Chapter 20: A Flicker of Hope

Anna took a steadying breath and rested a hand Callen's arm. She took note of his clammy skin, his closed eyes, and his deliberate, rhythmic breaths and was sure that he was still fighting the nausea, and attempting to gain control of the pain.

Several minutes had passed when she noticed her patient swallow dryly. Keeping her hand on his arm, she bent down to his eye level. "Mr. Callen? Are you thirsty?" She asked softly.

Callen's only response was a quick glance up at the nurse, and then his eyes were, once again, closed.

"I'll go get you some ice chips." Anna stood up straight, looked across at Sam, and signaled for him to come take her place.

Sam quickly moved around to the side of the bed Callen was facing, stepping over the covers that had been tossed off the foot of the bed. He watched the nurse exit the room and looked down at the bed. It was apparent to him, as well, that his partner was doing his best to breathe through the pain and nausea.

The nurse had been gone no more than thirty seconds when Callen flinched, and then moaned softly.

Sam's brow creased with concern. He placed his hand on the smaller man's shoulder.

Callen's eyes opened, cut up to his partner, and then gazed straight ahead. He shook his head slowly several times, a look of bewilderment washing over his features. "I don't understand," He whispered.

Sam dropped down, sitting back on his heels, so that he was face-to-face with his Callen. "Understand what, G?"

"Don't know… what's going on." Callen's breathing was coming faster. He looked up at Sam with panicked, and now red-rimmed eyes. "What's happening to me, Sam?"

Before Sam had time to respond, Callen drew in a quick breath, and his body tensed all the way from his tightly shut eyes, down to his bare feet. A short, airy groan escaped just before the tension eased.

Now with even more worry in his eyes, Sam gripped Callen's shoulder a little more tightly. He was at a loss as to what to do or say to make things better, to make this all go away.

Anna entered the room carrying a Styrofoam cup. She immediately noted the change in her patient's breathing and the increased concern on Sam's face. She came around to where Sam was standing, looked up at the taller agent, down at the tight hold he had on his partner's shoulder, and then back up at Sam's eyes.

Sam let out a big breath through his nose, removed his hand from Callen's arm, and took a step to the side.

Anna pulled a small notepad from her scrub pocket. She quickly jotted down her one-word question that read "scared?" and held it up for Sam to see.

Sam looked down at Callen for a few moments, pressed his lips together tightly, and nodded his head once.

The nurse touched Sam's forearm, gave him an understanding look, and then turned her attention to her patient. "Mr. Callen, I have some ice chips. This may be a little tricky with you on your side. Do you want us to help you turn onto your back?"

With his eyes still closed, Callen weakly shook his head negatively.

"That's alright. We'll make it work." Anna scooped several tiny pieces of ice into a plastic spoon.

When Callen felt the edge of the spoon touch his mouth, he opened his eyes, and barely parted his dry lips.

Anna carefully deposited the ice chips, which immediately slid out the corner of his mouth and down onto the towel that had been placed beneath his head earlier. "Ooops. Let me try this again," The nurse said while scooping another spoonful.

G looked up at the nurse apologetically when the second attempt also resulted in the ice falling out of his mouth.

"Sorry," She said with a soft smile. "My fault." After handing Sam the cup, she placed her small fingers on Callen's jawline and gently guided his face upward just a few degrees. She held his head in place with one hand, and used the other to spoon out some ice chips from the cup the big agent was now holding.

This time, Callen was able to close his lips before the ice particles could escape. As the cold substance began to melt in his mouth, he closed his eyes in relief.

After the fifth spoonful, however, Callen suddenly gasped, and his eyes squeezed shut.

Anna quickly placed the plastic utensil in the cup, and switched her focus from hydration to comfort. She began gently rubbing small circles on the back of his head.

Ten seconds later, Callen finally let out the breath he had been holding.

"That's it," The nurse soothed. "Just breathe through it."

Opening his unfocused eyes, Callen began to breathe more slowly.

Anna continued to run her fingers through his short-cropped hair. "That's better. Just concentrate on your breathing. You're doing good."

Callen began to blink more slowly, until he was finally unable to hold open his droopy eyes.

A few moments later, the supper tray was delivered. Anna removed her hand from her sleeping patient's head. "Agent Hanna," She whispered. "You might as well eat what's on his tray. He isn't in any condition to eat right now."

"I'm good."

"You need to eat something. You won't be any good to him if you don't take care of yourself."

Sam lowered his head and chuckled.

"What?"

"Nothing. It's just... That's something my boss would say."

Anna smiled. "Then you would do well to listen to her. She's a wise woman."

Sam just smiled and shook his head.

Realizing that she was apparently dealing with another strong-willed member of this group, Anna dropped the matter for the time being. She covered Callen with a sheet and then moved toward the door. "I'll be back in just a little bit to see how he's doing."

Sam set the cup of ice on the window seal and took a seat in the chair beside the bed. His thoughts still on Hetty's maternal ways, he leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other. Sam recalled all the lectures, and stern looks from the Operations Manager, when she thought one of her team was not taking care of themselves properly, or when she thought they were unnecessarily treading on dangerous grounds. He smiled, thinking of how most of those lectures and looks were directed at his partner.

Sam's smile faded, once again feeling overwhelmed with concern for Hetty. She had a lot riding on her petite shoulders. The team had been "a man down" before. But this time, her injured agent's mental well-being was also at stake. This was a lot for Hetty to handle – a lot for the team to handle. Sam just hoped they could all hold it together long enough to get G through this.

Sam was brought out of his thoughts when he heard Callen move beneath the sheets.

Sam uncrossed his leg, and leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs in a "ready" position.

Callen's eyes blinked open. Before he had fully focused on his surroundings, he grasped the side rail with his left hand, pushed against the bar, and made a feeble attempt to roll over onto his back. His breath hitched and he suddenly stilled.

"Hold up, G. Let me get some help."

Seemingly unaware he was being spoken to, Callen turned his head to the right and tried, once again, to push himself onto his back. His features tensed from pain and he groaned.

"G. Wait," Sam said forcefully, causing Callen to flinch and then halt his movement.

Now stuck in a diagonal, half-lying position, Callen lifted his perplexed eyes up to Sam.

Sam pressed the nurses' call button, and then continued in a gentler tone. "You need to stop for a minute so I can call the nurse. You're hurting yourself."

Anna came through the door and to the bedside. Noting her patient's awkward position, she tilted her head to one side. "What happened here?"

Callen glanced up at the nurse with a pained expression.

Sam scrubbed his hand over his face. "He tried to turn over on his own."

"Maybe by tomorrow, Mr. Callen. But today, you need to let us help you. You're not supposed to be moving around that much." The nurse pulled the sheet down and scanned her patient from head to toe. "Agent Hanna? He has scooted almost completely off the draw sheet," She said while lowering the head of the bed. "We may have to just lift him. Do you mind?"

"Not at all."

Anna released the side rail, and Sam followed suit. She reached across the bed, untangled the IV tubing, took Callen's left hand, and laid his arm across his torso. She folded his right arm across his chest and nodded to the tall agent standing across from her.

Sam leaned down, slid one arm under Callen's knees, the other beneath his back, and lifted him up off the bed. Waiting until the nurse had straightened and smoothed the bed sheets, he carefully lowered the smaller man to the bed.

When Sam stood up straight, he was taken aback by the unsure look in his G's eyes. It was apparent that it was not just the fogginess from the medication. Being handled, having to be cared for, was foreign to his partner. This just seemed to be adding to Callen's insecurity and confusion.

By the time Sam had snapped out of his thoughts, Anna had raised Callen's head, covered him, secured the rail on her side, and had come around to his side to raise the rail.

"Sorry," Sam mumbled, ducking his head.

"Don't be. You were a big help getting him situated in the bed."

Anna leaned down to Callen's eye level. "Do you think you could drink something now?"

"Yes," He said quietly.

"Let me get some juice."

Over the next thirty minutes or so, in spite of being restless, and fighting through several waves of pain, Callen was able to consume a container of apple juice and a few sips of ice water. Anna was in and out several times, making sure he was taken care of and that he was as comfortable as possible.

But the following half hour found Callen in even more pain. When he was finally unable to stifle his moans, Anna knew it was time to intervene – her patient needed some relief – he needed to sleep. It took a bit longer than before to get him to a relaxed state, but the dedicated nurse stood beside him, lightly stroking the bend of his elbow, until he finally closed his eyes.

Anna lifted her hand from Callen's arm, turned and whispered to Sam. "Not so sure this will last very long."

"I'll take five minutes," Sam responded quietly. "As long as he's not hurting."

With a hopeful look, Anna held up two sets of crossed fingers before tiptoeing out of the room.

A while later Callen grimaced, his body tensing for a few seconds, before relaxing back into the mattress.

Seated beside the bed, Sam glanced at his watch, pleasantly surprised that Anna's "spell" had lasted for almost an hour before the pain had returned, and that G was somehow sleeping though the discomfort.

Still asleep, Callen had just settled after another wave of pain, when there was a tentative knock on the door. Eric's head appeared through a narrow opening in the door. After receiving Sam's hand signal to come in, the Tech Operator looked around cautiously, pushed the door open, and entered the hospital room.

Nell was right behind him, carrying a small wicker basket with a bright blue balloon attached to the handle. "How is he?" She asked softly when the pair had reached the side of the bed.

Sam rose to his feet. "He's been better," He responded, keeping his voice low.

"Hetty told us about his negative reaction to one of the drugs."

Sam looked down at G and shook his head. "Yeah. It's been rough."

"Well, his allergy to Theradin has been added to his agency medical file. Per Hetty's instructions, it's in bold letters, all caps, and underlined."

"Good."

"Is he still disoriented?" Nell whispered.

"I think he at least knows who people are now. As far as exactly what's going on? Not so much."

Callen suddenly shifted his weight and moaned softly.

Eric tensed and took a quick step back from the bed.

Sam eyed him suspiciously. "What's up with you?"

Eric's eyes shifted nervously from Callen, to Sam, and back to Callen. "Nothing."

"That wasn't nothing."

"I... I just thought he was about to wake up."

"Eric. He's not gonna bite you."

"I know. I'm not afraid of him... Well... I am afraid of him, but that's not..." Eric froze in mid-sentence, and shook his head. "Never mind."

"Eer-ric?" Sam's warned without having to raise his voice.

The blonde lowered his head in embarrassment. "You'll think it's stupid."

Sam crossed his arms over his chest, pressed his lips together, and glared across the bed at the Tech.

Concluding that the big SEAL was not going to drop this, Eric let out a breath. "It's just that... When you guys are out on an Op – driving at unfathomable speeds, people shooting at you, things blowing up all around you – the only way I can focus on my job is to think of you as... Well, invincible."

Sam's eyebrows knitted together. "Come again?"

Eric blushed. "I knew you'd think it was stupid."

"I didn't say that."

Nell placed her hand on her tech partner's forearm. "It's not stupid, Eric. It's just a natural coping mechanism for us."

"You do it, too?" Eric squeaked.

"Of course." Nell turned her attention to Sam and continued in a quiet voice. "It would throw me off my game if I were to allow myself to think about what could happen to you guys when you are in dangerous situations – the possibility of you being injured, or worse. So when we're watching you from Ops, I just sort of imagine you as super-heroes."

"Okay?" Sam began, still not quite getting it. "But that still doesn't explain Eric almost bolting on us while ago?"

The young Tech Operator looked at the floor, his chin dropping to his chest. "Seeing Callen like this... Well... It's sort of unnerving... scary."

Sam lowered his eyes to his sleeping partner. "Because he's not a super-hero."

"Exactly." Eric raised his head and looked across to Sam. "I know I sound nuts. But that's why I never came back to the hospital after the day Callen was shot."

"I just thought Hetty had you busy trying to hunt down who was responsible for the shooting."

Eric gazed off to the side, and slowly shook his head. "All that blood… Tubes and wires everywhere… It was a long time before I could erase that image from my brain."

Looking down at Callen, Sam let out a long breath through his nose. "You're not nuts. I still haven't gotten the image out of my head."

Silence fell on the room for almost a minute.

"Everyone's been pretty worried about him," Nell said softly. "Kensi and Deeks wanted to head straight over here after changing clothes. But Hetty's making them file their reports first."

Sam grinned. "That's our Hetty... So they're done with the Op?"

"Yep," Eric said, snapping out of his moment of reflection. "Audio, and visual are in place. They even managed to put trackers on Zamora's rentals. The D.C. office has a team assigned to surveillance, so Hetty ordered the two of us to take the rest of the night off."

All eyes went to Callen when he groaned and raised his left hand to his now scrunched up face. With his eyes barely open, he clumsily rubbed his left eye with the backs of his fingers. Then something in his field of view caught his attention. Blinking slowly, he held his hand up above his head, and frowned at the long ties streaming down from his wrist restraint. He squinted up at Sam and then rubbed his droopy eyes again.

Nell bit down on her lower lip to keep from smiling. The very man who had once teased her about looking like a kid running away from home, now looked, himself, like a small child just waking up from a nap.

Sam leaned down, resting his forearms on the rail. "You thirsty?"

Callen lowered his hand to his chest, blinked a few times, and then nodded.

Armed and ready, the big SEAL turned around and picked up the water pitcher he had placed in the window seal the last time his friend was awake.

While Sam was filling a cup with water, Callen raised his hand to his forehead and ran his finger along the small bandage there.

Sam sat the pitcher down and lightly pushed G's hand away from his forehead. "Leave that alone."

Callen obediently rested his hand on his torso, and took a few sips from the cup Sam was holding.

As he was lowering his head back down to the pillow, Callen was suddenly aware that there were other people in the room. Looking a bit confused, he gazed at Eric for a few seconds. Then, while studying Nell's face, he caught a glimpse of something high above his head. With raised eyebrows, he looked up in wonder at the shiny balloon hovering over him. His eyes followed the long white ribbon, all the way down to the basket Nell was holding. He lifted his head off the pillow and peered curiously at the contents of the basket – a colorful arrangement of Tootsie Pops.

Nell smiled sweetly at the Senior Agent. "These are for you." She selected a purple sucker from her basket and tucked it into Callen's left hand.

G looked down at the candy he was holding, and then up at Sam. The left corner of his mouth turned up ever so slightly.

Sam chuckled. This was the first hint of a smile he had seen on his partner's face in a while. "Good job on guessing the right candy, Nell. I think these are close to the top of his 'junk food list.'"

"Welcome. But it wasn't a guess. I knew he liked them."

Eric smirked at the perplexed ex-SEAL. "And that you occasionally enjoy the ancient art of paper-folding."

"How do you two know about the Tootsie Pops and the origami?"

Eric exchanged glances with his female partner. "I keep telling you guys, on the stakeouts where you're wired for sound, we can hear everything in Ops."

"Eeh-verything," Nell echoed.

Sam tucked his lips between his upper and lower teeth, and nodded slowly. He looked down at his friend, who was beginning to show signs that the pain was returning.

Sam's eyes narrowed and he leaned down. "G. You need anything? You want me to get the nurse?"

"No," He answered in a faint, raspy voice. "I'm alright."

When Callen closed his eyes, Sam looked up at Eric and Nell with raised eyebrows, obviously not buying his partner's response.

Nell placed the candy arrangement on the small table next to the bed. "Well, we better get going so he can rest."

"Yeah," Eric added. "We should. Deeks and Kensi had just started their reports when we left. So they should be up here within the next hour."

Sam stood up straight. "Oh. Eric. I have something I need you to do." His eyes went to the table where Nell's gift basket now sat. "Top drawer."

Eric opened the drawer, picked up a small camcorder, and held it up with a questioning look. "This?"

"Yeah. Hetty needs to take a look."

"Okay?" He slid the drawer closed. "I'll upload it to the office as soon as I get down to my car."

"Thanks, Eric. And thanks for the suckers, Nell."

The Tech Operator and Intelligence Analyst took one last lingering look at Callen before exiting the room.

As soon as the door had closed, Callen's eyes shut more tightly, and he groaned through gritted teeth.

With worry in his eyes, Sam bent over, both hands gripping the rail of the bed. He shook his head, thinking to himself, Holding back how bad he hurt until the younger team members had left?... So much a G Callen thing.

Sam knew that this was not nearly over. But seeing even the tiniest bit of G's personality return gave him a flicker of hope.