The Wolf You Feed
Chapter 81
Daryl stuck close to the men from Gavin's outpost. They might not be his friends but they were familiar faces in the sea of strangers that was the Sanctuary. Their group had been among the first to start gathering in the great hall. It wasn't really great but from the amount of people that shuffled in after Daryl's group, it was clearly the only area in the Sanctuary large enough to hold them all.
He kept his posture as relaxed as possible. But Daryl's eyes were constantly scanning. Rowan had to be here somewhere. He made it this far. All he needed to make everything worth it was a glimpse of her face.
A flash of dark hair in the crowd caught his eye. Daryl's heart leaped in his chest, beating so hard he wondered if the men around him could hear it. Turn your head. Look at me. The woman stayed facing forward. Daryl was having trouble stopping himself from pushing through the crowd towards her. But then an older man behind the woman stumbled into her. She turned towards Daryl, revealing not Rowan's face but the face of a stranger. Her nose was long and beaklike and her complexion was much darker than Rowan's. Daryl sighed and went back to scanning the crowd.
Torches that were placed in strategic locations around the room were lit. Then the overhead fluorescent lights flicked off. This made it harder for Daryl to see. Firelight flickered over the faces in the crowd, making it harder to distinguish one from the next.
When the rest of the crowd knelt down, Daryl followed their example. He wasn't happy to be on his knees worshiping a madman. But at this point he would have done the hokey pokey in front of Negan if it meant rescuing Rowan from this place.
Negan was making a speech that Daryl was only half listening to. Most of it sounded like puffed up rhetoric. The man was talking about kings and queens and the future of the saviors. In Negan's future the Saviors were going to rule the new world. Daryl fought back the urge to roll his eyes. Not only at Negan's lofty plans for the future but also at how the people around Daryl were lapping them up.
An older couple to Daryl's left were talking to each other in hushed whispers. They were eager to see Negan's new queen. The man had heard she was beautiful. The woman had heard that she had magical powers. Daryl momentarily stopped scanning the crowd. His curiosity got the better of him and he glanced up to get a glimpse of the woman that all the people around him seemed to be whispering about. She was up on the platform. Negan's large body was temporarily blocking Daryl's view of the woman as the man had her in his arms. When Negan stepped back, Daryl felt his stomach bottom out.
Through the ceremonial veil, Rowan's world was one of shimmering gold. Her dress was gold to match the veil and long enough that she had to grip the beaded fabric and lift it up to avoid tripping as she climbed the stairs. Her thoughts were a giant whirling blur in her head. Too much had happened in too short a time. She couldn't even begin to process everything. Right now there was only the sharp feeling of the beads against her fingers as she focused on the steps in front of her. She took them one at a time, grateful that David was next to her with his hand hovering behind her back in case she lost her footing. Even her bodyguard didn't dare touch her now that she belonged to Negan. She was his property.
Rowan could feel the tears coming. She quickly blinked them back, grateful for the miniscule amount of privacy the shimmering lace veil was providing her. Thinking back on it, her life in Alexandria seemed idyllic in comparison to this new existence. Rowan longed for the soft sound of Nokake's humming as she rocked Falcon to sleep. She longed for the low timbre of her father's laughter. And most of all she longed for Daryl's arms around her and the sound of his heartbeat under her head as she drifted off to sleep. Instead she heard the dull roar of the crowd. It was getting louder the closer she got to the platform.
Rowan waited just out of sight. Negan would call her forward when he was ready. The man was standing on the high platform, close to the railing. All his lieutenants were lined up behind him. This now included Eugene, Negan's head engineer. It felt comforting to see at least one friendly face.
Rowan dropped her dress and straightened her back. Her experience at play acting had come in more handy than she would have guessed at the end of the world. If Negan's people wanted a queen then she was going to give him one. Rowan reached up and carefully felt her hair, making sure the combs were still holding the veil securely to her braided crown. Then she put her hands down at her sides. When Negan finished his speech and gestured to her to come forward she took her time, walking as gracefully as possible out to meet the crowd. She let their anticipation build below her. Negan smiled. He had a real flare for drama.
The fire from the torches reflected off the beads on her dress, lighting her up with dancing sparkles. Rowan looked down. The auras of the people below her were a blur of gold. They bowed down before her the moment Rowan took her place at Negan's side. Rowan fought back the bile that was rising in the back of her throat. This was not the version of the new world that she had envisioned being a part of. She was not prepared to be worshiped. She had no desire to be a slave owner. The thought of it made her sick. Rowan swallowed hard and when Negan lifted her veil, a dazzling smile was plastered on her face. She lifted her hand, waving at the peasants below. They didn't wave back. But when Negan pulled her into his arms and kissed her, they exploded with cheers and applause.
Rowan could feel Negan's aura swelling around her, full with the steady flow of adoring energy his followers were feeding him. He reminded Rowan of a tick that was full of blood. A parasite. Sucking as much as it could from its host without regard for the other creature's wellbeing. If she let him, he would suck her dry. He would turn her into an empty shell of herself.
Once Negan had his fill of parading her around out on the platform he turned and led Rowan down the hall. She knew they were having some sort of celebration dinner with all his lieutenants. At least there will be food. Knowing that her attendance was not optional, Rowan resigned herself to what was sure to be an uncomfortable meal for her. It wasn't that she never got odd looks from the people in Alexandria, especially if she was doing something they considered strange. Like talking to animals or turning cartwheels in her front yard. But it was nothing like the predatory stares she got from Negan's people. Especially the men. They made her feel sick inside.
Rowan shuffled along next to Negan, holding her head up high even though she would rather stare down at her freshly painted toes. She smiled a little when she saw Olivia hurrying towards her. Tank was with the woman and quickly overtook her in his hurry to get to Rowan. She leaned down and pet the large dog, relieved to have a reason to pull her hand away from Negan's grip. Glancing up at Olivia, Rowan could tell immediately that something was wrong. The woman was shifting nervously from one foot to the other. Her eyes were wide and she was twisting the hem of her shirt like she was wringing water from a towel.
"You look amazing Roe," Olivia gushed with extremely insincere excitement, "I'm so happy for you! This is so exciting."
Rowan opened her arms, hugging her larger friend tightly against her. She could feel the tension in her body as Olivia's fingers dug into the beaded material of Rowan's dress. Their cheeks touched and she could feel Olivia's hot breath on her ear as the woman whispered a desperate warning to her.
"In there sitting at the table," Olivia hissed, "...Daryl's here!"
