Trustshipping (Ishizu x Kaiba)
It was scary how easy it was to hurt oneself. Ishizu couldn't help but think that as she drew the knife across her wrist again, barely wincing at the faint pain.
The small apartment she had rented in Domino City was bare and cold. She hadn't bothered to turn on the heat. After all, she only spent the nights here. The rest of her time was spent in the museum, trying to console herself that she could do this, that she could save her brother, despite the odds that stacked against her in her ever darkening visions.
But as soon as she was alone, in the dark, empty, unlived apartment, all she could see in her mind was blood: Marik's blood, when the pharaoh's secret was carved into his back, Rishid's blood, when she had walked in on him carving hieroglyphs into his face, her father's blood when the terrifying entity that possessed her brother carved the very skin from her father's back –
Why? Why only her? Everyone else had been hurt. Everyone else had lost blood. She sliced her wrist again – this time, it brought a small cry of pain. Alone. She was always alone. Mother had died before her eyes. Father had been brutally murdered by her own brother. Her brothers had left her behind. And why shouldn't they have? She didn't understand their pain. She never had. Her father had loved her, cared for her in a way that he had never cared for Rishid. And Marik...she had never understood his dreams, his longings. She had been content to live the life she was given.
Alone. Always alone. She would never understand them. She had it too easy. She had never felt their pain. Maybe if she could feel that pain, she would understand?
She put the knife to her wrist again.
The doorbell rang.
She was so surprised she cut a little deeper than she had meant to, crying out too loudly. Who was here? There shouldn't be anyone here.
The door opened – she had forgotten to lock it. Had they heard her cry?
She shoved the pocket knife into a desk drawer, out of sight as a figure appeared in the doorway. The silhouette was familiar: tall, with coat tails spread as though constantly blown by wind. Seto Kaiba? What was he doing here?
"What are you doing here?" she said.
His blue eyes were sharp, eying her.
"Well, there's some time before Battle City begins," he said tersely. "I thought you might know a little bit more than you're telling. I need to know more about the Ghouls."
"I've told you all that is important."
"Heh. You didn't deny that you know more than you've told."
Ishizu's mouth flattened into a thin line. Her wrist throbbed painfully: she needed to bandage that, before she bled to death. She had cut too deeply.
"And you just walked in?" Ishizu said calmly, trying to hide the pain from her voice.
Seto didn't answer, but Ishizu could see in his eyes that he had heard her cry out. It was shocking to realize that he was only sixteen. She was three years older than him, and he was so much taller than her. Her heart fluttered a bit, as visions of the past stirred in her. He looked exactly like Priest Set. Had they been close, in that life? She couldn't remember.
He stepped into the room. Ishizu stood up quickly.
"Please leave," she said. "You are breaking and entering, you know."
He shrugged, as if to say, 'I'm Seto Kaiba. I can do what I want.'
Ishizu's wrist throbbed again, and she felt the blood running down her palm. The pain must have flashed in her eyes for a moment, because Seto's eyes narrowed. He stepped closer.
"Something's going on," he said. "When we met at the museum, I could tell. You know so much more than you're willing to tell me. So tell me: why tell me anything at all?"
"Because you wouldn't believe me if I told you everything," she said, and she was surprised at the words. They seemed to come involuntarily.
"Oh, really?" Seto said, moving so that he was now standing in front of her, looming over her. "You don't think I'd believe this?"
He reached around her, took the hand she was hiding behind her back, and pulled it around so that the bloody wrist was revealed in the light. Ishizu snatched her hand away, feeling a throb of pain as she did so.
"I didn't pin you as the type to cut," Seto said.
"You don't know me, Seto Kaiba."
Kaiba laughed softly, but there was no mirth in it.
"And you don't know me. And yet, you act like you do."
She did know him. She had seen him over and over in her visions, past and future.
"Go away, Seto Kaiba. I have nothing more to tell you."
Seto's eyes narrowed.
"Why are you cutting yourself?"
"That's none of your business."
He stepped back away from her. He seemed like he wanted to say something, but he didn't know how.
"I've been there already, Ishizu," he said finally. "Cutting doesn't solve a thing. And it just makes writing a whole lot harder with all the bandages."
Ishizu had started to draw into herself, trying to block everything out. But Seto's words made her stop. He had cut himself? When? He held her eyes, blue to brown, past and future meeting.
"You're not the only one who's been to hell and back," he said.
She could see it: the Millennium Tauk sent her eyes back, where a small nine-year-old boy sat at a desk, drawing the knife across his wrist. That man wouldn't leave him alone. This was not the life he had wanted. This is not the life he wanted for his little brother. He didn't want to live – but he had to. He didn't want to think, but his mind kept going back, back to the terrible accident where their parents had died before his eyes, a time that thankfully his little brother did not remember. And to have traded that for this man, who would never think of him as any more than a mere tool, something to be molded and shaped into something as despicable as the man was.
Ishizu came back to the present. And still, his eyes were on hers, refusing to let go of her gaze.
"Why are you still here?" she said. Her tone make her sound like she was pleading with him, but she didn't care.
He paused, and then, she realized that he didn't know himself. But Ishizu thought she understood.
Only those that have been through hell understand it. And people like them, despite their efforts to remain apart, could not stay away from each other.
A/N: I LOVE this pairing! :D I actually wrote this before I wrote Tuftshipping, but I have to post them in order, right? Otherwise I'd be writing Blueshipping and Puzzleshipping right now. I really love Ishizu. I think she's a much deeper and emotional character than the manga or anime gets to delve into. Same for Seto, although he's still a prick no matter how I look at him. I still have to love him, though. X) Next is Tributeshipping (Mahad x Kisara). Yay, an ancient Egypt one! :)
