It was easier than she thought. It took just a few days for Meg to gather all the bits and pieces of information to confirm everything Clayton Webb had told her. She asked here and there. A passing comment to the Petty Officer Coates. An innocent question about her temporary office and its decor to one of the Marine guards. A friendly chat over lunch with Sturgis Turner. An overheard piece of conversation in the break room. And quite an extensive reading of old case files. Rabb and Mackenzie on opposing teams. Rabb and Mackenzie together. Doing everything they could to beat each other. Doing everything they could to support each other. Rabb and Mackenzie on carriers, embassies and military bases. Rabb and Mackenzie in Afghanistan, Iraq and Russia.

She did not want the official though. She wanted private. She did not like what she found out. Apparently, there had been an office pool on Harm and the Colonel for years and in fact, it was still running, even though periodically it was being abandoned and revived. Meg comforted herself with the idea of the four thousand something dollars currently in the pool. It meant that in the greatest probability the two JAG officers in question never entered a relationship. Many more questions later, her hopes that Clayton Webb had lied to her were quickly disappearing. It turned out that Harm was indeed overly protective of the woman, to the point of throwing away his career for her - even when it was not necessary, asked or wanted. Apparently, Webb also did not lie when he said Harm sabotaged the Colonel's relationships. Apparently, there had been some lawyer who actually convinced the woman to leave JAG, but before long she was back and Harm was seen telling the lawyer off and forcing him to leave the building. More disturbingly Harm did his best to dissuade "Mac" from marrying an Australian officer, who was crazy for her. He was apparently very openly negative about the man in question for months and years, made fun of the relationship as if it had been a whim and actually monopolized the Colonel on the night of her engagement party. Nobody knew what the two said or did on the Admiral's porch, but their absence was too obvious to everyone, as was the awkward manner in which they treated each other for some time after that. Meg dismissed the idea that Harm plunged his tomcat into the sea just to stop the wedding, as somebody suggested because that was simply absurd. But whatever really happened or did not happen that night resulted in no marriage for the Colonel. And now there was Webb and he claimed his own relationship with Sarah Mackenzie was too foundered by Harmon Rabb. The scuttlebutt had no info on that, surprisingly, but it confirmed that the Colonel was indeed the significant other to the spook.

Since meeting with Webb Meg has been on edge. Her hopes and dreams of a future with Harm seemed awfully uncertain now. She wished she could go back a month, or even a week when the only things she knew for sure were that he was unmarried, unattached and he cared for her deeply. When she closed her eyes she could still feel his lips on her that time she decided to throw the caution to the wind. He did not push her away. No. He liked it. But now...

She hasn't seen him for over a week. He was on leave and few people were privy to the information as to why. In fact, she suspected only she and the General really knew at first. Harm was obsessing over Mackenzie, the woman with the face of the murdered Dianne Schonke and his obsession was making him blind. He was hurting so many people with his blindness. Meg. Webb. This Sarah Mackenzie. And himself.


Finally, he returned to work. She felt her heart fluttering when she saw him entering the bullpen in his winter blues. He looked tired but calm, a complete opposite to what he had seemed before. Since her return to Washington, she noticed he was constantly on edge, almost agitated, even angry. There had been nervous energy surrounding him. The man giving her a friendly smile and a wave right now seemed an entirely different person.

There was no time to properly talk during the day, work swallowing them both until eventually she found herself sharing a lunch table in the canteen with him.

"How are you?" she asked emphatically. "How is... everything?"

"Better," he answered with a little smile. "Everything is definitely better and I hope it will continue to be."

"I know it may sound mean but... I was asking mainly about you, Harm," she admitted and fixed her eyes on his face. "I am glad that the Colonel is recovering, but out of the two of you it is you who is my ... friend."

"The answer stands, Meg," he said simply.

"Are you sure? Because you look rather worn out. Maybe becoming a full-time nurse was not the best decision you have ever made?"

If he noticed the bitter undertone he didn't let on. "She needed me," he answered simply. "You know, I realize I might look a little worse for wear, but just this morning... she finally started to move about and she made us both breakfast. And she smiled, Meg. She actually smiled and at that moment I realized that no matter the trouble and problems, everything is worth it as long as she smiles at me like that." He had a wistful, faraway look in his eyes. "And I told myself: You idiot, you have always known that, why are you so surprised? I forgot! Can you believe that? I actually forgot. And it is not the first time I forgot something about her. Truth is that after all these years... well, I suppose I took her for granted. Always thought she would just be there, still the same and completely stationary, just ... waiting for me I guess. It took me her almost dying for me to remember. Twice now. I am such an idiot."

Lunch forgotten on his plate, he kept talking quietly, more to himself than to her. Meg felt the ugly pangs of jealousy and reminded herself that this was all wrong. She tightened her hold on the fork and viciously stabbed her salad.

"Harm, do you actually think this is the best-case scenario for her or for you?" she countered, snapping him out of the dreamland. "I mean you two work together. I told nobody and neither did the General, but how do you think you would fare if somebody found out about this? How do you explain a close co-worker in your bed and wearing your clothes? You would both be court-martialed quicker than you could say an F-14."

"I realize that," he admitted. "But nobody can really object to me taking care of my best friend, can they?"

"Are you sure there is nobody else who would be actually better suited to that?"

"Meg, she has no parents or siblings or cousins. Hell, her only living relative who gives a damn is serving his sentence in Leavenworth. Who else is there but her friends? Bud and Harriet have two small kids a soon will have four. There is her sort of adopted little sister, but she is a teenager living with her grandparents, not an adult. Mac does not trust people easily. Making friends has always been difficult for her. I am the only choice. And to be honest, even if I wasn't, I would choose this."

"Is that really everyone?" she pressed. "Are you sure there is nobody else at all?"

He frowned. "No. Why are you so insistent on this?"

She quickly lowered her eyes to her plate. She did not want him to read her face. She felt rattled. Webb! she wanted to scream. Clayton Webb is there! Her actual boyfriend who has been going stir crazy looking for her. The man whom you are actively preventing from seeing her! What did you tell her anyway? What did you tell her to convince her Webb didn't care enough? That he is out of town? On a mission? In deep cover?

"I just think you have a lot on your plate," she said out loud instead. "Both literally and figuratively. Eat up, Commander!"

Few mouthfuls later she added: "Is there any way I can help you, Harm?"

"Actually, yes," he admitted, quickly looking around and lowering his voice. "If I give you my credit card, do you think you might find some time to... uh... do some shopping?"

"Shopping," she repeated, confused.

"Yeah. For Mac. I threw away those hospital garbs and she has been in my clothes since then. But she is better now, as I have said, and I suppose she should actually be able to wear something her own size. Plus... she... has no... undergarments. So ... yeah."

She stared at him incredulously.

"Look, Meg, I know it sounds like a weird request and normally I would have asked Harriet or Jennifer, but I don't want to bother Harriet in her state and Jen, well, let's say if she finds out how Mac really has been and is... she might not keep it to herself, God bless her heart. You, I can trust."

"OK," Meg said eventually. "But could you give me some pointers? I mean how tall is she? What does she prefer?"

"Given the weather, perhaps some comfy sweaters and sweatpants? Or some other kind of pants? I suppose you cannot really buy jeans without her trying them on first, or you could buy a bunch and she can try them later. I don't care. You can buy the whole shop if you want to. Also the already mentioned unmentionables. Just... something you know makes women comfortable. Yeah. That is the operative word here. Comfortable. I want her to be comfortable."


Later that day she was standing in the middle of the store, a bunch of T-shirts, sweaters and other clothing items in a heap in her arms. A thought came to her then. She carefully balanced the pile of clothes to reach into her purse and take out her cell phone.

"Hello? Yes, this is Meg Hartley. Listen... I think you could help me with something and help yourself in the process. Would you happen to have access to the Colonel's apartment?"