A/N: Wowzers, thank you all for the nice feedback on the first two chapters! I'll admit I'm still having quite a bit of withdrawal symptoms from my last story but I'm warming up to this one quickly :) Here's chapter 3 for you...hope you like!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.


Chapter 3

February, 2012

Los Angeles, California

Moving to Los Angeles was never in Alina's plan, even before she became a doctor. Having spent her entire childhood being shipped back and forth from New England to Russia with her parents, she had already come to the conclusion that a life of sunshine and pretty movie stars running on the beach was not for her.

It was, once again, a fight with her mother that led to her picking up the phone and dialing Dr. Charlotte King's office in California, accepting her offer into St. Ambrose hospital's new emergency medicine fellowship program. In fact, a fight with her mother seemed to be the catalyst behind every major decision she'd ever made in her adult life – coming back to the United States to get her B.S. at Vassar, choosing Harvard over Yale – where her mother got hired to teach at just after Alina graduated college – for medical school, breaking off her engagement to a promising young lawyer, and finally, going into the "soft and squishy" profession of pediatrics at Mass. General, instead of something more hardcore like cardiology, like her mother.

Deep down, Alina knew what her father told her time and time again was true, that her mother, the "well-known and respected Dr. Alexandra Levin of Saint Petersburg slash Yale University," only wanted what was best for her; she just had a difficult time of showing it. Her mother didn't know this, but Alina had actually chosen to go in to pediatrics so she could give children the maternal affection she herself never received, to help lessen the fear that automatically came with being in the hospital as a kid.

Alina had been born in Connecticut, living in New York City for six years before her mother had been invited back to join the Saint Petersburg State University Medical Faculty, thus moving her and her father back to Russia. Both of Alina's parents were of Russian nationality with American citizenship, thanks to their graduate school degrees. But, unbeknownst to many, Alina was just the opposite, adopted as an infant out of a New York City agency.

She had lived in Russia through secondary school while her mother, Alexandra, taught at the medical school. Her father, Nicolas, had earned his Ph.D. in Physics from Columbia and was also a professor. Needless to say, it was expected from an early age that Alina would grow up immersing herself in the sciences. It never really occurred to her to search for her birth parents; for one, she had been moved to a completely different country, for another, it would send her mother up a completely different wall.

Yet interestingly enough to her, Alina's parents were very different. While her mother gave off a very "WASPy" vibe – as a New Englander would say – her father was the calmest, most loving person she knew. He was her favorite person in the world, always there to help her keep a level head when she would stress over school or work or whatever latest argument she had had with her mother. Alina used to think of him as a hero, the strongest man she knew for staying with an emotionally abusive wife, but as she grew older she learned that what a child thought of as heroism could actually be an adult's version of fear.

She replayed the "LA argument" with her mother over and over in her mind while lying in an on-call room bed one evening, three weeks into her fellowship program at St. Ambrose. Not two hours ago she had, quite literally, been thrown off a case by the infamous OB/GYN neonatal specialist Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery, a doctor she had spent over half her career as a pediatric resident worshipping at an altar.

She tried her hardest not to let the frustration she felt from her first encounter with the "incredible" doctor (who seemed to have taken on the case without any idea what she was doing) bring about feelings of frustration she harbored toward her mother, or make her wonder yet again why her mother seemed so hell bent at her not moving to Los Angeles, and exactly who she was talking about right before the argument had ended.

Alina was tired; she and her mother had been in a screaming match for the past hour and a half, and she was certain that despite the grandiosity of their Connecticut home, the neighbors wouldn't be above calling the police if this lasted any longer.

"Mother, I am done discussing this with you!" She had shouted in an angered Russian.

Alexandra had responded in kind. "We most certainly are not done discussing this! For you to turn down the job offer at Mass. General is insane! You came back here from Russia to pursue the best opportunities; it's bad enough you ruined that by choosing to specialize in pediatrics but to take a fellowship over a job is just…"

"Just what, Mother? If anything this will give me more experience and open up more opportunities!"

"More opportunities for what? To coddle some little kid when you could be in the OR, actually learning something!"

"Well that's where you and I are different," Alina said, her voice calm, but forceful. "I actually care about patient care, whereas you, you'd rather be in an OR tearing at someone's heart, or teaching those robots!"

"I am your mother young lady and you will do as I say and respect me, and I say you are not joining that program," her mother snapped, with eyes on fire.

"Yes," Alina said through gritted teeth. "I. Am."

It came to the point where she almost knew it was going to happen before it did. The sound of skin against skin, the slap of her mother's palm against her cheek. At almost twenty-nine years old, Alina could never forget what it was like, lying in bed at night as a child with bruises up and down her back; but as a child you always think it's going to stop once you get big enough to make it stop, and yet it never does.

Alina's hand flew to her cheek, in its faithful attempt to shield her from the inevitable burning sensation. She was well beyond tears; having lost so many as a child, nothing her mother did was ever worth the effort anymore. It was easier to just shut it out completely, hide it deep down inside.

"I am your mother, and you will do as I say," Alexandra hissed at her daughter.

Alina took a deep breath, her cheek pulsing. "Mother, you may have Papa wrapped around your twisted finger, but you do not have me." Her nostrils flared. "I am going."

I am going.

Alina could feel her cheek throbbing now, still lying down in the dark on-call room. She thought about Dr. Montgomery, and if Alexis Miller and her baby were going to make it. Everything in her medical training told her they wouldn't, but if anyone could do it, she knew Dr. Montgomery was the one…even if she never read the scans.

Alina closed her eyes and turned on her side, letting out a long sigh. She hadn't spoken to her mother since the move out here, and had little idea what to do about it. Her father would call her daily, and she would relish in the sound of his voice she missed him so much. Although he would tell her nothing about Alexandra unless she asked, and Alina knew he was only doing so because he thought that's what she would want; it wasn't what he wanted. But still, Alina could not face anything having to do with her mother.

She remembered racing out of the house that day in an unexpected rage, driving straight through to her apartment in Boston in less than two hours. There was one thing though, that her mother had said as she was leaving, so quiet a part of her wasn't sure it was said at all:

"You cannot go to Los Angeles because she is there."

Who "she" was, Alina had no idea, and a part of her was afraid to find out.

Moments later she heard loud footsteps approaching the on-call room door and she got the sinking feeling that in a moment, she would no longer be alone. Quickly, she pulled her auburn hair into a bun and sat up, trying to create the least element of surprise for the intruder.

The door opened, and immediately Alina wanted to roll her eyes. Of course it would be her, Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery. Alina stared her straight in the eye, waiting for Dr. Montgomery to make the first move.

"Oh," she scoffed. "Just wonderful."

"I'm not going to say 'I told you so' if that's what you're thinking," Alina said, adding "You couldn't have known, you didn't even look at her scans." If she had said something like that to her mother, her cheek would be earning another red mark right about now. But Dr. Montgomery didn't even flinch.

"Okay, spare me the condescending lecture, there was no saving that woman and you know it; she would have bled out no matter what we did."

Alina sighed, not wanting to argue with this woman who she secretly admired so much. "There's no use arguing it now; Alexis and the baby are gone." She felt a tug at her heart, thinking of that little baby. So much potential, and now she was dead.

Dr. Montgomery met her gaze again, except this time with softness in her eyes. "Since when did you work here anyway?"

"Three weeks ago," Alina replied automatically. "I've already completed my residency in pediatrics with Harvard at Mass. Gen., but then I found out about St. Ambrose's emergency fellowship program…"

…and I completely worship you as a doctor and everything you do, can I kiss your feet? Alina wanted to ramble, but stopped herself.

"St. Ambrose has a fellowship program?" Dr. Montgomery asked her, confused.

Alina was caught off guard. Weren't attending surgeons with privileges supposed to know what goes on in their own hospitals? "It's new this year…didn't you know? Or does Dr. King not keep her attending surgeons in the loop?"

"Apparently she doesn't," Dr. Montgomery said through gritted teeth.

Alina winced internally, sensing this doctor really didn't want to talk to her anymore. "Well if you don't mind I'm going to go find another room to sleep in. You look like you could use this one more than me." She stood up to leave, groaning internally that it was only just after dinnertime; she still had another ten hours left of being on-call.

"Wait," Dr. Montgomery called.

Alina spun around. "Yes?"

"What…what did you say your name was again?"

She wasn't expecting this. "I didn't, Dr. Wilder did. But it's Dr. Levin, Alina Levin."

Dr. Montgomery opened her mouth as if to speak again, but Alina's heart was beating so fast just being in the presence of this great doctor and at the possibility that maybe, just maybe this great doctor didn't hate her after all. Before Dr. Montgomery could say anything, Alina turned and left without so much as a handshake.

She had no idea who her mother was talking about when she said "she is there," but, Alina thought, maybe if she stuck around long enough she could find out.


Addison stormed into Dr. Charlotte King's office the next morning in a huff, pulling the door shut behind her. Charlotte was on the phone, but after seeing the look on Addison's face, hung up quickly.

"When the hell did Ambrose start a fellowship program?" Addison asked, forcefully.

"Excuse me?" Charlotte raised an eyebrow, daring Addison to repeat herself.

"I asked, when the hell did Ambrose start a fellowship program?"

"And just what makes you think you can come bargin' in here on your high horse? Last time I checked it was my hospital, I do what I want."

Typical Charlotte response. As much as Addison had actually come to like the woman over the years, right now she really just wanted to slap her.

"While I don't owe you any explanations, I started the program because I thought it would be good for the hospital, build up the reputation. And it just so happens we took in a damn fine group of doctors-"

"I know," Addison muttered, interrupting. "I met one."

"The Russian? Yeah, Pete told me you threw the poor girl off a case last night for disagreeing with you on something she ended up being right about, by the way. What in God's name has gotten into you, Montgomery?" Charlotte asked.

Addison sighed, making a mental note to remember the Russian accent and then wondering why she even wanted to make a mental note in the first place. She opened her mouth to give Charlotte some snarky retort, but nothing came out.

"I…" she stuttered. "I can't sleep." With that she turned on her heel and left.


"Come on Addie, why don't you give the surrogacy thing a shot?" Amelia asked later that night as the two of them outside on Addison's back porch. "I stand by what I said before – you get your baby, someone else's boobs take the hit."

Addison chuckled. "I know, I know, it's just…it was hard enough with the IVF not working and watching my own body let me down. I don't know if I can watch another woman carry my baby and not…freak out all the time." She took a sip of her sparkling water, Milo the cat purring softly on her lap.

"Isn't that all supposed to be part of the surrogate experience though?" Amelia asked, somewhat sarcastically. "You freaking out about the woman's every move, telling her if she doesn't lie down with her legs in the air for an hour every day for the first trimester the baby will be born with three heads?"

"Oh ha ha." Addison rolled her eyes. "Maybe I would find that funnier if it were even remotely close to true…"

"Look, I know you've been put through the ringer one too many times with this whole baby thing, but I really think you should give it a shot. And that's coming from me; I'm like the anti-mother."

Addison snorted. "You're not the anti-mother, you've just…made up your mind about it. And so have I, I'm just…waiting for the universe to give me a sign."

"Maybe surrogacy could be your sign," Amelia shrugged.

"I don't know," Addison sighed. "I'll think about it, okay?"

Amelia nodded, looking out into the ocean.

"Hey how are you doing, really?" Addison asked gently, after a moment.

Amelia took in a deep breath. "I'm okay…I'm good. I told you I was staying sober and I am. I think…I think it's gonna be okay, and you're gonna get your baby."

Addison sat up, taking her sister's hand. A million thoughts were swimming through her head, but there was only so much she could put into words. "You are gonna be okay."

I guess if you want something badly enough, then maybe getting your shins pummeled is a fair price. I want a baby.

I'm gonna have a baby.


Thanks for reading! Reviews are warmly welcomed :)