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新生: Break. Limit. Dance
Rebirth: Break. Limit. Dance
The bare room was freezing.
That was the first thing Kuchiki Byakuya noticed when he opened the rice paper door.
The second thing was that at the center of it, her snow-white blade plunged through the floor, brimming with frosty reiatsu, was his sister. She didn't appear to notice him, clutching her zanpakuto for support with a knee to the ground, her panting coming out as white puffs.
But when he made a move to approach her, Rukia's voice rose sharply. "Stay back!"
Byakuya halted out of surprise more than anything else. He remained tense however as he watched Rukia slowly rise to her feet, holding her zanpakuto in a ready position.
"Please forgive my rudeness, Nii-sama," The girl repeated, her tone softer now. "But I must ask that you stand back. I...I am still attempting to master Sode no Shirayuki's true shikai. I cannot risk hurting you by accident."
If Byakuya had a little less tact, he would have pointed out that the only person Rukia was really hurting was herself. He can easily see the beginnings of frostbite showing in her hands and at some parts of her face, can notice the places where the brittle skin had already cracked.
Can tell by the glazed, worn out look in her dark lavender eyes that she had nearly reached her limit. It deeply troubled Byakuya that he had allowed his sister to push herself like this without him noticing.
So when he heard the sound of a chink followed by a hissed curse, Byakuya made three decisive steps forward and held her chipped hands with both of his own.
"N-Nii-sama!" He felt the ice claw onto his skin as Rukia cried in alarm. But he did not allow himself to feel any pain. He had no right to complain about the cold that is but a fraction of what she was experiencing.
"You are going too fast." Byakuya said calmly. "Your body is within freezing range. You have to lower your body temperature slowly in order to prevent further damage. Start by drawing the cold out of your fingers, then move inwards."
"But Nii-sama, your hands!"
"Do not worry. Do not be afraid. Focus on the sound of my voice and on what I am telling you." He willed his fingers to squeeze her hands the slightest bit. "You are safe. There is nothing to fear. I am here. All is as it should be."
He kept his voice soft and slow, deliberately emphasizing over each word and willing his reiatsu to provide as much warmth as it safely could.
Eventually, Rukia's breathing evidently became even, and soon enough, the cold receded from their joined hands and her skin slowly regained its pale rose glow.
"Nii-sama, I...I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble." The girl bowed low. "I should not have let my reiatsu spiral out of control."
"You have nothing to apologize for." Byakuya said immediately. "Your zanpakuto is as difficult to master as it is beautiful. And yet you have displayed a remarkable amount of control over it in a short span of time. That in itself is a proof of your latent strength."
Rukia's eyes were wide, disbelieving yet hopeful. Byakuya realized with a pang of sadness that he never really gave her much positive reinforcement despite her remarkable achievements and the fact that he was immeasurably proud of each of them.
"Control over elemental zanpakuto has always been linked to emotions. From what I have heard, ice is strongly affected by the less volatile spectrum of negative feelings."
"My negative feelings?"
"Hate. Grief. Guilt. Fear. If you are to master your sword, you cannot let your emotions control you. They might be able to take hold of you for a time, but you must always overcome them, Rukia."
"A Kuchiki must never show weakness." Rukia recited clearly. "But I also know that I have a long way to go. There is still so much I have to learn and understand, not just about Sode no Shirayuki but also about myself. The Winter War showed me that, and I…" Rukia swallowed heavily. "I was afraid, that I would be a burden again. That because of my weakness, I will be left behind again..."
Byakuya hesitated, his eyes shifting to his side, before adding. "I know you will overcome, Rukia, despite all these things you fear. Not because you are a Lieutenant or a Kuchiki, but because you are my sister, one of the strongest souls I have ever known. And I may be able to help you in that, if you will let me."
Rukia's eyes were definitely shining now, her bottom lip trembling with such emotion that it made his chest ache. He still has so much to make up for, still a wonder to him that she would always receive his feeble words and gestures as if he had given her the world.
"And I promise you that, for as long as I am able, I will never leave you." Never again, he promised to himself. If the world will allow him to keep only one vow, then let this be it.
"Nii-sama..." He felt Rukia's hand tighten her grip on his. "Thank you."
Never again.
"You are preoccupied."
Rukia winced despite her brother's neutral tone. They had just finished her morning practice a bit earlier than usual and were taking tea together in the garden porch. Now she knew why, and she cursed herself for being obviously distracted.
"My apologies, Nii-sama." She answered, gaze drifting to her half-empty teacup. "I was just thinking about my progress in getting my shikai back. It is proving to be...more complicated than I thought it would be."
Byakuya regarded her questioningly. "You find your progress unsatisfactory?"
"Honestly, yes. But it's not because of Hitsugaya-taichou, of course! He's been patient and helpful with me, and…" Rukia paused. "He said he had something in mind that could help me better. We are due to meet later this afternoon so I might find out then."
"Hitsugaya-taichou is a capable Shinigami. I would not have approved of him training you if I thought otherwise." The Kuchiki nobleman said. "Were you able to determine the problem with your shikai?"
"That's," Rukia bit the inside of her cheek. While she had no problem admitting her weaknesses, she also had a strong instinct to stop herself from potentially disappointing her adoptive family, especially her brother. Also, she did not want Byakuya to have the wrong idea, that he was part of the reason of her current predicament. It took the older man the rest of their time together after Sokyoku Hill to come to believe that she had forgiven him for his part in her near execution.
But before she could choose the right words, Byakuya spoke again. "You believe you can overcome this suppression."
The younger Kuchiki's back straightened. "I will, Nii-sama. Whatever the cause may be, I will everything I can to overcome this and make you—I mean, the Kuchiki family proud."
Dark eyes gazed searchingly into hers, and in that moment, Rukia forgot to breathe. She did not know what he was looking for, nor did she know if she wanted him to find it.
It was after what felt like an eternity that Byakuya inclined his head and rose from his seat. "I have an important event I must see to tomorrow so I will not be able to meet you in the morning. Use it as your time to recuperate. We will resume on Monday morning."
Rukia nodded. She was informed about the clan meeting her brother had to attend beforehand. "Yes, Nii-sama."
"Sode no Shirayuki is said to be the most beautiful among all the zanpakuto." Byakuya added. "I trust I will be reminded of that fact on our next session."
Rukia's eyes widened. It was not stated as a question.
He believed in her! Byakuya actually believed in her! "Y-Yes!" The girl fought to keep down the emotions on the brink of bubbling out of her chest. "I'll do my best, Nii-sama! I promise I won't let you down!"
Byakuya's eyes were on hers again, and she could have sworn they softened the slightest bit. "I know."
That afternoon, with the sun lazily descending across lake Hibana, Rukia stood in attention when she felt the familiar cold reiatsu of her mentor.
"Good afternoon, Hitsugaya-taichou." She bowed in greeting when the silver haired captain approached, punctual as always, but there was something different. Something in her gut told her that this was not going to be an ordinary training session, and not just because of what Hitsugaya told her yesterday.
"We're about to start. Are you ready?" To most people, the flat, serious look on the captain's face as he reached for his weapon was just Hitsugaya being all business and wanting to have the whole thing over with. But for Rukia, who could tell that this expression was too blank, too controlled, it was further proof.
Something's...changed. Rukia thought, and it irked her that she couldn't put a finger on what. Did anything happen to him yesterday? Was it about what he said he had to take care of?
She followed the captain to the center of the lake, keeping a respectful distance as she continued to observe him for any other change. If the stoic captain knew he was being watched, he showed no sign of it.
"Today, we'll only be concentrating on sparring, because this time I will be doing something different." Hitsugaya said. "Today, I'll be sparring with you using Hyourinmaru's shikai."
Rukia's eyes widened. "Wh—what?" He wants her to spar against Hyourinmaru's initial release? When she has yet to get back her own?
"There are times in battle when you will be put in a disadvantage against you opponent. But an unlevelled playing field does not immediately mean defeat." Hitsugaya drew his zanpakuto from its sheath. "You are free to use whatever other techniques you have at your disposal. But we will only stop sparring once you land a considerable hit on me."
Fighting her with his shikai and using one of Nii-sama's conditions during a spar? Rukia mentally groaned. What did I do to make Hitsugaya-taichou so angry, and I didn't know about it? "You said any techniques, right? Does that mean I can use my kido in this match?"
"Whatever you think will work, because I won't be holding back." Hitsugaya said so sternly it made Rukia gulp nervously. He can't be serious, can he? He's a captain, and I'm an unseated Shinigami at this point! He can't expect me to be a match to him once he goes all out!
/I honestly cannot tell, Rukia-sama. I can only wish you all the best. So good luck!/
...That's all you have to say?!
Hitsugaya raised his sword to the sky. "Soten ni zase, Hyourinmaru!"
The huge blue ice dragon roared to life around the same time Rukia drew her zanpakuto with a shiver.
/Go for it, Rukia-sama!/ Sode no Shirayuki was back with her snowy pompoms. /I know you can do it!/
Rukia gripped her sword and steeled herself. Here goes nothing...
Now Rukia was positive she must have done something to piss the 10th Division captain off so damn royally.
So far in the spar, she remained on the defensive, minding the incoming strikes from both Hitsugaya and Hyourinmaru while using cleverly timed hados and bakudos to detain her partner long enough for her to attempt a good hit. As predicted, none of her hits ever really connected.
She hissed in frustration when another right slash was blocked by the ice dragon zanpakuto's body, barely having enough time to brace herself for Hitsugaya's sudden downward strike. She supposed she should be thankful that so far Hitsugaya stuck with only his sword. While not a kido master even in their previous life, Hitsugaya was no slouch in it and could easily give her a run for her money.
Rukia jumped away before quickly raising her hand. "Hado #31: Shakkaho!"
Hitsugaya's eyes narrowed a fraction before doding the spell with a jump to the left, something Rukia immediately aimed for. "Bakudo #4: Hainawa!"
The yellow rope of energy sped towards its target, but before it could hit, Hyourinmaru intercepted the attack before making a dive for Rukia. The girl barely managed to shunpo out of the way before an explosion of ice formed from where she stood.
"Is that all you've got, Kuchiki?" Hitsugaya drawled tauntingly. "I was expecting more from someone being trained by two captains."
Rukia gritted her teeth as she tightened her grip on her sword.
I wouldn't be having this much trouble if I had Sode no Shirayuki back! She wanted to snap. Instead, she had to roll out of the ice dragon charging at her and prepare for another spell. "Hado #4: Byakurai!"
She aimed the chained lightning at Hitsugaya's direction. Not surprisingly, he was quick to counter her. "Bakudo # 81: Danku!"
Rukia's eyes widened. Oh shit, now he's using kido too?! I'm done for!
The barrier flickered to life, blocking the lightning bolts easily, but the captain was not done yet. "Hado #31: Shakkaho!"
The spellcasting happened in such rapid succession that Rukia was too late in dodging the red cannon fire. The girl was able to avoid most of the blast, but was unable stop part of her sleeve from burning. But before she could assess the damage, Hyourinmaru was once again in front of her, and all Rukia could do was raise her sword to block the dragon's strike before it sent her flying in the air.
/Rukia-sama!/ Sode no Shirayuki cried out in alarm. The Shinigami let out a gasp, barely able to ground her foot midair by shunpo to avoid falling face flat on the now frozen lake.
This is bad. Rukia thought with a curse. I can hardly try to get a hit on him, let alone land a decent one. And as always, he's able to read at least two steps of me, and he's faster too. Not to mention he actually has his shikai! How do I even begin to even the odds? How will this help me get to my initial release?
"How long are you planning to just stand there?" Hitsugaya pointed his blade at her. "Stand up. I thought you said you wanted to get your shikai back?"
Rukia gritted her teeth, hoisting herself up with her blade before lunging at him with a battle cry. But when she was about to make another strong slash to the left…
"It's OK to cry, taichou. It's OK to say goodbye. Take it from me, it really helps."
"Kuchiki…"
"I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."
Fuck almighty! Rukia was distracted long enough for Hitsugaya to slide to the left and hit her aside with the back of his blade. The black-haired girl bit the inside of her cheek hard as she corrected her footing in anticipation for another blow from Hitsugaya.
Their blades clashed once more, the air around them radiating such chilled reiatsu Rukia wouldn't be surprised if it suddenly snowed. Not that she cared about that. At this moment, all that mattered to her was wiping off that unimpressed, nearly mocking sneer on Hitsugaya's face. Nothing she could have done could possibly amount to her deserving this patronizing air coming from him.
"Really, Kuchiki, are you even trying?" The white-haired captain sneered when their swords crossed yet again. "All this reiatsu and your zanpakuto wasted because this is the best that you can do?"
A jump back followed by a sweep to the right. "Taichou, what are you—?"
"Ukitake had such high hopes for you and this is what you have to show for it?" Hitsugaya parried her sword with enviable ease before starting his own series of strikes. "Is this the most you can make out of your two weeks training? Is merely this the result of the time I spent on you? Is this supposed to make your brother proud of you?"
The last two remarks stung especially hard as if she was physically stabbed, made even worse by the memories of her grieving over Byakuya's death.
"I never even got to thank you...for being the family I've always wanted! I never got to show you...how much stronger I've become…because of you!"
But the captain was not done striking at her sword. "How can you expect to beat a Hollow with that kind of power? What do you think can you accomplish the way you are now?"
"I'm trying, damn it! You know I am—!"
"Not hard enough, or else you would be facing me with your shikai by now, wouldn't you?" Hitsugaya swung at her with such force that it made Rukia jump away from him with a gasp. "Don't you care that your comrades can die in front of you because you can't really fight? Or have you forgotten how that went for you the last time? When your Lieutenant had to die?"
Kaien-dono… Rukia felt the cold seep into her blood.
"I dragged you into this. My stubbornness has caused you pain. I'm sorry."
Even though she had moved past his death, the memories of it still weighed heavily on her. "Why are you bringing Kaien-dono into this…?"
Hitsugaya's eyes narrowed as thunder loomed overhead. "He was the first in your Division to see you beyond your family name, he trained you and became your friend. But he died, and you couldn't do anything about it! You could not do anything back when he died because you were weak!"
"You—! How dare you—?!"
"Tell me, Kuchiki, are you still the same weak Shinigami rookie as you were back then? Are you fine with it?" Hitsugaya darted in front of her again, his sword poised to strike. "Are you?!"
"NO!" Rukia blocked the strikes that came one after another, not caring that her face was being whipped by the cold wind and the frosty reiatsu emanating from the other Shinigami's sword.
"Then stop telling me and show me! You're a Shinigami! A Shinigami fights to protect! Don't you have something you want to keep safe? Don't you have something worth fighting for?" The blow of crashing swords forced the two apart again.
Something worth fighting for.
Rukia's eyes sharpened, her vision flickering with images from her past life.
Sado. Ishida. Orihime. Ichigo. Renji. Nii-sama—
Metastacia. Arruruerie. Aizen. Ywach. Their faces shifting and jeering within the gigantic mound of flesh that was Äs Nödt.
Rukia flinched again. Please not this! God, what do I have to do to make this stop?!
"SNAP OUT OF IT!" Hitsugaya's blade hit Rukia's head again, making the girl stumble and glare at him. But Hitsugaya jumped back and hefted his blade in both hands, his ice dragon roaring behind him. "You have it, don't you? Remember that time back in Sokyoku Hill! Remember the ryoka and everyone who defied the Gotei 13 to save you! Are you going to let that bastard Aizen take them all away?"
Kaien's rain drenched face. Ishida and Sado standing back to back in the middle of a horde of Menos. Orihime standing, terrified, behind Ulquiorra. Byakuya's bloodied corpse. Ichigo bifurcated by Ywach. Renji's entire left upper torso gone. Toushirou's broken body over bloodied ice.
"If you have something you absolutely must protect, then nothing should scare you more than losing it because you were too afraid to fight!" Hitsugaya roared over the billowing wind. "SO FIGHT! FOCUS ON THEM AND FIGHT! KUCHIKI!"
A drop of water splashed on Rukia's face, a breath of cool air slamming into her lungs.
Hitsugaya's words drew Byakuya's voice back from a distant time, of the siblings standing in the garden one quiet dawn.
"Your emotions are too closely tied to your power that direct confrontation will only make it worse. When you feel overwhelmed by the negative emotions to the point that you are losing control of your reiatsu, you need to divert your focus. Let that focus overcome every other emotion and be the stability your zanpakuto needs."
"That does make sense, Nii-sama. But what do you think is the best thing to use as my focus?"
"...If it were me, it would be my reason to fight."
"Your reason to fight?"
"If there is something that I wish to protect more than anything, nothing should matter more than holding onto that which I treasure most. Even guilt, pain and fear become second to winning even if it costs me everything. If you can find something to focus on that would give you the same drive, then you will succeed."
"Something I must absolutely protect…"
"Focus on what matters the most." Memory Byakuya's voice rang clearer. "See only what you wish to protect, and everything you can give in battle will follow."
...Sado. Ishida. Orihime. Ichigo. Renji. Nii-sama... She felt her heart clench when she saw windswept snowy locks, warm green irises and a hesitant but genuine smile before her eyes.
Toushirou...
/Rukia-sama, I can feel you!/ Sode no Shirayuki cried out from their inner world. /Just a little more! You're almost there!/
A surge of energy burst in Rukia's chest, her eyes brighter than they had ever been for the past two weeks. Like hell I'm going to let Aizen, Ywach or some other motherfucker take them from me again!
Sado. Ishida. Orihime. Ichigo. Renji. Nii-sama. Toushirou.
Never again!
/Yes, dearest. Together!/
"...MAE, SODE NO SHIRAYUKI!"
Her sword turned white, the blade into snow and her hilt grew a ribbon, even before Rukia released her shikai with a blast of cold wind.
Hitsugaya's eyes widened as he and Hyourinmaru jumped back. But by the time Hitsugaya regained his footing at the right, Rukia had already raised her blade from behind four rising trails of snow. "Tsugi no Mai: Hakuren!"
A beam of white frost burst from Sode no Shirayuki's tip hurtling straight for the captain in a burst of white. Rukia watched with bated breath, her sword in both hands, waiting for the icy gales to clear the mist resulting from the plethora of chilled reiatsu. A few feet away from her Hitsugaya stood practically unscathed, to Rukia's relief and slight disappointment. She didn't manage to hit him after all.
But to her surprise, the shorter Shinigami promptly sheathed his blade.
"Uhm, taichou?"
"It's fine. This spar is over." Hitsugaya said, his tone considerably more civil while raising a sleeve of his shihakusho. "Your last attack got me."
Rukia blinked. "But that wasn't a good hit."
"It's good enough for me." Hitsugaya gestured at her zanpakuto. "You already have what you came for."
It took five seconds for the fact to sink in.
"I…did it?" She whispered in disbelief, raising her sword up for a better look while Sode no Shirayuki's snow white form shined brightly back at her. "Oh god, yes! YES! I got it back ! I got my shikai back! I DID IT! SODE NO SHIRAYUKI, WE DID IT!"
Sode no Shirayuki watched in amusement as her mistress jumped around like an excited rabbit hugging the ice sword close. /It is good to be back, hime./
After the excitement of getting her shikai back wore off, it hit Rukia how exhausting the whole ordeal had been for her.
She had wanted to go back to the Kuchiki manor and snuggle deep into her futon until Monday morning. But seeing as her legs were still rather uncooperative, Hitsugaya made her take a breather once their feet hit dry land.
"I'm sorry for causing you this delay, Hitsugaya-taichou." Rukia said from her seat at the grassy water's edge.
"Don't worry about it. I expected that you would be drained after a spar like that." Hitsugaya said while drawing his blade and raising it over the frozen water. Rukia watched as azure reiatsu glowed around the blade, drawing energy of the same color from the lake.
She braced her sword to the ground. "Let me help with that, taichou—"
"You should focus on getting back onto your feet." Hitsugaya cut her off smoothly. "We both know that I took a lot out of you."
A soft smile tugged at Rukia's lips. "You did all of that on purpose, didn't you?"
The response was smug but half-hearted. "Weren't you the one who said that I never do anything without a reason?"
I know. The thought was so nostalgic it made Rukia smile. "Thank you so much for all of this, Hitsugaya-taichou. I don't know how I can possibly repay you for everything."
"I'm your teacher, Kuchiki. Getting you to that level is the point. You don't owe me anything."
"You didn't just help me get my shikai back," Rukia whispered, her voice soft yet firm. "You helped me realize how to face my weakness and overcome my fears. If it weren't for you giving that metaphorical slap to my face, I wouldn't have been able to remember...that protecting what I value the most is worth facing anything and everything."
Hitsugaya sheathed his sword before turning back to her, eyes and lips frowning. "You're...oddly fine with that."
"With what?" She was genuinely confused. "Getting my shikai back? Shouldn't I be?"
And in turn, it looked that her confusion confused him back. "After what happened during the spar earlier, I was honestly expecting you to be…" Hitsugaya shook his head. "Never mind. It's not important."
"You expected me to be mad." Rukia guessed. "I'll admit bringing up Nii-sama and Kaien-dono made me upset, but it's not like you did it because you were being cruel on purpose. I can't stay angry over that when you did all of it because you wanted to help me."
Hitsugaya's eyes dropped to the side. "I wasn't entirely confident that it would work. I didn't know you well enough to conclude anything. But after thinking and...asking around, I decided to give it a try." He crossed his arms and went on without looking at her. "That method earlier was the same thing Hyourinmaru did for me to get his release back."
Rukia's eyes widened in shock. Toushirou never spoke to her about this before. Curiosity burned through her but she held her tongue. It was obvious this was a delicate subject.
"I lost someone back in my Academy days. After that, there was a time when I was unable to summon Hyourinmaru's shikai. I ended up questioning everything I have done up to that point, including my purpose for being a shinigami. If being able to fight with my power was worth what it was taking from me." Hitsugaya chuckled mirthlessly. "It took Hyourinmaru beating the hell out of me one day for me to snap out of it."
Hitsugaya may not know this, but Rukia understood almost immediately. Kusaka.
"It didn't fix everything right away. For years, I couldn't get his face out of my head every time I would use Hyourinmaru. Even until now, I have to deal with not being able to do anything back then. But Hyourinmaru showed me that I still have a reason to fight. That no matter how I feel about the past, I can't let it stop me from protecting what I still have."
"Why….?" Rukia paused for a breath. "Why are you telling me all this?"
"To make thing even. And we made a deal, remember?"
"Eh?" The petite girl gaped. She honestly did not expect him to take that deal seriously. She didn't even expect him to care enough to remember!
"When I asked Ukitake why he thought I would be a good trainer for you, he said it was because we have more in common than just our elemental zanpakuto. It took me a while to realize why." Hitsugaya explained. "You're a tactical fighter, you prefer to use a balance of strength and strategy, you are able to maintain field awareness so that every move you make is not wasted. But more than that, you are held back by your past even if what had happened was not your fault. You were isolated from others for things beyond your control."
Green eyes finally met violet. "I've been where you are."
She didn't know how Hitsugaya found out enough about her past to know any of this. In the first life, it took the Blood War and those two months for her and Toushirou to find that they had much in common regarding their personalities, views and pasts. It started with her sharing more about herself before he became a little more open about his.
But she didn't care how, because in those green eyes she found the same look in Toushirou's eyes in the past, the one that told her that he was starting to see her as more than just another forgettable face in the Gotei 13 Shinigami sea.
"You're a strange one, all right. But what's even stranger is that maybe only someone like you can truly understand me."
"Someone like—? What's that supposed to mean, Hitsugaya-taichou?"
"You're your own kind of person, Kuchiki, and that's a good thing."
Rukia forced herself up with her sword, thankful that her legs are sturdier this time around.
"I've always admired you." Rukia said. "Especially when after I found out that Sode no Shirayuki was a zanpakuto of ice, I hoped to work and become as strong as you someday. But you are far stronger than I have always thought. If you really have been where I am now, and you were able to surpass that to be the way you are today…"
It was no exaggeration: as the youngest Shinigami to ever achieve bankai and earn the rank of captain, Hitsugaya was nothing short of legendary among the Academy students and the Gotei 13 alike. Despite never outright saying it before the Blood War, Rukia had always respected Hitsugaya for his achievements. But after becoming his friend in the past, she came to see that there was so much more to him to be admired and emulated.
I want to fight. I want to become even stronger. I want to be worthy to be your friend.
Rukia bowed to her waist. "Thank you very much for helping me get my shikai back, Hitsugaya-taichou. But if I may impose on your kindness a little longer, I would most appreciate it if you can please continue training me."
The air was silent for far too long, Rukia thought, but she didn't dare look up, fearing that her nerves may get the better of her if she did. Her heart was already hammering in her ribcage in anxiety, unable to decide whether she should continue hoping or set herself up for disappointment.
"...Are you sure about that?" Hitsugaya's sudden question nearly made her jump out of her skin. "You remember how I am as a mentor?"
"A strict perfectionist of a taskmaster," She answered immediately, her back straightening. "But I can take it."
White eyebrows shot up in disbelief. "I'll most likely run you ragged."
"Nothing new there."
"I'll have high expectations."
"Then I'll do my best to meet all of them."
"I'm not the friendliest of teachers."
"Compared to others I've met, you're doing pretty well." Rukia smiled. "You're talking to me now, aren't you?"
Was it just her, or did Hitsugaya look...floored? "You're not going to take no for an answer, are you?"
"More of, I'm really hoping I won't have to—oh!" Rukia turned when she saw a flicker of yellow from her right. "Hitsugaya-taichou, look! A firefly!"
Without waiting for his answer, Rukia jogged up to the grass blade where a blinking bulb of yellow sat delicately. It promptly flew off when she approached, joining a group of fireflies beginning their journey up the night sky.
"Wow! Look, there's another firefly! And another!" Rukia gasped in amazement. "I didn't know it was firefly season already! Wow, there's a lot of them!"
"You're acting like a child, Kuchiki."
Rukia tutted at the disapproving tone. "There's nothing wrong with appreciating something this nice! You should try it once in a while! It's great for relieving stress!"
Hitsugaya shot a look of such bafflement that it made Rukia internally balk. Perhaps she was pushing a bit too soon? "I—I apologize, Hitsugaya-taichou. I guess I just got too excited."
"...You're...not quite what I thought you'd be."
Wince. "Sorry—"
"I didn't say it was a bad thing." Hitsugaya said quickly, making her look back at him. "Just…"
"Strange?"
He was eyeing her oddly. She must not be pulling the innocent smile as well as she thought she was.
"That's one word for it." Hitsugaya conceded.
Silence.
Then a resigned sigh. "Same time tomorrow then."
"Yes, Hitsugaya-taichou."
"..."
"Oh, and taichou?"
"What?"
"...Don't you think it's tough to be a firefly, having a butt that glows at night?"
At Hitsugaya's third flabbergasted expression of the day, looking the same way Toushirou did when she asked him the first time, Rukia's belly ached so hard because she had to stifle her laughter.
"You can't be serious!"
The fight scene was inspired by the Rurouni Kenshin's Seijuro vs Kenshin Amakakeru Ryu no Hirameki fight. Just thought I'd put it in here. 😊
If Rukia seems a bit more forward than she should be, it's because after the first life, Rukia developed into a more socially forward character (somewhat). And despite her trying to distinguish Hitsugaya from Toushirou, she can't help but fall into the friendly banter they built in the past. The same goes with her and Byakuya.
Nothing really new with Renji and, later, Ichigo, because the three of them are already pretty much bros around this time.
One more filler friendship-y fluff chapter before we get to the Bount arc. Yay!
HEADCANONS BOARD:
-Rukia is better at being buddies with guys than girls. Seriously, most of the friendships she's made in her old life are with boys. There's also the thing that she doesn't do girl talk very well, nor does she have a lot of, ahem, feminine interests (coughhotguyscough).
-In the old life, Byakuya began training Rukia during the missing/timeskip years (post Winter War), and was the one who helped Rukia achieve her bankai.
-When relaxed and happy enough, there's a 30 to 40 percent chance of random!Rukia making an appearance. She gives Toushirou headaches. She makes Ichigo want to throw her out the window. She is considered a misunderstood genius by Orihime. She can actually make Byakuya smile (gasp!) Expect her to make more appearances, because she's awesome.
OMAKE:
Hitsugaya opened the screen door to the 13th Division captain's office with a harsh snap.
Ukitake gasped at the sudden intrusion, a hand over his heart, when he saw the younger Shinigami. "Ha, you scared me, Hitsugaya-taichou! You may have taken at least ten years of my life!"
But Hitsugaya, who slammed the door closed as loudly as he opened it, shot him a look that clearly said, "Look at all the fucks I give."
It had been quite a day for him. He had to finish double the amount of paperwork today, even with Matsumoto surprisingly being around to help. He had to suffer through some dumbass recruits thinking they could undermine his authority because he was younger than them (his reputation might not precede him as he thought). And he practically shunpoed from lake Hibana to get here as fast as possible after sparring with Kuchiki.
Needless to say, the 10th Division captain was looking forward to his head hitting his futon after this whole day was over. But after what happened by the lake, Hitsugaya knew he would not be able to rest without getting some answers. And by Seireitei, he will get them.
/Master, be patient. Flaring up your reiatsu at this time will not get you anywhere./
The young Shinigami let out a long breath before drawing his cold energy back in. He hadn't realized that he was exuding too much of it again. It wouldn't do to make Ukitake's cough worse.
"Is there anything I can help you with?" Ukitake asked him slowly after a slightly calmer Hitsugaya had taken his seat across the captain's desk.
"It's about Kuchiki."
"Oh?" A look of concern crossed the older man's face. "Did something happen?"
"The reason why she cannot summon her shikai is because she is subconsciously repressing herself. According to her, she was seeing flashbacks of her past during our fight that make her afraid and distracted."
The other captain sighed. "I thought as much. What with everything that has happened to her, not including the incidents as of late." Calm green eyes met narrowed teal. "You want to know more."
Hitsugaya scoffed. "She's technically my student. If I am to help her, I need to know more about what could possibly be causing the suppression."
"You know I cannot tell you everything."
"Then just tell me enough."
The long-haired man's gaze turned appraising. "You seem awfully curious about this, Hitsugaya-taichou."
You think I have more in common with Kuchiki than our elemental zanpakuto. You can't blame me for wanting to know if the past is one of those things. Not that Hitsugaya can tell Ukitake, but Kuchiki's situation was hauntingly similar to his many years ago, of that time he could not summon Hyourinmaru (much less touch or look at the sword) because of what happened to Kusaka…
"I need to at least have some idea of what I'm dealing with here." The younger captain eventually supplied, meeting the other captain's green eyes with his own.
The pair fell silent for a moment before Ukitake sipped his tea. "...All right. Let's start with what you know first."
Hitsugaya paused. "Not much, obviously. All I know is that she is Kuchiki-taichou's adoptive sister, the youngest member of the Kuchiki family, graduated early from Shin'o Academy because of it." He looked at Ukitake sharply. "Surprisingly talented and capable for an unseated officer. Were she in my Division, she would be at least be at 5th seat."
Ukitake exhaled, visibly frustrated. "If that were solely up to me, that would also be the case. But I have my hands tied, and I don't think Byakuya is going to change his mind regarding the matter any time soon."
Hitsugaya frowned at that. It wasn't unusual for a noble to rise in the ranks of Gotei 13, especially if they were considerably skilled. Kuchiki-taichou was a prime example of this, and was someone Hitsugaya respected for his work ethic and prowess in battle. So why was the 6th Division captain holding back the undeniably talented younger Kuchiki?
/I may be able to think of a few reasons./
Whatever they may be, they are illogical and would not fit someone like Kuchiki-taichou's usual way of thinking.
/I can see you doing the same for Tobiume's mistress, actually./
...Why are you bringing Hinamori into this?
"Rukia would always struggle to fit in wherever she went." Ukitake went on. "When she became a noble by adoption, and when Byakuya made it so she graduated early, most of the Division judged her harshly and isolated her because of her status. But even before she became a Kuchiki, Rukia had a hard time in the Academy when she was looked down on because she came from Rukongai."
"Wait, Rukongai?" Hitsugaya's eyes widened and he leaned forward. "She came from Rukongai?"
"Inuzuri, to be exact, the same as Abarai." Ukitake clarified.
Inuzuri, one of the poorest and most dangerous districts. He knew Kuchiki was adopted, but Hitsugaya did not expect her to come from such a desolate place. The fact that she managed to survive all of that while still being who she is today…
/That girl…is far stronger than she appears./
"It also did not help that she was quite closed off, not that I blame her, considering her upbringing. But between the two of them, it was Abarai back then who had the charisma to make friends. Her difficulty in approaching people on her own and her separation from Abarai made it harder for her to adjust in our Division. It was a good thing that Kaien took her in when he did."
"Shiba Kaien. Your former lieutenant."
"Ah. He became her first friend and mentor, along with Miyako. He helped her reach her shikai the first time." Ukitake ran a hand through his long white hair. "It was a terrible blow for her when we lost them both. You are aware of how they died?"
Hitsugaya looked back into his memory again. "Killed in action, was it?"
"That's good enough. Kaien's death was especially hard on Rukia, however; she was there when it happened." Ukitake shook his head. "I'm afraid I cannot give you more details. That is Rukia's story to tell. Just know that it may be one of the culprits holding her back from releasing her shikai, and that…" A deep sigh. "I truly regret that I've let it escalate to that point. I failed both of them as their captain and I will take that failure with me to my grave."
The man took another sip of tea. "Rukia, she's a fount of potential. But all the guilt and insecurities she had accumulated her whole life is keeping her from reaching it to the fullest. I wish I could say I am enough to help her, but I believe that it would much better for her to have someone who can push her to that point. Someone who knows and understands where she came from. Someone who was once in her shoes, learned how to overcome that weakness, and can teach her how to do it."
Hitsugaya's grips on his armrest became tighter. He can't possibly...! "Ukitake, you—"
"And there was a time when you were in the same situation, weren't you, Hitsugaya-taichou?" Ukitake interrupted him. "I am not privy of the details, but the fact that you are here before me now as a captain proves that you were able to move past that hurdle. I am not sure how learning what I have told you could help, but I hope you will try. She has been an amicable student so far, hasn't she?"
The ice wielder will not deny it. True to what Ukitake said, Kuchiki was a hard worker, always giving her best in whatever task Hitsugaya set out for her. She was respectful, but at the same time she wasn't afraid to speak her mind while being aware of her boundaries. But what really intrigued him was that she wasn't intimidated by him. No matter how forceful or short he was at her, she would always take it in stride.
And now this…
She knew what loneliness and poverty was like. She was ostracized by many for something out of her control. She had lost someone who she called a friend. She had to live with the guilt of failing to save that friend.
/Master, if I may?/
Hitsugaya blinked. What is it?
/Seeing as your student's situation is rather similar to yours in the past, there is a strong possibility that your plan will work./
You sound sure.
/I feel that like you, she too has something other than herself that drives her to fight. Perhaps the fears and burdens she is carrying now is making her forget that fact./ The ice dragon told him. /And as her teacher, as someone who has been in her current predicament, you are in the best position to see her through./
Hitsugaya hummed, considering the thought. If you really think that, then Kuchiki and I are really more alike than I thought.
/I am sure we already have that established, Master./
The younger captain returned to his conversation with Ukitake. "This has been informative. I better get going. Thank you for your time."
"Oh? But—" Ukitake paused when Hitsugaya stood up without preamble and went for the door. "I understand. Please tell me if there's any other way I can help."
Hitsugaya gave a short nod and had already managed to open the door when Ukitake called out again.
"Oh and Shirou-taichou?"
A white eyebrow twitched irritably. "What?"
Ukitake smiled serenely at Hitsugaya's scowling face. "Thank you for taking care of Rukia."
"...It's not like I have a choice. You made her my responsibility now too." Hitsugaya said coolly.
He closed the shogi door before the older captain can say another word.
