After a long, emotional weekend... Monday rolled around. Hailey found herself walking into the 21st District.
Although, Hailey really didn't feel like working... she knew that she was needed, as they were already a person down with Vanessa being off on vacation. Besides, Hailey didn't know how much more sitting at home just thinking she could do.
The first person Hailey was greeted by, was Trudy.
"Morning Upton!" Trudy said.
Hailey just nodded, forcing a fake smile.
"You feeling okay, cause' you look like hell?" Trudy asked.
Hailey nodded again. "Long weekend, but I'm fine."
"Good." Trudy said, staring looking rather unconvinced.
Slowly, Hailey makes her way into the Bullpen. The Team is already gathered around Voight, who's clearly laying out the plans for the day. Everyone turned to look at Hailey, even though the makeup covered any visible bruises well, she still felt like they all would know somehow.
"Hailey, nice of you to join us." Voight said, with a smirk.
"I'm sor..." Hailey started, but was quickly cut off.
"You're good. We've got a case, are you feeling better?" Voight asked.
Hailey nodded. "Yes Sarge."
"Good." Voight said, before looking back to the White Board & continuing his briefing.
Voight explained the details of the most recent drug bust that the Team was about to make.
"Now, let's hit it!" Voight said.
With that, the Team headed off to their vehicles. Hailey was the first one out of the Bullpen. Jay followed closely behind her. The partners drove to the bust together, but the ride was awkward & quiet. Hailey stared out the window, her mind was somewhere else. She didn't even notice Jay's concerned looks that he kept shooting her way.
Once they arrived to their located, it was time to wait. Hailey still hadn't said hardly a word, her eyes still fixed out the passenger window. Jay wasn't sure what was wrong, but he knew something was really off with his partner. It was Jay who finally broke the silence.
"So... how was your weekend?" Jay asked.
Hailey didn't respond, eyes still fixed out the window.
"Hailey!" Jay called her name a little louder & Hailey jumped, quickly snapping her head around towards him. There was a strange look in her eyes... fear maybe?
"Hey, I'm sorry..." Jay started. "I didn't mean to..."
"No, Jay it's okay..." Hailey said. "What was it you said?"
"I asked how your weekend was?" Jay repeated.
Hailey felt her emotions getting all jumbled up already. She could feel the tears starting to well up in her eyes, so she immediately looked away. "It was fine... it was nice." she answered, finally.
"Good." Jay said. "Everyone was a little worried when you called in sick, but... Vanessa said it might have had something to do with a date?"
The question kind of slipped out of Jay's mouth before he could stop them. The truth was, Jay wasn't even sure that he wanted to know the answer...
Hailey inhaled sharply. She should have known Jay was going to ask her about the weekend, she should have had a better answer thought up to prepare.
"Well?" Jay asked, when he didn't get a response.
"Yeah... something like that." Hailey mumbled, still staring out the window.
"I hope you had a good time... you deserve it." Jay said, genuinely... although, in reality it really bothered him knowing that Hailey had been out on a date. He wasn't quite sure why. They were "just partners" & Hailey had a right to go out with anyone she wanted. She didn't owe him any explanation. Still, it stung to think about her out on a date with another man, as much as he hated to admit it.
Before the conversation could get any more awkward that it already was, their suspect pulled up.
Hailey picked up her radio. "I got eyes on him Sarge."
"Hold back & let it play out." Voight said, over the radio.
As the deal was about to take place, the dealer pulled out a gun & aimed it at the CI's head.
"Let's move, now!" Voight's voice boomed over the radio.
Jay & Hailey were the closest, therefore they arrived first on scene.
"Chicago PD, put your hands in the air!" Jay shouted. The CI immediately raised his hands, but the dealer ran.
Jay & Hailey took off after him on foot. Jay radioed in their located, tripping over a board as he did so. He fell, quickly trying to pull himself back up. Hailey was still in pursuit of the dealer. She cornered him in an alley.
"Chicago PD, put your hands where I can see em'" Hailey shouted.
The dealer turned around quickly, pointing his gun at Hailey. "What you gonna' do, shoot me?" he asked.
Hailey froze, she suddenly felt dizzy. Her breathing was becoming ragged. She tried to ground herself, this was not the time... but seeing the gun pointed directly at her, brought her back to the attack. That's when Jay ran up, also raising his gun at the suspect, who still had his gun aimed at Hailey.
"One more step & I shoot!" the dealer yelled.
"It's over, put the gun down." Jay shouted.
"Drop your weapon now or I will shoot!" Hailey shouted, her voice cracking.
Jay heard it & immediately looked towards Hailey. That's when he noticed her fast breathing, her hands were shaking, hell... her whole body was shaking. This wasn't good.
"You don't want to shoot, do you sweetheart?" the dealer said with a laugh.
"Sweetheart..."
Hailey's whole world started spinning, her vision blurred, she suddenly couldn't breathe at all. Her body was going through the motions, but she felt as though she wasn't getting air. Seeing this, the suspect laughed and took a step closer. A loud shot rang out from the roof top above. The dealer dropped dead, right there from Adam's single gunshot to the head.
"You good?" Adam shouted from above.
Jay looked up. "Yeah, we're good!" Jay shouted to Adam, before calling it in over the radio. "5021 George, roll an ambo to 1456 Lincoln, in the alley for shots fired by the Police, subject down."
Then, Jay's concerned gaze immediately went to his partner...
Hailey couldn't breathe, she felt sick, felt like she was going to pass out... her vision was blurry. This can't be happening here! She turned & staggered towards the wall of the alley. Jay was by her side in an instant.
"Hailey..." Jay breathed, placing his hand on her shoulder to ground her. Instantly regretting it, as she flinched at his touch & pulled back. A look of plain terror in her eyes. That's when it clicked, his partner was having a panic attack. Jay had dealt with them before, especially after he'd returned from his tour with the Rangers.
Jay gently took Hailey's hand in his, she pulled back but he kept a firm hold... gently pulling her down to a sitting position. He knelt beside, still holding her hands in his.
"Hailey..." Jay said, softly. The look of fear was still there & Jay knew that whatever Hailey was seeing, right now... it wasn't him, so he spoke a little louder. "Hailey, it's me... Jay. It's Jay. Hailey, I need you to listen to me... listen to my voice. It's me, it's just me... listen, I need you to focus on my voice and look at me."
Hailey was still trying to pull away, but she was so dizzy and weak...
"Come on, Hailey..." Jay whispered. "Focus on my voice, look at me Hailey... it's Jay."
It seemed to be working, Jay seemed to be getting through to Hailey. Slowly she looked at him, their eyes met, her eyes were filled with tears that were now freely falling.
"Good, now listen Hailey... keeping looking at me, match my breathing." Jay said, softly.
"Can't..." Hailey managed to cry out.
"Yes you can." Jay said, matter of factly. "Look into my eyes, match my breathing... you've got this."
After a few moments, Hailey managed to get her breathing under control. She pulled away from Jay, buried her face into her shaking hands, her entire body trembled as sobs washed over her body. Jay stayed right there beside her. He placed his hand gently on her shoulder, rubbing small circles in an attempt to comfort her. At first, she flinched at his touch but relaxed after a moment. They stayed there like that for a few beats, until the ambo & rest of the Team ran up.
Hailey stood up quickly, walking away... she didn't want anyone to see her puffy eyes. Jay stayed where he was for a moment, watching her walk away somewhat it shock. He was confused by what had just happened, but sensing she didn't want the rest of the Team to know... he didn't say anything about her outburst to anyone else.
After a few moments, Hailey returned, seemingly getting her emotions in check. She was managed to give her report at the scene. Jay listened as she did so, taking note of what she said so that their stories would match up in the report. Hailey didn't mention her panic attack. Once it was over, she walked to Jay's Truck... where she waited until he gave his report & joined her.
When Jay climbed into the Truck, Hailey was sitting in the passenger seat... once again staring out the window.
"Hey..." Jay said, softly. "You good?"
Hailey didn't turn to look at him, instead she just nodded, not trusting that her voice wouldn't crack at that moment. She didn't want to talk about this, right now. She just wanted this day to be over & to go home.
"Hailey... what happened back there?" Jay asked.
Hailey just shook her head. "Can we not do this, right now?" she cried, her voice did indeed crack when she spoke.
Jay sighed. "Okay..." he said, softly. The events that had just unfolded left Jay scared, seeing his normally strong, no non-sense partner break down like that was just breaking his heart. He had seen Hailey cry, a couple times, but nothing like that. He knew something was very, very wrong.
The ride back to the 21st District was even more quiet than on the way to the bust. Hailey didn't say another word. Her whole was still spinning, she lay slumped against the passenger window of Jay's Truck. Jay watched her concernedly, his mind was racing. There were so many different scenarios playing in his head. He needed to know what was going on with Hailey and whatever it was, he wanted to help her through it. However, he also didn't want to push her and he knew that now was not the time or place to discuss it... after all, she had asked him not to talk about it, right now. He had to respect her enough to give her the time and space she needed.
Once the Team returned to the District, everyone did their paperwork before going home for the day. Hailey was the first one done and she had rushed out quickly, before Jay even had a chance to speak a word to her.
After shift, Hailey returned to her apartment. The first thing she did, was climb into a hot shower... where she stayed for almost an hour. Once Hailey was done, she headed straight to bed. She was so tired, but she knew that sleep wouldn't come. Still, her head was pounding and she felt awful. All she wanted to do was lay down. She thought about ordering food, but even thought of eating made her more nauseous than she already was. Hailey hadn't eaten anything since her attack, she knew that she should eat... but she just couldn't bring herself to do it.
Hailey knew that she had to pull herself together, because what happened at work that day... simply could not happen again. She couldn't let it happen again. Her mind drifted to Jay, to the scared look on his face while she was coming back from her panic attack. Hailey knew, without a doubt, that Jay wasn't just going to let it go... even though he didn't push her that afternoon. She knew Jay, she knew that he always knew when something was wrong.
Just then, Hailey heard a loud knock on the door... she didn't even have to look, for she already knew who it was...
TBC...
