ZW 2010 Day 1: Family
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The Perils of Marrying Katara: Zuko's Tribulation
Katara's family welcomes Zuko to the family as only Katara's family can. Zuko wonders, briefly, whether his new bride is intentionally allowing this misery.
Sokka comes up behind him and slaps his shoulder just as Zuko has taken an inadvisably large gulp of arctic wine. They just had to have a second ceremony in the South Pole, didn't they? "Just so you know, Katara's a pain to live with. And super picky about stupid stuff. Good luck."
Zuko coughs and hacks for a moment, alternating between letting himself suffocate on the alcohol and trying to cough through the burn that's twice as intense on the way back up. "You're-" Zuko stifles a particularly forceful cough "-just telling me this now?"
Sokka grins far more widely than Zuko feels is proper at a formal event and slaps his back (it's slightly harder than the last slap, and Zuko wonders if there's a reason Sokka keeps hitting him. Or at least he does until his attention is slightly diverted by the sudden need to find the nearest iceberg and throw up everything in his stomach). "Eh. Must have slipped my mind."
Zuko narrowly misses the next slap to his back. "Thanks."
Sokka saunters away, leaving Zuko to wonder what he's gone and gotten himself into this time. Katara can't be that bad, can she? Sokka's probably just tired of having to put his dirty socks in a neat pile or something. On the other hand, she always ran a tight campsite…Maybe he needs more arctic wine after all.
…
He sees Hakoda approaching him out of the corner of his eye. For a moment Zuko debates running and hiding. As it turns out, he should have.
"Fire Lord Zuko."
"Uh, just Zuko is fine, sir."
Hakoda grins, and Zuko wonders if it's his imagination or if his new father-in-law has suddenly grown tiger shark teeth. "I think it's time Sokka and I took you ice dodging."
Suddenly, Zuko is unconcerned. Can't he just melt the ice?
(It's really too bad no one was kind enough to mention that Hakoda had planned for that. They went to the coast of the Earth Kingdom and dodged rocks. As Sokka so helpfully pointed out, if he could do it, there was no reason Zuko couldn't, and there wasn't really any good argument against that.)
…
Zuko has escaped Hakoda, only to be cornered by Gran Gran (whom he's been carefully avoiding, what with how snarkily she'd accepted his apology for the manhandling.
"Young man!"
Zuko stops in his tracks. "Uh, good evening, Great and Mighty Chief's Mother-"
"Did Sokka tell you to say that?"
Zuko looks as though he's sucked on a lemon. "He said that was the proper-"
Gran Gran barks a laugh. "We don't have titles here. Now come, it's time for the ceremonial sea prune stew tasting."
"Sea prune stew tasting?"
Gran Gran nods sagely. "Of course. Katara is waiting for you."
Zuko can tell, upon Gran Gran telling Katara that it's time for the traditional sea prune stew ceremony, that his new wife has never heard of this in her life. Unfortunately for him, she is more than happy to play along. Zuko suddenly realizes that Sokka learned the great majority of his sense of humor from his father and grandmother. Thank the spirits Katara just tells stupid jokes.
Regrettably, he says that part out loud and quickly finds himself soaked in sea prunes.
When he returns to the Fire Nation, he is informed his South-Pole-friendly clothes cannot be cleaned and will have to be burned. Aside from the fact that the palace smells like burnt sea prunes for three days afterward, Zuko thinks that's the best thing to come out of the South Pole trip (because now he never has to go again, right? Wrong, but Zuko doesn't know that yet). Except being officially married to Katara, of course.
…
A/N: A little less crackish than the last one, but I think I'm not ready to get angsty again. I'm trying to get in the zone for Tinted Windows and it's just not working. I also took some liberties with Gran Gran, just because I'm really not sure how she'd react to Zuko. Reviews welcome! Thanks to all those who have already reviewed/followed/favorited. Y'all cool.
