RWBY's Commentary on Son of the Mask (Part 3 - Finale)

Ruby starts off the next scene in the movie with Tim trying to change Alvey's diaper, "So, Jamie tries something different for a change; actually being a good father, by the very least changing the baby's diaper.", before to the tune of The Beautiful Blue Danube, the baby suddenly pees, but with multiple streams as the father struggle to not make a mess caused by the baby's pee by trying to fill it with cups, much to the disgust of team RWBY.

"Why are you making us think about a baby with three penises? What- twisted pigshit does that?!", argues Yang.

Then the scene shows the baby stopped peeing, relieving Tim, before the baby smiles and suddenly a gush of pee sprays on Tim, which Blake jokes, "Isn't that funny? A FAMILY picture!"

"So Loki finally finds the baby and tries to force him to tell him where the Mask is.", Weiss synopsized, the next scene showing Loki cornering Tim and the baby, Loki about to use his powers on them with a red fireball while having an awful green godlike face.

Ruby comments too, "Once again, you gotta really admire his fashion sense. Must be a homage to when KISS performed on St. Patrick's Day.", before the next part of the scene shows Loki throwing a giant grenade at Tim and Alvey, but the baby helps his father by cartoonishly making a shield with his hands, the grenade exploding and saving Tim and the baby.

"But it's okay, because the baby likes his father now. Yeah right the fuck out of nowhere again with no goddamn explanation, and Odin possesses Jamie's body to tell Loki he's fed up.", said Yang, a next part of the scene showing Loki's green godlike face turning back to normal as Tim was possessed by Odin, who tells Loki he is stripped of his powers and banished to the land of mortals, before he uses his hand to shoot lightning bolts out at Loki, electrifying him to the point his hair turns white.

Blake complains afterwards, "So he's a mortal now, which doesn't add up because the baby does all this stuff with the dumpsters and, survives it, somehow. But what makes even less sense is Loki is stripped of his powers just so he can convince Odin literally in two scenes later to give them back. Yeah, it's just two scenes later, it's like a couple minutes! Meaning there was no point to take the powers away, expect to make the movie go even longer."

"Because, yeah! That's what we need! This freaky as fuck movie to go even longer! Let's celebrate with more creepy ass imagery!", agreed and sarcastically comments Weiss.

When showing a scene of Loki using his powers to turn Tim's neighbour's face into a giant nose, this disgusts Ruby and Yang, and when Tim's wife Tonya seemingly came home during the next part of the scene, revealing to be disguised by Loki horrendously, it too disgusts Blake and Weiss, and when Tim checks the baby Alvey to show Loki's face on it with a creepy look, the team RWBY shrieks and cowers in fear, covering their faces from the disturbing images.

"God, it's bad enough we have the Schwarzenegger baby from Junior!", Yang mentions.

Ruby questions about the ridiculous comparison, "Can you imagine showing those two back-to-back?", before a short moment she realizes, "DON'T SHOW THOSE TWO BACK-TO-BACK!", before the comparison shows between the Schwarzenegger baby and the Loki baby from the respective Junior and Son of the Mask movies, with Spongebob horror music added along to it.

Suddenly, Ruby starts to have a heart attack because of the horrifying comparison between the two disturbing babies, the message saying, 'Heart Attack! Take Medication!', making Yang, Blake and Weiss worry a lot as Ruby sways in pain and slams her right hand on her legs with her other hand holding her chest! In a rush, Yang quickly gets Ruby emergency pills, opening it quickly and putting one in her mouth, while Blake and Weiss help by giving her some water to wash it down, before Ruby's heart attack stops, saving her life.

"That...was...extreme...", Ruby pants, after experiencing her first heart attack, due to being scared about that comparison part a lot, "I feel okay now."

Yang said, "Glad your sister and your two friends were there to help you. You would've died. Heart attacks for young people is extremely rare. We never had a heart attack before."

"I'll continue.", Blake says, "So Loki takes the kid, saying if he doesn't get the Mask back soon, he's keeping him. This leads to a delightful moment where Jamie thinks his wife Tonya returned home as Loki and thus beats the loving bajeezus out of her."

The movie shows the next scene with Tim thinking his wife Tonya is disguised as Loki too, but actually isn't, as he beats her up, causing Weiss to joke like the other girls earlier, "A FAMILY picture.", which the three girls smile at her for the joke.

Ruby was okay to comment the next scene, "So they find the Mask and decide to do a trade, but wouldn't you know it? In the less than three minutes of screen time, Loki decides he likes the kid now, and wants to keep him forever."

"But, the always-popular crotch shot...", described Yang.

The scene showing the dog charging and leaping as it bites Loki's crotch, causing the god of mischief to scream in pain as his eyes bulge out, causing team RWBY to all say, "A FAMILY picture!"

"What? It's a crotch shot.", Ruby shrugs with the other girls, "A bit of a cliche, don't you think? Especially the part when his eyes bulge to the point where it's seen outer space.", before shuddering to the last part.

Blake then adds, "Anyway, the always-popular crotch shot gets the Mask out of his hands and back onto Jamie.", the same scene showing Loki letting go of the Mask, Tim catching it and turning into his Mask form once again, Loki trying to escape in a limo with Tim's Mask form turning their family car into an awesome one.

"So they work into the Charlie Sheen mobile, which to be fair, that car's exquisite, and drive on over to the final showdown.", synopsized Weiss, the next scene showing Tim's Mask form confronting Loki in the arena, with a boxing arena there.

Ruby then criticized, "Will you turn your wide-angle lens down?! You've had it pushed to maximum since frame one!", the scene showing Tim's Mask form beating Loki in boxing into a suitcase, and the protagonist, his wife and the baby about to escape but Tim slams into a brick wall that Loki summons with a giant pencil.

"Now why didn't they make a toy out of that? It's such a charming, delightful image I'm sure kids would flock to- DON'T SHOW THAT AGAIN.", Yang thought out loud.

Blake says, "So they decide they've evenly matched and figure the best thing to do is let the baby decide where he goes.", the scene showing Tim putting Alvey in between him and Loki, competing which who gets the baby's attention.

"I'm just the mother, so I clearly have no say in this.", mocks Weiss about the wife, the next part of the scene showing that Loki's baby has turned into some sort of Beetlejuice-carnival placement, freaking the four girls out.

The four team members of RWBY say, "If we don't look at it, it can't hurt us! If we don't look at it, it can't hurt us!", the next part of the scene showing Tim removing the Mask and turning back to his normal form, finally getting the baby's attention as he comes to Tim.

"So his CGI mouth chooses his father. Again, the mother we guess weighed no part in this decision. And we even get some family bonding with Odin and Loki, after the latter tries to kill Tim.", explains Ruby, the next part showing Tim telling Odin and Loki lessons that Loki will always be his son, no matter if he punishes or banishes him, before the two gods leave with the Mask.

Yang smirks, "Well, gee, if only Jamie Kennedy were there in the Avengers. I don't wanna know what would happen if he was there. Nordic god psychiatrist?"

"So everything seems to be great now. Heck, Jamie even has a new idea for a TV show with motion-capture and CGI animation.", Blake says, "Much like The Polar Express, Beowulf and A Christmas Carol."

Weiss continues, "Yeah, that does sound like a huge TV show, doesn't it? Well, we did have this other dumb idea about kids collecting Pocket Monsters (Pokemon) to defeat evil, but this, this is really gold.", before the end of the movie shows the baby winking, ending the movie.

"Thank god the evil is over!", relieves Team RWBY finally.

Ruby and Yang says the first part of their last review for the overall of the movie, "You remember how Tarsem directed The Cell? A poorly made movie that dived into the mind of a serial killer? Well, Tarsem got it wrong. THIS is the poorly made movie that dives into the mind of a serial killer! It just forgot to mention the serial killer part! Not only is the movie horribly written, awkwardly acted, filled with lame as hell effects, and using WAY too much goddamn wide-angle lens, it is scary! Scary, scary, scary, scary, scary, scary, scary, scary, scary!"

"We feel unclean, we mean, we can destroy this movie all we want, but it will never get rid of the images that it has planted in here! They won't haunt us, but nobody should ever have to see the terrifying terror that this movie has produced!", Blake and Weiss says the last overall of the movie.

Then Ruby removes the disc of Son of the Mask out of the DVD player and puts it back in the case, holding the DVD, "And they're not going to if I have to say anything about it!"

The four girls then got out of their chairs and stood near the dorm room window, Yang then saying, "From Hell's heart, I throw you the fuck...out!", as the four altogether prepare and think they threw the DVD out the window...

"What the...?", Blake and Weiss question, before the four girls were shocked to see the disc got out of the DVD case of Son of the Mask and is placed back in the DVD player, restarting the movie non-stop through horrendous parts of the movie.

Ruby freaks out, "Oh my god! It's playing again! It's going over and over and over! Oh, my god! Can somebody stop it? CAN SOMEBODY STOP IT?!"

All of a sudden, the mysterious red portal appears again and it reveals to be Raven again, who has her sword weapon and her Grimm-like mask on.

"Stand back, team RWBY!", Raven told the girls.

Yang presumes in surprise, "Mom!"

"I'll handle this.", the brave mother of Yang said to them as she stood in front of the four girls with Ruby supporting with the remote, saying in a Lord of the Rings fashion, "You shall not pass OR play...", as a couple small explosions appear caused by the demonic DVD. "I am a member of Team STRQ, leader of a thousand tribes! CGI should not avail you, film of boredom! Go back to the cutting room shadows!", she spoke out loud towards the replaying movie, more small explosions happening. "YOU SHALL NOT PASS OR PLAY!", she shouts, before pulling out her red sword from her sheath, towards the TV with Ruby trying to turn off the TV...

...

...nothing happens.

Raven tries to use her sword to turn the movie off, but to no avail. She removes her Grimm-like mask and examines why it isn't happening.

"Uh, Raven? How many times have you done this?", Ruby asks.

The mother of Yang answers, "Well...once. Including now. Girls, I told you you should've watched Gremlins or Game of Thrones, because it would be better to-"

BOOM!

A explosion burst of flames erupts from the TV and about to come towards the team RWBY and Raven, the four girls screaming with Raven angrily shocked by this with her sword at the ready...

"STOP!"

The voice booms, causing the explosion of fire from the TV, that's near the five threatening burn them, to implode, the movie and TV turned off.

The five were shockingly surprised and wondering at this, as we see the person who had said it is putting the disc of Son of the Mask back in the case.

Salem, who is with Neo and Cinder.

"Ah, yes. Another typical viewing.", Salem presumes.

Raven greets unimpressed, "Salem."

"Raven. Just stopped by to get my movie for Neo.", explained the goddess.

Ruby says, "We knew it! You own that horrible movie."

"And hello, Neo and Cinder.", greeted Raven, still unimpressed.

Cinder simply says, "Charmed.", while Neo waves hello.

"Is everything fine in that castle of yours?", sarcastically says Raven.

Salem answers, "Yes, it is. Still trying to take over the world, I guess."

"Well, I guess the DVD problem's gone, girls. I best be going now. Yang, my darling, I hope you and your friends have a wonderful day. I'll see you later.", says Raven as she says goodbye to Team RWBY, leaving through the red portal.

After she leaves, Ruby explained to Salem, "Well, we were watching this movie reviewing it, and I guess that movie is hellish and terrible...?"

"You girls must've found that movie.", Salem says, before pinching Ruby's face, "The Son of the Mask movie belongs to me. Don't ever watch that movie again.", before letting go of Ruby's face.

As the three villains were leaving with the Son of the Mask DVD in Salem's hands, Cinder says, "It's best if you watch something else like that Gremlins or Game of Thrones DVD you have there.", while Neo does a 'see you later' look.

After they left too, the four girls sighed, as the four sat back down in their commentary chairs, Ruby finishing off the review, "Again, I'm Ruby..."

"...I'm Yang..."

"...I'm Blake..."

"...and I'm Weiss."

Ruby concludes, "There you have it. That was our review of Son of the Mask...I remember it so you don't have to. See you next time for our next movie review!", finishing the first story of RWBY's nostalgic commentaries.

End of RWBY's Commentary on Son of the Mask

Next up: Ruby and Yang's Commentary on Foodfight!