Rendershipping (Jonouchi x Seto x Pegasus)

(Anime continuity…sometime before Millennium World arc I guess…I'm not sure when this happens…)

It was Seto's worst nightmare, but unfortunately, he was still awake.

"Tell me again what the hell you two are doing here?" he said, clenching his fists enough to leave marks on his palms.

"Don't ask me," Jonouchi said, scowling. "He dragged me over here."

The "him" in question was Pegasus J. Crawford, who was currently humming a tune that neither of them knew and neither of them ever wanted to hear again.

"Pegasus, so help me, if you keep singing stupid American pop songs under your breath, I will call security and see that you are thrown out violently."

Pegasus merely laughed lightly. The tall, white haired American man had one of those smiles on his face, which told Seto he was trying to plan something that would get Seto out of his office. Well, there was a snowball's chance in hell that he was leaving his office today – he had nearly three meetings, two important phone calls, a business e-mail to answer, and some project proposals to review.

He glanced irritably across at Jonouchi, looking for something to vent his anger on.

The sullen, blond haired boy glowered at Kaiba, his arms folded and his foot tapping against the ground. His shoulders were pulled up and stiff in agitation. Just looking at him made Seto feel like throwing something. If there was one thing he didn't need today, it was a hyperactive, eccentric American businessman and an irritable, second-rate, bleached hair duelist with a grudge to settle.

"Have you seen how nice it is outside today, Kaiba-boy?" Pegasus asked, gesturing outside the window. "It's positively glorious!"

"Yes, and?" Seto asked.

"Would ya stop glaring at me, already?" Jonouchi said. "It ain't my fault I'm here. Turn that ugly face at Pegasus instead."

"Only if you'll turn your dog face away first, mutt."

Jonouchi flared, his already tense expression starting to burst.

"Take that back, ya bastard."

Seto simply scowled and glared at Pegasus again.

"Why are you here?" he asked. "More importantly, why did you bring him?"

"Because it's spring, Kaiba-boy, and here you are cooped up in your office! I bet you haven't even heard a bird sing yet."

"Hearing the birds sing does not affect my company's stocks. And if anyone should be in their office, it's you, Pegasus. You keep flying out to Japan for absolutely no reason, draining your already dropping resources, and you don't seem to give a damn!"

Pegasus grinned.

"You're right, I don't," he said. "Duel Monsters was a means to an end, Kaiba-boy, and I did not receive the end I wanted. I think it's probably time I stopped worrying about means that no longer have purpose. What about you, Kaiba-boy? What end are you looking for?"

He glanced over at Jonouchi.

"And Jonouchi-boy, how about you?"

Jonouchi blinked a couple times, as though surprised he had been addressed.

"Me? What do I have to do with this lover's spat of yours?"

Seto shot Jonouchi a death glare, which only seemed to prompt a huge grin from Jonouchi. The blond boy obviously thought he had hit a nerve, and decided to enjoy Seto's fury while he could.

"I'm going to press this button," Seto said, his finger hovering over the security button.

"No, you're not," Pegasus said.

"And what's going to stop me?"

"Well…"

Pegasus stood up slowly from the chair he had commandeered. For a second, he seemed to hesitate, his single visible eye flicked to Seto, and then Jonouchi. The next move came without warning. Pegasus grabbed Jonouchi's arm, pulled him around the desk, and practically pushed him at Seto. The two shocked boys tumbled to the ground in a flurry of yelps and tangled limbs.

Seto shoved Jonouchi off of him, swearing both mentally and out loud.

"Pegasus, what the –" he started.

"Damn, what the hell was that for –"

Both boys froze midsentence when they saw a mischievous Pegasus waving a camera.

"Oh, wasn't that a scandalous photo," he said. "Wouldn't want that on the Internet, would we?"

Seto could feel the rageful heat pumping into his face, but Pegasus interpreted as something different, which only made Seto angrier.

"Oh, Kaiba-boy's getting flustered!"

"Pegasus, give me that damn camera!"

"Yeah, give it!" Jonouchi shouted.

Pegasus laughed and dangled the camera just out of reach. Both boys swiped for it and missed, wild in their fury.

"I'll delete it if you leave the office for a day, Kaiba-boy," Pegasus said. "That's all you have to do!"

"But why me too?" Jonouchi said.

Seto sent a furious glare at Jonouchi, convinced that this was just as much his fault as Pegasus'.

So that was why Pegasus had brought Jonouchi.

A/N: There, Puppyshippers. That's about all the fanservice you're gonna get. You can thank Pegasus for that. Next is Relyshipping (Jonouchi x Shizuka). Why, why, WHY? Incest…rawr….