I may lose you

Alec knew that had not been enough for her, that of giving her assurance he'd make sure she was safe. He had to leave her yet again with nothing solid about discussing getting married, of which he was fairly certain Bob would never find her, in Aberdeen or if they went back to Paisley.

The week went too quickly for both of them and he had to take her back to London, going back to Aberdeen on the Sunday. Jackie had almost force-fed him with a large Sunday lunch, saying he still needed fattening up and gave him a bone-crushing hug before he said goodbye.

He left, feeling sad she was not going back with him but she promised to think carefully about it as he was about to leave. Out of habit, he'd parked the borrowed car where John used to, it was like their spot for saying goodbye.

"Your mother still seems to think I never eat," he told Rose as they were still in an embrace.

"Yeah, ya know what she's like? Alec, it's not easy for me to take the risk of going back with ya. What if you do actually get placed in Paisley or nearby and he finds out?" Rose wanted to know.

"Rose, you can't live being fearful of him. Besides, you're a lot older now, he'll know you're too clever to go back to him."

"Does he Alec? How can I ever be sure? Just come back when ya can, please? Don't leave it so long next time."

"I do try to get away Rose, honestly. Come up to Aberdeen, if you can get another week off, okay?"

Rose nodded and they kissed goodbye, Alec feeling her tears on his shoulder as she didn't want to let go. She made her way back home after seeing him drive off and her mother was waiting.

"Why the hell didn't ya go with him?" Jackie demanded to know. "Do ya know what ya doing to him Rose?"

"Do ya think it's easy Mum? It's not, trust me," Rose replied.

"Well do something about it then, you're gonna lose him ya know?" Jackie replied. "I don't know what's keepin' ya here, don't stay for me."

"Says you who told the entire estate not to talk to any men with a Scottish accent," Rose tried to change the subject.

"I did it for your protection, in case ya forgot. I tried to protect ya when we came back," Jackie reminded her. "So, what ya gonna do about it then?"

Apart from phone calls when Alec finished his duties at a decent hour, things steadily got worse, for both of them. He couldn't get enough time off at Christmas so he tried to talk Rose into getting the train to join him and they'd book a guest house for a week, Rose saying she would pay for it.

He'd asked where he was staying but the officer's wife gave him a firm 'No' when he said his fiancée wanted to visit. The officer concerned told him he was sorry about it and invited them to have Christmas dinner with them. Rose found it a bit daunting but Alec persuaded her to agree so when she arrived at Aberdeen railway station on the 23rd, Alec had managed to get a break to meet her.

"Crikey, it's strange you're meeting me dressed in your uniform," Rose smiled as he took her case.

"Yes, good thing I didn't come here in a police car," Alec agreed as he went to the first taxi in the rank.

He gave the address of the guest house and got them booked in, then he had to leave. He took the outer door key with him and Rose said she'd wait up for him. She hadn't liked the idea of leaving her mother alone but Jackie had insisted she'd go to cousin Mo's for dinner and on Boxing Day and told Rose not to make a fuss about it, it was all about her being with Alec for the holidays.

Alec was getting off duty at six on Christmas Day, those with families getting most of the day off but he'd only been able to book that time by saying Rose was coming up from London. Rose was waiting for him to collect her, the sergeant was giving him a ride and would wait for them. Once at the sergeant's house and meeting his two older children, Rose was asked what she normally did at Christmas.

"Alec and his brother used to come down," Rose replied, referring to John as no less these days, they had been like brothers for as long as she'd known them anyway.

"You must miss being there then?" the sergeant's wife asked her.

Rose didn't want to be reminded, looking across at Alec.

"I miss going down there like I used to be able to," Alec replied for her.

"So, how did the two of you meet then?" they were asked, Alec having not talked about it much.

"We met when Rose came to live up in Paisley, when we were thirteen," he told them.

He told them briefly how he and Rose had met and going to school together, then she'd had to leave.

"Mum decide to leave," Rose told them, not wanting to say why. "Alec's brother used to bring him down during school holidays but he's so far away now."

Thanking the sergeant's wife, they were given a ride back to the guest house, Alec giving her a hug when they got to their room.

"Are you feeling homesick?" Alec wanted to know.

"I miss my mum but I miss being with your family. They were the ones who made me feel at home when I lived up here. I won't ever forget that first Christmas I spent with them."

When it came for her to leave, opting not to stay for the new year celebration or 'Hogmanay ' as they called it since he had got extra duties, they were waiting for her train back to London just after seven in the morning.

"You know how much I love ya Alec," Rose was telling him. "I can't keep doin' this, saying goodbye after only a few days."

"Then come back Rose, we'll rent somewhere, I can claim an allowance for you," Alec pleaded yet again as they huddled to keep warm.

"I'd only be happy in Paisley or maybe Glasgow but I still don't know if I'll be safe."

"We'll keep you safe Rose and I'll get back there as soon as I can. Don't give up getting back there, please?"

He saw the train approaching the platform and willing Rose not to get on but as people were getting off, she turned back to him.

"Bye Alec, I love you."

"I love you too Rose, let me know when you get home," he replied, trying to steady his voice.

Rose didn't want to go out to celebrate the new year as he mother tried to drag her to the pub with their friends and relatives.

"Don't stay here and be a misery Rose," her mother was telling her as she got ready.

"I'm still tired from yesterday Mum," Rose used the excuse.

"Ya mean Alec won't be there more like," her mother replied. "Everyone will be asking where ya are."

"I'd just spoil things and besides, Alec might call if he gets the chance before he goes on duty."

"Surely he will?" Jackie asked.

Rose just hoped he would as Jackie shouted a 'ta-ra' as she went off.

Alec had got a few hours sleep and presented himself in uniform to be sent with other officers to the main areas for crowd control, something he wasn't used to and wondered why the last few weeks he'd been asked to wear his uniform. He hoped it wouldn't be much longer and that it wasn't a sign he'd remain a DC forever or that he wouldn't get an allowance for Rose if she joined him to pay for somewhere to live. That was if he could persuade her it was safe for her to return. He'd talked to his dad and John and they had both told him not to give up hope she would come back.

The first week of January though, Alec thought he was in trouble as he was called to the chief's office and someone else was there.

"This is Commissioner Lewis from regional headquarters," the chief told him. "He's looking for officers to try a new programme and it may mean you can go back to your home town."

"It involves doing training on the job as you have been doing," the commissioner told him. "You'll also be given training to become a detective sergeant and once you've passed the exam, you'll have a choice where you are sent. Your chief put your name forward, he's pleased with your progress since you've been here."

Alec couldn't believe his luck. Surely Rose would agree to coming up to join him now?

"Where will I receive this training Sir, in Paisley?" he asked hopefully.

"You'd be here for now, sorry," the chief replied. "I've been selected to provide the training programme, there are several officers also applying, most of them older than you and you'll be the youngest. Some though may get turned down so you may have some of their friends turning against you."

"I don't see much of them Sir," Alec pointed out.

"Very good then," the commissioner seemed satisfied. "Your chief will give you all the details before your training starts. I expect you'll keep quiet over it until it comes into force?"

"I think he will, won't you Alec, except for telling your fiancée?" the chief smiled.

Since he'd not had time to talk to Rose much since she'd gone home, he wondered what she'd have to say about it, it could go either way.

"What?" Rose was asking him when he dared to tell her a few days later. "You're staying up there?"

It hadn't gone as well as he hoped.

"Rose, you can come up here, can't you?" he finally asked when she'd stopped objecting to the idea. "It means an early promotion, I thought you would be happy?"

"Well I'm happy you're getting a promotion Alec but I thought ya'd complete your training in Paisley?" she asked, sounding sad.

"I know love, I wish I could but they don't have the programme running there yet, it's being trialled here, since it was the commissioner's idea to take it on. It could spread to other parts of Scotland later, when everyone sees it's being successful," he replied. "Say you're pleased about it and you'll come up, if only for a week again."

"Well I'll see when I can get a week off, Donna just got promoted to personnel officer so I might be able to twist her arm so I can come up for your birthday?" she told him, sounding to him more hopeful.

"I know it's difficult for you Rose but we did talk about you coming up here. I know it's not Paisley but it's not too bad here. I can look for a place for us to live, you can get a job here," he suggested.

Rose didn't like the idea, it wasn't the same as the plans she'd had to go back to Alec's home town. It just so happened Alec's birthday fell on Easter again but Donna had some bad news for her when she'd asked.

"Sorry Rose, I can only say Mr Graham had planned a big sale that week, we need all hands on deck," Donna told her. "No-one even knows yet so keep it quiet. He said no holidays were to be booked, it's starting on Good Friday so you'd only have the Sunday and Monday, we're opening. Can't your fiancé come down here?"

"Ya know it's difficult for him Donna," Rose replied, flopping on the chair opposite her friend.

Donna had taken her promotion seriously, having her own desk with a brass nameplate on it saying 'Miss Donna Noble'.

"Rose, we've been friends for ages, I'd help ya out if I could," Donna tried to tell her.

"I know Donna, I don't want ya gettin' into trouble over it. How about a week in May?" Rose asked hopefully.

"For your birthday?" Donna grinned.

When Rose broke the news to Alec, he tried not to sound disappointed.

"Never mind love, you tried. So, come up on your birthday then and I'll line up some places we could maybe rent and you can go look at them? I'll come and look as well, when I can."

Rose could only agree but had already caught the doubting bug that something else was keeping them apart, besides the thought Bob would still come after her, even in Aberdeen. Her mother wasn't helping either.

"Well you were the one that said Bob would maybe find ya wherever ya went," Jackie reminded her when Rose had broken the news to Alec.

"I know I did Mum. I just have this awful feeling that comes over me that I'll never be free of him," she had to admit.

"Have ya talked to Alec about it?" Jackie wondered.

"How can I tell him Mum? He doesn't think it'll happen, that Bob will have forgotten about whatever he planned by now. It was me who thought it might be until I'm twenty five, no-one else really thought it. How can I be sure it'll even stop at that?"

"Well wanting to go back to live in Paisley's not gonna help much," Jackie reminded her. "I hate the thought of ya going back there just to be trapped by him."

"Alec's gonna give up on me, I know he is," Rose almost cried.

"Well have that week with him and look for a place to live Rose, it's the only way you're gonna get that idea out of ya head," Jackie tried to cheer her up.

"It's months away Mum, Alec didn't sound happy when I told him. I never told him I think Bob's still lookin' for me though, he thinks I've finally forgotten about it."

"Ya have to tell him Rose," her mother insisted.

"If I do, I may lose him Mum."

Rose was right, it didn't go down well with him.

Alec really was disappointed when he next called, not knowing she still thought that way, after all this time.

"You have to get over it Rose, how will he know you're here?" Alec wanted to know.

"Because of what your uncle said, that Bob will have alerted the police I've run away from home and that he had the age changed."

"He will have given up Rose. He wanted you when you were a teenager, remember?"

"How do I know that Alec? I'm sorry, it's just I can't get over it, that he wanted to get me involved and I would have, if it hadn't been for you."

Alec remembered only too well how he'd saved her more than once from falling into Bob's sordid trap. He remembered how Rose could have easily given in since her mother had been taken in by Bob.

"So, what do we do then?" Alec had to ask. "It could be years before I can ask to be stationed down in London or even in the north of England. Remember what you said about accents?" he tried to lighten the mood.

It didn't work.

"I wouldn't care where it was, as long as you're this side of the border," she sighed.

"I know love but before that happens, that's what concerns me. I have no choice but to continue studying up here or go back to how things were and take the slower route to becoming a detective sergeant. Remember, I'm only a provisionally detective constable if I leave here."

Rose already knew how he'd come by his promotion since being in Aberdeen. It didn't help the situation they were in though. Alec waited for her reply but Rose couldn't say anything.

"Rose, you know I would do anything for you, if you want, I'll give all this up and come back to live in London. I'd go back to basic training down there if it made you happy," he broke the silence.

"You've worked too hard to give it all up for me," Rose reminded him. "I can't let you go back, not now."

"Rose, I don't want to lose you over this," he told her with a lump in his throat.

"I don't want to lose you either Alec but I never told ya that I thought something else, other than Bob was trying to keep us apart."

"Such as?" he wanted to know. "Rose, don't let your imagination make you doubt, please? You have to get over it and take a chance. You were here for a week, nothing happened love, doesn't that prove he's given up?"

She hadn't told him she'd been nervous all the time she'd been there. Alec had booked them in the guest house under his name but Rose had signed her name before she'd left, the landlady having thought she'd signed when she arrived. Rose had purposely neglected to offer her name on her arrival.

Ever since then, she had a dreaded feeling come over her that Bob would find out she'd been up there and he'd get to know Alec's surname.

"Rose," Alec was calling her, thinking the sergeant he was staying with would question if it was necessary to stay on talking so long.

Alec had offered to pay for the new call charges that the telephone company were offering, that of you got 59 minutes for a certain price, just as long as it didn't go over the time limit, which the sergeant had agreed to. Now Alec was watching the clock, this was the first time they'd got to fifty minutes of talking.

"Rose, I'll have to hang up and call you back, otherwise I'll have to pay full price for this call. Just hang up love and let me call you back."

Rose put the phone receiver down, wishing her mother would pay a visit to the electrical department of the store where she worked to get a new cordless phone. Alec called her back, getting a reminder from his landlady of how long he'd been out in the hallway talking to his fiancée.

"Is something wrong?" he was asked as she popped her head around the living room door.

"No, it's fine, sorry. Just some things Rose and I need to talk about," he answered as he waited for Rose to pick up the phone at the other end.

Rose was staring at it, thinking maybe she should call him back but he'd told her it was cheaper for him now. When she didn't answer after a few rings, Alec was really worried. He was going to lose her if he didn't do something drastic. Maybe he should suggest she made her way to Greta Green and they'd get married without all the fuss, with just her mother and John being there?

"Rose, I thought you weren't going to answer love. Can you get next Saturday and the following Monday off?" he asked with a hint of excitement in his voice as he thought of an answer to their problems.

"Alec, it's a long way for a weekend up there, are ya gonna get John to come down with ya?"

"No, I was going to get John to come down for you love, not to bring you here though," Alec laughed.

"Then what?" asked a confused Rose.

"To pick you and your mother up and take you somewhere. Rose, we could get married, next weekend if you will meet me somewhere they ask no questions, you know where I mean?" he asked her, hoping no-one would hear him but the sergeant's teenagers could hear a pin drop fifty yards away so he had to keep his voice low.

Rose had gone silent again so he waited for her answer, even if it took another fifty minutes, he wanted to ask her to get married next weekend and if Bob even tried to interfere, he'd arrest the man on the spot. He knew he should have done that in the first place but he needed the man to make the first move.

He couldn't have gone to where Rose used to live and accuse the man of trying to groom Rose and involve her in whatever was going on but he could charge Bob with attempted kidnapping, if he tried to get Rose returned to him. He knew he should have done it the moment he'd joined the police but was it fair to use Rose as the bait?

If he'd only known that he didn't have to worry about the man Rose had lived with for three years. With his uncle not being able to learn anything new and Rose not giving them Bob's surname, they were totally unaware the police in Paisley had changed their minds after looking carefully into what Bob had told them and of Jackie's agreement that he was to take custody if Rose ran off. The police chief had made it known to ignore what had been requested when Rose had reached the age of eighteen and Bob could no longer seek their help in finding her, were she to venture back to Scotland.

Rose had come out of her daze.

"You mean it Alec? Ya know I love ya but I signed my name, in that guest house, remember? Alec, the booking was in your name so now, Bob could find out. I can't go and live in Aberdeen with ya, I can't risk him coming to look for me."

Alec was stunned, if that was the word.

"So, what does that mean for us Rose?" he asked as his voice finally broke.