Hi, I'm back. I told you I wouldn't be here every day. This is the longest chapter, I believe, so please do enjoy it. Critique is begged for, over and over, begged for. Begged for. Begged for. Shout out to micahk for following and favoriting, shout out to ASkipInTime for following, and nobody important for reviewing. Nobody important? 900 years of traveling through time and space, and I've never met anybody who wasn't important.
Joi to the World
"Winter. Wwwwinter winter winter. Winter. I hope you're writing this down," said Flowey. The man he was driving next to sniffed and wrote something down on his clipboard. Flowey adjusted the controls on his wagon toy and faced the door to room eleven. The door was shut. The man waited. Flowey backed up his wagon before driving forward and hitting the door with a light thump. He backed up and hit the door again. And again. Over and over...
The door finally opened, and a goat woman as tall as the man greeted them. "Greetings, sir. You must be the official PTA person with official business whose only purpose is to progress the plot. I am Toriel, a teacher at this school." She smiled down at the sentient flower. "How was the tour, Flowey?"
"Fine, I guess," he replied, shrugging his leaves. "I mean, as fine as a tour of a school can go."
"That's good to hear." Toriel stepped back into the room and gestured to the man. "Please, do come in. Everyone has been awaiting your arrival—"
"HEY whoa whoa," said Flowey, revving his engine. "Who's the head of the PTA here?"
"Of course. Forgive me, Flowey."
"You get a warning. Now pick me up, mom."
"I am not your mother."
"Denial."
Toriel sighed and bent over to hoist the flowerpot and wagon combo. The man walked past them into the room, clipping a short and irritable sigh.
"BEEP BEEP BEEP!" said Flowey. "Official flower business! Get out of my chair, Linda!"
Linda grumbled something about letting monsters run the PTA and the children's safety as she stomped away from Toriel's teacher desk and into one of the student desks like the rest of the parents. Toriel placed Flowey onto the desk and squeezed into a tiny desk between Sans and Linda, who were glaring at each other spitefully.
"BEEP BEEP," said Flowey as he beeped the horn on the controls. "Howdy, folks. I'm Flowey. Flowey the Head of the PTA."
"We know who you are," the parents chorused in unison. Flowey stuck his tongue out.
"Anyway, we have a special guest today from the state government, the official PTA person with official business whose only purpose is to progress the plot." The man stood next to the desk and looked important and stern and stuff. He wore a name tag that read, "Hi, I'm the official PTA person with official business whose only purpose is to progress the plot." It was amazing how he managed to fit that all in there.
The man pointed at the chair behind the teacher's desk. "May I take this?" he asked.
"Yeah, sure," Flowey waved him off. The man pulled the chair next to the desk and sat in it.
"I'm here to observe how the PTA meetings at this school take place and to make sure that it's all within regulation," he said. "For the record, I'd like to establish that... er, Flowey here is the wholly recognized PTA president, yes?"
"No," said everyone.
"The PTA president doesn't come to meetings," Flowey said. "The head of the PTA does. That's me."
"Aren't those positions the same thing?" the man asked.
"No," everyone said again.
"You sure got that wrong, buddy," Flowey said with a wink and a giggle. He leaned closer to the man. "Mix those positions up one more time and I'll end you." The man shivered at the fangs and black eyes that had been flashed at him by a flower.
"That may pose a problem, then," he cleared his throat to steady himself. "I have to talk to the one who officially sets actions the PTA votes on into motion."
"Well, golly gosh darn gee!" Flowey rolled his eyes. "Maybe if you had actually said that over the phone, we wouldn't have this issue, would we? Luckily for you, one of the parents here has them on call and can get the president in here."
"It's not even a real parent," Linda said loudly. "It has a hardboiled egg for a child."
"NO!1!" A voice shouted from the back. "Tem is pROUD pARENT!"
"Yes, yes, we know," Flowey shouted back. "Can you just call the president?"
"HOI!"
"Their child doesn't even attend this school! Oh, what am I saying, it's an egg, eggs don't attend school. Stupid monsters..."
"Do you want to have a bad time, Linda?"
"Shut up, Sans!"
"HOI!1!" A new voice that sounded identical to one of the parents in the room stopped everyone in the room. The man, who had been about to write something scathing on his clipboard, stopped and looked up at the still open door. Whatever it was, it was definitely a monster, he noted quickly on his clipboard. It skipped on its four paws up to the teacher desk and jumped on top next to Flowey.
"Hoi!" It said again. "PTA prez-E-dent Temmie is here!"
"Okay, the president's here now, are you happy?" Flowey asked the man.
"Mmm, yes," he said. "I'll be talking to them after this meeting, so please continue on with your normal schedule."
"Sheesh, what did you need the president for now, then? Whatever, like I was telling you in the hallway, we still need to discuss which winter play we're going to put on before break."
"Christmas play, you mean," Linda sniffed. "It is Christmas break, after all."
"Linda, we agreed last week that the official title was winter break, not Christmas break." Sans grinned not-happily at her.
"But it does happen around Christmas, not those other holidays," Helen piped up. "But that's not the point. I agree with Linda's notion from last week that we should do a nativity scene."
"The nativity scene is nice, ladies, but we should keep in mind that some families don't celebrate," Toriel said calmly. "Perhaps we should select a more inclusive and child friendly play."
"The nativity scene is perfectly child friendly!" Linda said indignantly.
"I never said it wasn't."
"You just want to put on some monster Christmas play, don't you?" Helen grumped.
"Monsters don't really have any Christmas plays, since we don't celebrate Christmas. We have similar decorations because of a seasonal event revolving around a story about giving gifts to a monster with trees for horns that were decorated by some unruly teens."
"What a vulgar story," Linda said, putting a hand to her chest, "and you want to recreate it for the children—"
"It's a beautiful day outside," Sans said, looking dramatically at the ceiling.
"Now listen to me you little—"
"NO! PTA prez-E-dent says... no foight! 'Kay?" Temmie stomped its front paw firmly on the table.
"But, Ms. Temmie..." Linda began.
"No foight! All agree, say 'HOI'!"
"Hoi?" some of the parents said, more as a question than a response.
"'Kay, 'kay, no foight!" The president, now confirmed a female, the man noted on his clipboard, vibrated intensely.
"Y-you're avoiding the problem!" Helen stammered.
"Yes," said Linda. "You just want to look like you won't pick sides. But we already know whose side you're on, don't we? It's all the same with you monsters."
Temmie made a strange smirk at the two ladies. "Is this a joke?" she asked coldly with a sharp sound on each word. "Are you having a chuckle? I'm the one with a degree, a successful business, and the presidency." The ladies sat down and looked at their laps. "That's what I thought."
The meeting continued on normally after that, the president making occasional interjections and vibrating noises. It was eventually decided that there would be a chorus in the stead of a play. Judges were decided, (two monsters and two humans, to the displeasured faces of some of the parents) and the meeting was adjourned. The official PTA person with official business whose only purpose is to progress the plot declined talking to the president afterwards, claiming to have "seen enough", which was just as well as the president had left due to vibrating too intensely. The man stepped outside the classroom and leaned against the hallway, muttering, "Monsters," before finishing the notes on his clipboard. Despite the arguments between the humans and monsters, it cannot be denied that the PTA is efficient enough at making decisions to not be forcefully ended. So it seems, the monster x human school will remain in good standing." The man frowned and reread his words. "Perhaps... I could word it... differently..." he placed the pen on the paper and was about to write when it felt like there was something on his back. He jumped away from the wall and saw a hole, and in the hole he saw a face. It was a Temmie.
"Hoi," it whispered. It took the clipboard by its mouth and pulled it into the hole. "You will regret this." The man blinked. The hole was gone now. The man slowly walked out of the building. The clipboard was returned to the state government building later on, along with the PTA grading paper. The notes had been left untouched.
Head canon I don't actually think #4: OSP = One School Pairing: monster x human school.
This chapter reaches back to the roots of humans who don't like anything monster, both in the PTA and in the government. Realistically, it might not be as blunt as it was here, but I'm not one to know about such things. Leave a review, tell me what you thought, and read my other stuff. Have a good night, all.
