I do not own any of the internet personalities or memes presented in this story.

The Internet Police: Year in Review

The War of European Succession, Part 3

There were several times that the eternal city of Rome was conquered. For a city that conquered much of the civilized world, Rome was also prone to being taken over itself. There were two specific takeovers of Rome that merit much interest. The first being the sack of Rome by Alaric and his Visigoth army in 410 A.D. Though Rome was no longer the capital of the western Roman Empire by that time, the city retained its prestige as the original capital, and when Rome was pillaged for the first time in 800 years, the psychological effect was catastrophic for many contemporaries. It must have been horrifying to be alive upon realizing that the city that once ruled the entire Mediterranean was now the playground of barbarians. Centuries later, Rome was the capital of Fascist Italy, and under the leadership of Dictator Benito Mussolini, Italy tried to reconstruct the boundaries of the once glorious Roman Empire, going so far as to launch invasions of Greece and Egypt with assistance from Nazi Germany. Eventually, Mussolini's incompetence resulted in the fall of Rome by the Allied forces on June 4th, 1944, but unlike the Sack of Rome of 410, the local Romans greeted the Allied forces led by American General Mark Clark. In an event known as the Liberation of Rome, the Romans were grateful to an invading force, and thankfully, the city was taken without much resistance or bloodshed. One would think a World War II event called the Liberation of Rome would be remembered. It would have been a momentous occasion if the far more famous D-Day Landings at Normandy had not taken place two days later. The Normandy Landings would be embedded in the public consciousness rather than the Liberation of Rome. Fast forwarding out of the 20th century, Rome was embroiled in yet another invasion as part of the Italian campaign of a war known as the War of European Succession. It was a war fought between the Innovation Alliance led by Supreme Commander HurricaneAubrey and the Sylvanians commanded by Roxy Harmon. The War of European Succession's Battle of Rome shared similarities between the Sack of Rome by Alaric and the Liberation of Rome by General Mark Clark. Like the Liberation of Rome, the Romans were grateful for an invading force coming to liberate them from their occupiers. Unfortunately for Innovation Alliance soldiers like HurricaneAubrey and the Angry Video Game Nerd, the actual battle inside Rome was more like the Sack of Rome as the Sylvanians decided to put up a massive resistance against the invaders. As HurricaneAubrey was driving a blue hoodless Ferrari through Rome's Villa Borghese Gardens, the Nerd was in the back-passenger seat loading up his machine gun and firing upon the green cars being driven by Green Army soldiers.

"Can you drive a little faster?!" shouted the Nerd as he shot out the tires from underneath one car.

"I don't want us to crash into anything," answered HurricaneAubrey.

"Such an astute observation," said the Nerd sarcastically as he fired rounds of bullets into the green cars' front engines. "Well, I can't hold off these fucking Sylvanians if we're going so slow."

Looking through a cracked car mirror on the driver's side, HurricaneAubrey saw three green cars charging towards the blue Ferrari. Understanding the urgency of the situation, HurricaneAubrey accelerated the car. Feeling a bit daring, HurricaneAubrey guided the cars through the trees of the Villa Borghese Gardens. This strategy paid off as two of the cars abandoned their pursuit of the blue Ferrari. The third car decided to throw all caution to the wind and chase after the blue Ferrari between the cypress trees.

"Watch out for that tree!" shouted the Nerd as he saw the front passenger mirror getting torn off by a nearby tree.

"Which one?!" screamed HurricaneAubrey as she was driving furiously between the cypress trees.

Just then, the Nerd heard something metallic land into the Ferrari. It was a grenade.

"Oh fuck!" yelled the Nerd as he picked up the grenade and threw it into the air.

The grenade exploded mid-air between the blue Ferrari and the green car. The smoke from the detonated grenade blinded the green car. Amongst the smoke, the Nerd saw that the green car had crashed into a cypress tree, the result of the car's driver being blinded by the smoke.

"Nice," said HurricaneAubrey as she drove the blue Ferrari out of the Villa Borghese Gardens and onto the mean streets of Rome.

"They're back," said the Nerd as he saw the two green cars that had pursued them earlier were now reassuming their chase.

"Get down!" shouted HurricaneAubrey, with the Nerd obeying her command.

A hail of bullets came from the machine guns being fired from the two green cars. The Nerd decided to retaliate back by aiming a rocket launcher at the two green cars. He fired the rocket, and it promptly missed the two green cars as the rocket itself exploded in the middle of the street.

"No more rockets!" shouted the Nerd as he made a futile effort searching for any spare rockets on the Ferrari's floor.

"Let's take these two green cars on a proper Roman holiday," said HurricaneAubrey as she drove the Ferrari to where Romans liked to hang out.

The blue Ferrari reached the tops of the Spanish Steps. The Nerd looked below at the bottom of the steps. Giving his nod of approval, HurricaneAubrey drove the Ferrari down the Spanish Steps.

"Do you see the two green cars?" asked HurricaneAubrey as the Ferrari continued its slow descent.

The Nerd looked backwards, and he saw the two green cars, with its occupants armed with machine guns.

"Yep," said the Nerd simply.

"Hang on!" shouted HurricaneAubrey as the Ferrari reached the last step of the Spanish Steps.

The inhabitants of the two green cars saw the Ferrari speeding away. The two green cars drove at maximum speed down the Spanish Steps. One car was lucky. The other was not. Leaving behind the green car that had a busted bottom from its failed attempt at an aerial jump, the functional green car hunted down the Ferrari.

"These Sylvanians aren't going to just surrender," said the Nerd as he saw the green car speeding towards the two agents.

"They have a cause worth fighting for," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Something I don't want a part of," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey was in deep thought about what cause the Sylvanians were fighting for.

"What were they fighting for anyway?" thought HurricaneAubrey as she was losing focus on commandeering the Ferrari. "Was it for environmental reasons and a genuine concern for the planet's welfare? Or are the Sylvanians like Roxy in that they only became extreme environmentalists for their own self-interests? What about the Critic's reasons for turning to Roxy? What possible reason does he have to turn to the dark side?

"Watch out for that fountain!" shouted the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey looked directly ahead. She saw the Trevi Fountain.

"No!" shouted HurricaneAubrey as she slammed the brakes.

Fortunately, the Ferrari was driven directly over a ramp placed on the edge of the Trevi Fountain's barrier. This resulted in the Ferrari landing into the Trevi Fountain's pool of water. Unfortunately, the two agents were stuck inside an inoperable Ferrari as the green car pulled up beside the Trevi Fountain's barrier. The Sylvanians got out of their car.

"Ready boys?!" shouted one of the Sylvanians.

Holding their hands up in surrender, the two agents saw machine guns being lifted, aimed directly at the two occupants of the partly submerged Ferrari.

"Duck!" shouted HurricaneAubrey.

The two agents ducked into the parts of the Ferrari not flowing with water. Bullets came flying above and besides the two agents. The Nerd and HurricaneAubrey heard the engine of another car in the middle of bullet sounds.

"What the?" shouted one of the Sylvanians.

More bullets were heard. The sounds of gasps and thuds filled the air. And then there was silence. HurricaneAubrey and the Nerd were afraid of moving lest there were more surprises awaiting them.

"Get in," said a familiar voice.

The Nerd was smiling while HurricaneAubrey was grimacing. The two agents got up and saw that it was Jennxpenn who had rescued them. Wading through the Trevi Fountain's pool of water and walking past the Sylvanians shot by Jennxpenn, the two agents saw Jennxpenn herself inside of an unhooded yellow Lamborghini.

"I said get in," said Jennxpenn with displeasure as she stared at HurricaneAubrey.

The two agents joined their companion inside of the yellow Lamborghini. Jennxpenn drove the Lamborghini away from the Trevi Fountain. HurricaneAubrey gave one last look at the fountain.

"It has been said that good luck comes to anyone who tosses a coin into the Trevi Fountain," thought HurricaneAubrey as she loaded up her machine gun. "But I drove a Ferrari into the Trevi Fountain. Surely I'll have really good luck in Rome."

On the one hand, HurricaneAubrey did have good luck when she survived her encounter with the Sylvanians at the Trevi Fountain. On the other hand, it was Jennxpenn who saved her.

"It could have been anyone else besides her," thought HurricaneAubrey.

As Jennxpenn drove past several green cars filled with Sylvanians, the three agents refocused their attention on the greater battle inside Rome.

"Let's hope I'll have enough good luck to make it out alive," thought HurricaneAubrey as she fired her machine gun at the green cars.

At the ruins of the Circus Maximus, Internet Police agents Gigguk was driving a motorcycle, with TamashiiHiroka in the sidecar. They were being pursued by two motorcyclists wearing gas masks.

"We're going around in circles," said TamashiiHiroka as she fired her machine gun at the motorcyclists.

"No. We're going around in an oval," said Gigguk.

Gigguk revved up his motorcycle to drive right out of the Circus Maximus' ruins. The two Sylvanians on motorcycles followed.

"We're heading straight to the Roman Forum!" shouted Gigguk as he continued driving in a straight line.

"Why would you tell them that?!" shouted TamashiiHiroka as she reloaded her machine gun.

"To distract them," said Gigguk as he gestured towards the two Sylvanian motorcyclists.

TamashiiHiroka saw behind her the two motorcyclists. Though she could not see their faces, she saw that they appeared less tense in their body movements, as if they were confident of victory. Seizing this opportunity, TamashiiHiroka fired her machine gun towards the tires of the two motorcycles. One of the motorcycles was stopped in its tracks. The other continued its pursuit of the two Internet Police agents. Eventually, the two agents reached the ancient Roman Forum.

"Let's get off here," said Gigguk as he stopped the motorcycle at the entrance of the Roman Forum.

TamashiiHiroka obeyed Gigguk's command and followed him into the ruins of the great temples that once dominated the lives of ancient Romans. The Sylvanian motorcyclist remained on his motorized vehicle as he drove through the fallen columns in search of the two agents. Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka were crawling on their knees upon the marble fragments of the Roman Forum.

"Make some noise," said Gigguk.

"What?" whispered a confused TamashiiHiroka.

"It's what he would least expect," said Gigguk. "Do you trust me?"

"Not if we're being suicidal," said TamashiiHiroka.

"Trust me," said Gigguk. "I've got this."

TamashiiHiroka let out a sigh as she nodded her head.

"Hey! Hey you!" shouted Gigguk.

The Sylvanian motorcyclist quickly loaded his machine gun as he revved up his motorcycle.

"Hey! Hey you! Hey you Pikachu!" shouted TamashiiHiroka.

The Sylvanian drove his motorcycle to the source of the noise.

"Hey! Hey!" screamed the two agents as they ran across the Forum and out of sight of the motorcyclist.

The motorcyclist tried to see where the noise was coming from. Much to the motorcyclist's frustration, he was unable to pinpoint the exact focal point of this sound. Thus, he was wandering around without reason.

"I've got you!" shouted a voice behind the motorcyclist.

The Sylvanian motorcyclist looked behind himself. It was another Sylvanian wearing a gas mask.

"Don't scare me like that," said the Sylvanian motorcyclist.

"Now!" shouted another voice.

The two Sylvanians saw two people without gas masks leaping onto them. The two Sylvanians were punched into unconsciousness.

"Do you trust me now?" asked Gigguk.

"I trust you now," said TamashiiHiroka with a smile on her face.

A loud bang that sounded broken glass was emitted from a distance. A hissing noise soon followed.

"I'm going to have to ask you to trust me again," said Gigguk as he took one unconscious Sylvanian's gas mask, placing it over his face.

"Okay," said TamashiiHiroka as she followed Gigguk's lead and covered her face with a gas mask.

It appeared that glass containers holding poisonous gas was being catapulted into the Roman Forum. Luckily, the two agents were wearing gas masks. Gigguk motioned TamashiiHiroka to follow him back to their motorcycle with the sidecar.

"Not so fast," said a voice.

Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka looked behind them. It was her. It was Roxy Harmon wearing a military uniform and holding a gun filled with acid.

"Look out!" shouted Gigguk as he dragged TamashiiHiroka down onto the ground.

A hissing sound was heard in front of the two agents that was followed by a crash. Apparently, a Roman column that had stood for thousands of years was toppled in an instant by Roxy's acid gun.

"Go Go Go!" screamed Gigguk as he and TamashiiHiroka ran for their motorcycle.

While Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka were being chased by Roxy with her acid gun, the Nerd, HurricaneAubrey, and Jennxpenn had been fighting their way through crowds upon crowds of Sylvanians. They apparently lost track of time. Everything was a blur to them. It was not until Jennxpenn had driven her Lamborghini into an enormous film studio that the agents had regained some form of self-awareness.

"Where are we?" spoke HurricaneAubrey as she got out of the crashed Lamborghini.

"I thought you knew all the answers," said Jennxpenn in a disrespectful tone as she got out of the car, slamming the door after getting out.

"You drove us here. You should at least know where we are," said HurricaneAubrey.

"I was busy driving the fuck away from all those Sylvanians," snapped Jennxpenn. "What were you doing back there while I was driving? Gazing lovingly at those crumbling Roman statues that nobody cares about?"

"Those statues are masterpieces! And for your information, I was busy trying to save Rome from being decimated by the Sylvanians," said HurricaneAubrey.

HurricaneAubrey and Jennxpenn were arguing relentlessly with each other. The Nerd remained inside the crashed Lamborghini. From his point of view, it was amazing the two agents had time to argue with each other even with a war going on around them.

"It's even worse than when the Critic and I argued in our early days," thought the Nerd. "And that's saying something."

The Nerd got out of the car, and ignoring the insults being hurled between HurricaneAubrey and Jennxpenn, he decided to observe where he was. The Nerd saw studio lights and production cameras immersed within a thick tropical jungle.

"I bet you don't care about your little sister!" shouted Jennxpenn. "You only want to save her out of pride."

"How dare you?!" screamed HurricaneAubrey. "I genuinely love my sister. I do not have any ulterior motives. How dare you even insinuate that?!"

"Because you don't care about people. You only care about reputation," said Jennxpenn. "You care more about lasting fame than actual human life."

"Uh. I hate to break up this lovely discussion between you two, but I think we're inside a film studio right now," said the Nerd.

Jennxpenn and HurricaneAubrey stared at the Nerd.

"A film studio?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"Yes," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey rattled her brains, and then showed a horrified expression.

"I think you should wait by the car while the Nerd and I search the film studio," said HurricaneAubrey as she stared at Jennxpenn.

"Why?" questioned Jennxpenn.

"Because there are things that shouldn't be seen by you," said HurricaneAubrey.

"What?" asked Jennxpenn looking bewildered.

"What exactly?" questioned the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey approached the Nerd and whispered in his ear. The Nerd's eyes widened.

"I agree with HurricaneAubrey. Jennxpenn, you should wait by the car," said the Nerd.

"Oh, come on," said Jennxpenn. "I can handle it. I'm not some baby."

"Then explain why you were watching reruns of Elmo's World," said the Nerd.

"Never mind that, I can handle it. I just drove through a barrage of gunfire back there," said Jennxpenn.

"I am the Supreme Commander of the Innovation Alliance," said an annoyed HurricaneAubrey. "I order you to stay behind Jennxpenn."

"And what if I don't," said Jennxpenn as she crossed her arms with a stubborn look on her face.

Before HurricaneAubrey could respond, a motorcycle came bursting through a wall of the film studio. It was being ridden by Internet Police agents Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka.

"We lost her," said Gigguk as he got off the motorcycle. "You okay TamashiiHiroka?"

"I'm just fine," said TamashiiHiroka as she got out of the sidecar.

"Perfect timing," said HurricaneAubrey with a sense of relief on her face. "Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka. Escort Jennxpenn to the nearest clinic."

"I'm fine!" shouted Jennxpenn.

"Do as I say," insisted HurricaneAubrey to Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka. "I'm doing this for her own good. There are things she shouldn't see."

Though confused, Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka did as their Supreme Commander and grabbed Jennxpenn's arms.

"There should be a spare car nearby," said Gigguk as he did his best to restrain Jennxpenn.

"Let me go!" screamed Jennxpenn as she was trying to break free from Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka's grip. "I'm okay. I'm a big girl."

"Let's go save your little sister and everyone else imprisoned!" shouted the Nerd as he beckoned HurricaneAubrey to follow him into a hallway.

Much to HurricaneAubrey's displeasure, Jennxpenn heard what the Nerd said.

"Why don't you want me to help you save your little sister?! In fact, why didn't you tell me earlier she was here at this specific film studio?!" yelled Jennxpenn as HurricaneAubrey "Answer me!"

HurricaneAubrey ran after the Nerd into the hallway. She gave one last look at Jennxpenn as she was being dragged by Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka back onto the streets of Rome.

"You just want the glory of saving your little sister. If you saved her alone along with your pet dog, then she will forgive you for abandoning her during the Great Schism of America. That is why you do not want me to help you. You just want to save face after what you did to her during the Great Schism, HurricaneAubrey!" shouted Jennxpenn.

"Shut up!" shouted HurricaneAubrey as she gritted her teeth.

HurricaneAubrey and the Nerd made their way through the hallway. The screams of Jennxpenn were replaced with an eerie silence. The halls were dimly lit. The two agents opened the doors of the hallway, and what they saw disturbed them.

"No," said HurricaneAubrey softly as she glared into one room. "I was hoping that this was just a rumor."

HurricaneAubrey made a quick sign of the cross as she slowly closed the door in respect. The Nerd also displayed looks of disgust as he peered inside another room.

"That's just fucked up," commented the Nerd. "I don't see how the Critic can come back to our side after condoning what happened here."

"I don't see a way out for him either. But it cannot hurt to try," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Let's go get this bitch Roxy," said the Nerd as he polished his machine gun.

After going through several more rooms displaying evidence of Roxy's crimes against humanity (with one room being a replica of Prague Castle's dining hall), the Nerd and HurricaneAubrey found themselves inside what appeared to be a factory. It was not a modern factory that complied with safety regulations and had some semblance of wanting to limit pollution levels. It was a 19th century Industrial Age factory that had disregard for both the environment and human life. If it were not for the modern cameras that were manned by individuals wearing present-day clothes, the Nerd and HurricaneAubrey would have thought they had somehow traveled back into time where men and women were toiling away as they produce manufactured goods for their masters. A few of these men and women were dressed in fashionable Victorian attire, but most of them were wearing filthy clothes.

"Unbelievable," said the Nerd. "These Sylvanians are filming a movie in the middle of a battle."

Suddenly, the film crew noticed two unfamiliar, modern-looking individuals in the middle of the shoot, and seeing that they were armed with machine guns, they immediately fled in a panic.

"Come back here you cowards!" rang out a voice that the Nerd and HurricaneAubrey wished they never had heard at this very moment.

Though he was bald and had a chubbier appearance than before, the Nostalgia Critic was instantly recognizable to the two Internet Police agents. The Critic frowned for a moment as he gazed upon the two agents, but then he gave off a smile as if he were greeting two friends who he had not seen for years.

"Hi Angry Video Game Nerd. Hi HurricaneAubrey," said the Critic as he waved in a condescending tone. "How is your day?"

The two agents were flabbergasted at how the Critic was treating their presence without a care in the world.

"Get out of here, Roxy," said the Critic. "You're too important to stick around unlike those traitors."

"As you wish, my dear Nostalgia Critic," said Roxy in a loving tone.

Just as suddenly as she had appeared in their line of sight, Roxy had seemingly vanished in a blink of an eye. She had apparently slipped away through the rows and columns of machinery to an unknown escape route.

"Of course, I have no intention of escaping. I plan to finish you off once and for all here for the needs of the many," said the Critic.

The Critic pulled out a pistol and began firing. Everyone in the nearby vicinity ducked for cover. Luckily, nobody was struck by a bullet. After firing several rounds, the Critic ran towards what appeared to be a flight of metal stairs leading to a factory bridge that could see everything inside the industrial building.

"Get back here!" shouted the Nerd as he chased after the Critic.

HurricaneAubrey proceeded to check on the condition of the people who were forced by the Sylvanians to act within a hazardous film set. Sensing HurricaneAubrey's aura of protection, all the forced actors and actresses began congregating around her. HurricaneAubrey didn't know what to think of all these people looking to her as some sort of savior.

"I always thought you looked a little like Joan of Arc growing up with you. Never thought you would act like her too," said a familiar voice.

HurricaneAubrey then saw a figure emerging from the crowds of grateful people. It was Allison wearing a late 19th century Victorian dress. HurricaneAubrey rushed to embrace her little sister.

"I'm sorry," said HurricaneAubrey trying not to cry. "I'm so sorry."

"It's alright. You're here now. And that's all that matters," said Allison as she patted the back of HurricaneAubrey's head.

After what seemed to be an eternity, HurricaneAubrey and her sister stopped hugging each other and faced each other from a short distance. They both had weak smiles on their faces.

"Help your friends. Help them take down the Critic," insisted Allison as she nudged her head towards where the Critic had apparently run off to.

"What about you and the other innocent people here?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"Give me a gun," said Allison. "I'll take care of everyone here."

"Are you sure?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"After what we've been through, the Critic and his posse better not mess with me," said Allison with a determined look on her face.

HurricaneAubrey handed a pistol to Allison.

"Be careful," added HurricaneAubrey.

"Will do. Now go," said Allison.

HurricaneAubrey rushed to where the Nerd and the Critic had traveled. Eventually, she found the Nerd staring at the Critic, with the latter on a steel walkway that oversaw the entire factory. HurricaneAubrey looked upon the face of the man she had spent years building up a relationship with after a tumultuous start. But all those years of progress were now in jeopardy as she asked for an explanation for the situation they were in now.

"Explain yourself," HurricaneAubrey asked calmly. "What convinced you to approve of what happened in those rooms? And why did you go along with Roxy in committing such unspeakable crimes?"

"It's simple really," spoke the Critic with an innocent smile. "It all has to do with needs and necessity."

"No! You're just brainwashed! Please tell me you are just brainwashed!" screamed a frantic voice.

HurricaneAubrey looked behind her and saw a distressed blonde woman standing right there. Jennxpenn had apparently broken free from Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka, with the latter two having tried in vain to prevent Jennxpenn from witnessing what Hurricane Aubrey and the Nerd saw in the preceding rooms.

"Oh no," whispered HurricaneAubrey as she knew what Jennxpenn had just saw.

"Jennxpenn. You such a naïve little girl. I am not brainwashed. If I was brainwashed, I wouldn't be talking to you so elegantly otherwise," commented the Critic.

"Why?! How could you approve of eviscerating innocent people?! Are you sick? What could be going through your mind right now to be so sadistic?" asked Jennxpenn.

HurricaneAubrey saw in the corner of her eye that the Nerd was slowly trying to get to a proper vantage point to shoot the Critic. It appears that the Critic was so enthralled in his conversation with Jennxpenn to have noticed. Clearing his throat, the Critic began to speak, unaware that HurricaneAubrey decided to follow the Nerd up the stairs.

"So inexperienced. Your generation doesn't know real hardship," spoke the Critic as he paced back and forth. "When I was a younger man, I was nothing. As a young adult, I had to clean toilets for a living. I can still smell the shit that was emanating from those toilets."

Jennxpenn was still clenching her fists at her sides as the Critic continued.

"Imagine your legacy being one where your purpose in life was cleaning up the shit of humanity. A real achievement if I do say so myself," said the Critic sarcastically. "That was my reality as a young adult."

HurricaneAubrey saw Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka staring at her heading up the stairs. HurricaneAubrey motioned her head towards the other set of stairs opposite that of the ones the Nerd and herself were climbing on. TamashiiHiroka and Gigguk nodded as they obeyed HurricaneAubrey's command.

"But your story has a happy ending. You became the legendary Nostalgia Critic and became the most successful Internet Police agent of all time. Why throw all of that away by joining with that psychopath Roxy?" asked Jennxpenn as tears were flowing from her eyes.

"It all has to do with fame and fortune," answered the Critic, unaware of four Internet Police agents converging on him from two sides.

"But you already have fame and fortune as the Nostalgia Critic. Why betray us?" asked Jennxpenn.

"But how long will my fame and fortune last if I'm terminated by the Internet Police. My fame as the Nostalgia Critic is already waning online, and without that, I'm nothing. Without the Internet Police or the Critic, I'll be cleaning the shit of humanity once again," said the Critic.

"So, you decided to join Roxy just because you're afraid of losing your job. What about getting welfare? And you can always bounce back by working somewhere else, especially with your credentials as the Nostalgia Critic," spoke Jennxpenn in a soft tone, hoping that the Critic would get back to his senses.

To Jennxpenn's disappointment, the Critic burst out laughing.

"You think I can just get another job out just like that. "You are a stupid little girl," lambasted the Critic. "You know how many people more qualified than me can't even get a job at Chunky's Chicken much less clean toilets. Which choice would you choose if you were in my position: a chance to do something substantial with your life or be given the slight chance of being able to clean toilets for the rest of your life?"

Jennxpenn shook her head in frustration. Being heavily fatigued from fighting in the streets of Rome and from her futile attempt of making the Critic see the errors of his ways, she let out a yawn of exhaustion.

"Getting bored of my justification for my actions, are we?!" shouted the Critic. "If you're so bored, I might just kill you right now."

"I have one final question to ask you," said Jennxpenn through gritted teeth. "Why did innocent people have to suffer the indignity of being tortured and eviscerated while being filmed?"

"For Roxy, that's easy to explain. Torturing people makes her happy. Simple enough. But for me, I have a more reasonable explanation. I want to give their life more meaning. Think about it. They were living pathetic lives before I gave them the opportunity of a lifetime to star in my movie," said the Critic.

Jennxpenn closed her eyes. She was reliving her recent memories of witnessing the result of Cinema Awesome's film production. She could still see the ghastly images of people electrocuted in bathtubs and the remnants of metal hooks that were used to force smiles on the victims' faces.

"Those people would have suffered anyway in this shithole we call earth. At least I'm giving them a sense of immortality through the medium of film," spoke the Critic.

With her face crestfallen, Jennxpenn dropped her weapon and got down on her knees.

"Since you can't face reality, I'll spare you the trouble," said the Critic as he aimed his gun directly at Jennxpenn.

HurricaneAubrey heard two rounds being fired. Instinctively, HurricaneAubrey focused her attention on Jennxpenn to see what state the poor woman was in. Fearing the worst, HurricaneAubrey gazed upon Jennxpenn. Fortunately, Jennxpenn was perfectly fine physically, but psychologically, the defeated woman had her hands over her face.

"Son of a bitch!" yelled a male voice.

HurricaneAubrey then looked upon the Nerd lying at the top of the stairs with his hands over his stomach. As if by magic, the Critic had vanished in an instant. HurricaneAubrey saw Gigguk and TamashiiHiroka approach the Nerd, with these two agents tending to the Nerd's wounds.

"He's bleeding heavily," said TamashiiHiroka. "What if the worst happens?"

"I'm fine. You two go after the Critic," insisted the Nerd.

"We're not going to leave you here to die," said Gigguk.

"After that son of a bitch shot me, he ran in that direction," said the Nerd as he pointed his finger past where Jennxpenn was kneeling. "Apparently, he went down the backstairs of this steel walkway, turned around, and ran past Jennxpenn. Guess he was in too much of a hurry to bother killing Jennxpenn as she remained still."

Upon realizing that the Nerd had pointed towards where Allison was, HurricaneAubrey ran towards that direction.

"Wait!" shouted Gigguk.

HurricaneAubrey ran towards where her sister was. She was fearful that the Critic would have enough time to harm her to his heart's desire. HurricaneAubrey ran through the labyrinth of industrial machinery.

"Please let her be safe," thought HurricaneAubrey desperately.

Bang! Bang!

Several bullets had been fired, ricocheting off the equipment.

"We're both artists, HurricaneAubrey," said the Critic as HurricaneAubrey fired her gun through the gaps of the machinery where she could barely see the Critic. "I specialize in showing how we live in a harsh, cruel world."

HurricaneAubrey remained silent as the Critic ran nearby her as she fired her gun. She couldn't hit the Critic as he continued dodging bullets.

"Like a wise Vulcan once said, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few," said the Critic. "Think of the millions of people who will get to enjoy my film despite the sacrifices of the actors and actresses. But then again, those participants in my film will leave a greater legacy than they ever could on their own. So that would mean a win-win for everyone."

HurricaneAubrey hid behind steam engines as the Critic continued stalking her.

"Show yourself. You can't hide," said the Critic as he held a pistol in his hand.

HurricaneAubrey remained silent as she held her machine gun while she moved behind a boiler.

"Aren't you going to engage in an argument against me?" said the Critic as he marched menacingly near where HurricaneAubrey was hiding.

The clicking and hissing of the industrial equipment continued in the background as the Critic marched to where HurricaneAubrey was hiding.

"Giving me the silent treatment huh," remarked the Critic. "Can't think of a proper counterargument against me. I'm disappointed in you."

She had no words to say as she was focused entirely on surviving her encounter and protecting her sister from the Critic.

"Talk to me!" shouted the Critic as he fired his pistol into the air.

Just as the Critic reached where HurricaneAubrey was hiding, HurricaneAubrey ran, and before she retreated behind more machinery, she fired her machine gun. In her hurry, none of the bullets struck the Critic.

"Running away are we," said the Critic. "You're just a coward. A coward who is apparently mute. You're just the same, scared little girl that you were when you were just a little rookie. And you failed to educate your apprentice about the horrors of the real life. You have failed as a student, a teacher, and as a human being."

HurricaneAubrey saw the Critic load his pistol with bullets.

"Why aren't you talking to me, HurricaneAubrey?!" screamed the Critic as he fired his bullets into the air. "Talk! Talk! Talk! Talk! Talk! Even your pathetic apprentice engaged in a conversation with me. I bet you can't even put words together."

The rookie turned full-fledged Internet Police agent watched as the Critic repeated the process of loading his pistol and firing bullets into the air.

"Come out you fucking bitch!" shouted the Critic. "Come and fight me like a proper agent. You can run but you can't hide from reality. Retreat should never be an option. They are just for cowards like you."

The Critic continued firing his pistol into the air as he challenged HurricaneAubrey to come and face him as an enemy and as an old friend.

"We can create a better world as artists. We have been mocked and chastised by the rest of society as being drains on the economy. But under Roxy's leadership, we can give a middle finger to those naysayers and make an actual impact on the world. We won't be discarded like garbage," said the Critic.

The Critic fired another round of bullets into the air.

"HurricaneAubrey! Where are you?!" screamed the Critic as he fired more bullets. "Why don't you want to talk?!"

Once more, the Critic reached for more bullets to load his pistol. But it soon dawned on the Critic that his supply of bullets was finite.

"Shit," said the Critic as he rummaged in his pockets for spare bullets to put into his pistol.

It was here that HurricaneAubrey sprang into action as she pummeled the Critic to the ground.

"Looks like you learned nothing from our encounter with the Modern Herostratus!" yelled HurricaneAubrey as she pinned the Critic with his body facing directly up.

HurricaneAubrey had her machine gun pointing right at the Critic's face. The Critic merely smiled as he propelled his body upwards, pushing HurricaneAubrey off her feet. This push resulted in HurricaneAubrey losing her grip on her machine gun, with the weapon flying right out of her hands and out of sight behind her.

"As a wise man once said, 'when you have to shoot, shoot don't talk,'" remarked the Critic.

HurricaneAubrey's back was in pain as she saw the Critic running towards her to deliver a crushing punch. With little time to spare, HurricaneAubrey rolled her body away from the spot where the Critic launched his fist downwards. The Critic gave out a yell of pain as his fist struck the ground. HurricaneAubrey then wrestled the Critic to the ground. With no time for witty comments or philosophical statements, HurricaneAubrey used her fists to punch the Critic repeatedly, giving him no time to fight back. She continued until she was sure the Critic was rendered unconscious. With sweat and dirt dripping all over her skin and her clothes, HurricaneAubrey stood up and remained where the Critic's unconscious body was for an undetermined amount of time. Eventually, she saw that Gigguk, Allison, and the rest of the now freed prisoners had arrived to see the aftermath of her battle with the Nostalgia Critic.

"It's over. It's over," said a relieved HurricaneAubrey.

In the days following the Battle of Rome, the Sylvanians had been driven out of Italy. The Italians were in control of their own destiny again. Most of the Internet Police agents had decided that their mission was finished, and they had either returned home or decided to go on vacation. In Rome itself, the Internet Police presence consisted of only the Nerd, HurricaneAubrey, and Jennxpenn. The three of them were accompanied by Allison at the Roman Forum. Jennxpenn had a blanket over herself as she was watching toddler entertainment on her portable device. Meanwhile, the Nerd was talking on his portable device about the fallout of Chief Horner's mixed performance during the War of European Succession. By now, every Internet Police agent knew that the shortcomings of the War of European Succession forced Chief Horner to resign, and as a result, every Internet Police agent would vote for their choice for the next Chief of the Internet Police. The top two candidates with the most votes would be elected Co-Chiefs of the Internet Police. Of course, this system would only be temporary as agents would again vote in November to determine which of the two Co-Chiefs would become the sole Chief of the Internet Police. However, HurricaneAubrey and Allison were now having an intellectual discussion about the Fall of Rome, with the former wanting to get her minds off current events and the latter being ignorant of the Internet Police's existence.

"Why did Rome fall?" asked Allison.

"Why do you ask?" questioned HurricaneAubrey.

"Because I want to know why a civilization that achieved so much collapsed. The Fall of Rome still carries so much impact even today. This explains why George Zazz went on his campaign to purge America of barbaric and other subversive elements. Of course, this does not justify his horrific actions during the Great Schism of America and his overall goal of stroking his ego. However, I do see that one of his motivations was to spare America the same fate as Rome. After all, his admiration of Rome and his lament at its fall can be seen by labeling himself and his supporters as Patricians after the Roman upper class," said Allison.

HurricaneAubrey gazed upon the ruins of the Roman Forum. Just recently, it has been a battleground between Sylvanians and the Internet Police. Then again, the Forum has been trashed by barbarians and individuals who used the Forum as a simple quarry for building their own homes.

"I'm not sure that I'm the best person to be asked this question. I am an art expert, not a historian," said HurricaneAubrey. "People have been asking this question since 476 A.D., the year typically marking the Fall of Rome. I'm no Edward Gibbon."

"Can you at least try? I may be a music expert, but I'm still curious about the Fall of Rome," said Allison.

HurricaneAubrey didn't know where to start. If Allison had asked for a description of Roman art, she could immediately give a thorough and uncontroversial answer. But she had asked for an explanation for Rome's downfall. She was bound to offend someone with her answer. But she saw Allison's thirst for knowledge, and as her older sister, she felt obligated to give an explanation.

"Very well. I'll start by giving you a list of just a few answers for Rome's Fall. Here are some of the most popular explanations for Rome's fall: barbarian attack, corrupt government, being too Apollonian, becoming less masculine, becoming Christian, lead poisoning, diseases, splitting itself in two, not innovating, and oppressing non-Romans," spoke HurricaneAubrey as she lifted her fingers for each reason behind Rome's downfall.

Jennxpenn covered her ears with a blanket as Allison looked dumbfounded by the plethora of speculative reasons for the Fall of Rome.

"So, what's your final answer for why Rome fell," asked Allison.

"I don't know," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Aww," said Allison in a disappointed voice.

"We want simple, clean-cut answers about reality," said HurricaneAubrey. "But that isn't true in most cases, especially regarding the Fall of Rome. Heck, I don't even know if the Fall of Rome was really as apocalyptic as we think it was."

"Really? That's new," said Allison. "Tell me more. I thought the Fall of Rome set back western civilization by centuries with the Dark Ages and all."

"Right. So, there's this YouTuber named Whatifalthist who is a self-proclaimed expert of medieval history. He criticized the Roman Empire as a parasitic state that was heavily dependent on slave labor. He went so far as to say that the Roman Empire deserved to fall during its later years," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Wow. He must have a lot of evidence to back up his claims. Didn't the Fall of Rome lead to the Dark Ages that sent Europe technologically back for centuries?" said Allison.

"Not quite," said HurricaneAubrey. "Until recently, I was also under the notion that the period following Rome's downfall was a bastion of anti-intellectualism and backwardness until the Renaissance. But as it turns out, medieval Europe was innovative by its invention of clocks and banking. Not to mention its adoption of Arabic numerals to replace the cumbersome Roman ones."

"But what about Rome's own inventions like creating architecture like the Colosseum behind us? Weren't the Romans just as or even more technologically innovative as the medieval Europeans?" said Allison.

"According to Whatifalthist, no. He stated that the Romans borrowed their innovations from other civilizations, like the Greeks, and that architecture was the only area that they really excelled in," said HurricaneAubrey. "He also stated that the reason we see Rome as a bastion of progress was because we were impressed by the art and architecture they left behind."

"I know all about how lovingly you like to stare at Roman art, especially of those muscle-bound men," said Allison in a teasing manner.

"Stop it," said HurricaneAubrey as she playfully pushed Allison on the shoulder.

The Nerd stared back at the two women, and he gave a quick smile before going back to his profanity-filled discussion on his portable device. Jennxpenn just covered her ears as she continued watching Teletubbies on her portable device.

"Anyway, he went against the mainstream idea that the world would be more technologically advanced had the Roman Empire never fell. On the contrary, he believed that the world would be centuries behind our own timeline had Rome never fell," said HurricaneAubrey.

"So, what Whatifalthist believes is that the barbarians that took down the Roman Empire were responsible for Europe's technological progress and innovation. I find it hard to think that the wanton slaughter of Rome's citizens by the likes of Attila the Hun would lead to a better world. Do you really believe this statement?" asked Allison.

"I don't know," said HurricaneAubrey. "Another YouTuber named Cody (whom I had the pleasure of personally meeting last month) runs a channel called AlternateHistoryHub. He puts forth the idea that Rome would just continue innovating and even industrializing had it avoided its fall. AlternateHistoryHub proposes that an industrialized Rome would be engaged in a Cold War with China."

"What?" questioned Allison with a puzzled look on her face.

"I know it's bizarre," said HurricaneAubrey.

"So which school of thought do you follow?" asked Allison.

"I don't know," said HurricaneAubrey. "I know you hate me repeating 'I don't know' but the Fall of Rome is complicated and confusing. It's the same with most of life."

"Life is hard to understand," said Allison.

"That's a massive understatement. That's why I'm going to resign from any job and spend the rest of my days watching toddler entertainment. There's no pain and suffering for me in my new future," shouted Jennxpenn.

HurricaneAubrey began to open her mouth to state her objections, but the Nerd had placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Let her be. She made her decision, and we'll make our own decision. I would like to have a word with you," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey got up and started to follow the Nerd when she stopped and turned to face Allison.

"Are you alright by yourself here?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"Don't worry, I'll just be here enjoying real food," said Allison as she pulled out a box of ice cream out of her purse.

"Enjoy yourself," said HurricaneAubrey with a smile.

Leaving Allison behind to consume genuine Italian gelato, HurricaneAubrey followed the Nerd to the Arch of Septimius Severus.

"Have you heard? I've got enough votes from our Internet Police agents to be declared Co-Chief," said the Nerd.

"And did I get at least as many votes as you?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"No. You were beaten by someone else," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey didn't know what to think.

"Aren't you going to congratulate me," said the Nerd with an annoyed look on his face.

"I just… I just thought that I would be declared Co-Chief seeing how I brought the War of European Succession to a successful conclusion as Supreme Commander. Surely that would be enough to be declared Co-Chief," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Maybe it is because I have more experience as an Internet Police agent than you," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey had to reluctantly agree.

"Plus, I think Internet Police agents are more focused on looking at Chief Horner's failure in the bombing of Prague than any victories achieved. Not to mention that Roxy is still at large after the Liberation of Italy," said the Nerd.

"True," said HurricaneAubrey as she straightened herself.

It was not as if she was power-hungry, but HurricaneAubrey had wanted to enact reforms that would protect Allison and many others from the scum of the web.

"So, who's the other Co-Chief who received a substantial number of votes?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

The Nerd searched through his portable device for an image of the other Co-Chief. Looking upon his device with scorn, he showed HurricaneAubrey his rival Co-Chief's campaign website.

"TessaNetting," said HurricaneAubrey as she gazed upon the blonde woman wearing a blue bowtie.

"Yeah. I fucking hate her," said the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey scrolled through several pages on TessaNetting's campaign website. Apparently, she is known for two things: she was a huge Harry Potter fan. And she does musical numbers summarizing the events that occurred in a year. She happened to stumble across a campaign video titled TessaNetting and the Prisoner of the Dark Lord. It depicted an actor portraying the Nostalgia Critic as the Dark Lord and the actor playing the part of the Nerd was shown as the Dark Lord's feeble servant.

"You will do whatever I tell you to do, my faithful servant," spoke the Dark Lord Critic.

"Yes master," said the servant Nerd.

"And if you step one toe out of line, you'll be punished," said the Dark Lord Critic as he pointed his wand at a fox plushie. "Crucio."

With the use of wires and a voice box, the fox plushie appeared to be writhing in pain. A terrible scream made by only an innocent animal being torture was heard. The Dark Lord Critic lifted his wand and the screaming stopped, with the fox plushie looking worse for the wear.

"Yes master," said the servant Nerd as he kissed the feet of the Dark Lord Critic. "I love you with all my heart. I'll always obey your every command no matter what."

"Very good my humble servant," said the Dark Lord Critic.

"Expelliarmus!" shouted a female voice off camera.

With the use of special effects, a scarlet light flew out of the wand of a female wizard with glasses and a lightning bolt scar on her forehead. The light apparently knocked the wand out of the hands of Dark Lord Critic.

"Potter! I'll get you for this," said the Dark Lord Critic as he dropped to his knees to search for his wand on the forest floor.

"I'm just a good friend of the Boy who Lived and the Chosen One. I'm TessaNetting, and I would like to be your next Chief of the Internet Police," said TessaNetting as she spoke to the camera.

"Master. Master. I'll help you look for your wand," said the whimpering servant Nerd as he groveled on the forest floor looking for the Dark Lord Critic's wand.

The end of the political commercial was marked with white words appearing on the screen as TessaNetting shook her head as she stomped her foot on the Dark Lord Critic's hand, with the Dark Lord crying like an infant. The servant Nerd was pathetically trying to get TessaNetting's foot off his beloved master's hand, with the servant Nerd being irrationally devoted to the Dark Lord.

"Don't be a naïve fool, vote for TessaNetting," said the voice-over speaking the words on the screen.

HurricaneAubrey gave a little hiccup as she began smirking. She then noticed the shadow of the real Nerd towering over her. Wanting to be cautious, HurricaneAubrey let out a fake cough.

"Nasty woman isn't she," said the Nerd.

"Uh yeah. She's nasty all right," said HurricaneAubrey hastily, wanting to get on the Nerd's good side.

"Who does she think she is calling me the Dark Lord Critic's faithful servant for wanting to spend the budget on improvements? I'm not a bitch to the Critic," said the Nerd.

"So how are you going to defeat her when November comes around?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"I'll just have to convince the public that TessaNetting is the appointed successor to Madame Austerity herself. I don't know why any agent would vote for Madame Austerity 2.0," said the Nerd.

"And who is going to help you run your campaign?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"Ah. That role would go to someone whom I can trust: Sean, also known as the Smeghead from Cinematic Excrement," answered the Nerd.

"Sean?" inquired HurricaneAubrey.

"Yes Sean. A man with similar interests to me. We're both Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fans and aficionados of James Bond media," said the Nerd. "Hopefully, no one is going to assist TessaNetting on her campaign. I can't allow someone as incompetent as former Chief Horner. She made the Critic betray us."

"Do you really hold Chief Horner fully accountable for the Critic's double-crossing us?" questioned HurricaneAubrey.

"Think about it. The Critic himself stated that he joined Roxy to give himself a more financially stable future. If only Madame Austerity didn't try so hard to cut costs on practically everything, then the Critic wouldn't feel so threatened to want to switch sides before being forced into a life of cleaning toilets," said the Nerd.

"It's really a simple matter of money. It's always money," said HurricaneAubrey.

"It's tragic really. If Madame Austerity wasn't so strict about spending, then the Critic would still be our friend," said the Nerd.

"So, you're running on a platform of ambitious programs and spending," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Exactly," said the Nerd. "We can't afford to let Madame Austerity 2.0 become Chief of the Internet Police. Do I have your vote?"

"You want my endorsement?" asked HurricaneAubrey.

"You have some clout inside of the Internet Police. My campaign will become a lot easier if I get your vote," stated the Nerd.

HurricaneAubrey turned away from the Nerd and placed her hands over her head. After a few seconds, HurricaneAubrey turned to face the Nerd.

"I'm undecided," answered HurricaneAubrey. "I need more time to think about it."

"Fine," said the Nerd. "I'll see where your loyalties lie in November. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a phone call to make to Sean."

HurricaneAubrey walked away from the Nerd as he was making the phone call. She began to walk past Jennxpenn.

"I'm sorry," whispered HurricaneAubrey as Jennxpenn ignored her.

HurricaneAubrey approached Allison. It appears that Allison had finished a whole box of ice cream.

"This is heaven!" exclaimed Allison as she pulled out a bottle of wine. "Want some, Aubrey?"

"No thanks. You can have it all to yourself after what you've been through," said HurricaneAubrey.

"Thanks," said Allison. She quickly finished the whole bottle. "When I was trapped, I was full of negative thoughts and lost all hope in the world. But when I thought about you, I felt optimism returning to me."

HurricaneAubrey smiled.

"I wish I could have experienced my home country under better circumstances," remarked Allison.

"We still can," said HurricaneAubrey. "I've got time until the end of June. Let me show you the best of Italy."

"Thanks sis," said Allison.

HurricaneAubrey gazed upon the setting sun. Unbeknownst to her little sister, HurricaneAubrey was weeping. They were both tears of sorrow and joy. In her mind, she thought about how she had failed Jennxpenn.

"Maybe I could have been much less confrontational with her. Or perhaps I could have taught her more about coping with the harshness of reality," thought HurricaneAubrey. "But instead, my apprentice has decided to quit the Internet Police and retreat into isolationism surrounded by infantile pursuits."

Then the sight of the Critic lying motionless on the ground entered her mind.

"Forevermore will I have to look back on my memories with the Critic with bitterness and regret," thought HurricaneAubrey.

Then again, she had achieved a small triumph when she rescued Allison from the Sylvanians, and as a result, Allison had once again placed her trust in her older sister after the strain in their relationship during the Great Schism of America.

"I may have lost Jennxpenn and the Critic, but I have won my little sister's trust again," thought HurricaneAubrey as she wiped her eyes as she gave a small smile. "And that small triumph is all that matters right now."

Please review this story to provide me some advice on improving it. What other internet personalities or memes should the Internet Police encounter?