Bickershipping (Marik Ishtar/Jonouchi Katsuya/Kaiba Seto)
. . .
"Don't think that this is a date, or anything."
Marik just threw him a look, that one that Seto hated, with his lips clearly trying not to smile and a raised eyebrow that accentuated just how perfectly he had contoured his face.
"I just asked you two to come out for drinks. Contrary to popular belief, I do not try to romance everything that moves. Especially not wound up child CEOs."
"This, coming from the wound up child mafia boss."
The bar was fairly quiet considering the time of day, so Seto didn't feel too out of place there. The lighting was dim enough, too, that he could get away with just wearing a plain old turtleneck and never be recognized for who he actually was. No one ever recognized him without the coat. That was part of the reason he wore it in public so often—it was distraction so that he could sometimes walk around the city without getting mobbed by paparazzi.
Jonouchi had slipped off to the bathroom, thank god. What a weird fucking trio they made, too. Marik Ishtar, notorious former leader of an international crime organization turned student engineer, Jonouchi Katsuya, a wannabe duelist who had squeaked by a few noticeable wins in recent dueling circuits (Seto grudgingly acknowledged that those had happened), and Kaiba Seto, the CEO of the biggest gaming company in the world. Marik picked weird drinking friends—weirder still was that Seto had, for some reason, accepted the invitation. He still wasn't sure why.
"I was never a mafia boss, the mafia is something else entirely," Marik said casually, as though they were discussing the weather. "Though I suppose if my catacombs had been under Venice instead of the pyramids, I might have wandered up there and taken control of that instead."
"Cute," Seto said, rolling his eyes.
Marik caught Seto's eyes and, with a very straight face, said,
"Seto, some of us use overtaking vast criminal organizations to cope."
Seto tried to hold it back, but he couldn't stop the snort from rolling out of his throat. Marik flashed a grin too that glowed slightly in the tacky neon light signs hanging from the walls.
"Fair enough," he said. "I supposed you'd have to be as extra as that with your coping methods."
"Living under a literal rock for a few years makes you wanna go a bit wild when you realize you need to fix your fucked up brain."
"Are you two gonna sit there and compare shitty childhoods all night, or are we going to get food, because I'm starving."
Jonouchi slid back into the booth on Marik's side. Seto was glad Jonouchi didn't try to sit next to him.
"We're comparing coping methods, actually," Marik said. "I like to run evil shadow organizations in my spare time."
Jonouchi snorted, covering it with one hand as he snickered.
"My coping method is usually just punching something, but I guess that works too."
"Kaiba can probably buy premium coping methods."
"You'd think that, but actually coping methods are black market shit—you're probably more familiar with them, then, Marik."
Jonouchi actually chortled, gripping his stomach as his head flopped against the table.
"Oh my god—Kaiba, did you just—make a fucking joke?"
"Contrary to popular belief," Seto said dryly. "I'm a human being who sometimes enjoys humor."
"You had me fooled, I thought you were a walking Solid Vision hologram programmed to promote KaibaCorp."
"And I thought you were a two-dimensional fighting game character who stumbled out of your arcade machine into the real world, so that makes us even."
Marik spat his water back into his glass, his shoulders shaking. Jonouchi flipped Seto off, but there was something oddly good-natured about it, that even Seto had to crack half a smile.
"I hate you both and I hate that you brought me out here," he said.
"Love you too, Kaiba-kun," Marik said with a roll of his eyes and an exaggerated grin.
. . .
A/N: Seto Kaiba is human? Blasphemy. Next is Bereftshipping (Mana x Set).
