He blinked his eyes open spotting Bonnie pacing as she wiped under her eyes every so often. "Babe,"
She gasped then called out for a nurse before walking up to him. "Stefan, I was so worried," she cried holding his hand.
"Where's Damon?"
"I told them not to call him, I thought he was harming you so he shouldn't be here. Are you okay?"
"I was surprised. I was crying, he slammed the door," his heart started beating faster, "I thought it was,"
"It's okay, it's okay. Take a breath."
He breathed how he'd learned to when dealing with situations like these. Bonnie placed her hand on the side of his face caressing his cheek with her thumb. "I love you."
"I love you."
"You have to be careful, Stefan, you went into cardiac arrest, do you know what that is?"
"My heart stopped."
She nodded. "They got here just in time to help you." She held his hand. "I could've lost you. I don't ever want to lose you."
"Come here," he kisses her, running his hands down her hair. "Can you get on the bed with me?"
"I don't think so,"
"Please? I just want to lay with you, please."
Bonnie watched his eyes before looking over at the nurse. She nodded giving her the okay but made her lay on the right side to avoid his heart. Stefan moved an arm around her and moved in close inhaling her scent. The only sound was the beep monitoring his steady heart.
"Get some rest, babe."
He nodded then was shortly off to sleep.
…
Bonnie got back from the food court finding something healthy to bring back to Stefan which was surprisingly not easy. Besides your fruits, there weren't many options, but she made due. "OK, Stefan, I got—" she halted at the entrance seeing that he wasn't alone.
"Bonnie this is Damon."
She narrowed her eyes confused because she specifically told the hospital to not call him so either they didn't listen or Stefan was the one to call him.
"You did this to him, you should be arrested."
"On what grounds? You think because you're his new little play toy that you get to regulate his mind?"
"Damon, honestly what the hell is wrong with you? How can you be so cruel to your brother who you know needs help and needs to be stable."
"Don't talk about his needs like you know everything about him."
"I bet I know more about him than you. You know why? Because I actually see Stefan as a person and not as someone who needs to be watched over. He's fine on his own if you'd let him live like an actual person."
"You call this fine?"
"Don't you dare use this as an excuse, you caused this. You put his heart at risk, you put him in this bed. I called the police, I was there for him."
"And thank you, but you're not going to be around anymore."
She shook her head, "That's not your decision to make. That's a discussion between only Stefan and me."
"I want to be with Bonnie, Damon."
"Shut up, Stefan."
"How about you start showing your brother some respect, you may be older but he isn't five years old. You're not wanted here anymore."
"I wouldn't care if I was. He's my brother, I'm responsible for him. You can't even begin to understand the shit we've been through."
"You're right. I can't relate but maybe that's what he needs. Someone who won't keep bringing up the past, a new start."
"And let me guess you're the only one that can do that for him."
"No. I love Stefan and I want what's best for him and if him seeing me puts him in another position like this then I don't want to see him at all."
"Babe—"
"Treat him better, Damon. Let him live like a normal twenty-one year old and you'll never see me again. I swear."
"Bonnie, don't do this to me. Please don't do this to me, please."
"I love you, Stefan."
"Bonnie," he frowned, seeing her walk away and cried once she was actually gone.
"You see, Stefan, she doesn't care. Now you're heartbroken this is exactly what I was worried about."
"Stop talking to me."
"She found an out and she took it."
"I said stop fucking talking to me!"
A nurse ran in shortly and asked Damon to give him some space for a while. Stefan leaned back meeting his head with his pillow.
"I can't go on without you."
"Don't say that, please don't say that."
"I miss you so much," he sniffed in. "What did- did I scare you away?"
"No, I promise you didn't. I want you healthy, I don't ever want to see you like that again and the only reason you were there was because of me. I scared me away."
"Can I just see you one more time? Please,"
"At school?"
"No, right now."
"I can't right now, I have a study date with Caroline."
"Well, when then?"
"Tomorrow. I'll come early, okay, then we can spend the day together in your room."
"Okay,"
"I'll see you tomorrow,"
She waited for him to hang out first and once he did, she fell back on her bed. She really wished that she had his shirt to hug and squeeze but she didn't. She closed her eyes and turned to the side clinging to her pillow.
…
Bonnie ran her fingers through her hair after filling Caroline in on her predicament. It stressed her out the more she talked about it and started to regret her decision in breaking up with him though she knew it was for his own good.
"Dang, Bonnie."
"Please don't give me the 'I told you so' speech,"
Her mouth dropped, "I wasn't. I'm just- what are you going to do?"
She shrugged. "I want to be there for him. I love him, Caroline and he loves me and it feels horribly wrong to abandon him like this. You should've seen him, it honestly broke my heart."
"But you're seeing him tomorrow so you're not abandoning him. You're giving him time to heal and grow from this. I hate to agree with the evil big brother, but maybe he was right. Maybe he just wasn't ready for a relationship."
Bonnie sighed knowing that she was right.
Stefan wiped his eyes as his phone rang and answered it immediately seeing who was calling. "Hello?"
"Open your window."
His eyes narrowed but he got up from his bed and smiled seeing her standing right outside. He hung up the phone and unlocked his window to welcome her inside. "I'm glad you're here."
"I missed you, I couldn't wait. I bought my pillowcase."
His face brightened as she pulled it out from her bag. He took it and covered his pillow with it then pulled her down on his bed to lay beside him.
"I love you so much."
"I love you more."
He grabbed her close, closing his eyes. She watched him until he was asleep. Bonnie brushed his hair back some and he snuggled into her making her smile and hold him just as close before closing her eyes.
When she woke up, Stefan was already awake gazing at her face. She moved in to kiss him once but he pulled her in longer. "Are we still broken up?"
"I don't want to be but at the same time it might be what's best for now."
"Why?"
"Because I got you in trouble. It was partly my fault that you were in the hospital."
"No. It wasn't your fault, you keep me calm and make me feel normal."
"But Damon yelled at you because of me. I can't put you through that again, your heart can't take it and I can't take it. I was so worried, baby." A tear fell from her eye. "When you answered the phone I thought you were dying, I felt so helpless. I'm so sorry,"
He shushed her and pulled her into his chest in comfort. "Don't apologize. I love you, don't be sad," he kissed her head rubbing his hand up and down her back.
She calmed her tears and they just held each other in silence. She held him close taking in his scent. "I want to shower with you."
He smiled. "Damon's almost gone, but I promise we will."
She nodded then held him tighter as Damon knocked on his door. "Stefan, I'm leaving."
"OK."
"Can you open the door?"
"I'm tired."
"Stefan, I'm sorry, alright? I know you really liked Bonnie and whatever but- I'll make it up to you, I promise."
Bonnie looked up at him to watch his face but it didn't display any particular emotion. When he heard the door close, he looked down at her. "Will he see your car?"
"No,"
He nodded then kissed her before getting up. She wanted to comment but decided against it. He took her hand hearing Damon's car pull off and she smiled as he stripped her going into the bathroom. She helped him remove his shirt and they pushed their pants down themselves before standing straight, looking at one another. Stefan turns on the shower then pulls her into his body, meeting their lips. Her fingers race through his hair and he holds her closer, squeezing her ass before hoisting her up and into the shower. He stands them underneath the showerhead with their lips still connected.
Bonnie pulled away to breathe and he smiled, kissing along her neck. She reaches for his loofah and body wash, saturating the loofah with it. She washes both of them as the soap washes away down the drain.
…
Stefan smiled over at her as she drove them over her place. He placed his hand on her thigh making her smile.
"What time does your brother get back from work?"
"Around four. He usually texts me if he'll be a little late."
Bonnie nodded then pulled into her driveway. They got out then held hands walking to the door. Stefan looked around smiling, feeling like he's gotten closer to her just by being in her personal space for only a few seconds. He walked up to the pictures she had in the mantle and smiled seeing her with whom he can only assume to be her grandmother and another with her parents and one when she was in elementary school.
"You were so cute,"
Bonnie chuckled walking up to him. "Is it bad to agree with you?"
He smiled turning to her then kissed her letting that be his answer before placing the picture back where it was. She grabbed his hand giving him a quick tour of the place and ended it in her bedroom.
"I wasn't expecting it to be pink,"
"It helps calm me down when I spend hours in here studying." She pulled on his arm leading him to her bed.
She laid on her back and smiled up at him as he hovered above her and kissed her lips. "I love you."
"I love you too."
He watched her eyes before kissing her again then felt himself roll on his back with her now on top of him.
"Wait, wait," he pulled away.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't-" He sighed. "I don't want to do this unless we're together. I want to be your boyfriend again and if you're unsure about it, that's ok but I don't want to have sex unless you're mine again. I love you. And I only want to love you, I swear, but not like this."
"I want to be with you, but I'm scared, Stefan. You were in the hospital because of me."
"Not because of you." He shook his head. "Because of Damon."
"It's practically the same thing. If I wasn't in the picture, you two wouldn't have had a fight and he would've slammed the door. It's all because of me."
"Or it's all because of Damon. I want to be with you and if that means leaving my brother then I will. I'm perfectly fine on my own as long as you're with me."
"You mean it?"
"I do,"
Bonnie looked into his eyes. "Okay. We can move in here and just be together you and me."
"Promise me,"
"I promise. But not right now, we finish out the semester and during that time we'll move some things in and out and decorate this place the way we want. This will be our home."
"This will be our home."
She smiled widely then giggled as he growled kissing her neck, turning her to her back again.
…
He felt empty without her soul present as he sat at the kitchen table not so much listening to Damon talk. He was going to tell him that he's going to get a job. He wanted to help Bonnie with any finances that they would come across so the first place that hires him is where he will be. He opened his mouth but paused. If he told Damon that he was getting a job once he leaves he could find him and threaten him and possibly get him fired. He decided to keep it quiet for now.
"Have you talked to Bonnie lately?"
Stefan looked at him and wondered if he should tell him the truth or not. "I have actually," he decided to because he wanted him to know that Bonnie isn't like Sandra.
"Are you still seeing her?"
"I don't know. I love her, Damon."
He sighed. "Stefan—"
"Listen to me, I love her. I want to be with her, I don't get why you can't let me go a little bit. It's not like I won't see you at all, I'm not going anywhere. Bonnie gets me, she understands me. I've opened up to her more than I have anyone and she still loves me."
"I'm just—"
"I don't need your protection anymore, Damon. I'm going to get a job so that one day I'll be able to provide for myself and you can get a wife and have babies or do whatever you want to do without having to worry so much about me. I would love your blessing on this but it's not a dealbreaker."
Damon looked at him starting to see a side he hasn't before. For the first time, he wasn't that paranoid little boy that he's been through his eyes all these years, he was a Stefan that he hasn't met yet but knew was in him all along. "Okay. You can work at the shop with me,"
"No, it can't be with you. I'll find something on my own."
"Okay,"
Stefan was shocked but didn't let it show. He nodded then got up to go into his room. He pulled out his phone deciding to call Bonnie. "Hey, it's me,"
"Hey, babe,"
"I talked to Damon about getting a job and I really stood up to him about you and about us and I feel like he's starting to respect me now. "
"That's great, babe. Did you tell him about the house?"
"No, not yet. I will though,"
"Don't rush it, I mean we have time but I was just wondering."
"Are you okay, you sound sad,"
"I'm fine I've just had a long day, I'm a little tired."
"Oh. Well, I'll stop talking so you can sleep."
She chuckled. "I love you, I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Okay. I love you too."
…
He smiled opening the doors to the school as she kissed along his neck with her legs around his waist. "Kiss meeee,"
He looked down looking into her eyes before kissing her, sliding his tongue in her mouth. "I love you."
"I love you more."
She returned her feet to the ground and he grabbed her hand weaving his fingers between hers. "Can we skip today?"
"What?"
"Can we skip class? I just want to be with you,"
"I- I don't know, babe, we have a test next week and I don't want to miss anything."
She frowned. "Okay,"
"I'll make it up to you, I promise." He kissed her as the elevator doors opened and they stepped inside heading to the second floor.
"Baby," she tugged on his arm pulling him into the women's bathroom.
"What are you doing?"
"Don't worry, no one really shows up at school until twenty minutes." She moves in to kiss her but he pulls back.
"Are you drunk or something?"
"No, come on," she pulled him into a stall.
"Stop, I'm leaving, this isn't a good idea."
"Don't you find me sexy?"
"Of course I do but-"
"Then fuck me."
"Bon—" he stopped hearing the door open.
Someone had come in. His heart started racing. What if they got caught? What if they get expelled, he doesn't even want to think about what Damon would do to him. He'd be actually dead this time. His life would be completely over if he makes so much a peep and that can't happen whatsoever. He gasped being startled by the toilet flush then that's when he noticed her worried eyes on him. His heart was calming but started pounding again hearing someone else come in, then another. He covered his ears and the voice of an angry Damon overthrew the power of her hug.
"Let's go," he faintly heard her. He blinked coming seeing her reach for the lock on the door then pushed her aside to open it himself.
"Ow," she painfully winced as her back forcefully met the sidewall of the stall.
She grabbed her shoulder then grabbed her bag walking out. She hoped he didn't leave but by how much he protested when she asked him to she knew he wouldn't so she headed to class relieved to see him and even more that he was the only one inside.
"Stefan I'm sorry,"
"Please leave me alone. I need some air, some space just leave. Please."
She slowly nodded before walking out. She decided to get a snack at the vending machine and wait until class is about to start head back.
"Hey, Bon,"
She put on a smile seeing Caroline. "Hey, what's up?"
She frowned. "What's wrong with your shoulder?"
"Oh I just ran into a wall with it and it hurts," she chuckled hoping to make it not a big deal. "I'll just ice it when I get back,"
She nodded. "So things with Stefan are good?"
"I don't know, he had this episode and he was super paranoid so I don't know where I stand when it comes to those times, you know. We're all good and in love when he's quote-unquote normal but when he has episodes and attacks it's like he wants nothing to do with me."
"Maybe he just doesn't want for you to see him in that way."
"Yeah, and I get that but I hope it changes."
She nods then hugs her. "We should get to class,"
They pulled away and walked together. She frowned seeing someone else seated next to him so she sat next to Caroline.
…
Bonnie waited for him outside the building door then remembered that he doesn't like surprises so she stood where she knew he would see her. She rushed up to him and ignoring her he kept walking. "Stefan please," she jogged until she got in front of him and moved her hands to the sides of his face relieved when he stopped walking. "I'm sorry, I'm- I just really miss you and the way that you hold me and touch me." His nostrils flared moving his arms around her. "I got a little carried away and I'm sorry. I honestly thought no one would be there, I swear."
"I know. It's not your fault, it's my head. With everything going on I keep forgetting to take my pills."
"You don't need your pills, Stefan, because we have each other." She stood in her toes kissing him.
He kissed her back running his hands up her ass before hugging her close. "Come over tonight," he kissed her cheek. "Sleep with me,"
She smiled. "Okay,"
"I love you, I have to go,"
"Okay, I love you too," she kissed him, then hugged him close.
He pulled away and kissed her once more before heading to the car. When he got in he saw his brother smiling some and he narrowed his eyes at him. "What are you smiling about?"
"Nothing, I'm just...proud."
"Of?"
"I saw that. You and Bonnie. Her chasing after you, you ignoring her until she throws herself at you. Nice, brother." He started the car.
Stefan smiled slightly and looked out his window.
