A/N: While Carlota is busy buying better form-fitting clothes for her cousin, let's shift things back to the other side of the coin. I don't expect too much about this chapter, but my mind can come up with whatever seems relevant when I'm writing, so we'll see.

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING from the Loud House.

The bell chimed at Royal Woods Middle School, although not a soul was present on the grounds surrounding the new building. Seconds later though, the front doors were kicked open as what remained of the student body exited the facility, some of which expressing their relief at the end of their suffering. One particular group of boys shuffled their way out of the building, all of them fixated on starting their summer vacations early.

"Thank GOD it's finally over..." Rusty groaned, idly thumbing through his phone.

"Anyone else thinking about skipping the rest of the week? I'm not sitting on my ass for doing nothing for another six hours." Conner stated, hooking his thumbs on the entrance of his pockets.

"I would, if I can convince me Ma to let me." Liam replied in a dejected tone. "She says education is important, but I'd rather watch paint dry than stay in that hellhole if I ain't doin' squat. Pardon mah language."

"You ever find it weird how our teachers and parents don't like us dropping swears, yet we see other kids doing it anyway?" Zach asked out of curiosity, blankly staring up at the sky.

"It's just a thing about respect. Me Pa nearly tanned mah hide when I let one loose after steppin' on the business end of a rake while I was carryin' the eggs." The farm boy stated, the foot in question having its toes curled instinctively at the memory.

"I hope you got shots for that." Clyde chimed in. "Who knows what that thing's been used for."

Liam waved a hand dismissively. "Ah, it was nothin' a good foot rub couldn't fix. Didn't break the skin either."

"It would've been funny it you ended up making the handle smack you in the face." The only blonde of the group chuckled. "Like in those cartoons back in the day."

Liam rolled his eyes. "Last thing ah need is 'nother gap in mah teeth."

"You're lucky then. My dad's already thinking about getting me braces." Rusty shuddered at that last word. "Do these perfect teeth even look like they need to be caged?" His lips parted to show his teeth.

Zach gave the tall boy a half-lidded stare whilst idly scanning his 'smile bones'. "Uh, yeah? I can see a few of them being off-center from a mile away. And when was the last time you brushed?"

Rusty pouted a little. "This morning." He put a hand to his face and let out a short breath, the look of disgust becoming more apparent as the stench filled his nose. "Should've snuck off school to get some real food during lunch...Margo isn't gonna want any later if I don't brush..."

"I thought elementary school food was worse, but middle school..." Conner shook his head. "Is half that stuff even cooked?"

"All school food is bad." Clyde stated, a smile gracing his face. "That's why my dads still pack me a lunch. Plus, some of that stuff is just flat out unhealthy. Remember how Stella got sick because of the green beans she ate?"

"And her ma was threatenin' to sue the school?" Liam gave a curt laugh. "Those were the days. Still wish I saw the principal's face when the Super Intendent came over here and chewed 'em out."

"Honestly, I kinda miss Huggins." Conner smirked as he thought about the former K-8 school. "He was boring as hell," He shrugged. "But at least he knew what he was doing."

Clyde shook his head. "That's not what I heard from Haiku when he used to run the book club. He was so much of a 'Follow the Rules' type of guy that it basically ruined any kind of fun they would've had."

Conner raised a brow. A faint memory came to the forefront of his mind as he recalled Lincoln mentioning that same club some time last year. "Hey Link, isn't your sister in that club?" He didn't get an immediate response, prompting him to glance back. "Lincoln?"

The other boys turned to notice their white-haired friend was significantly lagging behind, his face a little dull as he stared up at the clouds. Before anyone could grab his attention, Rusty's phone started to ring.

The tall redhead smiled upon seeing a certain someone's face appear on the caller ID. With a swift tap to the screen, he put it up to his ear. "Hello gorgeous, you've reached yours truly." He spoke in a sultry tone. He remained silent for a moment as the boys could hear a voice on the line. "Yeah, I totally got time. When do ya wanna hang?" Rusty pulled the phone away for a second to glance at the mobile's clock. "Sounds good babe. See ya then." Pocketing this phone, "Sorry Ladies, but this guy's-" He pointed to himself. "Gotta get ready for his date tonight."

Rusty parted from the group with a bit of a dance to his step, humming to himself in confidence.

"No matter how many times I see it, it's still weird that he actually has a girlfriend." Zach stated once he was certain Rusty was far enough away.

"At least he's not saying he has one, only for it to be a ruse." The farmboy nodded in agreement.

Clyde snorted a little. "And with Margo no less. I still don't know what she saw in him."

Conner formed a cheesy grin. "I can think of a few-HKK!" He was cut off when Lincoln bumped into him, forcing the Pingry boy to stumble forward while the impact itself promptly knocked the Loud off his thought train.

"Oh, sorry!" Lincoln said quickly.

"Geez dude, what's with you being braindead?" The blonde asked in an irate tone.

"Just..." Lincoln gave himself a moment of pause. "Thinking about some stuff..."

"If it's about Ronnie Anne, we get it." Clyde spoke in an even tone. "She's really far away and you can only see her at certain times of the year." He paused before muttering, "For the twentieth time you've told me..."

"Ain't she comin' down next week?" The farm boy asked.

Lincoln nodded. "End of the week," He clarified, "But it's something else I'm droning on about..."

"Liiiiike?" Zach asked.

The Loud stuffed his hands into his pockets. "...She's still a few years off from moving back..."

The boys gave a collective hum of understanding. After Ronnie moved away, there was some doubt as to whether Lincoln and the Santiago could maintain their newfound relationship in spite of being 200 miles apart. Like Ronnie Anne, Lincoln was well aware of the painful amount of planning that would be required to make a visit in advance, especially since free rides were very limited after Lori moved away; bus and train tickets were always an option, but certainly not the best from a financial perspective. But Lincoln weathered the storm, even if it took a chunk out of his allowance; and it was this level of commitment that had the boys backing Lincoln at every turn.

"She say how long?" Conner asked out of curiosity.

Lincoln grimaced a little. "About the time we're seniors in high school from what she guessed..."

"Well that ain't far." Liam stated. "Already finishing up 7th grade, and we start 8th in a couple months after all the fun stuff is over." He shoved his hands in the lower pockets of his overalls. "Don't know about you fellers, but these years are goin' by quick."

Zach nodded. "Yeah, so what's a few years gonna do?"

Lincoln gave a dry laugh. "That's what Lynn said last night, and she's still hasn't gotten over what happened two years ago..."

Clyde stiffened a little at this. Even today, he was the only other person aside from Lincoln that fully understood what the former jock was going through. Others, including Conner, just assumed it was a moment where her pride was shattered; who wouldn't be mellow after getting their ass stomped into the ground? But even so, there was a lot more under the surface that stretched deeper than Lincoln's troubling relationship.

"To be fair Lincoln," The African American started, "Lynn's problem is much different from yours. I mean, if you and Ronnie Anne can hold out for a little longer, then it shouldn't be a problem. Lynn on the other hand," He paused as he recalled their last discussion. "She could use a serious confidence boost. Though now, I think both of you could in the grand scheme of things..."

Lincoln sighed inwardly. "I guess..."

"Shoot." Liam smiled. "If you need a confidence boost, puttin' a little hair on yer chest ought to do the trick."

Zach sent an unamused stare towards the farm boy. "How's gluing hair to himself gonna help?"

Conner slapped his forehead. "That's not what it means idiot..."

Liam was about to give a retort to Zach's misinterpretation, but his phone buzzed for a few seconds. He stuck a few fingers into his breast pocket and pulled it out, taking only a few seconds to look at the screen before giving a sigh. "Welp, I gotta run. One of the goats got loose again, and I gotta help mah sister ring 'em in." He started down the sidewalk. "Catch y'all tomorrow! Or whenever!"

Zach shrugged. "Welp, that Xbox isn't gonna play itself." The short redhead walked across the street.

Conner snorted. "He's still behind everyone else in the game." Like those before him, the Pingry's phone chimed to indicate an incoming text. It only took a few seconds of eyeballing before the 14 year old rolled his vision sacks. "I'm out. Cassy's starting to worry again. We're still doing a game session tonight right?"

"Yeah." Lincoln replied, a light grin forming on his lips. "Just don't throw a fit about how many times the COV keep shooting rockets at you."

"Pfff. I'm still valid in the fact that, for some stupid reason, the devs couldn't just give some of them LMGs. And most of the rockets do radiation damage." Conner turned down the street, thumbing a reply to his sister.

[Heading home still. Keep your shirt on...]

With the two of them alone, Clyde addressed his friend in a more concerned tone. "So what's really on your mind Lincoln? If it was just about Ronnie Anne, then you wouldn't have been spacing out all day."

"Yeah, it's not just Ronalda." Lincoln stared Clyde in the eye. "It's Lynn too..."

"I figured..." Clyde muttered under his breath.

"I'm pretty sure she told you about how she's growing interested in sports again, right?" Clyde nodded, to which Lincoln folded his arms. "Then I'm pretty sure you saw how torn up she feels just thinking about it. I mean, I've caught her watching whatever games happened to be on TV with this sad look in her eye...she wants to take them up again, but she's hurting herself by holding back..."

"It's not that easy Lincoln." Clyde interjected. "She's worried she might become the same person that started the whole 'bad luck' incident." The nerdy teen glanced to the side. "If it was as bad as you guys said it was, then I can see why she'd be worried."

Lincoln furrowed his brows a little. "But she's not going to get like that..."

Clyde raised a brow. "How do you know?"

"Because I've known Lynn ever since I've been in diapers." Lincoln spoke with an air of certainty. "I know that being on the competitive side of things made her cocky, but she wasn't always like that..." Looking up at the clouds, "When we were younger, Lynn was pretty playful and probably a little overprotective of me. Sometimes when we played games with each other, it always in good fun and it didn't matter to her whether she won or lost. Not sure if I'm right on this," Lincoln looked back at Clyde. "But I think over time, constantly doing all those sports made Lynn focus too much on winning instead of enjoying herself." He glanced to the side. "Annnnd probably being around Lucy made her start some gross habits like holding in her crap until she won."

Clyde cringed a little. "She told me that, but I didn't want to believe it..."

"But what I'm saying is, Lynn can still do sports. She just has to remember to have fun." Lincoln pointed out. "Sports was pretty much her life, or at least a big part of it. I wasn't sure if she'd really stop with sports after we made up, but she won't even touch a jersey and threw out all the ones she had. That's like Leni giving up fashion or Lucy becoming less of an emo."

The African American nodded. "Ok, but like I said: Lynn's gonna need a lot of support if she wants to take that up again; and I'm not sure if us just talking to her is enough." He rapped his fingers on his arm. "I may not be Dr. Lopez, but this just seems like something Lynn has to do on her own."

Lincoln released a sigh. "That's why I'm worried..." A pregnant pause filled the air between them before the Loud continued. "When Lynn used to get...competitive...she doesn't hold back and goes all in. If you've ever played a board game with her, all it'd take is one game before you'd be done with it."

Clyde couldn't help the small grin that worked its way out. "Least I know why you had 'Loser' shaved on your head."

The Loud glowered a little. "At least she apologized for that..." Pursing his lips for a moment, "She said we could be even if I did the same to her, but I didn't do it since it was a while ago. But back to my point: Lynn isn't gonna push herself because being so fierce about any competition is what made her act like a bitch. Buuuut," Lincoln started to smile. "I believe I know someone who can encourage her to take up her passion again."

Clyde raised a brow. "Who? Ronnie Anne?"

"Close, but I meant you Clyde." The white-haired teen patted his friend's arm. "Ronnie Anne is like a twin sister to Lynn, so she'll definitely be a part of this; but you've been acting as Lynn's therapist ever since she started dealing with this..." He his eyelids narrowed as he tried to find the right words. "Second personality of hers." He frowned a little. "I really hoped she would've quit it by now, and I can tell Mom and Dad are still thinking of making her see a real shrink; but I doubt that'd help."

"I'm trying my best Lincoln. I mean, if I could, I'd go inside her head and yank out whatever bad thoughts she has. And-" Clyde paused for a moment. "Wait, that sounds like something Lisa might do."

Lincoln gave a light chuckle. "She did try that once, but canned the whole project because it caused the animals she tested it on to go crazy."

"Well..." Clyde scratched his growing facial hair. "If you think I have a better shot at helping her, then I'll try. I just hope she doesn't think I'm trying to ask her out-" He cut himself off immediately upon realizing what he just said. "I-I mean, not that I wouldn't want her to. No, wait wait wait! That came out wrong! She's a cool person and I could hang out with her, and-"

The Loud snorted a little as the nerdy teen's cheeks were growing red. "I get it Clyde. Just try not to get in over your head, Romeo."

"Riiiiiight." Clyde gave a shaky laugh. Thankfully, his phone started to buzz in his pocket, drawing him away from the awkwardness he felt. "My dads are waiting for me to get home so we can go out for dinner." He extended a fist towards Lincoln. "See ya later bro."

Lincoln pounded the fist with his own. "You too, bro."

With Clyde taking off towards his own home, Lincoln walked in the direction of his. He glanced up at the sky as he picked up where he left off in his train of thought. You'd think two years wouldn't change much of anything; well, besides Ronnie Anne and Bobby moving away almost a couple years back. But it was still a little shocking how large his social circle had become. Conner started to hang with the boys around the end of 5th grade out of circumstance, eventually warming up enough to everyone to be considered a full friend. This also wound up with the Pingry boy butting heads with Clyde, who feared the former was going to take over the latter's position as Lincoln's best friend. Truth to be told, Lincoln did consider Conner a good friend that didn't have as many issues as Clyde did'; but he had known Clyde since they were six, and their ties ran deep.

Next, there was Stella: a new girl of Filipino descent who had joined Lincoln's class during sixth grade. Being the geeks and losers that they were, it was very surprising how someone as pretty as Stella wanted to hang with the boys. Naturally, they thought their had to be some underlying reason because no girl in their own class (or school for that matter) wanted to be around them due to being at the bottom of the popularity pool. Well, that wasn't so much the case for Lincoln and Clyde due to a certain fight they got involved in while in 5th grade; but they weren't going to ditch their 4 friends at any point if they could help it. Anyway, because Stella seemed so adamant at wanting to hang with them, their growing (and somewhat perverted) minds entertained the idea she wanted to date one of them. Lincoln shot this idea down due to already being smitten, with Conner following suit because he and Cristina had become rather close. But both boys would be quick to admit it was funny watching their friends try to win Stella's heart before she made it clear she only saw them as cool guys to hang with and wasn't interested in relationships. Apologies aside, Stella proved to be a cool person to hang with.

That didn't stop her from being targeted by a certain Latina for passing a few flirts to Lincoln. Few knew that Stella could be such a troll, and she honestly thought a few innocuous teases would amuse her due to getting a rise out of Ronalda. The Filipina is still fortunate she dodged a chair thrown at her head.

And speaking of girls, Cristina also joined their little clique; courtesy of Conner. There was an air of awkwardness between Lincoln and the brunette due to the former's previous infatuation for the latter; that went double for Ronalda for a few other reasons. Because of this, it took roughly two weeks before Cristina truly felt like she achieved the friendship of everyone else; Ronalda warmed up to her when it became clear Cristina had her sights on the only blonde of the group. The well-dressed girl really hit it off with Stella, often gossiping about girl topics that left the guys wondering what they were talking about or just ignoring it. Ronnie would occasionally join them, but it was very limited due to distance.

Last but not least, there was Jordan Rosato; also known as Girl Jordan. Possibly the third tomboy to join the group (she still held girly girl tendencies that rivaled Cristina's), it didn't come as a surprise when Jordan started hanging out with them more frequently. Rightfully popular due to the parties she held on occasion, you could say Jordan was the most influential girl in the school. She even gained the nickname 'Party Queen' as such events were often the most widely anticipated in any given year. Hey, someone had to fill the void after Chandler disappeared to who the hell cares.

You might ask how she's able to afford doing yearly parties, given that she's upper middle class at best. Jordan just pointed to her parents getting promoted to management positions in their jobs, so no one bothered pressing the question.

Over the past two years, Jordan had been getting more involved with the student government, often being the frontrunner to make talking points towards the faculty about what they could do to make the school better for students; one of them being evenly distributed A/C throughout the school. Seriously, in some rooms you have to wear two layers during summer, and winter felt like you were sitting in Phoenix during July.

Clearly the construction crew missed some objectives before they finished...

Being popular had its perks, and one of Jordan's best traits was that she didn't act like the world revolves around her or put down others simply because they were less fortunate. But being close friends with the next class president? Lincoln would tell you that opened a whole lot of doors.

Turning the corner, Lincoln eyed the street sign. "10 minutes til I open that door and Lily jumps me again." He bemused. The little girl had a habit of doing that to everyone, especially the sole Loud boy since he was the unspoken 'favorite'.

So, long story short, Lincoln's social group had grown in number, physically, and mentally. And that alone came with its own bag of worms as it didn't automatically mean maturity came with it. As people get older, they start to...notice...the opposite gender. Naturally, this involves a lot of hormonally-induced staring and the beginning of sexual fantasies. Having 4 girls in the group wasn't difficult to deal with, as the boys proved to be gentlemen for the most part; but they wouldn't be men if they didn't admit they would occasionally give offhand stares at Stella and Jordan's chests, or Cristina and Ronalda's growing hips. Hell, Ronnie Anne outright boasted that she stares at Lincoln's butt half the time. The Loud could say the same to her with the way her shorts managed to-

Lincoln shook his head as his cheeks reddened a little. "Getting a little off base here..." He gave a smug smile. "I'll save that for later." The Loud spoke outwardly before glancing up at the sky. "Where was I?"

Oh, right. Rusty still remained the tallest of the group, had started to grow sideburns, and unfortunately...had a few more zits to add to his face. You could also say he became a little more perverted with his pickup lines being worse than ever, and on occasion, he'd profess his love for any random girl in their class that had a pretty face; everyone had to draw straws on who would slap him upside the head and drag him away by the ear. Usually, it was Stella or Liam; Lincoln pulled his hair once and Clyde just watched him get slapped so hard that Rusty had a handprint on his cheek for three whole days.

As funny as it was watching the tall redhead make a fool of himself, all of that changed when he accidentally used a cheesy line on Margo. Unlike every other girl he met, the long nosed brunette actually found it funny in spite of the fact Rusty clearly ripped it off from a movie. Many thought Margo was just giving him a shot out of pity, but it turns out the 15 year old sincerely took a liking to Rusty. It was still weird as to how it happened no matter how many times they saw it; Rusty probably thinks he hit the jackpot with how toned Margo was growing. Still, as long as he wasn't dropping stupid lines like a shitty comedian, no one complained. In fact, three of the guys had official girlfriends, Lincoln included.

The Loud bit his cheek as he furrowed his brows a little. In all honesty, he was a little jealous of Conner and Rusty. At least they could see their mates whenever they wanted to; Lincoln had to catch a damn travel bus and ride for three whole hours just to see his. And if his talk with Clyde was any indication, there might be a 4th couple in the group soon enough.

It wasn't that Zach or Liam weren't growing to be attractive. Liam was definitely getting some build from his usual farm labor, and the peach fuzz on his cheeks was obvious. Zach was likely to remain the shortest of the group, but their might be some hope for him later on, especially if he keeps his hair in check. But they weren't close to Lynn like Clyde was. From a distance, Lincoln would see how Lynn sometimes stared at his best friend whenever they hung out together, and Clyde would act all fidgety as he tried to put on this false sense of manliness. The fact the nerdy teen even fumbled on his words just moments ago made it clear to the white-haired child that he was reciprocating Lynn's growing feelings.

Lincoln smiled as he eyed his street just a block ahead. "Lynn could really use someone like Clyde in her life; especially now with her mind still a mess..." Looking at the readers, "Yeah, I know I laughed at the thought of Lynn dating Clyde when Ronnie Anne was moving away. I mean, who wouldn't? Clyde just doesn't seem like the type of guy Lynn would go out with." Reaching the corner, Lincoln looked both ways before crossing the street. "I thought she might date someone like that guy she was looking at during middle school when she used to do sports; but that didn't go anywhere. I still remember that day she came home looking completely drained because..." Lincoln looked at the clouds. "Francisco I think?" He gave a shrug. "Didn't like her back."

With his house in sight, Lincoln continued his narration. "But that was way back then. Lynn's changed a lot, and...well..." He stumbled on his words for a moment. "Clyde has a big heart, and while me and him are still considered geeks, I seriously doubt that Lynn would care. She could really use a kind guy like Clyde, and if he wants to date her, then I'd help them." The Loud chuckled to himself. "All those times my sisters tried setting me and Ronalda on a date, and here I am vowing to play matchmaker for my sister and best friend. I really am their brother."

"Lincoln?" A small, cutesy voice cut in, making the teen glance in the direction it came from. Lily was staring at him with a weird look while holding a pale in her hand. "Who are you talking to?"

The teen smiled. "Just running through some thoughts." He replied as he walked onto the grass. "What's with the bucket?"

Lily smiled brightly. "I'm gonna be digging for treasure!" The toddler boasted as she raised her pale. "Lana's helping, but she's behind the house digging with her hands. And, Mom said I'm not really allowed to do that." The little blonde pouted her lips. "I don't see why Lana gets to have fun while I have to use this stupid pale..." She softly slammed the plastic bucket into the soil.

Lincoln chuckled. "She said that because we don't need another Lana in the house." He knelt down to her level. "I mean, would you like being dirty all the time?"

Lily shook her head. "No. Lola says I will be as pretty as her one day."

The white-haired Loud rolled his eyes. "Of course she'd say that." He muttered.

"Wanna help? I think I'm gonna find a big, big treasure chest!" Lily spread her arms out to emphasize on the scale of her hopeful bounty.

"Sure, why not." Lincoln shrugged as he stood up. "Didn't have anything planned honestly."

Lily squealed in joy before grabbing her brother by his fingers and led him towards the backyard. As soon as they rounded the wooden frame however, the duo found a funny, and not-at-all weirdly sight. Lana was on her hands and knees, giving threatening growls with Charles responding in kind as they tugged back and forth with their teeth on a dirt-covered chew toy in the shape of a bone. A freshly dug hole was off to Lana's left, and her hands were coated in soil and mud. Yep, perfectly normal.

And if you were Lincoln, it was a headache.

The teen gave an exasperated sigh while Lily giggled loudly at the scene. "As if having one dog was enough..." Lincoln muttered as he let go of Lily's hand and strolled up to them.

The 8 year old mechanic and mutt were too busy in their little contest that they didn't even register Lincoln's presence until he reached down and yanked the toy from their mouths. The two barked angrily at him, yet the teen held an indifferent look toward the dog and child. Both jumped up on his legs in an attempt to reach the toy.

"Ah ah ah! Down!" Lincoln commanded in a tone he only reserved for times he wanted to be serious. His brows were furrowed a bit to show his determination and to test their obedience.

Charles' ears flattened against his head, knowing when an alpha was commanding him to stand down. He let loose a few whimpers as he backed off, standing up straight a moment later as he waited for his master's command. Lana on the other hand...

She continued reaching for the toy, forcing Lincoln to hold it higher. "I said, Down...Lana..." Lincoln spoke with a sharpened edge to his tone as he focused on the young mechanic.

Lana's eyes became wet as she gave a series of dog-like whimpers, sliding off her brother's pants leg and returning to her hands and knees, bowing slightly in obedience.

"Sit."

Charles and Lana obeyed without question, staring intently at the teen.

Lincoln dropped the faux sergeant attitude as a smile worked its way out. "Good boy." He dropped the toy, to which Charles gleefully took in his mouth. He shook it a few times with increased vigor before trotting off with what one could assume was a smug grin.

Lana glared at her brother. "No fair! I found that bone fair and square!"

The 13 year old frowned at his bug-loving sister. "And Charles buried it first Lana. It's not the first time you've taken his stuff."

"Aw come on!" Lana got to her feet. "I was just havin' fun!"

Lincoln didn't budge in his opinion as he folded his arms. "You really gotta stop acting like a dog Lana. It was cute a couple years ago, but you're almost 10 now. It even took you a whole year for Mom and Dad to get you to quit eating out of the garbage."

"Ewwwwwww!" Lily stuck her tongue out in disgust.

Lana's frown increased a little. "Don't knock it til you try it..."

"We're just looking out for you Lana." Lincoln started, letting his hands fall to his sides. "It was only a matter of time before you caught something that even Lisa probably couldn't fix. And after what happened a couple years ago, it's obvious Mom and Dad want to take their parenting seriously."

The 8 year old's frown dropped a bit, turning into a solemn stare as she looked towards the ground. "Yeah..." She spoke quietly, the memory of her brother's plight still fresh in her mind.

Being true to herself, Lana was a bit rebellious at having been forced to not eat garbage like a regular person. She didn't see the harm in having a little ol' molded pudding or cheese, or half-eaten chicken that someone was too lazy to finish. Time and time again, Rita or Lynn Sr. would have to remind the girl about why she shouldn't do it, having given her stern warnings but never actually moving onto a punishment; that's like trying to force Lana to stay clean, as slippery as she could be. After about three months of having to pick Lana out of the garbage, the parents finally decided to nip the problem in the bud...in the form of Lisa Loud.

Being forced to have hour long discussions with her brainy sister, Lana at first found the whole shindig to be a waste of time, shortly before Lisa told her of all the dangerous and deadly diseases Lana could catch that could cut her life short. The 5 year old even specifically pointed out why it was ill-advised to eat food discarded by others, to which Lisa pulled up various pictures of other humans who had eaten contaminated foodstuffs.

To cut it short, Lana turned into such a germaphobe that she wouldn't even empty her own trash can out of fear of catching a deadly virus. Fortunately, Lincoln and Lisa taught her simple sterilizing techniques; and this happened right as Lana was deciding if she wanted to live in a plastic bubble.

Lincoln knelt to her level. "I know you do it for fun Lans, but as you get older..." He trailed off, trying to figure out an appropriate word. "People start to think it's weird, and not in a good way. You can still do it around the house (unless Mom or Dad tell you not to), but try not to do it in public, kay?"

"Okaaay..." Lana replied, still feeling down in the dumps.

The teen reached out and ruffled the young tomboy's hair. "You're still my favorite little plumber."

"Hah hah." Lana chuckled, lightly grabbing her brother's wrist. "What about favorite sister?"

"Hmmmm..." Lincoln mulled in thought.

"Hey! I thought I was your favorite!" Lily yelled in protest, glaring daggers at Lana.

A smug grin formed across Lincoln's face. "Looks like you still have plenty of competition Lana." Lily pouted in response, even as Lincoln put his other hand on her head. "Haha, I'm just kidding Lily. All of you are my favorite!"

Lily perked up at this, promptly wrapping her arms around her brother as best she could. Lana joined in on the other side, covering Lily's arms with her own as she practically smothered herself against Lincoln's side. "Hug sandwich!"

Lincoln laughed as he hugged the two sisters. "Love you both."

"We love you more!" Lily proclaimed.

"Not as much as I do." Lincoln teased before releasing them. As he stood up, "I'm heading inside. And Lana..."

"Yeah?"

The teen let a chortle escape him. "Try not to dig up Charles' toys again."

Lana stuck her tongue out as she gave a mock salute. "No promises!"

Lincoln shook his head as he turned towards the house. "If he bites you, I'm not helping."

"People can bite too ya know!" Lana called after him as Lincoln reached the steps.

Lincoln wouldn't admit to it out loud (at least not in front of his other siblings), but he did have a favorite sister; she's currently living in the same apartment as his girlfriend's extended family. "I wonder how Lori's doing. Haven't called her in a while..." This lone thought played in his head as Lincoln opened the door.

The Loud was greeted to find his musical sister and her girlfriend sitting in the dining room with small stacks of paper sitting in front of them. A couple wads of balled-up paper was strewn this way and that around their position, some of which had ended up onto the floor.

"I swear mate, it's on the tip of my tongue, but it just feels like it doesn't have enough OMPH..." Lincoln heard Luna utter to herself.

"Just let it flow naturally hun." Sam replied, scratching the top of her head with the eraser of her pencil. "But I get you though: writing lyrics is a bitch..."

Luna's eyes widened, though Lincoln couldn't be certain as to whether it was due to Sam swearing or an idea popped in her head. Either way, he shut the door before moseying over to the fridge. There were some Mac 'n Cheese bites Dad left in there as leftovers, and they were his for the taking.

"Dude, I just got an idea for that." Lincoln heard Luna say. "Buuuuut I don't know how my folks will like me cussing in a song..."

"Don't a lot of famous bands do it though?" Sam pointed out with a chuckle.

"Yeah, but I got a few standards." There was a short pause as Lincoln licked his lips, finding the container that held the snack he sought. "Except using British swears. Even Dad doesn't know all of them."

Lincoln could only imagine the smugness on Luna's face right now. Shaking his head, the 13 year old shut the fridge door, a popping sound echoed in the room that made the two girls jump in their seats.

"That you Lucy?" Luna called out.

"Even Lucy isn't that loud." Lincoln answered, walking past the archway as he approached the microwave.

"Oh." Luna smiled. "Sup Lincoln."

"Wazzup little man." Sam greeted.

"When'd you get here?" The brunette asked.

"Like..." Lincoln counted in his head as he slipped the container inside the little oven, pressing a few buttons to set the timer before starting it. "Ten minutes ago? I was outside settling a spat between Lana and Charles."

Luna dropped her smile as an unamused stare took shape. "She dug up another of his bones again?"

"Close." The oven beeped, prompting the white-haired teen to take his food out. "Chew toy." Popping the lid open, the smell of melted cheese and meatballs greeted his nose. Smiling to himself, Lincoln strolled out of the kitchen with the container in hand.

Upon seeing the food he was carrying, Luna smirked and reached out. "Thanks bro, I'm gettin' a little peckish."

Lincoln glared at the rocker. "Hey!" He tucked the container under his arm, away from Luna's grasp.

Luna chuckled. "Just jossin' ya bro." She lightly bumped his arm with a fist. "Last thing we need is everyone settin' up traps for the fridge again."

Lincoln grimaced a bit. "It took forever to wash that blue paint off..." He slipped a meatball into his mouth before continuing into the living room.

Eyeing the clock, Lincoln figured he had half an hour before he was due to start a game session with a few of his friends. Rusty and Liam clearly weren't gonna be on it due to other reasons, but Zach, Conner, and Clyde were still gonna show up; Lincoln just needed to make sure he could have the TV for two hours. Heading up the stairs, the sole Loud child could hear a few someones talking in their respective rooms. He flinched when Leni gave a squeal as he reached the top step, her voice emanating from her room as she spoke enthusiastically.

"She's probably on the phone." Lincoln shrugged.

As he passed by Lynn and Lucy's room, he spotted the Duchess of Darkness also talking on her phone with a smile on her face; a rare sight coming from her. Curiosity caught him in its grasp as he lingered a little by her door, wondering what put her in a scarce state. Upon hearing the name Rocky, Lincoln nodded in understanding before continuing to his room. Lucy and Rusty's little brother weren't officially 'dating' per se, but Lucy was clearly smitten with the redhead. Love at first site, as they say.

A warm smile graced Lincoln's face as he recalled the time he first met Ronalda. She may have pranked him as a way to show her affection, but he knew she wouldn't have bothered trying anything if the Loud didn't have a trait she liked. Of course, the Latina had long since moved past that phase, but still kept the brash attitude he came to admire about her. And speaking of brash attitudes, Lincoln backpedaled a little and noticed Lynn wasn't in the room. Looking down the hall towards his older siblings' rooms, the bathroom door was wide open; no dice there.

"She's probably out running again." Lincoln muttered before giving a casual shrug as he stepped away from his dark sister's room.

Passing the twins' room, Lola was sitting in her bed reading a book. She glanced upwards upon hearing a set of feet shuffling on the carpet.

The youngest of the twins smiled at him. "Hey Linky."

"Hey Lols." Lincoln greeted back as he passed the doorway.

What? You thought she'd be practicing her makeup for the 1 millionth time? If there's one thing that did change about Lola over the past two years (and as a result from the beginning of the bad luck fiasco), her vanity had dropped considerably. Sure, she still held a sizable ego about her beauty, but she no longer flaunted it like a spoiled princess. And if Lincoln had to be honest, it was growing tiresome that she wore her gowns day in and day out. Sure, he used to wear the same orange polos and jeans daily; but to the outside observer, one would assume Lola thought it was Halloween every day of the year.

Lola even developed a habit for reading books whenever she was bored, something she picked up after Lincoln helped her understand basic reading techniques. Now these days, it was a method of self-teaching so she could get ahead of her class.

Lincoln's lips curled down as he recalled the way he manhandled the then six year old when his anger was near its tipping point. Even though he was angry at a level he hadn't experienced before, the middle child couldn't forget that face Lola had when he dropped her. "I hope that didn't have anything to do with her becoming nicer..." Lincoln shuddered as a chill ran through his spine. "I was no better than those jerky older brothers who pick on their siblings..."

To drive the point home, Lincoln had approached Lola about a week after he returned home and apologized for handling her so roughly. Lola only smiled and told him that she 'had it coming' after the numerous times she abused him either physically or mentally. Still, Lincoln swore that he wouldn't threaten his little sisters like that ever again; even today, seeing how far his rage could go spooked him...

Eyeing Lisa's closed door, Lincoln had half the mind to speak with her about it. However, hearing his genius sister speaking in scientific terms beyond the wood, he figured she was either in a conference call or doing an experiment; both of which required privacy. Giving a light shrug, Lincoln entered his room without a word, snacking on the rest of the cheesy bites to kill a little time; and started planning on how to become Couch Commando before anyone else did.


Ronalda studied her reflection, pulling on the upper straps of the bra Carlota picked out so it felt a little more comfortable. True to her word, the Casagrande had given her a simple sports bra colored in a semi-dark purple that she could wear for daily use. It felt a little snug, but Ronalda figured it'd last her til she grew up a couple sizes; she was only an A-cup after all.

"Alright..." The Santiago put her hands on her hips. "I'll take it. Just this once..."

"What was that?" Carlota asked outside the dressing room.

"I said I'll go with it!" Ronalda yelled in an irate voice.

"Don't forget to try on the other clothes I picked out!" The older Latina stated, to which Ronalda eyed the bag sitting on the bench.

Biting her cheek, the Santiago dug into the bag until her fingers brushed against the tightly woven fabric of a pair of shorts. Pulling them out, Ronalda found they were a pair of denim short shorts. Not unlike the pair she currently wore, but after pressing them flat against her waist, the 13 year old saw they only stopped around the middle of her thighs.

"Geez, are these freaking booty shorts?..." The Latina muttered, holding them at eye level.

She looked down at the pair she was wearing currently, having only tried on two bras at this point. Ronalda pursed her lips upon noticing they stopped at the same length as this new pair. She didn't need to check how they fit around her rear, knowing that these were the same size she'd been wearing for the past year or so. Plus, Sid tapping her was enough of a hint at how much they hugged her figure.

"Ugh...let's get this over with..." Ronalda muttered, slipping off her old pair and fitting on the new one.

As she adjusted the waist, she couldn't help but notice how loose and comfortable the newer shorts felt; yet, they still felt a little tight when she bent her legs. Turning with her back to the mirror, the Latina looked over her shoulder, noting at how much the shorts appeared to hug her butt.

"Yeesh...I did grow a bit back there." Ronalda grabbed the tag hanging off the right leg. "And these are a bigger size?" She shifted her legs a little. "They definitely feel more comfortable though..."

Part of Ronalda wanted to get Carlota's opinion, since she'd definitely knew more about clothes shopping than she ever did. But...did she really want her cousin making a big scene out of it? Ronalda wasn't typically a girl to feel self-conscious about her body; not in public at least. She shuddered a little as her cheeks heated up at the memory of what happened the last time she walked out of there with some new duds Carlota picked for her.

"Yeah, I'm definitely not doing that..." Ronalda growled. "Carlota may be older, but she still has a set of lungs..." Tapping her chin. "Who else could I ask?..."Her left eye squinted a little in thought. "Mmm...Lori?" She played with the idea for a moment before shaking her head. "Nah, she's working. Annnnd she might spread the word to Carol and whoever else if I send her a picture." She hummed a little. "Mom?" Immediately after the word left her mouth, Ronalda sighed a little. "She's probably hands deep in someone's chest right now...I know I can't ask Sid or Nikki cause they won't shut up about it afterwards..."

After crossing out her grandmother and aunt for various reasons, Ronalda grew more and more frustrated as she started running out of options. At the last moment though, her thoughts drifted to Lincoln. Naturally, discussing girl clothing with a boy wouldn't cross her mind; but this wasn't just any boy though. Being that Lincoln had nearly a dozen sisters, the likelihood of him having to help pick out clothes for the girls was pretty high; and he was her boyfriend, so his opinion mattered too. Looking at her reflection, Ronalda couldn't help but wonder what Lincoln's reaction would be if he saw her right now. While she no longer pulled pranks on him, the Latina was quite flirtatious when the situation called for it.

"They can stare all they want, but they aren't gonna get any." Sid's words echoed in the Latina's head. Just imagining Lincoln staring at her like a moth to a flame put a smile on her face. "Well, someone certainly is." Ronalda spoke with suppressed giggles as she looked for her phone. "Been a while since I last teased Linky-Poo." Her smile faltered a little as she thought about the news that had to be made the other day. "And I think he could use a little 'motivation'."

Ronalda didn't know whether it was because of her hormones going crazy, or it was the idea of seeing Lincoln in a loving daze being very appealing; either way, she was dead set on knocking his socks off. After finding her phone, Ronalda practiced a few poses in front of the mirror to look as cute as possible while also giving some definition to her butt. Once she felt she struck the right position, the Latina snapped a picture.


"Conner, there's a badass to your left. No, your LEFT!" Lincoln yelled into his microphone headset as he button mashed his controller.

He succeeded in snagging the remote after a bit of an argument with Luan, but he suggested she could hang with Benny for a couple hours while he got his game on. At the moment, himself, Conner, Zach, and Clyde were trying to beat a Circle of Slaughter that was proving to be a chore because of the numerous enemies that kept spawning with heavy weapons.

"FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" Conner screamed over the chat as his character was incapacitated.

"I heard that all the way from my house." Clyde joked, his character running over to help Conner's.

"Is it just me, or are all of them shooting radiation?" Zach asked.

"No, it's cryo too. And acid for me cause every time I jump in the mech, I get blasted with it..." Lincoln groaned. He thumbed hard on the right trigger before laughing to himself. "Finally got you, asshole!"

"Linky! Watch your language!" Leni yelled from upstairs.

Lincoln sulked a little, being grateful that his parents weren't home yet. "Sorry!" He then heard the two-pronged chime of his phone, which meant he received a text. Raising a brow, Lincoln glanced at his mobile, his curiosity peaking when he saw Ronalda's name on the screen.

"Hey guys, I gotta take a sec." Lincoln stated, putting the controller down and picking up the phone.

Swiping the screen with his thumb to unlock it, Lincoln went into the text app and selected Ronalda's text block. He saw the message had a picture that needed to be downloaded, to which the teen shrugged and tapped it with his thumb.

"Wonder what she sent." Lincoln said to no one in particular.

A moment later, the only thing anyone heard was a loud thumping sound followed by an object crashing onto the floor.

"Uh...what was that?" Zach asked.

Conner muttered something under his breath as his character looked for the nearest enemy he could gain a second wind from. "I think it came from Lincoln's end. Did you drop something dude?"

The line was silent, until the boys heard a feminine scream.

"Lincoln?" Clyde asked out, becoming more confused by the second.

In the living room, Luna and Sam walked in from the dining room upon hearing the noise, with the brunette shrieking upon seeing Lincoln lying crumpled on the floor. Rushing over to him, Luna was almost in tears as she saw spots of blood on the floor. Turning Lincoln onto his back, the older teens saw there was a good amount of blood spewing from Lincoln's nostrils, his eyes were completely whited out, and there was a bit of droll coming out of his mouth. His controller lied on the floor close to him, having a few spots of blood covering the thumb sticks and directional pad.

Sam covered her mouth to avoid screaming outright. "Did he have a seizure?!"

"What is the cause for alarm?" Lisa asked as she came downstairs, holding an empty plate with breadcrumbs on it.

"I think Lincoln hit his head or something!" Luna yelled frantically.

Lisa blinked for a moment as those words echoed in her head. "What?..." She dropped the plate before rushing over.

Leni, Lola, and Lucy must've heard Luna's call, seeing as they practically flew down the steps and joined the others around their fallen brother. Leni gave a shrill scream and immediately ran towards the phone.

Lisa started checking Lincoln's vitals, pressing a hand to his chest and a few fingers against his neck. "Heart beat seems normal, albeit a little fast..." She opened his mouth a little wider to peer inside, squinting her eyes in curiosity. "Ptyalin levels are surprisingly normal, no excessive buildup that would be acute to epilepsy..." Lisa turned her head sideways to listen for Lincoln's breathing, becoming more confused as it wasn't uneven or quick. "His respiratory functionality is normal?" Turning towards Luna, "What happened to him?"

"L-Look, I don't know brah." Luna stated in a shaken tone. "Me and Sam were still thinkin' up some lyrics when we heard a noise."

"Mmmmm..." Lisa hummed as her lips thinned into a fine line. She focused back on Lincoln and started shaking him. "Lincoln, wake up." The boy only gave a gasp in response. "Say something!" The 6 year old demanded as she lightly slapped his cheek.

"Bah...bah...bah..." Lincoln stammered out, his eyes still completely white. Thankfully, the blood coming from his nose slowed to drips.

"Wha?..." Sam asked aloud.

Lola rolled her eyes. "For Pete's sake, move over." She gently pushed Lisa out of the way before promptly smacking Lincoln's cheeks harder, making his head move side to side from the hits. "Wake up Lincoln! You're gonna be late for school!" It was obviously a fib, but it appeared Lola was dead set on trying anything to bring Lincoln back to life.

Whilst this was occurring, Luna noticed Lincoln's phone lying just inches from his hand. The screen had a sizable blood stain on it, but the musician could just make out a picture behind the foreign obstruction. Picking up the device, Luna coated two fingers in spit before wiping the blood off, only to widen her eyes once the picture became clearer. The text from Ronalda had the picture of the Latina in a dressing room, making an alluring pose whilst wearing a sports bra and some shorts that Luna couldn't tell if they were a little too tight for her. They definitely pronounced her butt though.

Under the picture, there was a text that read: [What do you think?]

Within a few seconds, all the worry in Luna's core was washed away as fits of giggles escaped her throat. She snorted a little to suppress her laughter, only to outright echo her humor across the room once everything was pieced together. "Oh man, this is priceless! Hahaha!" She held her stomach upon doubling over in laughter.

Sam bit her cheek at the odd display. "What's so funny?" Lola stopped her little assault to gawk at the cackling teen.

Luna didn't answer, only shoving the phone into the blonde's hands. Sam raised a brow before glancing at the device; it only took a few seconds before she caught the laugh bug, her cheeks turning red after covering her mouth with a fist to avoid laughing like a maniac.

Lisa didn't see the hilarity of the situation, casting a mild frown at the two. "I fail to see what you could possibly find," She paused for a moment as Sam reached out with the phone in hand. The little prodigy nearly snatched it from her hand. "Comedic about..." Lisa's mouth dropped a little as she also nearly went bug-eyed at the photo. "This..."

The little genius looked between the picture and Lincoln's current state, the situation becoming all too transparent in a few seconds. Unlike the others, Lisa only cleared her throat before developing her usual stoic expression. "Well, there is no cause for alarm then."

"Is it what I think it is?" Lucy asked.

The 6 year old gave a curt nod. "Our elder brother simply experienced an abrupt increase in arousal due to the digital photo Ronnie Anne sent him."

Upon hearing his girlfriend being mentioned, Lincoln let loose a loud moan as more blood spewed from his nose. Lola, who unfortunately had been right in front of his face at that moment, had gotten specks of blood sprayed onto her hands and shirt.

"EWWWWWW!" Lola shrieked as she jumped away from Lincoln, then ran past everyone as she took to the stairs. "THIS IS GONNA TAKE FOREVER TO WASH OUT!" Came the pageant winner's scream before everyone heard a door slam shut.

Lucy smile a little. "Hah hah." Naturally, her usual dark and broody tone marked the delightfulness she was currently feeling.

Leni pulled the phone away from her ear as the ensuing laughter became too distracting. "Did someone tell a joke or...?"

Lisa looked towards her second oldest sibling, then the phone. "Leni," She looked the fashionista in the eye. "Did you call Emergency Services?"

"Yeah?"

"Oh boy..." Lisa muttered under her breath. "Please tell them it was a false alarm and it was only a trivial issue."

Leni frowned. "But what about Lincoln?"

The six year old wave her hand dismissively. "He's fine, I assure you."

On the TV, everyone's characters had met up around Lincoln's, who died due to inactivity and respawned outside the arena. The boys could hear Luna and Sam laughing, but were still left in the dark about what transpired.

"Soooo, what just happened?" Zach voiced while sifting through the ammo vendor.

"I think Luan must've played a prank on him or something." Clyde stated. In his room, he was still checking his phone for when Lincoln eventually replied to the 10 messages he sent.

"Well, whatever it was..." Conner started enthusiastically as he inspected a new gun he picked up from a freshly killed badass. "You guys owe me BIG for all that carrying I just did!"

Zach frowned from behind his screen. "What? You kept going down the most!"

"I was still the last one left alive!" Conner countered.

Clyde rolled his eyes. "Against the last group of zealots..."

Conner growled loudly over the line. "Why do you guys gotta be so hateful?!"


"Come on Lame-O! How long does it take to respond to a text?..." Ronalda growled, growing more and more impatient as each second passed. While the use of Lincoln's old nickname was scarce these days, the 13 year old couldn't help but drop it during times she was a bit irate at the Loud.

"Almost done in there Ronnie Anne?" Carlota called out.

"In a minute!" The younger Latina responded. Glancing back at her phone, she checked to make sure she sent the picture to the right number. "Ugh! He should've gotten it by now..." Rapping her fingers on her arm, "Is someone else using his phone?..." A sense of dread filled her at the possibility of some boy using her boyfriend's phone and making googly eyes at the photo she took. God, that would end her life immediately. She'd probably be trending on some stupid porn websites where a bunch of pedophiles would fap to her...

The vibration of her phone grabbed the girl's attention, whipping it up to her face in an instant. However, instead of getting a new reply from Lincoln, Ronalda found a text from Luna. Swiping over to the other block, the first thing she was greeted upon was a picture of a passed out Lincoln Loud with blood still coating the area between his upper lip and nose, fully white eyes, and some drool leaving his mouth. An actual text message popped up a moment later.

Nice duds bra. You really knocked him dead! XD - Luna

Ronalda's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as she blushed profusely. Clearly, her plan worked a little too well...

However, a smile started to grace her lips. If that picture was any proof, Lincoln didn't think she was just a pretty face; he thought she was drop-dead gorgeous. A bit of a stretch, Ronalda knew, because she wasn't as pretty as some of the other girls in her grade. Even Sid was a bit more attractive than she was; not that she needed to know that. But, it didn't matter.

"Carlota, I'm finished!" Ronalda yelled as she slipped her regular attire back on.

After a minute, the Santiago stepped out of the dressing area with the bag in tow, the younger Latina was greeted to her more buxom cousin standing there with her hands on her hips. "You sure took a long time in there. I thought you wanted to be 'in and out'."

Ronalda shrugged, shoving a hand into her pocket. "What can I say? Needed to make sure everything looked right on me."

Carlota gave a short chortle. "You never seemed to care before." She turned as the two started walking to the nearest cashier. "So, you find everything alright?"

The 13 year old gave a sincere smile. "Yep. Everything fit juuust fine."

In Ronalda's pocket, a message had been sent to Lincoln's phone. It was a simple, yet cute message that had a couple hearts bordering it on each side.

[See you in a few days Linky-Poo~~]

A/N: I had a thought to end it after Lincoln went to spend time doing whatever, but added this last segment after entertaining the idea enough to see where it would go. I also could've added a scene with Lynn and Clyde talking, but I'd rather save that for later. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this segment, and Lincoln is definitely gonna need a box of tissues. Also, if anyone guessed right, the boys were playing Slaughter Shaft on Borderlands 3.