The Horse with No Name
Chapter Fifteen
Momento Mori: Part Two – Ghost of my Mistakes
He should have done this from the very beginning.
Gohan hadn't had much time to pack. The usual leathery bag that accompanies him on trips away had been his chosen travel companion, stuffed to the brim with various currency, clothes and other bits he thought worth packing. Perhaps, just perhaps, if Gohan keeps on the move long enough, he'll be able to stray far enough from Quell and his eyes. And then maybe someone out there can help him.
If only Gohan could just contact the kais…
No…
The young man brushes his hair back, berating the thought. No kai would help him now, not with who he is. The kais and the gods, particularly gods like Gohan, don't see eye to eye with the likes of kai. They'd have at him just as mercilessly as Quell would, would want to hurt him, punish him –just like all the books say. Is that what happened with Mori? Like Quell, had the kais been after him too?
That's right. Unless the situation becomes dire then the kais are a no-go. Between the books and the note, so much information is out there to make him fear both kais and gods.
"That note…" Gohan whispers into the bottleneck of his beer. Now that it's back on his mind, he can't forget it.
He sips the beverage, looking around the modesty of the wooden tavern. The planet is sparse in population, whilst also being tiny and desolate of plant life. Sand whips around outside in manic dust clouds, attacking the tavern with a ferocity only matched by that in Gohan's heart. The biped-bug man running the bar doesn't look too put off however, and neither do the few patrons sipping at their warm pints and playing darts.
Gohan shudders. Apparently, he's the only one on edge around here.
Why is he so scared all of a sudden? If Quell had wanted him dead, or worse (which is the scarier part), couldn't he have done it already? If it was about the elixir, why didn't he just spike Gohan with it? Not for brotherly affection's sake, he's sure.
Gohan hums, letting his head droop against the bar.
He only moves it again when he realizes that he's currently Gohan and not Mori. God, he's doing that more and more these days –he can't keep up with any of it! Why are the dreams slapping him one after the other? Why do they take up so much of his life now? Is that what it means to be Mori –anxiety and fear?!
When he doesn't have an answer for his questions, he looks for it at the bottom of his bottle, and then at the bottom of a tumbler, and then at the bottom of yet another bottle. He looks and looks, and as the night draws on, he finally concedes that the alcohol is unsurprisingly not making the situation better.
He sulks and feels sorry for himself until he deems it time to sleep.
That night, he stays in the inn above the tavern for the generous price of three shiklots (whatever they are –Gohan had just handed him a lump of gold to be done with it). The bed is fine. And in no time, he's taken a last nightcap and is swallowed into the obscurity of sleep, his body resting, but his mind buzzing with threatening possibilities.
Days pass and Gohan travels from planet to planet, not with a ship but with the device he's been using alongside Rixas for months now. It's a keystone, one which connects to the interplanetary warp-pads throughout the universe. He knows he can't be tracked with it because Quell would never accept such a thing happening to him, and so feels safe warping between the varieties of mortal-operated dwellings over the course of several days.
Different inns come with different beds, all of which brings dream after dream of the brickwork making up Mori's life.
"Lookin' rough, kid," one barkeep says when he pays her.
"You have no idea," he mumbles.
She passes him a key-fob. "The room's on yer right, lovely. Go ge' your head down."
"Thanks…"
The door buzzes open, showcasing a more modern room than he's been used to. There's an adjoining bathroom and closet for all the clothes he didn't bring. His bag is dumped on one side of the bed and Gohan crashes on the other. Sleep finds him quick with dreams sure to follow.
Gohan wasn't convinced that it was a dream at first if only because of the familiar swirl of paranoia battering about in his head. It's something Gohan's been used to for a while now as he travels from place to place, and so when he feels its grasp over Mori, it's like returning to his depressing place of familiarity.
But when Gohan captures Mori's reflection in a passing window, he recognizes the tied blonde hair instead of his usual black spikes. The experience is oddly nauseating, as though he's been on a merry-go-round for far too long, whiplashed from spinning from memory to reality and back to memory.
The nausea subsides momentarily when he spots the reassuring sight of Rixas sitting atop a set of outside steps. It's fleeting, however, as Rixas' expression is so listless, so tightly drawn that it's too foreign to comprehend.
"What are you doing here?" Mori asks. He sounds tired.
"Don't do it, Mori," Rixas deviates, sounding equally drained. "Quell isn't in the mood for it."
Mori scoffs, moving past his brother and up the stairs to, what Gohan now recognizes as, the southern entrance of the estate, a place where Quell still enjoys dwelling to this day.
Rixas' hand reaches out. "I'm being serious. Don't wind him up."
"I have been confined here for years," he drawls not without emotion, "And I have not seen him in about as long, so I shall take this opportunity to have words."
"Mori," Rixas pleads, "I know you're itching to get away but today's not the day for this –we've… we've taken losses on our last expedition. My captain died. I haven't even thought about who to replace him yet, Quell nearly lost an-"
"Yes, yes," Mori spits, "it must be nice to be useful, to leave this wretched place. Do not complain to me about the misfortunes of battle when the most exciting thing to occur around here is a paper-cut."
As bad as it sounds, Gohan does understand Mori's frustrations. Being locked up like a caged bird when you have wings made to fly; it's torture. Mori and Gohan are similar in that way; Gohan gets it.
Rixas apparently does not. "Give him time, brother. Let him breathe after recent events-"
"No, I shan't. He needs telling. Famis died many a year ago now and I refuse to keep living in that shadow."
"It's only to protect you. No, no –don't go in, come back, Mori!"
The door slams in Rixas' face and for a moment Gohan expects it to swing back open and for Rixas to drag him back through. It doesn't happen. If this had happened now, Rixas would have clawed at him and hauled him back to either one of the quarters, perhaps because of the result of this very memory, or at least the repercussion of it. Gohan still has yet to learn how Mori had died.
Still, Mori marches on with a confidence Gohan envies. This is not a man scared of Quell, demonstrated in how he throttles his brother's door open without even knocking.
Quell is centre stage, sitting on a chaise lounge with a generous serving of wine. It spills when the door slams against the wall.
"Mori," he breathes, surprised.
"I am here to have words."
Quell purses his lips, leaning forward to place his glass on the table. "I see. Do all these words have such a bite to them? You seem tightly wound, perhaps even more than I. Do you need something to take the edge off?"
"No. I need you to listen," Mori replies, severe. "No. No wine. Don't pour me –tch, I said that I do not want any-"
"Hush," Quell insists, "drink with me. My day has been tiresome and I would appreciate less backchat on the matter." He gestures to the seat beside him. "Here, sit. Sit down. Drink wine and have your say, but be fast about it so you can console me on today's events."
Mori only accepts the wine to put it down on the table. He does sit however. "Quell," he tries again, slightly less riled. "Remember this; I am not requesting this of you. I am telling you."
Quell raises a brow, tilting his head. "This best not be about what I believe it is about."
"It is. Brother, I implore you. I have been under lock and key for years now, acted as the good prisoner, not once leaving the realm as per your request, but I cannot keep doing this. I cannot keep waiting, cannot keep being repressed-"
"You think I'm repressing you?"
Mori starts listing them off. "You do not allow me train any longer, I am unable to continue my research, to train in ki utilization, leave the realm, meet with-"
"Small sacrifices until we bring Famis' killer to light," Quell snaps dismissively. "I am bored of these conversations, Mori. How many times do we need to discuss this?"
"Until you see sense. Famis' death was so long ago that it is unreasonable for you to still be so cautious. Am I just to be hidden away to protect the collective? Is that my true role? Am I worth so little?"
"Don't be dramatic."
"You treat me like a prisoner!" Mori snaps. It's startling as Gohan's never heard him shout before –never heard his own voice run so cold and hot at the same time. "But no more! I refuse to stay here a moment longer. I'm leaving the estate and I wish not to return for so long as I see fit."
Quell stands immediately. "You are not leaving," he growls, "it is too dangerous for you! Are you really willing to act so selfishly? Do you hate the collective that much?"
"Why do you assume that I am walking to my death? I am not incapable! Just because Famis died, it does not mean that I am sure to follow. I am stronger –wiser!"
"You are nothing of the sort, Mori. You are a child in comparison to Famis! Millennia upon millennia separated you and he was far more cooperating than you. He would have been turning in his grave had he been buried-"
"You righteous fool, brother!" Mori snarls, so heated that Gohan feels sick on his behalf. The red hot energy thrashes within. "You think he was without secrets? You are so imperceptive sometimes! He probably brought his own death upon him. The man played with fire so often that he was bound to get burnt!"
"Oh? You think me uninformed? You think I didn't know what he did in his spare time? What monsters he made; what magic he brewed?" Quell barks a curt laugh. "But then, where was that excuse when he was a boy? The eye covering was not just for show as you well know. He was poisoned, made frail –is that something I should forget? Is that something you want to happen to you?"
"I'm not that weak!"
"Neither was he! Should you walk freely then you would be open to attackers. We're still too vulnerable –we need to properly protect ourselves, act warily."
"Oh, like you had done when I had first mentioned the Zealites? I believe you disregarded me then, and now they are your number one suspect."
"And you throw this in my face?!"
Mori jumps to his feet. "Your arrogance knows no bounds, Quell! You never listen –are you threatened… perhaps by me? Are you so concerned that I might usurp you? Is this why you repress me so?"
"Wh-What? Don't be foolish! We are a collective!"
He clicks his tongue "Are we? I feel more like the peasant dwelling in your shadow."
"Then that is your own demon, brother." Quell's golden eyes thin. "You came to ask permission and I gave you my answer… now leave me before I do something I regret."
"Oh, oh no, Quell. I am not asking permission," the younger hisses, "This is me giving you my goodbyes. I'm leaving… tonight."
"By hell you are!" Just as Mori turns to leave, fingers tightly wrap around his forearm, pinching and digging deeply. It hurts – a lot. Mori yelps, knees buckling, but Quell refuses to let go. "You are not to leave this estate –ever! Should you try to leave then I'll burn every research log in your library, one by one until you see sense!"
Mori cries out but his glare never drops. The anger in his stomach overpowers the pain and somehow, he finds it within himself to spit. Gohan's heart practically stops from the shock of it, watching as the trail of saliva slides down Quell's impassive face.
The grip tightens. Quell is clearly being tested; his temper is being tested. Instead of a backhand across the face, Mori is instead dragged closer, so close that Gohan feels Quell's breath on Mori's cheek.
Silence takes hold for what feels like an eternity.
"Don't ever ask this of me again," Quell then slowly whispers, "the only way you're leaving here without my permission is in a body bag…"
Mori is shaking, most likely from anger because he is yet to confront the looming bout of fear starting sprout.
"Message… received."
"Good."
It's not the last time he dreams of Quell. Many more follow, most of Mori simply watching the man from afar, feeling little and doing just as much. Neither talks to nor even acknowledges one another, and for many years it's tense and uncomfortable for all those who live there. One would think that he'd be able to get away from the man in the solitude of sleep, but no. The ghost of the memories chases him there, whilst the real one is most likely chasing him in today's world.
Quell looked about ready to kill Mori… Perhaps… Perhaps he did.
Gohan brushes his hands through his hair.
Quell had been watching you, Mori. But was he also the one to have killed you?
God, he's so exhausted, and just slightly delirious if he's going to be honest with himself. All of this just seems to be getting worse and worse.
What am I going to do?
He groans.
Quell could be anywhere.
The man is powerful and knows how to get what he wants. If he wants Gohan to drink the elixir (or die) or whatever else the bastard is scheming, he'll eventually manage it. But Gohan won't give up –he refuses to, even when he's not sleeping or eating properly. He doesn't need fuel anyway, right? He's dead.
A tired laugh escapes him.
It's fine. It'll be fine. Maybe Quell won't find him here. This is Planet Geo, a miniscule planet, one of religion and piety. Gohan's actually read a lot about this world. Its ancient keeps and relics were of importance to the old Gods of Revelation and are still prized by kais to this day. With so many relics destroyed by the previous Gods of Revelation, the ones here are guarded and prized, which unsurprisingly attracts a lot of tourists. Some are shown off, whilst others are kept hidden away in the depths of the vaults. And it's actually here, near these vaults, where many kais meet with one another when in the mortal realm, and it's here where Gohan hopes to actually stumble across at least one of them so he can test the waters.
He hates to admit it but, with great unease, Gohan has been pushed to try and pursue the kais. After weeks of aimless travelling, he's ready to reach out. With this great cost apparently comes… another great cost. The rooms are not cheap on this planet. When one lump of gold hadn't been enough, he'd slammed down another and then another.
"You're kidding?" Gohan frazzles. "More?"
The elderly bird-man wiggles his beak. "Sorry, young one. This house is valued higher than your common hostel. Whilst travellers are welcome to Geo, we do not encourage riff-raff with no coin."
"Wow, very devout of you," he snaps, throwing every gold piece he has down. "I can see why the church positively blossoms."
A key is gracelessly thrown to him, only after the gold is snatched up. "No funny business. This is a holy place of standing, not one of those peasant clerical community squalors you might be used to."
"I'll keep that in mind."
The room isn't even that good. Bag deposited, Gohan makes his way along the bustling streets of the city centre. His head remains low, hiding under a hood. There have been a few times that his eyes have drawn attention during his travels now. In the past, people had asked about them –liked them, even, as they're uncommon and full of allure. Gohan understands it. Sometimes, even he can't help but stare at them or even at Rixas' or Quell's.
Hopefully, he doesn't have to worry about seeing Quell's around here –or Rixas' for that matter. As much as he misses his brother, he doesn't want to be force-fed the elixir should he go home. And sure, even though Gohan and Rixas get along, he knows the guy would definitely side with Quell, no question.
As he walks past a gaggle of women, all wearing pale, matching clothing, he pulls at the hood more. They're trying to engage passer-by shoppers and tourists alike with their gospel. Some are singing, others are handing out papers and booklets. When one makes a beeline for him, he ducks into one of the thin alleys, following it all the way round back onto a main street. He knows that as Gohan, he's never been here. But Mori, in fact, has come here many a time and so the memories actually help Gohan manoeuvre around with discretion.
When he emerges, he's faced with the menacing and pointed architecture of a collection of towers. They gesture to the sky in wicked motion, looming over the insignificant mortals and non-mortals alike on the ground below. Sanitized white walls encompass the area, swallowing any daring inch of colour as to give off a strangely uncomfortable aura. Gohan really doesn't like it –Mori hadn't liked it either; it's just so… unnatural.
He walks over the square, walking more into the white and draws closer to the grand entrance of the main building. It reminds him of a museum, but if Mori's memories are anything to go by, this is the main way to enter the building… if the security allows it, that is.
"Invitation?" a bird-person asks of him. The man's cloak is a pristine ivory. Gohan supposes that this must be one of the security workers; even if he's wearing what looks more like a wedding dress than an armour set.
"I was requested in the foyer," Gohan lies smoothly, "and as you know, they don't issue invitations to those attending meetings."
"Mmmm. Fine, then remove your hood."
The young man tightens it if anything. "Y-You have no right to ask that of me."
"But I just did," the security worker replies.
"I know the kais meet here. If you don't let me in then I'll be sure to let them know of the hassle you're giving me. Would you wa-"
"Kid." Gohan's mouth closes. "You don't think I've heard all this spiel before? You're not getting past me. I imagine, like all you young ones, you're eager to catch a glimpse of the kais in action but I cannot allow you just to wander in to celebrity-watch. Do you understand?"
His teeth grit. "I'm not a tourist!"
"Sure you're not. You're a young scholar, a researcher, a preacher; you're whatever you want to call it –and as nice as it is to see the youth trying to follow the ways of the deities, I cannot simply allow you passage. Not unless, I see your identity."
Apparently he has no choice. Gohan breathes hard, glaring. When this guy sees the eyes of a god, it's no doubt going to shake things up. As a worker here, he'd no doubt recognize them.
So Gohan goes to tug on his cloak—his hands brush his hood and then—
"Is there an issue?"
The young man's eyes widen.
No way!
The security worker scrambles. "Supreme Kai, sir, what an honour to see you today! It's just some kid wanting to see the inner workings of the White Tower, please don't worry about it. Go right ahead, sir, please!"
Instead, Shin says, as light and friendly as Gohan remembered him. "So many visitors are curious. But it's refreshing to see a young person wanting entrance. Not enough are willing to learn these days, but I'm sorry to say that we cannot allow that for safety reasons."
"As I said, sir!"
Gohan can't move. He can't breathe. His hands shake, still holding the hood. All he has to do is lower it. He'd wanted to see a kai –and he's found the only one who knows him personally.
"Where are you from?" Shin next asks from beside him. There's the sound of shuffling and Gohan supposes that the kai is trying to get a better look. "Oh, do you only speak the common tongue or-"
"We were just speaking Celestianese," the security worker says, "just a typical fan boy, I imagine. It's nothing to concern yourself with, sir. Please, go ahead."
"Oh… alright then, if you insist."
No!
When Shin turns to walk, Gohan goes to reach for him. The security worker is far too slow to stop him, only managing to catch the young man's after-image. Shin, on the other hand, doesn't even flinch. His usual calm demeanour has him stable, waiting.
"…Yes?" he asks.
The security worker is having none of it. "Let go! Let go right now!"
Shin remains imploring. "How can I help you?"
But Gohan's voice isn't working. He can only stare, barely looking up from the floor as to protect his identity. Why can't he do this? This is a perfect opportunity! Why can't he save himself?! Shin knows Gohan Son!
Because you're not Gohan Son anymore, says that cruel voice in his head, you're a drunk.
"Release him at ONCE!"
He won't even recognize you, and if he does, all you're doing is tarnishing the memory of Gohan Son, a dead boy from Earth.
"Are you alright?"
Gohan Son is dead, remember that. You are not him!
"I…I…"
He is a kai and you are a God of Revelation –he will not help you now. If you reveal yourself, the kais will just be done with you, like they have with every God of Revelation.
"Let go!"
You can't go back. You'll never be who you were. Gohan is DEAD. Even if you are not Mori, you are NOT him.
"Let GO!"
"I…"
Let go!
And so, Gohan does.
"I… I'm…"
Shin doesn't move away. In fact, he leans closer and tries to peer under the hood. "Young man, are you-"
Gohan doesn't let him finish. He just runs, flying through the white, the holy and the sacred, only to emerge at yet another watering hole. All night, the hood stays on, tied and tight, as he sips at one sad glass of spirit. Immediate regret takes him, but he does little to change anything.
"Why didn't I just talk to him?" Gohan asks himself over and over again
"Because you know better now," that voice, his voice, replies back.
He breathes, haggard. "I could have gone home… I could have seen my family –my friends. I… Why didn't I just speak to him?"
"They are not your family now. You are beyond that."
"Beyond… family?" Gohan snorts, pressing his head back further into the pillow.
"Yes."
The inn room is spinning, and not because he's drunk because he's not drank in days now. The taste of it makes him want to be sick, makes him dizzy with anxiety because Gohan now knows that's what is encouraging the dreams, these horrible memories. He doesn't want to see any more. He… just… just wants separation from it all –he doesn't want to face it.
Yet here he is, talking to himself, probably delirious, maybe crazy. He's so tired. God, is he tired.
"What about Rixas? He's family."
"He does not really care about you, like he never cared about me in the end. He and Quell are of the same cloth. Discard them."
"…Did he kill you? Is that why you hate Quell?"
"That… is a question you should ask yourself as we are one in the same."
"No, we're not," Gohan replies to the ceiling's greying paint. "I may not be me but I'm certainly not you. I just… I just don't know what I'm dealing with; I don't understand the mess you've left me!"
"The truth will out."
"Then why can't you just tell me now?"
"Simply, because I am not real," the voice drawls within his mind, "you know as much."
Gohan folds in half, bringing his knees high as he balls himself up as small as possible. "I don't know what to do anymore. I… I…"
"Drink the elixir and embrace your fate. Stop hiding behind this mortal shell and finish the work I started; accept my identity and build something great."
"But…" He swallows, remembering Mori's cool interactions with Famis, remembering how hurt Roarg had looked when recollecting Mori, how Quell and he had obviously shared some heated history. "I… I'm out of my depth. I'm not you."
"Not yet."
"I don't think you were a good person."
"We're all serving something, Gohan."
"And Quell… he… does he want me dea-"
And that's when Gohan realises that this had been yet another dream, because he wakes violently, breathing manic as he feels a shock of ice water splash over him. He shoots upwards, sodden, frozen, and sitting in a damp inn bed.
"Get up."
He swivels, eyes wide. All his dreams and nightmares have merged together because the worst of it now stands before him.
"Get up," repeats Quell, empty glass in hand.
The man doesn't look angry per say, just his usual rigid self. The cool glow of his golden gaze fixates directly upon Gohan, as if daring him to disobey. Gohan does in fact stand, not because of the demand, but because the idea of Quell lording over him doesn't sit well with him, and so he rises gingerly, almost like a deer in the headlights.
"Have you had an enjoyable few weeks?" Quells asks with a dangerous lightness. "You do not look as relaxed as imagined. Actually, you look positively awful. Though, I suppose I should take my graces where I can as you do appear to be sober at least. Rixas had warned otherwise." He wastes no time in yanking at Gohan's chin. They're nearly the same in height so it is especially patronizing when the god pulls him forward for closer inspection. "Have you even slept on your travels? I have seen corpses looking sprightlier."
Gohan snatches himself free and presses against the wall, hoping for it to just allow him to pass through.
"Paranoid, I see," Quell continues, "Do you think I am here to harm you?"
"…What's that?" Gohan finally gets out when he notices the man's hand is not empty, "Is that the elixir?"
Quell's lips pull together and Gohan watches as the god surveys their surroundings, clearly acknowledging Gohan's possible escape routes. There's a door (which Quell now blocks) and a window to their right. Unless Gohan blows the wall through, there's little options.
"Yes, it is."
Gohan's heart thumps in its cage. "I'm not taking it."
"Mori," Quell groans, "it is time to stop being difficult about all of this. You are clearly acting unreasonable, all likely due to this madness you've cast yourself in. I could have administered the elixir as you slumbered but I chose not to. Does this mean nothing to you?"
Yes, no… yes, maybe, no. Gohan doesn't know, but he doesn't drop his guard.
"Back off," he warns as the god advances. "Leave me alone. I'm done with you, with all of this… this god stuff!"
"Tch, look at you. At this rate, you'll be dead before the week is up."
"Good –fine! That's fine!"
"Oh, because you want to go to Otherworld with your beloved mortal family? Get real, Mori, as if the kais would ever even allow that. They'd keep you separated, possibly even study you, use you, disjoint your soul. Is this what you want for yourself?"
"Shut up!" Gohan shouts, "Stop trying to manipulate me!"
"You stubborn retard!" Quell snaps back, equally as loud, "You are killing yourself out of spite, that or out of sheer stupidity and for what?!"
"Freedom," Gohan instantly retorts.
Quell looks like he's just seen something not quite there. He balks, pressing his fingers to his eyes and groaning. Gohan sees this as his chance to maneuverer closer to the window. Quell, meanwhile, composes himself momentarily. He churns the decanter around in his palm, over and over, as if thinking on how to proceed, but he doesn't get a chance to. Gohan darts out of the window gracelessly, feet first, before plummeting several feet to the ground and taking off.
This particular inn sits in a bed of sand, along the strip of a famous tourist spot in the sandy plains of Planet Qui. For miles and miles, the desert stretches out with no life to be seen except for the sad spectacle of an odd cactus. Gohan passes several of these, zooming past at incredible speed. The one thing he has never been is slow; even Rixas struggles to keep up in their sessions. Impressively, he weaves under rocks, around hills and through the never-ending ocean of sand. Gohan flies for so long that the planet's star has now started to rise, bringing impossible waves of white heat.
But eventually, it soon becomes too much and Gohan has to stop. He barrels into the sand, coughing and spluttering, trying to catch his breath with little luck. What he would do for a drink of water…
The sweltering pressure of the star is joined by a brother only moments later. With double the stars comes double the heat, and Gohan is not coping well whatsoever. Never before has he hated the heat like this, hated the weather with such ferocity.
"Damn it!" he curses, panting. "Damn it, damn it, damn it!"
He hits the sand, shouting a flurry of exotic swear words he knows as the sweat pours. If the temperature doesn't kill him, the anger might.
"Contain yourself."
Gohan doesn't even bother turning around. He just lowers his head into his hands and screams. What the hell kind of monster is this guy? Why can't he just leave him alone?!
"Get up," Quell next orders, "I do not want to play these games anymore."
"Fuck you!" Gohan finally seethes, spinning in the sand and dirt. "I'm done with this –ALL OF THIS!" Quell tilts his head, his hair (which now sits atop his head in a messy knot) dangles liberally, fluttering casually in the thin breeze. The action annoys Gohan further; makes him furious, makes him scream.
With that scream, Gohan charges forward, carried by the force of energy and buries a fist into the gut of the bastard. It nestles deep, burning with a heat rivalled only by the two stars watching above. Quell immediately cries out, and then backhands Gohan hard. The latter courses backwards, hitting rock after rock, stopping only when coming into contact with a particularly large hill. A catalytic explosion of sand follows. They gush furiously, licking at Gohan before forming into several rope tornados of which clash and roar for dominance.
The young man spits a wad of blood out, along with a tooth. But before he can compose himself, Quell is upon him, quick. Gohan jumps up and meets him in the air, aiming another fist, only to fail and be restrained by both hands.
"Stop this!" Quell exclaims.
Instead, Gohan brings down his head, smashing it against Quell's. It hurts like hell and Gohan would have assumed that it'd done him more damage than Quell if he hadn't been released. For a brief moment, he can't actually see. His vision is white. And whilst he can sense the vehemence of Quell's ki, he can't pinpoint his exact location, so he aims a well-estimated punch. He misses the first but succeeds with the second, sending the bastard down to the ground with such savagery, that the ground thunders beneath them.
He pants as the world of colour returns to him, yet there's little time to rest. Another scream leaves him and he sets off ki blast after blast towards the god. They progress towards him, growing with every second as sister balls of energy follow. Gohan cries and cries as the light balloons, forming a crater to where he'd just forced Quell. The energy continues to grow, thinning the line of blue sky between the ground and the stars. It's hot, so hot now, that Gohan is soaked in his own sweat. He's sickly with dehydration, but the ki is never ending. Never before has Gohan been able to draw so much of it from out of himself.
With one last scream, Gohan sends his last sphere of light. It glows gold and is too bright to look at, casting rays of colour in sporadic directions messily as it flies. When it hits, the sound is deafening. It booms around as the explosion rips through the plains, tearing new strips and sending sand spinning through the air. It spins, feral, much like a carousel before finally bowing and collapsing down onto the newly birthed crater.
Gohan can only watch, panting, sweating as the dust clouds start to clear. Shades of yellow and brown fade, and where Gohan had hoped to see the incapacitated form of Quell, he finds himself unsurprised to see otherwise. Quell is there, however, looking rather ragged. His once beautifully tailored robes are anything but. They hang off of him in rags, draping over dirtied and scuffed skin –but that is it, for there is not a single wound. He doesn't look too happy though. His hair flies free now, knotting and tangling awkwardly from the sand.
That's the worst Gohan has done… he's only managed to give the guy a bad hair day.
"You want this, Mori?" Quell hollers up to him, "then so be it! Prepare yourself!"
Gohan doesn't need to be told twice. Even as exhaustion threatens to take him, he raises his fists and steadies his form. He barely registers Quell's first swing, only dodging out of instinct. The next one clips him but he manages to swerve around the following. One after the other, punches fly at him, giving Gohan absolutely no chance to retaliate. Even Rixas leaves room to breathe but Quell is a machine. The style is so surprisingly aggressive; so punch-heavy, that Gohan's forced to revaluate on how to get an attack in. He pulls back, lowering and then skidding along the sand.
Quell lands in front of him, already ready to strike and so Gohan blasts him with a clean surge of ki. The lack of effect is embarrassing. Quell isn't so much as singed.
"Weak," he comments, and then shows Gohan what a real ki blast should look like.
The energy spirals into a perfect ivory sphere before shooting out. It's only small but the deadly intent can be sensed from it, potent in its unassuming wrath. Gohan stands not a chance. Even when he tries to avoid it, the blast meets its target and bursts into a firework of shining hot, white embers. It sears him, burning miniscule holes into his flesh and making him feel like he's being burnt from the core of his bones.
When he screams, Quell offers another of these blasts, and then another and another. Each torments him more than the last, having him writhe and fit from the scrutiny. And that's when Quell goes for the finisher. The god's arm pulls back to deliver that last brutal punch, but Gohan, despite his many injuries, refuses to be done in like this. It's in this final moment of desperation that Gohan does something he would have never ever done before as a respectable fighter. With two hands, he grabs Quell's free-flowing blonde locks and pulls down hard as his knee lifts. And so, there's a nauseating crack as Quell's face (and presumably his nose) meet the hard muscle of Gohan's thigh.
Quell yells, falling back to cover his nose. Gohan stumbles and falls against the sand, still shaking from the onslaught. But something tells him that it's not over.
And it's not. Quell's head flies up, and instead of rage, Gohan's greeted with the most manic grin he's ever seen in his life. Blood coats his teeth and his eyes are wide, unblinking as white-blonde hair snakes around his face. A glob of blood is spat.
"Not bad," he praises. A shiver shoots down Gohan's spine. "I think I understand Rixas' point a little better now. To draw my blood, however… crudely done, is not an easy feat. But… alas, Mori, I have no time for games today."
His hand slowly uncurls to reveal the elixir.
"N-No!" Gohan garbles, "I—I won't do it… I don't care about your collecti-"
Quell clicks his tongue before spitting another mouthful of blood out. "Mori…You think this is solely for the sake of the collective?" His neck cranes and an emotion Gohan can't recognize takes him fleetingly. "Must I spell it out for you?"
Instead, Gohan's gifted with a ruthless blow across the temple. Inside his skull, his brain wobbles and everything turns fuzzy. Static reverberates in his head as he crumbles to his knees, tears birthing as he contains a raw sob.
The brutality of the swing has him unable to see straight –to see anything, to hear properly. Nothing; Gohan is blinded and deafened, which doesn't help when a fresh flurry of punches follow.
You have my power –use it, that voice says.
Gohan can't respond. He takes attack after attack without being able to so much as lift an arm in defence.
Are you going to let Quell kill you?
He tries to speak and a fountain of blood pours free.
Quell will bury you here! He will MAKE YOU A MERE MEMORY!
A blast of energy manages to shoot from Gohan's form, and he feels Quell's form bounce back, but before Gohan moves in for the roundhouse kick, an image flashes before him.
"Do not cry," whispers a voice from the image in his head; this new memory, this poorly, poorly timed memory.
"But it hurts," replies a child's voice –his voice?
"I see. Come here."
The image flashes several times until it just clicks into place, much like how an old film reel would find confidence in its story. With a clearer flow of things, Gohan can finally make sense of what he's seeing. It's Quell, sitting remarkably close, so close that Gohan could very well be sitting on his lap. He's looking down at Gohan with a strange range of emotions; ones that Gohan's never seen before from him and cannot place whatsoever. When his hand brushes through Gohan's long blonde hair does he realise that he is, in fact, sitting on the man's lap.
"Can I sleep here –until my toothache goes away?"
Fingers comb through his hair reassuringly, softly, so gently that Gohan feels like he might fall asleep from it should it continue. There's a laugh. "You want to sleep at my desk?"
"Just for a while…"
Quell hums but never once stops brushing his fingers through the locks. "Would it really ease your toothac-"
Another punch brings him back to reality, to now, to where Quell is beating the living hell out of him. Something in his chest gurgles when Quell lands his latest hit, and then he's out again.
"You're totally spoiling him," Rixas's voice welcomes; its tone disapproving. "Look at his face. He's smirking –oh man, you're gonna make a total brat outta' him."
"Don't be so wet; Rixas," Quell scolds lightly, "Jealousy is ugly on you."
"Jealousy?!"
Gohan can't see anything this time and that's because he assumes his eyes must be closed in the memory, but he feels the warmth of arms around him –of being carried.
Quell's voice vibrates against his side. "Perhaps I would have become fond of you if you were not such a repulsively and cheeky brat."
"Aghh, you carry him around like a little emperor! All the house workers think you've gone mad!"
"Oh hush, I do not care for the opinions the lesser. They-"
Gohan awakes when a hand cranes him up into the sky. His vision has now completely returned and he's somewhat surprised to see Quell looking a bit bloodier than before. Had he been fighting all this time? What's happening to him? Where are these memories coming from?
"Mori, I have brought you a gift from Planet Ytelli. Come, come… Look! What do you think?"
"Uwah, wow, big brother. It is am-"
Another punch wracks him.
"Come, little brother, I wish to take you on an excursion to the-"
Another punch.
"Mori! Get down out of that tree this instance! Mori! MORI!"
And in them… Quell… he… he…
Gohan coughs, choking on his thoughts. The Quell right now looks completely different; all sharp edges and aloof anger. When Gohan's hand climbs up to reach and remove Quell's, the latter can only watch.
"I… I don't get it anymore," Gohan then caws, "do you hate me or not?!"
The hand drops him. "… Hate you?"
Sand climbs around them as Quell leans over. Whatever happens next is lost on Gohan as he's sucked into yet another memory. This one is of Quell teaching him to read, another follows; a similar one to where Quell is carrying him around the estate. The next has Quell and Gohan walking through forests of the Realm of the Almighty, playful and light. More follow, one after the other after the other, hitting Gohan like an overwhelming storm.
He wants to scream, wants to make them stop, wants to pause everything because it's like swallowing an entire life's worth of memories at once. The memories range from when Gohan had been young all the way into his late teens as Mori, as the little brother of the man he's fighting now; his brother.
"Stop it!" Gohan begs, yanking at his hair. "Please!"
But there's one more thing he needs to see.
'Quell's watching from the Winter Pavilion. It's only time.'
Gohan watches as Mori finishes penning the note, his hand coming to a halt over the drying ink. He looks at the writing for a long time, as if contemplating something. Gohan feels the bubble of uncertainty reveal itself. In the background, Gohan spots the earlier piles of research which covers the saiyans, body and ki. The documents look especially worn, far more so than Gohan has seen in any other memory.
"The note?" suddenly comes a voice from the computer.
Mori doesn't even turn to face the screen. "It's done. I will make sure to leave it in an obvious place, that way even an idiot like Myra will be able to find it."
He places the note in the bookshelf nearer the front, just so it pokes out a little, exactly where Gohan remembers finding it years ago. Perhaps Myra hadn't stumbled upon it after all –why had that been Mori's intentions? Gohan doesn't get it…
But he's about to.
"Excellent," replies the voice. It's unfamiliar to Gohan and so he desperately wants Mori to turn his attention to the screen. Of course, the god doesn't. Instead, he moves to retrieve a selection of well-read books from beside his bed. "When the note is found, I'll try and use my influence to have the estate investigated."
Mori moves to strew books across his desk. "And Quell?"
"Perfectly framed. The kais will have him detained before you return."
"Good," Mori hisses, "perhaps they'll even execute him for it."
Gohan can't focus. What's going on? Did Mori write the note to frame Quell –what, what?! Desperately, he tries to move Mori's arms and legs but they won't cooperate. He yearns to take control, to turn to the screen, to talk to Mori –to do anything!
"Won't that harm the collective?"
"With the power of a saiyan body, combined with that of a god, I will become indestructible. I won't need the power of the collective. When I return, together we shall reach our goal."
"Then I'll be waiting," replies the voice, "be sure to reach out to me upon your homecoming."
"Of course. According to my research, once the saiyan body has begun nearing adulthood, then my soul's will shall take action and bring it back to the realm automatically. Hopefully by then, Quell will have been fully dealt with."
"And Rixas?"
"Tch, and Rixas will be mollified with my return. Do not worry about him. He's simple. He'd just be happy to have at least one brother back. If not… well, then we will cross that bridge when we come to it."
"So be it," the voice says, "then I wish you luck on your venture, friend. I shall see you on the other side."
Mori barks a cruel sort of laugh as he opens a desk drawer. A tiny orange pill is revealed. "That you shall. Be on your guard until then."
"You too, however you can be. Here is hoping that you don't reincarnate as a woman… or a degenerate." A chuckle follows. "Farewell."
Mori snorts, amused. "Farewell."
Absently, through the screaming in his own head, Gohan hears the computer click into sleep mode. His chest, or rather, Mori's chest, doesn't even flicker in concern now. It only burns with hatred, with disgust –with the desperate hunger for revenge.
He sits at his computer and then swallows the pill dry.
"Let's see you control me now, brother."
And then, the lull of the heaviest possible sleep takes him.
From that moment on, Mori disappears… for seventeen Earth years, at least.
Gohan awakens to a sight most unexpected. A sea of blonde hair blinds him, curtaining his view as he feels the light pressures of cold finger tips along his chest.
"Wh-What happ-?"
"Be quiet," a voice orders, one that is unmistakably Quell's.
And that's when it all hits him again, when he's reminded of what he's just seen. He moves to sit up before being pushed back down to the carpet with brutal force.
Wait… carpet? Gohan doesn't move to get up again, instead choosing to look around. They're no longer in the desert. This place, for one, is not hot enough thanks to the glorious air conditioner sitting in the corner of the room. It breathes an icy wind at them over the simplicities of typical hotel furniture.
Gohan tries to move again, only to be pushed back down once more so Quell can continuing doing whatever he's doing. Suddenly, Gohan becomes very aware of the situation –he twists his head to look for the sign of an empty decanter -Quell must have force-fed him the elixir by now!
But no such thing is found.
"I have not yet given it to you," Quell says, still pressing into Gohan's chest. It stings, burning with that familiar heat of medicine. "I am only applying the healing salve. The elixir remains on the table beside you."
Heart in his throat, Gohan turns to see that Quell is telling the truth. The golden syrup stares back, menacing. When a thick lump of the serum is rubbed into the raw wound of where those white ki blasts had struck, Gohan groans, writhing and pulling to one side.
"Yes, I do imagine that would hurt," Quell says, "and… this might too."
Gohan cries out again, but Quell doesn't stop. He continues applying the medicine despite his own, admittedly less serious, injuries remaining unhealed. He tiredly applies dollop after dollop as Gohan can only watch, almost in a stupor, lost for words. What can he even say? What can he say to the person who he'd once tried to be rid of? To the person he'd tried to kill?
It hurts as Quell sees to the wounds, and not necessarily because of the physical pain. Guilt builds within, mounting with each passing second as Quell quietly continues, saying nothing, looking as tired as Gohan feels. Why is he helping? Why does he keep helping?!
He shuffles back, startling the god. Within seconds, Gohan's up and pressed firmly against the concrete of a wall.
Quell's scowl follows. "Mori, what do you think you are doing? I need to apply more—wait, are you… are you crying?"
Oh god. Gohan brings his fingers up to his cheeks. He is. Violently, he swipes them away, just for them to be replaced as an onslaught of more follow.
Quell appears uncomfortable, but he doesn't move away. "All this because of the elix-"
"I am so confused!" Gohan offloads, voice wet. "I… I –I don't get any of it. I… why would he do that –why would I do that?"
"What…?"
The young man rakes his fingers along his cheeks. "What kind of monster was I? You… you just care about him, don't you? You're his brother, you –you just didn't want him to end up like Famis, to die. Why couldn't he see that –why couldn't I see that? I…Quell…" His voice breaks. "Quell… I remember…I-I-I!"
"For heaven's sake, breathe," Quell instructs, "I refuse to have you die in this squalor."
Gohan nods, swallowing air. Slowly, Quell discards the remnants of the Amber Salve onto the bed beside him. He looks to be assessing the situation, face probably not as blank as he'd like it to be. He looks anxious –which is appropriate considering the circumstances.
Whilst Gohan is still without many of the memories he'd lost, he's now experienced enough to know what Quell had meant to Mori in the past. This person… this is the person who had been the parental figure, Mori's answer to Gohan's dad, Mori's person who was supposed to protect him. And in the end, what did Mori plan on doing? Something so foul that Gohan feels sick at the idea of it, feels the need to repent, to grovel, to cry and beg for forgiveness. Gohan could never imagine doing anything of the sort to his own father, the man who loves him most. Yet… Mori, the evil, evil, creature that he had been, had really planned on…
God. God, he feels sick thinking about it.
For the first time in a long time, Gohan yearns for his dad. He just wants him to hug him, have him pat his head like he used to, have him say that it's going to be okay even when it isn't; what he'd do to have that. Instead, he's left with Mori's brother, the one who rightly should hate him above anyone else.
"Mori, what sort of memory could have upset you so? What did you do?"
A hiccough leaves Gohan when he tries to speak, so he takes a moment to calm himself, to breathe, to really savour what a malevolent piece of shit Mori had been.
"Mori wasn't murdered," he eventually gets out.
"Of course not, otherwise you would not be here. Your attacker had destroyed your other vessel and-"
"No, please… no, listen. I wasn't… Mori wasn't attacked. He was never attacked. I remembered the night he died, he… he…" Gohan stares at Quell, who now looks transfixed, albeit still rather concerned. "Quell, I'm… so sorry. Mori did it to himself. He planned it; he'd wanted to kill him-"
"Preposterous," Quell huffs, "you're remembering wrong. Why on earth would you want to do such a thing?"
"I'm telling you! Please, hear me! He did it for power –to be able to achieve more power through the strength of saiyan genetics. Y-You said it: Mori was always researching about the saiyans, and this is why! He'd been plotting this for years, ever since Famis' death!"
"For… power?"
"Yes," Gohan breathes, exhausted. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Quell, I—I… he was a monster! He was evil! A bastard! A… a-!"
"Breathe, damn it!"
Gohan does, and when the air goes to leave him, a sob follows. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Quell."
"What on… What…" Quell's voice dies, only managing silence as Gohan tries to contain his grief, his absolute guilt. Finally, when he does speak, it's much softer than Gohan's yet heard it. "Brother, tell me what happened?"
The young man doesn't know where to start. He's been bottling up all his thoughts for so long now that telling anyone, never mind Quell, just feels so wrong. Suddenly, a spot of warmth runs up his arm and he spots Quell pressing his hand upon him.
"Mori," he starts, slow, "what did you do?"
Gohan stares at him, eyes wide and watery. "I really messed up."
"Did you really kill yourself?"
"Yes," he whispers hoarsely, as if scared for anyone else hear, "everything I said… it's true."
"I… see." The god pulls his hand back. Gohan watches it go. "You had your soul reincarnated into this body for power? To become stronger? To be able to physically match Rixas and I? That… was the reason?"
"Yes."
"But it went wrong, clearly. You could not remember anything upon your return."
Gohan nods, eyes pressing together. "I think… something went wrong in the calculations. I-I don't know."
Quell pauses, and he leans back, watching Gohan with a level of scrutiny seen many times before. And then, so fast that Gohan could not even see the movement, a hand swings and slaps him hard across the face. His head turns violently from the assault, but he feels little pain from it, only shock.
"You selfish brat," Quell finally snarls, "How dare you! How dare you put us through that?!"
Gohan nods, lowering his head back into his hands. "I know."
"We thought you dead, Mori! I thought you dead! I mourned you!"
"I-I'm sorry."
"For so long, I thought the Zealites had gotten you too –I'd blamed myself for years! I'd blamed Rixas! I'd blamed the kais, the other gods –everyone! Mori, how –how…ARGH!" Quell yells, presumably into his own hands because the noise sounds muffled. "You stupid boy! You selfish, sel-"
"That's not just it."
The god leans forward, almost maniacal. "What else?"
Gohan swallows. "I remembered… a lot, so much about everything, and… I used to think that you hated me and I… I thought, maybe, you've been wanting to hurt me, kill me possibly. But I remembered that you've always been there… haven't you, Quell? You… I think you raised me."
"You thought what?"
"I'm such a mess," Gohan says by way of apology, throat still thick, "I… you just scared me so much when I first came to the estate and that festered into something ugly. And then, Mori's memories slowly started to return and this strange narrative started coming together, and so I started believing that you were just trying to make my life hell and –and-"
"Damn it, Mori."
"And I started thinking that you were the bad guy," he finishes, "especially from some of Mori's later memories of you…"
Quell's anger then subdues and he has the decency to look somewhat ashamed. "We… we had several words towards the end."
"He hated you… I hated you."
The shame melts into something worse; an unabashed sadness. "I don't understand."
"After Famis' death, you restricted my movement. For years, the resentment festered into something… really ugly and he… I tried to do something so wholly evil. Quell, what you did wasn't great but-"
"I was protecting you!" he snaps, the argument still clearly raw. "Famis' killers could've been out there –they still could be. I'm working constantly to try and bring down the Zealites! I will have them answer for what they did. I refuse to have the collective harmed. I refuse to let them hurt you or Rixas!"
"Quell…"
"Don't have me spell it out for you, Mori, it's much too cruel to have me sacrifice my pride like that." The man scrapes a handful of blonde knots from out of his face. "From the moment of Famis' death, I… I have relived that nightmare over and over. I cannot bare to think of doing this with Rixas, or with you."
I know that…
Gohan nods, chest tight.
I know that as Gohan now, but… Mori had not known, nor would he have cared.
"I think you just took it too far," Gohan finally replies, "The realm became a prison."
"Do you not think I know that now?" Quell hisses, "That is why… I listened to that retched Doctor Jivel. He told me to give you time and space, which I did, but still, you only came to resent me more. Even when I told you not to leave the realm this time, you did and I chose to look the other way if just to give you the space I had restricted you from in the first place. I had turned a blind eye to yours and Rixas shenanigans, to your training, to the excessive drinking, to many a thing I would pulled you on once upon a time ago."
"You threatened to kill my family on Earth!"
"You were being unreasonable!"
"Wh-What? I… Quell… They're my family!"
"I'm your family!"
Yet, what kind of family are they? Family that threaten to hurt and kill? No, Mori hadn't ever threatened such a thing. He'd jumped the gun and gone straight for Quell's jugular. Gohan remembers the memory, remembers the vicious tones coming out of his own mouth.
"Good," Mori had hissed, "perhaps they'll even execute him for it."
The guilt returns, overpowering the anger and nauseating Gohan to the point he believes he might just be sick then and there.
"What is it? Do you have heat stroke?"
"No…" Gohan's throat threatens to close up once again. "There's something else I need to tell you."
Quell sighs and drags himself up, stretching his legs. Gohan can only watch as the tatters of material trail up and down his form, blood splatters occasionally appearing behind the creases. If he was a betting man, Gohan would bet that that's not Quell's, especially considering that Gohan feels like he's just been mowed down by the universe's biggest bulldozer.
When Gohan tries to stand, he slips and ends up crashing against the cardboard-comfort of the cheap inn bed.
"Out with it, brother," Quell demands, "let me hear the worst of it so we can go home."
Gohan fast feels himself growing emotional again. "Quell, you need to know, Mori was a monster. I was a mons-"
"I don't care for self-pity. Say what you need to say."
"R-Right." Gohan takes a final breath, shaky. "Before I took my life, I'd spoken to someone on the computer after… about you… and about a note I'd written about you."
Quell remains silent, eyes hard.
"I wrote that you'd been watching me; something ominous and not right, something that would lead suspicion back to you for when they found the body." He grits his teeth. "Quell, I tried to frame you for my death. I wanted the kais to come and…"
"Say it."
"I wanted you dead," he finishes.
Gohan thinks of his dad back on Earth, thinks of his mother and of Goten. It's the first time in such a long time that he's thought about them like this, mourned them in this way, felt their familial connections interwoven with Mori's own. It hurts. He would never lay a hand against Goten, and now, the idea of doing such a thing to Rixas and, yes, even Quell now makes his stomach churn with disgust.
A hot tear streaks down his face.
Silence carries between them, and all Gohan can do is keep his head lowered.
Mori had been a beast. I wish that I'd never been rebor—
"Once again, you are crying," Quell says, voice surprisingly level.
"Because I'm sorry," he mumbles, "I'm so, so sorry, Quell. I… I really am."
"But you say that you are this Gohan so why should you be sorry?" he challenges, "Gohan the mortal had not wanted my head, only my brother, the sweet boy I had watched from a baby, only he had wanted me dead."
Gohan sees those memories replay again, over and over, as if his mind is also against him.
"My brother killed himself with the aim of having me suffer at the hands of our truest enemies."
"Yes."
"He wanted to usurp me."
"I… think so."
"So he plotted against me."
"Yes."
"Because he hated me."
"N-Not always, but yes."
"And still hates me?"
Gohan's mouth sticks together as if melded with glue. His head pivots to where he sees Quell standing before the foot for the bed, golden gaze expectant. In turn, Gohan shakes his head but still manages to keep it low. Another bout of quiet follows, with the only break of it being Gohan's occasional stutters of breath.
It draws on for so long that, at one point, he actually thinks that Quell has up and left. But no, after a time, he does speak.
"This is… difficult to process."
"I'm sor-"
"I know that, but apologies do not usually hold weight with me." The young man nods. He gets it. Gohan doesn't know if he'd have it in him to forgive him either. Killing family is abhorrent; it's even a line crossed for someone as cool-operating as Quell.
A hand upturns Gohan's chin.
"I will never call you by your mortal name," Quell then says, face impassive, "and I expect loyalty to our cause, no more of this reckless partying and no more substance abuse. When I give you advice, I expect you to at least consider it, and preferably follow it. If I-"
"What? What are you talking about?" Gohan exclaims, "I tried to k-"
"Be quiet." The hand drops, and so does that frosty facade. "Mori, you're my brother. I cannot harbour hate against you, even if you once wished me dead. Consider this over. You are forgiven."
It's like being dunked into icy waters.
"What?"
"Let us return to the estate," Quell continues, dragging him up. "I shall invite Doctor Jivel immediately to look over your wounds. Whilst you have speed, I do not commend your ability to take a hit. Perhaps that is due to Rixas not being able to formulate a decent ki blast. No matter. I'll demonstrate to you how to perform an ideal atta-"
"Wh-What?"
Quell considers him. "Whilst not perfect, I thought you held yourself against me quite well earlier in the desert. With some adequate training I think we'll be able to shape you up quite nicely. We'll craft a routine, I'll think of what energy manifestation techniques you could-"
"No!"
"No? But I had thought you'd wanted-"
"No, no, no, stop. Put me down!"
Quell leans him against the table. "What is it now? Can it not wait until we're back?"
"I don't understand," Gohan says, "I'm forgiven… just like that?"
Frustration passes over Quell's features. "Yes, just like that. Now, let's go before you bleed out and I end up having to carry you like a damsel in distress. I'm sure neither of us would enjoy that."
"Q-Quell…"
"Don't you dare cry. I do not do criers; you should know this above all. I do not want tears."
Gohan nods, sniffing, and praying that his eyes would dry up already. After everything, this man… his brother, is willing to be just that.
And so, Gohan must step up too.
Not just for Quell, but for all the others Mori has wronged too.
For Famis; the brother who had hated Mori and had seen the evil within.
For Roarg; someone still hurting.
For Rixas; inevitably the person who would fall victim to Mori next…
Also, for Gohan; the remnant of the monster… who is now just the young saiyan casualty that wants to make it right.
And he really does want to make it right, but not only that, he also wants to move on, to live and be a part of something, be with a family, his family. Living as the ghost of Mori's –no, his- mistakes is not living at all.
Gohan is ready to take that step forward, to stop haunting the past, and to embrace the future.
From the other side of the table, he spots it. The sheen of gold greets him with its knowing sparkle. Quell can only watch as Gohan pulls himself free, sweeps the elixir from off the top, pops the cork and swallows the golden liquid in one swig.
It burns all the way down.
To new beginnings.
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As promised, here you be. So, between the two parts, it climbed to around 20k. I'm EXHAUSTED. My real life has been horribly busy and I thought it would be excellent timing to try and push this out at the same time (apparently, I'm a total masochist). But yeah, man. It was a really, really difficult chapter to write (Part 1 and Part 2), but I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for the support for getting this far -we're finally at a huge turning point now. The next chapter will take us directly to Age 780. I am very pleeeeased.
As usual, thanks to Kags for editing. I can't function alone. Oh, also, thanks to my cat, Pigeon, for allowing me to finish writing this chapter without sitting on the keyboard and deleting the text as she normally enjoys doing. And THANKS for the reviews! I felt cheeky asking last chapter but I was really touched to see them come in so fast -people ARE reading, haha! I've had a few questions recently and so I thought I'd answer them here with a fun and totally unnecessary Q&A.
- Do Mori and Gohan look the same/ Does Gohan still look like Gohan?
Gohan still looks like Gohan, except a touch older. He is twenty here. In my mind, his hair needs a chop and he's looking a bit haggard. Like Mori, his eyes are golden in colour -really, him and Mori are more like twins. Not exactly identical but very similar. Gohan's more muscular, for example. Next chapter, there's a time skip so Gohan will be a tad different there.
- What age did all this kick off?
Age 777 :)
- How does the Realm of the Almighty exist within the DBZverse? Is it like Universe 13?
The realm is its own thing, its own reality away from the universe we know. I don't like Super so I won't be following it, but there are some characters I enjoy so I'm going to involve them. I've mentioned a couple already! They've been nicked from the dreadful Super world, bless em.
- Any other gods knocking about the Realm of the Almighty?
Yeah, but I won't have the time to explore them as much I'd like because: tangents.
- [Standard power level question]
Thanks, I hate it.
- Uh, I notice your ANs have typos p often. Artistic style?
Artistic Style. ...And they're the only thing KagariAsuha doesn't edit.
- How old are all the brothers? - No one at all
Wow, thanks for asking. I've had to do a lot of background writing on the characters, and so I've stored a lot of useless information on them that you will not care about. Ages (Earth years): Quell = 93mil, Famis = 80mil (at death), Rixas = 29mil, Mori = 11mil. If people ARE interested in useless trivia, I'm more than happy to go over a few bits in a future AN.
- Are Gohan and Mori merged? Are they one? Are they a lumpy GoMori-mess?
Accurate. I like to keep the lines blurred.
- What music do you write to?
Gohan = movie OSTs, Goku = musicals, Goten = the sound of crying children.
- So, hold up. Mori was a piece of absolute shit all along?
He sure was. I don't think it's a massive surprise to everyone, but I have really enjoyed the idea of Gohan dealing with something darker within himself. His character is pretty straight-laced except for these strange power bursts from nowhere. And I thought... well, what would happen if they weren't from nowhere? Mori is true-neutral to his core and sought after his own goal... which is to be revealed later gator. I've been framing Quell as the villain of this arc for so long and it was SO nice getting his true intentions out there. I do enjoy writing him. Like Rixas, he writes himself. You know who's hard to write? Goku.
Okay, I'm gonna' bounce. I think I'll have a wee rest until my next chapter. Not sure how long that means but it shouldn't be too long. I really hoped you enjoyed the reveals today and that the chapter was satisfying. Thanks so, so much for staying with me on this one~
