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Receiving a call from his father in the middle of the night one night, Hawkeye is confused when B.J. is the one Daniel wants to talk to. When the line goes dead, Hawkeye waits all night for a return call, but in the morning, when nothing comes, he decides to take a shower. Running into a corpman who asks to pick up a body, Hawkeye directs him to Klinger who then directs him back to Hawkeye. In the middle of shaving, Hawkeye feels a little confused as the man he talks to earlier takes a tour of the shower tent. He watches the man closely before continuing to apply shaving cream.
"'Is this the whole tent?'" Detweiler asks. Quickly, Hawkeye quips, "'And nothing but the tent.'"
He is in no mood for jokes when his father actually calls Korea to talk to B.J. instead of him. When he is handed a copy of his death certificate, the surgeon quickly rinses off his shaving cream. Grabbing his clothes and putting them on, Hawkeye verbally explains why his dad calls for his bunk mate. When the man on Morgue Detail complains that Hawkeye is supposed to be dead and that he will be put on something worse for messing up three times in a matter of weeks, Hawkeye asks what to call the man.
"'Digger'," He replies. Putting his jacket on, Hawkeye explains, "'I hate to inconvenience you Digger. I really do, but I happen to be alive. Born that way, you know.'"
However when Digger keeps insisting he needs a body, Hawkeye directs him to the mess tent before heading off to Colonel Potter's office. Finding Potter talking to Frank, Hawkeye interrupts them and is finally able to inform his CO that he is dead.
"'We're all a little tired Hawkeye'," Colonel Potter states.
"'Not dead tired, Colonel. Dead dead, as in doornail. My corpus has been declared delicti.'"
Taking the paper from his Chief Surgeon, Colonel Potter reads through it and quickly calls for Klinger.
"'There's been a clerical error down the line. Captain Pierce here has been listed as dead'," Potter informs to which Klinger remarks about the phone call causing Hawkeye to add, "'That's why they called my father.'"
Klinger is soon put in charge of contacting Daniel Pierce leaving Hawkeye to avoid Digger as he follows the company around waiting for a body to drop. Bumping into his wife in the middle of camp, Margaret practically yells at him asking why he never tells her about his death. Nodding in the direction of her tent, Hawkeye leads Margaret inside to explain, "I didn't know until twenty minutes ago. I had to tell Potter first. Wait? How did you find out?"
"I ran into that morgue corporal."
"Digger. Yeah, he's on the hunt for a body."
"Does your dad know?" She asks, her face softening. Nodding, Hawkeye sits on the edge of his wife's desk stating, "He was told via telegram. He called B.J. in the middle of the night, but the call dropped. Klinger's trying to get through for me."
"I wish he could have called me," Margaret laments. With a sigh, she steps closer to her husband who holds out his hand to her. She takes it and brings it to where she can study it. She never notices his hands before, at least not in this much detail. After a moment, Hawkeye remarks, "Maybe we should just tell people."
Shaking her head, Margaret almost says something when they hear the loud speaker call for Hawkeye to meet B.J. in post op.
Complaining to B.J. during surgery about his death, Hawkeye looks over once to find Digger standing near the door eating a candy bar. Addressing the Lieutenant with the unhappy news that there is no dead body for him to take back, Hawkeye hopes to be rid of him. B.J., after surgery tells his friend that he will organize a wake for him just as Klinger comes in telling Hawkeye he is going to try to reach Daniel through telegram. After leaving a message with Klinger, Hawkeye tells B.J. he feels bad for his father, and is cheered up by his party. However, after the party is when things start to go downhill. First, Hawkeye is told that no messages can get through to the States. The next day, he meets with an army department worker who tells him the death cannot be straightened out. A few days later on pay day, Hawkeye finds out the army will not pay him because he is dead. Finding Margaret after the fight, Hawkeye simply lays in her cot complaining.
"I can give you money," She tells him as she moves his head so she can sit down and play with his hair. Enjoying the feeling of having his hair played with, Hawkeye is quiet for a minute before telling her, "It's not that really. No one can get in contact with Dad, the army is being less than helpful. I just want to be alive again."
"I know," She soothes, or tries to. Having no idea what he is going through, she knows all she can do is listen to him. After a moment, she remarks, "This may seem macabre, but what do I get? In your will?"
"Just about everything, except what I give my dad," He remarks. After a moment, he sits up suddenly surprising Margaret. Confused, the nurse waits for her husband to say something. Instead, Hawkeye kisses her, tells her he loves her, and leaves the tent baffling her even more. Margaret stays in her seat for about five minutes, before she heads to find Klinger. Commandering the phone, the nurse goes through as many channels as she can think of trying to get a call to Crabapple Cove. After three hours, she succeeds.
"Daniel Pierce?" She asks when the line picks up. Surprised to hear from his daughter-in-law, Daniel answers, "Maggie? Are you okay?"
"Fine. I wanted to call about Hawkeye," Margaret answers before asking Klinger to go find the man in question. Nodding, Klinger is soon gone causing Margaret to relax a little.
"Daniel," She begins as her father in law tells her to call him Dad.
"Dad," She replies knowing she is safe, "Hawkeye's alive."
The line goes quiet for a few moments causing Margaret to think she just killed Daniel. Finally she asks, "Are you there."
She receives a soft Yes as the door opens, causing the nurse to smile as she says, "I think there's someone who wants to talk to you."
Handing the phone over to her husband, Margaret lets their hands brush a little too long as Hawkeye mouths a thank you to her. Smiling, Margaret gives his shoulder a reassuring squeeze before leaving the room.
"Dad?" Hawkeye states. As soon as he does, there is immediate crying on the other line. Amidst the sobbing, Klinger gives Hawkeye a cup of coffee before heading back out to do some work.
When his father does speak, Hawkeye simply hears both his nickname and his given name said multiple times puncuated by sobbing causing Hawkeye to console his father. He nearly laughs as Daniel tells him he sold the younger man's golf clubs which prompts more crying.
"'Quit crying, Dad. It's okay. Really! I needed a new set of clubs anyway. Li-'"
"Did they change you to living?"
"'No, I'm still dead as far as the army is concerned, but they're working on it. Listen, Dad can I ask you a favor. You think you could start sending my allowance again?'"
"Only if you do your chores, How long?"
"Just for a little while. I'll let you know how much.'"
"I'll start out with the money I got from the clubs." There's a pause before Daniel tells his son how good it is to hear his son's voice.
"'What?'" Hawkeye asks, the line static. Finally realizing what his father says, Hawkeye answers, "'It's good to hear your voice too.'"
When his father cannot hear him, Hawkeye repeats his last statement with a yell. Enjoying being able to talk with his father, the surgeon is a little upset when the line disconnects. Leaving the room, Hawkeye starts to wander back to his tent, but heads to his wife's instead.
"How was your call?" Margaret asks when her husband enters her tent. Sighing, he answers, "Great, until I was cut off."
Frowning at the call being cut off, the nurse asks what they talked about. Sitting next to his wife, Hawkeye takes her hand in his, examining it before telling her what he and his father talk about.
"You know," He states, "I miss being at the house with just us and Dad."
Humming commitally, Margaret states, "So do I. I also hate having to pretend I don't know him. It took everything in me not to call him 'Dad' or 'Daniel' after the letters and getting to know you both so well for a year. I only got to talk to him like his daughter- in- law when Klinger was gone to get you."
"I wish you could too. I hate keeping our secret like this."
"I do too, but what can we do? My dad pulled a lot of strings to get us here together, and I don't want you to go as selfish as that sounds."
"Me neither," Hawkeye answers as his wife puts her head on his shoulder. The couple is quiet a moment until Margaret states that she feels sorry for B.J.'s wife, Peg.
"That's one reason I signed up to come here. I couldn't think of you being here and not knowing what would happen, and since I could come here."
"You did," Hawkeye answers before laughing to himself. Moving away from her husband's shoulder Margaret looks at him questioningly asking what he is laughing at.
"I'm trying to picture you being a housewife," He states. Shaking her head, Margaret tells him she would have found a job somehow adding, "I don't think I could ever be a housewife."
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