"Have you all gone bonkers! You can't trust her! Throw those things off you!"

Luan's reaction was exactly as they had expected. Lincoln and Lynn had followed Lucy to the attic and persuaded the comedian to come down to her room, assuring her that Kathleen was leaving, after which they briefed her on the most recent accident to have happened in their household.

They were all wearing "Teens of Tomorrow" t-shirts, which were, big shock, meant for middle schoolers, so Lynn's fit her just fine, Lincoln's was slightly oversized, but Lucy's was hanging down to her knees, but luckily, she was used to wearing such baggy clothes.

"You think that hasn't crossed our minds?" Lynn retorted irritably, keeping her eyes away from the stupid propaganda shirt she was forced to wear. "Of course we don't trust her, but unless you didn't get the memo, we're in a tight spot right now."

"We have to pay Renee's hospital bills somehow? And fast. As in, "by the end of the day" fast." Lincoln continued dejectedly. "That's the least we can do for mom and dad once they learn-"

"Have you been listening to me?" Luan said incredulously, sitting on her bed. "It's a con! She won't pay you a penny, it's all just some elaborate ruse to make fools out of you. I speak from experience!"

The others exchanged glances. Lynn and Lucy had their worries that Luan might have a point, but they also agreed with their brother on one thing.

"Luan, we already know that these charity events she's been running are legit. She couldn't possibly have known whether we would hang out with her or even run into her at any point? If this is all an act-"

"It's defiantly an act! She's a master actor and Ms. Bernardo's darling!" Luan argued, with hot tears forming in her eyes. "And she doesn't just use her talents on the stage. Everything about her is fake! Smoke and mirrors! A big illusion-"

"Luan, I believe ya that Kathleen is just doing this stuff to save her own skin." Lynn told her. "So does Lucy, and we don't buy that any of her regrets are genuine, but Linc is right on one thing."

"I'm hard-pressed to believe that she would pour all that time and money just to prank you. Be reasonable, Luan. Whether she was forced into it by her father and not, her charity events are by all accounts legit, regardless of her intentions." Lincoln added.

"So? That still gives her all the power in the world to swindle you guys! She can make you do all the hard work and then pay you zilch in the end and make up some cockamamie reason for why she had to dock your pay."

Lynn and Lucy shared Luan's sentiment and it was a constant worry in the back of their minds. Lincoln wasn't sure himself how much he could trust Kathleen, but he couldn't let his paranoia get in the way of their one chance to mend this mess Lola had caused.

"Luan, I don't see what she would have to gain from swindling us? She is filthy rich after all." he shrugged, having already made up his mind.

"To be spiteful!" Luan spat. "That's what! Nothing makes her happier than being spiteful!"

Lynn massaged her forehead and grumbled, "I don't want to believe you, but I can't help but do."

"Then why are you still going along with it?!"

"Lynn, we have no other choice." Lincoln sighed at the jock. "It's either that or-"

"Or don't go! Just say no, it's not that hard to do." Luan ranted and folded her arms. "Mom and dad will be pissed either way, having one less debt to pay won't change any of it. Just let Lola take the fall and move on with it! She pushed Renee out of a window and there's nothing we can do about it unless Lisa invents a time machine or something!"

The others grew awkward at the mentioning of Lisa and "time machine", when the door opened. Ryan entered, likewise wearing a "Teens of Tomorrow" t-shirt and carrying a familiar sack labeled "confiscated".

"No need to thank me." He said in a strained voice and lowered the sack to the floor, before scratching himself and pulling on the shirt. "I've retrieved your phones."

"What's wrong, Ryan? Are you allergic to the fabric?" Luan asked.

"No, but I am allergic to looking like a buffoon." The boy grumbled as he barely held himself back from tearing the t-shirt off his chest. "Oh, the indignity…." He whined melodramatically.

The others were at a loss for words as they looted the sack for their belongings. "How did you find them?" Lynn asked.

"Eh, it was no biggie. Renee always hides things she doesn't want me to find in our parents' room, does the same thing when babysitting." He shrugged and sniggered as he held up a hairpin. "She can't help but follow a strict pattern wherever she goes."

"Where did you find that hairpin?" Lincoln raised an eyebrow, despite his relief at having some means of long-distance communication again.

"Blondy and Blondy's room, where else?" Ryan answered and promptly picked his teeth with it before tossing it away. "I figured we would need to stay in contact if Kathleen's our boss. Can't turn your back on that conniving minks."

"See, he sees it!" Luan spoke up, before realizing the implications behind him also wearing one of those infernal t-shirts.

"Wait? You're going too?" she looked at him, feeling even more betrayed.

"We'll need all the help we can get to rake in the doe to pay Renee's hospital bills." Lynn explained.

"Believe me, Lu, I'm doing this under protest." Ryan felt his skin crawling. He had done some pretty generous things for these guys during this week, but this took the cake. "You guys just remember that you owe me a HUGE favor for agreeing to be some charity stooge."

Lynn rolled her eyes. "Don't be a drama queen, none of us want to do this either."

"We know, Ryan, I just hope you'll be able to control your temper around Lola." Lincoln replied seriously. "We don't need another mishap like-"

"I can behave, but you better tell that rat that if she gives me any more lip, she'll be providing company for Renee at the infirmary in no time." Ryan replied just as seriously before taking off his cap and slicking his hair back to wipe off the sweat.

He tossed it into Luan's hands. "Keep this safe, will ya?"

"Why?"

"Because I don't want people to recognize me, I'll need a disguise of some sort?" he rubbed his chin, while Lincoln rolled his eyes.

"Are you absolutely sure you can handle Lola? With her, we can't promise you no lip?" Lynn warned him in advance.

"Kathleen really likes her. Harming Lola could be all the incentive she needs to withdraw on her promise for payment." Lucy reluctantly added.

Ryan muttered under his breath. "I'll be fine, that outburst before? I just lost my cool from all the stress, it won't happen again."

"What outburst are you talking about?" Luan asked.

"Ryan nearly pummeled Lola for pushing his sister out of the window." Lucy replied, much to Ryan's chagrin. "Unfortunately, Kathleen stopped it."

Luan huffed. "Of course. Figures she would take a shine to Kathy Junior." Lucy sniggered. It was funny because it was true.

"It wasn't because of that! It was because…because that twerp nearly got me killed last night. You all saw it with your own eyes." Ryan insisted adamantly. "There ain't no love lost between me and the bookworm." Now it was Lynn's turn to roll her eyes.

"Ryan, nobody is judging you because of this." Lincoln tried to reason. "As bad as Lola is, I don't think anyone of us would want to see her in a body cast either, you get what I'm saying?"

"Speak for yourself." Lucy muttered.

Ryan fumed. "Will you put a cork in it! This ain't the time to talk about our feewings, I thought we were gonna suck up to Kathleen all day, so you guys won't have to pay a certain someone's hospital bills? Making Kathy wait isn't a good start."

Lincoln turned to Luan. "When he's, he's right. We better get going fast. So I take it you're not coming, Luan?"

"Was I too subtle?" Luan said harshly, folding her arms and carrying a defiant look.

"It wouldn't hurt you to pinch in, y'know?" Lynn placed her hands on her hips. "Entertaining little kids and old people, isn't that right up your alley? You'll probably have a captive audience at the kids' hospi-"

"Lynn, if she doesn't want to go, she won't go." Lucy cut in. "We won't force her into anything. We all know this is hard for her."

"You're right, Lucy. If you don't want to go, Lu, nobody will force you." Lincoln nodded, glancing at the comedian sympathetically.

"This is stupid what you're doing." Luan continued as she turned her back on them. "I'm telling you, you'll rue ever playing her sick little games."

Lincoln sighed and gestured at the door. "Guess that's that, let's go, guys. See you later, Luan."

As he left, Lynn gave one final glance at Luan and followed him, annoyed by the comedian's reluctance to help, but she'd be lying if she said that she didn't understand her reasons. Even she would have needed a long recovery after being smooched by Lyle. The mere thought made her nauseous.

Hearing their footsteps, Luan silently seethed, angry that they were still going through with this, but said nothing. At least their reasons weren't out of any blind trust in Kathleen, unlike certain other sisters of hers.

"We'll miss ya, Lu." Ryan admitted. "We could have used someone with a good sense of humor to get us through this grunt work. Besides me of course, but I'm not gonna feel jokey today."

"You're not seriously still going?" the girl asked with her back still turned on them, hoping against hope.

Ryan exhaled. He really did not want to go. The other stuff he had done with the Louds may have been life-threatening, but this was just degrading. "I really don't want to, but I'd be a lousy pal if I said no. Plus, with my sister being hurt, I could take some heat for it, so better do something to mend the situation."

Luan didn't say anything.

With nothing else to say, Ryan left. As she heard him go, Luan slowly turned to Lucy, who remained there. Luan felt obliged to at least give her some words of wisdom.

"Luce, promise me to watch your back. I know she's up to something."

"I will." The goth nodded. Despite that, she too hoped that Luan was wrong, for all their sakes.

"Sigh. If nothing else, could you go to the nearest pond and catch a frog?"

Luan raised an eyebrow. "What for?"

"To replace Hops." The goth said frankly. "Fenton kind of…..vaporized him last night."


"I'm glad that's over." Lynn Sr. thought as he walked out of the bathroom, having taken a shower and then switched out of his dark suit into his regular attire. Nobody liked going to a funeral except for maybe Lucy, but he was sure she was just being hyperbolic (he hoped at least), but going to one for people you didn't even know was incredibly awkward, as was standing there for hours and trying to start conversations with total strangers and give them your sincerest condolences for their loss.

At least their appearance gave Maria and Bobby some more and much-needed support in their time of grief, and Ronnie, even though Lynn didn't have the fondest opinion of the girl, on account of his only son repeatedly lamenting about her picking on him at school, including shoving jello down his pants. Getting hassled by other boys like Chandler was one thing, but being pushed around by girl was a lot more embarrassing (Lynn could relate from personal experience) even for a boy who couldn't care less about being "manly", not helped by some systemic double standards allowing female bullies to get away with what they do (again, he knew from experience). But he didn't hold that against Ronnie today, not with how clearly devastated she looked, so much that it completely washed away her normal rude attitude.

Lynn was still glad that they came. They did a good thing. Furthermore, if nothing else, the awkwardness of the gathering helped take his mind off that ever-present nagging fear that something was amiss back home. Now that the funeral was over, it came back in full force.

Lynn grabbed his forehead and paced around the small suite. It wasn't much and obviously cheap, just one small living room with a bathroom and a bedroom on the other side, with a bed for two. If her mind hadn't been so preoccupied with Bobby last night, Lori surely would have complained about having to sleep on the couch.

"Don't be so paranoid, Lynn. Everything's okay." He told himself. "It worked out last time. And Renee hasn't called us. The only call we got so far was that voice message about the kids swapping roommates." It occurred to Lynn that he still hadn't given any thought to that.

"Worried, dear?" he jumped at his wife's voice and turned around sharply, holding the left side of his chest as he faced Rita, who had also changed out of her mourning attire.

"Me? Oh, no, honey." He tried to act nonchalant, not that Rita was buying it. "I'm just happy this whole funeral business is-"

"Lynn, I know what you're thinking about." Rita said frankly and sat down on the couch. "I'm thinking about the same thing."

Lynn deflated but tried to stay optimistic. "There is no need to worry. Everything's fine, we even received a message from them telling us that everything is A-okay-"

"Then why do I still have this nagging suspicion that something is terribly wrong." Rita replied, her voice visibly shaking. "Don't act like your parent intuition isn't in overdrive as well."

She wasn't wrong. "Okay maybe….but that's probably just because we've grown accustomed to it." Lynn tried to rationalize it. "There's nothing wrong, surely Renee would have called us?"

"If she's not on life-support in a hospital bed." Rita said grimly, as blunt as ever. Her parent intuition was indeed working remarkably well.

"Rita, isn't that kinda like a worst-case scenario?" Lynn tried to lighten the mood, and failing at it.

"Lynn, I can't help thinking about it, okay?" Rita exhaled, and slumped into the couch. Her husband walked around the coffee table and sat next to her.

"Okay, Rita. Maybe I'm a little….tiny bit worried about the situation back home too." Lynn admitted, fiddling with his fingers.

"Really? I never would have guessed." his wife finally found her sense of humor, if only her sardonic one.

"But remember, when we went out, everything at home turned out alright. And we left Lori in charge? Lori! This time however, we left them in the care of a professional babysitter who is by all accounts a tough customer." Lynn continued, finally getting Rita to give things the benefit of the doubt.

Things did turn out fine the time they left Lori in charge, so why was she so worried about Renee being unable to handle it? Maybe she really has become conditioned to being an eternal pessimist?

"I suppose, but still. If only they had called us once today-"

"They probably will, and tell you that I was right all along. Everything we've heard so far indicates that Renee is doing a marvelous job babysitting the kids, and Lincoln and Lynn probably helped. Between you and me, they pretty much promised that to me."

"I can believe that. Lincoln did seem….oddly considerate about our everyday plight this week. He and Lynn helped me clean the house after….you know what. Just like that, with no prompting, or promise of a reward."

"I know, he also volunteered against going to see ol' Pop-Pop, just to help me clean the garage." Lynn said fondly.

"He did?"

"Oh, yes. Carrying those heavy boxes wasn't easy for him, but he soldiered through, just so I wouldn't have to do it all by myself." The father continued, feeling rather proud of his boy.

"I….I can imagine that, weird though? Lincoln has always been a good kid, but he has never been this attentive…..and Lynn? I was….pretty dumbstruck when she offered to clean the house. Not to mention…." Rita decided not to gossip about their private discussion between women "….some other things I did not expect from her."

Lynn also had some private discussions with his kids. "LJ? Yes, it caught me off-guard too." He decided to open up a little, surely Junior wouldn't mind this, just to alleviate Rita's worries. "Rita, can you keep a secret, at least for now?"

"What secret?" Rita raised an eyebrow.

"Well….I can't entirely explain LJ's new sense of altruism either, but I think it might have something to do with her….eh…growing more self-conscious lately?"

"Self-conscious?" Rita made a look, making her husband blush. He realized that phrasing could be interpreted in a number of ways.

"By which I mean she seems to have realized that she can be…a bit of nuisance….well….okay, a big nuisance, what with her rowdy behavior and penchant for indoor sports." Lynn explained. "I know that, because she literally came up to me and apologized for it, in no uncertain terms."

Rita's eyes widened. "She apologized, you mean she…."

"She acknowledged her faults, apologized and said that she would try to better herself." Lynn nodded. "Scouts honor."

On any other day, Rita wouldn't have believed him for a second. She loved all her children, but she couldn't deny that her sporty middle daughter was huge burden that only grew worse as she entered puberty. And yet, right now, she was entirely ready to believe that seemingly far-fetched claim, on account of personal experience.

After a moment of silence, Rita found her voice. "Um…yeah…I've noticed a change in her behavior too."

"You did? Any idea why?" Lynn inquired, being genuinely curious about it.

Rita honestly didn't know. She knew about her daughter experiencing her first crush, but Ryan was obviously not the kind of kid who would scold others about their bad behavior and by all accounts, he liked Lynn for the exact same reasons Rita would have pegged her as one of her most insufferable and misbehaved children. So Ryan couldn't be the cause of it.

Did something happen to her? Something that opened her eyes? Both parents pondered about that. Perhaps Lincoln figuring out on his own that his mom and dad's lives weren't all sunshine and rainbows as he grew older was possible, he was an insightful boy and all, but Lynn? What could possibly spur a single-minded and headstrong girl like her to make such a drastic change?

"I don't know either. I guess we'll just have to talk to her when we get back." Rita concluded. "Which is just one more reason why we should hit the brakes."

Lynn sighed. Apparently, one night out where the kids managed not to cause any trouble wasn't enough to build confidence, especially with Luan's most recent Prankmageddon still being so fresh in their minds. And honestly, he saw no reason why they shouldn't pack their things and hit the road.

"You make a good point, we have no reason to stay here any longer." he agreed. As much as staying in a quiet and tranquil home had been a refreshing change of pace for both of them, neither of them could get themselves to relax long enough to enjoy it, their anxiety won out every time. They couldn't stop thinking about their children back home. And the longer they stayed, the more would Renee charge them.

"You read my mind." Rita nodded before glaring at the door. "Where is Lori anyway?"

"Probably with Bobby, we can't rush her now." Lynn defended his eldest daughter. "While we wait, how about we discuss that whole request about switching roommates?"

"Oh, that?" Rita had forgotten about it. "Have you given it any thought?"

"Well, I have now that you mention it. Personally, I see no harm in it. Actually, it might help improve things at home. In hindsight, perhaps arbitrarily pairing up our daughters based on birth order alone was not the smartest choice."

Hearing that, a little smile tugged Rita's lips. It did sound poorly-conceived when said like that, but the two of them were so overwhelmed with their usual duties, that quaint and trivial things like that hardly crossed their minds.

"I see no problem with it either." Rita shrugged, agreeing with him. "There are probably better options as far as which two of our daughters should share a room."

"Remember, Lincoln sent us a message. It seems they've discussed it themselves. And everyone seems on board with it." Lynn reminded her, further trying to prove that things were running smoothly back home, despite his personal doubts.

"Yes, though I must say, some of the pairings surprised me."

"Tell me about. I mean, Lynn and Lana? That makes too much sense. And Leni apparently doesn't want to part ways with Lori? I'm not gonna argue with that. But Lucy and Luan? And Lola and Lisa? On their own free will?"

Rita was surprised by it too, but did have some insight on the first odd paring. "Well, if Lynn's to be believed, Luan and Lucy have been getting "chummy" lately. I don't know how, but that's what Lynn said. It seems they found some common ground, somehow?"

"Really?" Lynn scratched his head. "Well, if that's what they wish, who am I to deny them? I doubt anyone's going to clamor for either one of them to be their roommates, so if they are content with each other, I guess that solves one problem."

Pairing up the tomboys or the traditionally feminine ones was the easy part. It was the oddballs who would be hard-pressed in finding a compatible roommate.

"I guess it does, but Lola and Lisa? How did that one happen?"

"I don't know, Rita. I kinda get the feeling that Lisa simply drew the short straw."

"I can't imagine that Lisa wouldn't speak her mind about something like that? And what about Luna?"

Obviously, Luna and Lisa didn't have anything in common, but why would the young genius choose the spoiled princess over the mild-mannered musician whose own roommate had ditched her? Did rock n roll music just really mess with Lisa's contemplation?

"It is weird, I guess that topic warrants further discussion." Lynn shrugged, still rather apprehensive about letting Lola stay with Lisa, for multiple reasons.

Unfortunately, they both knew that nobody would want Lola as their roommate, and while Lisa and Luna might theoretically find a way to work things out as roommates, giving Lola her own room? That would surely spoil her. And she was spoiled enough as it was. This defiantly required further discussion.

"So what's our stance? Lynn and Lana have our approval, and so do Luan and Lucy, if they really are serious about it?" Rita asked.

Lynn thought about it. "That would seem to be the case, honey. I don't know about you, but I'm dying to find out the reasons behind some of these pairings. That will be one long family meeting."

Rita frowned a bit. "And if we're going to have a meeting this soon, this would the perfect time to bring up another pressing matter?"

Lynn's face faltered and he fidgeted. "Rita….do I really have to go through with that?"

"Yes." Was her blunt response.

"But….it feels so unfair and…extreme, don't you think?"

"Lynn, that restaurant is going to be our income, not to mention it's your dream. Do you want it to be a success or do you want it to go out in flames within its first week?"

Lynn couldn't argue with that logic. "I really want it to be a success. I've worked so long to make it a reality."

"I know that, dear." Rita said more gently. "Which is why you're going to have to make some sacrifices, no business can flourish without sacrifices."

Lynn's voice trailed off. They had spent the entire ride here talking about this topic. Not that it helped ease him into the idea any bit.

"So our kids are prohibited from ever setting foot there?"

"I'm not proud of that decision either, but it's a necessary evil." Rita nodded, her face betraying that she too had not made this decision easily, but with her husband getting cold feet as usual, she had to step up. Lynn's restaurant was no idle dream anymore, now it was going to be a reality and a source of income.

"I wish it didn't have to be like this….." Lynn shook his head. "And that means everyone, right?"

Rita just nodded again. Lynn felt very crummy about this. He would have to banish his own children from his restaurant, even Lincoln and Junior, despite how helpful they've been to him. But he couldn't go around playing favorites now. That would just make his children despise him even more once he broke the news to them.

"And what are we going to tell them? Remember, we've recited it plenty?" Rita reminded him.

"Never mix family and work, it's a recipe for disaster, it's one of the first things they teach you in any business school. There are 25 golden rules why mixing-"

"That's enough, you remember it." Rita held her hand up. "That will give us plausible deniability."

Lynn exhaled, still feeling scummy about it.

"I will obey that rule as well, after all, I am also part of this family, so I should not be exempt from it." Rita reassured him. Never visiting her husband's restaurant was a small price to pay in order to keep their family's income stable and running.

Lynn smiled a little. His wife was devoted. Hopefully, he would prove to her that he too was devoted and that he had the spine to be devoted. It was easier said than done though, and Lynn couldn't deny that for all his efforts, Rita was unquestionably the one wearing the pants in this relationship.

Right then the door opened, and the Louds' eldest daughter came in, still wearing her black mourning gown. She didn't seem happy or sad, she simply wore a neutral expression.

"Hey, mom, dad."

"Lori, I assume you've been with Bobby?" Rita asked.

"Yes." Lori sighed.

"You've been comforting him?"

Lori frowned a little. "Duh, literally what did you think we were doing?"

"Is his family back with the Casagrandes?" Lynn asked. The teen just nodded.

Lynn rubbed his neck. "Well, me and Rita were hoping to say goodbye in person, but I guess we'll have to do it via phone call."

"What?" Lori asked incredulously, quickly getting the implications.

"Pack your stuff, Lori. We're leaving in an hour." Her mother confirmed.

"What? Are you joking?"

"I'm afraid not, sweetie." Lynn shook his head. "It's high time we go home and check on Lincoln and the girls."

"What for? It's not like we heard any news of them causing trouble?"

"Yet." Rita replied.

"Pffffttt…..what's the worst thing that could have happened?" Lori shrugged, not taking her parents' concerns very seriously.

"Are you joking now?" Rita asked flatly.

"You think they're planning to rob some place? Or that they're being chased by wild animals? Or maybe zombies? Get real, mom."

"Very funny, Lori…." Rita deadpanned. "I think we've left them to their own devices long enough."

"Mom, quit being a worrywart. You left them with me literally two days ago and everything turned out fine. And now you've got this expensive, so-called master babysitter."

"And how exactly did you keep them in line?" Rita enquired. Upon that question, Lori drew a blank. She really couldn't remember much about that night, expect her peers sending her a ton weird messages the next day about how her "prank" wasn't funny at all.

"Well…..I….."

"A happy accident?" Rita suggested, making Lori frown indignantly.

"Your mother is right, Lori. We've been gone long enough, time to head back home."

Lori looked uneasy but then calmed down. "Fine, you guys go, but I'm staying. I'll catch up with you in due time, with my new ride. You can understand why."

"No, Lori." Rita tried to be gentle. "We are all going home."

Lori couldn't believe the woman's audacity. "You want me to bail on Bobby? Now? When he's-"

"No, sweetie. We don't mean that." Lynn tried to ease the tension. "You were there for him when he needed you the most. But right now, he and his family need some time to mourn in peace. We would only be intruding on it."

"Yes, and as your father said, we need to check on your siblings, I can't rest thinking that they might be up to something." Rita added, but was totally ignored.

"Intruding?" Lori made a face. "I'm his girlfriend? The love of his life! Who the hell would possibly be more important to him in his time of grief than me!"

"His mother? His sister?" Rita answered.

"Are you pulling my leg? That little brat Ronnie couldn't possibly comfort him. She barely wants anything to do with him and when she does say something to him, it ain't nice."

"Is that why they were holding hands the entire time while standing next to the-"

"Dad, be reasonable? Bobby needs me right now, I can't just ditch him after a day." Lori pointed at herself. "How could you and mom be so heartless?"

"Lori…" Rita massaged her forehead. "If we allowed you to stay, where would you sleep? You've seen the Casagrandes apartment? There's barely any room to accommodate Maria and her kids."

"Duh, I'll just stay here." Lori pointed at the floor.

"And who's going to pay for it? Bobby's family? They are barely scraping by as it is. Us? We're no better off financially." Lynn pointed out to her.

"And besides that…" Rita sighed "….I'm sorry Lori, but I don't think you're ready to be on your own. Having you babysit your siblings for an evening is one thing, but I don't feel comfortable letting you drive all the way back home on your own."

"I'm sixteen! You can't keep treating me like a kid!" Lori grew livid. "And if you're so worried about some biker gang or other unruly characters finding me while I stop for gas, don't worry. I'll be driving with the Santiagos, just like when I came here."

"I'm sure the Santiagos will be here for quite some time." Lynn told her. "Their family needs their support right now."

"So what? It's June? Not like I have school tomorrow." Lori said the obvious.

"Or a job…." Rita grumbled inwardly. She noticed how her daughter quickly changed the topic from feeling obliged to her boyfriend to complaining about not being treated like an adult. Rita didn't dare to think that Lori would exploit this situation just to be with Bobby and away from them.

"I'm sorry, Lori. But there's still the matter of where you would stay." Lynn continued. "The Casagrandes are overcrowded as it is-"

"I could stay here." Lori reiterated, forgetting the reasons why she couldn't stay here.

"And who would pay for it?" Lynn repeated, frustration slowly creeping into his voice.

Rita had an idea. It was more of a test than a suggestion though. "Yes. How are you supposed to pay for it? Are you suggesting getting a job to finance your prolonged stay here?"

"A job?" Lori blinked.

"Yes, that's what an adult would do in a situation like this." Rita shrugged. "It's a big city, it probably won't be hard to find a job as a waitress or as a clerk at some convenience store? Or maybe they need some help at this very hotel. Wasn't there a "Help Wanted" sign at that café, just around the corner?"

Lynn looked at his wife oddly. "Are you sure Lori is up to the task?"

"A job? You want me to find a job?" Lori couldn't wrap her head around it. Their conversation just went totally off the rails.

"So you don't like my suggestion?" Rita kept her tone even.

"No, mom. I want to stay and give Bobby emotional support, have you been listening?" Lori raised her arms. "Bobby? My boyfriend? Whose relatives died in a car crash?"

"I'm not against you giving him "emotional support", Lori. I'm merely considering how you could afford to stay here longer so you can continue supporting him?" Rita elaborated. "He has spent his hard-earned money time and time again to make you happy, how about you return the favor?"

Lori went quiet, her face betraying the conflicting flurry of emotion she was experiencing. What her mother was suggesting was alien to her, untapped ground.

Lynn didn't know what to say to this, but Rita was making sense. They couldn't afford for Lori to stay here and they didn't want to burden Bobby's family, especially at this moment. His wife's suggestion sounded like something that perhaps, just perhaps they should have been encouraging their daughter to do sooner.

"Your mother makes a good point. You said it yourself that you're not a kid? If you wish to be independent, you're going to have to earn your independence. Responsible adults don't live off their parents' welfare."

"But if you don't feel ready for this, it's quite alright." Rita told her firmly. "Then you'll just be going home with us."

"To what end?" Lori exclaimed. "Just so I can stay at home with nothing to do?"

Rita narrowed her eyes. "You could still-"

"And put up with my annoying siblings who drive me crazy more and more with each passing day…." Lori's voice trailed off as it dawned on her what she had said.

"Oh, so this is more about you than Bobby then?" Rita folded her arms, dropping any pretense of giving Lori the benefit of the doubt.

"No? No! You misunderstand….ugh!" Lori clenched her fists. "You made me all flustered with all this-"

"Pack your things, we're leaving." That was Rita's final word as she walked off into the bedroom to fetch her suitcase.

"You are so unreasonable, mom!" Lori shouted, her face turning red. "This isn't about me it's about Bo-"

Rita shut the door.

Fuming, the teen looked at her father, as if looking for back-up.

"Dad? Can't you see how ridiculous this is?" she threw her hands up. "Could you please talk some sense into her-"

"Lori! I can't do that, because your mother is right." He said firmly, surprising even himself. Lori looked at him like he had stabbed her in the back, much like the time he had denied her the right to throw a house party not too long ago.

"She's right?!" Lori pointed at herself. "My boyfriend just lost two family members and mom has the nerve to accuse me of freaking exploiting this situation?!"

"Lori, I don't believe you're doing that…." Lynn replied sincerely. He didn't think his daughter would stoop to such a low, at least not consciously. "But…."

"But what?!"

"But I don't think you're entirely motivated by Bobby's best interest."

"So you think I am doing this just to get away from you guys?!" Lori was livid.

Lynn froze there, uncertain. Like the time she asked him, no, demanded from him to have a party, the thought of her hating him scared him. But at the same time….

"It's called tough love, dad. Sometimes you gotta use it to teach people a lesson."

Lynn took a deep breath and braced himself. "Lori, we gave you an option. It was the only option there was. You declined it, so the only alternative is to go home. We never had any discussion about you staying here in the first place. I thought we were all on the same page, but apparently we were not. We came here to pay our respects and we kept our promise."

Lori glared at him defiantly.

It took every ounce of willpower for Lynn not to cave in. "And that's final, young lady."

"I hate you!" Lori cried and stormed towards the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Deflating, Lynn collapsed onto the couch and massaged his temples. Why did it have to be so difficult being a parent?


Lisa was still in her room, looking over a blueprint. She didn't have much time to ponder about the project in question though, as they were due to go. Being the youngest one of the group, she lucked out when it came to wardrobe, as her "Teens of Tomorrow" t-shirt was dragging along the floor, making it hard for her to move without tripping.

"Lisa?" she jolted upon hearing her brother's voice, followed by a loud clank.

She turned around to find a dead-eyed Fenton lying at her feet and came face to face with her brother.

"Lincoln?" she yelped as she hastily rolled up the blueprint. "Is s-something the matter?"

Lincoln struggled to find his voice. This conversation was long overdue, and yet he still couldn't find the time for it.

His expression unreadable, Lincoln replied, "I think Fenton had a short-circuit or something. Though….most of us are of the opinion that you should probably leave him like that."

"That….sounds reasonable." Lisa looked aside. "Not like he'll be of any use to me from now on."

Lincoln didn't have time to beat around the bush, nor would he have wanted to if the circumstances were different. "Look, Lisa. I just came to tell you that I am not mad at you."

Lisa's eyes widened and she dropped her rolled-up blueprint. Did she hear right him right?

"No, scratch that. I was mad at you about the zombie thing, very mad." Lincoln sighed. "I know….I know I said some pretty harsh things in the spur of the moment, but I had time to think about it and…..well…..I didn't take into consideration how you felt about it."

"Is this all some sick perversion of comedy Luan persuaded you into doing?" Lisa asked, that idea sounding like the most logical answer to her.

"No, Lisa. I am serious." Lincoln shook his head.

Lisa blinked, utterly bewildered. She had been under the impression that her brother had been willing to forgive her for the zombie incident, but after the incident with Lyle last night….?

Lincoln could easily tell what she was thinking. She obviously had not expected him to say that, not after what happened with Lyle. And not this soon.

"But…..why?" was all she could say. Despite her genius IQ, she was struggling to follow this.

"Let's just say, if I was the one who unintentionally unleashed a zombie apocalypse, I'd have a hard time living with myself. And it doesn't take a genius, no offense, to figure out that this whole thing is weighing heavily on you. Why else would you agree to be Lola's roommate for one?"

Lisa shrank. His reasoning was impeccable. Why else would someone agree to be roommates with Lola Loud unless they were some kind of masochist?

Lisa drew a breath but Lincoln cut her off. "Lisa, I know what you're doing, don't think I bought that "social experiment" bunk for a second and I want to tell you right here and now that you don't have to punish yourself with stuff like that, it won't help any of us. I think the immense guilt you're obviously feeling is enough of a punishment."

Lisa still didn't know what to say to that. For once, her brilliant mind drew a blank. "What….what are you trying to say with that? Didn't you say I was…"

"Lisa, I wasn't thinking straight that one time. I had just lived through a zombie apocalypse for crying out. And if you're referring to the Lyle thing…." Lincoln sighed and dragged his hand across his face.

"That disaster was set into motion long before the zombie thing. Lola was the one who stole your flask and none of us knew about it." He rubbed the bridge of his nose and let out an involuntary giggle, he himself struggling to wrap his mind around that. "Same for the zombie thing, I realize you didn't intend for your serum to come into contact with any of us."

"Leni was the one who fed it to Lana. That imbecile though it was soup." Lisa blurted it out as a knee-jerk reaction and immediately regretted it, fearing that she may have spilled the beans about another secret she had hoped to sweep under the rug.

Upon Lincoln's puzzled look, she added, "Um….at least that's what Fenton claimed? I had ordered him to dispose of the faulty serum but he was apparently struck by a door and Leni scooped up the container….and….and assumed that it was soup which could help cure Lana's ailment. His words, not mine."

"Leni?" Lincoln cocked an eyebrow, but wasn't really surprised by the revelation and massaged his forehead. "Oh, Leni, Leni…."

Lisa swallowed a lump. "I'm not trying to shift blame…it's just…."

"I can believe that, Lisa." Lincoln exhaled. As ridiculous as it sounded, with Leni Loud such stupidity was to be expected. She may been the kindest soul in this house, but her lack of brains sometimes more than made up for her lack of malice.

"So….patient zero was all the result of a stupid person doing something stupid, huh?" he asked her with a small hint of levity. "That…..that actually isn't too different from some horror films I've seen."

Did she see him smile, in her vicinity? Was he really forgiving her? Lisa couldn't fathom why, not after she had endangered him and the rest of her family two times in a row.

Collecting himself, Lincoln could see how Lisa was still confused by his declaration of forgiveness. He couldn't blame her. What could you say after you had endangered your family two times in the span of a few days and then one of them just came to you and said, "No hard feelings".

He knew hearing him say that wouldn't do much to quell her enormous guilt or her self-loathing, but it was at least a start in helping the child prodigy find some closure, if that was even possible at this point? Lincoln was starting to feel guilty for not having the time to console her about it. Maybe with the start of July, if he played his cards right, he would have the time to help her cope with it more?

"Look, the point is…I just want to make it clear to you that I don't hate you." he couldn't speak on behalf of Lynn or his other siblings, and he was pretty sure Ryan did hate Lisa's guts, but he wasn't speaking for them but for himself.

A small tear poured past Lisa's glasses and down her face. Her voice was croaky, "Are you really sincere? Please, don't toy with me. I can handle the unrelenting truth. It would be pre-preferable to hearing a placating lie."

"I'm 100% sincere, Lisa." Lincoln said clearly and stretched out an arm.

Lisa wasn't sure what that gesture meant, but she didn't let her brain guide her this time. She threw herself at Lincoln, embracing him and sniffing, while he patted her back.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness, accidents or not." Lisa replied, looking downcast.

"Well, this isn't about what you think, Lisa." He said gently. "It's about what I think. Maybe I am just a sentimental fool, but I don't see the logic in hating my own sister for the rest of my life, especially over a bunch of accidents, as bad as they may have been. Hating each other would just make things worse."

"Yes, animosity is impractical as far as familial relations go." Lisa sniffed despondently. "But even hearing you declare your forgiveness doesn't help make me feel any less self-conscious about the danger my insatiable scientific curiosity and compulsion to invent represent to our family and the world."

That was true, Lincoln couldn't deny it. Unfortunately, with Lisa, things were a lot more complicated than mere, everyday sibling squabbles. Lincoln wished he had more time to talk with her, but even if he had, he still had no clue how to handle this topic, other than letting his youngest sister know that he hadn't disowned her.

He put a hand on her shoulder. "Lisa…I…..look, this isn't the time to talk. We have a job to do. I promise, we'll talk more once we have the time for it."

Lisa smiled a little, as if to reassure him that she did feel a little better now. But it was a lie, and she felt guilty, knowing that they would probably never have this conversation. Not if her plan worked.

"Doesn't she have smaller shirts, this thing's-AH!" they heard Lana's voice in the hall, followed by a thud. It didn't take much processing to figure what had happened.

Lincoln quickly peeked through the door and found the tomboy face down on the floor. Lola catwalked past her, also wearing an oversized shirt, carrying herself with her trademark snotty attitude.

"Well, if you wore a "sparkly towel" once in a while, you might actually know how to maneuver in wardrobe that wasn't knitted in a smelly barnyard." She chuckled to herself before noticing Lincoln and Lisa watching them and moved on, being all too aware of the target sign that was currently on her back.

Lana staggered to her feet, clenching her teeth and pulled something out of her pocket. It was a spray can.

"I'll show you!" Lana growled but nearly fell back as someone grabbed her hand.

"Lana, no fighting!" Lincoln scolded her. The little blonde glared up at him.

"Didn't you hear her? That stuck-up snob has no right to-"

"Yes, Lana. I heard her loud and clear." Lincoln tried to keep his tone even as he pried the small pepper spray can out of her hand and pushed it into his own pocket. "But we have a job to do, remember?"

Lana pouted. "But she-"

"Lana, we're doing this to pay Renee's hospital bills and so mom and dad won't have a heart attack once they find out about it." Lincoln tried to explain, though his tone was exasperated. Remembering Lynn's warning about how any more stress could make their parents split up, Lana deflated, but still seethed from anger.

Sighing, Lincoln tried to reason with her. "I know you're better than her, so can you please behave yourself? At least until the job's done?" he said in a gentler tone. "Believe me, the reward will be worth the effort."

Lana pulled her hand free and grumbled under her breath. "Fine…..but I don't have to work with her, do I?"

"Oh, no. You two will hardly see each other all day." Lincoln was quick to assure her. "I'm certain Lola will prefer working with Kathleen personally."

Hearing that, Lana felt better and obeyed her brother as she was told to head downstairs.

"Come on, Lisa. It's time to go." Lincoln called out to his remaining sister before following Lana.

"In a minute!" Lisa replied before quickly picking up her blueprint, which was labeled "Project: Brain Drain". She sighed as she tucked it into a drawer.

Lincoln's visit had been a pleasant, if entirely unexpected, but still pleasant surprise. He had forgiven her. Defying all logic, he had forgiven her. It didn't do much to alleviate her guilt, but knowing that at least one family member still cared enough to be willing to forgive her gave her a small amount of closure.

After all, this might very well be the final conversation she would have with her brother, before she effectively killed herself, if not in the traditional sense. It was a radical decision, but Lisa knew it was necessary. There just wasn't any way around it. No matter how much she tried, her experiments were disaster-magnets, and if they didn't explode (literally and figuratively), her sisters meddling with them would ensure that the next disaster was just around the corner.

She could promise Lincoln all she wanted that she would be more careful from now on, but that was a futile gesture. Lisa knew that she couldn't quit being a scientist, her impulses would get the better of her sooner or later. There was only one solution if she wanted to ensure her family's continued safety: to get rid of the core problem. Her. She was the problem. She wasn't normal, she knew that, she was an anomaly of human mental development. Being brought down to normal would certainly be the safer and more preferable option.

But that would have to wait for now, for she was needed by her family. Lisa calculated that within this scenario, if nothing else, scientific-related mishaps were impossible.

She was ready to go, when she noticed something lying on her bed. A small remote device. One invention that she knew, for a fact, did work splendidly. Lisa wanted to ignore it, but then, flashbacks of the night before flooded her mind, making her nervous. If only she had been carrying that with her last night, their brush with death could have been avoided?

"That's ridiculous." She tried to brush those thoughts aside. "Us being in any danger where we are heading…." She tried hard to subdue her impulse to just grab it.

"But….better safe than sorry." She caved in and grabbed it, tucking it into her pocket. Just in case.


Riding in this limo would have been pretty dam cool, if it wasn't owned by Kathleen Tisdale. The inside of her limo obviously spared no expenses, as it could aptly be described as the mobile, compacted interior of a rave party, flashy lights, sound design and all, and leather-covered seats on both sides that could hold up to ten people respectively. Good thing, as all but one of them did not wish to sit next to their gracious host.

"The interior of this vehicle contains a lot of superfluous accessories that are of no benefit for safe and effective transportation." Lisa noted, somewhat intrigued by what she saw, only to receive frosty looks from Lucy and Lynn, sitting to her left. She promptly remembered to keep a low profile.

"Still looks kinda cool though." Lana commented, sitting to Lynn's left. The jock turned to her, slightly annoyed. "Eh…but…whatever." Lana shrugged in response.

"You have a keen eye, Lisa. I admit, I did over-accessorize a bit." Kathleen freely admitted.

"Well, if you ask me, your limo is simply lavish, Kathleen." Lola said proudly, all while huddling very closely to their host. The unwelcome glares she received only served as a reminder for her not to stray far from Kathleen.

"Well, I did see to it that the ride would be as enjoyable for my passengers as possible." The rich girl added. "Not to brag or anything."

"Oh, no. Your limo is very…co…..co….cool, Kathleen." Lynn, very painfully, forced a smile onto her face and gave her a thumb up, mindful not to say anything that could upset their host. "It was inconsiderate of me not to have noticed it the first time."

"Wait? So it's okay to compliment her now?" Lana made a face, and was promptly elbowed to pipe down, before being patted on the head by the jock.

"Oh, Lana, you say the most random things." Lynn chuckled forcibly.

"Oh, Lynn. There is no need for flattery." Kathleen insisted. "All I wish from you is to do your job like everyone else. And hopefully have an enlightening experience doing so."

Lynn wanted to hurl. She was actually starting to somewhat miss the old Kathleen. Her cruel and nasty insults would be a step up from this cheesy and saccharine bullshit.

"So, all of them will be part of our group? Even the little ones?" a confused Jenny asked her friend. "Are any of them even teens?"

"Lynn and Ryan are almost there, but it doesn't matter what age you are." Kathleen smiled. "As long as your heart is in the right place, you are never too young to make a difference."

"Yup, I'll need a barf bag." Lynn grumbled inwardly.

"Okay, you're the boss." Jenny shrugged, accustomed to never questioning Kathleen. They heard whimpers and sounds of resistance.

"Is there a problem, guys." Kathleen turned to the boys at the far end of the limo. Lincoln was trying to get Charles and Cliff into a huge "pet carrier" with a volume of five feet or so, overseen by Amber.

"No, no, they just have cold feet." Lincoln assured her before turning back to his confused pets.

"I'm really sorry, guys." He apologized as he shoved the cat in. "But Kathleen says small, cute animals help boost morale at the hospital."

He chuckled involuntarily as Charles licked his face. "Alright, buddy. Save that enthusiasm for the little patients." Lincoln told him as he guided him in. Charles had managed to brave through the wilderness to find his way back home, but Lincoln didn't know if he could survive hordes of bed-ridden kids with tons of pent-up energy and bugger-covered hands.

The remaining pet, did not share the dog's upbeat attitude. She was struggling and trying to escape Ryan's grasp.

"Is something wrong with her?" Amber asked obliviously.

"I dunno, maybe she doesn't like cramped cages?" Ryan grunted sarcastically, trying not to get his face scratched.

"Cramped? This thing is like a mini-suite." Lincoln pointed out.

"A cage is a cage to an animal." Ryan retorted as he kneeled down. "Now move it."

Lincoln did so, as Ryan tried to get Marceline inside, but she grasped the edges of the door, meowing fearfully. Inside, Charles and Cliff were sprawled out and relaxing on the super-soft cushions.

"Just so you know…" Ryan looked back at Kathleen "…if she catches anything, you're paying for her shots."

"Don't worry about it, Ryan. She'll be fine." Kathleen assured him.

"Yeah, she's bound to become an instant favorite." Amber smiled. "Few kids get to see exotic pets."

His cat continued to put up a fight, and hearing her distressed meows made Ryan feel guilty, especially knowing that being stuck in the cage would probably be the pleasant part of the job before getting assaulted by hundreds of grubby little hands.

"I'm sorry, Marcy, I swear I'll make it up to you….somehow." he told her regretfully before forcefully shoving her in and swiftly locking the door.

Ryan and Lincoln stepped back as they heard her screeching from the inside, accompanied by yelps and hollering as Charles and Cliff were caught in her freak-out.

"Awww, they're playing together." Amber cooed. "Who says cats and dogs can't get along?"

"Well, she and Charlie get along fine enough, the occasional bloody nose notwithstanding." Ryan shrugged sardonically as him and Lincoln went back to their seats.

On his way there, he glared down at Lola and let out a low throat growl, making her huddle closer to Kathleen. Kathleen didn't seem to notice, as she was too excited about their trip and clasped her hands.

"Alright then! Now that our furry companions have been accommodated, it's time to….eh, Ryan? What are you wearing?"

The others turned towards him, and Lincoln, who was sitting right next to him, slapped his forehead as he saw Ryan wearing his skull-themed luchador mask. Lana sniggered, while Lola tried her hardest not to do the same, out of self-preservation.

"What? I agreed to be a "volunteer", doesn't mean I want people to recognize me." He shrugged before adopting a Hispanic accent. "Just call me Raul, a mysterrrious exchange student from Arrrgentina."

Kathleen rolled her eyes. "Ryan, I don't think that skull mask gives off a very congenial and approachable vibe."

"And why is that, senorita?"

Kathleen rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Ryan, just take that thing off. Do you want to give those kids nightmares?"

"She thinks the mask is too scary for kids?" Jenny whispered to Amber.

The boy grumbled and pulled it off, stuffing it into his backpack. "Fine, but you'll still be calling me by an alias."

"If you insist, as long as it encourages you to tap into your inner humanitarian." Kathleen humored him before getting back on topic. "Anyways, before we go I would just like to remind you that our goal is to brighten the day for a lot of poor kids who have been through a lot, so Lynn?"

"Yes?" the jock grumbled.

"Remember to be gentle."

"Oh, I'll be as gentle as a lamb." Lynn rolled her eyes.

"And Lucy? Try to refrain from being too scary."

"Who told you I was "scary"?" the goth questioned.

"I did." Lola huffed. "I had to let her know what she was in for." She wilted upon receiving more hateful glares. "What! It's true! Lucy is one of the least approachable people in the world, don't act like it's not true!"

"Ever looked in a mirror?" the goth snarked humorlessly.

Kathleen cleared her throat. "By which I mean, just don't do stuff like reading people's palms or giving them cards that foretell their horrific demise, Lucy. Just a suggestion."

"Sigh….fine…" Lucy grumbled.

"And Ryan?" Kathleen blinked upon seeing him wearing a dark grey beanie and putting on sunglasses.

"The name's Brian Tyler." He told her. "Brian."

"Alright, Brian. Just try to be mindful of children's sensibilities." Kathleen told him, before musing.

"I'm sure I'll do fine."

Kathleen looked unconvinced. "On second thought, I'll just assign you to story reading duty in advance."

"Yippy…." Ryan replied in a bored tone.

"Alright, off to Royal Woods' Children Hospital we go. Step on it, James."

As the long limousine backed out of the driveway, Lincoln glanced through the window and caught a glimpse of Luan looking at them from her bedroom window before pulling back the curtains.

He sighed, while Lisa, seated next to him, glanced at her pocket and eyed her teleportation device. She still hadn't told him about it, and thought that it would be best if he held on to it.

"Psssttt…Lincoln? I forgot to tell you something?" she whispered to him.

"What it is it, Lisa?" he asked, still glancing through the window, when one of her words hit him. Forgotten?

Suddenly, he felt a nagging fear that they had forgotten something at home, something important?

"Hey, guys?" he asked his siblings, glancing over Lisa. "Have we forgotten something?"

"Forgotten what?" Lynn cocked an eyebrow. The only things they had forgotten, as far as she was aware, were their dignities.

"We're all here, except for Luan?" Lucy stated.

"Yeah, real pity she didn't tag along." Kathleen cut in with a regretful look. "This would have been right up her alley."

Lynn rolled her eyes and looked back at her brother. "Whatever it is, it can't be that important."

"I guess you're right." He scratched his head.

The limo drove away from their house and past a certain bunker, where Leni's voice was heard from down below.

"Hello? Anybody up there? I think something's wrong with Luna?"


Phew…took me forever to post this. I have been hard-pressed to find the time to write the next chapter, and this was originally meant to be just a quick in-between bit, showing what Lori, Lynn Sr. and Rita were up to, as it has been a while since their last appearance, but I ended up adding some more scenes I've written in advance and hobbled this together.

This chapter set up quite a few things, especially regarding Lisa. Given the protagonist's luck so far, her bringing her teleportation remote along could either turn out to be their last-minute salvation or the thing that zaps them right into their next precarious situation. Then there's her own secret plan to improve the lives of her family, by getting rid of the thing she considers to be her family's greatest curse. Her scientific mind!