Happy Chinese New Year, one and all! My baby 4K2 is gaining readership! Chuchi is so very happy! Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed/followed/favorited my fanfic. You are my inspiration! :D


新生: 少しずつ進歩

Rebirth: Progress, Bit by Bit


He was dreaming again.

Far as he could tell, he was in one of the districts in Rukongai, Hyourinmaru in hand. In front of him were some random Shinigami and a hulking monster...wait, a Menos Grande?

How did a Menos Grande get into Soul Society? His dream self didn't feel surprised at the sight, though. If anything, he was a tad irritated. He raised his sword.

"Go, Hyourinmaru!"

The ice dragon charged at the Hollow with a roar, and the monster was frozen in a block of ice. Seeing their chance to get away, the Shinigami scrambled for safety while he made quick work of slashing the giant ice cube to pieces.

"Hitsugaya-taichou, there's another one!"

Another Menos? He felt his dream self's irritation spike beyond merely tad. "How many more of these things are there?" He heard himself mutter as he dodged a strike from his left and promptly sliced the offending monster in half, only for another to take its place.

He could not turn to see where the other Shinigami are (like what he just said, he wasn't entirely in control of this dream), but he felt peeved that none of them are really doing anything against these monsters other than screaming like civilians when one was about to jump on him.

Like right now.

"Hitsugaya-taichou!"

For God's sake! He could feel that he was this close to cutting down the whiny fucker just so he can concentrate into the fight, when a beam of white light shot out of nowhere, hitting the Gillian at his side straight at its face. He watched bemusedly as the foul creature's mask cracked before disintegrating into a twisted heap.

What was that?

"Hitsugaya-taichou!" Someone was calling his name again, but unlike the previous times before, this voice was calm and levelled, lined with concern instead of fear.

He knew it was her, and it filled him with relief. Finally, somebody who could do more than just watch and whine.

With renewed strength, he jumped to the next Menos Grande as the two of them finished the others off.

Then the scene then changed.

He was standing in a tattered roof, breathing heavily, his arms, shoulder and chest stinging but manageable. His immediate vicinity was mercifully quiet.

"Taichou," She called when he turned (damn it, why was his vision of her so out focus and wobbly?)

He nodded in acknowledgment. "Was that the last of them?"

"Yes, I believe so."

"And the survivors?"

"All accounted for. Oh," She gestured at this shoulder. "You're hurt!"

He shrugged. "Just a graze. I'll be fine."

But his companion did not listen. "Doesn't matter, taichou. Let me heal you!"

His eyebrow twitched and he moved out of the way of the healing kido. "We don't have time for this. If the survivors want to follow us, fine, but we're—GAH!"

Again, his companion did not listen, and had the audacity to drag him back down. In his surprise, he was unable to stop himself from an undignified landing to a seated position.

"What the hell?!" He snapped angrily at her defiance and his embarrassment over his graceless fall. Girl or not, he was going to rip this disrespectful Shinigami a new one for—

He then felt the warm pulse of green, regenerative energy over his wound.

"Really, rushing into things like that won't get us anywhere." The girl stated evenly. "We've been travelling for half the day non-stop then ran into a horde of Arrancar. I think we deserve the break."

"You're not the Captain here!"

"Well, it's the lieutenant's job to rein the Captain when he's being too stubborn for their own good. For an ice zanpakuto wielder, you're very hot headed!"

He murmured something in a warning tone.

"Sorry, Hitsugaya-taichou. Feel free to berate me all you want for my undermining your authority later, but please let me finish healing you first. You'll have more energy to do that once I'm done."

He can't deny that her healing was making him feel better already. Was she a member of the 4th Division? Her healing kido was good enough to be. He wondered if she had gone and healed the others before…

"Don't worry about the rest, Hitsugaya-taichou. None of them are severely injured. They're resting in one of the houses nearby. I'll take you to them once we're done."

They remained quiet while his companion continued to heal him. The energy coming from her was warm (why is that surprising?) and invigorating, but at the same time, it filled him with a sense of calm that cooled his temper and left him thinking clearer than he had been moments before.

OK, so maybe a break wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"...Thank you."

The female Lieutenant paused before answering, and he could almost imagine her smiling. "You're welcome, taichou."

Long after the dream ended, Hitsugaya would remain wondering why mystery fukutaichou smiling at him made his dream self's heart skip a few beats.


Rukia could not tell whether her nerves were due to anxiety or excitement.

Starting today, Rukia will be scheduled to have training everyday with the 10th Division Captain every four in the afternoon, six days a week, in a clearing near Hakumoton. Byakuya was already informed of the arrangement so that she will be excused for coming home late, and agreed to it on the condition that the afternoon training will not be a valid excuse for Rukia to slack off her morning sessions with Byakuya.

(Heaven forbid that Rukia will intentionally do anything to disappoint her Nii-sama!)

Hitsugaya himself had been as cool as ever regarding the whole thing. "Orders are orders. But consider yourself warned, Kuchiki, I'm a strict trainer. I expect nothing less than your best out of this. If you think you're up for that, then I don't see why we'll have a problem."

Most of the day came by quickly, and after a meager snack of dumplings, Rukia made her way to the meeting place, lake Hibana. Hitsugaya said she could ask Jidanbo for further directions, but she already knew how to get there, since she and Toushirou passed by it on the way to Seireitei. It was a wide, pristine blue body of water surrounded by sprawling green conifers and smooth stones that shone almost like silver.

How nostalgic… Rukia remembered the time the first time she had been to this lake had been alive with fireflies. It was one of the few memories she had during the Quincy war when she allowed herself to be young again for a while and chase after the fireflies, dragging Toushirou with her. The "I'm much too damn mature for that kind of shit" Toushirou ended up pushing her into the lake, which he claimed was an accident, so naturally, Rukia waged water war.

(She won that war, by the way, even if Toushirou thought otherwise.)

While in hindsight, not one of the wisest things she had done (it took hours for her shikakusho to dry up; thank God Toushirou had the foresight to remove his trench coat before it became too soaked), seeing her friend relaxed and happy, if not a bit too smug, had been worth it. He didn't even scold her for it, and Rukia considered the conversation that followed afterwards was a double win.

"Ne, Hitsugaya-taichou, don't you think it's hard to be a firefly, having a butt that lights up every time it gets dark?"

"...You did not just ask me that question, Kuchiki."

"But think of how warm it can get! And how embarrassing it must be to have a glow in the dark butt!"

"You have the strangest perspective of the world sometimes. Where do you even get all these stupid ideas?"

"Just because it doesn't make sense to you doesn't mean it's stupid!"

He just shook his head and made an exasperated noise, making her fling some grass to his face (which may or may not have ended into a grass throwing war). Still, it was one of the most enjoyable moments Rukia had had during that dark time.

But the day after that, they found Rangiku-san and Hinamori-san…


"You're early."

Rukia turned around and bowed at the arriving Captain. "Good afternoon, Hitsugaya-taichou."

The white-haired boy raised a brow questioningly at her, making Rukia blink. "Is something wrong?" Blink again. "Wait, did you expect me to be late?"

Hitsugaya coughed something that sounded like "getting too damn used to Matsumoto's shit", making Rukia fight down a laugh. "That's not important. I suppose you're wondering why I chose to meet at this place?"

Rukia recalled the conversation she had with Toushirou and hazarded a guess. "Because of the water?"

"Ah. For some reason, the water in this lake is more sensitive to temperature changes than most." Hitsugaya drew his sword and let it hover above the water. The blade did not have to glow blue for the water below it to form a snowflake on the surface. "When it is exposed to enough cold, it begins to form ice on the surface shaped similar to a snowflake, hence its name."

Toushirou from her past already showed her this, but seeing it actually happen was so fascinating Rukia did not have to fake her astonishment. "It's beautiful."

"For an ice-based zanpakuto, this is a good place to train in regulating your reiatsu, if you can stay in the lake's vicinity without causing it to freeze. But we'll get to that some other time." The next thing Rukia knew, Hitsugaya shunpoed to the middle of the water.

"Taichou?"

"Draw your zanpakuto, Kuchiki." Hitsugaya pointed Hyourinmaru at her. "Let me see what you can do."

A mid-air spar? She supposed she could do that. Rukia obligingly drew her own sword. "Yes, sir."

With a burst of speed, Rukia shunpoed straight at the captain who met her strike with his blade. As soon as the metals connected, a cold wind billowed outwards from where they stood. From her periphery, she could already see a formation of ice flowers on the lake surface.

The little Kuchiki huffed at the flakes. "That happened quickly."

"Quite." Hitsugaya said mildly as he pushed her sword off followed by a sideway strike.

She pushed the strike back to the right before doing three more alternating sweeps, all of which Hitsugaya blocked while the pair circled each other. The wind picked up in speed and coldness as the two continued to trade blows, but so far, neither have yet to land a hit.

He's fast. Rukia noted. Even if he's holding back, and I know he is, his speed is incredible, as is his technique! His control over his reiatsu is just as good too, as expected from the Gotei 13's prodigy. It's enviable that he's already this strong at this age when I can't even get 200 swings in when I'm only a few years older.

Hitsugaya maneuvered away from Rukia's last right side strike, and upon seeing his sword coming in for a hit, Rukia moved to parry with her sword. But then…

"You're letting your emotions take over. That's a sure way to death, not victory."

"I don't care if this kills me! If I am meant to lose everything to this war, at the very least let me have the honor of avenging him!"

What the—? Rukia barely managed to avoid Hitsugaya's attack when a sudden memory decided to pop in at the same time. Shit, now is not the time for this! I have to concentrate!

But when she tightened her hold of her sword then jumping to bring her sword down of Hitsugaya's head

"Ah, no, I—I'm sorry! I did not mean to sound so forward! I'm sorry for speaking out of turn, Hitsugaya-taichou, I—"

"Friends, huh? I haven't…I haven't been anyone's friend in a long time."

No! Rukia nearly lost her footing when Hitsugaya pushed her back and struck her again.

"What do you think you're doing, Kuchiki?" The silver haired captain said impatiently, obviously noticing her distractedness.

"I still can keep going!" Rukia held her blade steady and went for another hit. What was wrong with her? Here was Hitsugaya trying to help her, let she was allowing herself to lose focus?

Parry. Jump to the right. Slash. She went through the motions as she furiously tried to keep her head void of nothing but the spar. But her brain just won't work with her.

"At least, since I'm probably as good as dead…"

"You won't die, Toushirou-taichou! Don't even think that! I won't let it happen!"

Come on, Kuchiki! Rukia growled. You won't let any of those bad memories happen again so stop dwelling on them! Don't waste Hitsugaya-taichou's time by being an incompetent student!

Roll to the left. Slash. Slash. Parry. She winced when a quick attack from Hitsugaya nearly landed. Slash. Parry. Parry. Jump back. Strike—

"...Stay with me?"

"Don't I always?"

"AH!" Rukia cried out when the blunt side of her opponent's blade hit the side of her head pulled her out of her flashback, but somehow managed to ground her foot to prevent herself from falling to the water.

She bit back her wince when she felt the struck area, already noting of the knot forming beneath her fingertips. Even if it was just the blunt side, it still hurt! "I'm so sorry, Hitsugaya-taichou! I—"

"Enough." He cut in easily, already in the middle of resheathing his blade. "I've seen everything I had to."

"But…" Rukia cursed in her head when the look in Hitsugaya's eyes brooked for no argument. She can only hope that he's not too disappointed with the resulting spar. She already was.


After going back to the water's edge, Rukia took a seat near the frozen lake, applying healing kido on her head bump, while Hitsugaya stated his evaluation.

"For a Shinigami out of commission for a while, you did all right."

Rukia blinked in disbelief. "R-Really?"

"But you could do better. Your focus for one is lacking." Hitsugaya said flatly, making the girl's cheeks color guiltily. "There's also something about your reiatsu."

"Nii-sama told me once that it appears to have increased. That's why I was having a hard time doing my kido spells before."

The captain shrugged. "He would know more about that, I expect. What I noticed is that your reiatsu is already in tune with your zanpakuto, enough to channel your element." He gestured at the lake. "Most of that was because of you."

Rukia stared at all that ice. While she did feel the cold wind, she did not expect that most of it came from just her. "I...guess I'm still not in as much control as I thought?"

Hitsugaya's grunt might as well have said 'obviously.' "Your reiatsu would spike the most during those times when I would catch you distracted during the spar."

There was an unspoken question there, one that Rukia wasn't sure she could answer honestly. Telling Ukitake and Kyoraku was one thing, but telling Hitsugaya, who was at the crux of her influx of memories at the moment, who had his own emotional burdens to deal with…

"You don't have to tell me."

Rukia looked up at him. "Eh?"

"If it's something too personal, you don't have to tell me." Hitsugaya repeated. "But I expect you to deal with it. If it is what's causing your instability and your inability to draw your shikai, you won't be getting anywhere if you don't fix it."

She let out a breath. "Y-Yes, sir. I will."

"Since Kuchiki-taichou is also overseeing your training in the basics, and since the purpose of me mentoring you is to help you get your shikai back, I will focus on your elemental reiatsu."

He drew his zanpakuto once more and raised it in the air. Rukia watched in fascination as the sword glowed blue with power. Parts of the lake then begun to glow in the same deep blue as Hyourinmaru, and as the deep blue from the lake were drawn into its blade, Rukia noted that some of the ice begun to thin.

"Hibana is sensitive to temperature changes, but that's not all that makes it special." Toushirou told her with his hand still hovering above water he just froze. "If the water is frozen because of my reiatsu, it stores that energy until the ice melts. And if I draw it all that reiatsu back," The frozen lake glowed blue. "The water thaws almost immediately, like so."

"Amazing!" Rukia's eyes sparkled after Toushirou succeeded unfreezing the lake. "It's like the lake was made to train ice-elemental zanpakuto users!"

"For all we know, perhaps it was."

"—you can start by focusing on your reiatsu in the water and drawing it back to your zanpakuto. Just concentrate on the trace of your reiatsu in the water and focus on drawing it to you." Rukia returned to the conversation to hear the other ice zanpakuto wielder's instructions. "It's a practice of the first step towards your shikai, so it's something you should be able to do."

"Right." Rukia nodded, drawing her sword while eyeing the lake in trepidation. "How much of the water should I work on?"

At Hitsugaya's deadpan look, Rukia gawked in realization. "You can't mean all of it!"

The captain did not miss a beat. "And once you're done with that, you're going to freeze the water and start all over again."

/Keep going, Rukia-sama!/ Sode no Shirayuki said cheerfully. /I know you can do it!/

Rukia worked hard to suppress a whine. Hitsugaya did warn her that he was a strict taskmaster.


"Yo, Rukia! Long time no see!"

"Shut up, Renji." Rukia snapped half-heartedly, still a bit groggy after days of intense work.

Renji raised a brow at her narrowed eyes and hard scowl and smirked. "Taichou and Hitsugaya-taichou driving you to the wall?"

"They must have forgotten at some point that I'm nowhere near their level." Rukia mumbled. "Sometimes I wish I could stay dead to the world for a little longer."

With the addition of training under Hitsugaya to her schedule, Rukia found herself working doubly hard to meet the high standards of two perfectionist captains. While training with Hitsugaya focused on improving Rukia's control and use of her reiatsu, Byakuya worked on her physical and sword fighting skills.

Hitsugaya would make her freeze then thaw lake Hibana over and over. Byakuya would make her perform her swings with a light book on her head (for balance, supposedly) and restarting at zero if it fell off at any point during practice. Hitsugaya made her shunpo laps around the lake, and if she made any area freeze during her run, she'd have to thaw that spot and do the laps all over again. Byakuya would make her spar with him non-stop until she either landed a good hit on him or was able to block and/or dodge twenty strikes from him.

Basically, despite her short time under them (three hours at most), Rukia found herself being pushed to her physical and mental limits she had never been to at this age in the past. But despite her tiredness, Rukia also relished in the feeling of all of it.

It was after several days of training that she started to see a difference. Her reflexes were getting a bit better, her agility had also improved and her body was getting used to the faster and stronger motions she applied in her katas. Her control over her reiatsu was improving as well, to the point that at least she no longer froze the entire Hibana lake just by sparring with Hitsugaya. And bit by bit, her zanpakuto was releasing the suppressed reiatsu back into Rukia's system while the Shinigami begun to practice actively hiding her growing energy level.

Once all of her reiatsu has been returned to her, Sode no Shirayuki estimated that Rukia would be at around high Lieutenant to low Captain level, which will certainly rear suspicious heads, or at best, unwanted attention, her way.

Great, I'll be having the same problem as Zaraki-taichou. Rukia huffed at the thought, especially since comparing herself to the raw powerhouse that is the 11th Division Captain was a huge stretch. Still, if her reiatsu level does reach the point when it will become problematic to keep a low profile, she might have to look into carrying a hidden limiter or something like that (if she could only figure out where she could get one discreetly).

She didn't want the enemies to think she is an Ichigo the Second.

But for all her improvements, she was still unable to get her shikai back. It was really, really starting to get to her, and her frustration was really showing.

"So really, what's getting you?"

"My shikai, or the lack thereof." She answered shortly. "You would think having two people training me, I would have made progress on that by now!"

"Hey, don't take it too hard! We can see you're getting better!" Renji said encouragingly, taking the seat in front of her. They were back in the ramen restaurant, waiting for their bowls of hot, noodle-y goodness after a short spar. "You're able to strike harder and faster now! Well, your strikes still lack some punch, but I can hardly hit you!"

"You're just trying to make me feel better."

"No, really! You're getting stronger, Rukia! I'm sure you'll get your shikai back in no time!"

But Rukia just sighed. "It's not because I can't, Renji. It's...how do I explain it?"

Renji's face turned serious. "Explain what?"

The petite Shinigami chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully. "It's like when I try to use my shikai, I get these memories, flashbacks. They're of a time when I was...scared and upset. Stupid, isn't it? It's all in the past, yet every time I see them, it feels as if they just happened. Every time I see too much of them, I…"

A waiter came by their table with two bowls of steaming ramen and a cup each of tea. The two friends paused for a bite or two before Renji spoke.

"So you're stressed out." Renji surmised. "By the memories of what happened in Soukyoku Hill?"

"...I guess." It's not like I can tell him the truth, anyway.

"It's not a big deal, Rukia. I mean," The red head scratched through his hair. "You're not the only one who's gone through that and unable to fight as an active shinigami because they're traumatized out of summoning their zanpakuto."

Rukia glared. "I'm not –"

"Yes, you are." Renji said firmly. "And again, it's not a big deal! Some Shinigami just up and quit when faced with that, but you're still fighting! You're not giving up on yourself! You just have to find a way to deal with those memories and how they affect you."

"...That's pretty smart of you, Renji."

The bigger man pretended to look affronted. "Hey, I can think of something good too, you know! And honestly, it took me a while to get Zabimaru's shikai. I mean a really long while, when just about everyone's already gotten theirs."


Rukia's head perked up in surprise. Renji never spoke of this before.

Said red head took a long, slow sip of his tea. "At first, I thought it was just a matter of me not being strong enough, so I slaved off everyday training. I worked my ass off in sword fighting to the point that I could beat almost all the students in the Academy. But without my shikai, eh, I guess you can tell how frustrating it was, can't you?"

The black-haired girl nodded quietly, fully able to relate.

"But over time I came to realize that what I was doing wasn't making me stronger. It was just...I was being distracted. I wasn't being true to myself and what I really wanted. I was hiding from the fact that deep down, I still felt that I was a weak and stupid student who wouldn't amount to anything." The other teen coughed. "I didn't want to admit to myself that I felt so inferior to Taichou, and that I hated myself for letting them take you away without a fight."

"Renji…"

The red head smiled reassuringly at her. "Hey, it's fine, seriously. I'm over it. I got my shikai and bankai, after all."

Rukia searched his eyes for anything that told her otherwise, and was relieved fo find none. "So how did you manage to get your shikai?"

"Zabimaru helped, as well as Kira and Momo. Those two got their shikais already, but they made this stupid promise to not graduate until I got mine. I tied to say that it's not up to them, but the idiots wouldn't listen." Renji smiled wistfully. "Sometimes we'd spar, other times we'd talk. Momo helped me focus enough to meditate and connect with Zabimaru. Gradually, I understood the problem, and when I faced it head on, when I gave myself the goal of overcoming taichou, I was finally able to reach Zabimaru and release his shikai."

"Wow."

"So that's my point," Renji coughed again, trying and failing to hide the light red on his cheeks. "It worked for me to face my negativities and all that crap head on. It certainly made Zabimaru respect me a bit more. I'm not sure it's any to you right now but…"

"Don't be stupid, Renji. Of course it is." Rukia smiled comfortingly with a squeeze on his arm. "It means a lot that you shared that story with me. Thanks."

The smile he gave her was reminiscent of the fonder days they shared in Rukongai. "I just hope it helps you, Rukia."

"Me too. At least my training with Nii-sama is showing results." Rukia sighed. "I wouldn't want Hitsugaya-taichou think that he's wasting his time with me."

Renji stared at her a bit before flicking her forehead.

"OW! RENJI! What was that for?!"

From her inner world, Sode no Shirayuki nodded in approval.

"Because you're selling yourself short again, idiot!" Her friend remarked. "I just told you you're doing better! You just need to be more patient with yourself. And look at it this way, if he thinks he is wasting time on you, do you really think Hitsugaya-taichou would keep coming back to train you?"

Rukia's eyebrows scrunched up before she supplied. "That's because, and I quote 'I have my orders'."

/Must you be so pessimistic, hime?/

It's called being a realist, Shirayuki.

"And do you really think that Hitsugaya-taichou will follow orders from a captain other than the Soutaichou just because he was told to?" Renji countered.

The snow spirit sounded just as smug. /My point exactly!/

Rukia sighed tiredly at the two ganging up on her. "Yes? No? I don't know! But the fact remains that, he's putting a lot effort in me, Renji. I just don't want to end up letting him down."

"You won't, Rukia. I'm sure of it." Renji said while placing a consoling hand on her shoulder. "And who knows? Maybe Hitsugaya-taichou is still training you is because he thinks so too."

It wasn't exactly a logical thought, but it was enough to make Rukia smile.


I need to acknowledge those painful memories, and the fact that they scare me.

Rukia mused as she instinctively blocked Hitsugaya's sword from the left. The two were sparring over the lake again, their cold reiatsu making the lake freeze in some places though thankfully not as widespread as before.

Even Sode no Shirayuki told me that I have to face them, and deep down, I know I should. But… Rukia rolled out of Hyourinmaru's way and stepped in for a strike. Hitsugaya easily blocked her strike and another volley of slashes came anew.

But Renji's problem feels like it's only part of my own. These memories...they don't just make me feel guilty and angry at myself. I know what those memories can do to me, and it scares me what it could do if I let myself become overwhelmed.

Rukia tightened her hold on her sword. But I can't give up! I won't!

Her blade struck Hitsugaya's, enveloping them both in a burst of cold wind. The white haired captain jumped back with a mild look of approval. "Your strikes are getting stronger."

"Thank you." Rukia paused before looking at the ground. "But I still have yet to achieve my shikai."

Green eyes regarded her questioningly. "You are aware of the problem?"

"Somewhat. I mean, I am aware that there is a problem, but…"

"You don't know how to deal with it."

"Renji says it helped when he faced his fears head on, as if he was fighting with them." For some reason, Rukia just went on. "He's always been very brave and headstrong. I can see him being able to do that. But when I think of doing the same, a part of me thinks that it wouldn't work for me."

And for some reason, Hitsugaya was entertaining her rambling. "And what do you think will work for you?"

She hesitated, torn between wanting to tell him and just forgetting about it. But then, there's always been something about Hitsugaya that made her feel that he could understand her, that he could listen to whatever she had to say without judgment and even empathize with her.

/You do not have to tell him everything./ Sode no Shirayuki reminded her gently. /And you know you can trust him. He has proven himself in the first life, has he not?/

Hitsugaya let out a breath at her silence. "I know it's probably a personal matter for you, but—"


"Why did you agree to train me?"

It had always been at the back of her mind since they started this arrangement, and after her talk with Renji, it kept ringing at the back of her mind that she just couldn't ignore it.

Hitsugaya frowned slightly at the query. "As I told you before, I had my orders."

"Yes, but why?" Rukia pressed. "Not that I'm grateful, taichou, because I really, really am. But I'm not from your Division, we hardly know each other, and you must have other Shinigami better than me who want to be trained by you. You don't have any real reason to spend this much time with me—"

"You're a Shinigami under the Gotei 13. As captain, it is my responsibility to help other Shinigami, whether they are under my Division or not. You and I have compatible zanpakuto so it's reasonable that I assist you in mastering it." Hitsugaya shrugged. "And does it look like I really need a reason to?"

"But you're the kind of person who never does anything without one!" Rukia's eyes then widened at what she just said and at Hitsugaya's raised brows. "I—I mean, I'm so sorry, that was very improper. I mean, presumptuous, improper and presumptuous—!"

"...I may have another reason." The captain cut in smoothly. "You're awfully curious about this, Kuchiki."

Rukia's face flushed. "Ah, that's because…"

"I'll make you a deal, then." Hitsugaya proceeded to say. "Tell me what's really keeping you from activating your shikai; then once you get your shikai back, I'll answer your question."

"Wait, what?"

"Take it however you will, but mind you, you did just ask a personal question to your superior officer."

Rukia gaped at him in disbelief. "Now wait just a minute—!"

"All that aside, I am here to help you to get your shikai back." The green-eyed captain added. "I thought of respecting your personal boundaries, but then how am I supposed to help you if I don't know how to? How can I prove that I can be an effective captain for my Division if I can't mentor a Shinigami who has already achieved shikai in the past?"

"Hitsugaya-taichou…" Rukia whispered, seeing emotion in the captain's green eyes for the first time since she met him in this timeline. She felt kicking herself for questioning him in the first place: hadn't he proven in the previous life that despite his cold front, he always tried to help? That behind the aloof mask was a kind heart?

"...I get flashbacks whenever I try to summon my release."

Hitsugaya looked at her sharply at that. Rukia swallowed before continuing. "I could see her shikai form, I could feel her coming to me. But every time I would reach out, the...bad memories I have would flash before my eyes and I just get so...overwhelmed by them that…I sort of clam up. I lose my focus."

Rukia clutched her sword with both hands. "Even when I'm not thinking of them, they just come out of nowhere. No matter how hard I try to suppress the images, they just keep coming back. They just keep hurting. They just keep freezing me. They keep me from Sode no Shirayuki and even if it worked for Renji to face the negativity head on, somehow I just know that I can't charge in like it's some kind of fight. But I don't know what else to do and it's weak, it's pathetic, it's unbecoming of a Shinigami and I'm sorry—"

"Stop."

"E-Eh?"

Hitsugaya shook his head. "Don't apologize. Everything that's happened is hardly your fault. Out of all of us, you got the worst out of being the victim of the circumstances. And yet you're trying to be functional Shinigami again despite all that, so that's saying something.

"There's nothing to be ashamed about what you're going through. Most of us go through something like that at least once in our lives, and everyone has different ways of dealing with it. There's nothing wrong with Abarai's approach not fitting you either. Your personalities and your zanpakuto are too different, so it's no surprise."

Rukia nodded slowly. "I...see."

The other ice wielder paused in thought for a minute before she heard him mumble. "Can't see why we can't give it a try."

"Taichou?"

"It's getting late, Kuchiki. You should be heading back."

Rukia looked at the sky. By her estimate, it was only early evening.

"I have something I need to do," Hitsugaya added before she could open her mouth to ask. "It cannot wait, so we need to end today's session right here."

"Right, of course." Rukia agreed before following the captain back to the lake edge, feeling rather disappointed. She had hoped Hitsugaya had some solution, or at least, ideas to share before they had to leave.

"Don't worry about it." Her frustration must have showed (she really needs to work on being so damn readable!), because Hitsugaya turned to her with a knowing look. "I might have an idea that could help you out. There are just some things I need to take care of first."

"Ah, yes, sir." Rukia bowed. "Thank you very much for your time."

Hitsugaya shook his head. "Don't go thanking me yet. You still haven't gotten your shikai back."

"I will, Hitsugaya-taichou. I promise I will not disappoint you." The girl flashed a determined smile, suddenly feeling very brave. "And I hope you won't forget about our deal."

Her words made something flicker in Hitsugaya's green eyes too quickly for Rukia to catch. Instead, Hitsugaya inclined his head, the beginnings of a smirk across his lips. "Same time tomorrow, Kuchiki."

"Yes, sir."

"And make sure the lake is frost free before you leave. I'll know if you don't."

Another vein popped in Rukia's forehead.

"...SERIOUSLY?!"


Some RenRuki bonding and the beginnings of HitsuRuki friendship written in!

The hashing and rehashing I've done for this fanfic can be a fanfic on its own right. Finally, I'm happy with how this turned out!

A few more chapters left before we jump to the next arc, which will be this story's take on the Bount filler. Which mean we're close to seeing the Ichigo and the gang again! I don't think I'll be featuring all the filler arcs and the movies in this fanfic. So far, the ones I plan to include are the Bount invasion, the Zanpakuto Unknown Tales, and the Diamond Dust Rebellion movie. I am still partial to the Sword Beasts and the Reigai uprising arcs, and the Fade to Black movie. We'll see.

Feedback and suggestions are highly appreciated! Thanks again for reading and making it this far! Cheerio!


HEADCANONS BOARD:

- Lake Hibana (氷花湖 Lit. Ice Flower Lake) is a reiatsu-sensitive place of its own kind. One we'll be seeing more of in the future. I imagined it to be something like lake Mashu (摩周湖) in Hokkaido.

- Rukia and Renji are bros. I don't care what Kubo-sensei's canon says. XD


OMAKE:

"SHIRO-TAICHOU!" Ukitake greeted his fellow white-haired captain entering his Division office that afternoon.

"It's Hitsugaya-taichou!" Hitsugaya snapped irritably, and as usual Ukitake ignored him.

"Thank you for coming on such short notice. I know how busy you must be with your Division but I wish to see this matter resolved as soon as possible."

"Just spit it out already so I can get back to work." Hitsugaya said as if nonchalant even though both knew better. Despite the fact that the 13th Division captain's doting on Hitsugaya tended to grate on the latter's nerves, the younger Captain had yet to refuse the other anything, including a cryptic Hell Butterfly summon to Ukitake's office at Hitsugaya's earliest convenience.

"I'll cut right to it, then." Ukitake said after the other captain took a seat across him. "I need your help with one of my subordinates."

Hitsugaya raised a brow at that. It was unusual for another Division to ask help from another on matters regarding their own. And until otherwise ordered by the Captain Commander, most Divisions preferred (and even enforced) that their business remained within the walls of their compound—a practice even someone as kind and sociable as Ukitake usually observed.

"There's nothing wrong, if that's what you're thinking." Ukitake hurriedly reassured him. "Although technically there is. My subordinate has been having a hard time wielding her zanpakuto after what happened at Soukyoku Hill and I can see that she will need some help. I would have been glad to do so, but I am currently, uh, indisposed at the moment. So I was hoping you can?"

It didn't take a lot of guesswork to figure Ukitake out. "You want me to train Kuchiki."

"Ah, you're quick! You really are a genius, aren't you?"

"Considering that she's one of the few female Shinigami in your Division, and the only one you have who is an ice zanpakuto wielder like me, it's not difficult to come to that conclusion." The little captain said. "What I'm trying to understand is that why you think I'm the best captain to ask. Any captain would be able to train her to get her shikai back even without the elemental compatibility."

Ukitake smiled. "I was honestly hoping that you would take her for far longer than that."

"…Why?"

"Rukia is one of the best Shinigami I've ever had. She's sharp, brave and an efficient fighter." Ukitake went on. "She's always looking for ways to get stronger, even before all this happened. And while she has always been so polite, she is also spirited. She is a joy to teach. I would myself, but I'm still a little worse for wear.

"But aside from me, no one else in our Division will be enough to challenge Rukia enough to grow. And among the other captains, you're the one I could think of that is near her age group who can push help her do just that. Not to mention having the same elemental zanpakuto means there is much that she can only learn from you."

"If we are able to tolerate each other." Hitsugaya knew very well that his infamous temper and aloofness tended to isolate him from most. While he was on relatively civil terms with the 10th Division, he would not go far as to say that he had a close relationship with them as Ukitake did with his own. Other than Matsumoto, everyone in his barracks appeared to be either intimidated or in awe of him.

He offhandedly wondered how long it would take before his so-called ice prince persona (Matsumoto's words, not his) will inevitably drive Kuchiki away as well.

"That's the other point: I have reasons to believe that you two will get along splendidly! Oh, don't look at me like that, Hitsugaya-taichou! I'm serious!" Ukitake said at Hitsugaya's disbelieving glare.

"Word around is that Kuchiki-taichou is already training her."

"Not that I'm questioning Byakuya's competence, but there are certain things that he may not be help her through with. The same elemental zanpakuto is a nice touch, but I was thinking of something more personal."

Hitsugaya had to admit, that made him a little bit curious. "And you think I can help her with that?"

"I believe you can." Ukitake answered. "You have a lot more in common with her than you believe."

The younger captain bristled at the thought that Ukitake could know much about his past to make that assumption. "What do you mean by that?"

"If you have been captain for as long as I have, you hear things." The man assured him. "Anyhow, I won't pressure you into making the decision now. Despite the valid points I made, taking Rukia in for training is up to you. Though I do hope you'll agree, and that you'll send word of your answer within a day or two." Ukitake smiled. "Something tells me you'll benefit from this experience as much as she will."

As much as Hitsugaya begrudgingly respected Ukitake, he had a half mind to turn the request down. He already had a Division to take care of (including working overtime to compensate for his lazy Lieutenant), and he had his own personal problems to deal with. He really did not need the concerns of another, someone he barely knew, added on top of that.

But then he mulled over it for the rest of the night, with Hyourinmaru adding his input every now and then, because while he had no real reason to be interested in helping her, Hitsugaya also did not have a reason not to.

Hyourinmaru said it best. /You always do the right thing, Master. Even if it is not one of your own, would you really ignore someone you know you can help?/

Also, admittedly, he was still curious as to what Ukitake meant that he and Kuchiki had more in common than he knew. And he still remembered the strange way the girl reacted when she saw him back at the 4th Division hallway.

(Hitsugaya Toushirou hated things his genius mind didn't understand. But he wouldn't turn down an interesting enough puzzle if it came his way either.)

The hell butterfly bearing Hitsugaya's answer for Ukitake came the following morning. The ice wielding captain can only hope he won't come to regret it.