Trigger Warnings: use of gag, sleep deprivation, and drugs imbibed through food to induce lethargy.
Author's Note: Surprise! This chapter is going up early for anyone else that may have had a crappy Monday. Have some angst lol Hope you enjoy!
Chapter V
The food came, and Ahsoka ate it grudgingly, knowing if she was ever going to be able to make another escape attempt, she would need her strength.
She watched the hole in the ceiling, trying to gauge the time, but for some reason it eluded her. She felt a little off, her head constantly throbbing with a slight headache from the crystal's presence. But it was more than that. There was a fuzziness at the edges of her mind, and lethargy took over her body, so that she could barely move.
One time she tried to get up, to give her cage a proper examination for weaknesses, but her body felt so heavy that she fell to her knees after taking only two steps. She had just lain down on the ground and stayed there, staring at the wall. The cool wind that blew through the grate from the outside rippled across her skin, forming goosebumps. She could smell the scent of salt on the air, and occasionally would hear the cry of a bird. How lovely, she thought dreamily. I've got an oceanside prison! She giggled slightly, her skin scraping on the ground. Mid-giggle she froze, a frown appearing on her face. "What's wrong with me?" she called aloud to the empty room. The fuzziness made it hard, but eventually she came to the conclusion that they must've put something in her food. Something to dull her mind and body, keep her from meditating, and turning her thoughts to escape.
Well it had worked.
The light from the grate dimmed, and her prison fell into shadow.
She fell asleep where she lay.
She had only been asleep for an hour when suddenly there was a raucous clanging noise. She flinched awake, still on the ground because the lethargy hadn't left her yet. Barely managing to cover one ear with her cuffed hands, she pressed the other ear into the ground in a rather futile attempt to block it out. Two minutes of the alarm… and then it just stopped.
Ahsoka gingerly removed her hand, looking cautiously up at the ceiling. The room stayed silent.
Slowly her eyelids drooped, and she fell fast asleep once more.
This time only five minutes passed, and the awful screeching, clanging jolted her awake again. She found the drug-induced lethargy gone this time, so she sat up, rubbing at her eyes. Now only lack of sleep made her body feel heavy. But that she could cope with.
Two more minutes and the alarm quieted. By this time, Ahsoka had made her way to the bench, one leg pulled up in front of her, taking "inventory" of the dirty tricks Dooku had already pulled less than two days into her captivity.. She counted off on one hand. Confinement. Dark Side crystals, drugs, and sleep deprivation. Oh, and electric shock gag. Can't forget that one. She hung her head in her hands. Why did she get the feeling this was only the beginning?
When dawn broke, Ahsoka was awake with it, having only been allowed two hours of sleep the whole night. Ahsoka was used to working with lack of sleep, but this was something else entirely.
Sitting on the bench with her back to the wall, she felt her eyes drooping again.
The sound of clanking footsteps woke her right up.
This time she kept her eyes open. She didn't have the strength to face another shocking.
But Dooku didn't show. It was four commando droids, who opened the gate and told her to follow. Stepping out into the hall, she brought bound hands up in a flurry as one of the droids pulled a hood over her head from behind. She tried to calm her frantic breathing as they led her away.
They had been programmed well with stealth tactics. She figured that part out rather quickly, as she tried to keep track of their movements, and was rewarded with nothing but confusion for her efforts. Up halls, down halls, left turns and right. She was almost certain they even double-backed a few times, just to throw her off. Unfortunately, it worked.
Finally, they stopped at what must have been a door. Ahsoka could easily tell this was their final destination, as she could feel the strong presence of the crystal from inside. Her throbbing headache doubled, as did her diminished connection with the Force.
The door slid open.
A metal hand pushed her roughly from behind. Her foot caught on the lip of the door and she went sprawling. The hood flew off as she hit the ground, landing at Count Dooku's feet.
She cautiously glanced up, knowing her cheeks were red from embarrassment, wishing they weren't.
"A pleasure to see you again, Padawan Tano. I trust you had a restful night?"
She got to her feet, her bound hands clenched in fists. Shooting him a withering glare that would have had Anakin quailing, she answered, "I think you know the answer to that."
Walking around to his desk, he shot her a glare of his own. "It is good that you do not bottle up your anger like the Jedi would have you do. It is good that you let your anger at your… situation out," he said with a smile. "But." The smile disappeared to be replaced by his more familiar, imposing glower. "It should not be directed at me."
Ahsoka drew herself up to her full height. "Do not mistake my outward manner for my true emotions. All Jedi feel emotion. It is a true fact for almost all beings in the galaxy. But the power of a Jedi is in not lingering on those feelings. Not letting them consume you. You should know that." She paused to put a little more bite in her words. "So if you expect me to listen to a word you say, or do anything you command… you had better let me go right now." Right then, facing down the Count, Ahsoka did not feel fear. She didn't feel anger, or hurt, or sadness. She felt determined. She knew she could outlast anything he threw at her, because she was a Jedi trained by the Chosen One himself. What in the name of the Force could she possibly have to fear from this Fallen man?
She only gulped the tiniest bit at the steely resolve she saw glinting in the Count's eyes.
"So be it," were his only words before he reached into his desk and pulled out a large circle of silver. The metal caught the dim light faintly as he came around the desk toward her.
Ahsoka wasn't exactly sure what to make of the device; until the four commando droids closed in around her, two directly at her back and the other two each grabbing one of her arms. Her alarm grew exponentially as she felt a force - the Force, pushing her head back, leaving her neck exposed.
Her breaths started coming faster and faster, as she suddenly realized she might know what the device was. Her head tried to twist away before she'd even instructed it to, but he had too strong of a hold on her. No, no, no, no! She yelled in her mind, not quite yet reduced to begging out loud. At the Count's self-satisfied smirk though, she wondered if she had said it aloud. Or perhaps he had just seen the realization in her eyes.
Either way, snap! Went the collar around her neck, and begging became the last thing on her mind.
Her entire world had disappeared. Her eyes went wide in shock, her suspicions confirmed as Ahsoka reached out automatically to seek comfort in the one constant presence in her life… and felt nothing. There was nothing out there to feel safely cocooned in, nothing to commune with, nothing to pour her jumbled emotions into. With the crystal, the Force had still been in sight, the crystal had just kept it out of reach. But with this collar digging into her neck… it was like the Force had never been. It had blinkered out of existence.
And it was agonizing.
Ahsoka heard a low, guttural moan, like a wounded animal. It was a terrible, heart wrenching sound. She realized it was coming from her.
Already confined in body, partially confined in mind - the drugs earlier in the day, as well as that damn crystal - and now… completely, utterly confined in spirit. Ahsoka staggered as the full impact of the Force's absence hit her senses, sagging in the droid's grip. She felt dazed, unable to stop the moans that left her lips as each moment without the Force grew longer and longer.
The Count simply stood there, taking it all in, clearly enjoying the show. The corner of his mouth was turned up in a smirk and his eyes glittered with satisfaction.
"It is always a painful experience wearing the collar." Turning his back on her, he walked back around to his desk. "It is just a band of metal to anyone else in the galaxy. But to those of us sensitive to the Force…" He shook his head sadly. If Ahsoka had had the power to care about him and his words even the smallest bit right then, she would have been - not - positively touched by his sympathy.
As it was, she didn't even look up.
She felt the Count's annoyance at her lack of attention, and so wasn't surprised when she felt her head yanked back again so her eyes were on level with his. The roughness of it, however, did draw a sharp intake of breath from her throat.
He touched a button on his desk, and suddenly flood lights placed behind him blinded her.
As she blinked and squinted, he began speaking. "It is time for your third and most important lesson. Your elders are always right."
Ahsoka's voice was raspy as she snapped back, "I suppose you're referring to yourself?"
He nodded sagely. "You begin to grasp the lesson already!" He waved a hand at the lights behind him. "How many lights do you see?"
She frowned, blinking hard, still adjusting to her Forceless reality. What kind of a question is that? To anyone with eyes to see, there were clearly four lights. The Count had to know that, they were in his office for Force sakes.
He repeated himself calmly. "How many lights do you see?"
"There are four lights," she said, her tone making her unsaid word stand out. Obviously.
"No," he continued, voice just as calm as before. "There are three lights."
Three lights? Ahsoka looked at him like he had three heads.
"How many lights do you see?"
Ahsoka was in far too much mental distress, and far too physically exhausted and hungry for these mind games. "There are four lights." Are you crazy?
"No," he insisted. "That is wrong. There are only three lights."
What on earth was this guy playing at?
"I will ask you one more time. How many lights do you see?"
Her answer was swift and firm, like the stroke of a lightsaber. "There are four lights."
He gave a long sigh as the lights turned out, and she squinted in the new darkness. "I can see we have our work cut out for us." He sat down, waving a hand dismissively at her guards. "Take her to Despair."
"Wait, what?" Ahsoka just wanted to go back to her cell and collapse. Her mind and body were currently taxed to their absolute maximum, and she couldn't take any more of this… this torture - she finally admitted to herself - any longer. "No, just let me go." The guards ignored her, continuing to drag her toward the door. Ahsoka's tenuous control on her emotions broke. "You will never get what you want from me!" She couldn't even raise her voice, considering she'd had almost no fluids at all in the last she-didn't-even-know hours. "Do you hear me? Let. Me. Go." Automatically, she reached for the Force to make the latter a persuasion, and her mind broke anew when the contact didn't come.
She was dragged over the threshold, despite her attempts to throw off the droids, and the door whooshed closed just as her gag snicked shut around her mouth.
A single tear fell down her cheek as she was carried away.
