Chapter 18: Past Relationships

"I love orchids!" Ema gasped when Iori brought her order of hot chocolate and she saw the cream in the shape of the flower.

Iori smiled. "I noticed you paying attention to them in the yard. I hoped it would make you happy."

"Do you always surprise the customers with something you'll think they'll like?" Ema asked, blowing on the drink before taking a sip. It was starting to get cold outside, so rather than waiting for Yusuke's soccer practice to end after school, she now occasionally stopped by Iori's work when he there. It was a nice way to warm up. And a good opportunity to speak with Iori, even if it was only for a few moments. At home, he was usually too busy with homework to spend much time talking. Ema had no idea how Iori got top grades at one of Japan's top high schools and still managed to have a part-time job on the side.

"Not usually," Iori admitted. "If people don't have a preference for what they want, the default is usually a rose. But you get so excited when it's something new that I enjoy surprising you every time."

Ema hid her smile behind her mug, a little embarrassed. "I look forward to your cream creations as much as I do the hot chocolate." And Iori's company, but it felt too awkward to say that.

"I'm flattered," Iori said, giving a half bow. Coming from most high school guys, the bow probably would have looked corny. Coming from Iori, the move was elegant and courtly. All Iori needed was the right costume and Ema would feel like she was a lady from Medieval Europe.

Iori rose from his bow and the playful look suddenly left his eyes, replaced by something frigid and cold before he covered it up.

Confused, Ema looked behind her to try to see what had caught Iori's attention. All she saw was a cute high school girl wearing a scarf and a timid expression as she looked around the shop. Her gaze stopped on Iori and she bit her lip.

"Excuse me, Ema," Iori said. "I have to get back to work."

Ema was surprised when Iori showed up at her table again a moment later without his work apron.

"Iori? Is something wrong?"

Iori shook his head, standing at an angle so he couldn't see the girl who seemed to have possibly been looking for him.

"I decided to take my break now. Is it all right if I join you?"

"Of course," Ema said, resisting the urge to look over her shoulder and see what the girl was doing. She couldn't say for certain that the girl was the cause of Iori's strange behavior, but something definitely seemed to have upset him. And he'd said he was going back to work, not that he planned to take his break. Iori had never taken a break from work while Ema had been there before.

"What drink do you have?" Ema asked, nodding at the drink in his hands. She didn't know what else to say, or how to bring up the fact that he was acting out of the ordinary.

"Hm?" Iori looked down, as though surprised to see the cup in his hands. "Oh, just something decaf. I like our coffee drinks, but it's too late for caffeine, and I'm not really in the mood for hot chocolate right now."

Iori went quiet and Ema tried to think through the sequence of events. A girl had walked into the shop, and then Iori suddenly became somber. The girl was most likely sitting in Iori's section, but rather than having to serve her, Iori chose to take his break instead so he could avoid her. Maybe that wasn't what had happened, but it seemed possible.

"Iori?" Ema said hesitantly. "Is everything all right? You've never taken a break while I've been here before."

Iori stared into his drink before finally saying, "You're really good at reading people. Did you know that? You pay attention to what makes people happy or sad, or when they're mood suddenly shifts. You're very sensitive to that kind of thing." He gave her a small smile. "You always celebrate everyone's success with them, or try to comfort them when they had a bad day."

He looked down at his drink again and sighed. "I guess I can tell you. From some of the things you've said, I think you've had similar experiences. The girl who just walked in is my ex-girlfriend."

His mouth tightened and for a moment, it looked as though he wouldn't continue. Ema was about to tell him he didn't have to tell her when he made himself relax, almost slouching in his seat. "We started dating in junior high and the two of us were really close with my best friend. The three of us were inseparable and Fuyuka, my girlfriend, and I already had plans to move in together after high school and attend the same college."

His gray eyes became wintry as he looked past Ema at a wall. Ema was glad that look wasn't directed at her. "But I guess I was just a fool about both of them. The boy who called himself my best friend was jealous of me, though I didn't know. He didn't like that I got better grades, that I was better at sports, and that more girls talked to me. He felt like if he could take just one thing away from me, if he could win at something over me, he would prove that he was better, that me being good at all those things didn't make me any better than him."

Ema's heart ached and she almost wanted to tell Iori to stop. Her situation of not having friends had broken her heart at times, but it was probably worse to have someone you thought was your friend, who you believed and trusted in, and only for them to betray you.

"He decided the one thing he would do was to get Fuyuka to cheat on me, to take her away." Iori's hands tightened around his cup until his fingers turned white.

Without thinking, Ema reached out and laid one of her hands on top of Iori's. She was afraid he would hurt himself holding so tightly. Or break the cup. Iori's gaze jerked up in surprise, but his eyes softened as he gave Ema an almost smile.

"My friend succeeded," he said quietly. "I don't know how long Fuyuka cheated on me, but my friend was thrilled to throw the evidence of it in my face. Fuyuka hadn't known about my friend's plan to prove he was better than me. She'd believed his lies that he'd been in love with her all this time and didn't know what to do anymore."

Iori shook his head, some of the darkness coming back into his eyes. "Fuyuka tried to play the victim, telling me she hadn't known anything about the plan and that we'd both been betrayed. She may not have known what our friends' plan was, but she made her own decisions. No one forced her to cheat on me. She did that herself. She comes here sometimes, trying to get me to forgive her. I won't talk to her at school. I think she hopes I'll have to talk to her here if she's a customer."

Now Ema was the one with the hard eyes. What happened to Fuyuka was sad and wrong, but, like Iori said, she was her own person capable of making her own decisions. She had been dating an amazing guy and had decided to cheat on him because another guy told her he liked her. If she'd truly cared for Iori, she would have ignored him when he started making advances. And if she hadn't truly cared for Iori, she should have broken up with him to go out with someone else.

Ema looked at her hand covering Iori's and decided she could tell him her story too. She'd never told anyone other than Arisa the whole story about Carlos, and no one knew the whole story with Erik. Maybe she would feel better if she talked about it.

"You're right that I had some bad things happen to," she said quietly. "Though, I think the first one was partially my fault." She gave Iori a sad smile. "I dated twice while I lived abroad. Carlos was the first one, and he lived in Italy. He was the first guy to like me, the first one to pay attention to me as a girl and tell me I was pretty." She shook her head at herself. "I thought he was sweet and I was so caught up in feeling special that a guy liked me for the first time that I wasn't paying enough attention to who he really was."

Her hand tightened over Iori's. She wished Carlos' cruel words didn't still have the power to hurt her. "After we'd been dating for a while, I found out he was going out with two other girls. He told me I wasn't interesting enough by myself to keep his attention, so he needed more than just me."

Iori frowned as he turned his hand over to hold Ema's, covering her hand with his free hand. "How is that your fault? You deserve to feel special. Your first thought about your boyfriend, even if it's your first boyfriend, shouldn't be that he's dating other girls too. And he was wrong. You are interesting, Ema."

Ema shrugged one shoulder. She had done a lot of interesting things, but that didn't mean she was an interesting person. And she wasn't convinced she hadn't been stupid. When she'd emailed Hikaru about Carlos, he'd warned her Carlos sounded like a major flirt and not to trust him. Ema had been so caught up in the sweet things Carlos did like bringing her flowers and complimenting her every time he saw her that she hadn't listened to Hikaru.

"The second relationship was harder," Ema said, staring at her and Iori's hands because it was easier than looking at Iori as she spoke. She didn't believe for a second that Iori would judge her for any of this, but she felt vulnerable talking about it. If she looked into Iori's eyes, she would feel even more vulnerable.

"Erik was from the United States and he made me feel worthwhile. I'd given up on forming new relationships at that point. It was just too hard when Dad and I would move in a few weeks or a few months. Erik was persistent and I came to really trust him. Even Dad liked him. He convinced me that we could make a long-distance relationship work, and even came to visit me a few times after we left the United States."

She sighed and shrugged, trying to give the impression that what she said next didn't really matter. "But in the end, it was too hard for him. I wasn't worth enough to him to keep up our relationship long-distance." He hadn't said those words, but that's wait their breakup had amounted to. Having a girlfriend who live abroad and constantly moved was just too difficult.

It had been so much worse with Erik than with Carlos. Carlos she'd only dated for two months. Erik she had dated for almost a year, and their relationship had been so much deeper. She and Carlos hadn't really had anything in common, but Ema and Erik could talk for hours without running out of things to say. He had really made Ema believe they could make their relationship work long distance.

"Those guys were fools," Iori said, squeezing Ema's hand between his own.

"And apparently they're not the only fools in the world," Ema said, returning Iori's squeeze. "On the first day I came back and you said something about it being hard to trust people, I thought if someone could choose to betray Iori of all people, what hope is there in relationships for the rest of us?"

"I don't know that I'd give up all hope just yet," Iori said. Ema was relieved that the dark look seemed to have left his eyes.

The bell of the shop tinkled and Ema looked back to see Fuyuka leaving. Ema wondered if she'd seen Iori and Ema holding hands and misunderstood. Part of her hoped she had and that Fuyuka would leave Iori alone now. Betraying him was bad enough, but trying to pressure him into dating her again was wrong. If she really cared about Iori, she would respect his space.

"I'd better get back to work," Iori said. "For real this time. Thank you for listening, Ema, and for sharing with me." He paused. "You know, I think the key might be to build trust before starting a relationship. You should know who a person really is before you start dating them. I think it's better to date someone you know you can trust rather than trying to build trust while also building a romantic relationship."

"You know, Iori, I think you might be right," Ema agreed. Partially because a philosophy like that still allowed her to not date for a long, long time.

~.~

"Was that your girlfriend?" One of Iori's coworkers asked after Ema left.

"Ema?" Iori asked. "No, she's a childhood friend. Both of us have chosen not to date right now."

"Really?" His coworker asked. "You two seemed close. And she's come to visit you by herself a couple times."

Iori shrugged, showing a small smile. "Well, you never know what might happen in the future."

Iori was glad he had decided to be honest with Ema, and happy she had chosen to be honest with him as well. He had been right when he thought Ema was different from other girls. And now he and Ema both knew that they understood how one another felt since they'd been through similar experiences.

It was good for him to have Ema in his life again, and he thought it was also good for Ema to have him in her life again. Maybe they could help make sure neither of them got hurt again like they had in the past.