any fighting!

Aya's snapping pictures overhead, freakin' circling about… bird of prey yo.

It's the staredown…

Marisa's hovering in place, Alice is still in the air, Mokou's looking like she's just gonna throw herself across the forty-foot divide and eat a dude, and Reimu just looks ready, yo...

...

Albus twitches first, pulling a flintlock-

"Cautionary Barrier!" Reimu activates her trap card!

Bam- bam- bam- bam- bam! That's a lot of shots for a flintlock!

Ti- ti- ti- ti- ti~ng. A~nd Reimu blocked them all, the shots all pinging off her barrier.

"Zantetsuken!" Meira swings-

SHI- TI~NG! ...She ends up sliding back from the tiny barrier Reimu had to defend herself, unable to cut through it with her katana.

Fwoom! She scrambles back as a pillar of fire erupts to defend the miko from further attack!

"Love Sign…" Oh, boy. Maria's about to just delete these people from the chapter.

"Aa- aah…!" Fred holds his staff up! "Thunda!"

Zap- zap- zap! A small zappy bolt descends from above three times!

...Instead of striking Marisa, a doll hovering above her absorbed the lightning, before falling apart. Oh, man.

"Master Spaa~rk!" Good game, son. Good ga-

VRRRRRRRRR

Rainbow laser! It's almost the size of the road. Pretty sure they just got ejected from the village entirely. Like, sent to the gate on the other end of town.

RRRRRRrrrr~...

It was pretty in the daylight, too! Kinda a weird like… different light source. Really sharp-lookin', for some reason! Normally lasers aren't a part of day-to-day life!

Anyway, the spark's over now. As anticipated, Marisa has literally deleted the entire enemy team by pressing the X key and wiggling her arrow keys a little.

"...'Justice ain't gonna dispense itself'." Mockingly, Mokou recited Albus's line. "Yeah, alright. Gunslinging, stupid…"

Hoh. Freakin'... all that build-up, yo.

Next to me, Maria expresses awe! "Wow…"

Shurui chuckled. "Geesh. Talk about a skill gap…"

...Aw. It's a fine day for deleting people dude.

...Dropping her barrier, Reimu looks around. "The capital's to the left, somewhere. Behind Akyuu's place, I think."

"Yeah." Marisa looks over in the direction. "Aw. We should go through the alleys ta make it suspenseful…!"

"I didn't realize we were starting a revolution." ...Alice has just kinda fell into this situation, herself! "Why?"

"Did you read the paper?" Reimu held up the bunbunmaru…

"You read the paper?" Alice gives her a smirk in return…!

Nimbly, Reimu tosses the paper over like an ofuda-

Precisely and perfectly, Alice catches it with a swipe, and looks at the cover. "...Oh. I guess it has been a long time coming…"

"Stop ri~ght there!"

Ooh! Big dude on campus!

"It's big dude!" I point at big dude.

"Yoroi Chikara." Maria reminds me what his name is. He only appeared for like two paragraphs in the last chapter to prove to us he was big and in fact existent. How'm I supposed to remember his name…!?

"Yo-yo Chikorita." Shurui bastardizes his name.

"Yaoi Chalk." Marisa idly picks up on our insanity…!

...Reimu gives her a curious glance, before focusing on the guy again.

Unlike the other day, his armor… is designed the same, except it's either brass or gold! Probably brass, since gold is like, oof.

...After the party stops, he grins at us all. "Reimu Hakurei. Fujiwara no Mokou. Marisa Kirisame. Alice Margatroid…"

"Yaoi Chalk!" Marisa yells his name back at him!

"You're all wanted women." He marches towards us rather simply. "Stop floating around like a bunch of fairies and come with me."

"An' if we don't?" Marisa has her mini-hakkero on him…! "You gonna fly after us in them ten tons of steel on ya?"

"I'm next in line to lead this puny garbage dump of a village." Oh, is that so? "Yoroi Chikara! Remember the name! Ruler of youkai extermination!"

"Aah- yeah, hey…!" Stepping up past the girls a little, Shurui waves his arm. "That'd actually be me. Unless I got fired in the past ten seconds wit' out anyone tellin' me…"

...The big dude scoffed. "Sutoro. You look even more like a slob than the last time I saw you..."

Lazily, Shurui leaned back a little… "An' you look like ya can hardly move in that thing."

"Heh…" Yoroi bares his teeth! "I don't need to jump around like a frog to kill youkai."

"As far as yer concerned, anyway…" Shurui scratches his cheek. "What say you we have a go, again?"

Swinging his broad, plated arm to the side, Yoroi yells at him! "This isn't your business, you crippled clown! Stay out of my way!"

"How much's that armor fireproof?" Mokou steps ahead first…!

"I'll put you out, match girl." Articulating his fingers, Yoroi grins widely at her. "Come a little closer."

...Expression dry, Mokou does as instructed-

"Bu~rn!" Thrusting his arms out, Yoroi presses them together-

Clack! A nozzle is assembled from the undersides of his forearms-

Fwoo~m! A long flamethrower stretches out, engulfing Mokou. Da~h…

...As the fire goes out, Mokou's revealed on the other side, still ablaze herself. "...Thanks."

Folding his arms abruptly, his metal parts clacking together, he tries to loom down on her from a distance. "So the reports were true…" Yoroi really had to confirm Mokou's fire resistance. "I'll take care of you first!"

Woosh! Throwing an arm back out, a huge spear erected in it! The very tip had a huge, round plate on it, adorned with bits of fur, an X carved into the metal on both sides. Past this was the actual tip of the spear, a big pointy metal bit!

"Suffer!" Raising the huge, person-sized spear up, he slams it down-

Boom! On impact, it exploded with the ground!

Mokou was already out of the way of everything, though. She doesn't look impressed…!

Drifting past her, Reimu moves to engage… "Just, stop. Look. We're here to-"

"Nail Shooter!" Gritting his teeth, Yoroi removes one of his shoulder pads with an offhand-

Cla- clack! The X in the center of it folds open, a blunt cannon pointing out-

Chunk- chunk- chunk- chunk- chunk! Hoh, shit…!

Reimu slowly strafes to the side, avoiding the linear stream of huge, metal peg-esque nails that were launched at her rapidly. That's like, twenty…!

A yin-yang orb hurtles towards the man-

CLA~NG! Hoh! It hit his armor hard!

Sliding back slightly, he actually tanks it…! "...That's nothing!" The orb stops spinning into his stomach plate, stopping after a moment..

"This…" Clutching the orb with both arms, he rolls it so that he can hold it in one palm, before properly holding the shoulder pad in his other arm. It closed up and became an X carving again!

Bam! "Is weapon power!" The orb rockets back towards Reimu-

She vanishes-

Boom! The orb plows into the house behind it, breaking through the wall…!

...Reimu's behind him now, but he doesn't realize it! In fact... "Hah! See that!? No one dares defy me!" He thinks he got 'er!

Focusing back on our tiny armada again, he pats his armor. "Nothing can break my Wootz steel armor!" Citation needed…!

...The shrine maiden reeled her gohei back behind him-

Thwack! It came down on his head!

"Wha-!?" Eyes widening, he turns around-

Whack! Reimu kicked him in the side of the head with her sandal.

"Ghh…!" Pivoting around, he grandiosely swings his lance-

Woosh! Mi~ss…

Woosh! Going from zero to sixty, Marisa shoots across the divide-

Clack! Reimu brings her gohei down on his head again-

Bam! ...Marisa just plowed her broom into his head. Ran 'em over!

"Ow!" That's slightly disproportionate to the head blow you just took…!

...Thud. Slowly, he fell backward, limbs splaying out.

"That's kind of a design flaw…" Maria had a hand to her chin… "His head wasn't defended at all…"

"I'm not sure what's going on…" Receptively, Ha-chan gazed at the battle from behind us… "I'm glad we're not part of it!"

...Reimu began flying to the side, before dipping into an alley. Marisa followed after her-

"Hey- hold on!" Mokou ran after them…!

With that, the heroines all just immediately took off to disperse more random acts of violence.

...Alice drifted over to us. "Really…" Adjusting herself, she watched them leave. "I just wanted to check up on my clothing line…"

Hello, friend…

Taking in the morning scenery after the girls freakin' jetted outta dodge… the sun feels nice and wa~rm!

"You're, um…" Maria points at 'er! "Miss Margatroid, correct…?"

...Alice gives her a cute little smile. "Yes. And…" Panning her gaze around, she seems to notice us! "...Do you know these people?"

Looking back at us, Maria nods. "They're my friends."

..Accepting this, Alice tilts her head. "Small world."

"I guess…" Maria's not sure what she means. "I've… I think your clothes are pretty."

"Ah. Thank you…" When did we decide to shmooze Alice? Maria's takin' us on autopilot…!

"Hey, there, Alice!" Shurui runs past us, deciding to go after the girls! "Bye there, Alice!"

...She just blankly watches him go, not even saying anything.

Turning back to us, Alice continues. "Genkan, was it? How's that kimono working out for you?"

"Oh…" Genkan blinked, sorta caught off guard. "Quite well, actually. Ah…" Looking down at her dirty stock kimono, she holds her arms out. "...At some point, I'd like you to revise this… old favorite, you could say."

Smiling, Alice nodded. "It does look a little worse for wear. What happened?" Touhou sixteen.

"Fairies." Genkan puts it bluntly. "...I'd also like it to have the ice resistances of his." She gestures to me with her hand…

"That'll cost a little…" Alice gave us a dry stare. "Why does a yuki-onna want more ice resistance?"

...Genkan looks away. "It feels good."

...Snorting, Alice allows herself a small smirk. "I've experimented with resistances some, myself. Can't say I can wear them all the time, but…" Ah?

Aw. I wonder if I can afford more ice resistance. I want to be sent to the outer stratosphere by Genkan's hugs.

...We hear running!

That guard from before, dude! He came to us! "Ah- ah-... where'd they go…?" The hell were you doing…?

"Capitol." Alice summarized.

"O- oh… oh! Thank you!" Nodding, he begins to jog off… really slowly…

Keine seems to have taken off to it earlier, too. I have a strong feeling that the entire council is either held up in the capitol for one big messy battle, or hiding.

"There's someone I could speak with at the capitol, I think." Alice begins to pace off towards ground zero…

"Let's go watch the fun, yo." Maybe we'll even get to hit a guy! Or do something in the background…

Bringing her arms behind her back, Genkan drifts along with us. "I wonder if 'fun' is the right word to describe it."

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

We're in the background, alright!

Boom- bam- boom!

The village's high society bit looks relatively smaller than I thought during the day, now that I can see things. The capitol's still pretty freakin'-

Boom! A laser shoots out of one of the upper walls!

Well, was big. It might not stand soon…!

"HUUAAAAUUGH!" Ken's voice is audible from outside the wooden stadium!

"...I was hoping I'd get to talk to their finance person to see my status." Alice commentates on the insanity. "I'm not sure if I'll be able to like this."

"Probably not." Maria admits, staring at the boomies casually. "...Um. It might be fine… tomorrow?"

Alice spreads her arms out-

Two revolving rings of lance and greatshield clad dolls come out of nowhere, as if they spawned from her. "I'm going in." With that, she gently floats towards the violence…

"Um…!" Maria reaches out for her, but stops…! "Okay…"

We all watch Alice drift in through a hole in the exterior walling.

I wonder who's actually bothering to fight Reimu and company. Considering we got Shurui on our side… and some of those other dudes were just totally impartial to the whole thing.

Boo~m!

Yo~! Tao what's-his-face just comes flying out of one of the walls!

Thoom! He lands in the clearing before the kaboom zone, clad in his big ass beetle-esque annihilation suit. "Eergh…!"

Reimu just appears outside, drifting overhead like an angry wasp…! Marisa comes out through the same hole Tao used-

"Would you look at you!?" Tao had a big black axe as his weapon, a small black stake in his offhand. For a scientist-y person, those aren't very apt weapons…! "Worthless, ugly freaks!"

"Now that we're outside…!" Marisa starts circling overhead! "Star Sign!"

Kli- fwish. Tao fades out, cloaking or something.

Fwa- fwa- fwa- fwa- fwa- fwap! Reimu sprays ofuda all over where he was, but they hit nothing but dirt.

...She vanishes herself. Help.

…Marisa stops casting. "Shi~t. That damn cloak…"

Kli- fwish. Tao appears next to us! Oh, shi- "Hunter, I need your help!" Um.

He points up at Marisa. "The Hakurei is laying siege to this village- surely you know! I need every tiny hand I can get, here!"

Every tiny hand. Aw, dude… "Okay. Can do, boss!" I give him a salute! "I'll flank around and… man the harpoons, or, you know. The shooty things. With my tiny hands."

"Yes, you do that…" Marching back forward, standing eight feet tall in his beetle mech thing, Tao looked back up at Marisa. "Kirisame~! Come do~wn he~re!"

Fwam! A fireball hits him and ignites him, but he doesn't seem to even flinch from it.

"Fucker!" Mokou's here to bring the edge, dude…! She's over by the door, taking a curiously passive posture. I think if she went all out, she'd fry this boy, so she's just kinda monitoring the fight. Marisa 'n' Reimu're more apt to put him to sleep temporarily.

"Now, now, I do not have time to spare on you at this moment, immortal." Tao regards her neutrally and dismissively. "You see-"

Genkan holds a hand up-

Fwish. A snowflake generates inside his form. "Oh…?"

Krik- krack- krack- krack…! As it begins spinning-

Fwa~sh! ...Tao isn't fully frozen actually. He's pretty stiff now, though! "Ice!?"

Fwa- fwa- fwap. Floating out from around a house, Reimu peppers him with ofuda. Most of them flutter off-

Klick- fwish. After Tao cloaks though, we can see his movements from the few ofuda that clung to him.

"Star Sign…!" Marisa circles faster overhead, ready to bring on the pain…!

Kli- fwish! He uncloaks across the clearing, glancing back for the capitol. "Damned pests…" Looks like he's gonna try to run inside!

"Really…" Reimu huffs at his retreat, before looking over at us. "You." She points at us! "Stop him." Thanks.

Kri~ng! Genkan erects a spike of ice at the door-

Cli- cling- shink! Tao immediately jabs his axe and stake into it-

Patta- Patta- Patta- Patta! Hunching over, four freakin' jackhammer-like things poke out from his armor and fuck up the ice blade blocking the doorway-

Cra~ck. The ice shatters, crumbling-

"Dragon Meteor!" Having positioned herself overhead, Marisa leaps from her broom, aiming her mini-hakkero down at the front of the capitol building-

VRRRRRRRRR

Oh. It's literally just a downward oriented Master Spark. So bri~ght…!

Marisa's being propelled up by the force of her own attack…! She's yelling stuff, but I can't hear her!

There's probably the sickening crunch of building being mulched, but I can't hear it over the spark…

RRRRRRRrrrr…

The love laser of annihilation ends!

...There is no more front to the capitol. Aw, dude. The intro room is just this little thing, and like… above it was some kind of inaccessible lounge room, for some reason. There's no doors that lead into it.

"Ee- aah…" Tao is still standing, but not lookin' so hot, his war suit crackling with danmaku energy… "Unbelievable…"

"Hehehe!" Marisa floats down on her broom nearby, having managed to get back onto it after her spark ended. "I get that a lot…"

"You're disgusting." Tao's not having a good day. "Magus worm. I-"

"Shut u~p…" Marisa drawls out at him lazily. "What's with you and worms and stuff!? Actually, who the hell are you…?"

Tao just growls, hobbling in place anxiously. "...It- it is through this ignorance that you youkai dem- demonstrate your… ineptitude-"

Fwam! Marisa shoots a basic, blurry white laser at him, and it just kinda clips him...

"Grh…" Lowering his cracked mask, he shakes his head, swinging the freakin' beetle thing on it about as he does so. "I had it all figured out…"

"Good for you!" Looking over at Reimu, Marisa gestures for her to come aid her…! "Now you can figure stuff out in jail, or whatever Reimu wants to do to ya for being a negative nancy."

"You weren't supposed to be here!" He barks at Marisa! "Novice! Ugly witch!"

"An' you're not supposed ta go around sayin' yer gonna dissect Reimu over here, ze…!" Marisa gives him a hard grin! "Only I get ta do that!"

...Reimu whaps her on the forehead with a single ofuda, before drifting down towards the big science dude. "Look. Take off your armor, and we'll talk."

"Never." He jerks his limbs about! "Hakurei… how can you be so cruel?"

...She just stares at him blankly.

He pans his hand out to the surrounding everythings. "Your blood means so much to these people. You- you could further… body development research. We could become greater than youkai! We have infinite potential!"

"Is that really a good thing?" Reimu frowns at him. "Why would we even?"

"Hah!" Tao thinks Reimu is a funny girl! "...Why? Hehah… I'll be kind and teach you, then."

Marisa and Reimu take aggressive stances, weapons ready…!

...Tao slouches. "Not in that way, you morons. This is exactly-"

"Get on with it." Reimu doesn't want to hear another tangent!

"...Fine." Shaking his head, he continued. "Youkai kill humans. Why shouldn't humans kill youkai?"

"...Not all youkai kill humans." Reimu states-

"Youkai kill humans." He reinforces the premise! "...My~, you're so slow, Hakurei…"

...Reimu just furrows her brows a little.

"You do not see. This is a test of how we can advance." Restlessly, Tao tilts his body around, limbs too stiff to produce useful movement. "Life moves forward, evolves, adapts. That which does not shall be destroyed. Don't you get it? Is it not so simple, so intrinsic!?"

"Moving forward's not that great." Shaking her head, Reimu casually refutes his point. "I'd hate if I had to do something big every day, or… make stupid sacrifices just to be 'better' than other people, or something. I'm happy being me."

"Maybe that's why there's only one of you, now…" Tao remarks on the Hakurei population! "Such a waste."

"Honestly…" Reimu's frowning! "Don't you know how to have fun without… all of this?"

In one ear, and out the other! "You're not human. Hakurei scamp."

"You really don't deserve ta walk away…!" Marisa's more fazed by the insults towards the miko than she herself is! "Awake, anyway. Reimu-"

"Spirit Sign!" Oh, shit! "Fantasy Seal!"

Around Reimu, seven yin-yang orbs materialize and instantly begin glowing with bright, softly luminescent but very frightening light!

Tao tries to turn away, but his legs stop halfway. "Agh- brute! Leech! Lech-"

Fwam- bam- boom- fwam- wham- bam- fwam! Each impact is an echo of color, a rippling of light and a splash of magic, all lingering in the air long after one another.

Once the bombardment of danmaku hell ended, Tao was on the floor, on his back and staring up into the sky through his inexpressive, clunky mask.

"There's something wrong with this village." Genkan seems to be once again taken aback by how brutal the village has been.

...I was wondering what the hell happened to Mokou, but apparently she and Keine are staring at the scene from one of the clearing's other edges.

The wind fairy is… somewhere, probably. Actually, where's Ha-chan? Maybe they're playing together, dude!

After looking around, Reimu sets her gaze on us, and begins drifting over...

"Hi." I wave at her…

"The council's not really in a position to make demands right now." Alright, Reimu-friend. "...In terms of the fighting, we're pretty much done here, I think. Thanks for… watching." She tilts her head! "Not that you should be doing any fighting here anyway. It'd be nice if you three could help with the unnecessary crime and things, later. You should at least be able to handle random idiots as a party; you three pretty much live here after all."

...Genkan shifts at that. She technically lives in the forest!

Aw, dude… "Do we get paid?"

She gives me a dry stare! "Go do jobs off the job board if you want money. I'm not a business."

"I'm sure we can… contribute, here or there." Genkan sounds curiously neutral about the idea of volunteering! "When we find time."

"Good." With that, she turns and drifts towards the capitol again.

Hoh. So…

We've kickstarted 'fix the village', it seems!

...Shurui steps past us, pulling that guard captain, Hagane, along by the back of his armor. By that I mean, Hagane's on the floor and being dragged along! "C'mon, lad…"

Where's that Ken guy in all of this? Probably inside or something. Random thought…

Stepping towards the capitol, Maria looks back at us. "...I'm kinda interested how this place'll be fixed."

Yea~h. This is a pretty abrupt resolution so far…!

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

Inside, Alice and that one eyepatch banker dude- Okita, yeah, they're talking…

Reimu's right next to the chief, talking down to him…!

There's no Ken in here, apparently. Tao is like, upside down in his chair.

A number of other council members aren't present either. Shurui's here, and Hagane is literally just unconscious.

...From down here, I can't hear what the chief and Reimu're bickering about, but they're bickering!

Aya's taking notes, as anticipated! She was somewhere in the last battle, I'm sure, but hell if I could track her down.

...Aw, yo! Keine's back up on the council seats already! Mokou's with her, too…!

The place is pretty trashed, too. Surprisingly the big desk is only chipped and stuff. Chairs are tipped over and strewn about everywhere, and there's holes in the walls and ceiling...

Someone steps past us, making their way across some of the freakin' overturn chairs.

Aww! It's Akyuu, dude! She's freakin' cuddly-looking, dude.

...As she nears the mega desk-

-she slowly begins floating up to reach her respective seat. She apparently knows limited flight magics…

...Chief slams his arms on the big round desk!

"So!" Reimu pans her gaze around at the audience…

The audience is me, Aya, Genkan, Maria, and Marisa. Good audience.

...She looks back over at the chief, although their chatter is now audible over the silence, rather than the blabbering of the freakin' noobs beforehand. "There's really not a point in vocalizing everything to just these people. Can't I just write down some things and have you follow them?"

"If you wish to forsake the public voting process, you may…" The chief shakes his head disapprovingly. "Such tyrannic practice."

"Saying it out loud to nobody doesn't do any good. And, the only people here are my friends, who agree with me anyway." Reimu has decided upon writing things! "I need a moment to think over how we're gonna fix this hole in the mud, too. Just to, at the very least, make the village a little less of a bad place to live in and interact with."

"Do what you will." The chief stared down at the desk… "We are at your mercy."

...With a mixed expression, Reimu glances around.

"Uhm…" Akyuu speaks up, dude! "What… happened?"

"The Hakurei have invaded." Chiefy is sad. Oh, oh no, son. The friendly Hakurei invasion...

The chief turns to her with the longest of expressions. "I am afraid the era of economic gains is over." Wat. What economic gains…? Half the village is a mud pit!

...Akyuu raises a brow at him. She doesn't bother to reply, either.

"She had this less thought out than I thought…" Maria admits…!

...Marisa scoots her chair closer to us! "Hehe~. Well, s'kinda complicated, isn't it…?"

Admittedly, it'd take me a moment to figure out how to fix what the hell's wrong with the village. It's beyond just like, improving automations and government systems… it's like, an ideological problem with some of the villagers.

"...Yeah." Agreeing, Maria stares ahead at the floor. "I'm not sure where I'd even begin…"

In terms of mechanization, stop the crappy youkai ban, hire some new dudes; hell, randomly interview villagers if you have to, so forth.

But, how to fix the dumbasses that are around, other than forcibly kick them out? Ehehe~h…

"Reimu'll figure somethin' out. She's smart!" Marisa taps her noggin' through her ultra poofy hat! And man that is a poofy hat…

...So, yeah! Village politics!

"I'm going to see if we can get a moment with Alice before we go…" Genkan decides. "...After we're done with her, maybe we can come back here, and see what we can do about this place. It's a little late for me to just leave the scenario…"

"Well... " Looking away, Maria seems anxious, fidgeting a little. "You- you don't have to help us if you don't want to…"

"No, I do." Genkan quickly clarifies! "...I do things of my own accord, remember that. I've spent too long lamenting humanity's shortcomings to not be interested about having a hand near them, even if we're simply the disciplinary committee."

...Maria nods. "I see…"

"We get to own noobs, dude." I idly comment on the premise! I guess that's what we'll get to do, anyway… "We gotta think up some cruel and unusual punishments…!"

Genkan snorts! "Why cruel and unusual…? That phrasing..."

Ho ho! "We're gonna make them watch their Ps and Qs, that's why…!"

...Aw. Marisa's smiling at us, dude.

...She meets my stare, staring back.

"We're a happy folk." We're just smiling at each other!

"Whah?" Marisa didn't quite catch what I said! "Why're ya starin' at me…?"

"You're poofy." Nuggets, dude…

Rising up, Genkan moves to see if she can have a word with Alice, carefully considering whether to float up to her or not. Considering no one cares if Akyuu floats…

Alice's place should be a fun time! Hopefully she doesn't freakin'... charge us an arm and a leg.

So, yeah! We will be back after some messages, yo…!

==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====

END OF CHAPTER 75

PROTAGONIST: Brad, the Fluffle Slayer, Fairy Slayer, Accidental Human Slayer, Robot Demolisher, Ph. D in Plant Hangers, Scarlet Liberator, Village Liberator, Eientei Crucible, Sinker of the Flufftanic, Factory Disassembler, Assembler of the Legendary Air Ride Machine, Sky Climber, Amateur Espionage Practitioner, Illegal Fairy Harborer, Conscientious Party Member, Winter Warrior, Village Revolutionary, Has Forgotten What Half of These Titles Stood For, Holder of Too Many Titles.

PRIMARY WEAPON: Hard Winter - A earth/ice-elemental plant hanger made from sturdy rock; has a flower curved around the hilt. Able to be used as a jack hammer for demolition purposes. Strikes can be empowered with magical energy. With the addition of an enchanted shaft, it is able to be used as a warhammer and grant the ability to self-cast attack buffs to the wielder. Allows casting of Gaia Seed. Casts Tundra, a weak spike of ice! Allows the user to cast Ice Shard. Extends combo length by one artificially. Allows the user to jump out out of combos smoothly, and leave frost in their trail.

INVENTORY:

[Bag of Holding] - A small bag that always seems to be conveniently unaffected by whatever weird crap happens to me. Never enlarges, almost always gives me what I need if I remember it's there. Infinite inventory space. I would like to know where it actually puts all my stuff though…

==o==

WEAPONS:

Swordbreaker - Dark elemental plant hanger. Boosts the power of dark skills. Has a curvy, fancy design that lets it easily counter swords! It better, with a name like 'Swordbreaker'. Provides a weak but passive boost to defense, magical defense, and evade. Lowers the attack of foes as its on-impact effect.

Youkai Inconveniencer - A holy plant hanger, which works as a flail 'cause of the cross necklaces attached to it! May cast Flash, an attack that blinds; works best on darkness elementals and youkai. Acts as a flashlight via candles. Converted to a flail with cross necklaces! Can cast Shine.

Fairy Harp - A sand-red, cast iron plant hanger. It was used to hold a generic potted plant before being utilized as a weapon of mass skull-cracking destruction. With the addition of a wind-grate, it can cast Gust. By the addition of a steel block, its attack and magic attack increased slightly. Sparkles in the light due to fairy dust, able to reduce the accuracy of weak, biological enemies by irritating their senses with the dust. Can play beautiful, flat-tone musi~c!

Flame Salvo - A red and crimson plant hanger comprised of mysterious gems and metals. Boosts the power of fire skills. Ignites stuff on impact. Never again do I need a lighter or the ability to somehow rub two sticks together really hard to make a campfire! Has a flamethrower nozzle, allowing the user to cast Flamethrower Plus! Allows the user to cast Fume.

Vortex Hanger - Wind elemental plant hanger currently attached to the Yin-Yang flail as a crafting material. Granted a limited hover per swing when wielded, but that ability is what allows the flail-o-copter to fly now.

Deep Blue - A blue and silver plant hanger comprised of mysterious fantastical metals. Can produce limitless fresh water. Boosts the power of water skills. Allows wielder to cast Geyser. The addition of a valve served to allow control of its water flow. I wonder if you could use this in place of a sink...

Yin-yang flail-o-copter - A flail with a standard, maximized Hakurei Yin-yang orb in the sling of it. Unable to have its powers fully activated, as only Reimu can truly harness the power of Yin-yang orbs. Minor affinities from the base orb transfer over, though! Crafted from a Hakurei Yin-Yang orb, a rope of panties, and two bra cups. Ropes were used to attach the Vortex Hanger to the yin-yang orb, allowing the flail to be used as a flying device, although it's a bit straining on the arms.

Sharper Than Darkness - A dark, runed plant hanger constructed from the shards of a dead man's sword. Dark effects promote a glass-cannon style; physical attack increased, physical defense lowered. User bleeds out faster. Can cast Revenge, an attack that increases in power the lower the user's health is. A scythe edge from a mysterious ghoul was added to let it cut!

Bee-Sheventeen-Bawmber - A mechanical plant hanger enchanted to make big booms on contact. Explosions are mostly knockback based, but I think it could gib particularly weak-willed people… magic is weird. With the addition of a barrel, it can shoot singular, yellow danmaku bullets.

Million Bucks - A basic green cast-iron plant hanger, from the aged cellar of the Scarlet Devil Mansion. It's a gift from Flandre Scarlet! Has an obsolete map of the cellar's maze, etched by Flandre herself. Shoddily enchanted to give a speed boost when the wielder is lower on health. Lowers defense slightly. With added electric and holy charms, the hanger is slightly electric and holy elemental. Is able to fluidly chain attacks for stringing together longer aerial and ground combos. Allows the user to fluidly transition from combo to jumping. Allows forced aerial combo support. Grants the user the ability to air slide. Increased jump height when running. Gives motion sickness with avid use!

Market Gardener - Critical hits during blast jumps! Otherwise, it's just a normal, old plant hanger. Named after a very similar shovel…!

NERF dart blaster - Nerf guns are cool and all, but don't try defending yourself with one. Please. Unless you're surrounded by fairies who don't know the difference- but y'know- that opportunity's a freakin' million to one.

NERF longsword - 'CAUTION: Do not jab at people or animals'… you know what that means! Maybe one day this will actually come in handy…

==o==

ARMOR:

Kaguya Houraisan Disguise - Wear to become a NEET! Tons of pockets! Seventy-five percent time resistance on equip. Voice, face, and height specifications not included!

Monk Robes - Wear to become a Buddhist! Actually pretty comfy…!

Remilia Scarlet's Mob Cap - Twenty five percent dark resistance. Lets me be a Touhou, too!

Yuki-onna Kimono - Genkan's stock kimono. It's a little big on me, and smells like wet. Fifty percent ice resistance, probably debuffs fire and burning resist to some degree.

Yellow Racecar Helmet - It's like a really knockoff space marine helmet! Fifty percent sun resistance, one hundred percent freezing and blinding resistance. Also gives immunity to electrical stunning. It feels like it's got good physical defense, too… at least for my head.

Lunarian Prototype Space Suit - A suit meant for combat in deep space. So far, it's only got the whole 'exist in deep space' part down…! One hundred percent electric resistant. One hundred percent freezing resistant. Has an oxygen tank, but that's only useful if you wear the helmet to go along with it. Randomly casts Zero Gravity when it feels like it.

Lunarian Prototype Deep Space Helmet - It's a freakin' helmet. Fifty percent blinding resistant! When worn with the Lunarian Prototype Space Suit, it also confers immunity to burning and poison, along with another one hundred percent electricity resistance. Yo…!

Testing Oxygen Tank - The oxygen tank used by the Lunarian Prototype Space Suit. Lasts for two and a half minutes! Not meant to actually be used outside of testing, but it's possible. Refills automatically in breathable air.

MP Prize Pin - A badge that allows the user to drain some of the enemy's mana, forcing it to become mana prizes on the field. For awhile only the user(s) of this badge may pick them up, but after a grace period anyone can. Extends prize grabbing range!

Sun Badge - Fifteen percent sun resistance when equipped. Fifty percent resistance to blinding and electrical stunning. Replaces the on-impact effect of all weapons with Sunfire Flare when worn.

==o==

CONSUMABLES/OTHER:

Forty-one thousand, two hundred Yen - ...Yeah, just in a bag. It's about time I documented how much freakin' money I have!

Four Health Potions - They give you youkai-like regen for like, thirty seconds! No chuggin' these babies to indefinitely survive the cold reaches of outer space. Unless the regen outdoes the asphyxiation, but I think I'd rather die by that point…

Mega Potion - Youkai-like regen for thirty seconds… except for the whole family! Applies to entire party. Good for when we all suck at life!

Four Mana Potions - Restores an average amount of mana, I think. More than enough for someone like me!

Three Panaceas - Cures all status effects. I dunno if it works on debuffs, though...

Akihito's Broadsword - Too big for me to use as a weapon. I wonder if I could use it as like, a tent stake or something.

Butterfly Dream Pills - Makes you dream of being a beautiful butterfly!... now, if only there was a pill for lucid or wet dreams, and then I'd consider Yagokoro the doctor to end all doctors!

Hina's Bad Luck Talisman - I remembe~r! Upgrades a weapon to debuff luck on strike and stuff!

Rope of Red Bikinis - Wahaha! Gonna getcha, son!

Sacred Eagle Feather - A gift from a rambler. It's… sentimental, I think? Help.

Some Fancy Key - A key lent to me by Brittany. Wha- why. What's it for…!?

Youkai Exterminator Badge - I still have this, dude! Yo ho ho! Allows me to not be considered a youkai by most guardsmen!

PARTY:

London, the Multipurpose Combat Doll - What it lacks in brains it makes up for with a suit of armor and some OP utilitarian spells! Can cast basic fire, lightning, and ice attacks, both the magical and physical variety. Has lance, can shoot danmaku. Variety of attack commands now, including intelligent tracking, trailing, patrolling, and defending. Has mana pool for the stronk commands, though, so those should be used sparingly. I really have to remember to use her, at some point!

PRIMARY WEAPON: Shanghai Lance - Burly lance with jabbing ability. Mostly useful as a blunt object, it seems, and intimidation factor. London really likes it, apparently. London shouldn't have sentience, but I can't help but notice the awkward way which it just pauses before it swings this lance.

==o==

Genkan, the Yuki-onna - A bitter yuki-onna from Gensokyo's wildlands, mostly active in the winter, and on particularly cold days. Heals from ice damage. Commands powerful control over frost, and has a wide variety of ice-affinity attacks. Weak to fire and burning.

SKILLS:

Ice Control - Freely use ice to make stuff. Inherent one hundred percent ice resistance.

Freeze - Instantly freezes one to two enemies. Low chance of working on stronger foes.

Creaking Freeze - Generates a spinning, magic snowflake in an enemy's body, which instantly freezes them after a moment. High accuracy.

Glacier - Erects a massive blade of ice from the ground, dealing incredible physical ice damage.

Triple Glacier - See above, but on three enemies! As such, costs triple the mana!

Ice Spin - Spins and lashes out with chilling frost. Probably just an extension of her normal frost powers and not an actual skill…

Ice Shard - Advanced ice magic. Generates a chunk in an enemy's body which proceeds to freeze the air around it. Power depends on the user.

Snow - Make it snow locally. Very minor ambient ice damage to everyone on the battlefield, including allies. Has a low chance to instantly freeze someone for no reason.

Yuki-onna's Embrace - Hug. Binds target close to her. Makes the target tired, severely lowers accuracy and magical defense, and makes them comfortable. Skill may only be performed by yuki-onna. Negative facets reduced by ice and freezing resist. Someone with over a hundred resistance will be buffed and healed by it…!

Yuki-onna's Entombment - Final, optional stage of the hug…! Guaranteed instant death inflicted by the draining of vitality. Heals the user for the heat taken from the target. Does not work well on bosses or the instant death resistant. Instant death proc is nullified if the target's ice or freezing resistance is over fifty percent. Skill may only be performed by yuki-onna.

Other Skills - Probably has more spells, but freakin'... I dunno her like a textbook!

INVENTORY:

Camouflage Kimono - This kimono means business, son. One hundred percent ice resistance, and as such renders one immune to all magical ice damage. Dunno 'bout icicles and stuff, though. Fifty percent freeze resistance… not that freezing will hurt with this thing on. Fifty percent dark resistance. Negative fifty percent fire and burning resistance. Hopefully hides you a bit when navigating in the freakin' brush...

Money - Apparently.

I dunno - What would I~ have if I was a sexy ice woman?

[unknown spaces remaining]

==o==

Maria, the Actually Ordinary Magician - A villager from the human village. Used to run the most impoverished bar ever, but that fell under or something. Really low self-esteem! No known resistances or weaknesses. Can cast basic elemental spells!

INVENTORY:

Wood Staff - Good for bonking things!

Raggedy Clothing - Low quality, old clothes from the village. Keeps her covered.

[Travel Bag] - Inventory that exists! Does not take up inventory because it is inventory. Eight slots.

Two Mana Potions - Guess wha~t? It heals, except mana!

[six spaces remaining]

==o==

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

brad fight- i mean…

XD hello world

we've finally gotten around to dealing with the ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM: my CRAZY ASS HUMAN VILLAGE

reimu has decided to give it a justified stern talking to. :3

oh yeah and i also got to pretend to fight reimu's mom

you might think it a lowball sendai fic reference but that gohei was also there in GENSOKYOBOUND, which i'd wrote like… a year ago or more, so yeah! i did borrow the concept from myself but wahaha

sendai is now in all of my fics somehow even if she's only a lead in one - w -

marisa and friends versus youkai hunters: good fight, balanced matchup

the skill dissonance between marisa and the rest is real, yo…! or, rather, marisa is sort of underestimated compared to reimu, THE HAKUREI AAAH and all that. she might've been in trouble if albus picked her first, or meira picked her, or if literally any other choice in attacks happened (except for attacking mokou which is just a universally bad idea).

master spark is a very good non-elemental nuke too which happens to excel against squishy noob parties like that one

YOROI CHIKARA. forgot to get his hands on a wootz steel helmet so lot of good that really hard armor did

...he's also not magical resistant so marisa probably could've totalled him with star danmaku or lasers, even if he is bomb resistant

also if mokou engaged him he would've just died because armor plus inferno equals uh oh for anything inside the armor

...that, and alice could probably slide through that armor with blades or strings or a lot of different things

AS IT TURNS OUT, really good armor is not REALLY GOOD, at least not when you're fighting some of the most practiced touhous

TAO RYOSHI. would normally have a far more theatrical fight were he not getting totalled by end game gods…! that and i didn't wanna have any long drawn out action segments considering there was technically like four fights in this chapter, i wanted to keep each just sorta remote and its own thing

also a lot of characters to keep track of now but that's kinda inherent with such a massive setting i've created / utilized - w - not that i created GENSOKYO or anything but how individual authors choose to expand, elaborate, build and construct/deconstruct it is distinctly unique to their individual executions, and thereby headcanons

i wanted to do more with shurui this chapter but there wasn't a lot of places to FIT IT IN; maybe eventually, although he was meant to be more a nod to red-haired shanks and a fun face for if we need activity fodder rather than a big mainstay - w - but we'll likely see a lot more of him later

fixing the village: at least there's competent people getting this done - w -

so yeah the general plot direction is sort of aimed, and also renko and merry yo where'd they go dude where'd they go

suddenly brad's life is VERY BUSY and it might as well be since it's not like he has any other responsibilities to adhere to anymore (other than perhaps not dying but y'know that comes with the territory son)

sendai vs brad: TOTAL WASH YO, hakurei shrine maidens are not only inherently on another level than humans, but sendai's specced herself into LOTS OF STRENGTH and BUFFING STRENGTH

brad's also not especially great for anything other than support at the moment because of his slapdash fighting style and moveset - w -

on the upside, brad bumped her in the gut once! it dealt chip damage, but he did it!

as always, see you all next time!

==== OH, AND BY THE WAY… ====

we have a discord now as of the time of this batch; the link will just be plastered about the first chapter's AN and this batch's ANs because yeah

and also on my profile

https SEMICOLON SLASH SLASH SON discord DOHT gg SLASH mcVps2R