A/N: I haven't been able to update as often as I'd like, so I hope this looooonnnnggg chapter makes you all happy. All characters, places, and events you recognize belong to Marvel, Disney, etc. Thanks, dristi5683! You are a great help.


Day 227

Boulder, Colorado

Jane picked up the manila envelope. The guy from Rising Tide had handed it to her when she'd gotten the car in Albuquerque. "Open it when you get to your first destination," he had said. "Oh, and you'll need to know this password phrase..."

Here she was, in a budget hotel in Boulder. Her first destination. Where would the next location be? She unsealed the envelope, then hesitated. Maybe such drastic measures weren't necessary. She could just take the nice job at the Earth Systems Research Laboratory, keep a low profile, mind her own business—

"Ooff," she grunted. "That was a hard kick, kid." Alie was growing rapidly. She—he?—was already punching and kicking at a time when most pregnant mamas hadn't felt a flutter yet. This baby was unmistakably extraordinary. Keeping a low profile probably wasn't going to work out. Jane needed to have "no profile."

So she sat down and upended the envelope. A mobile phone slid out onto the generic bedspread. Jane experimentally pushed the power button; it started up right away. She peered inside the envelope and drew out one sheet of paper. "Possible rentals" was scrawled across the top. Below that were three phone numbers. One of them had "call this one first—promising!" penned next to it. She picked up the unfamiliar phone and slowly tapped in the digits.

It rang twice, then a man said, "Hello?"

"Hello, um, Uncle Frank? It's me."

"Yes?"

"Aunt Betty said I should call when I arrived," Jane said carefully. It was important to get the passphrase right.

"Hang on."

"Okay. Thanks." Jane held her breath until a woman came on the line.

"Is that you?"

"Yeah, it's me, Aunt Betty. I'm here safely. In my hotel room."

"Oh, I'm glad. How was your drive?"

"It was fine."

"Good, good. What will you do tomorrow?"

"I'll make some calls, look for a place to rent. Wednesday I go meet my new boss."

"I sure hope we can find you a nice place to rent soon. Anything else you need?"

Safety. Reassurance. Salvation. A miracle.

"No, I'm fine. Talk to you later, Aunt Betty."

Jane flopped down on the plasticky hotel pillows, then winced. Lying on her back was getting uncomfortable. She shifted to her side and was greeted by a kick, then another. And another. She pressed her hand to her belly.

"Easy, Alie. Mama's had a tough couple of days." Kick. "I'm really tired." Kick. Jane sighed. "You're already pig-headed, aren't you? Guess you come by that naturally. I've been told I'm a bit stubborn, and your father—"

Jane bit her words off and hauled herself upright. There was no point in going down that road. She shivered, absorbing one of the waves of grief that washed over her more and more frequently. The goodbyes in New Mexico the day before had wrenched her heart in a way she hadn't dared let her friends see. After picking up the Toyota from "that guy," she had driven only a couple of miles before she had to pull over, blinded by tears.

But she had resolved not to indulge in self-pity or recriminations any longer, so after a good, cleansing cry, she'd headed north on interstate 25. Leaving your life behind was hard. She shivered again, this time goosebumps raising on her arms. I need to put on another layer of clothes.

oooOOOooo

Sometimes, if she stayed up long enough, if she exhausted herself, she didn't dream. It had been two weeks since her last encounter with Loki, and Jane was eager to extend the streak. She had learned to watch for the signs that Loki was beaming in. Some nights he didn't appear, and other nights she had no recollection of dreaming. Those were the best nights.

So far this evening, the late-night television show wasn't helping her stay awake. The jokes weren't funny and the guests seemed embarrassed to be there. The ergonomically incorrect "easy" chair, on the other hand, was keeping her eyes open, as was the heartburn from dinner. The combined effect left her drowsy and in a grouchy mood.

Grocery shopping was on her to-do list for tomorrow. The food from Isabel was nearly gone, and eating out every meal was expensive and hard on her pregnant tummy. There wasn't a kitchen in the hotel room, but she had a microwave and a tiny fridge. She'd make do.

The boring TV show ended and another began. Jane sighed. Three boxes full of the hard copies of her research sat in the corner of the hotel room. She could start the work of sifting through that.

Ugh. Not tonight.

A chill ran through her. Jane frowned; she was wearing flannel pajamas and had set the thermostat to a generous 72 degrees. Oh please, I can't get sick. Her throat didn't hurt, though she did have a slight headache. Maybe she could get warm under the covers. She wouldn't go to sleep; she'd just watch TV from the bed and...

oooOOOooo

The two paper sacks of groceries were so full Jane couldn't see where she was going. She hoped Darcy hadn't left anything laying on the floor. Depositing the bags on the kitchen counter, Jane grabbed the carton of milk and turned to open the fridge.

Loki loomed in front of her, anger contorting his face.

A paper carton of milk doesn't shatter, but explodes, Jane discovered. She whirled away from the furious demi-god, heading for shelter in the bathroom. He was faster and blocked her path.

"Where have you been?" he snarled.

His breathing was labored, noted the part of her brain not consumed with the fight-or-flight response. The rest of her brain commanded her feet to run! Jane sidestepped Loki, darted into the bathroom, and locked the door.

"Answer me!" demanded his voice from behind her. Fear jolted her blood. She whirled around. Loki narrowed his eyes at her. Reflexively, she hunched her shoulders and cradled her belly. "Did you think a flimsy Midgardian door would keep me out?" he asked. "Did you think you could hide forever? You've caused me a great deal of pain, Jane Foster. Those who do so usually suffer a prolonged, painful demise. How fortunate for you that I need you alive."

Fortunate? I'm fortunate to have attracted Loki's attention? Even in her panicked state, Jane appreciated the absurdity. She couldn't stifle a hiccup of laughter.

Loki took a menacing step toward her, breathing raggedly. "Do you dare mock me?"

Jane straightened and dropped her arms. The moment of levity had cleared her head. This is my lab. We're in Puente Antiguo. This is a dream. I'm not really at Loki's mercy. Faking a calmness she didn't feel yet, she said, "I wouldn't dream of mocking you, Loki. I've been nothing but fortunate in my association with you."

"I will punish your defiance!" He advanced on her, but she stood her ground and took her time looking him over. The green and gold military outfit he wore looked like it had seen a number of battles. Was that blood on the sleeve? His face was even paler than usual and covered in a fine sheen of sweat. Bruises marred his temples and cheekbones. His hair was stringy and limp, strands clinging to his face.

"What defiance? As I recall," Jane said, "the last time we met, you warned me to stay out of your dreams or I would pay dearly."

"Do not twist my words!" Loki suddenly grabbed both her arms and pulled her against his chest. She was pressed against him from shoulder to knee. The rune brand on her wrist sang at the physical contact, but she wasn't fooled this time. This was violence, a display of power to force her to his will. This wasn't Kai.

Jane turned her head to the side to avoid being crushed into his breastplate. Stay calm. This isn't real. Not completely, anyway. She braced herself and said, "You need to make up your mind." Try to figure out what's going on. "What do you want from me? And what do you want with the Tesseract?"

"I don't want anything from you, mortal. And the Tesseract is none of your concern."

"Great. I'll be on my way, then."

His grip tightened. "I forbid it! You won't leave!"

"No? You were the one who taught me that I'm in control in my dreams."

"You can't," he demanded, but she was already using the trick she'd learned.

"This is only a dream. I'm going to wake up in five, four, three, two, one..."

Jane didn't sleep the rest of the night, but watched junk television, chilled to the bone, still feeling the imprint of his fingers on her tender skin.

oooOOOooo

Day 228

Boulder, Colorado

"Hello, I'm calling about the apartment for rent...oh, okay. Thank you."

"Yes, I'm enquiring about the house for rent...uh-huh...no, I don't actually have references. But I—goodbye."

"Hello, is the apartment on Pine Street still available? Great. Could I see it? Yes, I'm available tomorrow. At four? Jane Foster. Thank you."

oooOOOooo

Apples, a big bag of salad, a loaf of bread, a half-gallon of milk, a couple of cartons of yogurt, and a block of good cheddar. That should hold her for a couple of days. Oh, and a hot water bottle. She was still shivering.

After spending a miserable night avoiding sleep, Jane had expected to greet the dawn with a fever and sore throat, but neither materialized. Nothing seemed to be wrong except that she felt like her core temperature had dropped. Could it be some kind of stress reaction? She made a mental note to look it up later.

For now, she had work to do. Jane tossed a pillow onto the floor and tried to make herself comfortable as she began the tedious process of sorting loose papers and thumbing through notebooks. Most of the mass was suitable for recycling. Some of the papers she'd prefer to burn—too bad she hadn't done this while she was still in Puente Antiguo. Occasionally, she'd come across a "keep" document and snap a photo of it with her new phone.

And still she shivered.

Her stomach growled. "Hungry already?" She glanced at her phone. Six o'clock. "All right, just give me a second." Jane flipped through the last few pages of a spiral-bound notebook from her last year of grad school (oh, those happy naive times), then set it on the recycle pile and grabbed the next one out of the box. She'd look at it while eating the deli sandwich and pickles stashed in the fridge.

"Yum. Roast beef. This is good stuff, kid." Jane opened the notebook and chuckled. This one was just from last year. "Guess I'm not that chronologically organized, huh?"

The contents were mostly benign stuff—notes on the research she was doing before aliens started falling like stars to the surface of the Earth. A few pages were filled with her questions and observations about Thor. This was evidently one notebook SHIELD hadn't gotten their hands on. One page contained a hastily written note about the Destroyer and seeing Thor transformed. Jane paused, but there was no anxiety in the memory. "Life's moved on to a whole new level of weird," she whispered.

She turned several more leaves, but they were blank. This notebook had apparently been abandoned after the trauma. "Shred!" she declared, and tossed it across the room. A napkin fluttered out of the flying notebook. What was that? She squinted at the nearly-illegible markings. "Oh," she breathed, feeling the shock of discovery again. These were Darcy's notes from that day in Isabel's cafe. Thor: Asgardian Aesir. Loki: Aesir Frost Giant?

Of course—the odd chills she'd been having. How could she have forgotten, even for a second? Loki wasn't Aesir. He was Jotun. A Frost Giant. A species she knew virtually nothing about.

Yay. And the hits just keep on coming, kids.

"Is it too hot in there for you, Alie? Are you trying to turn the AC on?"

oooOOOooo

Jane tidied up from her modest dinner, then sat staring into space, trying hard to think about nothing. After she tired of this impossible task, she sighed and stood up, feeling the weariness in every muscle. It was no use trying to stay awake tonight. Maybe it was smarter to see how much sleep she could get before Loki ruined it.

She filled the hot water bottle and pushed it under the covers to the foot of the bed, then hesitated.

"Do you mind if I warm my feet?" Jane asked her bump. No answer was forthcoming.

She performed her bedtime ablutions and pulled on the flannel pajamas, then stripped them off again. She was cold, but she didn't want Alie to be too warm. "Ugh," she groaned. "A manual would have been helpful."

Jane crawled into bed. The hot water bottle felt heavenly at her feet, but still she felt a chill. Would it keep her awake? Jane tried to imagine New Mexico in the summer, a hot dry heat...

oooOOOooo

The milk was still in a puddle on the floor, the busted container on its side. Jane froze and scanned the lab, alert for any movement or that magicky feeling that meant Loki was on his way. But the lab seemed safe. Empty and...cold? Jane shivered. Ugh.

"Alie," she whispered, "it would be nice if I didn't have to feel cold even in my dreams."

oooOOOooo

Day 229

Boulder, Colorado

Daylight filtered through the cheap hotel blinds. Jane groaned and buried her face in the pillow. Time to get going. She couldn't sleep the day away, though it was tempting. If only she could get warm and stay warm. At least she hadn't had to face Loki in her dreams.

oooOOOooo

"What can I get for you?"

"What's your best drink?"

"How about the chai latte?"

"Sounds good. I'm going to be working around here and I need a go-to coffee shop, you know?"

"Where will you be working, if you don't mind me asking?"

"At the NOAA lab."

"That's pretty close by. Welcome to the neighborhood! Here you go. Hope to see you back soon!"

oooOOOooo

"So just fill this application out; it's standard. Bring it back with proof of income and we'll let you know."

"Thanks. Um, do I get that proof of income from an employer?"

"That's right."

"Okay. I'm brand-new at my job, so I'm just learning the ropes."

"Where do you work?"

"At ESRL, the lab over by the university."

oooOOOooo

One box was empty. Jane packed the notebooks back into it. She needed to find a shredding center. "At least I'm more organized than I've been in a while. I think I've earned a warm bath before bed. What do you say, Alie?"

oooOOOooo

That darn milk was still on the floor. And the groceries were on the counter.

"I shouldn't have to clean up in a dream, should I?" Jane grumbled.

"I shouldn't think so," came the reply.

Jane swore. How could she have let a stupid puddle of milk distract her?

"My sentiments exactly," Loki said.

She reluctantly turned. He stood by the dining table, keeping his distance this time. He looked exactly as awful as he had two nights before. Where was he, really? What was happening to him?

"Get out," she said calmly.

"Jane, please," he began.

She shrugged. "If you won't leave, then I will. This is only a dream..."

"I need your help..."

"I'm going to wake up in..."

"I don't like it..."

"...five..."

"I hardly think I deserve to need your help..."

"...four..."

"...but there you have it."

"...three..."

"I'm losing my mind!"

"...two..."

"Don't you feel better when you're with me?"

"...one..."

Jane blinked her eyes, grateful to be in her little hotel room. She laughed. Don't you feel better when you're with me? Add that to the list of utterly ridiculous quotes from Loki.

A deep shiver shook her. Her eyes opened wide and she sat up straight in her bed. She hadn't felt cold at all for the couple of minutes she'd been with Loki in her dream. Another string of curses escaped her lips.

oooOOOooo

Day 230

Boulder, Colorado

"Dr. Foster. We are honored to have you working with us at ESRL."

"It's really my pleasure. I only hope I can help you, as my experience is in phenomena beyond Earth's atmosphere."

"Your recent unpublished work on the effect of interdimensional bridges on the ozone layer is germaine to our research. You will be a valuable resource to our staff."

"I look forward to joining you in a couple of weeks. Thank you for making me feel welcome."

"Is there any way we can help you settle in to life in Boulder?"

"Actually, I have a question about life outside of Boulder. I'd love to get your recommendation for the best place to watch the sky. I know there's an amazing observatory here on campus, but where can I go to be out in nature and watch meteor showers? I'll always be an astrophysicist at heart."

"Hmm...it's several hours away, but there's Black Canyon of the Gunnison National Park. I personally know several astronomers who won't go anywhere else to watch the sky. Plus the wilderness is simply breathtaking."

oooOOOooo

"I'm fine, Darce, really I am. You know, I think everything's going to be fine. Getting away from SHIELD and out of Puente Antiguo was just what I needed. Lots of women are single moms with exes they'd rather forget. You helped me through the worst part. I'll always be grateful."

oooOOOooo

Flickering light teased the edges of her sleep. Jane stepped through the oversized doorway. A robust fire danced in a massive stone fireplace, throwing her shadow up to the high vaulted ceiling. Tall arched windows reflected the golden radiance. Seduced by the promise of warmth, Jane drew closer to the hearth.

Something about this room tickled her memory. Was this a castle she had visited for stargazing? Somewhere in Scotland, perhaps? Jane turned, looking for a point of familiarity. Her eye landed on an ancient astronomy instrument, perched in a position of honor on an ornate table. An old astrolabe! Beautiful!

An astrolabe. A large stone fireplace. Cathedral ceiling and arched windows. The pieces falling into place made a nearly-audible click in her mind. Jane slowly turned. There was the immense four-poster bed with drapes. Emerald green velvet drapes, to be precise. She had been here before. Once before. Just for a night. The night.

All of which meant that the roaring fire wasn't the true reason she felt warm. Loki must be here somewhere. Stupid deceitful dream. Jane refused to look for Loki; she wouldn't give him the satisfaction. She drew a breath, prepared to recite her mantra.

Before she could utter a syllable, a honey-smooth voice flowed through the room. "This is only a dream." It was Kai's voice, the one pitched low to entice. Don't look around, Jane. Don't do it.

Jane gritted her teeth, and tried again. "This—"

"Is only a dream, Jane. It is only a dream. What happens here doesn't have to have any consequences when you awaken."

She almost choked. No consequences? She wasn't falling for that line again.

He continued in that hypnotizing voice, "Won't you please stay? Just for a while? Come, sit down, enjoy the fire. I won't raise my voice this time. I certainly won't touch you."

Jane closed her eyes, willing herself to say the words to end this dream. But she was warm when she hadn't stopped shivering in days. And her head didn't hurt. And she could wake up whenever she wanted to, couldn't she? So she opened her eyes and turned, looking for Loki.

"I'm here, on the other side of the fireplace."

Jane frowned and faced the fireplace again. And she saw what she hadn't noticed before—what surely hadn't been there before: the towering fireplace was not part of a wall of the room, but was freestanding, dividing two halves of the chamber. She slowly walked around the stone structure.

Here was the working side of the room. There were windows only on the far wall. Books lined the other two sides from floor to ceiling. A great wooden work table stretched in front of the windows, cluttered with papers and glass and instruments...a lab of sorts. And in front of the fireplace were two large (of course) leather armchairs and a low table. The table was set for tea, and Loki sat in one of the armchairs, eyes burning into hers. She blinked and looked away.

"Won't you sit down, Jane?" he asked.

"I didn't know there were two sides to this room," she blurted.

Loki smiled politely. "How could you know? I don't believe you've visited the royal palace of Asgard."

"I was here—" Shut. Up. Jane. Foster. She shook her head. "Never mind. My mistake."

"Sit down, please," he urged. She complied, sinking into the empty chair, folding her hands on her lap. What am I doing?

"Tea?" he asked.

Loki is offering me tea. Loki is being polite. Loki is clearly playing an angle. Be careful. "No, thank you."

"Are you comfortable, Jane?"

Why did he keep saying her name? When had she stopped insisting he call her Dr. Foster?

"I am comfortable, thank you." And she was. It felt wonderful to be free of the deep coldness. The chair was amazing, the room was a visual feast, the fire was soothing, and the company was...suspect.

"You look terrible."

Jane snorted. "Thanks, Loki. You look pretty rough yourself." And he did. The circles under his eyes, the hollows under his sharp cheekbones, the slight trembling in his hands...wherever he actually was, whatever he was actually doing these days, it was not a picnic. It probably took a considerable amount of energy to appear relaxed and polite.

"I doubt you are sleeping well, Jane."

"I doubt you are sleeping at all, Loki. Are you truly asleep even now?"

"How do you feel at this moment?"

"How do you feel?"

Surprisingly, he ended the volley and answered. "I'm free to think again. I feel no pain. My chest, my head, my...other complaints. A soothing balm has been applied and I'm enjoying the respite, brief though it may be."

"That's nice," she answered automatically.

Loki leaned forward, his gaze suddenly flinty, his voice taking on a fine edge. "It's not nice. It's maddening, actually. It torments me nearly as much as the pain itself."

She had no idea what the right thing was to say, so she said nothing.

"Ask me why this state of affairs vexes me."

"No, thank you."

"Ask...me," he repeated, low and dangerous. He was keeping his word not to raise his voice, but this was perhaps worse.

"Why does the relief bother you as much as the pain?" Why am I humoring him? Because you're not shivering, the traitorous voice in her head answered.

"Because you are what takes my pain away. When I meet you in a dream, I feel restored. Whole."

"And why is that a problem? I mean, so what? If it works, who cares?" Jane asked, in a flash of misguided indignation.

"Do I truly have to explain this to you again, human?"

"Loki..." she warned.

"I am Prince Loki to you," he growled. "I am your superior. Why are you what I need? Who crafted this—this humiliation?"

Yeah, this had been a bad idea. A really bad idea. She needed to get out of this dream. But before she woke up...Jane stood and held her left arm out, the rune mark plainly visible. "You did. You 'crafted this humiliation,' Prince Loki. This was all your idea. And for being so superior, you're pretty stupid. I'm the only thing that takes away your pain? Really? Then you'd best stop causing me so much of it." Jane headed for the door, reciting, "This is a dream. I will wake up when I count to five—"

"Jane!"

Without turning around, she answered, "It's Dr. Foster to you. Five, four, three, two, one."

oooOOOooo

Day 231

Boulder, Colorado

She hated him. This was the fuel that got her exhausted body through a day spent grocery shopping, doing laundry, sorting, and researching, before collapsing into bed.

I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

oooOOOooo

The second Jane closed her eyes, she found herself in an vast marble hallway, the ornately carved door to Loki's chambers in front of her.

I hate him.

She slid to the ground, knowing she should wake herself up but desperate for sleep. A tear slowly tracked down her cheek.

I hate him.

Footsteps resounded through the passageway. Jane squeezed her eyes shut and covered her head in a defensive posture, unable to face her antagonist. The steps stopped in front of her. Jane refused to look up. She hated appearing weak, but she hated him more. After a long pause, the owner of the footsteps walked away. She waited another while, then opened her eyes. A folded paper lay by her feet. Jane unfolded the note and read the spidery script:

Dr. Foster: If you would do me the great honor of sitting with me for a while, I promise that I will do you the honor of ignoring you completely. Yours, Loki

Loki didn't think that was an apology, did he? Did he think that she would just run to him like some lap dog at the promise of a treat? He was clever, though. It was tempting: to be warm and comfortable and not to have to deal with his razor tongue. But he would just find another way to demean her. It wasn't worth it.

Jane had always prided herself on avoiding the toxic relationships in which so many of her school friends and colleagues found themselves trapped. She was a woman of science first, emotions second. She didn't need a man to complete her—she was already whole. Few men held her interest or met her rigorous standards. The handful of romantic relationships she had allowed herself had all ended when she felt pressured to lessen herself to keep the man's interest. Even her attempt at marriage had failed the moment Don tried to take credit for some of her work, assuming that a good little wife would support her husband no matter what. The system worked for her; kept her strong and protected.

Until the Asgardian gods invaded and scrambled her brains.

Now, despite being so careful for so many years, despite saying no to plenty of great guys, despite steeling herself time after time to do what was best for her, not what she wanted—despite all this, here she sat. Trapped in some sort of weird bond with a man—alien—who was manipulative, untrustworthy, and emotionally abusive. At best. It was costing her all that she held dear.

There wasn't a single thing she could do about it. And worst of all? A very small part of her still wanted him. She had become one of those women she'd always pitied.

Alie shifted, probably protesting Jane's hunched position. She straightened her back, rubbed her belly, and remembered that she wasn't responsible just for herself, but for another life. Pathetic woman or not, she needed to keep her strength up for her baby.

Jane slowly, ungracefully got to her feet. Listen, Foster. We're going to go in there because a warm, rested mama is what is best for Alie. We are not going to let him push our buttons this time. She squared her shoulders, put on her best poker face, pushed open the door, and padded around the brightly burning fireplace.

There sat the dark Odinson—Laufeyson?—arms tightly crossed over his chest, scowling into the fire.

Jane sank into the empty chair and found a second note next to the tea tray: Please feel free to help yourself. The tea is excellent.

True to Loki's word, he gave no indication that he was aware of her. But soon after she settled into the armchair, sipping a mug of what was, indeed, delicious tea, a low moan of relief escaped him. Jane sat in silence, soaking up the warmth of the fire, absorbed in her thoughts (Is this wrong? Am I enabling him? How can I take physical comfort from being with such an evil person? I hate him) until she slid into a deeper, dreamless sleep.

oooOOOooo

Day 232

Boulder, Colorado

"Black Canyon Motel; how can I help you?"

"Good morning. How close to the National Park are you?"

"Let's see. We're about twenty minutes from the South Rim Visitor Center. That's the only thing open this time of year."

"Great. I'd like to make a reservation, please."

oooOOOooo

Shall we do this again, Dr. Foster? Jane took the note off the door and stepped over the threshold into the stone chamber. She headed directly for the overstuffed armchair, not sparing her companion a glance. This was merely a mutually beneficial arrangement, nothing more. She was ensuring her own well-being and by extension the well-being of her unborn baby. Jane didn't relax until she heard Loki's sigh of relief.

oooOOOooo

Day 233

Boulder, Colorado

The new phone rang. Jane groped for it, unsure of where she was. She blinked at the screen. 9:46 a.m. She had slept until 9:46. The phone continued to ring. Finally, she swiped the screen and picked it up, voice hoarse from sleep.

"Hello?"

"Jane? Is that you?"

Jane breathed out and recited the second passphrase. "Of course it's me, Aunt Betty. Don't you recognize my voice?"

"Well, you know me. Always forgetful."

"It's good to hear from you."

"We have a place for you to rent. Are you ready to move?"

Was she ready? Her mind spun. She just woke up. How could she make a decision like this?

"Can I think about it and let you know?"

"I'm afraid not, honey. We have other interested parties."

Darcy. Erik. Puente Antiguo. Isabel. SHIELD. JDEF. Agent Malone. Thor. The Tesseract. Loki.

Loki.

She had to do this.

"Yes, I'm ready to move."

"Aunt Betty" said, "Glad to hear it. Here's what's next..."

oooOOOooo

"Hello, Ms. Foster. How can I help you?"

"Hello. I just wanted to let you know I'll be checking out tomorrow."

"I'll make a note. Thank you."

oooOOOooo

Come in, read the note. Jane headed for her little leather refuge, then stopped short. Loki was in his usual place, but the military uniform had been replaced by Kai's simpler black outfit. Instead of the tightly wound position he'd taken the last two nights, he was carelessly sprawled out, his mile-long legs stretched out toward the fire. His eyes were closed, one arm tucked behind his head and the other flung wide, fingertips grazing the arm of her chair.

This wasn't fair. The outfit, his relaxed—even intimate—posture, the room itself: the memories were overwhelming. She hated him, but Jane fought the urge to comb her fingers through his hair, to smooth the lines between his eyes. Oh, Kai, why did you have to be Loki?

For the millionth time, a pang of betrayal struck her heart. Get over it. So she snuggled into the warm cocoon and waited to hear the signal from Loki that the weird magic was working. He remained silent, though, and after counting to one hundred, Jane peeked over her shoulder.

He was staring at her under hooded lids, still lazily recumbent.

Shoving her unease aside, Jane looked away and curled up again. If he had something to say, he would say it. She didn't have anything to say to him.

Jane repeated that to herself until she had counted to two hundred. Then she peeked again.

Loki was still staring. Well. This was not ignoring her.

"This wasn't our agreement, Prince Loki," she said, keeping her back to him.

"No, it wasn't. But I'm not known for being a man of my word, am I?"

Jane would have left right then, but for the fact that his tone was self-deprecating, which was somewhat appealing. Careful, Jane.

He continued: "My physical discomfort is momentarily eased. My mind, however, torments me relentlessly. You are a woman who seeks knowledge, are you not? Surely you sympathize with my need to understand my apparent sudden dependence on a mortal female. What was it you said to me? 'We zero in on what we don't know and go after it'?"

Every cell of her body stood on high alert. She had said something similar to Kai. Did Loki remember?

"When..." her voice croaked; she cleared her throat and tried again. "When did I say that to you?"

"I don't know. Perhaps I simply imagined it. It seems like something Jane Foster would say, doesn't it?"

She didn't answer, swamped in unwanted emotions.

Loki went on in a low-pitched tone. "How did it come to pass that you are my panacea, and I yours?"

"You aren't my—"

"Come now, Dr. Foster," he interrupted. "Don't deny it; I've been watching you. How you arrive shivering, but soon calm in my presence. How the worry smoothes from your face. How you fall into true sleep. How you sigh and smile while you sleep. Aren't you curious? All prejudice aside, we do make an unlikely pair, wouldn't you agree?"

Jane was equally disturbed by the thought of Loki watching her while she slept and that he had referred to them as a pair. Carefully uncurling from her comfy position, she shifted to face the Asgardian prince—for Asgardian he was, whether or not he was Aesir. And he was a prince, lounging imperiously, the picture of indolence, save for the laserlike intensity of his gaze. He looked delicious. She hated him.

"We are a very unlikely pair," she agreed after she realized she'd been openly staring at him. "I'm not sure why you keep asking me how we ended up like this. How do you think a mere mortal like me could have arranged to trick you in this way? It's beyond my abilities, as I'm sure you would agree."

"And this is nothing I would ever desire, as I'm sure you would agree." (She hated him.) "So a third party is acting upon us. Who would benefit from throwing me into such a situation?"

"I'm sure I don't know. What I do know is that your rune is branded on my wrist. However improbable it may be, you and I are bonded, Prince Loki."

The air was suddenly electric. Loki didn't move a muscle, though his grinding frustration was plain. He bit out the words: "That mark cannot be authentic."

It was pointless to argue. Obviously, their memories had been repressed. Hers had been restored; his had not. "It's driving you crazy, isn't it?"

No answer.

Jane chuckled. "Join the club, mister. Every facet of my life is crazy right now."

"But this is imposs—"

"Do you like being able to have a coherent thought?"

Loki remained silent. She took that as an affirmative answer, glad that he had respected the warning in her voice, and continued, "Then let it go. Neither of us fully understands how we came to be each other's analgesic. But it is what it is, Prince."

"Don't call me Prince," he muttered. "It sounds ridiculous coming from your mouth."

The crackling of the fire had a soporific effect, making the cavernous stone chamber cozy. Jane rested her head on the side of the chair, relishing this bizarre respite.

They sat quietly for so long that she thought he had decided to drop the issue. Then he asked, "Doesn't it...distress...you to be associated with me?"

Jane hesitated, then answered honestly. "Yes."

Another long pause. "Why, then, are you willing to tolerate this?"

What did he expect her to say? What did he want her to say? What was the truth?

"I haven't found a way out yet." She slid her hands to cradle her belly. "And I have someone else to take care of."

His gaze followed her hands, brow creased in bewilderment. Slowly, he scanned her body as though mapping its topography. Jane wanted to turn away, to hide Alie from this examination. But she forced herself to remain still. Maybe some shred of Kai still survived.

After what felt like an eternity, however, Jane watched as his expression cleared to blank. He shrugged and closed his eyes. "Surely the strain of all this nonsense isn't good for the child." His tone conveyed his skepticism. "How is my dear brother, by the way?"

She needed rest this night, so Jane simply turned her back on him and stayed where she was. And hated herself for it.

oooOOOooo

Day 234

Boulder, Colorado

Just a handful of files left to copy. Jane plugged one end of the USB cord into her laptop and the other into her new phone. A few keystrokes later, the machines were busy talking with each other.

Her suitcases stood by the door, the fridge was empty, the towel were neatly piled on the bathroom floor. It was moving day. Jane was not allowing herself to think about it.

oooOOOooo

"Look for the rusty, muddy SUV," "Aunt Betty" had said. There it was. Jane pulled the Corolla into a short driveway behind the other vehicle. She double-checked the address, then got out of the car, taking only her backpack with her.

The house was modest, a nice ranch painted neutral tones. Jane rang the doorbell. A tall, burly man answered; the stereotypical Colorado neo-hippie, with a full beard and a t-shirt with Mickey Mouse on it.

"Yes?" he said, adjusting his glasses.

"Hello, I'm Jane Foster," she said, "Aunt Betty sent me to see the house."

"Nice to meet you, Jane Foster. We've been expecting you. Please come in."

Jane stepped inside the house and looked around. The entryway led to a spacious living room. To the right, a dining room formed an L with the living room. To the left was a hallway that Jane presumed led to bedrooms and bathrooms. The house was furnished with a bare minimum of furniture, just a couch and an old dining table with chairs.

"Hi, Jane." A petite woman with a red pixie cut, dressed in an oversized sweater and leggings, walked through the dining room and smiled. "Are you ready?"

"No," Jane said honestly. "But it's time." She gestured to her midsection. "I can't keep this a secret much longer."

The woman nodded. "Cousin Fred in Albuquerque recommended that we help you out. We don't normally deal with domestic abuse situations. Our field is more...political. But Fred is a good guy. If he says Jane Foster needs to disappear, then Jane Foster will disappear."

Jane swallowed the lump threatening to clog her throat. "So...Aunt Betty, Uncle Frank, Cousin Fred...what do I call you two? Granny and Jethro?"

The man chuckled. "She's Carol and I'm Tim."

"Burnett and Conway?"

He laughed harder. "You're a smart one."

Carol rolled her eyes. "Clock's ticking, guys. Let's get started."

oooOOOooo

"How do I look?" Carol turned in a slow circle, arms held away from her body.

Tim nodded. "Good."

Jane just stared. With a long, dark wig and an exchange of clothes, Carol now looked eerily like her. Which was the point.

"All right. I need to hit the road in case anyone is watching. Jane has already been here for half an hour, which is plenty of time to look at a possible rental house." Carol turned to face her. "Jane? Are you still with me?"

A spasm of grief grabbed her heart. That might be the last time anyone ever called her by her real name.

"Yeah, I'm with you. Sorry," she said, shaking her head. "Just lost in thought."

"This isn't easy," Carol said sympathetically. "We understand. Tim and I—we've both been through tough stuff." She picked up Jane's bag, grabbed Jane's coat, and squeezed Jane's shoulder. "You've already done a good job of visiting shops and restaurants around this area. People will remember the cute scientist who's going to work at ESRL. I'll head toward Black Canyon and check in at that hotel. It should be enough to visit the park ranger's office and ask some questions about where to watch the stars. I'll make sure he sees the Toyota. He'll remember me—you. If I have any questions, I'll route them through Tim. Your job is to vanish now."

Jane nodded numbly.

"Jane Foster" walked out the door, got into her car, and drove off.

I've already said goodbye to my life. How is it possible that I am saying goodbye to myself? And who am I saying hello to?

Carol had given her another manila envelope. A Canadian passport announced that her name was Sarah Jean Wilson. Her new name. A different identity. There were keys to a different house, a different car. A suitcase with different clothes. Nothing, no one, nowhere was familiar. Everything would now be fake. She'd be pretending for the rest of her life.

Instinctively, she reached for the rune brand. Stroking the lines slowed her heart rate, but did nothing to soothe the pain. Even this mark was counterfeit, the bond secured under false pretences.

A gentle touch on her back made her jump. She whirled around. Tim stood with his hands up in the "I'm not going to harm you" pose.

"We just have a couple of hours, Sarah. Could we continue?"

"You're not going to call me Jane anymore, are you?"

He smiled in sympathy. "Jane just left."

"Yeah," she said. "Okay. What's next?"

"You become Sarah Wilson."

oooOOOooo

"Welcome to United Airlines flight 829 nonstop service to Vancouver, British Columbia. All passengers may board at this time."

oooOOOooo

"Welcome home, Ms. Wilson."

"Thank you."

oooOOOooo

"Can I help you, miss?"

"Um, yeah. I left my car here in long-term parking and now I can't remember which aisle it was in."

"Happens all the time, miss. What's the make and model?"

"It's a Honda CR-V. Silver."

The attendant chuckled. "I've got a dozen of those in the lot right now. It's a popular car. We'll find yours."

oooOOOooo

Jane squinted her eyes in the dark. The GPS said to turn left, but she could only make out trees. There—a narrow dirt driveway pushed a space between two of the tall evergreens. The CR-V slowly rolled down the wooded path. A quarter mile in, the headlights revealed a clearing and a slightly shabby Victorian farmhouse. Home sweet home.

oooOOOooo

The house was less shabby on the inside. As Tim had promised, everything she needed was already there. Furniture, pots and pans, towels. Even the fridge and cupboards were stocked. Someone had gone to significant lengths to take care of her. It should have been comforting. She should have felt safe.

Instead, she jumped every time she caught a glimpse of her reflection. Who was this woman in the baggy sweater with short red hair? She was a stranger in her own skin.

oooOOOooo

I can't face him tonight.

In the end, she didn't have to. Jane didn't sleep at all.

A/N: It's come to my attention that perhaps I was a bit too cryptic about the star gazing site. It wasn't meant to be a mystery, so I've added a small edit to chapter 25. The Black Canyon of the Gunnison National Park is where Malone finds Jane's car and backpack.