A\N: I want to apologize for not posting regularly, but I know it's going to continue like this! *hides* I'm unfortunately dealing with so much in my personal life, plus with work picking up and starting a new job things have been crazy difficult. But I keep returning to the story because the plot has been swirling around in my brain and I just keep jotting down parts of scenes/plotlines I want to write! And the difficulty of resisting starting a new story until this one is done (I have like 4 ideas!) is one of the main reasons I'm trucking so hard to finish it. That, and hopefully the satisfaction of all you readers who want to know what is going to happen! I'm happy to report that we're finally getting into the thick plot chapters! I've been waiting for this for a VERY long time! I hope you enjoy! Please make sure to leave a review . . . I'll even accept ones that are angry at me for going weeks without posting.
Trigger warning: discussion of SA/trauma, fear of medicine/needles, discussion of death
Chapter 17 – Theories (EPOV)
The bathroom door opens slowly as Bella steps into my room, her tangled hair dripping with the remnants of her shower. An earlier dream left her weary enough that she insisted on a warm bath. Esme had come up, offering help but Bella vehemently refused.
She offers me a hesitant smile as I wrap my arms around her, laying a kiss on her forehead. "How are you feeling?" She shivers lightly beneath my touch.
"I'm fine."
"You're a terrible liar, love." I mutter.
She gulps. "My head hurts a bit. It's fine."
"Thank you, Bella." I murmur. She sighs quietly against me, closing her eyes. She was exhausted still.
"You went hunting?" Her fingers trail across my chest in the most intimate way, feeling my muscles beneath my shirt. I force myself to be still, not wanting to her to stop.
"A lion and a few deer." If Bella notices the strangled way I spit out my words, she doesn't comment on it. Her slow, absently touch was unbelievable.
"I missed you last night. . . And yesterday when I was with Rosalie." She mumbles, fingers moving towards my lower back as she pressures more of her body against me. My dead heart swells at her trust in me. The words eased from her evenly, but I knew they took courage to say.
"I'm here now." I murmur, my lips pressing against her head. Her wet hair perfumes my senses. The same strawberry shampoo from her home. Alice placed an order of her favorite soaps and products, stacking them all in my bathroom for Bella. I had thought Alice was being ridiculous – Bella would not care about soap – but now I appreciate the gesture.
"What's on the agenda for today?" Bella wonders quietly.
"Whatever we want." My fingers tug on the wet strands of her hair, brushing the smaller tangles free. "Sit with me?"
Bella nods as I move us, settling on the floor against the foot of the bed. Bella cautiously slips into my lap, nestling her head in the crook of my neck. She pulls her hair over her shoulder, and I can't help but breathe more deeply, allowing the scent of her shampoo intoxicate me.
"The trees are so pretty in the fog." Bella muses, her eyes soaking in the view through the floor to ceiling windows. "All the dull colors. . ."
"You appreciate the greenery." I chuckle quietly.
Bella smiles shyly. "It took time. . . I like the rain now too."
"It's certainly ironic, isn't it?" I'm distracted, drawing closer around her with each word. She smiles, turning her face towards me. She's taken aback by her close I am, her eyes slipping to the distance between us.
"Not really." She breathes, and then she is closing the distance in one swift move. Her initial bravery is lost, though, as her lips land on mine. She becomes hesitant, second-guessing herself. But her body is pressed against mine, her fingers grasping at my shirt.
I should be careful. But I'm not because I'm weak. I'm so weak I press against her with urgency, with the weight of weeks of lost kisses and touches, with the weight of missing her and me and us.
I pause at her pulse, letting it throb beneath my lips. My mouth fills with venom, somehow my throat burning despite my hunt a few hours ago. Desire burns hotter than my thirst.
I'm acutely aware of Bella's rapid breaths, her wet hair pressed against my chest, her nails biting into my thighs, her body tense against mine. Her heart rate is elevated, and her breaths are short pants, but not from panic. She's enjoying this just the same as I am. The thought fills me with euphoria.
"Is this okay?" I whisper, planting a kiss at the corner of Bella's mouth. She makes a sound, something I want to interpret as pleasure, but I know I can't assume. "Bella, tell me."
"Yes."
My fingers roam her back, twisting in her damp hair. Her spine curves toward my palms, shivering. Familiar lips mold against mine, and my body yearns for them as I break away to let her breathe. I move toward her jaw, not wasting a second, and she tips her head to give me more access. We're flush against each other – taut muscles, solid curves, admonishing warmth.
When I press my lips to Bella's throat again, she cringes, and I freeze.
"I'm sorry." I murmur, as she pulls away. "I'm so sorry."
Bella shakes her head, her trembling hands receding to her lap. "No, I –"
I fill the silence when Bella doesn't. "We took it too far."
She doesn't say anything, and I can feel the guilt sliding through my veins. I can feel the distance coming between us again, despite our physical closeness. I can feel her closing off, retreating into her mind. Her expression triggers my memories of those first few weeks – her blank expression, far away eyes, thoughts I can't hear that she was drowning in.
She can't go back into her head.
"Should we go downstairs? You barely ate dinner last night."
Bella nods gently, silent pushing herself away from me. She leads the way, looking back to check that I'm following her, as we slip down the steps and into the main room. It's empty, with the exception of Emmett and Jasper who are playing their own version of chess with six boards spread across the table. The TV is playing lightly in the back on a new channel discussing the situation in Seattle.
It's getting worse, Edward. I'm not sure why they haven't moved on yet. They are being very obvious. Jasper's aiming his thoughts at me, nodding toward the TV. He's right. The headline on the channel is showing the increasing anxiety over the situation.
"There's nothing we can do right now." I murmur, so quiet the words slip past Bella without her noticing.
We need to consider going there and stopping them. I'm surprised they aren't aware of us, or the mutts.
Bella's ignorant of our short exchange as she walks towards the kitchen and I'm so shocked by her decision to eat that I do little to respond to Jasper as I follow her.
"What would you like to eat?" I ask her, trying to hide my surprise. She shrugs sheepishly, blushing.
"Just thirsty. I want some tea." She admits quietly, reaching for the tea pot. I beat her to it, reaching for it faster than she can. She stares for a moment at the empty counter before realizing that I have the pot in my hand. "I can do it."
"Don't deny me the pleasure, Bella." I say, filling the pot with water and putting it on the stove. "I know you're still tired."
"Thanks." She mumbles, her cheeks still pink.
"Go sit with them before you collapse."
Bella bites her lip, nodding to me as stumbles quietly from the kitchen.
The tea kettle is boiling within just a few moments and not long after, I'm walking Bella's steaming cup towards her. She happily accepts it, breathing in the scented steam coming from the shallow ceramic.
"That still smells repulsive." Emmett voices, nodding toward Bella's cup. "Absolutely disgusting."
"Thanks Emmett." Bella mumbles in response. Bella is quiet as she continues watching Jasper and Emmett play. Jasper is less intrigued by the game as he is by the news, which Rosalie eventually joins to watch as well.
It surprises me how at ease Bella is around Rosalie now. I'm also surprised at how grateful I am that Rosalie's occasional glares have morphed into looks of assurance for Bella.
"Is that about Seattle?" Bella asks me, though her gaze is averted. Jasper's mind instantly tells me she's embarrassed, and I realize then I should have insisted we talk before coming downstairs. I should have assured her she didn't have to be embarrassed or ashamed or frightened, that we would move at her pace, that I loved her. Regret boils inside of me.
"Yes." Jasper's voice is curt.
"The killings are getting worse." Rosalie adds, her eyes flashing between me and Bella. She should know, Edward. "We might have to intervene soon."
"That would mean a bloodbath." Jasper sighs. "We can't afford to be occupied with this right now."
Rosalie shoots him a glare.
"You know what he means, Rose." I mutter under my breath. "A fight like this? The risk is too great for us. What if the Volturi gets involved?
"Yes, I know. Bella is still human. Half the guard wants to suck her dry, Aro wants her turned, and he wants you and Alice in his guard." Rosalie snaps back.
"Exactly, we are already on the hunt from someone else." Jasper insists. "We don't have the bandwidth for this now."
"Regardless, don't make her feel like a burden." Rosalie hisses, just as quietly. My gaze slips from Rosalie. Her words, perfectly applicable to me, feel like a knife twisting in my gut.
"How many are there?" Bella's voice is weak, and I can hear the slopping of her tea as her hands tremble.
"I can't be sure. Enough to wreak havoc." Jasper tells her firmly. His eyes flash between her and the TV. "If we go, we'll have to go blind." We've made up our decision to go half a dozen times now. Alice should have seen something. Anything.
At the discussion of Seattle, Carlisle and Alice finally appear downstairs, followed quickly by Esme.
"Blind?" Bella's eyes are wide as she looks at Jasper. "Why?"
Alice sighs, slipping to sit between me and Bella. She wraps her arms about Bella's trembling form, kissing her cheek. "Glimpses, as I told you. I'm not seeing what I should."
Carlisle sighs. "They're discussing everything at this point. They've been debating serial killers and motives for days. . . There's clearly no pattern, which is discouraging them."
Emmett stands up, grinning. "Let's go now! I'm bored."
Rosalie hisses at Emmett. Moron.
"He's right, Rosalie." Jasper says, shaking his head. "We have to go sometime."
"Jasper, we've never involved ourselves in this kind of thing before. It's not our business. We aren't the Volturi." Carlisle was shaking his head.
"We can't have them coming here." Jasper disagrees. His eyes flash to Bella at the same time that mine do. She's wrapped securely in Alice's arms, watching us discuss, the teacup still in her hand.
"We can't have this go on any further, either. The longer this lasts, the more weight is put on us and the Volturi." Alice insists. "Our attention is divided, Carlisle. My attention is."
"We don't know that this is the reason your visions are slipping." Rosalie shakes his head at Alice. "I wouldn't assume your failures are because of Seattle."
Alice curls her lip back. "I'm sure you wouldn't suggest that at all, Rosalie."
"Stop it, Alice." Bella mumbles.
"Stay out of this, Bella." Alice snaps at her friend and I can see Bella recoil from Alice's harsh tone. A small hiss escapes my own throat, but Alice ignores me.
"Enough." Esme finally says, her eyes landing on each one of us in turn. None of us miss the way Bella balks at Esme's tone. "We don't need any of this."
"Alice's visions aren't exactly a science, Rose." Carlisle says. "We don't always understand the extent of what she sees, and we've grown overly dependent on them."
In my focus on Rosalie and Alice's disagreement, and, by association, Bella's involvement, I had forgotten about Jasper. He had been pacing in the back of the room, lost in his own thoughts about his time before joining our family. His thought slips through the noise around me, pulling his mind to my focus.
"Oh!" I breathe. Jasper looks up at me, grimacing. "I didn't think of that!"
"It makes sense." Jasper mutters under his breath, shrugging. "I don't understand it, though."
"What?" Rosalie hisses.
"What is it?" Esme asks, her voice much gentler than Rosalie's. I could hear the annoyed thoughts of my family members around us, but they hardly mattered. My mind was spinning, swarmed with my own thoughts and Jasper's invading ones.
"You're right! This changes . . . everything." I mumble.
"I don't understand the purpose of this, Edward." Jasper shakes his head again. "It doesn't make much sense, does it?"
"An army." I breathe, glancing at each member of my family. My eyes land on Carlisle last, who's thought turn from confused to understanding.
"I thought I must be interpreting the signs incorrectly – after all, there is no motive. There is no reason to create an army in Seattle. . . No history or vendetta." Jasper is rambling in his thoughts as he continues to pace. "There's no history at all. It makes hardly any sense from a conquest standpoint. No coven has claimed Seattle, necessarily. Nomads pass through, but there's no one to fight for it. No one to defend it from."
"What?" Bella's voice is just a whisper of confusion in a room of understanding. "I don't understand."
Jasper looks to Bella, and then to me. "Have you told her nothing, Edward?"
My jaw locks with his accusation. "There was little point, Jasper." I snap at him.
Jasper's story was the most violent of ours. There was never a good time to discuss that with Bella, and certainly not now. He shrugs slowly at my glare, trying to understand the frustration I was projecting at him.
"Hmm. . ." He hums quietly, turning back to Bella. "My apologies, Bella. I hadn't realized you didn't know my story. I suppose I'll tell you. . ."
"Not now." Carlisle stands up quietly, looking at Bella. His story will stress her. . . She needs to be calm right now. She already has a headache. He spies the cup in her hand, watching the tea tremble as her hands do. The trembling is worse today.
She's terrified. Alice pries the mug out of Bella's hand, slowly setting it on the table so the hot tea doesn't spill on her.
"Jasper." I mutter, nodding toward Bella. Jasper grimaces, urging Bella in his own way to settle down by pushing the panic and fear from her mind.
"There's an army of newborn vampires in Seattle, Bella." Jasper explains gently. His voice is calm, soothing, and I can see the more positive impact it's having on her. "It must be fewer than twenty, I'd guess. They are completely untrained. That much is clear from their lack of discipline and desire to stay hidden. Whoever made them set them loose."
Bella shudders in Alice's arms. "Why?"
Jasper grimaces with a shrug. "I can't say. There's no motive. As I said, Seattle is unclaimed territory."
For now. Someone was clearly trying to lay claim to the region, though there are little reason why. Whoever was interested in Seattle had to have known we were here, even if we hadn't necessarily claimed the area as our own. If they had dug deeper, they might have also figured out about the mutts. Surely there were easier places to stake a claim to without risk of retaliation from residing covens.
"If this is true, the Volturi won't wait to step in." Carlisle says. "They shut these wars down before." If they had nothing to gain from them first. . .
Carlisle thought is muted, almost shy in his mind. His hesitation to be disloyal to the Volturi ran deep.
"It's a surprise they let it go on this long at all." Esme says. "They're all about being inconspicuous."
"They will step in soon. If we want to avoid their involvement with us, we will have to destroy the newborns ourselves. We've already discussed going to Seattle to do that, but now we know we have to." Jasper's face is hard as he speaks, and his thoughts dark as he remembers his time with Maria.
It made almost no sense. There was no motive. There was no reason for the vampires to continue terrorizing Seattle once the media caught on.
"How are you doing, Bella?" Esme asks tenderly.
"I'm fine." Her voice was weak as she speaks. Even I could see the paleness of her skin and the trembling in her breaths.
I shake my head, bothered by Bella's fear. She had nothing to worry about, and yet she was worrying anyway. We were perfectly safe. Nothing would happen to us. . .
"Jasper." My voice is sharp as I speak, my eyes flying from Bella's shaking form to his. "Does it occur to anyone else that the only possible threat in the area that would call for the creation of an army is . . ." I hesitate to get the word out, my eyes flashing to Bella again as I watch her composure break. "us."
Jasper narrows his eyes at me, realizing that I'm on to something. Carlisle shakes his head, debating the possibility of my words in his head.
"The Denali's are also near, Edward." Esme responds slowly. Her voice quiet under the density of the room.
"The newborns aren't near Anchorage." Alice murmurs bitterly. "They're staying in Seattle."
"I think we have to consider that we are the targets." I say again. My eyes flash to Bella. Her eyes are wide with fear as she stares at me.
"They're not coming after us." Alice insists. I would have seen that, Edward. You have me watching so much, I would know if there was a threat on us.
"You don't know that." I say, trying to keep my voice soft as I talk. Alice sinks into the couch, put down by her visions.
"Unless they don't know." Bella mumbles.
"What was that?" Carlisle wonders. He moves slowly as he approaches Bella. Everyone was walking on eggshells – not just with Bella, with each other.
"They don't know that they are. . . Not yet." Bella whispers to Carlisle. "Glimpses. That's what Alice said she was seeing. They aren't making decisions."
"Oh!" Jasper breathes. "Moving courses so quickly that you get flashes, Alice. Nothing concrete. . . No decisions are being made. If it's a young vampire making this army, that would make sense."
Carlisle hums in disagreement. "To not have a plan prepared seems irresponsible."
"They're newborns." Emmett scoffs. "They can't plan right now."
"Was James able to figure out your visions?" Bella asks meekly. "In those few days. He might have told Victoria."
"Somewhat." Alice responds quietly, thinking. "Part of it, I think, was your indecision, then. I'm not so sure he knew how powerful I was, Bella."
Bella shivers, her eyes closing. "Victoria is still out there. . ."
Alice shakes her head. "I'm not so sure it's Victoria either."
"It's knowledge. Someone knows Alice can't see unless a decision is made. Someone is hiding from us, playing with her visions."
"Indecision." Carlisle mutters under his breath, trying to understand.
"Who would know how to do that?" Alice whispers. Aro. Aro would know. . . Her eyes are cold as ice as we lock gaze.
"Aro knows you as well as you know yourself." I whisper coldly. "He read our thoughts."
"But . . ." Alice hesitates, unsure now of her own visions. "I would see if they'd decided to come."
"They haven't decided." Rosalie says, quiet for a moment. Her mind is flashing through our words, considering everything Alice and I had said about our trip to Italy months ago.
"We forget - Aro would not do this to us." Esme insists, her voice weak. "He is a friend. He considers Carlisle a friend."
"Friendship only goes so far." Jasper says in a flat voice. We've reached the end of it with him.
"Esme is right." Carlisle says cautiously, his eyes flickering to Jasper. "Aro is a friend, even a distant one. He would not set an army on us."
But I can hear in his though that he is frustrated, convinced that Jasper was right. He doesn't believe his own words, even if he wants to.
"It makes sense. He wants power." I tell Carlisle quietly.
Not necessarily at a cost you are suggesting.
"You didn't see him, Carlisle. He was absolutely entranced by Alice. He has no one like her."
"Perhaps." Carlisle grimaces. "But if what you are suggesting is true, then he knows Alice's visions are fallible."
"No one else knows that." Alice murmurs.
"If he kills everyone who does. . . That knowledge is his alone." Jasper glances to Alice, his eyes worried. I could feel the protective pull he had to her, the one he was projecting on all of us. It was no coincidence that we all leaned toward each other, toward our mates, as he did.
"We'll have to go to Seattle and take care of it ourselves. It's an army, though not well trained." Jasper insists. "It shouldn't be more complicated than we envisioned before."
Emmett grins as Carlisle sighs.
"We'll have to train. We might consider talking to the Denali's." Jasper paces, strategizing. "If we have more. . . It will be easier. They're untrained, but still a threat."
"What if . . . it's a favor." Rosalie mumbles. No one dares interrupt her process as she thinks out loud. "What if, they're offering a second chance?"
"They don't give second chances." Alice responds bleakly. Her thoughts fly to Bella, knowing that we would need to change her the second there was evidence of the Volturi coming to Seattle.
Rosalie ignores Alice. "Carlisle, you've seen it before in your time with them. Someone who has already been in trouble with the rules. Someone they should have destroyed is offered a second chance if they take care of a problem!"
"That would explain the lack of response." Jasper hums.
"Why?" Carlisle asks, shocked. "There's no reason for the Volturi—"
"Yes, there is." I sigh quietly. Carlisle turns to me at once, waiting for my explanation.
I grimace, my jaw hardening automatically as I remember Aro's thoughts. How cornered they had been – how descriptively he had envisioned Alice and I by his side.
"In Aro's head, he saw me at one side and Alice at his other. The idea intoxicated him, Carlisle. I would have thought it would take him much longer to act on the idea. But . . . there was also the thought of you, Carlisle. Of our family. He was concerned about the prospects of us growing stronger and larger. The jealousy." I shake my head, unable to imagine how stupid I was to not realize this before. "The jealousy he had of you having. . . not more than he had, but what he wanted. He tried not to think of it, but he couldn't help himself. The idea of competition was there, terrifying him. Beside their own, ours is the largest coven they've found."
Carlisle's face is a mask of horror as he stares at me, envisioning the Aro I have described.
"He's taken to Alice and I, specifically. Perhaps, knowing Jasper's history, we're not the only ones he'll want to save." I continue quietly. Remembering Aro's infatuation with Bella, I glance toward her. She's trying to fight off her panic, and in our discussion we hadn't noticed. Her heart is drumming in her chest, her skin pale and sleek with sweat. Rosalie nudges Jasper, and he moves to try to help her against the battle she's clearly losing.
Carlisle follows my gaze to Bella, too. "They're too committed to their mission to do this to us, Bella. Don't worry yourself, please." He murmurs to her, squeezing her shoulder. "They would never break the rules themselves, Edward."
It sounds like Carlisle is scolding me. Reminding me to remember my place.
"They'll clean up afterward. They'll take care of whoever they enlisted to their dirty work once we have been taken care of." I respond, too quiet for Bella to hear. "A double betrayal. There's no harm done."
The room is quiet, tense. Each one of my family members frozen in their own thoughts. Bella's breaths are quiet gasps.
"No, Edward." Jasper says. Bella's eyes catch his as he speaks. "I think Carlisle is right. They wouldn't break their rules. . . Besides, this is too sloppy. Whoever is doing this . . . they have no idea what they're doing. These newborns are out of control in Seattle."
"No more." Carlisle finally says, nodding to Bella. She's paled significantly, and it's clear that what we're saying is sending her over the edge. "Drink some tea, Bella." He murmurs to her, holding the glass to her lips. She refuses at first, before finally admitting defeat and sipping from the cup. It's clearly, in her panic, a struggle for her to swallow the small sip.
"You're safe, Bells." Alice promises quietly. This is why we can't talk in front of her.
"You're not!" Bella cries, her eyes widening at Alice and then turning to me. "They're coming after you. All of you!"
"Bella, this is speculation. We don't know anything." I insist quietly. "We'll be okay."
"Jasper." Esme says quietly, turning her eyes to her newest son. This is not good for her. "Calm her."
Bella covers her mouth with her palm, trying to hold back a sob. I kneel in front of her, my hands on her legs.
"Jasper." I say, turning to him. His eyebrows are pulled in concentration as he stares at Bella, though there are no changes in her panic. If anything, she's finding it even more difficult to breathe despite all of our encouraging words. "Jasper, help her, please."
"I can't." he mutters. She's not here.
"What?" I hiss at him, my voice much louder than I had intended as I survey his thoughts.
"I'm trying, Edward." He snaps back, frustrated. I can't find her! "I can't find her . . . I. . ." He trails off and I can see it in his mind.
Bella has simply disappeared. He can't push his gift onto her like he could before, like he can do with all of us right now. Where the rest of us exist in his apparition of the room, Bella does not. She's there, physically on the couch where we can all see her, but Jasper has no effect on her. Just like how she is invisible in my own ability to hear her thoughts. She does not exist to his gift right now.
"Alice." My voice sounds foreign to my own ears as I turn to my sister. She's frozen – her expression a mask of horror, ignorant of what is happening around her.
I see nothing at first, merely hearing voices.
"I want to kill her!" Anger spewed from the man. His back was turned, and I could see nothing but his tall, muscular build with blonde hair. His skin was pale, but not even close to how pale my own skin was. "You can't stop me."
"I need her alive."
Who had the other voice come from? I could not tell, neither could Alice.
"You get the other ones." The man with blonde hair argues. Then he is in her bedroom, his pillow in her hand. One Bella and I had laid our heads on at least a hundred times. I could smell Bella's scent through Alice's vision.
He was enjoying her scent. "I'm going to kill her."
Alice's eyes meet mine as Emmett holds me to the ground. I'm not sure when he had tackled me. I'm not sure when I had stood up, away from Bella. I paid no attention to him, my mind still replaying Alice's vision over and over again.
"A decision was made." Alice whispers, her voice full of dread.
I had to go there. I had to go now!
He's not there right now. Alice tells me firmly, horrified. "That's the future, Edward!"
"I'll fucking wait for him!" I roar.
"Edward, stop it!" Emmett snaps, shoving me further into the ground. "You're freaking Bella out, man."
"Get off." Jasper mutters to Emmett and he complies quietly. I flash to Alice, grabbing her arm in mine. She winces slightly at my strength, and I ignore her pain.
"Edward." Jasper snaps at me. But I ignore him too.
"What was that?" My voice is furious, loud.
"Edward," Alice whispers, her eyes wide with fright for her best friend. "He's not there right now. I don't know where he is."
"Alice, let Bella go." Carlisle instructs. Edward, stop. His hand touches my shoulder, and I relinquish Alice, turning toward Bella.
She's sobbing loudly, having completely lost her fight against her panic attack. She's screaming, clawing at Alice's arms, begging for her to let go. Alice has Bella trapped in her marble arms, and she releases her instantly. Bella scrambles away, falling to the ground in a small ball.
"Bella," I whisper, kneeling at her side. I swallow thickly, unable to blink the image of the man in Bella's room from my eyes.
"Lie her down." Carlisle is instructing. I comply, though Bella fights me. She is struggling to breathe as she works through her panic. I feel like I'm struggling with her.
He wants to kill her. I want to kill him. Someone wants her alive. I want them both gone. I don't know who they are or where they are. I know he will be in Bella's room. I need to be here with Bella.
Bella.
My eyes slip down to hers, she's hyperventilating. The loss of Jasper's influence on her panic is making it worse for her. Before, he was keeping her emotions at bay, limiting them. Now, they were hitting her at full force.
"Bella," I feel like I'm being strangled as I lay down beside her, touching my cheek with my hand. Her eyes slip to my face, wide and fearful. "just breathe. Nothing is going to happen to you."
It's a promise. I won't let anything happen to you. I'll protect you. I'll keep you safe. I'll kill them for you.
But my voice isn't comforting. It's seems just as stifled as hers. My mind replays Alice's vision. His voice is a broken record in my head.
I'm going to kill her.
I need to kill him. I need to kill him.
"Please don't do this." Bella begs.
"Tell me what to do, Bella." I whisper watching her face crumple up in pain. I run my fingers over her hand, watching as she recoils instantly away from me.
"Please don't."
"Bella, you're safe. You'll be safe." I remind her gently. "I'll make sure you're safe."
Besides me, Carlisle presses his fingers to her wrist, his thoughts conveying worry over her rapid heartrate. This stress is not good for her, Edward. Calm her down. Her blood pressure is much too high. She's confused. . .
My family is in the back, quietly retreating away from Bella to give her space.
"What did you see, Alice?" Jasper is asking.
"Him. I saw him." Alice whispers, defeated. "He wants her. He wants to kill her."
Esme lets out a choked gasp. "Who is it, Alice?"
"I couldn't see his face. . . He was talking to someone else. We're right. . . There's a deal of some sort. I don't know who. They're working together."
"Why did you see this vision now?" Esme asks. "When we're talking about it all. . ."
"Don't hurt me." Bella whimpers, bringing my focus back to her. I can't help the pain that shoots through my body at her words. I would never. "He'll kill you. Edward will kill you."
"Bella?" Carlisle asks, her voice full of concern. "Open your eyes."
Alice is describing her vision, drawing it on a paper. Her vision clouds my eyes, but each rasping sound from Bella pulls me back.
"She's confused." Carlisle says, shaking his head at Esme. "Bella, can you hear me?"
Bella's eyes flash to Carlisle's and then squeeze closed again.
"Do you know where you are right now?" Carlisle asks her, squeezing her hand to gain her attention again. Bella whimpers, yanking her hand away.
"Bella, you're home. You're safe." I tell her, gently. "You're here with me right now."
Bella watches me, her eyes swirling from my face to Carlisle's and back again. "He'll kill you. Edward, he'll kill you."
"No one is going to hurt him, Bella." Carlisle tells her soothingly. Her eyes snap from mine to Carlisle, wide with surprise. As if she didn't know he was there still.
"No more hunting." Bella cries, her hands flying to hear skull, pressing against her temples.
"No more." I agree, for Bella's benefit for than mine.
I need to kill him. I look at the drawing Alice has drawn. The exact replica of her vision.
"You're all in danger."
"Bella," I feel like my body is on autopilot as I speak. She flinches away from my hand and pain spreads through me. "focus on me, love. You're safe."
"You're not." Bella cries in response. "It hurts. My head hurts. Stop."
"No one is harming your head." Carlisle insists, but she shies away from his voice, trying desperately to curl her body from us.
"Make it . . . Make it stop." She whimpers, squeezing her eyes closed.
"Here, Carlisle." Esme hands Carlisle a syringe and two bottles. I can smell the contents of each bottle – Ativan and morphine. I didn't know which to bring. . . Were those the right ones? Oh, let me get the other ones too.
"No!" Rosalie hisses at him. Her lip curls over her teeth. "Carlisle, do not!"
"Rose, not now." Esme whispers, holding Rosalie from grabbing the syringe. "She needs it."
"Carlisle!" She yells. "Do not. You promised that girl you wouldn't."
"Leave. Now." Carlisle hisses. Rosalie growls loudly at him, before she realizes his voice is directed at Jasper. The scent of Bella's blood hits me, then, ripping my throat to shreds of flames. Deep red blood is spilling down her face, trailing from her nose down her cheek and onto the white carpet below her. The scent hits me at the same time as everyone else and I can hear their shocked breaths before they stop breathing.
"Carlisle." I hiss and he quiets me, holding his hand up.
"Bella, sweetheart." Carlisle's voice is soothing as he talks to her. "Let me give you something to help with the pain."
"No." Bella gasps, her voice shrill. Her eyes peak open again, visibly cringing from the pain. "No, no!" She sobs loudly as Carlisle reaches for her arm, pushing her sleeve up past her elbow.
"You're okay." Carlisle insists. "I'm not going to hurt you."
Somehow, despite all her panic and pain, Bella's entire body stiffens at the cold touch of an alcohol swap, and she releases a heartbreaking moan of fright.
"You're okay, Bella." Carlisle is saying to her. "I need you to trust me now, sweetheart."
"This isn't consent, Carlisle." Rosalie snaps, her teeth barred. "You swore, Carlisle. Let her decide."
"She's bleeding, Rose." Carlisle whispers, shaking his head. His thoughts were full of guilt and determination. This was the right call, medically and ethically speaking. But did those same ethics in the human world apply to this house? Did they apply to the small girl begging him? "Her blood pressure is too high. This is dangerous."
"Don't hurt me. Please." Bella's whimpering, her voice cracking. "Please."
"I won't. Let me take care of you now, Bella." Carlisle whispers to her gently. He's holding her hand, rubbing it with his thumb. "I won't put you to sleep. It's just to help you calm down."
"Bella, please." I whisper to her. She whimpers at my words, shaking her head. "Please, just let him."
"It hurts."
"I know. Carlisle can make it better."
"Make it stop."
A tiny plea, so quiet a human might have missed it. But Carlisle isn't human. He heard it, and those few words are all he needs to resolve his internal conflict. A heartbreaking moan escapes Bella as Carlisle slips the needle into her skin, and she squeezes her eyes shut, going limp on the floor.
Intravenous medication works in as little as ten seconds, Carlisle had expressed to me once. I was thankful, then, that it worked so quickly. I could see the way Bella's eyes begin to droop and her body starts feeling flaccid with every ragged breath.
Carlisle pulls the needle out, tossing it onto the table. "Just breathe, sweetheart." Carlisle tells her quietly, pulling her sleeve down. "You're okay." His fingers are pressed firmly to her wrist.
Bella complies, her eyes falling shut as her body gives in to the drugs. Carlisle rips off a piece of the blanket covering Bella's body, wiping clear the blood from her face.
"You're okay, you're okay." I whisper to her, holding her hand tighter in mine. The medicine was already working to slow her tears and her heart. She doesn't flinch away from me now.
"I don't want anymore." Bella says, opening her tired eyes to me.
"I won't give you more." Carlisle tells her firmly. "Just let your body rest now."
Bella nods her head slowly, breathing out haggardly. Her tears were drying on her face and very few were replacing them.
"Why is she bleeding, Carlisle?" my voice is sharp as I turn to him.
"I don't know. Let her breathe before we do anything." Carlisle tells me firmly. He's just as stressed by the blood as I am, though capable of being more patient than I was. It may be as simply as her blood pressure spiking with stress and anxiety. It may be more – she has a head trauma. I want to do an MRI.
I grimace, my jaw tightening.
Hold her, Edward. She's terrified in her own mind, even if the medication is keeping her calm. Carlisle stands, moving away from Bella so she has space to relax. His eyes shoot to the drawing Alice had left on the coffee table. He grimaces at the paper, recognition dawning his expression as the image of Bella's attacker. His mind drawing the parallels between himself and the monster, between her fear of him and her fear of her memories.
Let's take her upstairs.
Carlisle says nothing more as I pick Bella up, pulling her into my arms. She stiffens, her eyes opening the slightest bit.
"You're okay, love. Just close your eyes."
She breathes deeply, closing her eyes. I press my lips to her forehead.
"It hurts." She whimpers, pressing her forehead to my chest. "I'm tired."
"Let me take you upstairs." I tell her quietly. "You can sleep." She nods against my chest, pressing her eyes shut tighter. I follow Carlisle up the stairs, taking her to his office. She opens her eyes slowly as Carlisle opens the doors, her eyes widening when she realizes where we are.
Put her there. Carlisle gestures to the medical table in the middle of the room.
Bella is clearly unhappy as I lay her on the table, but she doesn't argue.
"Bella," Carlisle's voice is just as soothing as before when we were downstairs. "I need to do some tests now."
"No." She whispers, shaking her head. I couldn't tell if it was the exhaustion of the headache or the medicine that was making her so weak.
"I let you go before without any tests, but I can't do that again. You were bleeding just now, and I need to understand why." Carlisle explains. "I won't hurt you, you know that." He looks towards me. Edward, do you want to leave?
"If she wants me here, I'm staying." I hiss at him. He nods, letting some of his relief play onto his expression as he leaves Bella's side to retrieve supplies. He, like Alice, was concerned I would leave Bella to hunt down her attacker now.
"Edward," Bella whispers. She struggles to open her eyes, terrified as she looks for me.
"I'm here, Bella." I touch her cheek gently, and she leans into my embrace.
"Stay."
"I will." I promise her, leaning down to kiss her gently. She sighs against me, out of relief or acceptance of my kiss, I'm not sure. Carlisle returns again, setting the supplies besides Bella's still form.
"I'm sorry." Carlisle admits quietly, sticking an IV needle into her arm. "I'll take it out the moment the MRI is over."
He tapes the needle to Bella's hand, using a syringe to inject some clear liquid into her vein. Carlisle slips his hands beneath Bella's limp body, relocating her to the MRI machine that had been placed in the corner. When she's situated in the machine, Carlisle returns to me to wait.
"What did Alice see?" He asks me, his expression frustrated. "I saw the picture. . ."
"Him. In Bella's room. He's made the decision to kill her."
"This is new? I understood that was always the intention." Carlisle wonders quietly. "Why had Alice not seen this before?"
"He left her alive, Carlisle." I sink into the couch, my head in my hands. "He so easily could have killed her. She is alive for a reason, and he changed his mind."
"Her injuries were so severe. . ." Carlisle trails off. He got carried away. His thought disgusts me, though I know he's right. Bella's injuries were not meant to be so severe.
"He was arguing with someone. . . The other one did not want Bella dead." I exhale sharply, realizing. "It's a deal. Like Rosalie said."
"How so?"
"They both want Bella. But the other is getting others. . . That's the deal."
"I don't understand." Carlisle murmurs, turning to look at me. "Who are they talking about?"
I grimace, eyeing him sharply. "If we're right . . . If it's Aro. . . He'll want Alice and I."
Carlisle's eyes narrow at me. "Why?"
"Our gifts. . . I suppose. He has no one like us."
"You're suggesting it was Aro in the vision?" Carlisle demands, his voice incredulous. "The one who is involved in this deal?"
"No one else covets power like him. But I can't imagine why he wants Bella, if not for her gift. I don't know why he might have ordered an attack on her."
"Why not Jasper too?" Carlisle muses, quietly, deep in his thoughts.
At the mention of Jasper, my train of thought changes entirely. "Carlisle," he looks at me tiredly. "Jasper couldn't do anything for Bella." I hiss, my voice tight. "It was as if she didn't exist to him."
His eyes narrow at me as I speak. "I'm not sure I understand what you mean. He's never had an issue influencing Bella's emotions."
"No." I agree. "But . . . She was there, but it was as if she didn't exist to his gift. The same way with mine. She just. . . disappeared."
"Are you still unable to hear her thoughts?"
"Yes."
"I wonder. . ." Carlisle murmurs, thinking. And Alice hasn't seen visions of her recently?
"You know she hasn't."
"That's strange." Carlisle taps his hand on the desk. He's quiet for a long time, looking toward Bella. She's asleep. The Ativan and morphine having pushed her brain to shut itself down and get the rest it so clearly needed.
Aro and Jane had no impact on her, as well?
I nod slowly.
Aro has someone quite like Bella in his guard. The abilities of other's don't impact her. I was there when Aro recruited her.
"Renetta." I agree, remembering the timid vampire that seemed to glue herself to Aro. "She is his guard."
"She protects him." Carlisle nods. "She's a shield, a physical one. You couldn't physically reach anyone she protects, herself included."
"You think Bella is a shield?" I demand.
Carlisle is silent for a long time, continuing to consider Renetta's gift. "Not a physical one. She's confounding many of us, Edward." The question is, how is she controlling it? Jasper has always been able to influence her in the past.
"That's impossible." I hiss. "She can't do that now. She's human."
Carlisle offers me a small smile. "Not necessarily." We've always wondered why Alice ended up the way she did. Being burned at the stake for seeing the future wasn't as common in the twentieth century, though. She discovered many things during our tenure from Forks, Edward.
"A shield. . ." I say, testing the word on my tongue.
"And a powerful one too, I imagine. If she's capable of resisting abilities now."
"That doesn't explain why she's suddenly repulsive to Jasper's abilities." I mutter, leaning heavily against his desk.
Carlisle grimaces. "Traumatic experiences unlock things in the human mind they never realized they had control over. Perhaps, feeling threatened in that moment, she was using her shield without knowing. She was protecting herself subconsciously when she felt vulnerable."
"That's not possible."
"Isn't it?" Carlisle looks at me, raising an eyebrow. We know of plenty that Aro has recruited who showed potential in their human time. Jane and Alec being among them. "They are incredibly gifted now."
"Carlisle, having a gift as a human is one thing. But being able to use it and control it while still human is something else entirely. It's not possible."
Carlisle shrugs his shoulders. "You understand what happened better than I. I wasn't paying attention to Jasper. . ." We can talk to Eleazar about it. He's much more knowledgeable, having spent more time with the Volturi.
I shake my head in disbelief.
"I am certain she is controlling it. Whether or not she is aware of what she is doing is something else entirely." Carlisle hums quietly. "She will be incredibly powerful as a vampire, Edward." Absolutely unique.
"And valuable to Aro, Carlisle." I tell him, thinking back to Alice's vision. "Which is why he might be against someone wanting to kill her."
Carlisle looks towards me but says nothing.
We remain quiet for the remainder of the test, both of us lost in our thoughts about the fragile, yet unbelievably strong, girl in the MRI machine. Bella had, thankfully, stayed relaxed enough to slip into a light sleep, even as I pulled her back into my arms.
Carlisle was quick and efficient as he collected multiple vials of blood through her IV before pulling the tubing out completely and releasing her from his make-shift hospital. When Carlisle deemed Bella free, I swiftly took her to my room and away from the prying concern of the rest of my family. Carlisle would deal with them himself.
"Edward," Bella whispers quietly as I pull the covers over her body. She struggles to lift her head to look at me. The headache and panic, Carlisle had said, was the reason for her sudden weakness. Her MRI was clear, minus the concussion she had been diagnosed with three weeks ago that was slowly healing.
"Yes, Bella?"
She forces her tired eyes open, searching for me in the dark room. "Don't go to Seattle to fight them. Stay with me."
"I will, Bella. I swear." I vow, pulling her against my body. I mean it, remembering the much realer death threat hanging over her head. I wouldn't be leaving her side anytime soon.
She curls into me, her body shivering against mine.
"I'm tired."
"Sleep, then."
Bella only nods in response, her eyes already closed as she slips back into her drug-induced unconsciousness.
