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Chapter Fifty-three


His presence no longer deters her away nor envelops her curiosity. The young man is simply a boring mystery now and one Sakura only grows curious to solve at certain times. He disgusts her with his audacious attitude and the disregard he has with the lives of those who are meant to be close to him. For that reason, from his words, does she remain quiet while staring out towards the endless blue. Only the distant calls of birds, ocean waves, and salty sea breeze fills each of their senses. Yet… She sighs heavily when she admits, to herself then, that the bond she has with this man, from his childhood, is as prominent as the day she told him she loved him.

The man behind her would make her flee at the drop of a coin. However, the boy he was once was makes her plant her feet firmly in this spot.

She is unsure still as when he first asked her that if it is love that ties them together in an inseparable knot. She will admit, though, that there is a bond, even if she is tugging at the strings still to undo herself from him. At this point, she realizes Kankuro's words echo more and more each time she dwells on what to do next.

"...He just doesn't want to lose you again, you know? I'm sure he'll lighten up and give you more freedom soon. I know he really cares for you so it probably wouldn't take you much to turn him into a complete pushover."

'I have to get him to trust me,' she thinks.

Her stare is still hard at the crashing waves, but eventually, a smirk lifts her face some as she recollects a past scenario.

'It's just like when he was young,' she thinks. 'I have to build that trust all over again.'

It's her only plan now, yet still one Sakura worries will have an unhappy outcome. She cannot pretend to agree with this world he has helped to create that is painted in red from blood and flames of war, and she cannot comprehend what hurt may come to him if she grasps at a chance to escape.

'I'll just have to try and change his mind,' Sakura thinks.

If she is lucky, if he is quick to her side like his child self was, perhaps she can even influence him to cease fighting for a good period of time. It would help her friends and family back in Konoha to recoup. After all, as much as his presence now irks her, as long as they are together she knows he is not out killing others.

Plus, above it all, she just wants to learn what has happened to her little friend over the course of fifteen years.

"No," she whispers, finally answering Gaara behind her. "I was doing no such thing."

She isn't surprised to hear the scowl in Gaara's next words.

"You lie, Sakura."

That is true, but, she is pretty sure Gaara is slightly gullible and easy to believe what he wishes to believe.

The rosette holds her smile as she begins reaching for her shoes. She can feel Gaara's gaze settle on her like a hawk, but nonetheless continues to remove her shoes before settling them to the side and nestling herself to sit on the sand. Though it's a spur of the moment idea, the sensation of the cool ocean water splashing against her feet is calming feeling.

"I just wanted to relax my feet is all," she replies back.

She swallows hard, preparing herself to take her next course of her plan. Leaning back on her free arm, she turns that smile towards Gaara and isn't surprised that he meets her gaze with a hard grimace.

"Have you tried it yet? Come join me," she tells him.

Her smile turns into a grin but before she can let the young man delve back into that heartfelt beam, before he can even resurface a warm memory of her looking at him with that sort of light, she turns her head quickly back towards the ocean. It's like a tease, it beckons him, and Sakura smirks when she senses Gaara taking her bait. Yet, it's also a thought that aches the young woman's heart. So desperate he is for her smile again that her calls attract him easily like a loving puppy.

He approaches next to her, but does not sit and take in the manner she has offered him to do. Instead, he stands there with arms crossed as he stares out towards the ocean along with her.

"Sit!" Sakura comments. "It feels really good."

Looking up at him, his hard features remain unmoved and he sets them entirely at the world ahead of them. His attention only sways when Sakura lifts her foot and wiggles her toes as water gently drops from them.

"It's relaxing," she ushers him, turning her smile back to him.

As his hard eyes meet her smile she can sense them waver. Though he may not show it, she is certain he is puzzled by her antics. Yet, his firm stance next to her tells her he is intrigued enough to stay.

"It's no bathhouse, but the water is just as refreshing," Sakura murmurs.

It's bait once again, she murmurs events they share of the past, and before he can question or study her body language, she turns to look back at the ocean. Desperation in him suddenly surfaces, feelings of past he has learned to numb himself of, there's a threat in his mind that she is not what she seems and that pain, he twice endured, lurks in every corner.

Still… The temptation is almost too much.

Sakura has to turn her head more to hide her growing smirk as she listens to Gaara settle a seat next to her, and his actions clarify both what Kankuro has told her, but also what her aching heart has been trying to divulge to her; That the young man just may be desperate for that understanding Sakura gave him all those years ago.

'Was truly no one ever kind to him these past years?' Sakura wonders.

Yet, the question is forgotten once she feels Gaara's attention back on her and she turns to meet him with a smile.

"Now your feet," she tells him, nodding her head towards the ocean.

Yet, Gaara does not move to remove his shoes, instead he just stares hard at Sakura.

"What?" she asks, humor in her voice. "You don't-"

"What is it you are trying to accomplish exactly, Sakura?" Gaara cuts her off.

'Caught,' what her mind first tells her.

Yet, if she is honest with herself, the scenario, her vague words may just be enough to… Sakura's smile never falters and turns back towards the ocean.

"What?" she asks him in return. "It isn't obvious to you?"

Gaara's face is still hard once her eyes are back on him and she nestles her head to relax on her knees as she hugs her legs. Her relaxed, innocent stance seems to makes Gaara's hard stare let up some.

"I just want to be your friend again, Gaara."

Truest words she has possibly told him since their reunion and it morphs Gaara's face to a surprised look. Even his mouth goes agape as his eyes shine suddenly to Sakura. He need not say anything, for Sakura knows his words exactly.

'This is just what you want too,' she thinks.

Yet, another thought must overcome him, for he swallows hard before his eyes begin to sway.

"These childish acts don't garner friendship," he warns. "There is a bond between us, Sakura, but the friend I am looking for is the one that follows me into war. You were the first to set my stepping stones for this path. Will you not continue to lay out that path until I reach the end?"

Sakura sighs heavily and her eyes looks everywhere at the moment but him.

"I don't agree with this war," she murmurs. "There is no reason for this senseless bloodshed if all you wish to accomplish is your utopia."

She turns her narrowed eyes towards him, mildly surprised that he doesn't share her angry look as well. She would assume this sort of rejection would make his blood boil, yet he sits calmly and waits on her to continue.

"The world is not meant for you, and your rules, only. That is why Kage's were formed, that is why countries are separated. Above that, there will always be someone who stands up against your beliefs, there will always be someone working there way to ensure your downfall. Only lonely souls seek out that sort of glory."

The faintest smirk suddenly appears on Gaara and it surprises Sakura once again.

"I am not where I am today had I succumbed to the blades of those who oppose me," Gaara tells her with a lift of his chin.

He need not explain his words, Sakura understands what it is he wishes to convey to her now.

"I am strong. I fear no enemy. No one has stopped me. No one ever will."

Sakura merely shakes her head before turning her gaze away.

'This scenario is close to Madara's own wish,' Sakura thinks, the idea of the two worlds she is familiar with plays in her mind. 'Maybe Gaara's role in this world is to match with Madara's from mine. If that's true, who has taken Gaara's role? Where is the kind Kazekage?'

Sakura's face grimaces all the harder and her features must speak to Gaara for he voices himself without her pressing for more.

"Sakura," he calls to her, and continues when she doesn't meet his gaze, "the rebels are a losing side. I have given them many opportunities to end this war, yet they refuse. I have given them ample chances to stop all this bloodshed-"

"What you ask for is absurd!" Sakura cuts him off, angry eyes settled back on him. "Of course they would refuse, you wish to dictate an entire world! Who would hand over the lives of everyone to one man?!"

"You've seen those rats who hide in Konoha!" Gaara barks back, his temper loose as he leans closer in towards Sakura before pounding his chest with a fist. "You've seen their numbers! Think of that sad, small, poor excuse of a group and then remember that those outside of Konoha follow me as their leader already! I already have most of the world watching my back!"

Sakura's eyes widen to this declaration and her mouth even drops some as she tries to comprehend those numbers.

'How…?' she first wonders. 'How could this man of accumulated so many?'

How could he convince so many around him to follow him blindly and destroy the world their ancestors worked hard to create.

'Maybe it's fear,' she thinks. 'Perhaps, as his numbers grew, he convinced people through fear to join him. Maybe they would rather follow him than die now...'

His past self, the one she knew from her world, had an aura of evil and power that radiated off of him when their paths crossed. The idea he convinced people to follow him through a threat of death becomes more prominent. As his numbers grew, the more people feared him and his power, or they blindly followed him as the crowds grew.

'Some of those fighting for him may not agree with his views, but they would rather follow now than die,' Sakura thinks.

She is silent as she stares at Gaara, and her muteness even calms Gaara some, for he relaxes once again and sorts himself out from his abrupt shouts. He has a temper, she learns now. He may be quick to welcome it when someone upsets him, but around her, he does try to emanate a sense of control and power through his words and stance.

"They pushed me, Sakura," Gaara confesses.

The rosette's eyes widens once again and he stares out towards the ocean.

"If they had just handed over what I asked for this war would be over," he murmurs.

"They fight for their freedom that you may very well take if you were given power," Sakura counters.

Yet, to her words, Gaara merely shakes his head.

"No," he tells her. "There is something else. Something I wanted in the beginning more than the position I seek now."

It's his turn to tease her with mystery from his words. There is always more to the scenario, Sakura knows, and there is now a need in her to understand how her little friend became the man he is today. What he says is too good to resist, to pretend to not care, even if she is sure of what he is to say next.

"What?" she whispers, almost in a trance. "What was it you wanted?"

His smile spreads, growing bigger, and more malicious looking, until he shows her teeth and eyes of amusement. It is still a game he wishes to play with her.

"I will indulge you in everything you wish to know, Sakura," he murmurs. "But my answers will only come once you satisfy me with your own."

She needn't even ask what it is he seeks out. She knows he wants to know of her past fifteen years so to speak. Where she had gone, where and how she had hid, and probably most importantly to him…

Why.

Yet, it is far too soon for Sakura to give him any of that. Trust is only a sliver between them, and the truth would have Gaara questioning Sakura more now than ever.

"One day," she tells him instead. "One day, but not today."

Gaara only stares at her while her eyes face the ocean. She imagines anger to overtake him, but he surprises her with just the simplest nod of his head. Perhaps, there is more understanding of this situation in him than Sakura first believed. There may be some mental instability in him, a darkness that threatens to overtake mind and body, but he is just the genius now as he is in her own world. He is exactly…

'Just like how he was when he was younger,' Sakura thinks.

"I'll be waiting," he murmurs. "That day, I will present you with answers as well."

Sakura says nothing, even when Gaara's stare lingers and waits on her. Instead, her mind is elsewhere, thinking back on the trust she has to build. It becomes evident to Sakura that, unlike his younger self who backed away from her, Gaara now seeks the same thing in her once he moves his body to sit closer next to her.

"In the meantime, we shall entertain one another," he tells her as he moves his body.

"Entertain?" Sakura questions, eyes back on him.

She watches Gaara suck on his teeth while in thought.

"There is only so much this island can offer," he rephrases.

'Ah,' Sakura thinks, finally understanding. 'It can get boring here.'

Though Sakura hates to bring it up, she does question once again.

"Is there not a war you should be fighting? You sent Kankuro into battle when you could have easily gone with."

Gaara tilts his head and contemplates her words before speaking.

"True," he admits. "Were I out there, the fighting up north would be done and dealt with. I should be out there proving my place than leisurely sitting here."

As if his words strike some deeper insight into him, he scowls lightly before speaking more.

"For now, my place is here. Next to you."

Sakura looks up at him, curious.

"You missed me that much?" she asks.

Her question, innocent as it is, makes the redhead grimace and lower his head slightly, as if something irritable has just bit him.

"The fact that you even ask that tells me our feeling on this matter is not a shared one," he speaks with a light snarl.

Sakura widens her eyes and lifts her head.

"Are you saying I didn't miss you as well?"

Gaara is silent for the moment and stares distantly before he replies.

"Somewhere I imagined our feelings towards one another to be mutual..."

She has to admit that she can't hold a candle to the separation Gaara must feel compared to her. A minute for her was fifteen years for him, after all. Still, if she delves deep in her heart and searches for what she truly wishes to accomplish with the man next to her, she realizes what she misses most is his child self and in turn the friendship they once had. In her own way, she understands what he is feeling. Even if it feels like it is someone else, his child self to be exact, Sakura rebuttals his claim.

"Of course I missed you," she conveys.

Gaara simply continues to stare, silent.

"I miss..." Sakura begins, stretching her feet back down in front of her. "I miss being stuck in your room all day and breaking your toys."

Finally, she nabs Gaara's attention, and he looks back at her as she presses on.

"I miss your wake-up calls every morning. I miss the way you were always hungry, and I miss our visits to get kakigori."

Though she doesn't look up to see it, the smallest of smiles etch up Gaara's hard, cold face then.

"You seem to keep an unblemished mind," Gaara comments.

Sakura turns her eyes up towards Gaara, surprised by his warm and curious eyes. He even relaxes his shoulders and leans his head more one way, telling her he is comfortable with the situation now and their conversation. The reason behind his words is because these instances only occurred weeks prior for her compared to his many years. Yet, if she thinks hard on the moments they shared, she realizes no amount of years will ever have her forgetting the small boy and all they shared together.

"I treasure those memories," Sakura admits. "No way I'll ever forget.

A treasure she calls them, and it would make Gaara agree. In his mind, he wonders why she would forsake that so-called treasure, but bites his tongue so as not to speak it. She has already told him that she will tell him in time.

"Are you telling me you forgot those instances?" Sakura asks Gaara, mocking him slightly.

She's a little hurt that a definite no doesn't come from him right away. Instead, he hums in thought while turning his eyes away.

"It's hard to say," he tells her. "After all, how can I admit to remember it all when you may very well recount something I've long forgotten. I only remember what I remember. For me, it is everything, yet you may say otherwise."

Sakura grimaces, but agrees with what he says. He may hold on to a memory she has forgotten as well.

"Also," he adds, "For as long as I tried to keep those memories fresh, forced them to stay in the front of my mind, in time I eventually had to push those moments to the back of my head. I always kept them there but in time, reminiscing on the past of our moments, became too vexing. I strive everyday to pull myself farther and farther away from moments."

Sakura's eyes widen in surprise. As he sits here now with her, Sakura imagined Gaara to have kept her dear to his heart, now it feels as though he is conveying how much he wished for her to have been forgotten from his mind. As he looks at her, his eyes widen briefly for a moment, and the reasoning behind that must be the hurt in her look now, for he continues on.

"I gave myself a new purpose once you left me," he begins in almost a whisper. "to find you and hear your answers to my questions. Along that path, I hid from those who would return me to my father, ran from those who promised me what you had long ago, killed those who tried to stop me, learned secrets of the world from those who spoke to the shadows, and found myself in lands very few have set foot into..."

Sakura's eyes widen to what Gaara says now. Though vague, he gives her some eyesight to what happened within all those years.

"Then, just when I accept that my happiness ought not be stemmed entirely from you. Once I agreed with my mind that you had left me for the same reasons everyone else had..."

Gaara leans in closer to Sakura and a grin begins to spread across his face; his teeth making her lean back away from him as he continues to speak.

"Just when I work on a new purpose, too busy to delve my thoughts back on you, here you are now. Right by my side, again."

There's amusement in his gaze once again as he looks down at Sakura.

"Now all those past memories are resurfacing. Moments I told myself not to care for, or find happiness through, is suddenly overwhelming me."

It's a dark feeling he now emits as she stares up at his emanating eyes, but Sakura still can't tear her gaze away. Just as the rosette feels at ease with this Gaara, he suddenly retracts this feeling through his own mental mind.

"I want to kill you, Sakura. I want to hurt you the same way you hurt me and also be rid of you once and for all. You hold many threats against me, some you may not even know about. Just as I'm accepting to let go of you, here you are now. Yet, because you are here now, because I have a chance now to never let you go again, because you are mystery before my very eyes, is why you live now. It's so exciting that the thought of hurting you almost pains me."

It's such a warped mind, Sakura thinks. She is even surprised by all he tells her now, an admittance that he wants to hurt her, yet, somewhere deep inside of her, she almost feels as if she knew this about him already.

'Perhaps, just the same as when he was younger,' she thinks. 'He probably would have taken the chance to kill me had he chance. What stopped him was our...'

"Friendship," she can't help but whisper.

Her small word seems to awaken Gaara and his eyes widen before he draws closer towards Sakura, his gaze never breaking from her.

'He may keep secrets from me,' Sakura thinks. 'Yet, he at least truthful in a sense.'

Her heart races as she tries to collect her thoughts as Gaara's hand squeezes her own.

"What are you, Sakura?" he whispers, almost in trance. "A present for me or a trick?"

To that question, the way his gaze continues to pierce through her, Sakura retracts her hand from his. His words then remind her too much of another man. A man who could convey hate so well while hiding a deep love.

'Rasa...' she thinks as she narrows her gaze towards Gaara.

"I am neither of those things," Sakura tells him instead. "I am Sakura. Your friend."

Gaara's stare is hard for a few moments as he takes in her words and appearance. He eventually nods lightly before sighing and retreating his hand and body away from her.

"Friend," he repeats, voice as soft as the wind.

His eyes drift with the waves for some time before he nods once more.

"Alright," he adds, almost as if he is agreeing with something else in his mind.

Sakura, meanwhile, stares at him, somewhat fascinated how quiet he can become as he indulges within himself to what she says. Maybe her declaration, her words to be what she once was to him, shakes something within him. In time, he turns to look back at her, face blank.

"I plan to fix it after I end this war, but for now my success is measured by the destruction around me. Yet, you want no part in it, you even say you will convince me all of this is my wrongdoing. You're against everything I do now, yet you want to be my friend still."

Sakura nods once, clarifying for him. Her motion makes him shake his head in disbelief as a sarcastic laugh breaks through his lips. Still, overall that, there's amusement in his eyes, and his words match the emotion in his gaze.

"Interesting," he tells her. "You're an interesting character, Sakura. I see now why Rasa kept you close."

Sakura's eyes widen upon hearing those words and her face must show her shock for Gaara's amused smirk returns as he crooks his neck.

"How did you-?" she begins before Gaara cuts her off.

"I'm not blind, Sakura. As a child, even I knew Rasa forced you upon me even if you said otherwise. Once I returned to Suna, despite pushing you away from my free thoughts, the opportunity to find out more about you came once I was back in Rasa's office. A false citizenship, no records of past missions, background or even a damn birth certificate. Not to mention, you had a means of stopping me that only Rasa possessed, yet you were nowhere to be found when Shukaku's chain broke the creature free. I was also an astute child. I understood what went on through the village despite my age and never had I come across someone with pink hair."

His smirk only grows as Sakura remains silent to his words.

"Right?" he ask, his brow bones lifting to his words.

"It's true," Sakura admits, her eyes turning towards the ocean. "I came across you in the desert and helped you to recover. In the process, your father had seen my way of countering your defense. So, he pressed me to be your caregiver. I was meant to stop you if you attacked. Yet..."

Sakura's thoughts trail as he recalls why Rasa truly kept her.

'I wasn't only meant to protect people from Gaara, but more to protect Gaara from those Rasa was forced to send to kill his son. Still, that was a message his father could never convey to Gaara.'

"Yet, we were like prisoners sharing a cell because of that man," Gaara adds, hoping he is finishing her sentence.

Sakura, however, shakes her head to Gaara's words.

"Nn," she murmurs. "I had every means in me to escape. That man's weak chains are not what kept me."

Sakura turns her smile towards Gaara, not surprised to see his face elicit some surprise as she speaks.

"I just wanted to show my little friend that there was so much love in him and for him."

Heartwarming, lifting words are only greeted by Gaara's hard frown before he adds.

"When one learns to love, he risks hate."

"Would you rather I had run then?" Sakura asks. "Would your world be a simpler one had I not become your friend?"

She can feel her eyebrow twitch as Gaara lifts his head some to contemplate her words.

"It's hard to say if-"

"No!" Sakura cuts him off with a shout. "What's wrong with you? Why is the concept of love so misinterpreted by you? Love is suppose to be a heartwarming feeling. It's suppose to convey that you feel as close as you possibly can to someone."

Sakura realizes then that this Gaara is the second man she has known her whole life who conveys love as almost a burden.

"Perhaps..." Gaara begins shortly after her. "Because of it it has caused me turmoil through the years. I know of love, Sakura. I know the feeling of being tied to another through the emotion. Because you are here now, I am ready to welcome it. Yet, it was because of love that I felt so anxious, so unrested, when I you disappeared. That constant question, of how you truly felt towards me swam through my mind morning through night."

Sakura opens her mouth to speak but Gaara cuts her off.

"Love may be a wonderful thing, I know, but it is an emotion I still wonder if just a fleeting one. I can speak it to you, convey your importance to me, and how wonderful you must feel to hear it. Yet, you keep your lips pursed when I ask if your feelings are the same. I don't ask you to say it if you truly don't feel that way, but certainly you understand the cruelty you inflict now sharing words with me you did when I was a child but refuse to say now."

Sakura's eyes widen to his words and shamefully she places her eyes away from his.

'It's true,' she thinks for she was in his shoes when it came to Sasuke and his muteness when Sakura claimed love for him.

"To share it only in one instance as a child, before you ran, to never hear that sentence again, from anyone, do you realize now why I say when one loves he risks hate? Love, has been more unkind to me than its meaning. Were you not here now, reminiscing in me old fleeting feelings, I would rather hate than love."

Sakura lifts her head quick then and this time pushes her face closer to Gaara as a sadness sweeps over her face.

"I-I'm-That!" she quickly speaks. "That wasn't my intention. I didn't mean to leave you questioning love, I meant to leave you with people who would continue to-"

Sakura stops when Gaara raises a hand to her.

"No more," he tells her suddenly. "This is a discussion I wish not to continue."

"But!" Sakura counters, her face morphing to distress. "I wanted you to know love. I want you to love! I want it to be a beautiful thing to you like it is for me I-"

"Stop!" Gaara cries.

Sakura blinks, suddenly aware of their stance. She practically towers over him as he leans away from her, and his face gives off a feature she has not seen since his childhood.

'He's scared...' she thinks.

Gaara, meanwhile, shakes his head while he quakes lightly.

"No more," he whispers. "I don't want to see you making that face again."

'My face?' Sakura thinks, trying to understand what it could have been that she may have possibly shown him.

Nonetheless, Sakura does as he asks. To push him now would cause Gaara to simply bounce back and never agree with what she says. Love takes time, and she is certain Gaara will learn it once more. So, she swallows the lump in her throat and sits silently for a moment.

'Such a sad existence,' Sakura thinks. 'Hate for him is much easier to accept than love.'

Sakura grimaces, but does not notice how Gaara watches her face contort through many emotions. Some he cannot place a name on. In his own mind are swimming thoughts and questions, and even if it is a question he'd like an answer to, he speaks more so now to end Sakura's troubling thoughts. Though he would deny, there is a faintest need in him for them to continue their conversation. To sit and relax and chat, he can recall no such time doing so then years ago.

"Sakura, are you from Konoha?"

Sakura's eyes widen and her head whips fast towards Gaara. Her reaction must be an answer for his grin begins to grow as he looks down at her.

"I thought so," he even speaks before she.

"No!" Sakura retorts before fumbling with her words. "I traveled with my family around the world. My ties are with no village."

Lies she spread when first meeting Rasa, and like his father, Gaara gives her the impression that he can see right through her lie.

"Ho?" he hums for a moment. "Interesting. You know, just because the rebels group there doesn't mean I hold anything against the village. I think it's a beautiful village."

Sakura only narrows her eyes as Gaara's continues on, reminiscing.

"I'm sure its beauty stems more from our time together there. Just you and me, no one to stand between us. I remember wishing we could just stay there forever."

"It's in crumbles now because of you," Sakura snaps back.

Gaara only tilts his head to this information, humming once again.

"It will grow again, I'll make sure of it. It will flourish again just like the rest of this world once the war is over."

Gaara tilts his eyes up; thinking before a grin spreads on him again.

"You know, I have a decent amount of men from Konoha who follow me now."

His declaration makes Sakura's eyes round and her look only makes Gaara's smile grow.

"Shall I bring them here? Perhaps old friends of yours. You all can reminiscence once again, or maybe they can convince you that I pave the way to a better future."

Sakura only stays silent, yet in her mind, she can't help herself but place familiar faces in Gaara's army.

'Who would defect?' she thinks.

With her thoughts nabbing her attention, she doesn't realize that Gaara draws closer to her until he presses his face close to hers, noses almost grazing. As she stares at his teal orbs his smile turns malice.

"If you want," he whispers, leaning his shoulder against hers. "I can give them to you. Take revenge on them for betraying your village, for killing your friends back home. I'll give you their lives, Sakura."

Sakura attempts a hard slap at Gaara, but stops her hand the moment sand shields his face. His eyes drift toward her lifted palm before his smile settles back to a frown and he pulls his face away from Sakura.

"Bastard," Sakura seethes. "How could you even call yourself a leader when you easily dispose of your men?!"

Gaara simply shuts his eyes and straightens his back as he takes in Sakura's words.

"Come now," he comments. "I only jest. Yet, it's interesting how passionate you've become when it comes to those from Konoha."

"I'm not from Konoha," Sakura hisses.

Gaara takes a moment to look at Sakura; studying her almost before he begins lightly tapping the middle of his forehead and speaking.

"Though, you do look familiar to someone."

Sakura swallows hard.

'Tsunade-sama,' she thinks, wondering where her role in the world is now.

"I suppose it matters not where you're from, Sakura," Gaara finishes. "Though I hope, one day, your secrets become mine and mine yours."

Sakura decides not to backtrack into the conversation. The less she speaks of Konoha, the better. Yet, she does take Gaara's words into consideration.

"Everyone has to keep their secrets," she tells him. "Those that don't are old married couples."

Sakura can't help herself but chortle lightly at her own words, wondering if even they keep their secrets. What doesn't phase her, is the way Gaara stares at her now, with even the faintest of smiles now.

"Married, huh?" he whispers, before settling himself more comfortably in the sand; his eyes on Sakura entirely. "Sakura, how old are you now?"

Her snickers quickly die and Sakura lifts her eyes to recall the time that has passed.

'I'm the same,' she thinks. 'Twenty, but I guess...'

"Somewhere in your thirties, correct?" Gaara speaks. "There's nothing to be ashamed about."

Sakura realizes Gaara his mistakes her muteness for self-consciousness.

"Aa," Sakura murmurs, grimacing once more towards the ocean.

She jumps lightly, not from pain but from surprise, when she feels the faintest pinch on her cheek. Quickly, she looks back at Gaara who holds amusement once again in his eyes.

"Ah?" he murmurs. "So, it isn't a jutsu. You've aged well, Sakura."

Sakura only continues to grimace; trying to hold back the anger that is beginning to rise within her.

'Thirties my ass,' she thinks. 'I'm barely twenty!'

Yet, her lips remain purse.

"I am twenty-one now," Gaara adds, nodding towards Sakura.

Sakura nods back, but realizes Gaara waits on her to speak more as he keeps his eyes steady on her.

"Um, congratulations…?" Sakura murmurs, unsure what the man seeks of her now.

She is surprised to see his face soften a bit; even smiling lightly while finding humor.

"Ha," he even manages out, dragging the vowel. "You're an interesting character, Sakura."

"What?" she drawls, not understanding what message he is trying to send her.

Gaara, though, ponders for a moment before shaking his head and turning away from her.

"I am simply pointing out that I am no longer a child. I've accomplished much over these fifteen years."

He looks at her with a small smile but is disappointed to see her hard frown settled on the ground instead.

"I know that you're no longer a child," she whispers, hugging her legs tight.

In her mind, is her inner thoughts.

'I know that very well,' she thinks. 'There is a child I will never see again.'

It is a painful thought for her, it has been these past days. Yet, what surprises her most today is Gaara pointing out her inner thoughts.

"There is nothing I can do to fix that ache in your heart, Sakura," he tells her. "Perhaps, if this will ease your mind some, as adults we can become even closer to each other than when I was younger."

Doubt sits heavy like a stone in her mind to that comment but she does agree that trying is key. Always that chance, always time to convince him to stop all his fighting. So, she brings forth a smile in his direction.

"Best friends, just like when we were younger," she adds.

Gaara nods, though his mindset is in the same direction as hers, there's another option he is beginning to paint in his mind.

"I believe we can achieve some sort of deeper connection, in time."

Sakura's eyes narrow, his words confusing her slightly. No doubt there a deep friendship even she is striving towards, but the way Gaara keeps emphasizing on connections leaves her puzzled.

'What more does he want from me?' she wonders.

A low rumble echoes along the shoreline and its power draws both Sakura and Gaara's attention. They each turn their gaze to stare at the tall mountain.

"What is happening?" Sakura whispers.

Despite her quietness, a certain individual is keen to her words.

"A riot," Gaara tells her, eyes still set on the mountain.

A scowl forms on his face the moment Sakura looks at him and she recalls Temari saying the same.

'Temari!' Sakura quickly thinks.

"Please," Sakura begins, earning back Gaara's gaze. "I asked Temari to leave me behind and find out what is happening in the mountain. Please, don't harm her in anyway for leaving me on my own. I had told her my intention was not to get off this island."

Sakura is forced to beg, but given the circumstances, the person's life she begs for, Temari's life is one Sakura would bow down to the lowest of people if they would just spare her. Gaara, despite him being her sibling, is no different for Sakura.

Gaara just crooks his neck; his smile spreading once more. Sakura places herself in a position now that the redhead is all too familiar with. Whether it is lives, villages, material wealth, all of it he has seen many times with people groveling at his feet for. They are willing to give so much of themselves that the idea Sakura does this now excites him and makes his smile grow bigger and sinister.

'What will you give me in return?' he thinks of the words he is about to spill out to Sakura.

A big part of him wants to watch her sink into an ocean of corruption he can throw her in. Sink or swim, he will tell her and whilst reminding her that there is another life she carries on her back. She has to swim, has to please him before he will offer his hand for her out of the heavy waters, and even then he will ask for more; gratitude will have to come next.

Yet, as Sakura's emerald gaze lingers longer on his own teal eyes, something within him, something very small, calls out to him. Reminding him that this is Sakura, the real one, and that he owes this woman so much more than his corrupted thoughts. She had offered her hand many times to his younger self in return for nothing, and in a sense, it is a fraction of what he can offer her now. Begging, pleading, doing as he asks, he begins to realize is not what he wants from the rosette. She is different than the rest of the world.

"If that is what you want, Sakura. Consider it done," Gaara merely says before narrow eyes return to the ocean. "It is twice you've saved that woman. I would advise you to remind her of that."

Sakura merely shakes her head.

"Her life is not in my hands, nor should they be in yours. She should be free to do as she pleases," Sakura comments, making the redhead sneer.

"This is war and I am her leader," Gaara reminds Sakura.

"She is her own person. You have no right to decide when she lives or dies. She is your family," Sakura reminds Gaara.

Sakura is surprised to see Gaara lean back as he chuckles; teeth showing off.

"You are one interesting character, Sakura," is all he says. "It should irk me that you don't recall what I've told you of family, but I merely find it amusing. You're so..."

Gaara's mouth stops for a moment and he stares out into the ocean while in deep thought. Eventually, his neck slowly cranes to face the rosette and Sakura frowns when she spots amusement in a dark sneer Gaara suddenly gives her. It tells her he is unsure how to feel about what he is about to label her.

"Defiant," he mouths, with the slightest bite to his lip.

For a leader, the word itself is taboo. Things are meant to be accordingly, people are suppose to follow order, defiance is treated with backlash and consequence. Defiance can also lead to ones death. It's no wonder he sneers as he tells Sakura this. For him, it has been his way for many years. Fear and power has put him in a position where disobedience only comes from the enemies he calls rebels and no one else.

Yet now, Sakura can somewhat understand where that amusement stems from. Change is happening before him. She sits here now next to him in peace, something he probably hasn't experienced for quite some time. Still, aside from the rebels, she is another who goes against his words, who tells him he is in the wrong, and someone who is trying to change him. In a sense, it's almost an unhealthy relationship given he finds some slight enjoyment in her opposition. Then again, he had said entertainment was scarce here, perhaps it is a feeling that will flee in time. Still, Sakura can't stop herself from saying some peace then.

"I'm in a position to believe you'd not have me any other way."

She realizes her assumption of him is correct, for a grin spreads once again as his eyes shake in anticipation.

"Change is good," is what he first tells her. "Plus, victory will taste so much sweeter once I see you crack. I can't imagine the euphoria I will feel once delicious defiance turns into obedience."

Sakura merely shakes her head; turning her eyes away from Gaara. The topic of this conversation feels almost too personal and it makes her just slightly uncomfortable.

"You forget who I am," Sakura mutters. "I went up against the Kazekage and paraded you around the village while we held hands. Despite the warnings, the looks, and the threats, I defied everyone who told me to just give up on you, or to hide you from plain sight."

Along with stubborn, Sakura realizes that defiant is another of her middle names. Her eyes fall back to the ocean, watching the tide begin to slowly retreat while Gaara watches her in silent anxiousness. His hard frown has returned, but he watches the rosette with past memories of their time in the village. It may have taken awhile, but he analyzes all those happy trips they took together. He opens his mouth, to tell her that cherished moments like that can be renewed. Far better things can come, he wants to say, but is stopped when Sakura turns her gaze back to his and asks a question of her own.

"Shouldn't you be there?" Sakura asks, nodding her head behind her and towards the mountain. "Shouldn't you be helping with whatever is going on?"

Gaara swallows his past words before bringing forth new ones.

"My men have it under control," he states. "Do not worry."

Sakura grimaces.

"It's not that I'm worried," she says. "Just curious. You take it so leisurely, but a fight may be happening and your men overtaken."

Gaara, again, just shakes his head as he stares back at the ocean.

"The prisoners in there are not warriors of any kind. They know of no combat."

Sakura's heart fall upon hearing that, and she suddenly understands why the prisoners were so quiet within their cages. They learned of no means to escape.

"Prisoners who can fight…?" Sakura's vague question is easily understood by Gaara.

"Killed," he states with no emotion. "Though it is from their choice. Those who don't join me-"

"-are murdered," Sakura finishes with disgust laced around her words.

Gaara nods, and Sakura realizes then that she should be aware of such. War always holds these sort of consequences, and it is why villages seldom call out for it.

"Then, what are these prisoners held for?" Sakura asks, curiosity holding onto her.

Gaara sighs, as if the conversation bores him. He even lifts his eyes towards the sky before speaking.

"Most are just kept in there. Some are put into work, some are used in trade to the rebels. A man for a man. Some..."

Sakura turns her head towards Gaara once he stops his sentence. His gaze is set hard towards the sky, and he narrows his eyes.

"Some…?" Sakura tries to usher him along.

Gaara's eyes return to Sakura's and in that brief moment Sakura swears she can see an emotion Gaara is trying to keep down. Something she had seen in his childhood, but not expected to see right now; Guilt. However, as quick as it flashes, it disappears and he is able to finish his sentence.

"Concubines," he adds. "For the men here."

Sakura sneers and she is quick to tell him her feelings.

"You're sick."

Gaara, surprisingly, smirks at Sakura and leans his hands behind him.

"Bite your tongue now than later," he tells Sakura with a smile still. "just because they are used in that sense does not mean I indulge in such acts with prisoners."

"You're still sick for allowing it," Sakura comments. "Those sort of acts are done by the lowest of low!

Gaara's smirk only grows.

"Ho?" he hums lightly. "Shall I punish those who do those acts then?"

Sakura's eyes narrow to Gaara's attitude, yet before she can answer, Gaara licks his lips before his eyes widen and he grins as he speaks.

"Shall I off Temari now? Her life you strive to keep alive but she is the guiltiest of them all!"

Sakura knows Gaara's sudden excitement stems from the anticipation on waiting on her reaction. She does not deny that hearing Temari does such a thing rocks her heart, but she does her best to keep her appearance calm so as to not let Gaara feed off from her shock. Instead, she merely shakes her head as thoughts come to mind.

'Maybe it's something more,' Sakura thinks. 'Maybe Temari has a connection to someone in there. Maybe that's why she rushed to stop that riot...'

Sakura simply narrows her eyes towards Gaara.

"Don't you dare hurt anyone else," is what she tells Gaara.

Gaara looks almost taken aback by Sakura's answer and the rosette sighs and shakes her head.

"This is terrible," she finally admits. "Sitting here with you, and learning more about you. What you've become, what you do, how the world is now… I was hoping to see some sort of understanding of why today is what it is. I was hoping to understand you better, to possibly become your friend once again. To rebuild our relation."

Unbeknownst to her, Gaara's heart races as Sakura pours out more of her feelings. Yet, as the rosette shakes her head in disappointment, does a small panic begin to brew within Gaara. A feeling he forsook and curses upon it's return today.

'Sakura...' he hisses in his mind, but listens to her words still.

"It just feels so pointless now and so hopeless. You've become someone I cannot understand nor do I wish to."

Gaara is still silent, but his heart races more once Sakura stands herself tall and stares out towards the ocean.

"I loved you, once. Never would I have let go that night all those years ago knowing it was going to be the last night I get to hold you in my arms. I went on thinking we would have many more days of laughter, of joy, and of peace. Instead, here I am now. Wishing things to be different..."

Sakura shuts her eyes then and tries to focus back on the little boy.

"Wishing I could just go back..."

Gaara's eyes widen then, for an understanding finally surfaces within him. An understanding of Sakura's pain. Once, he had told himself how he wished he could go back. As soon as his mind convinced him that there was no way, he set forth down a path that led to this future. It took time, but he accepted how things were now and chased after what it was his heart sought. Sakura, he realizes now, still holds on like he once did.

'This is how she will learn,' something dark in his mind echoes. 'Accepting pain now will teach her what direction she needs to take next. To let go of the past...'

Yet, something else grips his heart tight, and panic is still settled in his stomach as he stares up at Sakura's blank face. If only their roles could have been reversed long ago, he thinks. If only, during his troubled times, had she appeared and told him to hold on and not let go of their past. Seeing Sakura now, doing exactly what he had to do all those years ago, makes his heart quake and his thoughts are tuned out.

It will be an act he will regret later, but if it means keeping her now. A chance to earn back her smile, her acceptance, her love, he will say what he wishes he could have heard from Sakura years ago.

"Stay with me," he whispers to her.

Sakura's eyes widen to his small plea and as she turns her head to look down at Gaara, she is shocked at his flushed skin and worried eyes. Inside of her, her heart races, for it is the same eyes the child would give her. A gaze she was probably going to receive once she told him she had to leave him forever.

"I don't want you to leave me again," Gaara's voice grows. "Hate me if you must. Keep your disobedience and attempts of changing me. Despise what I do, but do not forsake me once more."

She shuts her eyes as her face tightens and lips quiver. She knows he is learning to manipulate her, she knows her love is too strong to depart now, and for that reason she knows she can't leave yet. Not when he shares these rare moments of understanding, and above that, not when she still feels in her heart that she can change him. Worst yet, he still puts blame on her for her disappearance.

"Damn you," is all she musters now.

Yet, it is enough to make Gaara smile, and slowly he rises to his own feet. Her admittance now, that she cannot leave him behind, swells his pride and ego. He is darkness, manipulation, and views their interactions more as a game then his genuine feelings try to convey. Even if there was a moment of worry inside of him from her turning her back once again to him it is forgotten, or mistaken as his plan, as he strides towards Sakura with the knowledge that he can sway her.

In time, he hopes that small sway will put her in a place Gaara sees fit. For now, he is still unsure what place he wants her in. By his side, he can definitely agree on, but as what, he still plays in his mind.

Right now, as he strolls towards her, excited to see her crack slightly under his words; the thought that he is older and with a wise mindset likes hers now, plays more in his mind than him simply viewing her as his old nanny. It is convincing enough to make him boldly step behind her and wrap one hand into hers, as soon as his fingers tangle with her own, he presses himself closer to her frame; trying to mold her body into his.

Sakura instantly stiffens and pulls away from the redhead and his close body. She breaks the contact of their hands and instead hits him with startled, and questioning, eyes. His small, sly smirk grows as he spots her uncertainty.

"What are you doing?" she whispers.

Gaara simply shuts his eyes and takes a step closer towards Sakura. His smile grows when she steps away from his approach.

"Sakura, I'm no longer a child."

Her heart falls then, along with her eyes does her jaw open wide, and the assumptions she thought were too bizarre to even fathom finally come forth. It's as if her realization is known by the redhead as well, for his smile falls to a frown looking down at the rosette and he inches his way closer towards her to narrow the gap between them.

"I always held on to your lessons. Your teachings that you were only my friend, and nothing else."

"Right," Sakura quickly agrees, eyes warning him to watch his next words. "We were friends, nothing more."

Her words make Gaara's grin reappear, and he widens his eyes so as to mock her.

"Friendships can grow," he whispers, beginning to reach for the rosette. "They can blossom to a closeness that-"

"Stop," Sakura firmly speaks, cutting him off.

As he falls silent she takes a step away from him.

'His view on me...' she thinks, unsure whether Gaara is genuine or mocking her now. 'It's changing.'

Time apart will do that, she realizes. A boy with an unsteady heart and mind would begin to question their relationships in the past. The only love he claims to have gotten, and it makes Sakura wonder if he is beginning to view her romantically.

'He couldn't,' she at first thinks. 'He can't! He clearly holds no sympathy or love. He-!"

He reaches for her once more and her shock allows him to wrap a hand into hers again.

'He is very confused!' Sakura realizes.

A past love. Did this occurrence just suddenly happen within him, or did he morph her into a romantic partner years ago, Sakura wonders.

"You're the only one who truly cares for me," he whispers, pulling her closer towards him.

'He doesn't understand our relationship,' Sakura thinks. 'He's morphed genuine kindness as romance. He's-!'

Sakura can't even bring her thoughts to match with his and quickly she pulls away once more, but not before realizing that he had pulled her in to a gentle embrace. She just shakes her head when his lazy eyes meet with hers.

"No," she tells him. "That is not a relationship I will have with you."

Her heart sinks more when she is only met with his cruel looking smile.

"I'd expect nothing less from you Sakura," he tells her. "For you, I want the challenge."

If it weren't for his sand Sakura would raise a hand to his face for that comment, instead she sneers in disgust.

"This isn't a game, Gaara!" she cries out. "You're talking about deep emotions and connections. You're talking about actual love! Something I'm still unsure you have in you."

She watches him, as if he is in a daze, reach for her pink locks. She allows him to slide his fingers through them but keeps her angry eyes settled on him still.

"Let me show you, Sakura," he tells her. "I can show you the love I had for you. I can show you the love I have for you now, and I can let it grow. I can give you whatever it is you want. I can make a world for just you and me."

Sakura's eyes widen to his claims and steps herself farther away from Gaara's dream-like state and venturing hands.

"Don't," she says while shaking her head, and looks at him with almost a desperate plea in her face. "Don't ruin what we had. Don't turn it into something weird."

"Wasn't it always?!" he grins mad.

He advances and Sakura turns and sets her sights on running far. Yet, the man who drives her away surprisingly speaks to keep her there.

"Wait," he tells her. "Don't."

Looking back at him, Sakura watches as Gaara shuts his eyes and draws in a deep breath. Once his eyes open, the dream disappears, and his hard eyes and frown are set on Sakura.

"Do not run," he tells her.

Sakura swallows hard, but as Gaara looks to have regained composure she keeps her feet set. Still, she can't help but ask him.

"Why?"

He answers her, and to hear the familiar phrase come from Gaara makes her knees shake and her entire mind fill with dread.

"If you run," he begins to warn her, smile growing as if the thought alone excites him, "I will chase you."

He draws closer and offers Sakura a hand to help her retract her steps towards him before speaking again.

"...and I will catch you, little blossom."