It was around 8 p.m, and Renee had just left the shower and was walking through the hall in her bathrobes when she heard a peculiar and unexpected sound. Her brother humming?

Raising an eyebrow, she walked up to his room, which had its door left wide open, and saw him lying belly down on his bed, swinging his feet back and forth in a cheerful rhythm and staring into some kind of book.

And he appeared to be completely oblivious to her presence, which was quite unlike him.

Out of morbid curiosity, Renee kept observing him.

The book Ryan was looking at was an old, largely empty scrapbook of his. He was feeling rather odd today but in a good way.

He was overwhelmed with a sense of bliss. While he had tried to stay cool around her and even risked Lynn`s wrath with a quick peck to the check, once he was alone Ryan let the reality of what had happened to him this morning fully sink in.

Lynn had revealed that she harbored a crush on him. She honestly liked him! He still couldn't believe that it was true. And yet it was.

It brought him a sense of joy he hadn't felt in God knows how long. There was no catch to this. No reason to be cynical or suspicious of her sincerity, it was real. This pretty and amazing girl with whom he had formed such an honest and strong camaraderie felt the same way about him as he did about her. The universe was finally smiling upon him!

Marceline jumped on his bed and lowered her head to sniff the book. Ryan smiled at her as he finished putting in some pictures of Lynn which she had given to him.

None of them included him, which was ironic since the book used to be filled with pictures of the two of them hanging out together, but now that time had been reversed he had to recreate them. Not that he minded it. If anything, this time would be ten times better.

After he closed the book, Ryan saw his cat looking up at him curiously.

Ryan pulled her into his lap and embraced her, feeling her soft fur and her head rubbing under his chin.

"Ah, Marcy. Today was one of the best days I ever had." he spoke blissfully. Marceline felt confused, her master was acting weirdly. Like he was high on catnip or something.

Renee noticed it too. Her brother looked oddly happy, and not in a smug or gleeful way.

Ryan stroked Marceline`s back. " Lynn really likes me! After all this time, she finally likes me!" Ryan beamed in an uncharacteristically enthusiastic manner and held Marceline up to look her in the eye while sporting a ridiculous grin.

Marceline tilted her head in confusion before he placed her back in his lap and let out a breathy chuckle.

"Well, that explains it." Renee rolled her eyes and stepped in.

"You don't say?" she snarked, though her entrance hardly startled Ryan.

Renee folded her arms. "I have to admit, I`m surprised she had the nerve to actually tell you that. And here I thought you two were in for three seasons worth of imbecilic sitcom drama."

She expected Ryan to either be annoyed or throw some "clever" comeback at her. Instead, he sent her a pleasant smile.

"Oh, not Lynn. She was never afraid to speak her mind." he replied in a very civil manner, one in which the two rarely communicated. It honestly surprised Renee.

She curled her lip and deadpanned, "Well congratulations. I apologize for not leaping with joy. I had a long, tiresome day."

"No, problem, sis." Ryan shrugged.

Despite remaining composed, Renee was dumbfounded. Had Ryan honestly been reduced to a lovesick, passive schmuck? That couldn't be for real.

She thought about speaking her mind and telling him how trivial and stupid romance was and how he and the Loud girl probably wouldn't last until the end of summer but decided against it. That would imply that she had some form of investment in this affair that was entirely irrelevant to her personal life.

She had nothing else to say, no reason to continue the conversation. She was ready to leave when Ryan`s phone rang. He picked it up and smirked.

"Not even four hours and they already need my help again." he laughed to himself. That remark piqued his sister`s curiosity.

It was a message from Lincoln. "Big crisis at home! Sisters gonna ruin everything! Please come quickly!"

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Dont get your superhero tights in a twist twinkle toes. Im on my way" Ryan sent his reply before placing Marceline on the bed and standing up and stretching his arms.

"The Louds?" Renee asked dryly.

"You guessed it. They need my help. Again." Ryan shrugged. "Babysitting troubles."

Renee snorted. "You and the Loud girl? Babysitting? Whom? Are you overseeing a group of kids that are being transferred to juvenile hall?"

"Worse." Ryan smirked. "As y`know, Lynn and Lincoln have a big family. Meaning we`re gonna have to take care of eight babies tonight!"


Half an hour ago...

This could not be happening. Lincoln couldn't believe it. He had finally gotten through to his dad, perhaps even a lot better than he had anticipated. But then, just like his usual luck, the moment things started looking up they began spinning out of control.

He had rushed down into the basement, following his older sisters who had just brought down a long table and placed in the far corner, while a few other teenage girls were decorating the place.

He finally confronted the very catalyst of this incoming disaster while she was by herself mixing up the punch bowl.

"Lori, you can't go through with this! You're breaking your promise!" he outright yelled at her and threw his arms up.

"Correction, twerp, I made no promise that I wouldn't hold my party." she scoffed at him. "Dad was being an unreasonable killjoy and I`m not making a fool out of myself because of him."

Lincoln seethed while Lori dipped her finger into the punch to taste test it.

"I`m not talking about the party, I`m-

"Hey, Becky! I need more watermelon!" Lori called one of her friends who nodded and headed for the kitchen.

Lincoln fumed. "Are you listening to me?!"

"We`ve been over this, twerp. A party like this one is an important social event for young women like myself." Lori retorted condescendingly. "I don't expect a kid like you to understand this."

"I understand perfectly what's going on! You're disrespecting our parents!"

"Bro, chill out. Why are you so jumpy about this?" Luna joined the conversation as she placed a boombox on the table. "We`ve done this before. A little party won't be the end of the world."

Lincoln turned to her. "Dad said no party, but you`re going through with it anyway!"

"Exactly, and it will be over before he and mom return. What they don't know won't hurt them." Lori shrugged.

"So you want to lie to them?"

Luna scowled. "Dude, you have lied to them too when you did something you shouldn't have. I don't think you have the right to lecture us."

"That`s not the point." Lincoln countered. "This party could wreck the house and when our parents come back-"

Lori made an exaggerated groan. "For the millionth time, Lincoln. You think I haven`t thought about it? I`ve already laid down the party rules. The party will be kept to the basement, the guests will be told not to go into any other room or to touch anything there."

"And you expect them all to go along with it?" Lincoln questioned her irritably.

"You have a point, dude." Luna agreed but then pointed over her shoulder. "But that's why we called Chaz over."

Lincoln saw her pointing at a fat teenager in a striped t-shirt and blue cap who was wearing sunglasses and standing stoically under the stairs with his arms crossed.

"No party host worth their salt forgets the bouncer." Luna explained.

"Exactly, so why don't you quit being a nuisance and go read a comic or something?" Lori added curtly while shooing him.

Lincoln glowered at her. "Lori, mom and dad put you in charge-"

His sister rolled her eyes. "Duh. That's why I officially un-canceled the party. Your point is?"

"My point is that they left you to babysit our little sisters. How are you supposed to do that while hosting a party that they can't even attend?" a frustrated Lincoln pointed out before turning to Luna.

"I don't see you volunteering to take her place? Neither is Leni."

Looking slightly ashamed, Luna shrank back. But Lori just scoffed and folded her arms.

"Way ahead of you on that little issue." she stated smugly.

"How?" Lincoln asked suspiciously.

"Oh, sweet, innocent, Lincoln." Lori shook her head. "Here`s a life lesson for you. Why resign yourself to a grueling chore when you have some sap on standby who will more than gladly let you guilt-trip them into doing it for you?"

"What?"

Lincoln quickly got his answer when Luan joined them, dressed in a knee-high yellow dress and with her brown hair neatly brushed and hanging down. Lori and Luna sent her less-than-friendly looks.

"Girls, I need your opinion. And I want the absolute truth!" she exclaimed in an excited and breathy voice before possing. "How do I look?"

"Like a fool wrapped in a banana peel." Lori commented snidely. Luna suppressed a snicker.

Lincoln could see the immediate look of hurt on the comedian's face and it made him angry. The girls still weren't over giving Luan crap.

"And by that you mean that I look appealing, right?" Luan asked weekly. Lori sent her an exasperated glare.

"Ignore her, Luan. I think you look good." Lincoln spoke up for her. Luan looked at him and grew a weak smile.

"You think so?" she asked hopefully.

"Sure I do, the color suits your sunny and corny personality. Eh...get it?"

"Oh, give me a break!" Lori groaned and snapped her head back before glaring at the comedian. "Listen, Brace Face..."

Luan noticeably cringed at the name and Lincoln glared at Lori.

"If you thought getting dressed up will get you into this party, then sorry to pop your bubble. This isn't a kids party."

Luan grew agitated and faced Lori.

"Then why am I not allowed? I`m not a kid! I`m thirteen, a teenager!"

Lori scoffed and folded her arms. "Teenager? Yes. But as far as me and my friends are concerned, you aren't a young adult like us until you get into high school. Fourteen and older only. Your childish behavior doesn`t help."

"Not to mention you`re still on thin ice with us, bra." Luna added casually.

Luan pouted. Lincoln placed his hand on her shoulder.

"It`s just a party, sis. It`s not worth-"

"But! If you wish to redeem yourself in our eyes..." Lori shrugged offhandedly.

Lincoln didn't like the sound of that. He could tell Lori was plotting something.

But Luan, eagerly wanting to finally earn her sisters` forgiveness for her Prankmageddon, took the bait.

"What? What do you need?" she asked desperately, already dreading her decision.

Lori smirked. "Well, you could relieve me of my chore and babysit the little ones?"

"Babysit?" Luan grew nervous. "I...I...eh..."

Lori feigned shock. "What? Is that too much for you?"

Luna saw what Lori was doing. "Yeah, you said you weren't a kid. How about you prove it? Babysitting is a natural responsibility for teenagers."

"And we would be more than grateful. What with our hands being full, hosting this party and all." Lori added.

Lincoln couldn't believe Lori`s nerve or that Luna was playing along. They were using Luan as a patsy, exploiting her guilt to shirk their responsibilities.

He wanted to warn her, but he was too late. The offer was too tempting for the gullible comedian.

"Alright! I`ll do it!" she hastily agreed. Lincoln facepalmed.


Lucy was alone in her room, writing another poem while sitting against her bed when she heard someone grumbling. She looked and saw Lincoln pass through the hall while using his phone.

Her curiosity was once again roused. Her brother always seemed to be bothered about something this week.

Lincoln sent his text message, at least wanting to spare himself the indignity of personally talking and begging Ryan for help.

He sighed when someone grabbed his arm. Lincoln jolted and looked around to find Lucy by his side.

"Something is troubling you?" she asked simply.

"Lucy?" he quickly recovered, having grown accustomed to her sneak attacks.

"I can sense that you're worried. Do...do you want to talk about it?" Lucy asked him upfront, inwardly she was quite happy that for once Lynn wasn't there to push her away from talking to her brother.

Lincoln exhaled and ran his hand through his hair. There wasn't much use trying to hide things from Lucy.

"It`s this party..." he admitted.

"Oh, are you upset that Lori deemed you too "un-cool" to be allowed in?" Lucy concluded. "Because you can spend time with me...if you want to."

"It`s not that. I`m just worried that this stupid party will mess up our house and mom and dad will be upset when they return. And they really deserve a break given how they haven't gone out in a while."

"I see, that does suck." Lucy agreed morosely. "But we can't do anything to change Lori`s mind about disobeying dad. If nothing else, she and the others will probably get in trouble for it." Lucy tried to lift his spirit a bit, but it didn't seem to be working.

"If only it was that simple." Lincoln thought and sighed before growing a more serious expression.

"I wouldn't give up just yet. I just called in the big guns."

"Who?" the goth questioned when Luan appeared, still wearing her dress.

"There you two are." she greeted them.

"Why are you dressed like that?" Lucy asked her.

Luan swallowed. "Eh...I was just trying out my new dress. Nothing important." she lied.

"Lori, Leni and Luna didn't let you into their party?"

"As you know, Linky..." a nervous Luan nimbly turned to her brother "...I was tasked with looking after you guys for the night and I`ve planned lots of fun activities for all six of us!"

"Sigh. If it's all the same to you, I`d prefer to just return to my coffin early and sleep." Lucy said unenthusiastically.

Lincoln groaned exasperatedly. "Luan, I really don't have time to be babysat." he brushed her off, hardly acknowledging her with any authority.

The comedian`s smile fell, as she was immediately greeted with dismissive attitudes, and from the two siblings who weren't ostensibly angry at her.

"But...but...I`m supposed to keep an eye on you. It's my responsibility." she feebly argued.

Lincoln ignored her because his phone rang and he turned away to see Ryan`s reply.

He was coming. Lincoln was mildly relieved, though he didn't know how Ryan would react to the absence of the third member of their secret team.

"We`re not the ones who will need a chaperone. Those partygoers down below are a disaster waiting to happen." Lincoln said in a steely voice and grimaced.

Luan squinted one eye in confusion. "Huh? How is a party a disaster waiting to happen?"

"Nevermind." Lincoln pinched the bridge of his nose. "I`m waiting for Ryan to come."

Luan`s jaw dropped and her pupils shrank.

"Ryan`s coming back?" Lucy asked. Lincoln nodded.

"He`ll be here any moment now. I...eh...need his help with something."

Lincoln didn't exactly know right now what that "something" was going to be. At this moment, he had no idea how to handle this situation between his little sisters needing someone to keep an eye on them while also doing something about the party below.

He looked back at the awestruck Luan, while Lucy grew a small smile.

"Ryan`s coming?" Luan jumped up excitedly before growing nervous. She hadn't seen him in nearly 48 hours and he hadn't answered any of her fifty or so messages while she was at Sunset Canyon.

Was he ignoring her? The thought scared her.

Looking down at her dress, Luan felt a boost in confidence. There was no way Ryan could resist her now. And best of all, that infernal jock that she, unfortunately, was related to was out of the picture.

"Yes, he is." Lincoln sighed dejectedly. "Now, if you need help babysit-"

"Later, guys!" Luan rushed past them and into the bathroom. Lincoln saw her run up to the mirror and start checking her face out for any blemishes and style her hair.

Lincoln groaned, wanting to bang his head against the wall. Luan coming on to Ryan was the last thing he needed tonight.

"Can I wait for Ryan too?" Lucy asked him shyly.

"Sure, why not." Lincoln sighed.


Lincoln was tapping his fingers against the couch, waiting. He used his other hand to pet a sleeping Cliff.

Lucy sat next to the cat, quiet as usual, but Lincoln noticed a sense of eagerness in her demeanor.

They could faintly hear music playing from the basement, and Chaz was standing next to the door leading down to it, with a velvet rope placed at the entrance.

"Lincoln?"

"Yes?"

"Will Ryan stay for the night, again?"

Lincoln tried not to grimace and exhaled. "All things considered, I wouldn't place it out of the realm of possibility."

"Cool." the goth smiled. "You think he`ll tuck me in and read Bram Stoker`s Dracula to me?"

Lincoln rolled his eyes. Even if things go south like the first time at least Lucy will still have her new favorite person in the world.

He should probably have felt happy for her, his own opinion on Ryan aside.

"I suppose you'll have to ask him yourself..." the boy shrugged when the doorbell rang. Before either could get up to answer, Lori bolted to the door and opened it.

"Boo-Boo Bear!" she squealed and clutched her hands as she met her boyfriend.

Lincoln cringed. "Don't look, Lucy. This will be super-sappy."

"Don`t need to tell me twice." the goth replied while pressing her head into a pillow.

"Babe!" the Hispanic teenager threw his arms up in ecstasy. "I`m sorry I`m late, I had to drive my sister to the arcade." he said apologetically.

"Doesn`t matter, you're here now, my little Cutie Patootie." a sparkly-eyed Lori gushed.

Lincoln was ready to vomit as the couple leaned in to kiss when someone forcefully shoved Bobby out of the way.

Lori froze and gasped in horror as Ryan jumped into the scene.

"Someone called for Ryan Taylor!" he announced his arrival loudly.

"You!" Lori snarled. "How dare you-"

"Yeah, yeah..." Ryan casually strolled past and looked around "...now where's the little guy with the fair white hair?"

"Here." an exasperated Lincoln approached him. "So glad you could make it, Ta-eh Ryan." he droned.

He was immediately pulled into a one-armed hug, which nearly choked him out.

"You little rascal." Ryan laughed smarmily as he gave him a noogie. "Can't a guy even finish a scrapbook before you Louds come calling?"

"You called him here?!" Lori turned livid.

Lincoln pushed himself free and gasped for air while Ryan sneered at the teen.

"Lori, it's not wh-"

"Yup, the L-man called me over." Ryan shrugged his shoulders. "Got a problem with that, tutzy?"

Lincoln ducked behind the older boy as Lori yelled at them at the top of her lungs.

"YES I HAVE! YOU'RE NOT WELCOME HERE!"

Lincoln cringed at the volume of her voice, but Ryan was unfazed by the storm of spit that assaulted his face and grabbed his cap from being blown off.

He placed it back on and calmly wiped his face with his shirt as Lori loomed over him.

"You're mistaken, Blondy. I`m a very close personal friend of at least four of you Louds. I`m more than welcome." Ryan quipped before looking over his shoulder at Lincoln.

"Lemme guess? The big, blond bully has been threatening you and you need my protection?"

"Who are you calling a bully!"

"Oh, don't flatter yourself. Every human being`s a bully at heart. You ain't nothing special." Ryan brushed her off.

"Look, Lori. He`s not here to bother you." Lincoln spoke up, trying to ease the situation. "Will you just calm down and let us go to my room?"

"What?! No, no, no, no, no!" Lori responded flippantly. "There's no way I`m letting that thing roam our house! Not tonight!"

"Ughhhh..." Bobby groaned as he walked to her side. "What hit me?" he groaned dumbly before seeing Ryan and promptly yelping in horror and stumbling back.

Ryan`s eyes widened. "Roberto Santiago? What a small world." he recognized the teen and grew a sinister grin.

"Why, buenas dias, amigo. And who might you be?"

"You stay away from Bobby!" Lori stepped in between them.

"Bobby?" Ryan sniggered at the nickname.

"Eh, Lori..." an uneasy Bobby tapped his girlfriend`s shoulder "...wh..who's that kid?"

Lori turned nervous as she faced him and started sweating.

"Him?" she chuckled awkwardly. "Oh, don't mind him, sweetiekins! He`s just some hobo Lynn and Lincoln befriended!"

"Sweetie-what-now?" Ryan snickered and turned to Lincoln. "Are those two an item?"

"...eh yes?" Bobby answered cluelessly.

"That`s not your business!" Lori snapped.

Ryan let out a pitying chuckle and shook his head at Bobby.

"You`re dating her? Oh, I so feel for ya, bro. Some people dodge a bullet, but you? You poor sap, you took a straight up kill shot to the head."

"Wut?" Bobby scratched his head, while Lori fumed like an active volcano.

Lincoln grabbed Ryan`s arm. "Will you stop provoking her? You're making things worse!" he whispered to him.

"Wut?" Ryan shrugged innocently. "I`m just sympathizing with another man`s plight."

Unbeknownst to them, Leni appeared behind them, carrying a snack bowl, and grew excited upon seeing Ryan.

Lori gritted her teeth. "Now listen here, you little stain!"

"Ryan! You're back!" Ryan turned paler than usual upon hearing that voice. He turned around and to his horror saw Leni running up to him, arms wide open.

Growing scared, Ryan grabbed Lincoln and pulled him up as a human shield.

"You! No! Stay away from me!" Ryan yelled while sweating bullets. A confused Leni stopped in her tracks.

"Will you let me go!" Lincoln complained and squirmed. Ryan put him down but didn't release him from his grip as he needed a barrier between him and Leni.

"What`s wrong, Ryan? You look like you`ve seen a monster" Leni asked innocently before gasping. "OMG! Do I have split ends?! I do look like a monster!"

Still holding Lincoln in front of him, a perplexed Ryan stared at her before narrowing his eyes. "Alright, what's your game, Smiley? And don't you dare hug me again!"

"Game? Well, we were just playing twister down below..."

Ryan grew even more confused. He didn't know much about this particular Loud sister, but from his brief, previous encounter with her, he could only assume that she was playing some sort of elaborate trick on him. Why was she acting so nice? What was she trying to gain from the stupid act?

"Leni, will you stay out of this! Let me handle the dweebs!" Lori snapped at her.

"Will you drop the stupid act." Ryan sneered at Leni. "I don't know what you're trying to accomplish, chicky, but your facade isn`t working!"

"What`s a facade?" Leni scratched her head.

Ryan narrowed his eyes. "You're good, I`ll give you that."

"What are you talking about?" Lincoln lamented. "Leni`s not trying to do anything to you."

"Enough!" Lori yelled, silencing everyone.

She grabbed Bobby`s arm and pulled him closer.

"Ow! Ow! That hurts, Lori!" he cried as she squeezed his arm in her tight grip.

"Bobby! Go mingle with the other guests and let me handle this!" Lori ordered him.

"Um, okay. Whatever you wish, babe." Bobby agreed obediently before Lori pushed him away from the group and he stumbled towards Chaz, who removed the rope and let him in.

"Guests?" Ryan quickly put two and two together as he saw the bouncer and finally noticed the music.

"So that's what's going on?" he let go of Lincoln and elbowed him.

He smirked and waggled his finger at Lori. "Naugty, naughty, Laurel. Somebody is breaking the rules."

Leni covered her mouth. "Oh no! Lori, you can't be naughty. You won't get presents for Christmas!"

Ryan glared at her in disbelief. "What's this crazy chick trying to do?"

"Pipe down, Leni!" Lori told her impatiently before turning to Ryan.

"And as for you! I want you out of my house right now!"

Ryan tilted his head with a small smirk. "Blondy, you're seriously not in a position to make demands." he said coolly.

"Yes, I am! I`m in charge when mom and dad are away!"

Ryan chuckled sinisterly. "Indeed you are. But if memory serves, your old man didn't give you permission to party it up tonight. Am I right, Lincaronie?" he turned to the younger boy.

"No, he didn't." Lincoln mustered up the courage to confirm it.

"Yup, which is why we have leverage over you, Blondy." Ryan sent Lori an evil smile. "You make me leave and I`m snitching on you."

"What? You wouldn't dare!" Lori growled.

Ryan let out a long, dry chuckle. "You have no idea how daring I am, sweetcakes."

"Oh, Lori doesn't eat sweet cakes. They are full of cholesterol." Leni said helpfully.

Ryan ignored her and continued. "If you honestly think that I`m scared of you then you`ve stuck your head into one of those hair dryer machines one too many times."

Lori was at a loss for words before narrowing her eyes. "You're blackmailing me?" she growled.

Ryan shrugged. "Blackmail is such an ugly word. Try thinking of it as a business proposition. You let me stay and I promise that I won't rat you out."

Lori glowered at him angrily when another of her friends came in. Before the girl could say a word Ryan greeted her with a twisted smile.

"Hey, hot stuff. You joining this quarantine party too?"

The girl froze and stared at the sickly-looking boy before screaming her head off and running away.

"Wait, Jackie! Come back!" Lori called after her before deflating.

She realized that she had to negotiate with this psychopath if she didn`t want to risk putting her party in jeopardy.

Ryan whispered to Lincoln, "She`ll be ready to bargain in three...two...one..."

Lori angrily turned to the boys. "Okay, Lincoln! What the hell do you and your creepy friend want from me to get you off my back!"

Ryan nudged him and Lincoln braced himself. "Just let Ryan stay and nothing more."

Lori gave him a scrutinizing glare. "That's all?" she asked skeptically.

"That is all?" Lincoln replied simply.

"Fine!" Lori clenched her fists and started leaving but quickly stopped and looked over her shoulder.

"But if I see either of you anywhere near my guests I will kill you, slowly and painfully. Got it!" she said coldly.

"I`m wetting myself." Ryan quipped wryly.

Lori ignored him and continued walking. "C`mon, Leni!"

"Lori gets so high-spirited when it comes to parties." Leni marveled cluelessly before looking at the boys.

"And you don't need to be shy around me, Ryan. You know you're always welcome here." she told him sweetly.

"Drop the nice girl routine, will ya! It's so fake." Ryan scoffed at her and folded his arms. "You can't trick a master of trickery."

"What are you talking about?" Lincoln looked at him oddly.

Leni giggled. "I`m not good with tricks, actually. Doing magic shows is more Luan`s thing."

Ryan muttered under his breath. This chick really wasn't budging.

"You`re not gonna give up until I believe that you're some genuine Mary Sunshine, are ya?" Ryan snorted. "Well, good luck with that."

"You think Leni is pretending to be nice to pull your leg?" Lincoln finally realized what Ryan was thinking and was dumbstruck.

"I don't think, I know." Ryan told him confidently.

"You're freaking serious? That`s ridiculous! Leni doesn't have a malicious bone in her body!"

"And how would you know?" Ryan snorted.

"Maybe cuz I`m her brother!" Lincoln replied irritably. Was Ryan messing with him or was he really that paranoid that he would come to such an absurd conclusion?

"Did I say something wrong?" Leni grew worried, not understanding why Lincoln became angry.

"No, Leni, you didn't. It's...it`s just...ugh..." Lincoln tried to explain but quickly deflated.

"It`s just that I can see through your mask, Smiley." Ryan smirked at her.

"Mask? Oh, dear. Luna and Lori never told me this was a costume party?"

Ryan`s face fell. "This broad is one persistent troll. She`s starting to get to me."

"I don't have time for this." he rolled his eyes and turned to Lincoln. "Where's Lynn anyway?"

"You didn't know?" Leni smiled and shrugged. "She left with Margo a few hours ago. The Royal Woods Squirrels have a big softball game out of town tonight."

Ryan`s jaw dropped. "Crazy-hot-chick-say-what-now?"

"It`s true. Her bus probably won't return before tomorrow." Lincoln confirmed, savoring the moment of seeing Ryan slack-jawed.

"Aw, I know you must be disappointed, but you two lovebirds will reunite soon." Leni kneeled in front of him. "Besides, you now have the chance to spend some boy time with Linky."

Lincoln grew nauseous at the remark, as did Ryan.

"Whoopty-doo." Ryan deadpanned with a bitter frown.

His bitterness was entirely lost on Leni.

"I know how you feel about Lynn being away." she said compassionately and pointed at the bouncer.

"You see Chaz over there..." she whispered to the boys "...he can't attend the party because of his duty, and I`m really bummed about it cuz I think he`s super-duper cute!"

"You find that fattso cute?" Ryan asked incredulously. Leni nodded.

Ryan sneered condescendingly. "Now I know you're yanking my chains."

Leni blinked. "Chains?"

"LENI! WILL YOU GET THE HELL DOWN HERE!"

She rose up quickly upon hearing Lori`s voice. "Uh, sorry, guys, but I`m needed. You kids have fun!" she hastily apologized and rushed downstairs.

"This is quite something." Ryan told Lincoln with a hint of disgust. "If there's one thing I hate, it's a lousy liar."

"Are you kidding me?" Lincoln got defensive. "Leni was just being nice to you and acted like a jerk to her."

Ryan huffed smugly. "So you're in on her scheme too? Whatever it is."

Lincoln went agape."Are you really that paranoid, Taylor?"

"I`m a realist, pipsqueak." Ryan smirked. "There ain't no way that Leslie chick is so nice that she would welcome someone like me with open arms. I can only assume that she`s got you fooled too with her nice girl act."

Lincoln was about to counter that when Lucy finally approached them.

"Ryan." she greeted him timidly.

The boy looked at her and his mood immediately improved. At least there was one friendly face left in this house.

"Spooky..." he kneeled down to her level "...how`s my favorite little witch?"

She smiled."Good, will you stay for the night?"

Ryan pondered about it and shrugged. "I don't see why not. I loves me a slumber party."

Lincoln muttered under his breath while Lucy did something unexpected. She hugged Ryan.

It was a surprise to him, but he enjoyed the gesture and smiled.

Lincoln rolled his eyes, feeling slightly envious.


Luckily for the boys, Lucy had no problem with their intentions to sabotage the party. As far as she was concerned, Lori had it coming, and Lincoln was the only sibling Lucy thought she could rely on. If he thought something was the right thing to do she had nothing but faith in his judgment.

So there was no need for secrecy around her. And they could also use her and Lynn`s room as a base for the moment.

"Since when did Lynn have some softball game this week? She would have told me!" Ryan lamented as he paced through the room.

He stopped and made an exasperated groan. "Is this some contrived plot contrivance so I`ll be forced to bond with you?" he pointed at Lincoln, who was sitting on Lynn`s bed.

"It`s not..." Lincoln replied tiredly"...Lynn tends to forget to charge her phone or check her messages, plus she's been gone with you twice this week. And she's on so many teams she can never keep track of everything."

"And why would she ditch us at a time like this?" Ryan pointed out.

"Lynn never walks away on her team, plus I only learned about Lori`s intentions after Lynn left. She didn't know."

"Unbelievable..." Ryan rolled his eyes "...she`s off swinging her bat while I`m stuck with her dorky little brother to babysit her family."

Lincoln ignored the remark and remained focused. "I don't like it either, believe me. But I wouldn't worry about bonding tonight. I have a gut feeling that this will be the least of our worries tonight."

"Either way, this party came so suddenly. I have no idea what we can do about this-"

"Why my dear pipsqueak, you insult me." Ryan smirked and pointed at himself. "This will be a walk in the park for us. After all, repulsing people is this guy`s specialty."

"If you want to get rid of the party guests, I might have a solution."

Ryan jumped in fright as Lucy appeared behind him and clutched his chest. "How do you do that?"

Lucy showed them a book. "This is great grandma Harriet`s spell book, we can use one of its spells to drive away the adolescent invaders."

The boys exchanged confused glances.

"Lucy...I kinda doubt those spells will work." Lincoln tried to let her down gently. "I mean...eh did you ever try using one before?"

"I was saving them for emergencies, and it's pretty simple. You just need to recite one of the spells..." the goth cleared her throat and started reading.

"Lizard's leg and howlet's wing, bring vengeance with an itchy sting!"

She stopped and closed the book. "I just cursed them all with the worst itching imaginable. They`ll be screaming and running away in droves."

The three stood there in silence for a minute, with only the sound of a chirping cricket being heard.

"Any minute now." Lucy assured them confidently.

"Eh, maybe we should look for an alternative solution." Ryan suggested to her when they heard someone else clearing her throat and tapping her foot.

They looked and saw an angry-looking Luan standing behind Lucy, with her hands on her hips, glaring at Ryan.

"Oh look who finally decided to show up." she addressed him with bitter sarcasm.

Ryan looked awestruck at the sight of her and wolf whistled.

"Glad I did, cuz someone looks stunning."

Luan`s face flushed red and she started giggling and fidgeting in a flustered manner.

"Aw shucks...you really think so-" she stopped and shook her head before returning to her angry demeanor.

"No! You're not sweet-talking yourself out of this!" she tried to stay focused and marched up to him.

Lucy stepped out of the way as Luan came face to face with Ryan.

"Do you know how much you've upset me!"

"Upset you?" Ryan stepped back.

"Luan, please. Not now." an exasperated Lincoln groaned.

"You didn't call me for almost forty-eight hours, nor did you answer any of my messages!"

"You sent me messages?" Ryan smiled sheepishly and shrugged. "I haven`t had time to check my phone. Y`see, I`ve spent the last day and so with Lucy and Lynn..."

"Lynn?!" Luan boiled inwardly. "That shameless, boyfriend-stealing cow!"

"...and Lynn and I spent hours playing basketball and then wrestling and I lost track of time with all the fun we`ve been having."

Luan`s eyes started twitching and she trembled with barely concealed rage.

Lincoln stepped in and pulled Ryan back by the arm. "Luan, please. We`re talking about something important right now."

Luan completely ignored him and forced a smile. "Wrestling, huh? I`m glad you were having fun." she replied through clenched teeth before calming down.

"If Lynn keeps being so painfully unromantic maybe I got nothing to worry about." she concluded and wrapped her arms around Ryan and started playing with his hair.

The boy grew hot, started sweating and his heart started thumping rapidly as Luan`s face was just inches away from his.

"But enough about that, you did miss me, right? Right!" she asked sweetly.

Ryan gulped while blushing. "Missed you?" he blurted dumbly.

Luan started scowling and he gently pushed her away, but she wouldn't release her grip.

"Of course I missed you. Things are never as funny when you're not around." he said nervously.

Luan`s face lit up instantly and she embraced him. "Aw, you say the sweetest things. I can't stay mad at you, snookums!"

"Snookums?" Lincoln threw up a bit into his mouth while Lucy shuddered and covered her ears.

Ryan barely registered what she had said as he grew increasingly light-headed from her embrace.

Luan moved her head back and stared him in the eye dreamily. "Lucy? Lincoln? Would you mind leaving us alone for a bit?" she requested from her younger siblings.

"What? No!" Lincoln spoke up and moved in between the two to push them apart.

"I need him right now!" he told Luan sternly before grabbing Ryan by the shoulder and shaking him. "Get a grip on yourself!"

"Wut?" Ryan shook his head. "What happened?"

"Lincoln? What gives?" Luan scolded him. Lincoln didn't budge.

"We were in the middle of an important discussion."

"What discussion?" Luan questioned.

"To sabotage Lori`s party and get rid of her guests."

"What?" Luan turned to the goth.

"Lucy!" Lincoln blurted irritably.

"What? Wouldn't Luan want to join us?" Lucy shrugged. "They cast her out too, like a witch from the village. I don't understand why? She's a teenager too."

"I wasn't cast out!" the comedian got defensive. "They just needed someone to babysit you guys...and...and I`m good with children."

"Sounds more like a flimsy excuse than a real reason." Lucy replied dryly.

"Might as well play along." Lincoln deflated. "Lucy`s right, Luan. I was there and you know it yourself. They just guilt-tripped you so they could get rid of you and shirk their duties at the same time."

"Yeesh." Ryan grimaced. "That's cold."

Luan turned quiet with embarrassment.

"The way I see it, you, me and Lincoln are all on the same page." Lucy pointed out to the comedian.

"Exactly, and it's not like they should be having this party in the first place. Dad said no." Lincoln added and elbowed Ryan.

"Yeah, they cast you out of a party? Luan Loud? Fun and joy personified? The very life of any party lucky enough to have her in its vicinity?" Ryan feigned disbelief.

"Now that's some petty, vindictive BS if I`ve ever seen any."

After a moment of silence, Luan clenched her fists. "Alright, I want in!"

"That`s the spirit, Lu!" Ryan cheered her.

Lincoln smiled and patted her shoulder. "You have any ideas to contribute?"

"Oh, I`ve been pondering about vengeance ever since we went to Pop-Pop! I thought up at least a dozen revenge pranks!" she stated spitefully.

The others took a step back, being reminded of how scary Luan could get when she was pissed off.

Ryan found that side of her strangely attractive.

"Eh, right?" Lincoln replied tentatively. "But let's not try anything too extreme. There are a lot of innocent civilians down there."

"And where's the fun in that?" Ryan countered snidely.

"We just have to get them to leave. The girls will be upset about it either way. We don't need to start a scene." Lincoln pointed out.

"Ew! Lana! You're disgusting!" Lola`s voice echoed from another room.

"Ah crap. What's going on now?" Lincoln bemoaned and walked up to the door frame to see where Lola was.

"Oh, no." Luan realized. "I can't leave the twins and Lisa unguarded."

Unable to spot her, Lincoln came back. "You`re right. Any of them could cause big trouble if left alone." he agreed worriedly.

"No, problem." Ryan shrugged. "We just need some rope and duck tape and find a nice comfy closet for them, then we can focus on being party poopers."

The siblings all stared at him oddly. A silence ensued until Luan started snickering.

"Good one, Ryan!" she slapped his arms playfully. "For a second there I thought you were being serious!"

Ryan looked confused by her reaction. "Who said I was kidding?"

Lincoln facepalmed. "We`re not tying them and locking them up, Ryan!"

Ryan snorted. "You have a better suggestion?"

"We just have to keep them all in one place where one of us can keep an eye on them."

Lola`s deafening screech for attention cut trough, making everyone cringe as she stormed in.

"Lori! Luna! Anyone!" the princess halted and glared at Lincoln.

"Agh! Not you, you big bully!" she spat at him angrily before turning her gaze at Luan.

"What`s going on?" Lincoln asked her but was ignored.

"Aghhh! Not you either!" she snapped at the comedian with even more disgust and kicked her in the shin. Luan yelped in pain.

"Stop it! What's going on!" Lincoln grabbed her by arm but Lola pulled it free.

"Let go of me! Where's everyone else!" Lola demanded and stomped her foot.

"Will you tell us what's going on, you little brat ?" Luan asked angrily while clutching her aching shin.

"You don't deserve to know anything!" Lola retorted to her before laying her eyes on Ryan and gasping in horror.

"Ryan! You disgusting zombie!" she scowled. "I should have known!"

"Eh..do I know you?" the boy shrugged with a teasing smirk.

Lola cried with rage and started hitting him with both fists. Ryan wasn't remotely fazed and slowly looked back up at the others.

"Mind filling me in on the reasons behind the royal pains current hissy fit?" he asked sarcastically.

"You got Lana sick, you filthy creep!" Lola kept pounding on him until her fists started hurting and she stepped back whimpering.

"What do you mean Lana`s sick?" Lincoln turned wide-eyed, as did the other sisters.

Lola growled and glared back at him. "Why don't you see it yourself! Where are the others!"

"Partying down below, no one under fourteen is invited." Lucy explained monotonously.

Lola looked scandalized. "What?! How dare those jerks not invite me!" she whined only for Lincoln to grab her shoulder.

"Forget that!" he told her sternly. "Wha's wrong with Lana!"


Once she cooled down, Lola belligerently led the four to Lisa`s room.

They found the genius sitting at her desk and looking into a microscope, next to her bed was a small curtain conceling something.

"What`s going on here, Lisa?" Lincoln asked.

Before he could get an answer, a red fox toy in a purple jacket waddled up to them. The kids, minus Lucy, all felt creeped out by the rectus grin permanently frozen on its plastic face.

"Lisa? Your creepy puppet is staring at me again!" Lola whined irritably.

Lucy on the other hand smiled. "I like him. He has the smile of a serial killer."

The five all jerked back as the fox`s eyes shot a red beam at them and scanned them from head to toe.

"Identifying subjects. Luan Loud. Lincoln Loud. Lucy Loud. Lola Loud. Master`s intellectually inferior biological relatives. Subject number five unidentified." the toy emitted a monotonous, but otherwise very pleasant tenor, in sharp contrast to his original childish-sounding voice.

"Did that thing just scan us?" Ryan asked the others.

"Did it call me stupid!" Lola fumed and balled her fists.

Lisa turned around, revealing that she was wearing long rubber gloves and a surgical mask. She jumped off her chair and approached them.

"Family. It's fortune that you have arrived because we might be facing an impending crisis."

"Crisis?" Luan blurted. "What crisis? Where's Lana?"

"Behind the curtains." Lisa simply gestured at it and they heard faint moaning.

"But I would advise you all to keep a distance from her, as I have reason to believe that our sister might have turned into a walking bio-hazard."

"Hey! Up here!" Ryan raised his hand up to gain her attention and promptly pointed at the fox. "What`s with the fun-sized Five Nights at Freddy's reject with eye beams?"

"Fenton? He`s of little relevance. " Lisa replied plainly. "He`s was a worthless toy which I have renovated into my personal lab flunky."

"If I wasn't mechanical. My feelings would be hurt." Fenton responded robotically. The kids all blinked at him.

"Fenton, would you kindly show our guests the patient." Lisa ordered him stoically.

"Yes, master." the fox waddled ahead and stretched one arm out to grab the curtains.

Ryan huffed and whispered to Luan. "We never had toys like that when I was a toddler. You Americans get all the good stuff."

"We don't. Lisa really did build that thing." she told him.

"Huh? That little stinker might be more interesting than I thought." Ryan mused, looking at Lisa.

Fenton pulled back the curtains, revealing Lana strapped to a small operating table. She was sickly-pale, her eyes were bloodshot, her upper lip was covered with dried up mucus trails and she was moaning with a thermometer sticking out of her armpit.

Lincoln, Luan and Lucy all went agape.

"She looks a little pale around the gills." Ryan grimaced.

Fenton used his extendable arm to retrieve the thermometer.

"Master Lisa. Subject`s bodily temperature is off the scale."

"Payp...ugh...duwn...stupid..." Lana moaned incoherently in a raspy voice, barely able to raise her head. She got cut off by her own coughing.

"As I predicted it would be." the genius noted stoically.

"Lisa, what happened to her?" Lincoln lamented as he watched the horrible state the tomboy was in.

"I theorize that she must have picked up some form of virus while we were visiting grandfather." Lisa continued as she walked towards her desk.

"A nursing home is a notorious cesspool of diseases, and Lana is well-known for her habit of coming in contact with and even consuming objects that most sensible people would avoid." she elaborated while picking up a small glass slide from her microscope.

"I dunn...nod...egghadd..." Lana moaned irritably but her head soon collapsed down again.

"And given the plethora of symptoms that she's exhibiting..." Lisa continued with a straight face as she placed the slide on a platform that came out of Fenton`s belly "... rhinorrhoea, fever, coughing, throat pain, I have strong reason to believe that she has contracted the influenza virus."

"The flue?!" Lincoln blurted fearfully. His sisters gasped and hid behind him.

"The poor thing." Luan said meekly.

"What about us?" Lola complained. "I don't want to get the flue in summer!"

"Flue?" Ryan stepped back and glared at Lincoln. "You said nothing about catching diseases!"

"Will you chill, she can't possibly have the flue!" Lincoln argued nervously.

"The blood sample I was studying should clear things up." Lisa explained calmly. "Fenton! Analyze!"

Fenton retracted the platform and his eyes soon started flashing red.

"Data analyzed. Subject is carrying the influenza virus. Handle with extreme caution."

The siblings started to panic. Lola screamed and ran away.

"Luan. You and Lucy find her and calm her down. We`ll handle Lana." Lincoln told the comedian.

"Alright, just be careful." Luan nodded and took the goth to find Lola.

Lincoln looked back at Lana and his heart sank. This couldn't be for real. Not only was Lori holding an unauthorized party, but Lana was carrying a contagious disease.

He felt awful for his little sister watching her squirm and moan, but there was an even bigger issue now with her being a living bio-hazard to every person in this house. And there were lots of them tonight.

"So, what should we do with the squirt, smarty pants?" Ryan asked Lisa.

"What we need to do is quarantine patient zero immediately. The hazard must be contained at all costs." Lisa explained to them.

Ryan looked back at Lana and rolled his eyes. "Well, now I feel like that quarantine joke I made earlier is in bad taste."


Wearing long gloves and a surgical mask himself, Ryan kicked open the door to the twins room and walked in while carrying Lana, holding her at an arm's length away from him.

"Lincoln..." she moaned and coughed, causing Ryan to jerk his head back.

"...willl...ya...reed stowy..." she droned before snorting in a huge ball of mucus that was clogging up one of her nostrils.

"Yeah, you're definitely delirious." Ryan commented uneasily and placed her on her bed and pulled her blanket up before swiftly jerking back.

Lana continued moaning and closed her bloodshot eyes as she felt the soft pillow and mattress she was resting on.

Ryan started stepping back. It hurt him to see her in this state but he knew that trying to comfort her would do nothing but endanger himself.

She was too weak to get up, so they had no need to restrain her. Ryan discarded his germ-ridden gloves and threw them to the floor before stepping out to meet Lincoln and Lisa.

"How is she doing?" a worried Lincoln asked him.

"Horribly. How do you think she`s doing?" an irritated Ryan told him bluntly.

"Your willingness to personally transfer patient zero was greatly appreciated." Lisa told him.

"No kidding, short stuff." Ryan replied irritably. "I had to do the legwork cuz you Louds are all chicken."

"I would advise you to wash your arms with hot water just to be certain." Lisa warned him calmly.

Ryan grew a look of horror and rushed to the bathroom.

"If you would do the honor." Lisa handed Lincoln a sign saying "Warning: Quarantine".

He sighed and hung it on the door.

"Now what?"

"After eleven or so days it should be safe to release her again." Lisa told him stoically and walked away with her hands behind her back.

Lincoln hung his head sullenly. He wanted to keep disasters from happening, but now his little sister was quarantined with an infectious disease.

He slapped his forehead. "I should have gone with them! I could have prevented this!"

He exhaled dejectedly and looked back at the door.

"Hang in there, Lana." he thought before walking away. This night had already turned into a disaster.

Unfortunately, he had no idea that the worst was yet to come.


This chapter turned out longer and required more set up than I thought it would need, but on the upside I think I milked more comedy mileage out of this one than any previous chapter, especially in regards to finally showing how Lisa rebuilt Fenton as a robot assistant (or mechanical slave depending on how she will proceed to treat him).

And of course, Ryan believing that Leni is faking her stupidity to achieve some unknown goal. For all of his shrewdness and wariness when dealing with other people, he ironically (and unintentionally) got fooled by the one Loud sibling who is a completely open book and probably doesn't even understand the concept of lying. With his past of being bullied and being a bully, he, of course, expects to see the worst in people and the idea of someone who is unconditionally nice to everyone around them is an implausible fantasy in his mind.

And this is the third time so far Ryan that has broken the fourth wall.

No points for guessing where this story is going. Sufficient to say, it's gonna be a night of terror...