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Written for; Hogwarts Assignment 10, Law and Government Task 4: Write about someone feeling left out.
Word Count - 513
To Be Left Aside (To Be Loved)
They fall asleep holding hands.
They try to hide it from you, but you notice anyway. Mostly because when you wake up in the night, sweating and panting and alone, they're still holding hands.
It makes you feel… empty.
They sit together, and they whisper behind their hands when they think you're not looking and they talk as though you're not there.
It makes you feel… lonely.
When Ron leaves, you try to help Hermione feel better, but you can't. It's not you she wants, it's never been you that she's wanted, and you've long accepted that. But, for now, you're all she's got and when she smiles it's at you.
It makes you feel… guilty.
Ron tries so hard when he comes back. He tries to win her favour, he tries to make it up to you without saying sorry, because' he's never been good at saying sorry and that's okay. For a while, it's the three of you against the world.
It makes you feel… wanted.
You walk to your death with your parents at your side, and you think of the two of them. They'll have each other, and you're glad about that. As much as you hate being a third wheel, you're happy that they have each other.
It makes you feel… relieved.
You live and you win and it's over.
You don't know how to feel about that.
You try so hard to make it work with Ginny. You go on dates, you kiss her and you hug her, and you hold her hand when she cries with grief and anger, and you hate it because you don't… you don't look at her the way Ron looks at Hermione.
It makes you feel… resentful.
Ginny leaves you, and you don't blame her. She promises you can be friends, and oddly you believe her, because this whole time you've been more like friends than lovers. Ron and Hermione comfort you, but they're holding hands and you want a love like theirs.
It makes you feel… isolated.
Hermione kisses you. Her lips are gentle on yours and your hands rest at her waist automatically, but this is wrongwrongwrong because Hermione is Ron's. Except, Ron is there, and his lips are rougher than Hermione's, chapped and firmer and maybe, maybe it isn't wrong if it's both of them.
It makes you feel… confused.
They want you. They both want you. You don't have to be a third wheel anymore, because they want you to hold their hands, to go on dates with them and to share their bed. You… you can be a part of something. They say that you were always meant to be together, the three of you. You believe them.
It makes you feel… happy.
You're familiar with feeling left out. It's happened all of your life, and you're used to it. You get pushed aside, unwanted and unnecessary.
Now though… now you're held close. You're wanted and needed, and you love it. Ron and Hermione hold your hands when you fall asleep.
It makes you feel… loved.
