There had been a few moments in my life when I had felt triumph but they had been scarce and somewhat spaced out. I never had many personal enemies, I did not care much for defeat in the battleground as long as there were no great losses to my coven and I cared little for what happened while I was following orders. Nothing was ever personal, I was merely playing a role. None of it was for me as an individual, for my person, and I felt reasonably detached.
It was very much personal with Marina. It became personal. I shouldn't have allowed myself to grow attached, I had orders not to interfere with her life, but she captured me. Slowly, inconspicuously, she crept into my mind and my heart. Once I realised the depth of my feelings it was already too late, it was already too much. Her name echoed in my mind, her face plagued my vision and the more I wanted her the more I hated her for it.
It happened after the incident with the drunk man, I came to realise. The way she latched onto the opportunity to avenge herself, vicious and relentless. The way she kissed me after that, eager and abrasive. I had been falling for quite some time but that was when I finally hit the ground. I never had any appreciation for weakness and her display of strength, so unexpected and merciless, was the final blow to my aching soul.
She was a human with great potential, much like Jane and I used to be, but she was still human. I hated her for making me crave the touch and the approval of such a creature as I would do to an equal. She was not my equal, not yet. She was not worthy of me and still, I could barely focus on anything that didn't involve making her mine.
The filthy alluring inferior being.
She didn't even feel for me as I felt for her and it made me hate her even more. She dared to not reciprocate my feelings when she didn't even deserve my affection. I should see her as nothing more than a chore and a potential meal and yet there I was: touched, infatuated, lost. Tainted.
I didn't hate her, of course. I hated myself for feeling like this for her of all people. I had expected to find someone one day that would evoke such feelings in me but after all the people I have met and all the places I have been to I never expected them to be human. It was not surprising that it happened, it was only surprising that it was her.
When I finally managed to make her use her gift again right before my eyes I felt triumphant after quite some time. It was of my own interest, it was personal, and I succeeded. I won. I would be told to take her away with me, she would be turned, she would be part of the guard. She would be mine.
I longed to feel her lips on me again, I imagined what it would be like to feel them all over me and it was torture. The feeling of her hands in my hair and hearing her whimper that it was so soft lingered even after so many hours, echoing through the emptiness in my chest. I needed it again, I needed it forever. It took me more effort than I expected to leave her room without her. She was still cross with me for my outburst, I knew she would attempt to see her former lover even after my warnings but it hardly mattered, I could shred him to pieces and she wouldn't even remember it. She probably would not even remember him at all after her transformation.
After I left her house I informed the Masters of my achievement. I called Jane to check on her and to inform her that I would be returning and then I took great pleasure in calling Demetri from the airport.
"How much money did you lose?"
"You think I bet against you? I have always believed in you, I thought you knew that."
I heard Santiago laughing in the background.
"I got his money, I believed in you."
"Don't listen to him, he is jealous of our bond. How did you get her?"
"I dropped something important and she caught it."
He laughed loudly.
"Fuck, then I did it. It was my idea. Santiago, pay me back."
"You wish."
I felt euphoric, it was intoxicating. I completed the task given to me, I was headed home to see Jane, and I would go back to Brazil to collect Marina. I had her present with me as well as the small piece of her hair that I took as a token. I was a victor with the spoils of war but the most important of all was that I had found myself in her. She would forget her human life, she would let go of any resentment she felt towards me and I would be there when she woke up to make sure she could never forget me.
It occurred to me that being as old as I was I might have missed countless opportunities to feel so intensely as I did for her. I could have met perfectly good matches for myself throughout the years and never allowed them to connect with me, never reached out. Had I not been forced to spend my time with Marina I would have passed by her and overlooked her too. Had Fate not put her in my way through a series of coincidences I would have killed her without as much as a glance in her direction.
Then again if after centuries of existing and travelling it never happened before it could simply mean that there was no one else for me. It could mean she was the only one possible. It could just mean that after living for so long it was inevitable that it happened and she was just the lucky one, the one chosen by the Universe. Hand-picked and generously placed in my path to be noticed and claimed, and if so, how could I refuse such a gift?
I went to her country for another Marina and how very fitting that they shared a name. A very common name in the area and still it only added to the beauty of the serendipity of our narrative. I went there to collect a talented Marina and almost a year later I was finally doing just that. Talented, outstanding and finally mine. Making my way to Volterra I could feel myself aching with anticipation.
Even though I knew Aro would probably turn her himself I still hoped I would be allowed to taste her blood, even if just briefly. I daydreamed of it so many times, I began to crave it so badly... After succeeding in my task perhaps I would be allowed to indulge, if only so slightly.
It was nothing but a wishful thought, of course. I could not count on their generosity.
As I arrived at the castle I was received by Jane. She walked toward me while I approached her, meeting me halfway in the street by one of the alternative entrances of the building and held my hand when she reached me.
"It took you long enough" she teased with a hint of a smile on her face.
"Did you also bet against me?" I teased back and she scoffed.
"Don't be foolish."
I released her hand to take the journal Marina had given me from one of the pockets inside of my coat and handed it to her. She took it from me with a curious expression on her face and caressed the leather with the tips of her fingers. She then turned it over and opened it to look inside. As she saw the writing on the first page she raised her eyebrows at me.
"Is it true, then? You have fallen for the human?"
"I am quite taken with her, yes."
She handed back the journal.
" Unbelievable " she shook her head in disbelief and paused "decent craftsmanship" she added.
I chuckled and put the journal back in my pocket. Jane turned her back to me and made her way into the castle.
"I better like her," she warned me while walking away from me. "You can't have her if I don't like her."
"You will like her."
I followed her inside.
Aro had been very clear when he assigned Marina to me. I had to see her doing one more time exactly what I saw her doing in the street the night I first caught sight of her. Nothing else would do, she had to make an object float in the air. No matter what her ability turned out to be, that was the clearest demonstration of it we could hope to witness while she was still human. There was no speculation about it, it was a very obvious sign of supernatural power. Anything else would be too uncertain in comparison.
Then he was very clear about how I should proceed after watching her do it again. I had to go back to Volterra and let him see it for himself. He would discuss it with Caius and Marcus and depending on what I had to show them they would decide the best course of action. I would be one of the guards sent to collect her but they would choose the other ones after deliberation. If deemed unnecessary for me to be accompanied I would go alone.
I was very much hoping to go alone.
I followed it all. I went into the deliberation room and after being politely greeted by the masters and responding accordingly I allowed Master Aro to take my hand in his. I had a suspicion that he would not be too satisfied with everything he would see.
"You are correct in your assumption, my dear." He said as he let go of me.
"I apologise for my behaviour." I lowered my head, waiting for his words of disapproval.
He clicked his tongue.
"What has he done?" Caius asked from his chair.
Aro sighed heavily.
"He interfered a little too much." He appraised me for a moment. "But it is of little consequence now. She will leave that life behind."
Yes.
"She has used it one more time" he commented, "to subdue her assaulter, has she not?"
"Yes, Master. I believe she did."
"Remarkable."
"We shall discuss it," Caius announced, a clear cue for me to leave the room. I bowed respectfully and exited it.
I attempted to remain calm but I was uncharacteristically anxious. I waited at the end of the corridor to be summoned back into the room and never before that moment each second had seemed to pass so slowly. When I was finally called back inside I almost sprinted to the door.
"We have decided," Aro informed me with a cheerful smile.
"You will go, of course, and I believe Jane would appreciate going too." He paused as if to allow me to process the information but I knew he wanted to watch my reaction. I kept my face as neutral as possible, only bowing slightly to acknowledge him. He started to pace around the room, adding to the dramatic feel of his manner.
"Let us not send more people than necessary," he continued. "The girl was able to subdue a human bigger and stronger than her with the use of her ability but she was not able to do the same to you." He smirked knowingly and I knew he was referring to the moment I kissed her.
I ignored the tone of his remark to the best of my capability.
"Prepare to head back immediately," Caius ordered.
"Yes, Master."
"You are dismissed." He added.
There was no mention of allowing me to taste her blood and so I started to make my peace with it as I turned to leave the room and travel one more time. I assumed I should be the one to inform Jane of our imminent departure and reached for the doors to go to her room.
"Oh, and Alec" Aro called back as if he forgot to say something and just remembered what it was "You must not bite her but I suppose there is no great harm in a few scratches."
I frowned, not sure if he meant what I wished he did and not wanting to assume. He grinned.
"You may indulge, my dear boy."
I felt a grin of my own spreading across my face.
"Thank you, Master."
Now, that was more like it.
