'i-i'm actually going to sleep next to kazu-kun' Rise thought over and over again while stealing glance on the sleeping Kazuya. "He looks peaceful, i wonder what's he dreaming about.." Rise whispered quietly enough to not wake him up. Little did she know that Kazuya was still awake even if his eyes are shut closed.
"..I like you Kazu.." Rise confessed knowing Kazuya was asleep but was shocked when his face turned red and tried to hide his blush behind his hand. "Y-Y-You were awake?" Rise Stutters from embarrassment and face gone tomato. "S-sorry i d-didn't mean to, i just couldn't sleep" Kuzuya too stutters it was a surprise confession which both side were shocked. Rise didn't plan to confess that night but that change.
"It's fine.. i would've confess sooner or later" now both were sitting down rather than laying down. "I-I see." Kazuya was still speechless by the thought that the idol likes him.
"um kazu-kun i would like to make my confession proper if that's alright with you" Rise cautiously said while looking down. Kazuya touched her chin so that she wouldn't look down and nod in agree "Sure."
blushed heavily but gathered courage to confess once again. "I-I like you kazu-kun. I don't know why though but i know that i like you. One day you.. you took over my mind like a virus and i'm infected. You always bite your nails when you're thinking or bored. You like kids. your slender, tall but muscular body is warm. The way you took care and protect the others. Your long and slender fingers, The way you talk, The way you have a serious face, The way you laugh, Your cooking, The way you play your guitar and sing, The way you get irritated, When you avoided interacting to people because you don't want them to bother you. The way you act strong like a tiger but have a heart of a cat. I like them all, but most importantly Your you. I like you Kazu-kun"
Now kazuya was looking away. Knowing his face looks like a fresh tomato 'she like's every bit of me, she even describe me as a virus.' He thought but he bowed in apologetically "Thank you for saying you like me but Rise i'm sorry but i can't accept your confession. i like you but not in that way i'm sorry." And that made Rise sad even though she got rejected she will not give up. "That's okay kazu-kun but i won't give up" She says with a smiling confidence. "I'll make you look my way"
The two was awkwardly silent after the confession, Neither the two have anything to say. By time drifting away the two was fast asleep.
Kazuya's PoV
I woke up without opening my eyes. To think Rise has feelings for someone like me. I still don't get it why would someone bother themselves to someone like me. I'm weak i know that even if the others are denying it. It is what i think i am, It won't change cause someone told me it's not true. Even if someone said it I doubt that it will change me. Thinking about yourself weight more than someone thinking about you. This thinking alone gives me a headache. Headache first thing in the morning? not a good sign. Well whatever I'm gonna sleep more. This pillow smells nice it's squishy too wonder when i did i get a pillow like this "ngh ka-kazu.." Eh? the pillow talk? Wait pillow doesn't talk. Kazuya open your eyes, wait i'm getting kinda scared. I opened my eyes one at a time brown hair "Ri-Rise?" Ahh right she slept here last night, forgotten about that.
""Ka-Kazu y-your hand pl-please." My hand? it's still a hand. I looked where my hand is. It is at- I quickly removed my hand covering my bright red face. What have i done? I'm shaking i need to apologize "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, i was asleep. I'm really sorry." I kept my composure composed. I know what will happened if i will panicked. the situation will get worse than it is. "It's okay Kazu. I understand." Rise accepted my apolegy with a bright smile. It actually light up the room just like that time. Ah no good she's too cute might as well- no no no Kazu no your friend likes Rise and you don't want any mess before the festival. I looked away from Rise "Come on i'll walk you home. Your grandma must be worried" i looked back to see her reaction and she nodded.
Walking Rise back to her house was not entirely quiet. Rise would talk about her days about being an idol. Then the time she first move here in Inaba, how she met the investigation group. We discussed about the tv How it was happening. For some reasons the people who were brought in the Tv has some problems of their own, troubling them or not being able to accept their faults, regrets and how they are. Somehow like a silent murder suicide. A suicide you don't actually want but you're the one who will kill yourself. The silent because if you die inside that tv the police of detectives will not be able to trace you or how you die. That's where the investigation group comes in, They saves people trying to help them to accept themselves So that the shadow won't be able to kill. That brought me back why did my shadow go berserk? "Hey Rise why did my shadow go berserk when i neglected it?" I ask her while i stared up at the clouds.
That moment she stayed quiet so i looked at her curiously then she stared at me and softened her expression "Getting interested? well i guess that's normal since it's happening to you." Well of course i'll get interested i'm a part of it weather i like it or not anyway she didn't answer my question "Hey my question answer it" I pinched her cheeks playfully " O-Okwe sow staph playeng with mah cheeks." i let go of her cheeks raiseing my hand letting her speak "Your shadow has gone berserk because you neglected it. If you accepted your shadow it will be a persona but if you neglected it it will go berserk. Like for example if you get positive score in your test you will be happy. If negative you will be sad." I see so troubled shadows are the neutral and waiting for the results that will be given. Having lost in our conversation we have reached her house.
"What do we have here? Isn't it too early to date?" A familiar voice came up to us. It was Yousuke-senpai with Chie-senpai. "I don't to be told something like that by someone like you two who is having a date early this morning" I simply said with a mischievous smile. They got bright red so easy to read. I looked at Rise who was having a hard time to contain her laughter "No w-we-we're not dating we just sa-saw each other" Chie-senpai was so red while explaining "Ye-yeah we um ran into ea-each other ah Damn you Kazuya wait you didn't deny having a date wi-with Rise so That means?" Yousuke quickly covered up the date and returned the teasing to us not like something like that would ever affect me. But if i deny it Rise will be hurt if not Ichijo and me will have a fight. "Not yet senpai but i'm hoping someday" Rise answered with an innocent smile. damn that smile always got me "Eh so you two are not dating? I thought you two were already dating" Chie-senpai bluntly said that Rise got so red at that moment. "Well then see you at school later" Yousuke-senpai said.
It was still 5am "Well then i should go now see you at school" I waved at her and she waved back. Now that i think of it ever since i accepted the shadow i became more open. I accepted her death that moment and promised i will live the way she wanted to me. But deep down there was still something lingering on that no one neither me could contain. It still hurts. hey Kyoko what would you do if you are me? It's been hard knowing you spoiled me being with you always.
Back then Kyoko would always wake me up and we would walk together to school. When lunch she would always give me a bento even if i didn't ask for one. The past me would always think of marrying her in the future. She would smile for me to light up my day. I know that it is the past that i wouldn't forget no matter what anyone says. Kyoko was my first love i never thought of her like a sister all those years. I was a Trouble maker that kyoko will always smack the back of my head for doing something inexcusable and would give me a lot of hearing that would make my ears hurt. But all of this all of her i miss all of them. Never thought it will end just like that. Well kazuya as kyoko always says and end of things will lead to a new things. Guess she's right. Well Yu said i'll get to practice later after school in the dungeon.
School
It's the lectures again. Man i'm bored i wish i could cut classes but no one's gonna cover for me and i need to make up with my attendance. It's not like my grades are slipping. Hm i wonder what Rise is doing aside being my classmate she's also my seatmate which made it easier to look at her without distracting the teacher. I glance at her and she seems to be doodling on her notebook which is cute. Well she is always cute i had to admit that no one could ever overlook her looks cause she's cute and cheerful. Guess that's what Ichijo saw at Rise. Why am i getting irritated anyway not like Rise is mine or i like her that way.
I laid my back at the back part of the chair. I didn't bother listening to the teacher since i figured i'll get more sleepy than i am right now. So i'll wait, and wait, and wait, and- I can't do this. I'm a patient person but i can't handle this i rubbed my temple thinking on what to do should i just doodle? or skip? or silently sleep? oh there it is. I torn a piece of small paper and write 'Rise i'm going to sleep so can you be my look out' I gave to her and put my hands together saying please while not making a noise.
Rise's Pov
hmm it need to be better. hm? kazu put a piece of paper at my desk. i looked at him titlted my head on what is it. Then he put his hands together and saying please without making a noise. pfft what is he even doing, i opened the paper he gave to me 'Rise i'm going to sleep so can you be my look out' and there was a drawing of an emoji playfully eyes closed while putting a tongue out. pfft he is so cute like a little kid sometimes. I nodded at his wish then he smiled eyes close with a big smile like a thank you so much. At that gesture he put his head down and slept. Once again he filled my head with only him. He's a devil sometimes too and there's nothing i can do but like him more than i do now.
Now that i think of it does he know i'm the Risette? i guess he knows since his bandmates know. As the time flew by and the teacher's boring lecture come to an end. Time to wake up kazu. He's really peaceful when he is sleeping. I wonder what's he dreaming of, maybe it's kyoko.. I'm really bitter about this time to disappear bad thoughts I swore that i will take over his heart someday and i will not give up on that. "Kazu wake up, It's lunch break let's go to the rooftop together" i woke him up while slightly shaking him "okay" His husky deep voice i like the sound of it He got up with his bento? "Did you make that kazu?" he looked at me with a brow raised up "Hm? oh the bento? nope, my mom made it" His mom. i only saw her once it was the first time i got to his house she was really beautiful had an eyes like Kazu. I wonder what his dad looks like.
We reached the rooftop and it was Yu-senpai and Yukiko-senpai alone together. Yukiko-senpai was so flustered at one glance i know what's happening here. I looked at kazu and he has a mischievous grin at his face, He looked at me thinking the same thing 'their dating let's tease them you go for yukiko-senpai i'll go for yu' that's what he was saying with his grin. For some reason we knew what we were thinking. I nodded in agreement and go straight to the plan. he does the same thing "Yu alone with a girl that's something" Kazu said with a smirk. "Yukiko senpai that's awesome" I said with a playful wink. "Me and yukiko are just friends" Yu senpai bluntly said to his defense "yes we are just friends" Yukiko senpai said in agreement. "hm? we didn't say anything about you being friends or not though" Kazu is really good at this. i better up my game "Yu senpai and yukiko senpai are on the first name basis already" Now we got them yu senpai was speechless and Yukiko senpai too "We didn't mean to hide it or something" Yu senpai sigh in defeat.
"Well that's what you got for bringing up my perfomance cd" Kazu said with a dead eyes. But then the rest of the group just entered the Rooftop. "Anyway later Kazuya you will need a weapon for the training so me and Yousuke will be bringing you to central shopping district after classes, The others could wait at junes" Yu senpai said.
Kazuya's PoV
Weapon? Ah that's right. Yu has two handed sword. Yousuke senpai has a kunai. Chie senpai uses her martial arts. Yukiko senpai uses fans. Naoto uses Guns. kanji uses a chair that was surprising but can be deadly so i guess its effective then Rise what is Rise's weapon. I looked at Rise and tilted my head in curiosity. "Um what's Rise's weapon? She's the only one i didn;t saw with weapon last time excluded Chie senpai since she uses her strength." Yu came to my side "She doesn't fight" Eh like a queen? and the others are her pawn? "She's the map of our group" Yu added "Oh she's like the navigator?" Yu nodded.
I'm hungry. I haven't touched my food since we got here I should eat it now while i still have the time. Then it was peaceful us eating together while the other's making tease at each other. "Kazu that looks yummy mind if i try?" Rise asked looking at my food, well she wouldn't back off if i did say no so i just grab a food and carefully placed it inside her mouth. Rise became quiet since that i became worried so i checked on her and she was so red like a tomato. Does she have a fever? "Are you okay?" I put my hand on her forehead for a check. She doesn't have any fever that's a relief. "Im Okay.." Rise reassured me. Now that i think about it. oh it's because of the gesture i gave to her. Now i became conscious of it i'll be embarrassed. Don't be like that.
"Kazuya-kun can i taste?" Yukiko senpai asked "ahh sure but it's really spicy-Ah Rise Are you okay with spicy..?" Yousuke grabbed my shoulder "She is alright with explosive spicy don't worry" E-explosive s-s-spicy? well i see it was really the gesture i made earlier. i hid my face with my hands so they won't see my redness. oh god please let the day end i'm so embarrassed that i couldn't even eat my food.
So the lunch ended and the class ended. Now i need to choose my weapon The group separated as two groups. As we made our way to the central shopping district we discussed about the shadow on how they are forming and how to defeat them. How they ended up as saving them on how they discover things. They haven't found the culprit neither how they capture the victims. They also discussed about the midnight channel on how the victim was posted there only in the time of midnight.
"So you need a weapon huh." the clerks says while rubbing his chin. He told me to look around and see if i find something i'm are interested in. Guess I should do that. While i was scanning the weapons none of it was my tempo. Yousuke senpai pushed me so hard that i ended up falling in front "oops Sorry bout that kazuya-kun" He said while scratching his cheeks. i rubbed the back of my neck then i saw it my weapon. It's a two swords not the same but has the same weight. It was heavy so i liked it. The desige it seems like one of the swords in rpg games which interested me more. one was white and the other was black. I placed it in the counter it "Good eye boy" The clerk surprised me "Eh?" So it's a good weapon? that's good to know.
With that i got my weapon which is kinda unusual for high schoolers like me to have but if it is to save people i'll have it no matter what people say. We reached junes and there was the group waiting and they are wearing glasses? "Ah Kazu-kun I have something to give you." He reached out a glasses with a color of white at one side then the other side was black and green. "Thanks teddie but what is this for?" My eyesight is not bad though "It's for the mist inside the Dungeon" Naoto explained mist? If i remember there was kind of a mist when i was kidnapped but my eyesight got adjusted to it so i didn't know about it. "Oh i see" They all eyed me like i did something wrong. wait did i just say something wrong? "Hey Kazu What's your weapon?" Chie senpai asked with a big puppy eyes. They all had curious eyes but yu stopped them "Come on let's go you can see it in the dungeon" They all nodded in agreement no wonder yu is the leader. He is composed and knew how to lead them.
one by one we enter the tv inside the junes appliance store. It truly is amazing wow "So where are we taking Kazu, senpai?" Rise asked Yu "To the-" i interrupt them "I wanna see my dungeon" Yu stared at me before he agreed "But senpai it's the most dangerous dungeons here." Rise disagreed, Dangerous? most dangerous my dungeon? "Rise it will be fine" With that Rise stopped and guided the whole group to my dungeon "Hey yu why is my dungeon the most dangerous?" it's still all new to me so i got to asked a lot of questions "Dungeons are created based on the feelings so your feelings a much more bigger than others" So this midnight channel this tv world all of it is based on our emotions, feelings and secrets.
"Here we are" Rise said all this time her face says it all she's worried. "Don't worry it's gonna be okay" I patted her head and smiled to reassure her. i draw out my weapon "Kazu summon your persona and see how powerful it is" Rise used telepathy alright "Coronam scurra!"
...after practice they go back home...
Coronam scurra. meaning crown joker. it's half black and white has a crown and has a mischievous smile. black on the left and white on the left. weapons position is the same. At this moment i hear screams and crying for a moment at my left side and a peaceful moment at my right side. Once i composed myself all of it was gone. My face when i summon my persona it had a black lines on the left side and my eyes turned red that's what the others say. element dark lighting and blue fire.
"Its a dark persona..." hm why are they looking at me? "What?" they came closer what do they want "Dark persona? what do you mean kazu?" Erk i said it out loud guess i should tell them "My persona is a dark persona but at the same time a light persona"it's like a high breed or something. "There hasn't been a dark persona and how do you say so?" Naoto asked curiously that made me look away cause her gaze hurts and i don't even know why. "Well when i summoned my persona i heard.. screams and cries. Emotions overflowing. Hysteria.. uncontrollable emotion" they tensed up when they heard my answer but cut off the slacked when ichijo and the two came. "Yo why is everyone tensed?" He grabbed a chair and put it next to Rise of course he would do that. And again why am i irritated about this. But Rise is looking at me literally looking at me i can even feel her gaze. So i looked away.
"Heyo Ichijo-kun You don't have school?" Yukiko Senpai asked "Nope we're only here till the festival remember? ahh nope until the end of our semester break" Wait if he will go back to tokyo and Rise and him are together what would happened? "Hey y-you're not just going to leave Rise right?" Rise eyed me quickly she was hurt by me. Its the worst feeling. "Of course not i'll bring her with me" I looked at him surprised. but i remembered if that came true there was nothing i could even do. I looked away "..I see"
Happy chattering planning on what to do tomorrow for the festival and on the semester break. But there is one thing on my mind that keeps me wondering if its okay to tell them. Well only Yu know it and i hope they understand but i know it will be hard but argh whatever i'll say it to them later. "Oh yeah Kazuya did you know Rise is the Risette?" Hm? ichijo and risette wait who was risette again? "Ha? Who is Risette?" i seriously don't know "Eh? you don't know risette?" Rise was surprised hmm well all i know is that the risette is an idol in hiatus "Nope, not at all" Ichijo was still laughing and i don't even understand why "see i told you he doesn't know you are Risette Neither the Risette"
...After explaining...
"Oh so Rise is the Risette well That's awesome but why stop?" Rise froze like it was the end "Well because i was losing myself. Like the people around me likes me because im Risette not Rise the real me" oh She was scared to loss herself. Being here in Inaba having Friends who don't take you up as an idol makes her relaxing. She found herself here in inaba. No wonder it is a wonderful place for her. "Ah we gotta go bye" Ichijo left in a flash. oh well seems like it's time to say it to them. "Would you like to go to my house? We need to discuss something" Yu looked at me wondering i gave him a signal that i will say 'That' incident. "Sure let's go"
...Matsuda residence...
we were all in the living room sitting down staying silent but Yu first spoke up "so what is it you wanted to talk about?" i scratch the back of my head. Hear goes nothing "The shadow reacting to our little bit of problems and feelings and emotions so i thought i needed to tell you this. I know it won't be a good reason but i want you to listen" little by little i wanted to back of but right now isn't the time to back off. "Well as you know I had a trauma. I was lost, I didn't move forward but backward eveything was gone that night." Saying this is hard i feel like somethings stuck in my throat But i got to say this "When the time i couldn't officially let go of her I-I" The words got stuck i'm reached for my neck speak come on speak "I tried to take away my life." i didn;t know why i was panting heavily and the weights are gone i feel better but nauseous at the same time.
All of them were in shocked except for Yu who already know about it. Rise stood up "Why.. Why did you want to take away you life?" She's on the verge of crying "i-i was lost.. i know that it isn't an acceptable reason but" I feel bad all of it is running in circles. I covered my mouth knowing something but finished my sentence "It was so hard that i almost gave up" After i say that i ran to the bathroom as soon as possible then vomitted "Kazu!" Rise ran up to me "Kazuya are you alright?" Chie Senpai was worried and the others too. After i washed up i returned to the living room with Rise. "I'm sorry i always feel nauseous talking about it but now i'm fine" Rise looked down "i'm sorry i shouldn't have ask you" She feels guilty "It's fine it was my decision to tell you guys and you deserved to know. I just said that to all of you so you will know and the other part is to release a weight i've been carrying"
"um Kazuya You're not doing the.. you know cutting?" Yukiko senpai asked Cutting. It came to my mind to do that but I don't see the point of cutting wrist. If you wanna die then do it Quickly. But if not then don't. But Don't even think about wanting to die it's a shameful act. You gotta live your life. Even if it doesn't go the way you want you still have to live it That's what kyoko said when a classmate was doing that "No i don't do that" I showed my wrist to reassure them.
After dinner the group was saying farewell then one member stayed as always "come on follow me" Rise demanded and there was no taking for no as an answer. She took me in my room "Strip." Okay wait what? "Ha? What do you mean strip?" Then she got a box wait that's a first aid box. "take off you shirt" She wouldn't be at peace if i didn't do it but there is no need since that incident happened a month ago. i took of my shirt and she saw the scar i got. It wasn't really big but it was deep since a knife was place there. "I told you there is nothing to worry about" A tear drops eh she's crying. What? "why? um it's gonna be fine"
"good to know You didn't harm yourself no more" And with that we stayed for a moment and talked before i walked her home.
It truly is a town.
A/N
So Coronam scurra latin of Crown Joker. This power is just made up and not made by the game. The powers will be made by me. Hope you liked it thanks for reading! :)))
