2:00 AM
Mars had brought Shane back to his truck. Within the open bed were worn towels, extra clothes, and jugs of water. Shane cozied himself up between the towels and extra garments, lying to Mars when he said he wouldn't leave until he came back. Mars pressed kisses up and down Shane before leaving promising to be back as soon as he could. In the dark loneliness of the clearing, Shane listened to everything. Blood pumping, insects breathing, the foliage curving from the night wind, soft and whistling. He had to keep himself together - he had to learn how to let these things be an effect not an affect.
For once, Shane was an observer instead of participant in this cruel existence. Just letting the bugs breathe, the blood flow, and the unfurling of all the things he had missed from being so caught up in his own life. Shane could hear death, could feel the soul leave the body out of just the tiny animals being ripped apart from predators…like him. Was this what Mars had been trying to allude to when he spoke of all the problems he didn't see in others? That seemed pretty unfair. It's one thing to be watching the living from the comforts of immortality, to know how things played out over and over. How old did Mars say he was again? It didn't matter, and Shane knew that. What did matter was, after hitting such a hard low, he was coming back up out of that pit, finally understanding what Mars wanted him to accept.
The world doesn't just follow me.
The thought didn't hit him like a cold reality, or a frigid wave of thinking he was a self-centered inconsiderate bastard. It hit like warm running water on a chilled hand. It stung for a moment as Shane was put off by the idea of how much he didn't pay real attention to what was around him, like a terrified animal jumping at the nothingness that might be a beast, constantly in fight or flight. However, the stinging was replaced by the warm acknowledgement that his senses were now able to pick up all the racing lungs and fluttered hearts of animals scared and alive, for now. Shane thought about the life he had while he had been alive. Betrayed his best friend, the love of his life who was now gone, unable to ever say to his face how sorry he was for what had happened. He had brought Jas into the world by accident only to have no place to keep her, having to leech off his aunt until forever because he never really did have a plan on how to get him and her out of Marnie's house. He lost his job only to then drink himself to death, wallowing in his own disaster.
Shane had been over this before - his fear of change, the perception of him not being man enough to take care of the dues of his life. But now he was dead, so what was the point in worrying about it now? The dead don't change. Only the living do that. He would now always be an observer. Watching, waiting, just like Mars would.
He was an opportunity hunter, a monster.
No matter how he shifted his weight, the bed of the truck draped in rags and towels wasn't able to keep Shane comfortable. His restless quest for understanding the meaning of this madness had Shane up and pacing around the vehicle, lingering for Mars' return…like a shark…like a predator…like a hungry monster.
The joints of his hands stiffened and he felt that familiar tingle that he had at the creek when he had seen the rabbit corpses. The evil within wanted another round to stretch his flesh too far, to make his fingers pointed and harsh, his jaw like a chainsaw. Acceptance was all Shane could do. He couldn't fight it. He had spent a lifetime fighting his way through what the universe had given him, and it left him here. The perfume of blood turned his mouth wet, and slowly with great control, he allowed those rows of sharp knives hidden within their own sockets in the roof and basement of his mouth to creep up. If he couldn't stop it, he could at least feel some sense of control over his own beastly anatomy.
Whatever stood behind him, with a heart thumping under a ribcage, pushing gore through plump capillaries and veins, would soon have its soul disconnected from its corpse. Shane caught himself trying to breath and stopped, he didn't need the air anymore.
I'm a fucking monster and I'm fucking hungry...
His pupils constricted and he felt his dead heart drop into his guts as Shane's toothy mouth opened wide, gaping open for more than just his ill fitting fangs.
"Uncle Shane, I'm scared…" Jas whimpered, covered head to toe in dripping red.
The alluring shine of the blood that was only thin where her tears had traveled.
"I'm really wet and I'm...I'm …scared…and I want my mom!" The little girl sobbed.
Shane didn't count the time it took him to make the connection that this was Jas, his daughter, the little girl he was tasked to protect. He only saw a meal - a delicious, mouth-watering, stomach-filing feast.
The bright stars greeted Shane as he woke up. Jetted from a slumber he didn't know he had slipped into, the woods active and his heart… dead. However, even if his heart chose not to beat, his sense filled his being with adrenaline. Beads of sweat dripped down his cool skin. He told himself it was only that a dream, nothing more,
No. I wanted to eat my daughter, I wanted to- fucking god, no.
This was the hard truth yet again. He wouldn't be able to control this insatiable taste. Shane didn't have a choice. The blackened pit that was his soul compelled him to hunt. It was worse than any withdrawal as it didn't turn his insides to stew, it only forced out the fangs and claws he was trying to keep hidden. But what he did know about withdrawal was that it went away once you fed it.
A faint drop of iron scent hit his nostrils, turning his already watering mouth overflowing with saliva and the fangs within wanting to pull through. However, Shane was learning how to keep them in place. He promised Mars he wouldn't leave, but while trekking through the drenched forest noting how the mosquitoes refused to land on him, he thought about what exactly he would say in his apology. The bloody aroma led the way as with every step, Shane told himself that when he got whatever was injured or dead already it would quench his need. If this was anything like when he couldn't get booze well...it might keep Jas safe from him if he was too full to want to feed. Each step was worse than the last. Two fangs had managed to slip their way over his lips, but Shane didn't care. He was so close to dinner, so close to being able to control himself again.
Plaid clothing was hung up on a tree branch deliberately placed in its position to try its best to keep dry. The blue hue was familiar enough to make Shane halt in his prowling. Inspecting the shirt further, he found more than just the button up. Everything from shoes to an undershirt. He took the shirt into his grasp. It smelled like Mars. He slowly stalked forward, the blood scent overwhelming. He could hear the distressed whimpers of a deer and the sloughing of its flesh. Before Shane could get into view...
LEAVE
He felt the word, more than he heard it as his skin turned to goosebumps, and his spine into ice. In another life, he might've considered what the ominous message commanded of him, but he was dead and no longer had fear of what might end him.
The monster that had eluded the valley for so long, that stole cattle and killed people was now crouched down, eating a deer alive, sucking the life from it with its meat grinder of a mouth. Shane stood only feet from the bastard and its glossy black wet skin stretched so thin it outlined bones and tendons. It snapped Shane out of the hunger fog, as he couldn't stop staring at the curls of black and gray hair he recognized as Mars'.
I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO SEE ME LIKE THIS
More words within his mind rather than sounds he could hear snapped Shane out of his trance. Even stooped down the beast was the same height as Shane. The interview he had caught on the news was no joke, this thing was as tall as it was gaunt, like a walking skeleton, joints popping and a heart thumping so hard within its rib cage that Shane could see the displacement of skin with each beat as it meticulously deconstructed the deer. Long claws that were once fingers kept the monster's victim in place as Shane watched a second jaw leach itself down into the poor animal's gore, moving through its anatomy, until…
The deer was finally dead, its wails of agony finally put to rest as what Shane could see was that the monster's second jaw had attached to some sort of important organ. It guzzled down glups of blood, disgusting in the way its throat seemed to pump the gore from the freshly dead to its killer, draining until nothing remained. The creature pulled its second jaw back into itself, resetting it before turning to the intruder. Black pupils all encompassing without a soul behind them stared deadpan into Shane's, the beast covered in rain and blood.
"I'm sorry I called you a monster," Shane apologized, the scent of blood creeping back into him. "I think I get it now."
He looked away as the sharp twists and turns of malforming bones and flesh writhed and twitched back into the form of a man - of more than a man - a person he called his love. Shane tried to not think of the pain Mars was in whilst changing as the otherworldly howls of anguish turned to labored wheezing then breathing, then-
"It's okay, I understand."
Shane turned his attention to his love's voice. Where once a monster of gore and terror sat was now Mars, naked, hair matted and covered in blood, shaking from the cold. As Shane went to join him on the ground he noticed a clawed hand that had failed to realign still long and knife-like. Mars pulled it away into his other.
"Ahh, sorry. Sometimes even I don't get it right."
Without much resistance Shane pulled his lover's hand and claw into his. The squeeze of hunger turned his stomach and made his gums tingle. All the blood everywhere, as if the sky had rained liquor. He gazed at the dead animal.
"I'm so hungry babe," Shane muttered, desperation in his words. "I don't know what to do…it hurts."
Shane brought Mars' fingers up to his mouth, letting his tongue slither between each digit. The flavor of blood would've turned Shane sick if he were still human, but he wasn't and lapped at the plentiful abundance dripping down Mars hand. Shane felt pointed talons move through his hair then pull his head up. Those eyes, beautifully maroon and unsure, scared even. In the time Shane had known Mars he had always been sure of himself, always proactive not reactive. The man didn't sweat, until now. With a shaky claw he brought Shane in for a kiss, a long drawn out embrace, tongues and hands on each other no doubt leaving stains on Shanes worn jacket. Mars guided Shane's kisses from his lips to his cheek down his jawline.
"I didn't leave you any," Mars uttered his voice showing his uncertainty. Shane pulled him closer, fingers entwining in that long curly hair, his lips kissing the nook of Mars shoulder. A deep wave of hunger twisted Shanes insides up and he squeezed Mars through the pain.
"It's okay…I'll live."
"Feed off me," Mars said. "Youre hungry and I'm more than full."
"Won't it hurt you?"
"I'll be okay, just try to line up with the scar."
Hesitantly, Shane traced the spot with his pointed canines, the fangs like needles dragging against soft skin feeling for a vein. The scars were hard and calloused over. Shane teased the area, the cadaver of his conscience unable to rise from the dead and stop what he would do next.
The splitting of skin, his teeth soaking up stolen fluids, what evil had Shane decided to commit? Who would he be after it was done?
Even if this wasn't the first time Mars has allowed this to happen, he still winced at the puncturing of his skin and the consumption of the blood he had just looted from his deer victim. He had to give Shane credit where credit was due - he was gentle in his drawing of gore, only letting the necessary incisors stab deep and drain. The needles poked out from the soft meat of Shane's gums and muscles gracing the skin, taunting that at any moment they might shoot out and keep Mars anchored in Shane's grip. Vertigo set in and Mars felt the world spin, and the only thing keeping him from being pulled into the rotation was Shane. Those tough hands against his exposed back pulled him into what heat his love had managed to smuggle under his layers of clothes.
Mars found himself aroused by the weight and power Shane held over him at this exact moment as he dug his nails into the back of the man who was sucking him dry. He wondered if Shane could even feel his hard cock pressing up against that soft stomach Mars loved to nuzzle up to after making love. The gnawing on his throat only served to push the erotic muttering up and out. How long had it been since Mars was the victim? His fate in the hands of another? The memories flooding back, unpleasant ones he thought he had forgotten about.
Shane unlatched his jaw, fangs jetting back up indetectable as their only difference now being their jagged point. He hadn't taken a breath or bothered to open his eyes until now. A sinking disgust raged over Shane's skin when he saw the marks and punctures he left on his beloved, the bruising beginning to form. He thought he was being careful, gentle even though this had been his first time doing such a monstrous act. He tried to wipe away the blood he had sloppily missed only to have Mars stop him by folding his own hand into his.
"Did you get enough?"
5:00 AM
Marnie awoke to her own screaming. Another nightmare, the darkness viscous and suffocating. In a frenzy she jumped out of bed, running to her lamp. In a heap of sweat and breathlessness she searched her room for the monsters within her night terrors. Nothing hid in the shadows and her heart wouldn't stop trying to thump out of her chest.
As she waited in the kitchen for her tea to cool, she remembered the night when Shane had caught her in the spot she was in now asking her what was keeping her up. How she wished her grumpy nephew would have been there to save her from her own thoughts now. Marnie could barely look at the door to his room as she shakiley brought the cup of hot tea to her lips, a small sip before pretending he was back in his room playing video games and drinking.
"I had another dream about you being…not yourself. I don't know how to put this but, you were how you've been looking in my dreams. But you...liked it. You weren't you anymore. You weren't...Shane," Marnie muttered, choking on her own tears. "I need you to come home,"
The older woman couldn't contain herself anymore and quietly wept, staying strong enough to not wake Jas. However, from the outside, her missing nephew linstened from the front door, forehead pressed against the oak, knowing he couldn't enter or calm his aunt's misery. He could only observe. Marnie almost lost it in her sorrow, sobbing to herself on the brink of becoming loud.
"Something keeps telling me you're out there…please, sweetie. Just give me a sign. Just let me know you're okay."
A loud thump as stones colliding rang out in front of the home. Marnie raced to her front door to locate the origin of the sound. The winds of the autumn forest slept as she peered from the door - nothing. But as Marnie went to close the door and blame the disturbance on her lack of rest, she felt the vibration of something falling to the ground. The little stone sign she had hung up, the one with the face of a cow, shattered like glass against concrete. Someone would've had to beat it with a hammer, and even then the way it splintered made it appear as if it was broken in one very violent, hard swing. Not a feat accomplished in one hit. Marnie again scanned her surroundings.
"Hello?" She uttered, almost hoping in a way, that the call for her nephew wasn't to be answered. She got her wish. Not a noise spouted as she waited for anything to answer her. Slowly, the door closed, taking Marnie's peering eyes with it.