Out of near infinity you chose this tale once again. Thank you for coming, a bit of a note before we begin, this chap was written before GT4. You may figure out why that's important when reading on your own but I won't spoil. One thing I'm pleasantly shocked about is that people have taken a liking to Muireann. Trust me… most of the shit relating to her wasn't really too planned out. Just me going 'I wonder what would fit her'. So any best girl traits are purely coincidental. Onto reviews
Whwsms:{Yeah, he is a bit dense… maybe. Or he's just that self deprecating, who flipping knows. Theres a number of ways that scenario could have played out. But I wanted to take a different approach than most seemed too. Hence Touma choosing to use his phones reminder.}
5had0wHand:{People often forget that Touma doesn't need to remember something to save them. But in this case they also seem to forget the convince of technology. Seriously…. Reminders exist for a reason.
Dude needs a break but even us fanfic authors don't give it to him.
First answer, Unlikely unless I make a sequel but that depends on if I end up feeling like it.
Second answer Dude… who the actual fuck do you think Ainmire is? XD}
Fencer29:{Indeed, oddly lucky ain't it? And yeah they don't count
Well Othinus did mention that his misfortune is oddly low. Be it in a joke, how come no one's said anything about my jokes?! Even saying they are bad jokes would be fine. Just give me some kind of input plz! XD}
Comrade-elmo1:{Yeah… I see his reasoning, she's fun to bully but not as fun as Touma is. Just so much shit you can get away with because… Misfortune
Yep the convince of technology people, don't go thinking forgetting is gonna stop Touma.}
Guest#?:{still not sure if you're the same guest, and well a bit of cringe is unavoidable. But I wouldn't be doing the story justice if I didn't portray the characters as best I could. Also.. can we admit that Aogami and Tsuchi exist for cringe?}
Now then let this tale of an infinity commence once more.
Chapter 24
A Tsuchimikado Maid Seal of approval
Shortly after the incident Touma, Index, Othinus, Aogami, Tsuchimikado and Saten left Josephs. Aogami and Tsuchimako split off right at the exit, stating that they had a few things they needed to do before they met up at the cafe they found. Tsuchimikado had a really wide grin that appeared to unsettle Touma.
So Index, Othinus, Touma, and Saten continued off, chatting together. Saten kept asking questions about magic and events relating to it that Index and Touma tried their hardest to avoid revealing too much about. Oddly Othinus was fairly proactive in the conversations with Saten.
"So you're one of this city's so-called level zeros, yet from what I've understood you are fairly intelligent as well as have a very creative mind. Which both seem like some qualities that are required for higher level esper abilities" The one eyed God mused
Saten shrugged "I don't exactly know what you mean by that but I'm guessing that It might have to do with my personal reality. Probably isn't that well realized or something"
Othinus nodded for a moment and Touma spoke up "Othi-san I don't know much about norse mythology but one thing I did learn was that the head god was very, very obsessed with learning things." he then turned to Othinus with a suspicious gaze "You aren't pulling a… what was it? Mead of poetry are you?"
Othinus went red and started coughing "c-clearly you don't know about norse mythology otherwise you'd have never made that comparison!"
Saten tilted her head and spoke "what was she trying to do?"
Touma sighed "scam some info out of you"
Othinus shouted in retort at Touma "If you had actually read that myth you'd know there was more to it than just scamming some info out of a giant's daughter"
Index recalled some of the knowledge of her grimores and spoke up herself "The story of the mead of poetry is one where Odin, after learning of the mead's location in the mountain Hnitbjorg set off to obtain it"
As Index spoke she saw Othinus's face begin to pale as she looked to the nun shaking her head so rapidly someone could have mistaken her for a bobblehead.
Index seeing this smiled and continued she was gonna like embarrassing Othinus "Odin visited the brother of the one who kept the mead, Baugi and tired to convince him to allow him to have a drink of the mead. This didn't pan out of course as Baugi had no authority over it's distribution but he did agree to aid him"
Othinus by this point had leapt from Touma's shoulder onto her's and was trying to force her mouth Shut. Touma and Saten were both listening intently, the latter holding back her laughter at Othinus's behavior. And the former sighing and shaking his head, as a result. The four had stopped near the district seven middle school dormitories.
Index continued heedless of Othinus's desprate cries to stop and 'for hel's sake shut up' "Odin and Baugi were turned away by the mead's keeper Suttugen but didn't give up so the two went to an area of the mountain nearest to the chamber holding the mead they then used a drill to dig into the mountain, once the hole was completed Odin passed through and turned into a charming young man and seduced the Guardian Gunnlod. The agreement was if he slept three days and nights with her, he could have access to the mead, three sips."
Othinus this time shouted at the top of her tiny lungs "PLEASE STOP! Don't you dare continue that story or I swear by my name and the halls of Valhalla I'll-" but was cut off as Sphinx leapt from Index's habit and attacked her allowing Index to continue.
She glance for a moment at Othinus who was shouting profanities at her face white as a sheet before finishing the tale. "The mead was in three vats sooo Odin took a few liberties in the interpretation. And had three big sips emptying all three before shapeshifting into an eagle and flying off to Asgard. Suttug noticing, also change into an eagle to give chase, before they reached Asgard however, a few drops of mead made their way out of Odin's eagle rear and landed in midgard which is apparently where bad poetry comes from." She finally stopped and glanced at Othinus who had her face in her hands and was beet red.
Saten fell over laughing "my… my oh my god! You… you named yourself after a god who… literally crapped out bad poetry!?" causing Othinus to glare at her
"It's purely metaphorical! It was my first attempt at writing poetry! Of course it was gonna be bad!" The little former god was crying as she finally managed to get the Calico cat off of her and began to climb Touma's leg. "Oi! Human you're not laughing too are you?"
Touma stiffened and sighed "I..im sorry it's just..." he then burst out laughing "how bad were those poems Othinus!? How bad were they that they were translated into literal… well crap!?" this earned him a jab to the carotid artery causing him to stumble.
Othinus sighed and hung her head before curling up on Touma's shoulder "please don't tell anyone about it?" to which Touma nodded "thanks, Understander"
Saten finally got her breath back and checked her phone "oh darn, um well we're close to my dorm and I gotta get back there and do my homework but, I'd like to hang out some more," she then turned to Touma "maybe I can introduce you to one of my friends, you know besides Misaka and Kuroko who you know."
Index didn't know the second name but she was positive it was a girl's name which made her annoyed. Just how many girls did Touma know that she did not know about? She watched as Saten skipped off excitedly to the middle school dorms even twirling once before Index continued walking quickly catching up to Touma, picking up Sphinx along the way.
After around twenty minutes Touma's phone made a buzzing noise. It didn't sound like a phone call and Touma looked shocked at it. He took out his phone and checked it. His eyes went wide for a second but then he smiled as if he had done something he was proud of. But as this was Touma, misfortune was always one step behind and he ran into a large figure before Index could react.
There were, five maybe seven of them, all very clearly delinquents, all very… very clearly upset. And when they turned to see who had bumped into their leader their eyes all went wide in recognition
"It's that bastard again! Get him!" One of them Shouted and, before Index knew it she was being picked up and carried as Touma dashed off carrying her.
"Touma Touma! Who are those guys?" asked Index to the very clearly panicked Touma. Othinus was clinging to his collar but smiling slightly.
"Oh just some bastards who I guess I met before you Index!" shouted Touma as he ran through Alleyways and roads trying to throw the delinquents off. To not much avail as they were only a few feet behind shouting even more profanities than a sailor should.
Othinus smirked "Hey, Human look on the bright side your Misfortune's acting up, guess it's not the end of the world" her tone was teasing and Touma's face went slightly red
"Don't make fun of this Kamijou-san's Misfortune you two thousand year old man of a god!" shouted Touma causing Index to Snicker and Othinus to twitch.
They rounded a corner and Index saw an open dumpster which was filled with what appeared to be organic garbage. Touma noticed it too and he looked to Index "I'll apologize for this later Index, but I don't want you getting dragged into my personal problem!"
And the next thing Index knew, she was flying through the air towards the open dumpster as Touma dashed down the alley.
...
After unceremoniously throwing Index into the trash quite literally, Kamijou continued to lead the delinquents far away from that particular dumpster.
"Damn it you master escapist! Just fucking, Ow! Let us catch you!" shouted one
"And let you beat the shit out of me? Hel no!" Kamijou shouted back turning another corner
"Your Really popular with the backstreats aren't you Human" Othinus teased him on his shoulder.
"No thank you Othi-sama this Kamijou-san would rather not be popular with them" Kamijou retorted. Before running down a road crossing and turning into another Alley
"Damn it dude's slippery as an eel! Fucking hell!?" shouted another of the delinquents.
Othinus leaned against Kamiou's head holding onto his ear "Any reason I wasn't thrown into the Dumpster?" she asked still teasing
The delinquents were a bit ways behind them now "You think you'd have not found some way to avoid that Othinus?" Kamijou responded, smiling slightly at her. "Also I doubt they'd be interested in some guy's barbie doll soo, your in no danger of them"
Othinus pouted slightly "oh and I thought you throwing Index in the Dumpster and not me was a metaphor" her tone was only slightly disappointed but mostly still teasing.
They rounded another corner and Kamijou faceplanted into something soft that made a squeak. Something soft…. And familiar, and not in a good way, not in Kamijou's mind at least. No, what he had face planted into was the precursor to misfortune. He quickly tried back up and covered his head in preparation for being beaten to a pulp but instead found himself being squeezed into that familiarly soft, warm feminine smelling cushion.
"OI! Stop pushing my Understander into your damn breasts horny saint!" shouted Othinus from his shoulder to which the pressure was released.
Touma looked up to see standing before him, someone he was actually glad to see. Long ebony hair tied back into a long ponytail reaching her waist, an outfit cut asymmetrically to enhance her magic. Very generously gifted in the chest area, and wielding a long nodachi.
Kanzaki Kaori stood before him, she looked slightly teary eyed as she spoke "Im sorry, It's just the last time I saw him um, and when I heard what happened I was worried. I owe him so much so" stumbling over her words, Kanzaki tried to explain herself.
However, fate or rather misfortune was a very cruel mistress who would not let Kamijou forget her. And so the delinquents rounded the corner and stopped. "Finally! Got you" said their leader.
One of them Noticed Kanzaki and whistled "Damn and there's a bombshell too, once we're done beating the shit out of that guy lets have fun with her." he said
Kanzaki's face went dark when she heard them mention beating the shit out of Kamijou. Before Kamijou could react, he felt a soft hand on his shoulder and saw a cold look in Kanzaki's eyes. "I must repay my debts to you, so allow me to handle these people who'd harm you" she said, smiling.
What happened next could only be described as a one sided massacre, without the blood and death. One moment Kanzaki was next to Kamijou, the next with the sound of an explosion she was next to the delinquent at the front. She karate chopped him on the back of the neck sending him flying into a wall unconscious. Next she was behind two more holding the Nodachi still in its scabbard. Those two fell without even noticing her attack. Then she was in the middle of three of them and she spun on one heel kicking one into a wall, palm smacking the next into a dumpster, and karate chopping the third one on the neck sending him crashing to the ground.
Only their leader was left and he fell on his ass backing up "Aw fuck, this isn't what I imagined would happen when I met a hot girl" were his last words before the hilt of the Nodachi found it's way into his face and he was knocked unconscious.
Kanzaki quickly turned towards Kamijou smiling. Only to stumble back with a confused and upset frown at Touma's expression. Which had a mixture of shock, and horror on it.
"Othinus…. It turns out i've been quite lucky avoiding Kanzaki's wrath… remind me never to get on her bad side" whispered Kamijou to his small Understander
Othinus pulled down the front of her hat "Lucky huh? I'm getting a really bad feeling about your future human. But I'll remind you if need be" she said.
Kanzaki spoke nervously "Did I mess up? Oh no please don't tell me I messed up I couldn't bear messing up when trying to repay my debts" It was quite something to see the powerful saint a nervous wreck after taking down an entire gang of delinquent with such ease.
Kamijou shook his head "N-no you didn't in fact you saved me a lot of time, sure I would have eventually thrown them off but that would have taken at least half an hour" he said smiling nervously at the saint.
With a sigh of relief Kanzaki walked over "Thank the lord, who are they?" the saint asked quizically "they don't look like fey"
Othinus snickered a moment then laughed "oh they'd be some pretty damn ugly fey if they were" she supported herself on Kamijou's head as she spoke.
Shrugging, Kamijou responded "Just some delinquents that don't seem to like me due to past dealings."
Kanzaki stopped in front of Kamijou forcing him to look up "oh well that's good, when I heard that the fey hunting you and Index were a lot more powerful than expected I was very worried." she then paused "speaking of, where is Index?"
Kamijou's face went white "oh shit! Thanks for the help Kanzaki! But I have something important to do which will likely end in this Kamijou-san's skull being bitten so I'll see you later bye!" he quickly spoke running off before Kanzaki could react.
Watching the retreating boy's back with her arm reached out, Kanzaki muttered to herself "I wanted to ask how you've been… damn it that darn Spy is getting in my head isn't he!?"
...
After managing to get herself out of the dumpster it took another seven minutes for Touma to return. After some well deserved punishment (which may or may not have included several bites to the skull of an unfortunate highschool boy) and an explanation. It had become the evening and the three headed off in the direction of the cafe Tsuchimikado and Aogami had informed Touma of.
Standing in front of it Index felt her eyes twitch "Tooouumaaaaaaa" she could feel the anger and jealousy rising within her. "Is this Really the place!?" she asked angrily.
Touma sighed "Index if I tried to go home I guarantee you that Nyah Nyah bastard would have set up a gas trap in my front door which would have informed him that we had returned there. To which he and Aogami would have dragged me here, one way or another with my consent or not this Kamijou-san would be forced to come here" the look in his eyes was of despair as he stared at the cafe in front of them.
Index felt puzzled at that "Touma why are you so scared? I read that boys love this kind of thing" this caused Touma to twitch and mutter something she didn't quite catch.
Othinus sighed "He's thinking the moment he walks in there, that there will be a cascade of misfortune that will lead to him being stuck working there for the rest of his school days." she was also unamused as they stared at the building in front of them.
Touma groaned "Othi-san I don't need you to broadcast my thoughts for all to hear."
Index once more turned to the building in front of them, now she had heard of these types of Cafe, but she had never been to one. Looking up at the name of the establishment it read.
Keirejouse's Maid Cafe
Entering the cafe they saw a small foyer with a reception counter that led to a larger polished room with pale mint colored brick wall design and a marble checker pattern floor. The receptionist dressed as a maid seeing them walked over and bowed forwards slightly.
"Welcome back master we've been expecting you" she said, she had short brown hair and spectacles, the outfit was a classic french maid's but with a palette swap. Brown where there would be black, and pale yellow-white where there would be plain white.
She led them over to a table where two familiar faces sat waving, Index assumed that Toumas, 'friends' had told the receptionist their description before they came so she'd know where to seat them.
Sitting down on a table near the windows on the far side of the room Touma glared at his friends. Index approved of that, they shouldn't force Touma into things he didn't consent to. "I had my suspicions… but… really?" Touma forced out. "It's just a maid cafe. You're gonna need to try harder than that for me to want to come here."
Aogami looked about ready to lunge at Touma as if he said something blasphemous, which maybe to that pervert, he did. Index didn't know Index didn't want to know, however Tsuchimikado held him back and smiled at Touma "Nyah, don't worry they got something, or someone special that I think will make you change your mind"
Index did not like the way he worded that and was about to voice her thoughts when a voice spoke up from behind her. A very newly familiar voice, one she did not expect at all to hear here.
"G-good t-ta see ya m-m-masters may I t-take y-your ord'ers?" hearing that unstable scottish accent Index turned around to confirm her suspicions and her suspicions were indeed confirmed.
Standing next to the table, face darker than she had ever seen her, stood Mureiann Conan the Selkie warrior, shifting from foot to foot holding a tray to take orders on. She was wearing a victorian style maid outfit with a seafoam green front and dark ocean blue sides. The straps were a dark ocean green, Her seal hoodie/skin was tied around her chest with the hood down. and she wore a set of ocean blue heels.
She had trouble looking at the group and seemed very nervous, she seemed to be shivering in pain and exceedingly embarrassed but at the same time. Index couldn't help but notice that she kept glancing towards Touma who was oddly silent.
Looking over to Touma Index felt nervous, Touma looked shocked yes, but it wasn't a bad shocked. And what he said next made Index feel a jolt of jealousy "Muireann? Is that you? You look good" he then turned to the two perverts. "Okay you've got me, im impressed, how did you get Muireann to play along with this?"
Murieann slammed her tray down and glared at Touma a moment "O-orders, please m-master" merely saying that caused her to blush and shrink back.
Touma froze a moment but upon Othinus saying something in his ear decided to look at the menu. "Um then I'll have the Fairy queen's curry?" To which Murieann wrote something down on the piece of paper on her tray, her hands shaking slightly.
Murieann then took orders from everyone including Index who ordered something highly expensive In spite of Touma's actions. This was supposed to be her day with him, her easter! and yet look at him enjoying a maid cafe and the company of a Selkie girl who was their enemy! She suddenly stopped at those thoughts, why was she so protective of Touma? Was she really so petty as to think he was her's?
A few minutes later they suddenly heard some excited squeels come from the kitchen and excited murmurings. To which Tsuchimikado and Aogami's faces paled.
"Oh no" said the Siscon brother of Maika
"It can't be" said the blue haired pervert of unspeakable tastes.
"The Kami-yan disease has already taken the cafe!" they both shouted in despair.
Whatever that meant, Index had no clue, but one thing she knew for certain.
The number of rivals for Touma had just increased, again.
