Chapter 2: Why is this happening?


"Five years? This isn't funny, Professor. If this is some kind of sick joke, I'll forgive you, but please stop pretending." Hermione was still clutching the blanket and her knuckles had started to turn white.

Snape sighed and went to the wardrobe in front of the bed. He grabbed a longsleeve and some trousers, as well as some underwear and silently handed it to Hermione. The pain in his eyes was unlike anything she had seen before. Sure, he had been in a bad mood before, but this was as though he was truly showing her his emotions. The old dungeon bat had always been so cold. Never letting anyone come close to him. Rarely talking to other people out of his own free will and certainly not showing emotions like hurt or compassion.

"I wish this was a joke.", he finally said and pointed to the door on his left. "The bathroom is through this door. Get dressed. I'm going to cancel my classes. We need to see Poppy. Maybe she has an idea, why you lost your memories."

He was starting to move to the other door, when she grabbed his arm. "You are not going to leave without answers! I want to know what is going on!" There was anger in her voice, as well as desperation. "Why were we sharing a bed and why are you so nice to me? …Are we a couple?" The last question came out more reluctant than demanding. Hermione wasn't stupid. She was able to put one and one together. But she also didn't want to assume anything. That's why she needed to hear him say it. At the moment it was just a thought and maybe she was wrong. Maybe they really had had a one-night stand and maybe these where her quarters. That would explain why female clothing had been in the wardrobe. After all she still couldn't fathom why she would have started some kind of relationship with her potions professor. That thought had never even crossed her mind. After all he was so much older than her, always treating her like a child and never acknowledging her intelligent mind.

Snape let out a breath he had apparently been holding. He looked very uncomfortable now. It seemed as though he did not want to answer this question. In his dark eyes she could see a battle. The question was, who was losing it?

"Alright, I will tell you. But…please bear in mind that your memories are gone and therefore your feelings are as well." He nervously scratched his neck und Hermione couldn't help feeling anxious. Why was he making such a mystery out of it? She just wanted to finally know what was going on.

"We are married.", he said in one quick breath.

Her jaw dropped when her brain finally registered what he had said. This was ridiculous. Simply ridiculous. There was no way in hell- Her gaze fell to her hand, were a golden wedding band rested on her ring finger.

"We are married.", she repeated breathless and her brain tried to comprehend that thought, but seemed stuck somehow. Hermione felt goosebumbs starting to cover her skin. She couldn't react to his words right now. This morning was a freaking nightmare!

Suddenly she started to feel sick. Her panic was clearly ruling over her body right now and it made her want to vomit. Pulling up the blanket, so she wouldn't stumble over it, she made her way to the bathroom and simply threw the door open. Needing only seconds to take everything in, she dropped her clothes to the floor and opened the toilet to get rid of her stomachs content. Fortunately there wasn't much there to vomit. Still the bitter taste of bile filled her mouth and afterwards she immediately went to the faucet to clear her mouth with some fresh water.

Breathe. She told herself and stood back up again. The large mirror in front of her was no help to ease her nervousness. She looked diffent. Definetly. She couldn't tell if she liked this older version of herself better or not, but she clearly saw, that she had changed. Letting her gaze drift she saw the door still standing open and Professor Snape standing in the doorway with a concerned look on his face.

"Do you still feel sick? I can give you a potion to ease your stomach.", he offered and Hermione raised an eyebrow at him. "It seems to me as though I'd need something to relax. This is more stress than I can seem to handle at the moment."

Her breathing was still a bit uncontrolled, but she started to feel less nervous. Maybe she would soon regain her memories and then she would surely think better of this whole situation. Hopefully.

"I don't intent to make you feel even more uncomfortable, but there is something else you need to know." Snapes gaze lingered on her and she braced herself for the next blow to come. What was it this time?

He seemed pained and not willing to give this information away. Maybe because he knew would only add to her confusion. "You… are pregnant." He waited for her reaction. Probably expecting her to faint or something. Instead Hermione was standing frozen, unaware of the tears forming in her eyes and running down her cheeks. Snape saw her crying and attempted to come closer, but stopped his approach, when she held her hand out.

"Please… just leave me for a bit.", she choked out. Unsure he eyed her, but eventually nodded and closed the door.

When she was alone, she finally let the blanket fall of her body and her eyes set on her belly. She wasn't showing yet. At least not much. Slowly she walked in front of the full length mirror and examined herself. She definitely had a bumb. Third month, she assumed. Her body still looked familiar. More womanly now. Her breasts seemed bigger, her hips rounder. Her hair was longer, just like she had thought. All in all, she still looked the same… but different.

And now she was what? 24 or 25, married to her potions professor, carrying his child… the thought made her feel sick again. There was no way, she could have imagined this. If someone had told her beforehand this was going to happen, she would have laughed at them.

Slowly realising she should still get dressed, she hopped into the shower quickly. She wasn't going to wash her hair, but she felt as though she needed the warm water now. Her body felt numb and even the warmth of the water needed time to reach her core.

After five minutes of crying and letting the warm water sooth her, she got back out again and quickly dried off. Throwing on the clothes Snape had given her, she had to admit they were nice and she would have chosen them for herself. One last check in the mirror and she ready to go.

Snape already waited for her, when she came out. He was dressed in black attire, but it wasn't his usual outfit. This one wasn't so boring and made him look a bit younger.

"Poppy knows we are coming.", he said. "Did you… are you feeling a bit better?" The concern in his voice was something Hermione hadn't gotten used to yet.

"I just want this to be over.", she answered truthfully. The whole situation was too much for her. She didn't like it one bit.

Snape nodded understanding and motioned for her to lead the way, which she did.

Once they arrived at the Hospital Wing Poppy immediately went to work. Hermione answered all kinds of questions und Poppy ran serveral tests to find out what had happened to the young witch. After two hours without any kind of result, Poppy returned to Hermione and Snape and sadly shook her head.

"I fear I can't detect what is wrong with you, my dear. You aren't sick, nobody cursed you or put any kind of magical illness on you. So far I have no idea. But don't you worry. I'll contact some other healers and ask them for their opinion on this. Also… you will be pleased to hear that the baby is just fine." Poppy smiled at the couple and then left them to themselves.

"Pity.", Snape said as they walked back to the dungeons. He sounded as defeated as Hermione felt. She could tell he had hoped for her to regain her memories and was just as frustrated as her.

"What now?", she asked. Her voice was but a rasp. She felt as though she needed to sleep. All her energy had gone into crying and waiting patiently for the test results. Maybe if she just had a little nap…

"I could extract my memories, show them to you. It's not the same as experiencing it yourself, but maybe it could trigger something.", he suggested.

Hermione sighed. It was kind of him to want to try. But she wasn't sure how much she could take in. Her mind already felt like a wobbly mess. No need to make it worse.

"I don't know if I'm ready for this, yet.", she said and rubbed her eyes.

"If you don't mind I will head to bed again when we arrive at home."

Professor Snape gave her a small smile, which she had never seen on him before and nodded.

"Sure, take your time. This must be overwhelming." His voice was deep, but soft. He truly cared for her. Hermione didn't know whether this was annoying or nice. At the moment she simply didn't feel anything for him. Other than respect of course. Since he had been her teacher, it felt weird to think of him as a normal person with human needs and relationships. But she had apparently married him and was expecting. Deciding she didn't want to start imagining herself having sex with him, she let it go and focussed on her current task. Finding a way to retrieve her memories. Though she had to admit, at the moment she didn't find this task appealing, it would be worse not to regain her memory. For then she would be stuck in a loveless marriage, raising a child she hadn't wanted in the first place. Not a bright future.


This is such a depressing chapter, but just so you know: I'm planning on making this a slow burn story. So be aware!

Hope you like it so far.

AC