Part 3 – Gumbrawl!

The rumble and roar of 15 candy engines echoed profusely across the landscape of sprinkle-coated taffy hills and candy cane forests as the fleet of racing karts zipped down the golden cake track.

For any given race, players would 'chews' both their avatar and the track they would compete on from the available racers and unlocked tracks. Upon doing so, the map was programmed to automatically teleport all the racers, karts, staff, and spectators to the chosen racecourse in a microsecond. That's how one moment the racers would be basking in the warm sunshine at the Royal Raceway…and the next moment zipping up their jackets with shivering hands as they stood in the frigid ice cream snow of Soft-Serve Summit. They would then scramble to their karts waiting at the starting line for the race that was about to begin. Of course, the players never got to see this transition. All they saw was the console's LOADING screen with prerecorded arial shots of the track.

But without the players' aid, the racers had to find their own means of transport if they wanted to get anywhere. Not a problem though; their candy karts weren't just built for racing. As for the everyone else, most of them usually used the transit system that was a merry little gingerbread train, which made stops at stations located near every racetrack.

"Where we going again?" Ralph called as he and Vanellope zoomed past the sparkling soda fountain of the village district.

"One of the new tracks from the update," Vanellope answered, her ponytail whipping wildly behind her. "Apparently, none of the players have scored enough Caramel Points to unlock it yet, but Taffyta says we can use it. It's practically brand spankin' new and she wanted us to do tonight's Random Roster Race there!"

Up ahead loomed the massive gumball machines of Gumball Gorge. It took Vanellope a moment to notice Taffyta racing up the cake slice ramp and diving straight in, each racer in the chain following one at a time.

Ralph's massive jaw dropped. "Hey, wait a minute!" he shouted in abrupt shock. "I thought we were just taking a leisure trip to the new track! You didn't say we were taking actual tracks to get there!"

"Looks like we're going with the cocoa flow, Chumbo!" Vanellope shouted back with glee, although she too was surprised that Taffyta was leading them through the obstacle courses and not the back roads they usually took to get from place to place. Granted, she knew nothing about Starburst Circuit, let alone how to get there. Maybe this was the route.

"Hold on to your cookies, Ralph!" she yelled, changing gears as Candlehead disappeared over the ramp. They were next.

Ralph bit his lip and clung to the spoiler as Vanellope's kart picked up speed. "Wish this thing came with a seatbelt!"

His loud holler could not be suppressed as he and Vanellope launched airborne off the cake and bounced upon the luscious red taffy track; gumballs of colossal sizes and colours were rolling straight for them from the towering machines lining the Gorge.

This was the first time Ralph had ever actually ridden through a racecourse. He swayed on the spoiler with his eyes wide and hair swept back, clinging to it so hard that he felt sure he was going to snap it right off.

"I really didn't sign up for this, kid!" he gasped.

"Well, you might wanna submit your application now," she called over the noise of thundering gumballs and roaring engines. "No turning back!"

The racers ahead of them were weaving this way and that to avoid the thundering obstacles. Vanellope caught a glimpse of the pink and green blur that was Minty Sakura drifting freely along the taffy wall at a 110-degree angle like it was child's play.

Gunning it fiercely, Swizzle shot through a stray shimmering power-up box hovering upon the track.

"BROWNIE BREAK!" the game announcer's voice shouted out.

A chrome-trimmed spatula catapult topped with a freshly-baked chocolate chip brownie sprang out of the Tongue Twister's hood. Swizzle whirled his kart around 180 degrees to face Candlehead and Vanellope.

"Sweets from heaven, ladies!" he shouted, jabbing the trigger button. The spring-loaded spatula released, arcing the chocolate slab through the air.

"He missed!" Ralph shouted. He thought the racers had better aim than that.

But Swizzle was riding on a different strategy. Instead of targeting either of the girls, he had deliberately aimed at the track; the hurling brownie broke open on contact, releasing a thick puddle of chocolate syrup that spread everywhere.

Too late to react, Candlehead skidded in the glop and spun out. Vanellope darted past her with a roar.

Ralph jabbed a warning finger forward. "Chocolate, dead ahead! I hate chocolate!"

"Dutifully noted, Stenchfest!" Vanellope shouted back as she avoided the gooey hazard by driving along the wall. Ralph gripped the spoiler hard to avoid slipping off.

Once back on level ground, they dodged a yellow gumball and snagged another power-up box. "All righto! Time to give Swizz his just-desserts!" Vanellope cracked as her kart took on the glittery power-up shimmer.

SWEET SEEKERS!

"Hey, Ralph! Ever played first-person shooter with a Sweet Seeker cannon before?"

"No, why-"

Ralph was silenced as a huge threatening cannon decked in striking flames sprang out of the hood right before his eyes, pointed at the racers ahead.

"This is why!"

Vanellope opened fire; three red-hot candies shot out like meteors and struck Swizzle, Jubileena and Rancis, tossing them into the air.

Ralph ducked quickly as a wheel from Rancis' kart flew past his head. "Holy sea cow, are they okay?!" he gasped, looking back over his shoulder. "That looked painful!"

"Of course, they're okay, Ralphie!" Vanellope scoffed, expertly spinning 360 degrees in her dodge of a surprise green gumball. "We're racers, this is what we do! Crashing, smashing, and blowing each other up with candy fire is just a bump in the rear fender. It's all in good, sweet fun!"

But memories of what had happened to Crumbelina flicked a brief jolt within her mind, prompting her to also peer back just to be sure. Relief quickly washed through upon seeing the trio back on their wheels of respawned karts as if nothing had happened.

"You just don't realize how crazy this sweet lil' racing game is when you're actually a part of it!" Ralph cried as Vanellope swerved hard to avoid a pile of Skittle Scatter. "And I thought Slaughter Race was intense!"

Even in the craze of dodging the gumballs and other hazards, Vanellope couldn't help but soak in Ralph's exclamation. He was right; this was intense. It was crazy. Almost as much as Slaughter Race when you really thought about it. Those gumballs had the capability of flattening anyone to a pancake before regeneration. Even though she could predict when and where most of them fell, it was still great fun to be racing on her familiar track with her old friends. Top that with a collection of mystery power-ups, and her heart was pounding with excitement just to be doing this! Besides, there was always the few odd balls that occasionally took her by surprise…

"Look out!"

Ralph's loud warning snapped her back to reality, just in time to face an orange gumball barreling too close towards them! But before she could jerk the wheel, Ralph's mighty fist shot forward like a giant boxing glove on a spring and pounded its opponent clean out of their way.

"Take that, ya oversized cough drop!" he boomed triumphantly.

"Nice save, Ralph!" his driver giggled.

Struck by the tremendous opposing force, the gumball shot over all the karts like a giant Sweet Seeker rocketing clean out of the Gorge.

Which it would have – had it not been for the gumball machine conveniently standing in its trajectory path. The gumball smashed right into the very machine that had dispensed it way ahead of Taffyta with a deafening shatter. The glass sphere disintegrated to pieces and ALL its contents came spilling out right onto the track.

Ralph's face fell. "Uh oh," was all he had time to say.

"LOOK SHARP!" The announcer's voice bellowed loudly. "IT'S A GUMBRAWL OUT THERE!"

The voice was lost to the surprised yelps and squeals that filled the chasm as all the racers were now suddenly taking on an entire stampede of gumballs that made the whole Gorge shake. Several racers were hit and sent back; others made successful dodges, only to accidentally slam into each other. But Vanellope quickly sized up the situation and worked fast; with her brow furrowed and teeth gritted in concentration, she managed to time her glitches to teleport herself, her kart, and Ralph safely through.

"S'cuse me – pardon me – comin' through – lady with a giant baby – hot soup – share the road!" she hollered at each racer and gumball that whizzed past in flashing pixels as she glitched sporadically along the track with a grin so wide, it looked like her cheeks had disappeared completely.

"Woo-hoo! I've never felt so alive!" she cheered.

"I've never felt so dead!" Ralph howled, gripping the spoiler like it was his lifeline. "Are we in Sonic's game?!"

"No, but we might as well be!" Vanellope cried back, her ponytail flailing like a rogue whip. "That was wicked! Why haven't we raced together before?!"

"I think I might have a good idea," Ralph groaned, taking one hand off the spoiler to clutch his stomach.

Glancing back to make absolute certain that all the racers were back on their wheels, he gripped the spoiler yet again as they sailed out of Gumball Gorge and landed down roughly on the icing-bordered track. They had now entered the Cakeway, the environment featuring cakes, more cakes, cupcakes, Marzipan Mountain, and its infamous jump out the chocolate wafer straw. Vanellope remembered that this was Candlehead's favourite spot.

Taffyta, who had managed to keep the lead, barked into her megaphone again. "Single file people…exit's comin' up!"

"Please don't shout," moaned Sour Bill. He looked rather sick as he clung wearily to Taffyta's seat.

Everyone quickly converged back into a long chain, albeit in a completely different order from which they had departed; Vanellope spied an opening and steered herself in between Rancis and Minty Sakura.

As Marzipan Mountain drew nearer and nearer, she suddenly feared the very real possibility that her kart might not be able to make the crucial jump at the top with Ralph's 643 pounds weighing them down considerably.

But suddenly, Taffyta jerked sharply to the right…to leap right off the track and speed down a rugged pathway between two large vanilla cupcakes.

"What the hey-heck is she doin'?!" yelped Vanellope as all the other racers in front began doing the same.

"Just follow us!" Rancis shouted back to her, steering his kart to leave the track. "You're gonna love this!"

Vanellope shrugged and turned her wheel. "Right behind ya! Looks like we're goin' off-road, Ralph!"

"Say what now?" Ralph exclaimed as they bumped onto the unpaved cake terrain, bits of cake crumbs kicking up by the wheels and spraying in all directions.

Then Vanellope gasped. The racers in front of her were driving straight into a massive red velvet cupcake.

But the cupcake remained untouched; they seemed to be warping through a peculiar and distinctly digital barrier concealed along the wrapper…just like her secret entrance in Diet Cola Mountain.

Ralph frowned. "I think I'm seein' déjà vu," he said, remembering his previous cupcake experience.

"So am I!" his driver squealed in sudden excitement. "Duck and cover that ham-head of yours!"

The next moment, Ralph and Vanellope vanished completely.

Minty Sakura was right behind them with Candlehead on her tail. "Kono gēmu wa dondon yoku natte imasu!" she exclaimed with a broad smile, passing straight through.

Candlehead giggled as she approached the colossal-sized cake. "I don't know why, but I feel right at home when I come through here!"