TRIGGER WARNING - Strong occurrences of abuse. Mentions of abuse, suicidal thoughts and self harm. Please read with caution.


i do not fear death.

i had been dead for billions of years before i was born,

and i have not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.


Maka's eyes widened before they narrowed into slits, then lost all their emotion. Only then did she see Soul stiffen in the corner of her eye.

"Mama. Papa." She murmured, her voice barely a whisper.

The moment that Maka said 'Papa', she felt Soul jolt. She looked to his face to see his eyes hard on her Papa. It was obvious he was trying to control his expression. Maka turned to see her Papa's face, which was not happy.

"This your friend?" He asked, stepping into the room. His jaw was taut, and Maka felt her throat dry up as she nodded.

"Yes," Maka managed. Papa nodded slowly and smiled. It looked wrong.

"Wanna give us some space, kid?"

Maka felt Soul rumble and she pressed a palm to his shoulder. She tried to ignore her father's intense gaze as she nodded.

"It's fine. You can go."

"You'll be alright?" He asked, his voice hard. Fear laced through her – Papa wouldn't like that he had to ask that.

"Of course," She smiled. It was so fake that she didn't know why she bothered. Soul watched her for a moment longer before forcing himself to stand. He squeezed her hand and walked around her parent's but not without sharing a look with Papa.

Papa stared blankly at the door as Soul closed it behind him. He cleared his throat and turned back towards Maka.

"You two seem close," he said nicely, but the blonde knew him well enough to know she was in trouble.

"Yeah. Yeah, he's great."

"He didn't seem to like me very much."

Maka said nothing. Papa cast an annoyed look at Mama, and Maka was scared he was going to ask her to leave for a second so he could do what he really wanted to do.

"We heard about your little… Outburst, this morning," Papa went on as he made his way over to the bed. Maka shook her head as he drew closer, her eyes closing. He faltered to a stop about a foot away from the bed. She heard her Mama swallowed thickly and step forwards to stand beside her husband and look at her.

"Yes," Mama managed. "Your doctors said that maybe if you told us about it, it would help - So, do you want to – "

"Help?" Maka croaked, suddenly brave. "You don't get it, do you?"

Papa clenched his fists in warning – Maka ignored it.

"This isn't just a little outburst." The small blonde narrowed her eyes as she spat the words. "This isn't some little phase I'm going through. No, listen to me: I'm sick. There's something – multiple things – very wrong with me."

She shook her head at her Papa and glared at him.

"Why is it so hard for you to accept that?"

Mama recoiled slightly, but Papa's eyes only narrowed in annoyance.

"Because you have no reason to be," he growled and Maka nearly laughed. Now, this was the Spirit Albarn she was used to. "You're just being overly dramatic. Acting out for attention. What did we do wrong to cause you to suddenly have all these – these - conditions? Seems a little too sudden to me. No, I think you-"

And she snapped.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!"

She leapt up from the bed, her eyes burning with outrage as she stood chest to chest with her Papa. She saw surprise in his eyes at first, but then a flood of anger.

"Sudden? How the fuck is this sudden? I have been absolutely miserable my entire life because of you." Maka sneered the word as she stabbed a finger to his chest. Her lips curled down in outrage, but Maka wasn't done.

"Not Mama, not school, you. Because, if it wasn't for you, Mama wouldn't be unhappy, school wouldn't suck and I wouldn't be fucking crazy, due to my so-called Papa being a pathetic, no good, raging alcoholic, whore – "

Maka's face exploded in agony.

Her ears ringed and her head snapped to the side as the back of her Papa's hand hit her cheek, whipping her face the other way. She heard her Mama's gasp before anything else but couldn't really think about it since Papa's fist connected with the other side of her face – He threw all his full grown-man's strength into the blow and the momentum of it threw the small blonde onto the bed. Then it stopped.

Maka didn't look up when she heard the door slam open and Papa was pulled from the room, along with Mama's hysterical apologies and outrage. She didn't want to look up. She didn't want to see his face, his expression. She slowly brought a hand up to her cheek. It ached familiarly and blood trickled into her hand.

She suddenly felt hands on her shoulders and lifted her head to see Miss Marie looking at her with eyes full of pain and… guilt. Maka could see her lips moving she but couldn't make out the words. That was the last thing Maka saw before everything went black for the second time that day.


Maka woke up in a different room, but she still seemed to be in the hospital wing. She frowned and sat up slowly, rubbing the back of her head before recollection dawned on her. She sighed heavily, lifting her hand back up to her cheek. It felt swollen and his stupid ring had obviously cut her face, but she couldn't see it. Her lip and nose felt wrong, they had obviously burst. Her throat felt thick and tight. She coughed a few times before swinging her legs over the side of the bed and sat up.

The blonde was about to stand when she heard a knock on the door. Horror swelled in her chest, but she chased it away. He wasn't here, they wouldn't have let him find her again. Her eyes were trained on the door when she told the person to come in. The blonde's entire body relaxed when she saw Soul, so much that her body drooped. His eyes on her face made her feel naked – Judging from his expression she must have looked worse than what she thought.

Soul slowly approached the bed to sit in the chair beside it, his eyes never leaving her face. Slowly, his hand drew up to trace where Papa hit her with eyes full of regret.

"I – " His voice was low and rumbling. He cleared his throat. "I shouldn't have left."

Maka shook her head.

"No, I'm glad you left otherwise it wouldn't have happened."

Soul frowned in confusion.

"I told him." She whispered, almost not believing it herself. Soul still looked confused, so she went on.

"How I felt all this time - I really told him. I've never shouted at him before and it felt so good to since everything that's wrong with my life spirals from him. My Mama would probably be amazing if it wasn't for him. School wouldn't have sucked if he wasn't the stupid vice principal. The hit was just – necessary. And nothing I'm unused to."

Maka shrugged and Soul tensed.

"He - He did that a lot?"

"… We don't have to – "

"This bad? Was it like this, all the time?"

The blonde hesitated. She didn't know if she should burden him with the truth, but she couldn't lie again.

"No," she said, and Soul relaxed. Maka cringed before adding: "It was worse."

She felt him stiffen and couldn't bring herself to look at him. She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head as his hands grasped her upper arms comfortingly.

"Did – " the tone of his voice made her feel sick. "Maka, did he – Did he ever – "

"Don't." Maka shuddered violently and pushed him away so she could stand. Soul watched her from the chair, his eyes wide. "You can't just – "

"Okay," Soul lifted his hands in surrender. "I won't. I'm sorry."

Soul stayed quiet and it was a long moment before he spoke again.

"The staff are going crazy. Marie is having a fuckin' mental breakdown she feels that bad about letting them in. Not only was it evident that most of your problems are due to your life at home but now he's showing signs of abuse…" he shook his head again, his eyes glazed over.

"They won't let you go back to him. Never."

Maka shrugged from her position by the door.

"I don't really care where I end up if it's as far away from that man as possible."

It was quiet for another long moment before Soul spoke again.

"You – You know you're gonna have to talk about it, right?" He said quietly, his low voice impossibly seeming lower. "They're gonna try and make you dig it all up – Relive it."

"I know," She whispered, and her chest burned.

Soul was quiet again till she felt his arm wrap around her shoulders and pull her to him. She hadn't even heard him get up.

"I've got you," he muttered, and she crumbled. His arm tightened. "I've got you."