(in which we merry merry)
I really cannot focus on the game at all, like this.
"This-" Genkan's sitting in my lap, facing me. My arms are around her back, trying to hold the controller, but her breasts are pressing against my chest, and her warm face is right there. "This was a bad idea."
"Ma- maybe…!" I dunno why she even went along with it, but I'm not entirely opposed! Just, holy shit, the sexual tension is massive.
To cut a long story short: we stopped by the Moriya Shrine to play some video games, and they somehow got Genkan into that cow outfit when I wasn't looking! And then they provoked her into sitting on my lap as I tried to play the video game…
An' if I thought Genkan was pretty when she was in her kimono, holy shit. With just the bikini-top on, I can see her shoulders and stomach, and her chest basically, and it's all so good. And she's right in front of me- she's sittin' on me! Oo- on my lap, rather!
"Ge- geez…!" I hardly care that there's anyone else around, Genkan is just- takin' all my attention! Even her anything-but-subtle nervousness is just, woah...
Meanwhile, everyone else is just kinda marveling at how much of a crisis we're having over here. Ha-chan's sitting really close, Maria's super red, an' Sanae's only-a-little little red. Iku looks sad but not, and Tenshi is Tenshi.
Also, Genkan's fluffy cow skirt is thankfully hiding my arousal. I am like ninety nine percent certain that Genkan herself can feel it, however…
"When my sisters spoke of humanity defacing and belittling us," Genkan spoke quietly, to me. "I think this wasn't what they had in mind."
"Fr- freakin'..." Genkan is too much…! "Why do you smell so good-" What'm I sayin' out loud-
"Oo- oh?" Genkan looks about as dizzy as I do! "You're- so warm, even wearing that kimono…"
...Suwako looked away from the screen, to give us a blunt look! "We did it, people. We severely disoriented, aroused and confused them!"
So that I can see the screen, Genkan hugs herself closer so I can look over her shoulder- and, oh my god… her pillowiness sinks into my chest, and I feel myself just slow down.
I just- roll onto my back. "Unh." She comes with me, her body pressing me down. Ye~s.
"Aa- aah." Genkan looks a little surprised, at first! Then, she just stares down at me, meeting my quelled-kinda stare.
"Wow." Maria just watches our struggle! "They're both so quiet." Gee- I wonder why-
Ha-chan crawls really close to us, just starin' intently at our exchange! She even gets down on the floor, just to look between me and Genkan…
"Hehehe…" Sanae is smug. "This is awesome." I'm gonna take all the fluffles under yer bed, and put them on your bed. Then, when ya go to sleep, yer bed's gonna be all dusty.
I gaze down along Genkan's body as she's against me, and just, look back up at her. All of her is just, lying on me. My body is exploding, son.
"You- know what…" She tenses her body, and- ooh!
Lifting us up, she starts floating for the door! "Let's flee." Probably for the best…!
Sanae gets up, and romps after us! "Hey, get back here!"
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Outside, the sun's setting all nicely, dude. A blue hue's taken over most of the land, but since we're on a mountain, the sun's burning out our retinas instead.
shoof. A glacier blade slowly slides outta the ground, to dim the sun that's kicking our asses. The center's thick enough to actually defuse the sunlight, instead of like amplify or prism-ify it.
A little of it gets prism-ified, though. Slightly rainbow light now draws a really rough cone around me an' Genkan.
Speakin' of me and Genkan, we're just sittin' on the porch out here! It's cozy, dude. I guess this is why the shrine was put all the way up here. It looks really nice.
I look over Genkan again as she sits next ta me. There's something alluring about wearing that outfit out here where it should be freezing cold! Like, between the darkness, and how pale an' smooth her skin is…
Thankfully, as a yuki-onna, she's never afraid of being cold! "...It's- windy, up here." She feels at herself, before resting her hands atop her own chest. "It's weirdly good. The wind, and… feeling so exposed."
The wind's brushing is really nice. I love how-... airy this whole area is. As freakin' weird as that sounds- like… it's the moments before sunset, everything's nice and really blue… just, nnh. So good.
...Now that I think about that, her cowgirl outfit is alluring in general!
...Sensing my stare, Genkan looks at me! "Does having a larger chest, really make this big of a difference?"
Yes! Well- not entirely, but partially! "A little! But, bein' able to see your shoulders and sides, and your back, and like… I can see your socks and ankles now, too!"
She's so freakin' beautiful. Like; big boobs or not, her super pale skin is so hot, to me. But, the boobs are a plus! All her curves are just so-...
"Like-..." I decide to voice some of this! "Your whole body is-..."
She exhaled. "...You know, this sort of thing was more embarrassing in my head than it really is, I realize."
I also feel more natural when I'm not getting visually molested by like seven other party members as well!
"There's something very weird, though…" Genkan placed her hands atop her breasts again. "Looking like a cow. It's-... something I'm only half okay with."
"Ya could put a shirt on over it." I suggest! "Then ya've just got the cow skirt to contend with, which is more kinda whatever."
"...That's true." Genkan seems surprised that I suggest covering her up! "You wouldn't want to stare at my chest the whole time, though?"
"I mean, I would…!" You're fuckin'-... holy shit. "But, I can understand not wantin' every sleaze in the land lookin' at ya." Also, clothed boobs can be sexy too.
"...Yeah." She leaned back, and put her hands on the porch's wood top. "Now I understand how you felt, stripping down for me. Were you too self-conscious, of your body?"
"Well, yeah!" I admit! "I'm skin an' bones! Yer a super sexy frost lady who could probably charm anyone who exists- except for like, very sentimentally particular people, or gay dudes."
...I forgot to mention people into flats!
"So, you." Genkan, son. "...Nn- not the gay part! Ee-... I mean, the sentimentality. You've not even indulged in Hana, have you?"
This is true! "Something in my gut always tells me no!" Maybe it's the T rating! "That, an' like-... y'know, personality-wise, she's uh…"
"Not exactly an intellectual, is she." Genkan guesses!
"She's an 'intellectual', yo." I tap my forehead knowingly! "I dunno, if I had to only interact with her, I'd probably go kinda crazy!"
Fairies are nice and all, but it does kinda feel like they're all just fragments of a whole, or something. None of them have everything all together upstairs…!
"Fairies are an enigma." Genkan starts speakin' of the fluffy fairies, dude. "For how much trouble they sometimes give me, there is the occasional fairy with remarkable sense."
Ha-chan is pretty and nice, but like… I'm not gonna have the conversations I have with Genkan with her, that's fer sure. I dunno, maybe with the right prefacing and time spent together, we may've somehow gotten something like that together, but circumstances can get in the way.
I don't think I've ever really tried. Maybe that's something I should do, actually!
An' I really like Genkan! I mean, most of our big conversations so far have been about love and dating, and hygiene, but the way we treat each other is just really nice. An' I'm not a super demanding person, especially when my life's like this, so... hoh.
"Regardless." Genkan shifts closer! "I find your thin self desirable. In the same vein that you appreciate my… various features, I appreciate yours. And-... I do have confidence in the way I carry myself, for the most part. I was just wondering… what you'd say to me, when you saw me in this humble of a costume."
She takes in a breath. "...Do- do you think it unbecoming, that I'm dressed like this so shamelessly?"
"...Whaddaya think I'm gonna say. I don't think so!" I give her a thumbs up! "I mean, I don't really care about what's 'becoming' or not! Yer really smart, and really sexy, and that outfit's also kinda neat, aside from making me kinda horny!"
"...Aa- ah." Genkan compacts, a little! "...Thank you." My heart…!
...What a nice evening, dude. The winter air feels really good, when it can't freeze your ass off.
"You know what my ice cave needs?" Genkan suddenly speaks! "...One of those devices, with that 'Smash' video game. For some reason, it's a supremely attractive option, compared to combing over my favorite texts yet again."
"It really does!" Genkan here's living in 1919… while Sanae here's living in 3019…! "S'probably 'cause ya haven't had a lotta experience with like, interactive or motion-based media!"
"Probably." Genkan confessed…! "That, and these more modern games seem… like they're an astronomical improvement over the types of games I'm used to. That is, pretend games, and board games."
"Pretend games, huh." Aw. "Is there a game, where you put fluffles over each other's eyes, and the blind person has to guess who put a fluffle over their eyes…!?"
"I hope not." Genkan shook her head! "That game sounds horrifying."
I wonder. "...Have ya ever played Chess?"
...Genkan shook her head again! "I'm more familiar with Shogi." Oh. Yeah- Chess is basically that, except worse. Wait, aw…
I stand up! "We should teach each other the two games, dude!"
Genkan snorted. "As if the gods would have- a chess board…" She slows down, reconsidering her words! "I'm sure they could simply create one, now that I think about it." Yeah, it ain't rocket science!
Genkan stands up- and bouncing breasts holy shit-
She notices me staring! "...I wonder."
"Hi." I, uh, gaze back up at her eyes-
"Would you be fine, if I dressed you up in a way that I found… desirable?" Genkan put forward an interesting question!
"Probably- yes, actually." I would really not mind. I mean, half the reason I wear anything is like-... in fact, the entire reason I wear anything's half to be a shitlord, an' half for utility…! "If I needed elemental resistance, I'd probably be swapping outfits a lot, though."
Genkan snorted! "...I'll keep that in mind."
An' then, she brings up a new topic! "You know… why are breasts desirable?" Uh oh…!
"...Well." I mean, a lot of that's probably rooted in like neurological shenanigans, since pleasure's a like, carnal thing. Like food, an' water! An' social stuff, to an extent. "They look really soft, and really good."
"...Is that so." Genkan's not impressed by the answer! "Fluffles are soft."
"The thing about boobs is like-..." Let's break it down a little! "On the outside, they studied 'em."
"Of course." Genkan probably took that in a lewder direction than I intended! "Did they conclude that they were good and soft?"
"That aside!" I hold up a finger! "...Historically, guys get the instinct ta desire them 'cause like, normally big ones would mean a lotta milk for a kid." This feels weird to talk about! "Not that most actually consciously think along those lines. Same thing with hip size, and uh… probably other features, but I dunno!" There's probably some more historical logic that I don't really care about!
"...I su- suppose, that makes sense." Genkan looks a little embarrassed that she asked! "Humans are quite… reproductive, aren't they?"
I have no idea what that actually means in context to things that're inhuman!
Shoof. Anyway, we move up to the front door of the shrine, an' slide it open.
Sanae's just on the other side, looking really smug!
"...You." Genkan steps up to her! "Why do humans reproduce?" Uh oh.
...Sanae smiles wider, and blinks! "Oo- or we'd die?"
...Genkan looks down. "That's-... that wasn't an intelligent question, was it…?"
"Maybe not!" Turnin' around, Sanae moves back inside! "We actually do have a chess board!" Was she just eavesdroppin'...!?
"Let me rephrase that." Genkan continues with her own line of thinking! "...What drives the carnal desire of reproduction in humans? Necessity aside."
...Pausing, Sanae smiles back at her! "Why do you get embarrassed about wearing such a sexy outfit? If sex concepts didn't apply to you, there wouldn't be a problem, would there? So, you might have more desire than you think, yourself."
...Genkan just looks away! "I'm… not sure if they're quite the same. But, they're probably similar. I probably just don't know why my sisters do some of the things they do."
There's a tiny little bookshelf in the back-left of the main shrine room here, an' Sanae goes for it. Aw, she has a cheapo boxed chess set, for some reason.
"Don't yer sisters rape dudes sometimes?" I feel like I remember that! "So, they might get them urges."
"...Potentially. That might make sense." Genkan agrees! "Of course, they'd swear otherwise." Yeah, well, if Shimokoa's any indicator… I dunno about that! "For the most part, the satiation of pleasure is an occasional… sisterly bonding activity, and doesn't involve reproduction. Such is why I wondered, why humans associate pleasure with reproduction."
...At that, Sanae beams big, bringin' the worn box over to the kotatsu in the room's center! "We~ll. Considering how it works… it might be more accurate ta say that reproduction's not actually the topic. But, I dunno." She looks at me! "When you jack off, do you think a' impregnating girls?" Aaa~h!
"...Only sometimes!" This conversation's weird, dude! "An'-... y'know, if I'm jackin' off, then it's not even with the intention ta follow-through." Arousal's a weird mix of like, unexplainable carnal fascinations. Of any interest, it's almost pretend to give that sorta thing a rational explanation.
The main endgame level of explaining sexual interest usually boils down to like, 'might've been a common practice, might just be an unexplainable fascination, who knows'. The big fetishes usually have biological logic or cultural backing, the little ones just kinda exist.
cla- cla- clack. Sanae gently folds open the box, and chess pieces splay out across the table.
"When did we start talking about masturabation…?" Genkan's compacted a little, again!
Sanae's faced is slightly flushed, too! "I'm pretty sure you started it, somehow!"
"Then, I'm ending it." She began to sit down at the kotatsu, before lookin' down, and taking care of the fact her chest's slightly bigger than it should be!
I sit down next to her, at the next kotatsu side. Ho~h…
"The fact you two can talk about it so casually, though…" Sanae gives us a skeptical look!
"I dunno if I'd call it casual!" We're all in a vague state of awkwardness, which is a strange and new territory!
...Lookin' down at the pieces, I pick up the kings, an' place them in their places!
Except, I only put the kings in place. "The board is prepared, yo."
"Nn- no it's not…!" Sanae objected!
"No." Despite her half-nakedness, Genkan smiled. "...I trust Brad, here. If he says the board is prepared, then surely, it most certainly is. So…" She looks over at me! "What do we do from here, with only these two pieces?"
"We move 'em at each other!" It's time to Chess, son. "But kings can only move one space at a time!"
"...I see." Genkan nods, dude. "Then…"
She moved her king one space!
We both rapidly move our kings closer to one another, one space at a time, until Genkan tips over my king with hers.
"I won." Genkan monotoned…! "Chess makes me want to cry."
"Cr- cry…?" Sanae's chucklin'! "That wasn't Chess…!"
I remove the kings from the board, and place two pawns, one black and one white, on either side. "These are pawns!"
"I know the names of a majority of these pieces." Genkan makes her knowledge known, dude. "Pawn, bishop, king, queen… knight, and rook." The last two took slightly more effort than the others…
"They can only move forward." I supply, referrin' to the pawns. "An' they can only diagonally attack!"
"...That reminds me of you, for some reason." Genkan compares my combat usefulness to a pawn…! "Well, then."
She moves her pawn forward! We're positioned in a way that whoever gets the good turn can just ass fuck the other piece.
Again, we have a very brief an' eventful back and forth, racing our pawns into the center, and hers ends up jumping my piece again!
Genkan snorts! "Perhaps the game should be renamed 'pawns' or something similar."
Then, she looks down at her own chest again, distracted by herself! Every time she moved a piece, her chest slightly jiggled. Or, more like swayed. She also seems slightly annoyed by how her elbow keeps hitting her boob by accident!
Provided, boobs are not as freakin' explosive as they are in anime. Somehow, that makes this hotter…! Probably 'cause the slight sway is realistic, aside from the fact she's sittin' right here next to me. So fuckin' soft-
That's enough oglin' her! Next, I put the bishops on the board. I made sure that mine was on a black tile, and hers was on a white tile, 'cause this means there's literally no way for us to kill each other…!
"What're you guys doing." Sanae just now asks this!
"Bishops!" That's what we're doin'! "We're playin' Bishops an' ladders, son."
"I have no idea how these go, actually." Genkan has never played Chess even remotely!
"Bishops can move forever." They're broken. "Except, only diagonally!" They're not so broken!
"Ooh." Genkan looks interested!
She moves her piece way into the board! An' I do the same!
...We keep moving them at extreme lines and angles for a few seconds, before Genkan realizes the obvious! "This game's never going to end. We can't hurt each other."
"Uh oh." Help.
...After I leave my piece alone, she breaks the rules an' drags hers across the board to tip it over for no reason!
I think knights are the most 'what the fuck' of the pieces, next to freakin' castling, which still feels slightly like cheating to me! I pro'lly won't show her castling 'cause I don't even remember how it goes half the time.
Now ta place the knights, or as I like ta call 'em, horses. I dunno any clever way to set them up, they're too freakin' unwieldy.
"Horses." Genkan reaches the same conclusion!
"A horse is a horse of course, dude." They're very broad pieces, son. "These… can go through other pieces, and uh, like-... they move in an oddly specific L-pattern, like this." I move my knight in the four tile L shape!
"Through pieces?" Genkan wonders! "...That implies no other piece can do that."
"Yeah, they can't." The entire army is in its own way! "S'probably to offset the fact that this thing is weird."
Genkan roughly replicates the way I moved the knight. Aw...
"Also, by L-shaped, I really mean it!" I move the horse in like, the one of a couple ways you can do it. An L-shape has a surprisin' amount a' options!
"Aah. It is literal, then." Genkan gets it, yo.
...We abstractly move the knights closer to one another, and end up having to really try to get them to fight each other!
fwi- fwish. Eventually, Genkan makes really tiny glacier blades under the both of them, when we somehow make the horses move too far away from each other.
The daylight outside starts ta dim, and a cool shade overtakes the shrine. Aw…
I put the rooks on the board! "These move forever, forward an' backward!"
Click. Genkan instantly annihilates my rook wit' hers!
Finally, we're down to the queens, dude.
"These…" They're pointy, dude. "They move all." Yes, dude.
"All." Genkan echoes, as I place 'em down! "...So, you can just put them anywhere, or attack anything. That feels like cheating."
"Well-... not quite that!" That does sound like a cool idea, though! "They go forever in lines, and diagonals. Sadly, ya can't just make a super L or something wit' 'em..."
"Ah." She looked down at the board, where I put the queens directly diagonal of each other.
She moves one down an entire side, so I do the same along a whole different edge of the board!
Eventually, she makes her queen flee backwards to try and cut me off at the next corner. But then, I move mine diagonally, and finally tip her piece over!
"Oh." She expresses the vaguest amount of surprise. Wahaha, son.
"Are you guys actually gonna play Chess now…?" Sanae's got her arms folded!
"I think so!" I grin back at 'er!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
It is now completely dark out. The spooky tubby fluffles are roaming, dude…
Neither me or Genkan are really good at Chess, so this game's kinda been one confusing strategic decision after another!
"This really is like Shogi, except simpler, and perhaps worse." Genkan agrees with me! "But, I thought you didn't know much of Shogi?"
"I don't, but…" I know a little! "I had ta play it once or twice, and it reminds me a lot more of some modern game design choices made by games way in the future! Like-... specifically, the fact you can redeploy stuff in Shogi reminds me a' all the strategy games that came out that let you make new units. Especially Advance Wars…!"
You know, Advance Wars was made by a Japanese company- Nintendo- wasn't it? I wonder if it was inspired by Shogi. And, it's called the 'Wars series' 'cause-
"Advance Wars?" Exploding my internal thoughts, Genkan raised a brow! "...That doesn't quite sound like either Chess or Shogi." Y'know, both games probably have a multi-thousand year difference in release date compared to Advance Wars…!
I must relay what I know of its history! "Every game in its series is actually like, named after the console it was released on. Startin' with Super Famicom Wars, an' if it was ever released in my country, it woulda been, uh… Nintendo Entertainment System Wars. A real mouthful!"
"Entertainment System Wars." Genkan echoes a part of the title! "That does sound quaint."
Sadly, the Wars series games slowed when Waifu Emblem took off. Freakin'... Waifu Emble~m…
We'd hafta have a really cozy off-day to play strategy stuff, and probably a computer with an emulator! 'Cause those games took awhile to play, even longer than Chess or Shogi, I'm sure!
We've already murdered eachother's queens. I've got a bishop and the king left, an' she's got a rook and a king. It's not looking really good in general!
...Sanae meanders by, bringing us cups of kool-aid! "Ooh. Looks like it's almost over, huh."
"We won." Genkan says something confusing! "But, we were also the losers." Uh oh…!
"Yeah." Sanae agrees! "Wait, what."
...She sets down the kool-aid on the kotatsu, while we idly try and out-maneuver each other! We're not super successful.
"I find it mildly surprising that you're not good at these sort of games." Genkan admitted!
But, y'know… "I just kinda hate Chess, to be honest!" It's a thing to play, but y'know… I basically like Chess matches like these the best. There's an element of practice to improving, but also like… against certain people, it's sheer memorization of the freakin' algorithms one can use from certain scenarios.
Like, there's a level of practice and being used to the game, but also some people just… have formulaic memory of literally everything you can do in Chess, which really puts me off from it.
Maybe I just don't get Chess in particular! Raa~h!
"You dislike it?" Genkan grins! "Why'd you suggest we play it?"
"I don't particularly hate playing against other people who're new at it, 'cause it's kind of a fresh thing to us both." I break down my thinking, yo. "Against practiced people, it's a trial in memorizin' things, and a trial in who practiced more. There's probably somethin' I don't get about the resource management too, but y'know… this is why I think I'd like Shogi a lot more. It plays into things I'm already kinda-but-not-really strong at!"
Basically, the moment I found out Shogi was a thing and you could redeploy pieces and stuff, it instantly felt like… I dunno, more innovative, and the concept seemed funner to me. Which, in turn, made me kinda look down on Chess for not being like that. But Chess isn't a bad game, and is super its own thing, but I dunno.
...We just both stare at what's essentially a draw.
Genkan slides from her seat! "I might agree, if only because Chess does feel like a step back, to me. I do like how the pieces are carved." Ooh. Yeah, I always liked how they looked!
We both stand up, and claim the kool-aid cups. Ho~h…
"Hey." Sanae heckles us! "You guys gonna stay the night? Or, are ya gonna get moving?"
…'Cause of our recent sleepin' habits, I'm not really tired.
Genkan wants to delay the inevitable awkward clusterfuck that bed's gonna be! "I think we'll keep moving, through the evening. When we decide to leave, that is."
"Ooh!" Sanae romps off! "Follow me, guys!"
So we do! She moves quickly through the back a' the main room, into the dim inner-shrine hallway, then to her door.
Shoof. She slides the door open. Inside, we can hear the horde!
They're still playin' Smash Bros in here, but uh-
"Nn- nnh…" Ha-chan squirms, sittin' in uh, Maria's lap. They're in the same position me an' Genkan were, and Maria's trying to play past Ha-chan!
"Uu- fnh…" Maria huffs, when Ha-chan shoves her chest in her face.
Iku's got her arms folded, sittin' next to Tenshi, who's really trying to get into it! Guess Iku wasn't about that lap-sittin' life…!
Oh, here's where Kanako an' Suwako were. Suwako's trying to play, but Kanako's just in her lap- and the size disparity is pretty huge! "This isn't fa~ir!" Suwako whines!
"...You people." Genkan's kinda taken aback! "This shrine is seriously perverted."
"I um, don't think that's a bad thing." Sanae has my style of thinking, dude. "But! Uh, 'fore you guys run off- I kinda thought you'd be spending the night here, so…!"
She runs over to her bed, and slides open a drawer under the night stand, and takes somethin' out…
"Here!" Sanae- that- "Unless you guys already got some…" She looks around to make sure no one else is looking at us! Thankfully, they're all distracted wit' each other.
It's an unopened box a' condoms. There's a happy Nitori on the front, giving us a thumbs-up!
"...What are these?" Genkan-... oh. Oh. Genkan- are ya joking.
...Sanae gazes into the distance, awed.
Lookin' over the box, Genkan furrows her brows. "Wait. These-... condoms…!?" Oh. So, she does know!
"Oo- oh, ye- yeah." Refocusing, Sanae blushes a little! "We're leading the production of some things, and that was one of the first necessities we're having produced. I, um, haven't personally used 'em-... so, if you could give us some feedback after you, you know…"
"I-..." Genkan looks at me! She looks along herself, before realizing she didn't have a kimono on, so she couldn't just hide it! "...Br- Brad. Hold- onto these for now, I guess…" She gives me the box!
...I carefully put it away into the bag!
...Sanae looks at the awkward exchange, and grins! "You two are really cute together!"
"Ye- yeah…" Genkan doesn't deny that, either! "I just-..." Then, she sighs.
She pivots to me, and-
"Mmh." She steps up to me, and gives me a peck on the lips, all of a sudden.
It's amazing seeing her so close, and like, kissing her. I'm sure my face reddens like instantly.
After a moment, she backs off, ta see my reaction. "Aa- aah." Now it's my turn to be flustered and confused…! She's just- holy shit-
"Actually! Idea~..." Sanae slinks along aside us! "Does Maria there know any good protection magic?"
...Genkan reacts! "If- if you mean to say contraceptive magic, I'll have you know- we're not-"
"I meant physical an' magical defense." Sanae beamed at her! "I'm not that much of a pervert!"
"...Sor- sorry." Genkan apologized, snug style. "And-... not really." She knows this magic attack buff that she hasn't used in awhile. Maybe I should remind her about it! Not that anyone but her has many magic attacks that scale well…
"If ya stuck around for tomorrow, I'd be able to show her a thing or two, maybe!" Sanae proposed! "...Or, have Lady Suwako show 'em a thing or two! But, I think I'm pretty good at the necessities. I'm well-rounded!" Was- that a pun a' some sort-
Hmm. Maybe… or, idea!
I raise a finger! "We're plannin' on stoppin' by Reimu's place!"
Sanae changes gears immediately! "I'm comin' with you!" Aw, yes dude! Oh, man. I bet Reimu's gonna love getting a party of horny people at her front door in the middle of the evening! I wonder when we'll even get there.
...We look over at the entourage of people! I mean, it's just another four people there, plus me an' Sanae which makes three, meaning we'd literally be a party of eight.
"Hey, guys!" Sanae rounds up everyone, 'cause she really wants to harass Reimu tonight, too! "That means everyone! We're gonna all head out soon, so come here when your game is done!"
"Aah-..." Tenshi gets up, and looks suspicious of us all! "Why?"
"Shrine's closed!" Sanae lies! "...Actually, we're all gonna go bother Reimu!"
...Tenshi nods in approval! "I've wanted to do that for awhile now, actually." Aw…
Maria looks back at us, her face really red! "Aa- aa-"
fwump. Ha-chan pushes her over, and she gets smushed. "Nnh."
"Uu- ah." Suwako looked over at us, from Kanako's embrace…! "Alrightie, then!"
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Sanae's the kool-aid dispensary, I got Deep Blue out ta fill up the pitcher she's carryin', and yeah!
Everyone else is around. We're walkin' down the great murder mountain, except there's so many of us that if we got jumped by anyone, we'd literally just counter-jump them and instantly party-wipe them.
The trail is kinda rough and threatens to annihilate our ankles, but it's at least downward, so we don't have to kill ourselves trying to climb anything! That, and double- and triple jumps- come in kinda handy just to bridge bigger mediocre drops.
Yes, dude. This is the true utility of multiple mediocre jumps: recreational hiking. Even just this would turn me into some kinda deity-like hiking legend on the outside!
Also, there is a lot of snow on the mountain trail!
shoo- shoo- shoof. Genkan's trailing ahead of us with Maria, holding her arms out and makin' the snow part biblical style. If y'know, Moses worked on front lawns…!
Small snowballs roll down the dark mountain trail ahead a' us, all of the telekinetically pushed snow balling up to neatly get outta our way.
"Hey, Genkan." Next ta her, Maria holds out her time staff, and the tip's got some smoulderin' flames on it, lighting our way. "...I just realized something."
"Hmm?" Genkan gives her a ginger look, dude.
...Also, she has a tight red sweater on, now! Her cow girl bra bikini thing is still on under it, so her chest is still fluffier than usual.
"You guys shoulda rolled a really big snowball, last time it snowed." Aw. Maria's right, dude.
Genkan processes this… "We did make a tower."
"That's true." Maria softly confirmed... "But, it's not a really big snowball."
"...You're right." Genkan looked around, an' stuff. "Perhaps it would still be possible, if we went into a field and found sheets of untapped snow." It has only been like what, a day after it snowed, basically?
Genkan's regular kimono is in my outfit for safekeeping, son. Also, so is the freakin'... copy of Sanae's outfit!
"You guys should." Sanae looked peaceful, dude. "That sounds like fun…"
"Been there, done that." Tenshi exists.
Iku looks like she's sleepin' as she floats along with us, just kinda drifting along, at the same pace Genkan is.
The sky is a little blue towards where the sun sat, but the sky's dark and mysterious in the opposite direction. Night is overtaking the land, son. It's a really fun gradient! I wanna explore the sky, dude...
Ho~h. Actually, y'know what…
"We should do that right now, dude!" I look away from the pitcher I was fillin' up with Deep Blue!
"I'm sure the kappa would appreciate being avalanched by a huge oncoming snowball." Genkan criticizes my idea…! "Knowing them, we'd get literally blown up over it."
Fortunately- or perhaps unfortunately- things have de-escalated a little. As in, me and Genkan aren't about to literally just smash our faces together in intense mutual sexual frustration.
The sun's long since set, and now we're in the really dark and cold evening. Sanae's got a big fluffy coat on, and-
"Achoo!" Ha-chan is freezin' her fairy tits off! "Wh- wha~y… ish it sho khoo~ld!"
"Ge- geez…" Sanae gives her a worried look! "I know you're a fairy and all, but I can't help but feel a little bad…!"
"Freakin'..." I reach into my bag! "Actually. Yo, Genkan, do ya mind if I toss yer kimono onto Ha-chan?"
"Yes, because she might get lost." Genkan retorted! "And, thereby, my kimono would get lost." ...She's right, too! Oof!
"Ahahaha~nh…" Ha-chan laughs in cold agony! I thought she even had her own coat thing, too! "Ih- khan't fheel my finghers…"
"Sakuya!" I yell! "World, cooling, stop!"
...Sanae snapped her fingers! "Oh, yeah! She's from the mansion, isn't she?"
"Ee!" Ha-chan went E. "Ah!" Ah!
voom. Tenshi holds out her spooky scarlet energy sword. An' then-
VRR- VRRR! She revs it up, and it glows brighter, and warmer!
Ha-chan gets really close to it, shivering a whole bunch. She's really snug when she's suffering from hypothermia, dude.
...All I got fer heat is the freakin' Red Scare, and that thing's a hazard in more ways than one! Don't think I'll be whippin' that out.
"Y'kno~w…" Sanae grins at me! Uh oh! "Why don't you have a cute nickname for Genkan? Like, Gen-chan? Kan-chan? Genk?" Genk. Gonkan…!
"...I dunno." I look at Genkan as I say this! "Callin' Hana, 'Ha-chan' was a spur of the moment thing that happened a while ago that stuck. I'm from the west, so suffixes aren't really in my nature to say!"
"...But, you use them right a good portion of the time." Genkan supplies! Woah no.
I shake my head! "If I've ever said -san or -sama or -sensei or anything like that, it is one hundred ten percent the border of language filling in the blanks with tone or somethin'. I think I've only ever used -chan intentionally, when referrin' to Ha-chan!"
"...That's very difficult to wrap my head around." Genkan admits! "Wait. Where you come from, there aren't honorifics, then? How do you address-... hnnh." Aaa~h, aa~h!
"Y'see-...!" It's a long story, son. "We got some specific prefixes, but for the most part we just don't. Particularly stiff places go by just last name for things… but, we consider that the high end a' formalities. Like, we don't consider someone's first name somethin' sacred; we consider it pretty much trash-tier in formality, and-... there's not much personal sacredness to it, either!"
"Then-... what do you do in relationships?" Maria wondered!
"We just use regular names, or some cute nicknames!" I provide! "...My parents called eachother mom an' dad 'cause that's what kid me called 'em, and that stuck for like, awhile."
Maria nods! "...Yeah, that seems right."
"Does it?" Genkan is not as west-oriented as Maria!
fwi~sh. A cold wind cuts across the dark, snowy mountainside, dude.
"Nnn~h…" Ha-chan shivers violently! Like- oof…! "So~... co~ld!"
Sanae takes off her own scarf! "Ge- geez! Here…!" You may or may not regret that, but I'm kinda thankful! I probably shoulda-... hmm. Do I have anything other than what I'm wearing right now that's actually warm? Reimu outfit, nazi outfit… Kaguya's dress might count.
"I'd thought it weird," Genkan brings up, "when you'd interchanged Maria and Maria." Uh. I think the suffixes got eaten!
I ask for help! "I heard that as Maria and Maria!"
"...Maybe we should stop." Uh oh. Genkan was intimidated by the border of language…!
Aw. I know what I should do, dude- I should give Ha-chan a snuggle for warmth-
An' then, in the snow before us, there's a pair of whitish-grey eyes that look up at us.
"Aa-" Maria instantly locks up! "There's- someone there…"
"Aah." Genkan looks down at herself! "I sensed them. It's just a passing-... ah." Yes, dude, the passin' ah.
Suddenly, there are more eyes! Most of them are a muted color, some variant of grey or a muted tone like a whitish yellow or whitish red.
"Hu~h." Sanae began to float forward, before stoppin'. "Hey, hold this." Turnin' to me, she gave me the kool-aid pitcher!
"Ye." Aw…
Then, in the light made by Maria's fire, the eyes come forward to reveal their true forms!
And, the first guy we see is just that one grey wolf guy, who got traumatized on the mountain by Suwako last chapter. It seems like he's brought friends!
"I see." Genkan tilted her head back. "It's the more traditional generation of beast youkai. They seem to not be here for pleasantries." Y'think, yo…
"Yeah." The long-haired pretty boy in front tilted his head back, too. "I don't know what the hell it was you were pulling earlier, but it fuckin' pissed us off."
"Hey, uh…" A guy wit' straight brown hair turned to him! "You- sure we should-... like- that's the Moriya chick, there. And-" He pointed vaguely in our direction! "I'm pretty sure that celestial started an incident, or somethin'..."
There's like six of them, but four of them are standin' really far away...
"...Y'know what I think?" The long-haired guy sneered back at him! "I think that's the idea. They just wanna fuckin' scare us. None a' them are really there, it's like, illusion magic. I bet only that asshole is there." He points at me!
"Daa~h." I dunno about that, son…! "They're puttin' things in the water, son. They're turnin' the frogs gay…!" I gesture to the kool-aid! And- Suwako was totally being gay with Kanako earlier! I missed out on a chance to make a perfectly good 'gay frogs' meme joke!
...It's also 2015, so that meme shouldn't even- yeah I'll just shut up…!
"...Kokei- I dunno." The brown-haired wolf guy stepped back, a little! "They smell pretty real to me, man."
Sanae floats forward, and raises her gohei! "Protectaga!"
FWI- FWASH! Wo- woah, holy shit! A triforce-like symbol flares in the air before her, and then-
FWI- FWI- FWI- FWI- FWI- FWISH! Bright, yellow orbs of protective energy appear around just everyone in our party.
"Oo- ooh…" Genkan looks down at herself, now that she's brightly illuminated! "This- magic…!"
"Aeroga!" Sanae spun around in the air-
FWI- FWI- FWI- FWI- FWISH! Shields of wind energy flare up around all of us, too! Do these both like- halve damage, each? Sanae just made us all literally fuckin' invincible…!
The grey-haired pretty boy looks back at his posse, ta see that a good number of them have just left…! "Ugh- ya fucking- assholes!" He flails an arm back in their direction! "You just don't get it!"
"It's so- coohohold!" The wind shield makes Ha-chan hate life…! "Aaa~h!"
Snow billows around all of us just for standing here, 'cause these are really intimidating shields we have on…!
Floatin' down towards the wolf guy, Sanae just smiles, as she gets closer to him…!
WOOSH. Once in range, he lunged forward, to slam his arm wide into her.
FWISHTING! Sanae literally only flinched like a little, and then the two shields sent the guy off a' his freakin' legs. "Ngh- aah!"
Crunch! He landed in the snow some meters ahead, diggin' his bare feet into it! "You-... who the hell are you!?"
Sanae just is casual. "You don't know? That's kinda…"
"Not you." He points at me again! "You. Trickmaster!" Wh- dfuh.
"Destroy the fluffle." I speak words of the deep state, son.
...Lookin' back at us with an intense grin, she looks back down at the single wolf guy! "I can assure you, we're more than real. I mean-... my barriers hit you, with wind and non-elemental stuff. How real can you get?"
"Anyone can cast magic." The guy- Kokei, was he- really didn't wanna believe! "Show me something only the gods could do."
...Sanae looks really hype, all of a sudden! "Ooh!" She looks back at us! "...Should I show off!? I dunno…"
"Ye~s!" Tenshi bellowed! "If you don't smite him, I will!" Wau…!
"Alright…" Sanae floated back a few meters, and held her arms out, her gohei floatin' away from herself. "Then, I'll show you all… why I'm a symbol of peace and justice!"
Drifting higher into the air, she spread her whole body. "Gods!"
fwi- fwish. A gale suddenly begins ta spin around the clearing, as Kanako and Suwako suddenly descend from above…!
"Ho, hum." Kanako had her arms folded! "...Really, now."
"Awh." Suwako grinned down! "A level one crook. Really, Sanae…"
"He- hey…" Sanae waved her arms at them! "This should stop any more stupid encounters for like, the next week or so!"
"Fair enough!" Suwako drifted down for her form, as did Kanako.
KRZT- FZZT! Amber and airy emerald began to wash offa' Sanae's form, as the two gods entered her body.
KRA- KRAKROOM. The ground meters below Sanae cracked the moment they passed into her, and the light and air around her body itself began to bend. Hohohoh…!
Kokei the level one wolfman stumbled back, and brought up his arms! "You're not the only one with tricks! Coat of Arms!"
Shing! His arms turned to steel- or something like that- and the metal spread out, as if protecting him! "With an iron defense, not even the tengu can fuck with me real easy!"
Sanae rotated in the air, as if takin' in the sensation of being overgod. Her eyes were pinpricks of gold light, and her whole form seemed vague amidst the energy and sheer atmospheric pressure…!
Then, Sanae held her arm out towards 'em.
ti- tink, clack. From her left arm, she held out a single vine, that grew out and unfurled into the air almost too fast for me to tell what was goin' on.
About instantly, Kokei's metal arms just super rust, and begin falling apart…!
"Aa-" He looked down, and his jaw dropped! "The fuck-"
"I know starting conflict is in a youkai's nature…" Sanae spoke, and it kinda echoed! "But the ones with true strength knew how to pick their battles."
WOOSH. Sanae floated forward, towards the ground, and the soil beneath her began to levitate into the air just from her getting close to it!
"What-" Joggin' backwards, he looks up with wide eyes! "Oh no!" Freakin'- 'oh no'...!? Yeah- 'oh no' is right…!
Then, Sanae, Kanako and Suwako all speak at once, it sounds like! "MISSOURI…"
WHOOM. He tries ta turn around, but then Sanae's snapped ahead. She's got her left arm held out, as if ta punch straight through him, but she passed entirely by him instead.
"SMASH!" Sanae flicked her arm back, and the soft side of her left palm pecked the back a' Kokei's neck, her limb glowing a bright amber.
THUD- BOOM! Kokei just immediately faceplanted right into the rocky mountainside soil. The love-tap freakin' annihilated him.
...I think all his friends just left. Not a bad idea!
After lookin' around, Sanae slouched-
woosh. Then, the gods popped outta her, floatin' back into the air!
"Missouri." Kanako sneered down at her…! "Of all states."
...Now normal and fluffy again, Sanae half-grinned up at her! "I mean-... you can't deny, it fits the backwards palm poke. And I thought that was real cool!"
"I wonder how that'd work, if it was actually riding off miracle power…" Suwako smiled tiredly into the air. "Then again…"
"I didn't wanna freakin' kill him…!" Sanae beamed back! "And I don't want Reimu ta sniff us out from a mile away. 'Cause if we turn from here to her shrine into tornado alley, she's probably gonna know…!"
...Suwako turned to Kanako! "Back ta totally-not-gay Smash?"
Kanako shut her eyes! "Could you not be that blunt, in public."
fwish. They both just poof away.
...Sanae looks back at us, and romps up! "What'd you guys think!?"
"All Might versus a fluffle." I know where you stole that attack name from, Sanae…!
I just realized. Kanako and Suwako are Sanae's Fairy God Parents. Uh oh, son.
"Gods… are spooky." Maria had little to verbally add!
"I've never been in the presence of magic signatures so profound." Genkan summarized! "...But, it wasn't unexpected, everything considered." I have a feeling we've become perhaps too hard to displace…!
Oh, yeah. The extreme visual clutter shields of super shielding faded out at some point, too. Probably 'cause none of us were in danger of getting pinged ta begin with.
"Yo- Sanae!" That reminds me! "What's Montana Smash look like…!? How 'bout Hawaii Smash?" Oregon Smash!
"Why- those states…?" Sanae totally doesn't have those! "Gimme time! 'Cause, I don't usually get a lotta excuses to go full power..."
Maine Smash, the one where you slowly freeze your opponent to death, because everyone's dead in the north east.
Hoh. Aw- wait, that reminds me, somehow. Maybe I should-
Oh. Ha-chan's plight has been solved. Iku has wrapped her fluffy raiment scarf thing around her like a cocoon, and now Ha-chan looks really snug.
za- zap, zap. Ooh, Iku's even fryin' Ha-chan! Which is good, since Ha-chan eats volts like a turned-off Wiimote eats double-As!
"Coulda been more overkill." Tenshi is hard to please, son. "Eight out of ten, I guess."
"Unh." Sanae gave the deflated Kokei guy a casual stare. "Well, that's too bad." Unh, son.
...Wait- wasn't Kokei named Yoshi? I dunno, with a name like Yoshi, I'd go around calling myself somethin' else too!
Wait, I'm thinking of that celestial guy with the viper staff. Freakin', the level one crooks all blend together…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
That line break only covered like, ten feet, by the way. Somethin' new came up right away!
Not too far from where we were meandering, there's a tiny little house to the left of the path.
"Oo- oh, yeah." Sanae recognizes it immediately! "I forgot the ten million reasons people don't take this path up to the shrine."
Uh oh. "What's that, yo…"
"That's 'cause they can't read the signs."
Oh! Nemuno walks out from some foliage near the tiny house! I thought I recognized that tiny structure. "This here's ma' territory." Mom territory. "...Aw, hol' on, wait."
She quickly meanders up to us! "There's a lotta ya. And-..." She moves for Genkan in particular! "You two're still travelin' together? You even still got the little magic girl wit' you. S'been nearly a week!"
"Hi, crazy mountain lady!" Sanae gets in between them, and waves at her! "I'm still not gonna tell you to move, but I'm also still gonna tell you to stop being the hiking police!"
"Hold on." Genkan cools her down, dude. "We know her."
...Sanae blinks! "Aa- ya do? ...I guess youkai would be familiar, with one another…"
"I don't normally ever meet yamanba, but she helped us out once." Genkan delivered plainly… "That said, I may have forgotten her name."
Nemuno weaved past Sanae, steppin' closer! "Ahw, no big deal, I forgot yer names too. Sprinkles, was it? Y'still mean ta tell me ya ain't shacked up with-... Bobby up there?" That is the worst corruption of my name yet…!
Sprinkles and Bobby adventures, dude. "Sp- Sprinkles?" Genkan looked bewildered…!
shoo- shoof. Ha-chan shuffled up to Nemuno, looking really snug in her scarf-thing wrapping…
...Nemuno gives her a confused look! "What the hell is she."
"Fluff ro~ll." Sanae smiled broadly.
"Um…" Maria speaks up! "They- um, actually did- become boyfriend, and girlfriend…"
...At that, Nemuno lit up! "Oh, holy shit! Did they fuck yet!?"
...Genkan just kinda frowns at her! An' Nemuno grins back... "Loosen u~p. Literally, even!" Uh oh! "I dunno why you're both hypin' this up so much!"
"I- I mean…" Even Sanae's a little intimidated to approach the conversation! "Have you ever been in love?"
Nemuno leaned back. "Eeh. Somethin' like it, a few times, pro'lly." Whaddaya mean probably. "I'm just sayin', yer blueballin' yourselves somethin' hard! I mean, look at ya!" She shifts up ta Genkan…!
Reachin' forward, she pulls on the hem a' Genkan's red sweater! "This sweater's probably got 'em horny all the damn time, s'like you're tryin'a play him- did yer boobs get bigger?"
"...Things happened." Genkan summarized!
Tenshi stomps forward! "We made her put on a bikini that made her boobs bigger, and then made her stand in front of him without a shirt on. And they still haven't fucked."
Nemuno shakes her head somethin' fierce, leanin' back like she was staggered! "Wha~t… man. You people! Yer confusing, lemme tell you…!"
"Li- likewise." Genkan begins her tiny offensive! "We-... both, have our reasons…"
"Yeah, yeah." Nemuno waves 'er off. This is a weird conversation to be having in the frosty-ass gloom of the night…! "Anyway, if you lot keep goin' down from here, yer gonna wind up in the kappa."
"Yeah." Sanae knows! "I mean- our shrine deals with them. We'd know…!"
Nemuno nods at 'er! "Oh, yeah, you. I think I 'member you, from a while ago. You traveled with uu~h… Rimjob an' Melissa, an' those other chucklefucks."
"Rei- Rimjob and Melissa." Sanae echoed…! "That first one was on purpose… and- how could you not know about me!? We're like, the biggest political entity on the mountain!"
"Ya probably said that to me last time!" Nemuno guesstimated! "An' that's exactly why! ...Provided, the place has been crowded, as a' late…"
sniff, sniff. Uh oh. The foliage behind Nemuno shifts, an' she suddenly draws her huge butcher knife-
From under the stick-like brush, a large fluffle comes from the snow stuff, giving us all a little look. "im a swiffer" Uh oh. "sniff sniff"
"Sniff, sniff." Ha-chan quietly repeated…
shunk. Nemuno lamely lops it with her cleaver, and the fluffle only slightly recoils…!
"ill sniff you out" It looked up at Nemuno, and came closer, shell nose pointed up.
shunk- RIP- shunk! She flails it at it a few more times, until it collapses into dust and snow! "Speakin' a crowded- these things keep spookin' all the wild animals! You ever try jumpin' a deer- only for these assholes ta leap out at it and make as much noise as fuckin' possible…!?"
Gensokyo had deer?
...I turn ta Genkan! "We should hunt deer!" I didn't even know until now…!
"We would not be successful." She decides outright! "Neither of us have the discipline for such a thing. Unless I simply froze the deer in place, but that's on the implication that your mere existence wouldn't alert it." Wau.
"Ah, yeah." Nemuno looks like she's realized somethin'. "Lotta you either don't eat or just trade with the people who can actually do the huntin'. The hell do half of you even do all day?"
Tenshi sensed opportunity! "Be bored."
"Perform social work." Iku repeated Tenshi's answer!
"...Fol- follow Brad?" Maria grinned!
"...Stuff." Sanae probably plays video games on the most of any given off-day…! "Shrine stuff. Like, prayer, and uh… yeah."
"Those all sound the same ta me!" Nemuno cares not for our life of boondoggling, son. "Scre~w that."
"Right?" Foldin' her arms, her sword de-igniting, Tenshi gazed up into the star-filled, grey-ish night sky.
...Genkan slowly looks over at her, before collecting her energy. "Yet, you followed us."
"...It's something other than just being bored." Tenshi justified!
"It's also social interaction." Iku helped her out! "Which, the eldest daughter doesn't get a lot of. I mean that in terms of total healthy interactions. As in, fighting people notwithstanding."
The night sky does look pretty nice, dude. All those stars!
shoo- shoof. In the quiet, the fluffle that Nemuno killed reforms, and smiles up at us. "its me fluffle" It called itself a fluffle, too!
shunk, shunk. Nemuno began casually lopping away at it again…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
We stroll into kappa territory. We didn't stick with Nemuno for too long, ultimately!
It's still the dead a' night, and pale white-ish light is cast all over Gensokyo from the intensity of the stars, and the snow.
I don't think I've ever stopped near the kappa-... like, for any length of time, really! If I have at all…!
The village setup down here is… well, it's not a village, basically. It's more like a bazaar, with really heavily fortified sheds.
A bridge runs across the river in the midst, and that river cuts the dirt road through the 'village' right down the middle.
KABAM- chik, chik! Ahead of us, someone fires a shotgun into the sky, and we see emerald pellets roar up into the sea of stars.
PATATATAT! A stream of gold lines is drawn into the sky to our right, somewhere! Must be danmaku…?
Bleak industrial lights line the sheds and the dirt paths, remindin' me of outside world gas stations and warehouses.
The path leads us to a little stone stairway down towards a junction of paths, at the foot a' the mountain here. Most paths probably just lead to less interesting places of the bazaar, bu~t…
fwi~sh. To our left, there's a big waterfall thing in the distance! There's bleak industrial lights shining on the waterfall itself, illuminating the diamond-like rush of falling drops.
We soon reach the closest stretch of the bazaar, an' hear the chitter-chatter of idle kappa dudes and dudettes.
"Better not snow again. Flammable gas munition is annoying…"
"It's a good time to get materials for ice rays and guns!"
"Crystal arm for sale! Fifty million yen! Made from the shards of a real crystal hydra!" What. Holy shit.
"These things really are our retarded cousins." Wat. Aw…
I look to the right, and near two mats lined with metal parts, a black-haired kappa guy is holding up a fluffle.
"meager maker" The fluffle in his arms speaks…!
A red-haired kappa girl standing across from him at her own carpet thing grins. "They really are. Like-... they can make stuff, they-... would like to swim, and those little fin things are cute."
He sets down the fluffle, which is half his size, for some reason!
...It walks over an' up to us. "hi im kappa" More like the alpha version…!
Tenshi crouches down, and just, pushes her palm into its face. Unable to fight back, the fluffle gets tipped back, and forced to flop onto its back. "help"
...There's more fluffles idling around here than I first realized! Also, for it being probably like midnight, there's more fluffles- I mean, more kappa here than I'd have expected! But, also more fluffles!
On the bridge, there's a kappa-sized fluffle standing amidst some idle looking kappa, pretending to be one of them.
An orange-haired kappa guy folds open this big green coat he's got on, showing a collection of plastic blocks inside. "Plastics. Hard plastic."
The fluffle flicks to face him, and romps up! "im you"
He closes his coat, an' both himself and the kappa he was speakin' to glower at it! "Get the hell outta here."
...Awkwardly, the fluffle works itself onto its side on the ground, holding itself up with one leg and one fin.
whump. It shoves its entire body forward into the kappa guy, headbutting him in the stomach!
"You-...!" Staggerin' back a little, all dusty now, he pulls outta revolver!
BAM- KABAM- BLAM- BOOM- BLAM! Holy fuck. All the kappa on the bridge pulled out various handguns and shotguns, and fired at the fluffle at once!
Since they were all aiming at the floor, so as to not hit each other, only the fluffle's legs become swiss cheese.
BANG. Suddenly, smile obscured, the fluffle had a grey pistol, which it shot at the orange-haired kappa fer no reason! "doctor kill"
"Ghk-" The orange-haired kappa was flung, dude!
Bam! He hits his spine on the bridge's edge, and rolls over it-
Splash! He landed in the water off the side a' the bridge!
VRRR- VRR- VRR- VRRR. Suddenly, I realize there's four massive sentry guns atop platforms on each corner of the bazaar. All the kappa on the bridge get off of it, and the fluffle looks around alarmed, like it knows what's gonna happen…!
"Waaal-" It jumps for some reason-
PATATAT- PATAT- PATAT- PATAT- BAM- KABAM- FWIIFWIFWIFWISH! What the fuck is goin' on son-
BOOM- BAM- BLAM- BOOM! Four rocket salvos hit the top of the bridge at once, and the entire top of it is obscured in amber and fire!
Danmaku gun pellets soar through the ground-shaking explosions, all the kappa nearby unloading a metric fuckton of firepower into it at once, even kappa from nearby carpets chipping in with their personal guns…!
...When the smoke clears, there's no fluffle to be seen. Just a giant fucking scorch mark on the bridge…!
BEEP- BEEP- BEEP- BEEP! The four omega sentries beep, before adopting neutral posture again…
"Hell yeah!"
"What the fuck…"
"Not sure if my sniper round made it."
"I'm lookin' at you, dustball…"
Slowly, the kappa all meander back onto the bridge, not even waiting for the smoke to clear. Jesus, fuck…!
Spla~sh. From the water nearby, the orange-haired kappa shambles out, his body alight with restorative energy. "Godsdamn-... monkey thing." Monkey thing, huh. I guess the fluffles might seem to kappas, like monkeys are to humans…
"I'm scared." Maria sounds really small, especially compared to that sonic boom that was all the kappa shootin' at once…!
"Let's not cause trouble here." Genkan's almost just as quiet…! I guess this must be the place you buy the nine hundred ninety nine TNT from, dude.
"Ye- yeah." Sanae grins big time, dude! "Kappa really are just-... better off left alone…!"
"This place seems very annoying." Tenshi decides… "Can you imagine fighting those sentries?"
"Eldest daughter…" Iku speaks up cautiously. "If you get pinned to the ground by those guns, I won't bail you out. Just so you're aware."
"Pinned to the ground?" Tenshi jerked her head back. "How."
"Back when the oni held this mountain," Iku drops some lore, dude. "The prototypes of these guns were powerful enough to suppress a single oni indefinitely. Of course, the kappa don't seek to take over the mountain now, but they used to be the main weapons of what they planned to be their signature style of land craft."
"...Wouldn't they, um…" Maria makes sure she's between all of us! "Run out? Like, um… guns do?"
Iku shook her head…? "With a kappa behind one of those guns, the ammo reserve of them would be nearly limitless for some time. It was recorded by the tengu, that the prototypes could shoot for multiple days, or up to a week, if the kappa manning it were changed out routinely, and there was an active supply line."
"...That implies the kappa would work together for any amount a' time." Tenshi contested!
Iku snorted in turn. "Exactly. They actually became very unpopular amongst the kappa, for this reason." Good…! "You'd probably be lucky to find a single kappa who wanted to sit near one for even an hour. The only reason these ones are alive at all, is because kappa who pass to and from this place make maintaining them an occasional hobby."
Ah, yes, the super powerful defense weapons that no one wants to actually work the logistics of. Freakin'...!
We cautiously meander across the bridge, which feels really sturdy. Probably for good reason!
"It's warm, here…" Ha-chan noted. Aw…
"That's the heat radiators." Iku noted! "They melt ice and snow. But, whenever it recently snows, they have to be shut down and cleaned off. Most kappa don't feel like doing that, so if it ever snows twice in succession, those heat generators end up exploding and causing small wildfires." That sounds bad…!
"Isn't that a huge waste…?" Maria wonders. "They'd have to keep remaking them…"
"They just reclaim the metal of broken parts, reshape them, and build another one." Iku explained… "Or, buy another one from someone who decided to spend a couple days only making heat generators, expecting everyone else to explode theirs." Hoh, shit. "...For this reason, there's a serious surplus of heat generators sometimes, and an extreme shortage at other times."
"im flintstone" A fluffle came up to us, once we got off the bridge. "flintstones"
"Please, go away." Genkan tries to see the fluffle off! "We don't want to associate with your kind."
"im kind" The fluffle said back ta her! "gentile"
An' then it walks off, shuffling up to a kappa girl wit' blue-white hair.
Clong. The moment it gets near her carpet, she stands up and whips out a fryin' pan, and whacks it onto its side!
Aw. There's a dude with bright green hair, and he's sellin' shoes, dude.
I walk up ta him, and can feel Maria an' Genkan tense up behind me! "Hello, friend."
...He tilts his head up at me, his grey-blue eyes meetin' me, pokin' just under the hem a' his hat. "Buyin'?"
"I think so!" I nod! "...Whaddaya sellin', son."
He looked down at his stock! "...Lava Waders. Anti-ice slip-proof treads. Extremely durable sandals. Mew Shoes. Mighty Boots."
Daah. Huh. I look at my party members idly…!
Iku speaks! "Lava Waders provide immunity to lava and fire damage for short bursts, then require a cooldown. Anti-slip treads are as they say. Those sandals are made of a wood-adamantite alloy, and are hideously expensive. The boots provide immunity to short pools of toxins or lava, but are easily destroyed by both toxins and lava."
...Aw. "What about the shoes that have little cat faces on them, dude." Freakin' cat slippers, dude.
...Iku frowns! "They, um…"
The kappa picks them up fer us, and puts them back down!
"Meow- Meow!" Oh my god, the shoes make loud meowing noises.
"They also give immunity to cat damage." Iku- wh- cat damage. "...That is to say, cats will no longer make you sneeze, and when they cut you, it will sting a little less. You also cannot catch cat scratch fever."
"...How much, son." Let's buy some Mew Shoes, son.
"One million, two hundred thousand." He decides. Sounds good enough to me!
"Brad-..." Genkan speaks up! "Are you sure we should be buying those?"
"Yes." We must buy the Mew Shoes, son. This is now a mission objective.
Sanae nods, steppin' up behind everyone! "I only heard a little- but you need those shoes!"
"But, we need food." Maria- when'd we need food. "You're gonna spend our food money on Mew Shoes." We don't have 'food money' in the first place…!
"I advise against buying them." Iku suggests! "They're of no value."
"I think they're cute!" Ha-chan speaks from her raiment thing cocoon!
"We're gonna sta~rve." Maria monotones!
Diggin' through my pocket, I take out the yen, an' set it down!
"They're all yours." The kappa swipes up the yen in one impossible scoop, despite how messily I set it all down!
Pickin' up the Mew Shoes, I slide 'em into the good bag, an' close my eyes-
Fwi- Click! I land on my feet after equippin' 'em, havin' them replace my Toyota Sandals-
"Meow- Meow!" Aw, dude. They're kinda comfy, too!
"Oh, no." Genkan deflates, a little!
"You doomed us." Maria frowned at the shoes…!
"Gods." Iku rubbed her temples…!
"Oh, boy!" Sanae grinned down at them! "They make mewing noises!"
"Yes, dude!" I start marchin' forward-
"Meow- meow- meow, meow!" Oh, god. This totally isn't gonna get old in like, the next two milliseconds!
"Do you have another pair…?" Tenshi's got a shit-eatin' grin, as she gets closer to the kappa on his carpet!
"...I might know someone." He pointed to his right! "Two carpets down."
Meow, meow, meow, meow. I stomp down the road ahead of everyone, movin' towards the north end of the kappa bazaar thing…!
That's when a fluffle meanders from the kappas and stuff, and comes up to me.
whump. It leaned its whole body over, and whumped its head into my stomach, 'cause it was kappa-sized. "Oof." Why's this fluffle just attackin' me…!?
whump, whump. After it floatily rams itself against me like, a couple more times, I bring my left leg up, and stomp it down on its head when it tries to whump me a third time!
"Meeee~w!" There's just a really long mew sound, when I press the fluffle into the dirt!
"...I have a feeling, that that's going to become a trend." Genkan says somethin' enigmatic…!
...I give her a fluffy look. "Why's that, dude…?"
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
We meandered outta the kappa bazaar!
"Mew- MEOW- Mew, mew- MEOW, MEOW- Mew!" Me and Tenshi stomp down the snowy trail! We're headin' towards the Hakurei Shrine now, and there's no actual trail, just a whole lotta woods and snow and plains.
"Please, make it stop." Genkan mentally numbs, as she drifts along with us!
"Those shoes are the loudest things ever." Maria complains! "Why…?"
"Words cannot express my disappointment, eldest daughter." Iku's experiencing a similar emotion…
"No one will bother us now!" I exclaim! "We have the powers of god an' anime on our side, son!"
...Sanae turns to all of us! "You technically do!" She- counts, doesn't she…!?
So we're walkin' through the woods, meowing up a storm! This is good, dude.
"If this keeps up, I'll have to pull them off of you myself." Genkan threatens, as maybe a joke!
"Don't worry." Genkan says- wait that ain't Genkan- "I've come here to do just that."
I turn to my right, an' there's a chick wit' long black hair, and a royal red kimono next to us!
FWA- FWASH! She holds her arms out towards me- and ice explodes offa' her hands-
Fwo- fwoash! And, I heal from it! "Holy shit-" It still makes me jump though! "Hey- yo!" I hold out my arms! "What'd I do!?"
"Sister- stop!" Genkan jolts up next to me! "This human- has done no ill to me!"
...The yuki-onna blinked! "...I said nothing about that. I was napping in the snow, when those godsforsaken-"
MEW- MEW! Tenshi steps up behind her! "Hey."
"You, too!?" She turned to face Tenshi! "I'll have to silence both of you, then."
Kawham. Tenshi slowly punched her in the ribs.
"Uu- oh…" The yuki-onna crumpled instantly…! "Wh-"
Whunk. Tenshi then slowly punted her. "This is gonna be hilarious when I get back ta heaven!"
"Onh!" That poor freakin' yuki-onna just flopped onto her side! "Da- damn-... it…"
"He- hey." Genkan drifted forward, and held her arms out! "She didn't mean us any harm. If anything, we disturbed-"
KAFWISH- FWISH- FWISH! Suddenly, huge snowflakes explode into being around our party!
"Hehehe!" Fairy noises! "I heard- I heard something-"
KABLAM! Chik- chik! Kappa shotgun noises, in the air… "What the hell is that meowing sound!?"
"Truly…" A yuki-onna in a white-blue kimono like Genkan's hovers outta nowhere! "...That's- a lot of people-"
"Um." Sanae gets near us! "There's- even more-"
Woo- woosh! Harpies drop down from above! "Who the- who woke me up-"
Fwi- fwish! From the brush, a- that's an actual tengu guy! "What's going on-" Good question-
THOOM, THOOM. From around a nearby tree, a fucking huge girl lumbers out, with a huge, glowing azure shell on her back…! "Who~... awakens-...?" Holy shit…!
...Genkan floats near me, and- ohp, she just picks me up! "I can't believe we were woken up." She plays along…! "Truly, whoever is wearing those meowing shoes is a huge menace."
MEW- ME~W! Tenshi steps forward, brandishing her sword. "Fuckin'- come at me~! I woke you all up!" Freakin'...!
BAM- FWISH- KABOOM- BOOM! Tenshi gets rushed by like ten youkai at once…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Holy fucking shit…!
All of us are keeping a cautious like, ten-twenty meters behind Tenshi, as she stomps down the field in her Mew Shoes…!
MEW, MEW, ME~W! Her shoes mewdle louder than the crunching of snow. She's got like two yuki-onna hanging off of her, there's like twenty fairies overhead-
TINK! An arrow from that tengu guy hits her in the boob, but just explodes as it bounces off of her.
FWIWOOSH! That giant turtle girl hurtles out from the woods way way to the left of us-
KABOOM! She slams into Tenshi's form, stopping for an instant, before rebounding right off, an explosion of ice made on impact.
The burst of ice crystals and frost blows the yuki-onna offa' Tenshi's form! "You- won't fuckin' stop coming, will you!?" Tenshi just shakes her fist at the turtle girl!
WHABOOM! She whips her scarlet sword out, and it extends, exploding on impact with the turtle girl…!
"Oo~nh!" What the hell's that noise. The big turtle girl just flops back, doing a few flips-
SHOOF! She gets embedded in the nearby snow, on her back. "Nnh…"
"Sister!" That yuki-onna in the royal red kimono snaps back towards our party, to talk to Genkan! "Put your prey down and help! We must teach this celestial her manners…!"
"Who are you…?" Genkan gives her a bemused look back! "And-... no, thank you."
woosh. Suddenly, there was another yuki-onna near us, with a black kimono on! "I have a knife." She showed us her ice knife…!
"...Wh- what?" Genkan gave her a worried look! "Oh. You're-... her. I've heard about you, actually."
She grinned back at us! "Ehehe. I have a knife…" Uh oh.
woosh. She flew forward, towards Tenshi…!
KABOOM! Tenshi faced her, and her sword just fuckin' explodes in that yuki-onna's face-
Shoof. The black-clad yuki-onna lands in the snow next to us. "Oo- nhuh…" Good. That knife really helped…!
"...You no longer have a knife." Genkan informed her. Good…!
Dippin' back towards us, the red-clad yuki-onna heaves her breaths. "Ha- aah… ha~h… this- celestial…"
"Why-..." Genkan stops her, before she can lunge into the fray again. "Why bother?"
...She looks back at us, and seems to visibly calm down. "Well-... isn't being awoken- from a nap in the snow simply the worst? And, now that I'm awake, I'm in the mood to play. This simply kills two birds with one stone."
"Y'know…" I can't help but notice! "Do you guys make a conscious effort ta wear different color kimonos…!?"
...The other yuki-onna looks up at Genkan again! "You haven't incapacitated him, yet?"
"Well, only partially, I'd imagine." Ignorin' her, Genkan answers my question. "Myself, I've respected tradition. But, I hear red and blue are quite popular, too."
"...That doesn't look very traditional." The other yuki-onna judged Genkan. "Are you attempting a new strategy, to lure humans? Because, I will say… that outfit of yours, it strikes me as tasteless."
"Well-" Genkan begins, but I don't let 'er!
From the bridal carry I ended up in, I point at the other yuki-onna! "Yer tasteless! She's hot, dude!"
...Lookin' mixed, the other yuki-onna responds. "I- suppose it works, at least."
PI~CHUN! That- was a loud 'fairies dying' noise…!
"Oh, dear." The red-clad yuki-onna gives a worried look forward! "Um-"
poomf. A snowball hits her face at rocket speed.
crunch. She lands on her ass in the snow! "Oo-... ow…"
...The violence seems to be over! Tenshi has, in short order, driven away or wiped out the opposition.
Giving the collapsed yuki-onna a simple look, Genkan continues to carry me forward to end the conversation as fast as possible…!
The Hakurei Shrine rests on the hill just ahead a' us; we're just before the tiny stretch of woods that leads up ta it.
"Mmh." Sanae makes a loafsome noise. "We're almost the~re." Hoh…
I'd forgotten how much of a trial it is to jog across the land! But, having multiple team tanks helps, especially with freakin'... hard to reach places, like the entirety of Youkai Mountain.
Genkan's still carrying me, just so I don't pull the entire forest's worth a youkai in with my shoes. Maybe I should wear these more often, dude. This sweater she has on is pretty nice!
...I didn't super notice in the moment, but she also has to hold onto me more awkwardly, 'cause holy shit breasts.
MEW, MEW, MEO~W. Tenshi's shoes... still meow, however. I think she's just cleared out enough shit around us that we're not pulling in random noobs anymore!
crunch, crunch. In the snow ahead of us, there's one more person. Oh, boy. Wait…
Comin' down from the Hakurei hillside, is Hina! Y'know, the misfortune goddess!
We approach her meow-style, and she looks a little offput as we all near!
"Mm- rrmh." Ha-chan makes stirred noises from within her warm electric cloth cocoon thing.
"Um…" Hina's not sure what ta say to us! "Hello…?"
"Oh, hey." Sanae gives her a wa~ve. "It's you. ...What were you doing at that shrine, actually?"
"Ah…" Hina smiled! "Reimu actually called on me for something, you see."
Tenshi snapped her fingers, and pointed 'em at her! "You had sex."
...Hina's smile became emburdened! "Um? ...I think not. No."
"Damn it." Tenshi took a step back-
MEOW! Uh oh. Hina jumped a little at the sound, 'cause it was so fuckin' loud!
"...Every time you two step in those strange shoes," Hina began, "your party's misfortune grows greater."
Tenshi snorts! "Cool."
"Not cool." Genkan doesn't snort… "These shoes are a menace."
"Hey, Hina." I look over at Hina from Genkan's arms…! "How do you delete someone else's posts?" What a surreal moment.
I just asked a goddess of misfortune how to delete someone else's posts, after being carried in from the cold by a sexbomb ice woman in a bridal carry. The true male fantasy, son.
Sanae chuckles in the background! "Freaking…"
"What?" Hina's just confused, though. "...I will say... there are some of you, with… notable misfortune."
"Oh?" This actually interested Sanae! "Who?"
...Hina looked around at us! "Most of it is his. The yuki-onna and the mage girl have a little, too." Aw, yes. Is misfortune inherent ta being in a JRPG party…!?
"That must suck." Tenshi really does not care…! "How about me? I'm bored outta my fuckin' mind."
"Language." Iku reminds her!
"...Fuck." Tenshi refuses!
"Not particularly." Hina shook her head, arms together at her waist. "Situationally, perhaps, but your fortune is overall quite positive. I may suggest… thinking more positively, instead?" Ho~h.
Then, Hina blinked! "Oh. That fairy is unfortunate to extents, too. Which is quite irregular, as fairies tend not to harbor misfortune at all." Hoh? Ha-chan, huh?
Movin' forward, she begins ta step past us plainly. "Now… um. If any of you'd ever like to deposit misfortune, I do have a home at the base of the mountain. You don't have to go tonight, but… the sooner you stop by, the better it'd probably be for you."
Then, she stopped before me an' Genkan! "...Especially you." Her eyes traced me! "You had quite a sum, our first meeting, and at that village concert, you were accumulating it at an… interesting rate." Uh oh.
...Once Hina's fully past us, Genkan stares down at me! "That checks out." Wahaha.
"Huh." Sanae doesn't seem surprised, either! But, she also doesn't so much as conversate wit' us over this, which is a little curious. At least, I think…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Ah, yes. The Hakurei Shrine. It's been a little while, since I've last been here, dude. Not too long, but still kinda a while ago!
Clack. I slam the backdoor open, and-
Mew- Mew- MEOW- Mew- MEOW! Me an' Tenshi roll in like we own the place, smilin' down!
"Your home has another door." I state, as we usher forth the cat-ocalypse!
Reimu springs up from her kotatsu- oh holy shit she's mad! "So it was you!" Woah no!
"Yeah, what about it?" Tenshi leered ahead at her! "We're fucking meowing fiends!"
Reimu romps up to us in her socks, all snuggly-like-
CLACK! Wh- oo- ow…! Her gohei- my ribs, they didn't mix…!
VRRRM! Tenshi's scarlet sword revs ta life-
WHUNK. A huge yin-yang came down from somewhere overhead, beanin' Tenshi in the face! "Nghk-" She slips onto her knees from the mere force of the oncoming, big yin-yang.
Clack. When Tenshi's there on her knees, Reimu thrusts the hilt a' her gohei forward, and lands it right inside Tenshi's mouth.
"Nnn…!" Then, Reimu kicked her left leg straight out-
Thunk. She tried kickin' the gohei and like- I dunno what it was even supposed ta do, but Tenshi just bit down on the hilt…!
woosh. Quickly, Iku drifts inside, and two gentle-looking bands of her raiment float out, for both of them.
zap- zap. They both get zapped, a little.
"Nhf." Reimu does a really floaty looking backflip, before landing on her stomach. "Oohf…"
"Kha-" Tenshi opens her mouth, an' the gohei falls out. "Ouch."
...From the floor, Reimu glowered, and-
fwap! She tossed one ofuda forward, that met Tenshi's face.
Kzzt- fzzt- zap- zap! It initializes, but Tenshi just staggers back! "Yh- aahaa~h…"
"Please…" Iku got between them! "It's too late, for this sort of thing."
thump, thump, thump! Now in her socks, Sanae romps up! "Reimu~!"
"What…!?" Reimu's jaw drops, as she sees Sanae run up ta her! Then, she starts ta stand back up…! "Oh- no-"
But, it's too late. Sanae glomps her, and pulls her close! "Good evening, Reimu!"
"What-..." Exhaling, Reimu just looks tired. Considering how late it is, that's not actually something notable! "I'm not- really in the mood, for a sleepover. And-..." She looks over at my whole party, who meanders in! "Wha~t. Ugh..."
"We're the marching band." I exclaim, as I nurse my ribs! "Freakin'...!" She did a number on me with one hit! Jesus!
...Genkan gently glides across the floor on her socks, and pokes an arm out at me-
Fwoash! Ice magic meets me, an' I just heal. "Aa- ooh."
fli- flick! Aw, dude! Seikatsu uncloaks to heal me, even though it's a bit late!
"Why are so many people here…!?" Reimu looks distraught! "It's midni~ght!"
Shoof. The kitchen door opens, an' a really floaty looking girl kinda prances out. Aw. She's got long, navy blue hair, and some patchwork, brown villager-esque clothing.
And- she actually gives me a run for my money in the 'thin limbs' department! I thought I was just bone, but Jesus is she malnourished…!
Wait. She's-
Genkan points! "It's the disaster." Aw, yes dude. The disaster.
"Oh, no." Maria stated casually. Aw…
…The navy-haired girl looks intimidated, too! "When were there so many people…?"
MEW, MEOW, MEW! Tenshi struts up ta her, the Hakurei talisman on her forehead glowing like a wildfire! "Hh- hey…!"
...I don't think navy girl knows what ta think! But, she speaks anyway. "...I-... I like your shoes."
Reaching forward, her hand goes for the Hakurei talisman, and just yoinks it off.
...Tenshi blinks a bunch, and takes in a deep breath! "Hh- ho~ly shit. Woah." Then, she focuses on the navy girl. "...You- can just, do that? When I try, it stings like hell."
"Well, yeah." The girl admits fluffily. "I can. They don't hurt gods as much."
"Gods…?" Tenshi blinked!
"Oh?" Sanae beamed! "Are you the Hakurei god…!?"
"No." Reimu rolled up a sleeve! "That's stupid. You're stupid."
"The~n…" Sanae became pensive. "Do you have a shrine maiden?"
Navy-girl snorted at that. "...No. You could say, my maiden is misfortune." Hoh, shit…! Wait…
That makes me wonder! "Are you the real Hina Kagiyama!?" I point at 'er!
...She looks a little confused, an' shakes her head. "Um. No? I'm Shion. But, like her, I am a goddess of misfortune. Um… unlike her… I'm 'among my element'. I don't collect, wrestle and consume other's misfortune… I am misfortune."
Tenshi snorted, arms on her own hips. "Whatever the hell that means. If you can remove Hakurei seals, you must be pretty powerful."
...Genkan takes an idle step forward-
thump! She slips, and ends up on her ass! "Ooh!" She's also really surprised about it! "Aha- wh- what…?" She even laughed at it!
I turn ta her-
Somethin' happens that hasn't happened in a long time. It used to happen to me on the outside. My left ankle rolls, making my whole left foot twist on its side, and my leg bends like fuckin thirty degrees to accommodate- yeah, uh-
Meow- Meow- thu- thud! I fall onto Genkan! "Oof…!"
"What're you guys-" Maria turns, too- "Oo- eee!"
Wh- wait what the fuck-
Whack! Maria falls way back onto her ass, and her boot thing hits me in the face! "Oo-... ow!"
...Genkan rolls me down into her lap. She's soft, dude.
"Guuh." I'm more dead inside than I thought! My body wants to sleep.
"...Did you do that?" Tenshi gestured to our pile of assfuck!
...Shion closed her eyes, and nodded. "Ye- yes. That was probably my fault."
"...Kinda badass, actually." Tenshi nodded in approval! Then, she met Shion's gaze again. "Well, I'm never not lucky, apparently. You need a shrine maiden or something, right?"
"...We- well, no?" Shion's just confused now, dude. She's really cute, and really snuggly. "But-"
"We should run around doing stupid shit." Tenshi proposed…! "Me, you, and these shoes. We're gonna be an actual riot."
...Shion blinked! "You're-... not afraid?"
"Pftuh. No." When it comes to Tenshi, that's kind of a stupid question... "I had ta fight like fifty people just ta get here, tonight. It'd be pretty funny if you made everyone who wanted to fight me just, flop over themselves. Hey- does that thing apply to objects, too? Oh- man…"
Suddenly, Tenshi looks stoked! "If your weird area thing works on rocks, we could run around breaking my dad's monolith things!"
...Shion smiled at her! "Um… I think maybe. Sometimes. I wouldn't be a burden, for you?"
"What could burden me." Tenshi grinned back! "Nah, fuck that. Do you need to sleep?"
"...No?" Shion blinked!
"Perfect." Tenshi moved for the door we came in through! "Who were you, Sheen? Shine? Anyway- I want you to come with me!"
"...Okay?" Slowly, Shion floated off the ground, an' after her! "And do what?"
"We will destroy heaven," Tenshi began, drawing her sword's hilt. "Through the combined powers of shoes and poor people!"
...Shion gave some hard nods! "That- does sound like fun, actually." Wait, what…!
MEOW- MEW- MEOW- MEOW! Tenshi sprints out the door, and Shion hovers after 'er!
...Iku just kinda blinks, and moves for the door too! "Um. It's- been nice meeting you three, I suppose. And, Genkan-... remember to cut loose, once in awhile. Take it from me."
"Aa-..." Genkan looks up at 'er from the floor, where we're just still in a freakin' pile. "Yes. Thank you for everything, Iku."
An' with that, Iku zoomed off after 'em.
...Sanae was now just standin' next to Reimu, lookin' displaced. "What just happened…!?"
Meanwhile, Reimu simmered, fluffy maiden style. "If buildings start falling outta the sky, I'm gonna learn how to fire Fantasy Heaven from a distance." ...Then, she gives us all a grumptacular look! "At least there's less people."
"Awh." Sanae raised her brows. "I know food and stuff is tight for you, Reimu, but uhm…" Sanae tried really hard to think of a positive!
"There's no 'but'." Reimu countered. "Food's tight, the shrine's cold, it's winter, people keep trying to make me do things at midnight, it's hard to sleep, life sucks. If you came from the front, you'd see I hung a 'do not disturb' sign up."
"Well." There wasn't a lot Sanae could say to that! "Uuh. I could think of a few things, to fix some of that…"
"No gifts." Reimu shook her head. "I know your game. Last time I accepted a gift, it was-... of course, politicized."
In the bleakly white-lit shrine, Sanae spoke quietly. "An' people never find out how much you sleep at other people's places…? I mean-... you don't really get donations to begin with..."
Reimu exhaled. "...The villagers don't really know about my sleepovers. Don't really care what the youkai do and don't know. Last time I accepted a gift from you, particularly, people were running around in the village saying your shrine was puppeting mine."
"...I- I mean- I don't super have a say in what Kan- Lady Kanako does." Sanae wiggled her arms, a little. "What- what if… I brought you, a single mandarin?"
"A single mandarin." Reimu restated. "My heart pounds in elation and excitement."
"But- Lady Kanako couldn't play it up!" Sanae beamed back! "So if I brought you a ton of single mandarins, one at a time-... you'd have a ton of mandarins!"
Ha-chan romps up to them, since this conversation is relevant to her interests! "I like oranges!"
"What if-" Sanae stepped closer ta Reimu! "What if, to keep you warm… someone slept with you?"
"Ahah." Reimu grinned. "Yeah, no way. I'm not close enough to anyone for that to ever happen."
...Sanae put her arms on her own hips! "Oh, really."
"Really." Reimu looked plain.
...mew- meow, mew- meow! Oh- shit. Those aren't my shoes that're mewing, either!
Shoof! The front door to the shrine swings open! "Oo- oh, shit!" It's Marisa! Her entire back is covered in ice, and her broom's frozen to her leg!
Clack! She shuts the door, then sprints further in-
Meow- Mew- Meow- Meow! She's got Mew Shoes, son.
shii~f. She drops into a knee slide, an' ends up under the kotatsu. "Aa- ooh… shi~t, ze…"
...Reimu just frowns at Sanae!
"Ooh!" Sanae's got a hand before her own mouth! "What a coincidence! Must be some kinda miracle, huh, Reimu~?"
"Dude!" Marisa suddenly exclaimed! "I was walkin' around my lawn, when suddenly a buncha yuki-onna tried to take over my turf!"
...Then, she saw me an' Genkan! "The heck's goin' on in here…?"
"Well." Reimu suddenly looked really tired. "Guess I lose, then."
"Yeah." Sanae blinked. "Whah."
clunk. Closing her eyes, Reimu dropped onto her knees.
thud. Then, she collapsed onto her stomach. "Nnh."
...Sanae grinned! "Eheh. Long day, huh?"
...Aw. Quiet time, dude. We all hear the sounds of wind hitting the shrine, an' Ha-chan makes funny faces in the background.
"Reimu?" Sanae crouched down! "...Oo- oh. I- I think she actually, like... just collapsed. Um."
"Ohp…" Marisa began to crawl around the kotatsu…! "Yeah-... I- I feel 'er."
thud. She thrusts her body across Reimu's and just zonks out, too. "Nhn."
Thunk. The big sheet of ice draped across her back breaks off, all of a sudden!
What loafs. I wanna loaf, too…
Aw, wait. I just remembered what Nemuno called 'em. Hello, Rimjob an' Melissa! Mel-ass-a.
...Sanae huffs, an' leans back from them. Then, she looks over at us. "Man. Seeing Reimu just drop like that freaks me out a little. You know?"
"...I- might empathize." Genkan awkwardly states, while we're both just on the floor still. "Should we-... move them both into a futon, then?"
"Probably!" Sanae bends down ta get to work!
...Genkan looks down at me! "Tr- try not to wake them, you."
"I don't think I'd manage!" I retort, dude. "An' it wouldn't be fer a lack of trying…!"
Meow- meow! I get back up. Actually, s'it really just my party and Sanae, now? Huh.
"Nn- nnh…" Sanae has a really hard time picking both Reimu an' Marisa up! As in, she just doesn't manage. "La- Lady Suwako! Infuse my body- with the unmoving breath of the earth!"
kr- kroo~m. The shrine rumbles a little, and suddenly Sanae's body looks way heavier!
"Alright!" Grinning, she bends down again. "Hup!" Really easily, she just scoops the two up! "...You think I should undress them?"
"It's the middle of winter." Genkan is ironically- or perhaps not ironically- the first person to point out how bad of an idea that would be! "Give them more blankets, if anything. Perhaps a campfire, too."
"...Ye- yeah." With that, Sanae starts to move. "...So- someone help me with the doors."
"Me!" Ha-chan bounds onto the scene! "I can open doors!"
shoof. Both girls romp on into the next room once Ha-chan gets it open.
...Genkan turns to me! "I was going to help them, but I suppose they have it under control."
"You say 'I suppose' a lot." Maria notes…!
...Genkan looks at her, an 'smiles! "I suppose I do. I do a lot of supposing, I suppose."
Y'know. "I wonder how this sounds in Japanese." Like… that's something that only makes sense in English as far as I'm aware!
"Don't think about it too hard." Genkan inadvertently holds the fabric of reality together! "I have no idea when or where we're going to bed, tonight. I want it to be somewhere comfy, in honesty…"
"I still feel a little clumsy, after sleeping in that pile of blankets in Heaven." Maria admitted! "Brad-... before you met us, didn't you like, sleep on tables and stuff?"
"...Yeah!" I admit! "I kinda felt like shit, but was too excited about everything to care!"
Slowly, the Hakurei Shrine's white magilights start to dim, probably supported by Reimu's faith magic, or something. "Uh oh." We're fading to black, son.
Soon, the room is totally dark.
"...Do neither of you know about magi-lights?" Maria asks!
"My magic is weaker here." Genkan provided. Oh, right! "The power of the Hakurei leaves my magic flow numb, and my body… well. Long story short, I couldn't hug a human to death in this environment. My body would never feel cold enough to them." Huh.
"...Brad?" Maria looks at me!
"I don't!" I am not a magi-light kinda man, son. "Help."
"They're simple. Even I know about them." Maria criticizes my lack of knowledge… "Like, um. Since you can kinda spell cast, try using your mana to search the room."
How the fuck do I do that, again. Like-... close my eyes, an' say bippity boppity boo?
Closin' my eyes does help, 'cause I remember all the magic an' shit I've felt before! Hoh- okay, let's see…
Oh. Wait, I see that- or rather, sense- that super warm and really… weighty feeling point above me. Lemme just-... can I allocate magic to that? Wait- how do I move my magic between two things…!?
Maybe it's like shootin' those darts. Focus on the mana as it-... gets to the tip of my flesh- aw! It leaves the cusp of my flesh- I can feel it, and kinda drifts, losing form as it gets closer to the warm area in the air…
When it reaches the orb, it lights up, casting a really clumsy, sorta dim yellow-teal light across the room, from one point. S'not as unified as the bleak, consistent white Reimu had pretty much just casually coming down from the ceiling.
"...I did it!" I made a light!
"Sort of." Maria smiled! "Like-... that was just the conceptual access point for the roof lighting. But, it does work on its own, I guess."
I look down at the kotatsu-
Seiga is there. She's smiling, seated under it, looking up at us lazily.
"Like, normally…" Maria hasn't seen her yet. Genkan's just lookin' loafish, too. "You'd route the magic into the access point, and it'd be an easy way for you to spread influence and-... well, this one's made for faith, but the concept's sort of the same. I could figure out how to-..."
Maria sees Seiga. "Wh-"
"Hello~." Seiga greets us.
Genkan snaps her gaze to her! "...Yh- you?"
"Me." Seiga opened her eyes. "How are you?"
"What're you doing here?" Maria gets closer to us, between me an' Genkan.
"I came to visit the Hakurei." Seiga let her head lean to the right. "But… it seems she was tired. Too tired. I'll have to see her another time. So, for now, I'll make idle talk with you three."
"...What do we have to- to talk about?" Maria seems to be gettin' real bad vibes from 'er.
"Mmm…" Seiga inhaled. She pulled out a gold-brown smokin' stick, leaning back in her seat. "I don't know. Say, mister. You and that fairy have quite a bond, don't you?"
Hi. "We're loafs."
She grins back. "Yes, of course. How do you think she feels, about you warming up to that yuki-onna, instead of her?"
"Doesn't really care!" Pretty sure we faced this subject already! "Fairies seem ta be really open-minded, yo."
Raisin' a brow, Seiga gazed at me. "Are they? Are they, really…?"
I dunno, sometimes. They're kinda like kids or teens, or asshole cats. Sometimes they have really awesome ideas that even mature people don't have, 'cause they're so off the wall. Provided, they're also freakin' stupid the other big chunk of the time.
"But, were some fairies you've known not goal-oriented? Some were, perhaps, abstracted, or placed at a level beyond what a human may call open-minded?" Seiga talks some confusing shit!
...Call it a crazy ass hunch, but I got an idea. "You've been followin' us, haven't ya?" I point at her!
Seiga snorts. "Mmm? Changing the topic? I don't see why I'd do such a thing."
...Genkan looks contemplative. "I would've sensed her, I'm sure. I did not."
But- hmm. I do not have evidence, or reason to care, if she has or has not been following us! But- she has shown creepy interest in Maria. So… idea.
"Hoh." I nod casually, dude. "I've seen how you've been eye-ballin' Maria. All the way up to now, dude. On the rocky road trail, dude." I'm startin' to lose direction…!
...Lookin' up at me again, Seiga exhales, after takin' a smoke from her stick. "Fwuu." A ring of smoke comes out…!
Then, she speaks. "You must be more aware of your surroundings, than I gave you credit for." Wait. Wait- hol' up!
"Was I right…!?" I was actually just kinda shitting around! "Uh oh!"
Genkan moves to palm her own face briefly, before accidentally brushing her larger-than-average bust in the process! "Re- really…"
Seiga didn't really react, though. "...Perhaps. You see, the crown prince still saw talent in you three. She assigned me multiple days of simple reporting on you, to make up for other misdeeds I have committed. I simply wish to do good to those around me." Daa~h.
"I don't believe that." Maria also smells the bullshit! "...Te- tell the 'prince' or whoever they are to leave us alone. I don't-... I want you to leave me alone."
"Oo~h, don't be that way." Seiga sinks into the kotatsu a little- and not literally, mind you…! "You're interested in magic, ri~ght?"
...Maria's expression was really pensive! "Su~re?"
Seiga pointed her smokin' stick at me! "And, you. Are you not burdened by having to cater to those around you, even if in basic social practices?"
Oh, man, how long's she been eavesdroppin' on us, anyway? "My ass is empty."
...Seiga just blinks!
It actually takes a moment, but she responds to that! "I- don't think that's an answer, honey."
"Bird and bear in Seiga's tower," this just came to me in the silence, "your asshole I will soon devour."
...Genkan has to use her hand ta hide her quiet chucklin'! An' Maria just gives me the lostest of looks…!
"Can you just answer the question." Seiga's actually annoyed!
"No." Since you asked nicely!
"...Good." Leaning her head back, Seiga let her gaze drift up. "...Oh, well. Such a shame. Perhaps I should explain, how healthy alone time can be for yourself."
Where is she actually going with this. "Seiga, I got a question."
"Hmm?" She smiles a little higher, dude. "Ask away."
"When you close the refrigerator door, does the little light stay on?" Get owned, son…!
...She literally doesn't even dignify that with a response! "I'm sure you've felt it. The desire to break loose, and do your own things. Don't you find them dragging you around?"
"Is there a point to this?" Genkan wants to know! "I'm detesting this line of questioning."
Seiga snorted, again. "Ahah. You would. My implication, is that you are a bother to your endless food source, there."
Now you done did it, son. "My implication's-... that I'm gonna whump you." I had nothing…! Wait! "My implication's- that Genkan has bigger boobs than you!"
Spurred, Seiga stands from the kotatsu! Well, more like floats up through it. "Why do you strain yourself, so? Are you not only losing?"
"You're losing, son!" I must be as unhelpful as possible!
...She closes her eyes. After a moment of good thinking, she opens them, gazin' at me. "They will make you weaker. You will not grow. And, isn't growth, and power… so important, to you, at heart?"
Then, she freakin' tokes from her smokes.
...We just kinda watch her stink up the room for a few moments.
"Aa-..." Then, Maria suddenly jolts into activity! "Bless!" She thrusts her frost staff into the air, all of a sudden!
Di- di~ng! Oo- ooh! That star-shape thing forms inside a' me, and I feel my mind expand son. Well, more like I can feel some good juju flowin'...!
"Fwu- nh- hu." ...Seiga just sighs out a messy smoke cloud. Wahaha!
Mew- Meow- Mew- Mew! I stomp a bunch in place, makin' loud cat noises! "I'm growing stronger, son! Those… who I surround myself with, have in fact literally made me stronger!"
"You three are seriously retarded." Seiga's had enough, son! "I can't believe such a dim little girl was the daughter of such a mage."
I hold my arm up into the air, son. I dunno if this counts as magically-made physical damage, or magical damage, but I'm doin' it…!
"Hoh!" Casting the arm down, the scent pillow is unleashed!
woosh. It falls down from above, and sails right through Seiga's head.
But then, she snaps an arm back an' catches it with her offhand, and holds it up. "...Mmh, yes. A pillow shelled in artificially aged semen. Quite disgusting, very funny, surely." Then, she just tosses it away…!
"Oh my god." I turn to Genkan… "She's immune to jokes, dude." It's the final boss of ToonTown Online!
"So!" Sanae suddenly romps back into the room!
I look over at her fer a moment, then back at Seiga-
Seiga's fucked off. Ooo~.
...Genkan just looked kinda bemused! "You'd think hermits would be more used to people pretending to be idiots."
I feel like it was less that, and more like she was really counting on us taking her troll bait, and other things maybe. I was not giving her even an inch! I dunno much about Seiga, but she just emanates spookiness to me!
"Say whah." Sanae was not allowed to follow the events! "...You guys look tired."
Ah, yeah. I wanna collapse like Reimu just did there!
"We-..." Genkan slows down a little more than usual! "We want somewhere comfy to sleep."
Wait. Actually- don't we have that option…?
I reach into my bag. The fuck was it- like, a box thing…? A key? I'm lookin' for the Tiny Tim's Motel shit!
Oh, right. Red square… things, with odd Japanese carvings. I bought like what, three? Oh, two. Two tent accesses…
We could all sleep in a pile in a tent, or sleep on the cold ass floor. Reimu may or may not have guest futons, actually. I kinda wanna save the tents for the day we need to sleep in a barren hellworld or something. Provided, we could just go back and buy freakin' mansion-tier stays from Tiny Tim since we've got loadsa money now.
Y'know what, what the heck. Let's use a tent! I will not let my JRPG gamer instincts convince me to withhold all the expendable items!
"We're all gonna sleep in a tent." I decide, takin' out a freakin'... red, runic dorito.
...Sanae blinked, not expecting this! "A- tent, huh. You're carrying a tent around? Wouldn't that be really cold?"
"I don't think so!" I move for one a' the shrine doors!
My palm presses against the side a' the door frame. Alright, we in boys. Operation: snooze 'n' floof is a success.
"Alright, yo." I step back from the door-
Suddenly, I see the tent! The rest of the door that is taller than the tent becomes just-... well it doesn't become anything, the wedge-shaped portal into the tent is just kinda there.
"I see what we gotta do now, yo." Crouchin' down, I start crawlin' in… "We just gotta go in this small triangle, dude."
"Um…" Genkan an' the others just kinda look down unsurely…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Outside the tent, there is the world's smallest outcropping of woods and night sky you've ever seen.
Also, holy shit. Maybe I shoulda spent the money on the tier up from 'tiny ass tent'...!
I'm squished into the left of the tent, wit' Genkan against my side, and Ha-chan on my back. I'm getting smushed!
Sanae's on the right, and Maria's squished between her and Genkan! "Wh- what the heck…" Maria's stuck, dude.
Altogether, we have a sleeping bag, and it's buried under all of us, so like hell any of us are actually usin' it!
"You- you know…" Sanae has her brows raised, as she beholds how snuggly Maria is. "Why's the tent this small."
"I wanted a discount…!" It was cheap, yo! "Freakin'-"
"You handed out over a million yen for Mew Shoes!" Sanae countered! "How expensive was this pocket space…!?"
"Not very." Genkan quietly decided. "...We didn't have the money then, that we have now."
Ha-chan wraps her arms around my chest. Then, Genkan rolls over onto her right side, gazin' at me.
Wh- holy shit, so much girl. Ha-chan's right cheek presses against my left. "Mmh."I feel her little coo through her chest, into my back. Holy fuck-
Genkan scoots closer, getting near my right cheek. "My breasts- are too big." Uuh!
"Are they?" Sanae asks!
"Yes." Genkan confirms! "Even like this-... they're brushing against things that they shouldn't be. I can't so simply get used to this."
"I think Brad likes them, though!" Ha-chan…! "You should take your shirt off…"
I see Genkan's brows raise! "You are a little menace."
"It's really warm in here!" Ha-chan confirms! "Uu- idea! Genkan- press your cheek against his other one!"
Genkan snorts. "I'm facing him- how am I going to do that-"
"How're we gonna sleep." Sanae wasn't sure how this would work!
"...We just do, I guess." Maria figures! "Wait-... someone's gotta shut the door."
The whah, the door? Wait…
Oh, right. There's a huge backdraft from behind us, 'cause the tent needs to be shut there! Freakin'...
"Uh oh." We're all freakin' stuck. I'm probably the like, only person who'd know how to work the back of this freakin' space-defying tent.
Shi- shif. Sanae's in a convenient position to go fiddle with it, actually, so she does that! "Lemme see…" Hoh.
Good thing, 'cause I'm freakin' stuck.
"Bra~d-kun." Hi, Ha-chan. "You should take your thing off." My thing. And- son…
"Hana." Genkan just gives her a look…! "Take your maid outfit off."
"Okay!" Didja really think that'd work, son.
Ha-chan breaks away from me to actually start undressing herself, clumsily fightin' against the floor to do so-
"Oh!" We hear Sanae! "...There's a like, little zipper here."
zi~p. Sanae zips up our tent's backside, dude. I wonder how that looks on the other side!
"Hana." Genkan sits up one eighth of the way to actually sitting up! That is, she pushes her elbow beneath herself a little. "I recommend you don't."
"But, I like being naked…" Ha-chan defends herself! "We all should be naked!" Wat a pure soul, dude. She reminds me of me when I was eight! That was a decade ago in-universe, and even longer if we don't count the fourth wall…!
"Good job…" Maria slides some of the sleepin' bag out from under Genkan, and takes it for herself amidst the chaos…!
...Slowly, Sanae creeps up on our side, although between Ha-chan's squirming and me an' Genkan snug up against each other, she has a little trouble!
"What are you doing." Genkan stares her down…! "No, shoo."
...Ha-chan is actually tangled in her maid outfit! "Uu- nh! Help…!" Freakin'- what'd you do-
"This looks like a complete mess!" Sanae declares!
"And we don't need you in it." Genkan scoots up a little- for some reason- and then looks down at her own chest again. "Ngh."
Sanae crawls further up, it sounds like…! "I dare you both, to stop me from pressing my chest against his back!"
woosh. Suddenly, Genkan swoops under her, and does it first. "I win." And- ooh…
"...Oh!" Sanae didn't expect that to end that simply!
At least the tent is somehow mostly clean, so I can be fine about lying on the ground…! But, man, grass is harder than you'd think…
"Are you comfortable, Brad?" Genkan senses the obvious!
"...Havin' you lie on me feels nice!" I admit! "The tent floor, however, doesn't feel nice!" It's especially hard to rough it like I usually do, when there's just like, twenty thousand people in this tent…!
...Genkan's arms wrap around me. "Change of plans." Uh-
woosh. Genkan rolls over- or tries to-
"Ee- oof!" She rolls into Maria, who's set up next to her-
"Wh- aah…" Sanae ends up getting embedded in us, and flopping onto me-
"Aw- yeah!" Ha-chan leaps onto us as a tangled mess! "Dogpile!"
"Ngh-" Sanae's just buried in my chest. "Oo- shit-"
thump! Ha-chan flops down on Sanae, and just- oof…!
"Mmgh-" Sanae's smushed into my kimono. Holy shit-
"Aa-" Genkan tries pullin' on me to keep me away from her- but-
thu- thu- thud! We all roll onto Maria! "Aaa~h!" Maria yells as we all tumble over her…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
This evening eventually turned out nicely, kind of! We're all almost dead, so another linebreak comes soon. Maybe!
Genkan, totally unsolicited, rolled her sweater up, and uh, I'm actually just in her boobs now. Not against the semi-lewd folds of her soft kimono; actually just-... between her breasts.
It feels fucking fantastic. They're like pillows- except softer. Especially 'cause she still has her cow bikini on, it's just-...
The only reason I'm not asleep with her right now, is 'cause Jesus…! Not- actually Jesus, I mean I'm really, really pent up.
"...You-..." Ohp, I tell lies, Genkan isn't asleep! "G- go to sleep."
"Ho- how." We're bein' quiet, 'cause everyone else might be asleep!
Maria is like, sleepin' on Sanae. Sanae got buried by her and Ha-chan, and is just, emburdened by snuggle.
"Aren't you comfortable?" She asks me!
"Ve- very comfortable!" I add! "Perhaps-... too comfortable!"
...Genkan exhaled, gazin' down at me. "Well-... ca- calm down." She requests…! "Your excitement-... it's infectious." Wat. Wait-...
I pretty much am just jittering with pent-up horniness. Hell- the last time I masturbated was literally like ten thousand years ago. Or, more accurately, half-of-this-fic ago, which was like a month and a half almost!
I'm also hugging Genkan really hard, because she's so damn soft.
"Nn-..." I tighten my squeeze for a moment, an' she just makes a noise. Aa- aw, she's hugging me back. Holy shit…
...Man, sleeping like this is hard. I think. Maybe I'll just be so horny that I just freakin' pass out. It is really comfortable.
"Brad." Genkan speaks up in the darkness of our tent. "...How did you sleep, on the outside?"
Aw. It's the good question. She's trying to distract us from ourselves with conversation!
It's really not working; I can feel her heartbeat through her chest, and her voice through her chest too, and I just love it.
"Very carefully." Wahaha!
...Genkan would pro'lly be givin' me a stare if she could! "Sounds… about right."
...I think I'm actually 'bout ta fall asleep. But- I'm still-... really-...
…
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
"sniff sniff" Wat…
Wait, where'd I sleep. I feel like wherever I slept roughed me up, a little!
Oh, right, Genkan boob. She rolled over at some point, and I ended up fighting the floor in my sleep, or something. But, I'm still near her chest!
"sniff" And, I'd probably just stick my head right back in- she looks so goddamn good- but someone's rubbing a fluffle against my face…
Maria gives me a snug look, as she harasses me with a fluffle…!
"Freakin'...!" Stop tryin'a make me sniff fluffles, son…!
I guess I'll lean up an' about and stuff.
Suddenly, there's generic blue light from the tent's front, where it looks out into a supposedly organic sky and grass.
Genkan looks really snug, just lyin' there.
...Aw. Ha-chan's in Sanae's lap, also looking snug as they both just kinda sit here.
Sanae's hair is all messy, and her shrine maiden outfit's a little disheveled. "...G'morni~ng." She also looks peaceful, dude.
Even leaning up, I feel overwhelmed just being somewhere so small- wit' so many freakin' chicks...
Aw. Now that everyone's not just lying everywhere… this tent is still really cramped, but it's not as bad as when we were all trying to stretch out! Freakin'... tent inventory item.
Still, right now I'm between Sanae and Genkan, which is not a bad situation at all!
"What time is it, actually…" I wonder! Probably morning, as the tent informs us with its weird not-quite daylight from the tiny patch of grass we can see.
"I 'unno." Sanae blinks lazily… "Hana's really cute, dude…"
"I'm cute!" Ha-chan echoes!
"sniff" Maria pokes my face with the fluffle, and it smells like dust and nugget-based comfort.
"Son, no." I don't want nugget-based comfort, however! "Help."
"I wonde~r." Suddenly, Sanae gains life energy, dude. "...How d'ya feel, sleepin' in a tent with nothing but a buncha cute girls?"
"...Genkan has big boobs!" I rephrase the premise! "And she's really soft."
"I'd bet." Sanae looks over at her sleepin' form too!
Man- it's so… something, seeing Genkan's skin so openly. I just wanna rub my face all over her.
Maria brushes the fluffle's forehead against Genkan's nose. "sniff sniff"
...Genkan doesn't take too long to look encumbered, an' wake up all of a sudden!
"Aa- tst…" Oh my god, dude. She sneezed! "Ma- Maria, why…?"
Maria is the fluffiest thing alive, dude. "We should wake up." Her suggestion was soft… "Before it's noon, or something."
...Genkan blinked a little. "Y- you're right. It'd be bad if we became nocturnal, or anything of the sort…" Would it, though. We're kinda burly as a party!
I crawl for the back of the tent, past Genkan an' Sanae an' Ha-chan's nice legs. Let's get outta here, dude!
zi~p. I unzip the back of it, and-
The Hakurei Shrine is nearly pitch black. I can't even see the middle of the room; or very far past the tent, it's just… there's just no light. Even the light coming from the tent's insides just stops some distance outside.
"Oh." I nod at this! "Someone turned out the sun…!"
...Maria instantly came up next ta me, lookin' weirded out! "What the heck."
"...Uh?" Sanae tilted her head!
Genkan comes up ta us next. "...There's someone ahead of us." Ooh.
fwish. Maria holds her frost staff out, and the tip of it glows with teal, ice-like light.
The light doesn't get really far, somehow. Y'know- isn't the thing about the Hakurei Shrine, that it like- repels stinky darkness…!?
I crawl out first, an' stand up!
Lookin' behind us, I look out the open door-... ah. More darkness. Wait…
I can see the ground and the surrounding trees, and the sky. There's just no lighting outside the shrine, and the sky itself is just black, wit' no stars or anything.
"...Um." Maria looks a little worried, clamberin' out with me! "This is spooky."
"Is it?" Oh! Someone's ahead of us!
We all look ahead, the other girls behind us slowly scramblin' outta the tent, and we see that the weird light-stoppin' darkness is gone.
The kotatsu still sits in the middle of the room, and-... aw! Merry's sittin' at it, dude!
"Aa- ah…" Sanae stands up, steppin' up between me an' Genkan an' Maria! "It's you! Merry, was it…?"
...Merry just nods once, an' starts to stand.
"Um." Maria holds her staff close an' tight. "...I- I think I remember you. We saw you for a little, at the temple, didn't we?"
Standin' from the kotatsu, Merry nods. "I believe you did. That-... feels so long ago, now." Hoh.
Merry comes closer to us, skirtin' around the kotatsu. "Brad."
"...Hi." I greet her! "Merry…!"
"You know her, huh…" Sanae smiled awkwardly! "She's kinda weird, but she's nice, isn't she?"
"...I think so!" I nod at Sanae! That was a deliberate way a' puttin' it.
Merry walks right up to me. Like, uncomfortably close. Da~h.
"Hello!" Ha-chan walks up next to us! "...I remember you!" She pointed at Merry!
Then, Merry steps forward, as if to just whump herself into me- and I step back-
Her face gets way too close-
FREAKIN GENSOKYO
Brad woke up in Gensokyo with a jolt, sitting up immediately.
"Shiieeut, I'm in a-"
Brad stepped into the Scarlet Devil Mansion for the first time.
Screw it. I'm done with it! Guess who the narrator is!? That's right, me! I'm-
My eyes widen. "That hair… the out-of-place clothes…" It's Matt, dude! "Hehe~y, Leego! How's it goin', son!?"
...Genkan? That's a curious name.
"I- I love you."
Tired gazes meet, and her brows curl up. "...I love you, too."
Hands cover my eyes, dude. "Guess who~!"
...Well. Considering I've like, never heard your voice before, this is going to be hard. "...Gerald."
"...It's Hana!" Oh. That's less of a hint, and more like, the answer!
"Wait!" Maria calls out for me while I'm halfway through the door!
...Me and my party look back at her, and Kirisame looks over at 'er too.
"I want to come with you." Maria asserts herself.
"I- I… I want to leave the village."
And so, S.S. Boner was etched onto the side of our craft.
"The- the- I don't life a' th' shrife…" Youmu ceases to make sense, hanging onto Reimu's right arm…
With that, Eirin turns to move past us-
-Y'know what Maria needs? She needs a big fluffy scarf…
How far up are we. I can see like… plains. Mountains, and like- is that the edge of Japan to the right there…!?
"Swift Brand!"
I can jump more, dude-
"When does it not…" Looking ahead, Genkan takes in a breath… "At least the lighting's consistent."
"...S'that what that outfit's called?" Koi tilts her head fluffily, before shaking it-
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
What the fuck. What the actual fuck. Uh oh. What was that. What was all of that.
I'm on my ass, now. Probably for good reason! I- stand back up-
"Brad…?" Genkan helps me get back up off the shrine floor. "Does- that normally happen, with her?"
"Nn- no!" That was-... what was that? I could like-... I could see shit, dude. I'd nearly forgotten a lot of shit in the past month, jeez! It feels like forever ago that I met Genkan and Maria- and is Matt just like, fuckin' dead or somethin'...!?
The tent behind us was gone, 'cause that's how it do. That was the intention of the product!
Merry's standing in the door of the shrine, looking out on the dark, still world.
It seems like you're special, too. I hear Merry's voice what the fuck. You remind me…
"Like-..." I start speakin'! "When she walked through me- I saw all my thoughts an' shit again! Like- when I met ya, Genkan- and-..." Oh, man.
"Hey, Merry…?" Sanae steps forward, towards her! "What'd you do?"
"Tha-... ooh." Ha-chan's a little frazzled, too! "I- I felt weird. When she did that, Brad-kun-... she felt a lot like you."
You did remind me, of me. Freakin'- Merry, get outta my head!
She turned around, facing inside the shrine again.
"What-..." Genkan floated towards her. "What are you?" Whaddaya mean, she's human.
"...Hmm." Merry looked thoughtful. "I-... I don't know. I'm me. I'll always be me. But…"
Something's wrong. I'm excited. I feel weird. Renko… I wanna see Renko again. I feel good… but, I'm scared, too…
Something's happening to me. I can't see where I'm going.
I feel empty… and- really full, too. I guess it's melancholy, or nostalgia. Nostalgia? Why that?
What is goin' on son I'm trippin'-
Merry stepped closer to us. "Genkan. Maria. Ha-cha-... Hana."
This friend circle is really cool. I didn't see anything like this, among the others. You did more than I thought, Brad. It's different than what I thought you were doing.
"Merry…" Wat. "You have somethin' to share wit' the class, Merry…!?"
She walked past Genkan, then the rest 'a us, moving back for the kotatsu.
"What'd you do?" Maria asked her! "Me- Merry?"
...Merry looked back at us. "It is-... it's beyond your-... it's beyond you, for now. I wanted to find Brad."
I point at 'er! "You wanted- I wanted ta find you, yo!"
"No, you didn't." Oof! She's right…! "Your path was interesting. You took such simple pleasure, in making your own way, and living so aimlessly. I envy you, Brad. Your life is really simple, but really fun. You should see your parents again, at some point. I'm sure they miss you to death."
"Merry…" Sanae is still all awkward! "You're a really weird girl, Merry. It kinda spooks me. You spooked me for sure, the last time we met…"
I love Gensokyo. I love Gensokyo with all my heart.
Brad. There is so much more to Gensokyo, than what you've already realized. I can't help telling you this. You might never see what I've seen… but, there's so much fantasy, so much beauty…
Merry has a huge smile, as she stares at me from across the room.
The rest of the world just feels like cold, dead space. Devoid of fantasy and life. Overwhelming nothing.
The fear that inspires youkai is born from this kind of darkness, this kind of nothing. But, they're ironic. These things born of fear are an example of the power of the human mind, and belief. They're confirmation of humanity's life and influence.
In light of all of Gensokyo's themes, and all the individual stories, great and strong, powerful and weak… it is truly a supercluster of the might, and the light, humanity holds. And, you can't have a bright, beautiful light without the dark that is youkai, and human fear.
You can't have beautiful stories, without them being heard by no one. Because, if everyone heard them, they wouldn't be beautiful.
What would you say this place is, Brad? Is Gensokyo the supermassive light, casting a shadow that is the outside? Or, is it a dark spot amidst the brightness of human civilization and structure?
Uuh. Da~h. Shit.
"I'd, uh…" I hafta speak to Merry, even though she can just mind rape me for no reason. "I'd call Gensokyo a bright light, yeah."
I see. That's cool…
Hoh. This is kinda freakin' me out, dude…!
We're all just quiet. Merry closes her eyes.
"I wanna give you a test." Merry grinned, all of a sudden. "A quiz, if you will. For you, and your cool friends."
"A-... test, huh…" I wonder. "Those were the worst on the outside, though…!"
Merry also seems amused at this! "They really were."
...Then, she kinda looks to the side.
Sanae gets really tense, and moves kinda in front of me! "Brad guy- be careful." Uh oh. "She's- collecting a lotta mana really fast-"
Maria exhales! "Oo- oh, my god-"
fzt- fzzt- fzt. Merry's left arm begins to sizzle with some kinda white energy, as she brings it up.
Her palm glows, as she aims it at us. "Let me…" She inhaled. "Let me see how you compare to me."
Is she gonna fire a laser, or some shit? Wait. Suddenly, idea…
I grab onta the good hammerspace bag, an' start to hold it up-
Merry's palm snaps up-
FWASH- FZZT- ZAP- ZAP! Sanae thrusts her gohei into the way of the white-teal beam that jolted from Merry's palm.
"Nnh-" Sanae quickly finds the baseball bat-like swing she used to deflect the beam wasn't enough, and her gohei's blown from her arms-
ZAP- FWAZAP! Maria thrusted her staff into the way, and ended up getting spun around instead a' doing anything useful! "Wh- ah!"
WOOSH. The blue-white, electric-centric beam snaps towards me, and into my held up bag...!
FWA- ZAZAZAP- ZAP, ZAP! Genkan stares at me with a pensive expression, as the laser slowly tapers off inside a' the hammerspace sack…!
"...Pft- hehehe~!" Merry can't contain a giggle! "Wo~w!"
Sanae has her gohei back! "The hell's the big idea!?"
"That attack…" Genkan didn't look happy, either! "I don't take kindly, to the amount of power you just used, there."
...Her giggling dying down, Merry gave them a more sedate look. "I wasn't going to hurt him. I was simply going to give you all a little puzzle to solve. But… he solved that quicker than I thought, I guess."
"That must have been quite the spell, then." Genkan drifted closer to her! "That was… no small amount of magic. I'm not about to just let you walk away, after something like that."
Merry shook her head. "Isn't it a little cold out, for this sort of thing?"
"It's more than cold enough." Genkan retorted! "...Do you have anything else to say?"
...Merry gave her a big smile. "You're a really good girlfriend."
Genkan snorted! "...Hm- hmm?"
"Anyway." Letting her hands fall to her sides, Merry kept her gaze up at Genkan. "I guess I'll start the quiz, then." Wait. Wasn't that fuck-off laser the quiz?
Fwi- Click! Oo- oh. Merry drifts a little into the air, then suddenly has on a whole different outfit.
She's in the camoumono that I'm currently wearing, an' has that freakin racecar helmet on- is that how ridiculous I look with that combination…!?
WHUNK. She swept around in nearly an instant. She met Genkan's side with Red Scare.
FWABOOM! A huge plume of fire erupted from the point of impact-
"Eh- nghah!" Genkan is sent fucking flying from the one hit holy shit-
Fwi- fwi- fwish! A salvo of like twelve talismans blow from behind Sanae, homing for Merry. "I knew it! Why're you going around jumping people!?"
Fwish! Merry leaps into the air, towards the talismans-
Woosh! She did a weird second jump, flipping forward over them as they arced up for her-
FWA- FWASH! As she fell for the floor, two massive, reflective orbs shot out from her- oh boy-
I run back, as Maria moves forward ta graze them, her staff held up, and Sanae rushes head with her-
FWAZA- FWAZABA~M! Both orbs explode into massive, white, reflective cataclysms of electricity and barrier shit as the girls near-
Whump! Maria hits the wall behind me! "Oa- a-..." Ho- holy fuck-
Wham- bam! Sanae rolls across the floor, fightin' to stand back up! "Oo- ow… you're- stronger, than last time…"
Click. Merry lands on the floor and just looks up at me, before standin'.
Fwi- Click! Now in Miko's outfit wit' the red cape, an' the nazi cap on, I hold up Lion's Lindwurm…! "Merry- what is this…!?"
woosh. She glides across the floor for me, Red Scare in one arm, and- her own reflective hanger thing in the other! The porcelain one!
CLI- CLANK! She spins up into me, and I stop her two hanger stroke with my own hanger-
Woosh! She leaps right over me, upside down for the one moment she does a fuckin' instant flip over me-
WHACK- KRACK! She slid both hangers into my ass, like instantly-
Bam. My- ow, ow, ow- my head met the shrine wall ahead-
"Heal!" Sanae thrust her gohei into the air-
Di- di~ng! Oh. Dude- Sanae knows cure!? Oh, we're done dude. Fight's over! It's all over, dude!
She healed me though- so I dunno if she's picking her targets wisely! My jaw stopped hurtin' at least. My face still kinda stings, from hitting wood.
Merry walks towards me, looking like she's poised ta get hit at any moment.
FWASH! Genkan freezes her, standing up some meters behind her! "You- damned-... ngh." She couldn't even think of an insult! Her sweater is slightly smouldering, and her exposed legs are really scorched, somehow.
"Bless!" Oh shit- Maria remembered her buff spell!
Ding, ding, fwish! She buffed Sanae, appropriately! "Wo- woah…!"
Za- zap! Ha-chan's on the rafters overhead, and she poked Merry with a zap of lightning from above! "Mmh…!"
I waltz up ta Merry while she's frozen, and reel my big dumb guitar hanger back like a bat! "Ho~h…"
WHAKRACK! I cleave it inta that ice-
WHAKRACK! Sanae cleaves her gohei down into it, smashin' it at the same time-
KRAKRACK! Genkan fuckin' spun dude- and smashed her right thigh against the bottom of the ice in a huge legsweep-
"Ha~h!" Merry roars, thrusting a hanger forward as we free her by kicking her ass-
FWASHING! She erected a fucking huge barrier- and it clips me.
ow ow ow holy fuck-
WHABAM! I hit the same fuckin' wall- 'cause she pointed the barrier right at me for freakin'-... no reason. I don't think I'm the most intimidating person here!
thu- thud. Ohp. I tried to move away from the wall, but just fell onto my face instead. That-... is-... fuck, ow…
WHA- KLACK! Ahead, Merry spins around, smacking Sanae outta the way-
THU- THU- THUNK! Spinnin' upsidedown in the fuckin' air- Merry's strokes of her metal hangers ram against Maria's side faster than she can dart back. "Aaa-"
FWASH! Genkan thrusted her arms up, to freeze Merry. "Stop!"
Then, Merry was behind her what the fuck-
WHAM. She smacked Genkan in the side with Red Scare again, ignitin' her again. "Ngh- aa- nnh!"
"Hup." Merry took into the air-
Fwi- Click! She's now got the nazi officer coat on- and Reimu's hair bow!
Vuu~m. Oh. There you are, Seikatsu. Thanks, I'm just- unable to move because of how hard I hit this wall…
WHISH! Sanae flew in, swinging her gohei inward-
"Yeah!" Merry did a huge, floaty backflip outta the way-
Cli- cli- cli- clink. From inside her skirt, a whole armory of plant hangers takes to the air- and only some of them look like mine-
WHA- WHA- WHA- WHA- WHACK- KLACK- BAM! Th- two things- hit me in the back while I was on the ground. The rest of the hangers went for everyone else.
"Za- phu- bnh- aah-" That- who was that? Maria…!?
"Oo- ow…" Genkan whines instead a' grunts. "This- fire-... stop-..."
"Holy shit!" Sanae blurts out! "Heal!"
Di- di~ng! Someone-... was healed! It was not me!
"Aa- ah." Genkan floats into the air- I can see her! "Tha- thank you! Now..."
Za- zap! Ha-chan pokes her hand down from the rafters again! "Stop it!"
"Eep!" Merry actually flinched from the tiny bolt!
KRI~NG! Genkan erects her huge blade of frost under Merry-
"Anh- ah!" Merry backflips outta it- but a huge line of blood splashed into the air past her-
WHACK! Sanae blindsides Merry with a wide gohei swipe, from behind her! "There!"
"Your ignorance…" Genkan's voice is all echoey, now…! "Your-"
WHACK- KLACK- KLACK! Merry fired a stream of hangers at Genkan, from her hands, once she landed.
"Gh- zz- ahza- ooh-" Genkan seizes up, from one that hit her. Oh- that's electrocution- what the fuck-
Now that I'm healed up enough I look up-
Maria's against the wall at the back of the shrine, jittering with electricity, barely able to stand.
"Now…" Merry floats into the air, this time outright positioning herself in the middle of the room. "I will show you all fantasy worth memory."
Gaps open in the air all around her, forming a shell around her body. Uh. Oh, fuck.
"Wh- ah!?" Sanae gaped! "Gaps!"
There're no eyes inside them, just dark. Wait-
KRI- KRI- KRI- KRI- KRI~NG! Oh. From the shell around Merry, spiky hilts of stop signs and other assorted road signs just out.
They hit the floor and walls, having extended way, way out from Merry.
"Nn-..." Maria's eyes are shut, her left arm punctured. "Gh- aa…"
CLA- CLA- CLA- CLACK! The signs all fall to the floor, cut from their heads by the gaps which zipped shut-
I bolt from the floor, and 'cause I ain't holdin' a hanger, I book it!
WOOSH! That was a lot of wind behind me-
"Lady Suwako!" Sanae yelled from somewhere I dunno where-
WOO- WOO- WOOSH. I duck and look back at the same time- as three fucking stop signs whirl over my head holy fucking shit-
Maria's in the corner of the room as I fuckin' fall over myself trying to get away from Merry- so I see her there!
"Fi- fire!" She stands from the corner, despite bleeding from her arm- I think a sign musta nicked her-
"Gkh- kaugh!" Genkan's coughing. Ah- oh, she got stabbed in the side of her stomach. "Fr- freeze- kh-"
Fwash! Only some magic musters around Merry's form, and her- woah shit-
SHUNK. I try to weave aside her, but a huge triangular sign fuckin' lops the side of me-
"Gh-" That- really hurts actually-
Thud. My whole body's limp, as I roll around on the floor, the impact of the sign just- was so fucking huge-
"Heal!" Thank you, Sanae! Jesus-
Di- di~ng! I see the magic form over my blurry vision-
FWOASH! Healing magic explodes up my body! Holy shit. I- have to sit 'n' process just- how good it feels not to be in pain.
Wait. I have an idea…
"Mmh…" Merry makes an mmh kinda noise, as she hovers in the center of the room. "You guys… even you, Sanae. You all have problems I can fix." She looked at the signs whirling in orbit around herself.
Maybe I really do wanna kill them. That'd-... what would that do? Son- what. That seems like the ideal way to take them with me...
Anyway- boys are back in town! Sanae's healing powers are actually really good! I stand back on up-
SHUNK. Oh- fhuck- fuck you Merry- a sign- my fleshy bits-
"Heal!" Sanae's next to me, eyes wide-
Di- di~ng- FWOASH! Bo-... boys, are back in town! Alright!
Maria's hiding behind Genkan, who seems to be healing up her own stomach wound with youkai power.
"Um." Sanae looks back at me. "So, um, big problem."
"Hi." I face her, moving to hide behind her!
She just kinda moves with me so that I can't! "I- I can't get in touch with Suwako- or, you know…" Oh. Well.
I still have my idea! "...Sanae- distract 'er." I propose! "I got a plan." It's not even a plant hanger plan. Wahaha, haha!
...How incredibly cursed, dude!
WOO- WOO- WOOSH- Merry twirls towards Genkan an' Maria, three huge signs spinning around her-
KRI~NG! Genkan erects a glacier blade in the way of her attack! "Leave us alone!"
Sanae runs up to Merry haphazardly! "Hey- idiot! I'm gonna beat you!"
Merry instantly turns to her! "He~h?"
Woosh! Sanae swings up at her, and I try to get myself into position. I've got my hammerspace bag ready, son.
Here's what I'm counting on! Merry shot that laser into my bag, right…!? Aa~w. If it's still there, you know what I'm gonna do…!
Overcoming moments of dizziness, probably from all the healing I've needed, I stare ahead-
KRI- KRI- KRING. A four-sign pincer catches Sanae right in the stomach. "Ghk-" Oo- oh.
THUNK- SHUNK. Maria's pinned to a wall by an arm. A 'slow, children' sign's impaled like her whole forearm. "Gh- aaa~h!" What-
SHU- SHUNK! Genkan's pinned to the wall right next to her, by the stomach and a thigh. "Nnh- nn- no…"
Merry floats towards me last, smiling. "Alright, Brad! I've come to a decision." She has an expression of smugness that'd be kinda fluffy if we weren't getting nearly murdered.
She's gonna just dodge if I like- shoot the goo too early. "And- that is…!?"
She folded her hands together. "I think I'll carry on for you, from here." She looked back, at Sanae- that is a lot of blood. Um. "Although… I might have a problem, now. Wait. Nah, Sanae won't get in my way later, hopefully."
She faced me again. "Anyway. It kinda makes me cringe to have to say this, but um, no one's gonna hear from you or your friends again. Sorry." Oh. Yeah, no biggie, son.
woo- woo- woosh. As I move against the Hakurei Shrine's front door, like ten stop signs are randomly propped into the air around me, sign bits pointed at me.
"Nh- no!" Maria yells from where she's pinned. "Yh- yhou can't!" Is she crying…? "St- stop! Sto~p!"
"Hraa~h!" Genkan just fuckin' roars-
KRI- KRI~NG! She actually just broke the signs holding herself in place, and stumbled from the wall. Like- holy shit, the bases of the signs are still in the wall. She must've let them pierce her through entirely. Blood drips from her stomach, onto the floor.
WHACK! She's hit in the face by a sign that whips back to meet her, the flat end blindsiding her.
CLUNK. Another one comes down before she can even get her bearings, slamming down on her head like a hammer.
"Br- Brad-..." She exhales, dropping onto her knees. "Brad-..."
thud. She thrust herself forward onto her stomach, face down on the wood.
...Y'know. Even despite all the pain Merry inflicted on me in this fight, I wasn't super pissed. Kinda annoyed, 'cause like, sparring where we get screwed with a little feels like a waste of time at best, aside from gettin' to use my cool magic and shit.
But, y'know, seein' that? And, all the other shit 'bout killin' us?"
"Yo, Merry." I call out ta her. "What's the big idea behind all this, anyway?"
...She faces me again. "...I don't really wanna say."
"Awh. Tell me, yo. I'm interested!"
...She blinks once! "Well. Since my powers are… showing me things, and unfolding, I've realized something. I can nurture them with things like this."
In the air around her, plant hangers form, as do gohei, mini-hakkeros, swords and big, huge guns.
"I can see so much." She smiled. "And, it's all really interesting. And- it's not like I'd be killing you guys. You'd just be… um, joining my party, so to speak. Yeah!"
Wait. Ooh, wait.
I've got a long con, son.
Next to the abandoned kotatsu on the side of the room, there's a broken pitcher of Kool-Aid. It might be broken, but the bowl part on the bottom is still kinda there, so there's still some Kool-Aid in it.
Ha-chan is sittin' on the rafters overhead, ignored. And, when Merry got hit by Ha-chan's tiny bolt earlier, she actually staggered a bit. She's weak to thunder.
What if I get Kool-Aid into Ha-chan, son?
"So you say." Let's try and bullshit Merry into giving me more time, first! "But, what defines a party, yo? Like- would it be one of those down to earth snug 'n' stuff sorta parties, or like-..." I can't help but grin!
Merry, fortunately, cannot smell the bullshit! "Oh? Um. I guess so! It's a really snug kinda party! I think you'd really like it! And- since your friends would be with you, they'd like it, too!"
Aw, cool yo! That doesn't help me at all!
So. By feeding my mana into NERF darts, I can direct their movement, right?
But. Here's the deal, yo. What if… I somehow extended my mana to the Kool-Aid bowl, and somehow made it float…? Like-... telekinesis!
First, I gotta get on some gear so Merry can't see where I'm lookin'.
Fwi- Click! I put on Miko's outfit and blue cape, the Mew Shoes, and my racecar helmet, with the visor down! Oh, man, it's hard to see. But, I can still make out the red of the Kool-Aid!
"Yo, Merry." I ask a question, now able to stare dead at the Kool-Aid bowl! "Say. How'd you tank all those hits earlier?"
"Ah?" Merry tilted her head back. "Ooh, yeah. Well… let's just say, my body's kinda weird now. Weird things have been happening to me-... like, to my head, and to me, ever since I've discovered more of my powers. It freaks me out a lot… but, recently, I've started to feel better about them."
"Aw, yeah?" Alright. Since I got the magic cape on, I am as magical as I can get!
I close my eyes- not that Merry can see- and hold a hand open. Aw, there's my mana. Let's see…
"Yeah." Merry admits! "It's let me really see things clearly, I think. Like-... I know I might seem crazy, beating you guys all up like this, but, it's for something bigger."
"An' what's that?" Merry's practically givin' me all this time- and soon I won't really be able to focus on her.
She smiled genuinely. "It's for Gensokyo. It's for fantasy."
"Ooh." Alright. I got a lot of shifty energy in the palm a' my hand an' stuff. "Could ya explain?"
She nodded. "Oh, yeah. Um… so, like… I feel like, if I could see as much as possible… I could maybe like, find out how to spread something like Gensokyo farther. We're trapped inside the Hakurei Barrier here, right? What if, someone could create another Gensokyo? Or, something like it, at least?"
I can like, feel my mana move across the ground, it's weird! Focusing on it is so hard-
"Brad?"Ah- fuck-
"Ah- yeah!" Damn it- focus on the trail a' magic- "I could see that! Hard for me-... to wrap my head around."
Something's tellin' me to hurry it up. My gut…!
"Really?" Merry snorts! "I feel like you'd have already suspected it before. I think there are more pocket worlds out there, like this one. So, it's possible. And, I think they're started by people like me. People with vision. People with a vision, too. Hehe."
...She paused. "Do you want tea, or something? We can postpone the whole 'me and your friends meshing' thing until we're done talking, I guess."
"Ah, no." Dude- moving magic along the floor is fuckin' hard…! But-... it's getting there-... "What do ya think- of the barrier?" Let's throw out a random question to keep her talking!
"...What kinda question's that." She grins! "But… you know, maybe you're right. It'll be hard to find someone like Reimu on the outside. I've heard about how young this place really is, too. It's only a hundred thirty years old, about. Can you believe it?"
"...No~." Insert CD-I Mario 'no' here…!
"Oh, man." She starts to gush for no reason! "I get so giddy just thinking about it. Maybe a giant, night-time city would be cool. Or, maybe a town with an unending sunset. Maybe that'd be too corny… but, it'd look really cool. Think of the city lights!"
I ain't thinkin' about anything but this magic trail, son! "Yeah, dude!"
"Brad. What's your favorite setting?" Merry asks me! "Personally, lights make it for me. I'd love to spend many nights, under really cool lights."
"Me too!" Lights are cool! "And Kool-Aid!"Must get Kool-Aid to Ha-chan…!
Ohp- the trail is finally there. It- it's like I can feel my hand touchin' the bowl, too. Hoh, damn…
I like, cup my hand under the bowl. Now… to super lift it. Oh man. I can't fuck this up, son.
"...I guess fruit juice is nice." Oh, you better believe it, Merry… "Did you know? Reimu can eat sweets, without getting fat."
"Sweets!" My IQ must seem to have dropped by like twenty points to her…!
"...Yeah." Merry grins back! "Do you like, really need to pee, or something? You seem distracted… like- like you're doing a dance, or something."
"Yeah, but nevermind that!" The bowl pauses in the air, as I speak, trying to slowly bring my arms up…!
What I'm doing is like-... I'm trying to amplify the movement in the air of the bowl… and what I'm amplifying is my hand's push against it. It-... it's about as I expected after some thinking but goddamn is it hard to focus…
"Uuh. Daah. Ooh." I revert to my basest instincts! "Merry-" I got nothing…!
"Yeah?" She tilts her head!
"I love Genkan!" Just popped into my head! "Why'd ya-... go and hurt her…!?"
Merry cringed! "We- well… you'll all technically need to be like, super exhausted, or actually dead, for me to do what I wanna do. Sor-... sorry again. Like-... even if it went wrong, I'd make it up to you guys."
Nice, Merry. Very cool. Cool and good…!
At this point, I'm striking a fookin' Shakespearian pose, as I bob and jolt the super shallow kool-aid bowl into the air, getting it near Ha-chan's rafter. She's just gazing down at us owlishly, lookin' afraid…!
"What if I don't wanna be a schizophrenic…!?" A lot of my old reused jokes are popping into my head!
Merry snorted! "I- I'm not a schizophrenic! ...I think!" Awh that's real reassuring. "But-... look. Sometimes, when you want more, you have to take risks. And, I thought, for all of us, this was the perfect risk to take."
"What if I liked my blood in my body!?" Y'know…!?
The bowl is almost there holy shit-
Click. It dinks against the side of the rafter up there- and my whole body jerks super hard to make its balance keep.
Ha-chan jumps, lookin' down at it when she heard it!
"What the…" Merry watches me convulse in place! "Look- ah… man. You shoulda let me like, beat you up. You wouldn't need to pee when you're with me." That is the fucking weirdest offer of power ever.
"Re- really, now…" Even I can't believe she said that!
...She blushes a bit! "Se- seriously! If we weren't talking, you wouldn't need to pee right now!"
"Well!" Son. "...That's my fetish."
...Merry just kinda gapes at me!
"Oo- ooh…" Ha-chan has accepted the bowl of Kool-Aid. I repeat: Ha-chan has received the bowl!
Now that she has it, my focus drops entirely.
I rip my racecar helmet right off, and toss it aside. "The~re we go."
Thu- thunk. Merry watches it tumble off. "Wait- what part of that was your fetish. Needing to pee, or me combining our powers?"
"Hey, Merry." I can now discuss stuff with you! "I got an idea fer ya."
"Oh?" She blinked!
"How about, instead of killing people so you can maybe like- make another Gensokyo or whatever ya wanna do-" I hold up my hammerspace bag, as if gesturing subconsciously with it! "Maybe you can do that all without killing people!?"
Merry shook her head. "You don't see what I see. You and your friends would continue on, in my fantasy." Her eyes became violet and gold, for a moment. "I'll make sure of it. I'll… I'll make sure you're the main characters. I'll make sure you're all together."
"Mmh…" Ha-chan has ingested the trace amounts of Kool-Aid!
And, to be honest, I really don't know what Merry's goin' on about! But it sounds a lot to me like she wants to murderize us!
za- zap, zap. Oh, boy.
Ha-chan floats down, form aglow cyan and teal. She looks really excited, dude!
"Well, Merry." I shake my head. "I kinda think you're just bein' a huge fuckin' asshole!"
She snorted! "...Re- really. Well… you don't hafta see things my way. You'll know I was right, in the end."
"Yeah?" I grin at Ha-chan…!
...Merry sees my eyes, an' hears the ominous buzzing sound, and turns around.
"Zappity zap zap, Merry!" Ha-chan holds up her index finger, bringing it towards Merry's nose!
woosh. Suddenly, the ten signs around me snap to face Ha-chan-
But, it's too late, son. Ha-chan boops Merry on the nose.
THWASH- FWUM FWUM FWUM- KRABOO~M! A blinding, white light of electric power explodes out, dancing between every metal sign.
My whole body slides back towards the shrine door-
FWAAA~SH! It met Merry's inner magical energy, blooming and booming.
Thump! I bounce on my ass- off the floor, because the huge ass electrical explosion completely rocked the entire shrine! "Ooh- fuck!"
...With the wall as leverage, I get my bag ready!
ZAP- ZAP, ZAP. KROO~M. Like the echoing recursions of a thunder boom smackin' some soundwaves, the shrine shakes, and jolts of teal plasma fill the air.
"Oo- oouh…" Ha-chan didn't die somehow. She's just comatose, behind Merry! "Ow…"
The signs are all scattered on the floor. They jitter, but Merry can't seem to lift them.
She's facing me, way closer than before, eyes wide, whole body comically only slightly charred; lightly roasted, dude.
"Yh-..." Her jaw is locked, electricity jittering across her body. She's stunned, son. The most fair and balanced of all statuses.
I fluff the bag in the air like it's a pillow case or bed sheet, an' start to tilt it towards Merry! "Hey, Merry."
She gives me a wide-eyed, glowing gaze back, but says nothing.
"Assfuck is cancelled." I tilt the bag forward, and slip my fingers in a little, aiming it at Merry, searching for-
FWAAM- ZAP- ZAP- ZAP- FWASH! The flare of white lightning meets Merry right in the face and chest, piercing her.
"So- this-..." She seethes out words, amidst the blinding light that punctures right through her being. "This is the soul-... of someone- special-..."
The beam fades out abruptly, ending instantly.
thud. Merry just flops onto her back, lumpified!
...Well. I think we won!
Sanae's actually up, just leaned against a wall, as Seikatsu heals her slowly. Her whole body's shakin'.
I look over at Genkan- oh. She got closer than I thought she did!
She's on the floor near Merry, streams of tears down her face, her arms spread out. She'd crawled over to us, her right cheek against the ground, and a trail of blood behind her.
Maria's mouth is agape, watching us from where she was pinned against the wall.
fwi- woosh. Suddenly, there's more color all around us.
The black-grey ambient around the shrine is gone. So's all the environmental damage!
...Reimu and Marisa look up from the kotatsu in the center of the room, startled by our presence!
"What." Reimu blinks rapidly! "What."
Marisa chuckled! "The- the fuck…!? Wuh oh!"
I whip out a potion- and drop into a knee slide- which is a mistake 'cause that hurts- but whatever!
"Uh, yo." I lean forward ta get Genkan so I can feed her potion stuffs. "How, uh, good are ya?" She doesn't look very good, so...
...I hafta help her roll over, and she sees the potion in my hands. There's burn marks all over her skin that- ooh ow they're really hot, the fuck.
Pop! Opening the potion, I bring it to her lips-
-and, her telekinesis steals it, finishing the job! "Mmgh…"
She downs all the liquid in like, literally a second. I can see the burn marks start to heal and flake off-
Crack! The potion bottle breaks, falling from her mouth as she lunges-
Ooh! She- grabs me real hard!
"He- heal." I hear Sanae in the background-
Di- di~ng! Dunno who got healed. Maybe Maria.
"I-..." Genkan exhales. She does so a couple times. "You-... you have no idea, how close I was to dying. These- shrine grounds…" Oh. Oh. Wait-
"Mmh." She kisses me really hard- and I jerk my head back on reflex, but her grip is otherworldly- "Mhm."
And- I just kinda lax- wait, what's she doin'-
Oh. That's-... so that's what a kiss with tongue feels like. I hardly have breath after all the rushin' around I was doin'- but-...
"Mwah." She breaks her kiss with me, our saliva between our lips messy. Also- her body's just shakin'.
...Floating onto her legs, she placed me in standing. She looked around the shrine, before-
WOOSH! She- snapped towards one of the doors, to pull me somewhere else!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
Her random choice lead us to the kitchen, actually! It was the closest door…
"Brad-..." Genkan looked shaken, and jittery. "My gods. We both-... we could have both died there. Why did that even happen?"
Then, she gazed off into space. "...That- pseudo-human trash. If I see her again, I will kill her. De- death would be too kind- I-..."
...Then, she meets my gaze! "Brad. How do you maintain seeming calm, amidst all of this? Are you simply used to this?"
I shake my head! "Kinda. But-... it's probably also the adrenaline!" Honestly, my heart's also beating so fuckin' hard. Like- I feel like somethin's wrong, kinda, but that's probably just my blood pounding my body into action!
...Idly, Reimu shuffles into the room in her socks, giving us a plain look.
Instantly, Genkan grabs onto me again! Jesus- she was so afraid for that moment!
"...Uh." Reimu gives us an awkward look! "What the heck're you two doing."
...Genkan relaxed, when she realized Reimu wasn't hostile!
"I dunno!" I think Genkan's first instinct was to try an' hide us, or something.
"Get back in the main room." Reimu gestured for us all! "I've gotta interrogate everyone over this." Oh, boy!
...So, we kinda meander in after her, lookin' around-
Merry's standing again. She's just- standing, and up and about after that.
Fwi- fwish. Genkan creates an ice gauntlet, and just walks at her.
Reimu steps in the way! "No more killing eachother."
"She tried to kill us." Genkan states. "I will kill her."
"Hey." Sanae stepped up to her, next! "Mercy."
"Damn mercy." Genkan's still shaking. "I cannot rest well- with this vigilante on the loose. Please, let me kill her."
"Not until we straighten everything out first." Reimu holds up a hand placatin' like. "Okay?"
...Genkan huffs, and lurches away a little. "Fi- fine."
...With us all just kinda standin' around except Marisa, Reimu speaks up! "Alright. What happened?"
No one says anything! But then, Sanae fills in. "Merry there- the blonde lady- showed off some spooky powers, and tried to kill most of us. She didn't want me, just these three." She gestured to my party! "But-... she used something a lot like you-know-who. Outside world's signs and all."
Merry looked away.
...Reimu nodded. "Apparently had some kinda pocket space thing going on, too. Alright, what's your story, 'Merry'?" She focused on Merry, next.
"It's all as she says." Merry nodded. "I'm sorry for causing trouble."
"Really." Reimu leaned back, and sighed. "Not only did you have to start shit in my shrine, but you had to do it without even using danmaku."
Merry met her gaze again, frowning hard. "I'm sorry."
"If you were sorry, you wouldn't have done it." Reimu insisted. "Considering how rattled everyone here is, what'm I supposed to say? Why'd you even do it?"
...Merry shook her head. "Nn- no reason." Hold up, now.
"Hey." I step up ta Reimu. "...Lemme talk ta her."
...Reimu just kinda steps outta the way, happy to hand off the work! "Don't do anything dumb."
"Ye." Alright!
I step up ta Merry.
"I'm cool with runnin' around with you." I smile. "I'm cool wit' ya showin' off. What the hell were you really tryin'a do, though?"
"I was going to take you and your friends' souls." Merry stated it clearly! "...And- like- with them, I could've placed you somewhere new- which was why I wanted to keep you with me! I could- not only rebuild your bodies, but-"
"Hey, Genkan." I turn back to Genkan! "...How close were ya to dying, after that?"
Genkan frowned. "...Pr- pretty close. If you hadn't treated me before the others… well. Um. You see-... I'd used up much of my last reserves, trying to get to you, in the end. I wasn't successful. But-... but nothing. I would have died, to save you." She shut her eyes.
An' Maria seemed mostly okay after that, if frazzled and bleeding a little. But, not too much. She wasn't gonna die, for sure.
I turn back ta Merry. "We~ll."
Y'know. Not really sure what ta say. It's not often that I'm like, y'know, angry.
Genkan nearly died! And, if she did, me- and Maria- would be the only people who really cared a whole lot.
Takin' a moment, and keepin' myself composed, I get closer. Oh, boy, the weight of what coulda just happened is hitting me.
And what was that, Merry said? That she'd 'make it up to me' if something went wrong? Aww. I'm sure she'd have cared a whole lot, just-...
"Merry." I grin at her. "You are lucky. You are fucking lucky."
"A- am I?" She smiled back.
"'Cause yaknow…" I step closer, getting in her face. "If Genkan actually died from that…"
Genkan coulda died from that. Y'see- me? Fine with me, I don't gotta be around for the aftermath of that shit. Maybe. ...Well, Genkan wouldn't deserve that-...
But, her dying? And to someone- like fuckin' Merry's random ass whims?
She tries ta take a step back, but I bring up my skinny, freakin' muscleless arm.
I gently wrap my left hand around her neck. "Reimu wouldn't be able to stop me from doin' somethin' stupid."
...Reimu came up along our side, making sure I wasn't actually choking her. "...And, if I did?"
...I don't even know what ta say. "I wouldn't stop."
Merry seems like she's on the verge a' crying, as she meets my glare.
Man. Anger is weird. It's really self-feeding. The thought that makes you angry is really vivid- recurring to you again, and again, and thinkin' about that just makes you angrier.
What if I'd rolled her over, moments ago, and she was just dead? All those burn marks…
Merry impaling me into nothing before her smouldering, dying body.
An' all we wanted to do was-... was nothing, we wanted to wake up.
Some fucking idiot just-... without even knowing her, coming up and-
And, what's that say about us? Placing attention and time in one another- and one just dies, to some worthless murderer?
Was that worthless? Was it worth loving her? Was it worth her loving me? It's hardly even been a fuckin' month.
...I think shit like that's how criminals are made. Real criminals.
Every dismal, shitty little thought is another shifted gear for this anger only I feel.
And, it kinda feels good, in a way. Really draining. I guess in a way, 'cause this is like… to me, a pretty justified reason to be mad.
"Merry." I sigh. "You seem like a cool girl, and all. But, this was fuckin' retarded. Do you feel retarded?" Despite all of that, all I can use is dumb words. Nothing I say-...
"Ye- yes?" She blinked.
I snort. "Good, 'cause you should. You gonna do it again?"
"...No." She shook her head. "I- I… I know what I did wrong, now."
"What'd you do wrong?" Let's hear that.
"...I- I didn't think, what I did could have accidentally, like-..." She paused. "I- I was also wrong, to think-... that, I was just-... above someone else's way of doing things. But-..."
She met my eyes again. "If I had more power-... if I'd succeeded instantly to begin with, would any of you had a problem? Once the relocation was complete…"
Huh. Heh, hahah. Yeah, 'course. Well, "your power wouldn't stop me from being angry."
I have a lot I want to say right now, shit. Like, 'there will be a tombstone with the name 'Maribel' engraved on it' kinda shit.
If she just killed Genkan-... why couldn't I do the same? One might pose the question, "is any relationship deep enough, for me not to tarnish it"?
How self-feeding that'd be. I'd be destroyin' myself, and destroyin' everyone else who dared to try. If that's not failure, I dunno what is.
"...But." She exhaled. "What I did made you all upset… and, disturbed your dream. What I did was therefore, retarded. Stupid. I didn't know the risks. This is the first time I tried seriously-... taking anyone."
"So." Maybe we're makin' progress. "If Genkan died, how would you have even made that up to me?"
...Merry smiled. "I- I would have-... invited you, to my new world."
Ah. Aw, yeah. Makes a lotta sense. I'd be totally cool with that, yes dude.
I reel my right arm back, and punch her in the face as hard as I possibly can.
Fwish! My body flares with amber light for a moment. "Gh-" Merry actually received the punch, reeling back after it met her nose.
WHACK! Reimu's gohei meets my head, and I let myself fall over.
thud. But, pain really doesn't feel so bad right now. Hell, I hardly let it get to me when I'm in a good mood.
"Hey." Reimu points her gohei down at me. "What'd I say?"
I just ignore her, sittin' there on my side on the floor.
"Hey, Reimu." Marisa speaks up. "...Let 'em both be."
...I get back up, an' Merry frowns at me, her nose all red.
"U- um…" She doesn't know what ta say.
"If I had my way," I exhale hard. My body wants ta sob, but I'd rather not. "If I had my way, it'd be thirty more punches. As many punches as I could throw, 'till my arms feel like falling off."
I want to be angry, about this. Vindicated anger is recursive; like a short-circuit. I keep thinking about how Genkan could be just- dead. No goodbye, no more conversations-... no more love.
True failure.
And, I could hide that. Y'could say that's not my fault. But, that's true failure. Failing to protect her-... failing to stop that loss of potential, of future.
Nothing else could define failure to me.
I reel my fist back again, and Merry winces. Yeah, you better fucking wince.
"Like- look." I sigh. "Let's say I understand, s'yer first time doin' this shit... "
I almost punch her. I stop my fist before her face, and she jumps.
"Still, there was a risk ya coulda killed someone." I'm sure, without hearing my thoughts, I'm just some fuckin' asshole about to punch this stupid-... stupid fucking girl.
"Do you think there wasn't a reason I never got that attached ta anyone? It's so I don't have to bawl my eyes out, when a stupid piece of shit like you comes along, all hurdedur about this shit, and up an' fuckin'- arbitrarily- just wastes someone. Next time, know what you're fucking doing. Fuck you."
I think back. To that time Genkan first kidnapped me, and I coulda been unkind to her, and warded her off with fire.
I think back to that time in the village, where her head was seconds from being pierced by that weird thing in that bar.
I think back to that time Maria almost died in that factory, on one of our first adventures. Imagine that.
Right now, Merry is the embodiment of all of that.
I- I want to hurt her. I'll ram my head into hers- and knee her- and-
I grin, 'cause my jaw clenches more than anything. But, the fact I'm just grinnin' after all that's still funny to me. I kind of just- tilt myself back, and hold my head. Aw, now I got a headache now, too. But, I can't complain too bad. S'been awhile-... like, when was the last time I was ever like this?
"Motherfucker." I just seethe in place-
"Um." Genkan comes close to us. "...Brad?"
My hand on Merry's neck is so tense, but I'm still not choking her. "...I- I'd follow ya to the ends of the earth- and beyond-... 'cause I couldn't let something that monumentally stupid go."
Everything I say- just makes me angrier. Holy shit. Everything I say just makes me think more about how fucking stupid this is- it really does just feed itself. It's like a fire.
It's like how not-angry I was this entire fic just boiled over. I seethe, I sob, I wrap both my arms around Merry's neck and just fucking glare.
I don't even have words to describe what I'm feeling anymore. Any corny, shitty combination of words would just devalue what I feel right now. My face right now's words enough.
Nothing else matters right now. I'm fucking angry.
...So, we stand here like this, for awhile. Like… awhile. Awhile of just standing, me basically crying, and Merry crying back.
My body shakes, now and then. All this raw emotion.
It takes awhile. I stop thinking about why I'm angry, and the fire fades. My body's still jittery, shaky, and I have to breathe through my mouth 'cause my nose is all clogged.
"If only you could feel how angry I am." I tell Merry. "...He- hehe. You wanted to feel an' see all kinda shit, right? You see how angry, I am? You see this?"
"I-..." She shakes. "Ye- yeah. Nn- not- not entirely, no- of course- but a little-... I- I'm sorry."
You're sorry, huh.
...I let go of her, and just sigh.
I flip her a middle finger. "Fuck this. Fuck you." I wish I could take every idiot like you and-... just like, bury them.
Merry's lucky she's so smart. If this was anyone dumber, they'd deserve to be dead. I'm no god, but some people don't deserve to walk beside me.
Now, I'm just disappointed. The angry urge is gone; the urge to choke her, poke her eyes, knee her, toss her over- just-... I- I couldn't feel right about it, now. Just- damn it, damn it…
Whatever...
Turning away, I see everyone. An' lemme tell ya: there ain't no happy faces. Lotsa small looks, an' open mouths.
If I look at Genkan- I'll just work myself up again. Maybe I really will hurt Merry.
I regret not trying harder in that last fight. Pain should've been nothing. I should've taken her eyes; I should've been tossing potions, shoving the bottle glass into her skin- using my nails-
I trot over to the kitchen, to cool off.
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
...Boy! I sure was angry!
Genkan followed me in here, sittin' across the table from me!
"...Are you okay?" That's the first thing she asks…!
"I dunno!" I grin back, wipin' my tears! "I think so!" Ho~h, man. I feel like I want to be more angry, too. I wanna just keep going 'till I'm exhausted- but, the day's young, and that'd be kinda lame. My point about death an' shit still stands, though. No one died in the end, bu~t, yaknow.
"...Do you bottle up your emotions?" Genkan asks.
"Probably!" I mean, time an' distractions are good, dude. "I'd like ta think I'm usually pretty patient in general."
Yeah. I like to try and hide it! But, that would've just killed me inside.
"Compared to just now, you are." Genkan agreed, yo. "Perhaps too patient." Hoh. I dunno.
...I grin! "Well, that was a thing that happened!"
"Are you just-..." Genkan raises her brows. "Are you just going to try and ignore this?"
"Pft. Well, yeah." I mean, that's the modus operandi, at least when it comes ta things I'm usually mad about.
Not that I get mad, really. I mean, even when your anger's justified, no one likes a moody mump, dude. "I might make Merry the butt of jokes for like the next two years, but aside from that… hoh."
After all, no one knows the gears of anger which riled me up. Only me. And, I'd just get angry trying to make people understand. They're just mine, made only for me.
...So. That's what Suwako tried to scratch, when she spoke about strength.
Yeah, fat lotta strength that gave me! I'm really tired, now. And I just woke up!
"I don't think you should ignore it." Genkan immediately undoes the 'only for me' thing I thought to myself. "...Even-... if it's just with me. You should talk about it."
...That's, uh, quite a thing ta say. "If there's a time an' a place, I suppose so. Ya wouldn't mind?" I have a feeling she'll end up minding anyway. Here's hoping I can make her forget!
After all, that's what people are good for. They always forget, an' you always gotta remind 'em. 'Cept, of course, when ya don't wanna. Wait- shit, that just makes me angrier. Whoops!
"If I did, I wouldn't be offering." Genkan smiled at me. "...Complaining about our woes and angers is what me and my closest sisters would do. And-... it felt like your anger ran deep."
Oh, it ran deep, alright. That reminded me of things on the outside I was actually angry about. Not that I plan ta bring them up.
"Anyway." Man, I'm worn out, now… and it feels kinda good. "...I dunno what to do now!"
"Take a break?" Genkan suggested. "...As in-... hmm. Being stranded in the Hakurei Shrine isn't convenient, I realize…"
I like how being in the Hakurei Shrine counts as being stranded.
...Maria pads inta the room, followed by Sanae.
Sanae immediately bows. "If- if I hadn't lost contact with the gods-... that wouldn't have come close to ending the way it did."
...Genkan shook her head. "It isn't your fault."
She sprang back into standing. "I feel like it is, though. Especially after I talked all that big game- and there was just- nothing I could do. It brought back some bad memories."
Bad memories, huh.
She came up to the table. "So-... I'd like to make it up to you guys. Somehow."
...None of us have any good suggestions, however!
Maria's starin' at me. Aw…
...In the silence, Merry pads into the room next.
She has her eyes nearly shut, crying. "Uu- um…"
Everyone turns to her. No one's happy with this…!
Coming up to me, she holds out something. "Br- Brad. He- here…"
Ah. It's her VCR hanger, that she used back at the temple.
"You-... you deserve this- more than I do." Some of her tears fell onto it. "I- I'm sorry."
...I take it plainly. "Neat." Plant hanger, made of VCRs. Who made this, why, etcetera. Very funny joke, dude.
...Oh, there's even a note on it, telling me about its details. Let's read it together, dude!
'Sorry for nearly killing your girlfriend.
The item's stats are as follows:
Boötes Void
50% Electric resistance.
50% Dark resistance.
50% Space resistance.
Immunity to blindness and stunning.
You can shoot VCR tapes at enemies. I upgraded them to record the enemy's element onto each tape that hits them, so you can pick them back up and use them like magic bricks.
Electrical damage on hit. May stun and shock.
VCR tapes drain target's magic defense.
Randomly casts Radial Shroud. Blindness resistance stops this. Can be turned on and off using the 'next track' button on the midsection.
Included spells:
Gravity
Astrology
Geometry
Plasma Cage'
Well, it's not a bad weapon, at least!
...I look up from the note, an' Merry is just gone. Wise decision; my first test-target was 'bouta be her!
"Huu~." I let out an exhale again, yo. "What a horrible night ta have a curse!"
"Freaking…" Sanae grinned. "Dude."
"We're taking you somewhere quiet." Genkan insists! "I refuse to let you brood on your own."
"Hoh…" Is that so… "Y'know where we could go, yo? The Scarlet Devil Mansion."
"...I think we have different definitions of the term 'quiet'." Genkan supposed! "But… if you really feel like it, sure."
"I mean, if we wanted, we could just idle in a bedroom all day." Wait- I'm only now understanding the implications of what I said uh oh!
"...A- ah." An' Genkan jumped to the same conclusion…! "Not a bad idea, then." O- oh.
"Hopefully the fairies aren't a big problem…" Maria lampshades the obvious!
But, y'know, we can just curbstomp 'em, I'm sure.
...Suddenly, Sanae speaks up! "The mansion's a really fun place!" Aw, yes dude! Wait- how's she know about the mansion. "...You guys wouldn't know it, but I have a lot of friends there. Can I come too…!?"
"Su- sure." I dunno why Maria accepted, but she did!
...Aw. Now Ha-chan's in the kitchen, moving towards us…
Hoh. She gets close to me, and is just quiet. I'm reminded of a cat…!
"Hau~." I yawn myself. Hoh, shit.
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
END OF CHAPTER 100
Brad, the Fluffle Slayer, Fairy Slayer, Accidental Human Slayer, Robot Demolisher, Ph. D in Plant Hangers, Scarlet Liberator, Village Liberator, Eientei Crucible, Sinker of the Flufftanic, Factory Disassembler, Assembler of the Legendary Air Ride Machine, Sky Climber, Amateur Espionage Practitioner, Illegal Fairy Harborer, Conscientious Party Member, Winter Warrior, Village Revolutionary, Has Forgotten What Half of These Titles Stood For, Holder of Too Many Titles - Aw, Genkan gave me a summary! I can change elements, skills and resistances depending on the situation! Weaknesses vary…!
NON-EQUIP SKILLS:
Lucky Star - Non-elemental magic that does very random damage to one target. The star is summoned from above, and simply coasts into people.
Scent Pillow - A spell taught by Koakuma. The end-game strat, dude.
World's Wimpiest Fireball - A spell learned from a book given ta me by Patchouli. Not very good for anything…! May dry out targets.
Lumen - Low-grade holy spell that eats mana. Requires a source of holy to actually be cast. Homes in on an enemy and deals a burst of mediocre holy damage.
Double Jump - The good skill. Allows the user to completely cancel their falling momentum and jump again.
NERF Marauder Combo - A wimpy, back-and-forth slapping motion, one hand on the very bottom tip of a hanger's handle. Relies on the weapon itself to just bean a person's head! The way it works allows attacks to be chained together easier.
Combo Length - Brad's combo length without equips is one. He's really good at this, dude.
Reflex IX-1 - No strike combo finisher! Reeling the plant hanger over his head, Brad charges it with magic and just fuckin' whunks it down like a club! Weapon effects are stronger. Attack is stronger with great hangers. Known as Cleave to swordsmen…!
Secret Strike AS-1 - One strike combo finisher. After a single swing, Brad can drive the hanger back under the arm that swung it, pivoting himself around and getting in a sneaky gut thrust on an opponent with the weapon's tip. Works best with great hangers. May hit twice. Known as Tonfa Turnaround.
Barrel Break IX-2 - Two strike combo finisher. Reeling the hanger back like a bat, Brad freakin' clubs a guy across the head with it! Or, tries to. Stagger and knockback potential! Known as Batter Up to people who aren't Brad!
Switch Shot EX-3 - Critical move. Learned in a moment, after being inspired by Shou's tonfa-related technique. Seeing an opportunity, Brad uses the back of a plant hanger's screw region to pull an opponent past himself by the neck, before rolling the hanger over and into their head. Works best on weaker foes. Known otherwise as Essence of Tonfa * Third Gear. Works best with smaller hangers.
Noob Combo - Blindingly, alarmingly fast unarmed ""melee"" """"combo"""" that does next to no damage, but prioritizes striking weak points and chaining into many, many consecutive attacks.
Pivot Claw - Many strike unarmed combo finisher. Once his enemy is on the ropes, Brad pivots on a shoe, doing a one-eighty rotation with a backwards kick towards his enemy's gut. Might make him lose balance, 'cause it's a whack attack!
INVENTORY:
= = ► EQUIPPED ITEMS - BRAD:
WEAPON: Unarmed
HEAD: Yellow Racecar Helmet
TORSO: Camouflage Kimono
PANTS: [Camouflage Kimono]
SHOES: [Camouflage Kimono]
MISC ONE: None
MISC TWO: Mew Shoes
MISC THREE: Carrot Medallion
RESULTING STATUS:
STATS:
50% sun resistance.
150% freezing resistance.
100% blinding resistance.
100% electrical stunning resistance.
150% Ice resistant.
100% Silencing resistant.
100% cat damage resistant.
When unarmed, evade is vastly improved.
= = ►[Bag of Holding] - The best piece of equipment…! It's good, dude! Infinite enough inventory space!
==o==
= ►WEAPONS:
Fallen Comrade - Great hanger made of three smaller ones. Sharper Than Darkness is at the front edge of it with the sickle facing out, and Swordbreaker is along the broad front edge to engage blades. Hard Winter makes up the backbone of the thing and the hilt so that it's actually wieldy! Dark, ice, earth elemental weapon.
STATS:
Slightly debuffs target's physical attack on impact.
50% darkness resistance when wielded.
Attacks are darkness elemental.
Sickle end may make opponents bleed.
SKILLS:
Revenge - Skill that increases in strength when health is lower. Power doubles for each deceased party member. Power is increased by fifty percent for each defeated party member. Fairies count as defeated rather than deceased no matter what. Power and effects depend on current weapon. High accuracy.
Bloody Mess - User bleeds faster and longer. Oof!
Jack Hammer - Y'know, I have no idea if this still works with it as is…!
Generic Buff - Channeling mana into the hanger gives the user a marginal increase in physical stats. Moderate increase to physical defense and offense.
Pulse - Basic dark magic, which creates an influx of dark magic in an enemy's form and stresses their whole body. Reduces magic attack.
Gaia Seed - Basic earth magic which intensifies Earth's pull a little. May make targets slightly tired.
Gaia Bloom - Advanced earth magic, which intensifies Earth's pull, with multiple instances of hazy earth magic. Makes the target tired.
Tundra - Crate-sized spike of ice that erupts under people and throws them off balance. I suppose it'd hurt if you fell on it. Basic ice attack.
Ice Shard - Advanced ice magic. May freeze enemies. Creates ice magic in their body, before initializing fully by flash-freezing the air all around them.
Combo Plus - User artificially gets an extra hit. Can be canceled out of.
Combo Jump - User cancels out of combos easily.
Frost Trail - User leaves frost in their trail while jumping.
=o=
Lion's Lindworm - Hanger made of the good harp and a guitar hanger thing! It's pretty good, dude! It's- it's also windy, dude...
STATS:
Boosts the power of Wind skills.
SKILLS:
Gust - Basic wind magic. Pushes the feeble. Fee~ble…!
Fairy Dust - Weapon status effect replaced with fairy dust. Wind attacks with this weapon get fairy dust all over the enemy, reducing accuracy and senses.
Sick Ill Harp Cords - Get ready for my next great mixtape…!
Combo Plus - User artificially gets an extra hit. Can be canceled out of. Obtained with combo technology!
Aerial Plus - Forced aerial support! It's vaguely easier to hit aerial foes with it! Obtained with combo technology!
Combo Jump - Allows the user to transition to jumping while mid-attack.
Combo Air Slide - Allows the user to transition to air sliding while mid-attack.
Aero Finish - Combo finishers deal air-toss status, artificially blowing foes into the air. Works best on human-weight foes.
Auto-Sucker - When this weapon is equipped, Brad will always lash out with it immediately.
=o=
Red Scare - A red and crimson plant hanger comprised of purplish-red gems and crimson metals. Boosts the power of fire skills. Also's got the good NERF gun attached now!
STATS:
Danmaku confuses the target.
Danmaku degrades the target's luck.
Danmaku may berserk the target.
Ignites things with physical impacts.
May berserk targets on physical impact.
SKILLS:
Hellfire Plume - A jet of hellfire. Berserks the targets, and isn't put out as easily. Not quite a grease fire, but unless it's totally frozen into oblivion, it ain't goin' out! Obeys fire resistance like any fire, though.
Fume - Makes hot air fume from the earth below. Might sear the feeble.
Berserk - Non-damaging fire spell which berserks a target for awhile. Can be removed with water or ice stuff!
Danmaku Adaptability - Now that there's a NERF gun on it I can shoot the good danmaku dude.
=o=
Deep Blue - A blue and silver plant hanger comprised of mysterious fantastical metals. Boosts the power of water skills.
SKILLS:
Freakin' Leaks! - Can produce limitless fresh hanger water…!
Geyser - Basic water attack. Gush of water erupts from the earth and might fling the feeble…!
Valve - I can control the water flow with this!
=o=
Bee-Fitty-Fore-Bawmber - A mechanical plant hanger enchanted to make big booms on contact. Made of a lot of weird freakin' parts and stick bits and piston things. Has a NERF gun slapped onto it too!
STATS:
Danmaku explodes, dealing knockback and splash damage.
Accuracy falls moderately when used to fire danmaku.
SKILLS:
Boom - Hitting stuff makes booms!
Danmaku Adaptability - Can also shoot the good danmaku, dude.
=o=
Fragile Flower - A cute hanger with floral designs and light colors. Aesthetically pleasing!
SKILLS:
Enfeebled - Wielder has halved physical defense and offense.
Cleanse - Basic healing skill which cleanses one target of all debuffs or status problems.
=o=
Dream Hanger - Non-elemental hanger. Black and unassuming metal. Currently balanced, and easy for Brad to use. Has innate magical properties to it.
STATS:
Increases accuracy slightly. Somehow…? So said Genkan.
10% instant death resistance. Hoh…!
=o=
One Million Revenants - Great hanger. Sun, holy, electric weapon. Market Gardener acts as the hilt, followed by Flandre Scarlet's modified Million Bucks. On the tip 'a them, the purple hilty bit of the Headless Horseman's Hanger is there, and Youkai Inconveniencer is tied to it like a flail!
STATS:
Hanger is warm like the sun on contact. Glows in the dark…!
25% Dark resistance.
Boosts the power of sun skills.
Boosts the power of holy skills.
Lowers user's defense slightly.
Attacks are electric and holy elemental.
Farther two thirds of the weapon phase through matter. More reliable the more magic is in the weapon.
Attacks can become magical rather than physical, with more mana in the weapon.
Critical hits during blast jumps.
Youkai Inconveniencer (holy hanger tied to the main body) sometimes deals a second instance of physical holy damage per attack.
SKILLS:
Headless - Summons pumpkin-head danmaku from nowhere to assault targets. One spawns every combo-finisher!
Combo Plus - User gets one more melee attack!
Critical Plus - User gets critical attacks more often!
Magic Attack - Physical attacks phase through targets and do magical damage. Makes chaining together attacks way easier.
Magic Attack - Physical attacks are converted to magic attacks, and fluidly pass through objects.
Flash - Blinding magic. Works best on dark-elementals, but also works on youkai. Humans don't resist it, so it still works on them, with reduced efficiency.
Flashlight - It's a flashlight! Might blind dark youkai, I dunno…
Shine - Basic holy magic. Generates a holy orb in the target's body, randomly battering them with a raw holy gush.
Saturn - Electric holy magic. Creates an expanding shockwave of electricity and holy light in an enemy's form.
Panic Attack! - Run faster when health is lower!
Combo Jump - Allows the user to transition to jumping while mid-attack.
Aerial Plus - Forced aerial support! It's vaguely easier to hit aerial foes with it!
Air Slide Plus - Lets the user awkwardly air slide.
Glide - Replaces my double jump skill with gliding.
High Jump - Increased jump height while running.
=o=
Frost Broker - Hanger-fan hybrid which never melts. Based on that time Shimokoa freakin' gutted me!
STATS:
Deals chilling on impact.
Randomly freezes the user.
Boosts the power of ice skills.
SKILLS:
Freezing Impact - Spreads frost along anything it strikes.
Auto-Sucker - When this weapon is equipped, Brad will always lash out with it immediately.
=o=
London Operating Cross - A cross that lets me summon good 'ol London, yo. Non-elemental in nature. Not actually a plant hanger. London herself uses Fireball, Ice Shard and Thunderbolt, but can only use a few spells before runnin' outta mana. Also fires diamond-shaped patterns 'a yellow, diamond-shaped danmaku. Hoh! Costly-ish to use…!
=o=
Neon Sparkler - Metal junk from a DJ booth called the MixMaster GIGA! Non-elemental… plant… hanger? Has a bunch of rod-like parts, and boxy metal bits, and stuff!
STATS:
Boosts the power of non-elemental skills.
25% Seduction resistance.
May cast Velvet Sparkles on impact.
SKILLS:
Velvet Sparkles - Weapon lights up, and gets sparks everywhere! When the weapon's fizzling, it might jolt foes, or stun them…
=o=
Boötes Void - Amalgam of VCR parts and VCR tapes combined with odd, hard to hold plastic parts. Emanates a lucid feeling. Apology gift from Maribel.
STATS:
50% Electric resistance.
50% Dark resistance.
50% Space resistance.
Immunity to blindness and stunning.
Randomly casts Radial Shroud. Blindness resistance stops this! Can be turned on and off using the 'next track' button on the midsection.
SKILLS:
VCR Shot - Shoot VCR tapes at enemies. They record the element of the enemy they struck, and are able to be used as throwable weapons later. By default, they deal minor physical electric damage and may stun.
Magic Defense Drain - VCR shots and physical attacks drain magical defense.
Radial Shroud - Blinds everyone in a radius. Uh oh…!
Gravity - Spatial orb powered by dark magic which weighs heavily down on a foe. May make targets heavy.
Astrology - A beam of galactic energy, which grows in strength and power based on nebulous criteria. It's not bound to HP though!
Geometry - A buncha fookin' non-elemental shapes fly to attack your target! What the fuck! ...Hits three times!
Plasma Cage - Electric magic which encapsulates a foe in weak magic that has a really high chance of stunning foes. May also bind targets.
=o=
Aqueous Ageous - A holy, crystal-looking hanger that resembles an utmost pure topaz-stained gem. Resists being dual-wielded by hand, and is difficult to craft with.
STATS:
Legendary boost to accuracy.
Transforms to a form that best suits the user.
=o=
Yin-yang Flail - A yin-yang with lots of rope freakin' decoratin' it! Hmm...
NERF longsword - 'CAUTION: Do not jab at people or animals'… you know what that means! Maybe one day this will actually come in handy…
NERF longsword: the sequel - Now I can dual wield these useless, narratively non-existent armaments!
==o==
= ►ARMOR:
Camouflage Kimono - This kimono means business. Doesn't actually help him hide in the brush.
STATS:
150% ice resistance.
50% freeze resistance.
50% dark resistance.
-50% percent fire resistance.
-50% percent burning resistance.
=o=
Kaguya Houraisan Disguise - Pink dress with lots of white ribbons. I'm not sure what to say about this...
STATS:
75% time resistance.
=o=
Yellow Racecar Helmet -It's like a really knockoff space marine helmet! It feels like it's got good physical defense, too… at least for my head.
STATS:
50% sun resistance.
100% freezing resistance.
100% blinding resistance.
100% electrical stunning resistance.
=o=
Lunarian Prototype Space Suit - A suit meant for combat in deep space. So far, it's only got the whole 'exist in deep space' part down…! Has an oxygen tank, but that's only useful if you wear the helmet to go along with it.
STATS:
100% electricity resistant.
100% freezing resistant.
Randomly casts Zero Gravity when it feels like it.
Zero Gravity - Area of effect spell which removes gravity from debris and the feeble!
=o=
Lunarian Prototype Deep Space Helmet - It's a freakin' space helmet.
STATS: (alone)
Fifty percent blinding resistant.
STATS: (paired with Lunarian Prototype Space Suit)
100% electricity resistant. Again, yo!
100% resistance to burning and being actively poisoned.
=o=
Testing Oxygen Tank - The oxygen tank used by the Lunarian Prototype Space Suit. Lasts for two and a half minutes. Not meant to actually be used outside of testing, but it's possible. Refills automatically in breathable air.
=o=
MP Prize Pin - A badge that allows the user to drain some of the enemy's mana, forcing it to become mana prizes on the field.
STATS:
Extends prize grabbing range. Yay…?
=o=
Sun Badge - A badge that looks like the sun. How interesting, dude.
STATS:
15% sun resistant. I need to smelt this into a weapon…!
50% resistance to blinding and electrical stunning.
Replaces the on-impact effect of all weapons with Sunfire Flare. Yuck…!
SKILLS:
Sunfire Flare - Flash of light that blinds everyone. Doesn't work on the sun-resistant.
=o=
Stock Outfit - Blue, long-sleeved shirt with a huge V-neck button-up collar. Blue sweatpants. Most balanced outfit.
STATS:
-5% wind resistance.
May make the wearer tired.
=o=
Retro Patchy Hat - A really old hat of Patchy's. It's freakin floofy, du~de…!
STATS:
Moderate increase to magical defense and offense.
=o=
Moon Crescent - Patchy's favorite accessory.
STATS:
Immunity to silencing.
25% moon resistance.
Moderate increase to magical offense.
=o=
Anti-Magic Amulet - Deep blue, crystalline necklace given by Patchy in exchange for a blue dragon's bone. I should incorporate this into an outfit too so I don't freakin' forget it, 'cause it's real important!
STATS:
Sharply increases magical defense.
=o=
Cow Costume - Female clothing, of some description…? I think! S'freakin' weird, dude!
STATS:
Increases breast size by 25%.
Increases max health by 50%.
Wearer is immune to dispelling.
=o=
Autumn Dress - An actually sensible dress…! Looks like generic villager garb, except prettier and with brighter colors. Even aged, it's still bright!
STATS:
Wearer is immune to tiredness.
Wearer is immune to holy weakness.
Wearer is immune to stunning.
=o=
Iron Cross - Big World War II medal! Freakin'- holy shit…
STATS:
Randomly summons explosion backup.
50% bomb resistance.
Stagger immunity.
=o=
Officer Hat - Nazi officer hat…! I better not get a million angry letters for finding this!
STATS:
50% darkness resistance.
Wearer is immune to instant death.
=o=
Officer's Coat - Nazi officer coat, too! Oh boy oh boy…
STATS:
50% darkness resistance.
Wearer is immune to being cursed.
Slightly boosts defense and magic defense.
=o=
Toyosatomimi's Regalia - Dress of the Crown Prince... of all Taoism or something, I don't freakin' know!
STATS:
100% Dispel resistant.
100% Blinding resistant.
50% Sun resistant.
Gives the user Bravery, improving critical rate by 50%, and reducing enemy critical rates by 30% while active.
Vaguely boosts defense.
=o=
Toyosatomimi's Earmuffs - Makes it hard to hear when worn right. Has an awesome symbol on the sides! I... have no freakin' clue what it means.
STATS:
100% Silencing resistant.
Immunity to all sound damage, including Mandragora-tier screeching when worn properly.
=o=
Toyosatomimi's Cape - Miko's fancy ass cape. It shimmers in the light!
SKILLS:
May be set to three different colors, changing cape properties:
Purple Mode:
The Prince's Will - Passive which constantly gives the user Morale status, preventing them from dying when struck by a blow that would fell them in one hit if they're of high vitality. Stops even Instant Death, although the wearer will be left on the cusp of death.
Red Mode:
Adaptive Combo Plus - Passively extends melee combo length on the ground and in the air by one.
Strength Up - Boosts strength somewhat.
The Prince's Strength - Boosts defense greatly.
Blue Mode:
Danmaku Plus - Each bullet fired has a 50% chance to be two bullets instead.
Magic Hastera - Mana regenerates 50% faster.
The Prince's Cunning - Boosts magic defense greatly.
=o=
Toyosatomimi's Panties - The prince's panties. They're purple and shiny...
STATS:
Improves movement speed slightly.
50% Dispel resistance.
Randomly grants Morale status.
100% Blinding resistance.
=o=
Carrot Medallion - Noob rabbit training tool, offered by Tewi to help me suck less at life!
SKILLS:
Essence of Pacifist * Unarmed - When unarmed, Brad gets an automatic evasion boost. +70% Evasion, but does not stack with magical buffs, and gets worse if he improves his speed naturally. Only works when unarmed.
=o=
Theimer M01 - Improved anti-tank RPG with armor-piercing capabilities. Huge weapon that must be slung over the shoulder. Known among lunar soldiers as "The Tamer". Only usable amongst the party by Genkan.
STATS:
200% damage bonus against armored vehicles.
-50% damage bonus against people.
High chance to fracture bones and cause fatal bleeding in opponents.
Very long reload time. Has limited ammo.
Hilariously bad accuracy.
SKILLS:
Theimer Lance - Large metal warhead that gores into people and armor alike. Travels slowly, and does physical damage. Next to no splash radius; the rocket more falling apart than actually exploding.
=o=
Eientei Gamer Pro RX3 Laptop - One of Kaguya's clean spare laptops, with a free BunnySoft Suite subscription. Respectably powerful hardware.
Generator Router Modem - Staggeringly convenient Eientei technology, which sustains a minor power supply autonomously from ambient mana. Doesn't work outside of Gensokyo. Provides access to Eientei's internet connection, for use by modern devices.
Black Carrying Case - Soft case with foam-insulated inside to protect technology in transit. Could also be used for field trips, or adventures. Not that it's very relevant, with a hammerspace bag on hand…
Nintendo DS XL Charger - A charger which works on all big DS models.
(x3) Themier Lance - Metal lances constructed for the Themier brand of lance launchers. Inside, they have a payload that pounds the metal architecture of the projectile into a target, rending flesh, armor, and stone. Might go off if you drop them.
Reimu's Outfit - Shrine maiden clothes, dude. Holy resistant, but I dunno how much! Even comes with the bindings and tubes and ribbon 'n' everything!
Reimu's Ribbon - Man, that's cuddly looking. I need to hug Reimu now, dude...
Hakurei Arm Sleeves - No- teach me, how do you wear these!?
Remilia Scarlet's Mob Cap - Twenty five percent dark resistance. Legends say that if touhous do not wear this hat, they die dude.
Monk Robes - Doesn't really stack up to my other shit at this point! Wonder what I can do wit' it...
Gravity Boots - Boots that reduce the user's gravity! More like, propels them off the floor a little. Reduces the effectiveness of space statuses on the user. Really weird to control…!
Ed Edd n Eddy Sound Badge - A badge that replaces nearby noises with stupid cartoon ones when worn! I- I got it a few chapters ago, but just now added it to the inventory…!
==o==
= ►CONSUMABLES/OTHER:
Fifty two thousand, seven hundred Yen - Cash just got a lot smaller...
Four Health Potions - They give you youkai-like regen for like, thirty seconds! No chuggin' these babies to indefinitely survive the cold reaches of outer space. Unless the regen outdoes the asphyxiation, but I think I'd rather die by that point…
Mega Potion - Youkai-like regen for thirty seconds… except for the whole family! Applies to entire party. Good for when we all suck at life!
Four Mana Potions - Restores an average amount of mana, I think. More than enough for someone like me!
Three Panaceas - Cures all status effects. I dunno if it works on debuffs, though...
Akihito's Broadsword - Too big for me to use as a weapon. I wonder if I could use it as like, a tent stake or something.
Butterfly Dream Pills - Makes you dream of being a beautiful butterfly!... now, if only there was a pill for lucid or wet dreams, and then I'd consider Yagokoro the doctor to end all doctors!
Rope of Red Bikinis - Wahaha! Gonna getcha, son!
Some Fancy Key - A key lent to me by Brittany. Wha- why. What's it for…!?
Youkai Exterminator Badge - I still have this, dude! Yo ho ho! Allows me to not be considered a youkai by most guardsmen!
Yellow Star Gem - A star-shaped yellow gem. I really should've asked Patchy what this did…! It's shiny and luminescent, though.
Sweet Sleep Pillow - Doremy's nice cuddly pillow. Really soft. Random chance to survey you on pillow quality while you're sleeping.
Genkan's Sweet Sleep Pillow - It's also pretty poofy...
Another 3DS - Especially 'cause I picked up anotha'!
Picture of Sendai Hakurei no Miko Sleeping on her Side and Facing the Viewer while Drowsy - ...Yeah uh, what it says on the tin. Reimu must see this, dude…!
Masturbation Pillow - ...Genkan probably would've given me a look fer this, if she could! Wau…
Dark Knife - Where the hell'd this- oh, wait! This is the thing Genkan got from that fairy! She just slipped it in here while no one was lookin'...
Empty Combo Technology - Red, orange and yellow piece of plastic and metal, about the size of a plant hanger. Adding its magic to Lion's Lindworm gave it Combo Plus and Aerial Plus! Now that it's empty, it's just plastic metal stuffs...
Wasp Stinger - Let the crap pile o~n!
==o==
= ►RANDOM CRAP:
Tables and Furniture - Impromptu furnishings!
==o►o==
PARTY MEMBERS:
==o►o==
Genkan, the Yuki-onna - A bitter yuki-onna from Gensokyo's wildlands, mostly active in the winter, and on particularly cold days. Heals from ice damage. Commands powerful control over frost, and has a wide variety of ice-affinity attacks. Weak to fire and burning. Cuddly, dude...
SKILLS:
Ice Control - Freely use ice to make stuff. Inherent one hundred percent ice resistance. Negative one hundred fire and burning resistance.
Freeze - Instantly freezes one to two enemies. Low chance of working on stronger foes.
Creaking Freeze - Generates a spinning, magic snowflake in an enemy's body, which instantly freezes them after a moment. High accuracy.
Tundra - Precursor to Glacier. Weak spike of ice that serves more as a warning. Physical ice attack.
Glacier - Erects a massive blade of ice from the ground, dealing incredible physical ice damage.
Triple Glacier - Same as above, except with more sudden scope across more targets. Less accurate. More costly.
Ice Spin - Creates a ring of initializing frost around a wide area, with a high chance to freeze.
Ice Shard - Advanced ice magic. May freeze enemies. Creates ice magic in their body, and freezes the air around them.
Snow - Make it snow locally. Very minor ambient ice damage to everyone on the battlefield, including allies. Has a low chance to instantly freeze someone for no reason.
Yuki-onna's Embrace - Hug. Binds target close to her. Makes the target tired, severely lowers accuracy and magical defense, and makes them comfortable. Skill may only be performed by my kind. Negative facets reduced by ice and freezing resist. Someone with over a hundred resistance will be buffed and healed by it.
Yuki-onna's Entombment - Final, optional stage of the hug. Guaranteed instant death inflicted by the draining of vitality. Heals the user for the heat taken from the target. Does not work well on bosses or the instant death resistant. Instant death proc is nullified if the target's ice or freezing resistance is over fifty percent. Skill may only be performed by my kind.
Breaker-onna Combo - A playful, goofy style of combat realized while dancing with Iku. Specializes in dealing with many close-up enemies, breaking grapples, and annihilating one's defenses, especially those of other youkai or yuki-onna.
Freeze Pose - Every combo finisher may transition into another combo finisher, as long as the user's body permits it. Genkan may also freeze herself during a Freeze Pose for additional versatility and defense, as well as healing, at the cost of speed.
Last Stand - Quick combo finisher where Genkan flails her arm into an enemy one to four times. Cures Genkan's dizziness and confusion.
The Breaker - Quick unarmed combo finisher, where Genkan rolls onto her back, handstands, and kicks a leg out. May launch foes. Breaks enemy guarding postures. Cures Genkan's dizziness and confusion.
Handstand Spin - Unarmed combo finisher, where Genkan spins while handstanding, assaulting opponents with her legs as they spin around up high. May break guarding postures.
Thigh Pendulum Sweep * Circular Revolution - Unwieldy combo finisher that takes a lot of setup to pull off. Sweeping her legs around, while barely standing with her arms, Genkan wreaks hell on an opponent's balance and guard.
Ice Shaver - Genkan chills the whole battlefield by spinning atop one of her glacier blades, getting ice and frosty mist everywhere. Chills everybody.
Rising Rotor - When Genkan's knocked down, she may spin around on her shoulders with her legs extended to try and launch or knock over nearby enemies. Defensive recovery option.
Joy Aura - If Genkan really has fun with it, her mana flares pink or amethyst, increasing speed and physical abilities until the battle's over.
= = ► EQUIPPED ITEMS - GENKAN:
WEAPON: Fans
HEAD: None
TORSO: Cow Outfit
PANTS: [Cow Outfit]
SHOES: Plain Sandals
MISC ONE: Yasaka's Black Panties
MISC TWO: None
MISC THREE: None
RESULTING STATUS:
200% ice resistance [200% native]
200% freezing resistance [200% native]
Immune to Dispel.
+20% max HP.
+20% breast size.
Elemental effect of weapons is replaced with Dispel. [Yasaka's Black Panties]
-50% fire resistance [native]
-50% burning resistance [native]
==o==
Absolute Zero Kimono - A better version of the stock yuki-onna kimono. Outfited with new royal blue and cyan trims. It's fun, dude...
STATS:
100% percent ice resistance.
Effects vary when not worn by her…!
=o=
Heavy Tanker - Huge, metal-grey cardboard fans!
STATS:
+150% max HP.
Quadrupled defense.
Speed reduced to 25%.
Knockback effects halved.
100% Stagger immune.
50% Bomb resistance.
SKILLS:
Super Armor - When casting or melee attacking, user is way more knockback resistant.
Tundral Disaster - User can create a pinnacle glacier of ice, and then detonate it like a warhead. Half magical bomb, half physical ice attack.
Defender - Defense is increased in critical situations. Passive.
=o=
Fever - The tiniest pink fans...!
STATS:
100% Confusion resistant.
100% Slow resistant.
100% immunity to evasion debuffs.
Defense halved.
Attack halved.
Speed doubled.
SKILLS:
Break Time - Take a break. You've earned it, dude! Heals all MP and HP, if user is given some time to relax. User has to do three party tricks to get the HP and MP.
Hastega - Speed up the whole party! Doubles everyone's speed. Stacks...!
Rising Rotor - Do a breakdance move to fend off attackers and get back up!
=o=
Love of the Lindens - Pink, azure fan set which emanates a windy aura. They're traditional dance fans, too, fit with patterns of a specific type of tree.
STATS:
25% Wind resistance
25% Earth resistance
SKILLS:
Freeze Pose - Allows the user to freeze amidst a dance-style skill, and seamlessly combo into another.
Sunrise - Flourishing motion, filled with repeated three-sixty spins which roar into an enemy, staggering them repeatedly. Wind elemental physical skill.
BreezeFazer - Heavy physical skill, where the user coasts the wind to skate into their target, clotheslining them with a limb. User must be able to fly to use this.
=o=
Two thousand yen - Pocket money.
Bagged Money - We still dunno how much Reimu gave us...
Peppermint - Yo- Genkan has candy…!?
Fans - Regular fans. Helps her spread out frigid air, but she mostly holds onto them for personal fashion, apparently...
Ninjas of Love - Novel? Yo- what...
Viking Rune - Reusable rune that summons a viking monolith. Once summoned, it greatly increases everyone's physical attack prowess, before firing a frost spark with massive freezing capabilities. Very costly to all party members. Uses two inventory slots.
3DS - Genkan likes to play the single video game, dude…
[no space remaining]
==o►o==
Maria, the Actually Ordinary Magician - A villager from the human village. Sort of down on herself, and not very confident… but when she gains steam, she can be very determined. Resistances and weaknesses depend on equipment. Can cast basic elemental spells.
SKILLS:
Fire - Small, homing fireball of doom. May ignite foes! Doesn't do much damage.
Fira - Slightly larger homing fireball of doom. May ignite foes. Bursts broader than the preceding spell.
Blizzard - Spread shot of big snowflakes. May chill foes.
Blizzara - Big spread shot of myriad ice chunks, with magical snowflakes whirling around inside them. May freeze foes.
Thunder - Random spread of bolts in an area. Basic electric spell.
Thundara - Random spread of bolts in an area which explode on impact with the ground. May stun foes.
Charm - Boosts magical attack of self or an ally moderately.
Seduction - Skill that temporarily seduces a foe. Single target, and doesn't work well on bigger girls...
INVENTORY:
WEAPON: An Eternity Together
HEAD: Zephyr Bombshells
TORSO: Casual Freeze Clothes
PANTS: [Casual Freeze Clothes]
SHOES: Casual Shoes
MISC ONE: None
MISC TWO: None
MISC THREE: None
RESULTING STATUS:
50% ice resistance
100% freezing resistance
25% bomb resistance
Slightly improved magical defense [native]
Befriending bomb fairies is easier
Randomly summons kamikaze fluffles
==o==
Pine Frost Staff - Made with pine wood and an icy reagent.
STATS:
25% ice resistance.
100% freezing resistance.
-50% burning resistance.
SKILLS:
Ice Shard - Advanced ice magic. May freeze enemies. Creates ice magic in their body, and freezes the air around them.
=o=
Way of the Tiger - A really good wood staff, dude!
STATS:
-75% max MP.
+75% max HP.
Weapon is very light!
Defense increased sharply!
Attack increased sharply!
Magical defense decreased sharply...
Magical attack decreased sharply...
SKILLS:
Staff Skill - Doing effective moves with the staff is a lot easier because of its combat design!
High Jump - User can jump a bit better!
Polearm Beatdown - Critical attack that users tend to pull off once their adrenaline is running high. Hits multiple times.
=o=
An Eternity Together - Grey staff, with a very, very intricate top piece.
STATS:
50% Time resistant.
User is immune to slowing and stop.
+15% max MP for every party member.
User's speed is halved for every additional party member.
SKILLS:
Stop - Freezes an enemy in time. Only works on weaker foes. Any damage the enemy takes while frozen is relayed to it on fast-forward once it's free again!
=o=
Stubby Rapier - A shiny, brass rapier. Imbued with magical energy, for spell swords.
STATS:
50% dispel resistance.
=o=
Casual Freeze Clothes - Casual, neon villager garb. Bright yellow shirt with a blue snowflake stitched onto the front, a bright blue skirt, and a tan vest.
STATS:
50% ice resistant.
100% freezing resistant.
=o=
Wood Staff - Training foci for magic. Not very good for much else.
Magical Lens - When coupled with magic, this lens shoots non-elemental lasers. Gift from Marcus Kirisame.
Travel Bag - Item that grants inventory by holding more items. Wahaha! Eight slots.
Two Mana Potions - Alchemical blends which restore magic energy.
Sabbath Pamphlet - Dark brochure imbued with instructional magic, and desires from a land far, far away. Teaches Seduction to mages.
=o=
Lance Construction Brochure - Mass-produced lunar-grade instructions on how to cheaply and quickly construct lances of many materials on the battlefront.
SKILLS:
Construct Lance - Combine technical know-how with magic to create more lances. They serve as ammunition for Theimer, Lancaar, Yatsu-VB PL, Pzf. 98 Lanze, or Ultimortar anti-tank lance launchers.
=o=
[LunarStorage: Recreational Model] - Allows extended inventory. Has an undefined capacity, but can't fit objects beyond a certain size. Allows Maria to draw any item at any time easily, as well as put them away. Exists as a square, red box of a backpack.
=o=
SafetyZap! OVERKILL Edition - Half baton, half knife taser. When the grip is, well, gripped, the edges of it energize with one million volts of electric energy. Very efficient self-defense tool which has an amazingly high chance to stun foes.
STATS:
When the skill is active, deals magic, electric damage. Stuns foes.
SKILLS:
Taser - When the handle is gripped, the thunderstorm begins.
=o=
Zephyr Bombshells - Premium, bomb-elemental fashion accessories which attach above the ears, making the user look like they're some kinda android from really old nineties animes.
STATS:
25% Bomb resistance.
Randomly summons kamikaze fluffles.
Makes befriending bomb-elemental fairies easier.
=o=
[eighty six spaces remaining]
==o==
Hana, the Electric Fairy Maid - Snuggly fairy maid companion…! Healed by electric magic. Immune to electric stunning, 'cause yeah. Weak to earth, poison and darkness. Quick to become ill from poison.
SKILLS:
Little Zap - Basic electric magic. Zaps a target twice with static from above.
Random Electric - When pressured, uses random electric spells.
Electric Control - With true power, she's able to stun opponents into submission by touching them.
Electric Elemental - 300% electric resistant. 100% percent resistance to electrical stunning!
INVENTORY:
Hana's Fairy Maid Uniform - Stock standard uniform from the mansion! Cyan-tinted in places to match her hair color. Hoh...
==o==
Seikatsu Kikai, the Human Salvation Robot - She no longer T-poses! Now, she just-... uses stock animations! Yes, dude!
SKILLS:
Medibeam - A slow-healing beam, which takes a couple minutes to rejuvenate someone. Feels good to be targeted by…
Cloaking - Seikatsu becomes invisible.
Scan - Returns data on a foe, including name, biological info, stats and strategies. All of us can call on this skill.
INVENTORY:
Nothing.
WEAPON: Seikatsu Kikai Offense System V.3.63
BODY: Regenerative Skin Armor Augmentation with Limb Enhancement V.3.35.86
MISC ONE: SLUT T-Shirt.
MISC TWO: None.
MISC THREE: None.
STATUS:
Robot physiology (immunity to poisons, psychological effects and bodily damage)
Tough to fight (immunity to freezing, stunning, silence, syphon, and instant death)
Immune to stagger, blinding, tired, among others.
-80% radiation resistant
-50% thunder resistant
-80% bomb resistant
-50% water resistant
200% holy resistant
-50% dark resistant
80% earth resistant
-80% magnet resistant
-30% wind resistant
80% fire resistant
80% ice resistant
100% poison resistant
100% moon resistant
==o==
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
INTERESTING WAY TO END THE BATCH
this was a way different direction than i'd originally considered this late in the chapter
a lot of it came from some circumstantial suggestions i'd accepted that slowed the pace due to the walk down the mountain and sanae joining the party - w -
and that's when i was like "awh MERRY" and the rest was history…!
i'm interested to get impressions of what's goin' on in here, but after a focused proofing myself and a little editing, it felt like a good lesson in anger - w -
this author's note is being written pretty much like the day of releasing this batch, quite awhile after i wrote the chapter, but hoh yo
i feel like this played out really well and opens the door for really interesting interactions down the road, and gives brad a chance to talk with his party more indepth about this
there's a LOTTA LOOSE THREADS THAT CAN BE PULLED, all stemming from this moment, and i'm really excited to tug on 'em soon!
also don't worry i don't think i'll be revising half of sendai for two months again, for the most part things will return to regularly scheduled programming, unless i wanna revise more FG chapters, but we'll see
insert obligatory "i think sendai has really cool concepts and moments and pls read" discussion here
by the way we have a discord link in my profile! if, somehow, you've missed this fact over every other batch…!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
"Wait." I turn to Maria, while we sit at the table after my event. "...Your Zephyr Bombshells equip doesn't proc like, ever…!" Bootie Void remind me of this, for some reason!
"...Wh-" Maria's taken off-guard, at first. "...They did something?"
shoof. The door to the Hakurei Shrine slid open, and a person-sized fluffle shuffles in. It has no legs, and no fins. Instead, it has two bombs for arms!
"...Um." Sanae smiled awkwardly. "...I- I'm gonna go ahead and say you guys got lucky."
fsst. The fluffle smiles big, as it quickly shuffles closer to the table! The fuses on the bombs accelerate into nothing…!
"Aa-" Genkan looks worried! "Um-"
"Look out!" Maria ducks under the table- oh shit-
Sanae throws an ofuda! "Wha- hold on-"
boom!
==== FREAKIN GENSOKYO ====
as always, see you all next time!
