Tough times for us Rizzles fans at the beginning of the chapter, but I promise you'll want to read all the way through :)
Maura just couldn't do it, she couldn't just stand there and let him slip away. He was such a great guy to her and she knew she found a great companion, plus she couldn't hurt him and his daughter. Allie seemed to like her so much and Maura thought at one point how impossible that could be. The way he looked at her when she was standing on his doorstep tonight. The content feeling in the way he kissed, slowly but it felt fantastic.
Jack invited her in, his daughter was sleeping and Maura stayed the night. She spent the night in Jack's arms momentarily forgetting about Jane.
The next morning she awoken and there was Jack, his fingers grazing her side, causing Maura to warm at the touch. "God, you're so beautiful in the morning. You should come over more often," he spoke softly and Maura nodded her head.
"I'd like that," Maura couldn't help herself from smiling then kissing him. The moment was short lived as her phone went off. She tried to ignore it, but it could have been work. "I should probably take that," Maura reached over on toward the bedside table. Jane's picture popped up, Maura sighed sitting up and answering. "Hey Jane."
"Maura, where are you? I came over this morning to talk... and you're not here."
"Sorry Jane, I would have been there, but I'm at Jack's place."
"Oh," she sounded defeated on the phone, breaking Maura's heart. "Well I'll just see you at work then. Bye Maur."
Before Maura could respond Jane hung up. Jack looked over at Maura in concern. "Is everything going okay with Jane?"
Maura sighed, "She's been going through a few rough patches. I should get going."
Jack nodded, "Of course," he slid out of bed to put on some clothes, handing Maura hers. He observed her get dressed and sighed. "Maura, is everything alright with you?"
"Of course Jack, why wouldn't they be?" she leaned over to kiss his cheek.
"Just curious, but you know you can talk to me if anything is going not so well."
"I know I can, but talking about Jane's issues with you seems uncomfortable," she admits and Jack nodded.
"You said you needed to get going?" he asked and she nodded.
"I'm sorry Jack, but yes I really should get going."
He ended up walking her to her car, his daughter was still sleeping. "You're more than welcome to come over again tonight, if you want."
"I'll take that into consideration," Maura smiled, leaning up to kiss Jack softly. It heated up a bit and Maura had to pull back to catch her breath.
"Maura, before you go there's something I want to tell you."
"Sure, what is it Jack?" Maura leaned against her car.
Jack shifted slightly, rubbing at the palm of his hands, something Jane did as well when she was nervous or anxious. "I know we've only been dating for about two months now but I've been trying to tell you something, I just didn't know how. I know you probably don't feel the same but I want you to know that I..." he took a deep breath before admitting his feelings. "Maura, what I'm trying to say is that... well that I love you."
Maura's heart skipped a beat, "Oh, you do?"
Jack nodded, "If you don't feel the same that's okay I just... I wanted you to know."
Maura looked up at him, biting her bottom lip. "Well it was very nice to hear. I don't get told that often. You're an amazing guy Jack, and I have this strong feeling towards you, but it's not necessarily love," she looked down now, feeling sort of guilty.
Jack took her hands in his, "And that's okay. You're such a beautiful soul and I lucked out with you. You be safe with whatever you do today."
Maura leaned up to kiss him again, her hand stroking his cheek. The kiss deepened until Maura's phone went off. It was BPD. She answered, "Isles." Jack nodded, mouthing his goodbye before going into his house. Maura watched him as she hung up the phone.
Duty calls, and that meant seeing Jane. Her mind was more focused on the confession Jack just made. She wished Jane could get the courage to discuss her feelings, just so Maura didn't keep on feeling hurt and regret. She hated being in 'emotional hell' as Jane would put it.
Maura drove to the crime scene and pulled out her phone to text Jack a short message, deciding she would do anything to get her mind off of Jane. I thought about it and yes, I'll spend the night again tonight. You and Allie have a good day.
Maura got out of her car and walked over towards Jane, Korsak, and the crime scene. Korsak looked up and greeted the medical examiner. "Doctor Isles, is that the same outfit you wore yesterday," he raised his brow in amusement and Jane huffed.
"Korsak, can we please just focus on the dead body please? Some people just want to do their work, not socialize." She spoke with such irritation that Maura just focused on the dead body on the ground
"I have no idea why you're so crabby today Jane," he whispered. "Have you been sleeping?"
"I've been sleeping just fine thank you," Jane scoffed, focusing back on their task at hand.
The rest of the day went the same, Jane with very little patience, she let Korsak go down to observe the autopsy, Jane had other things to be doing. She stopped after what seemed like hours and looked at the desk across from her. "Dammit Frost, I wish you were still here, it's seriously so miserable here without you," she sighed, leaning back in her chair, closing her eyes for a few moments, the last thing she wanted was to cry at work and have Korsak be even more concerned by it.
Jane decided that she had enough self pity for one day and just to suck it up. She went downstairs to Maura's office, she seen her packing up for the day. Jane slipped into the office and closed the door behind her. Maura jumped slightly looking up at her best friend.
"Oh hey Jane, I was just heading out."
"I can see that. Did you want to go to the Robber tonight? With me."
"I already made plans for tonight, my apologies."
Jane sighed, "With Jack I presume? Maybe you should change your clothes before you come to work again tomorrow. Korsak was very amused by your 'walk of shame' today."
"I know he was. Anything else you came to see me for?" Maura asked, shutting off her laptop.
"No, just figured that I'd ask you out... to the Dirty Robber. But since you're busy..."
Maura looked at her best friend, she really looked at her, Jane looked tired, like she hadn't been sleeping well lately. She glanced over at the clock and nodded. "I can always go to his later. Come on, I'll go with you. You know you come first, right? You always come first."
"I'm sorry for what I said last night it was selfish of me."
"Which part?"
"The whole I'm second to Jack thing, and that you should break up with him. I was being selfish, you really are happy with him, aren't you?"
"I am, he's a great guy..." Maura paused, stepping closer to Jane. "He's not you though, when I went over to his I planned to break up with him. Thought maybe you and I could be..."
Jane's heart skipped a beat, "Really?"
"Yeah, but then things happened and I just couldn't. He's so sweet and I'd feel guilty for hurting him... Jane I'm sorry."
"You're a pure soul sometimes Maura. I know you like him and don't want to hurt him, but you don't seem to realize how much it's been hurting me. That we shared a night of passion and then you just seemed to drop it, dropped me. It had to mean something, you and me or else it wouldn't have happened."
Maura lifted her hand to rest it against Jane's cheek, "It meant the world to me Jane, but we're best friends and it scared me. These feelings for you scare me, I'm not even sure how I feel about you."
Jane stepped away from Maura slightly, "These feelings scare me too, but I thought maybe we could figure it out together. That you wouldn't still be with Jack."
"Jane..."
"Don't Maura, just don't... things have already been confusing enough." Jane ran her fingers through her hair, heading for the door.
"He told me he loved me this morning," Maura blurted out as Jane's hand was on the door knob. Jane's body froze, she took a deep breath and turned to face Maura.
"He what?" she was completely shocked by Maura's words.
"I didn't say it back..."
"Why would you tell me this?"
"I just wanted you to know... to know what's going on. I don't love him Jane, I can't, not when I'm confused about how I feel for you. But he was okay that I didn't say it back."
"Maybe we need to take a break from each other Maura. You don't have to come to the Robber with me, it'll probably just make things more confusing."
"But Jane..."
"No Maura, it's for the best. Maybe until we both work out our feelings. Whatever they may be. Just, I hope Jack continues to treat you right because I'd hate to have to kick his ass," she ended with a smile, "Actually I might enjoy it, if I'm being honest."
"Jane..." she lightly scolded her friend. "You sure it's for the best, us not being around each other? It doesn't sound like the best idea."
"Well what do you prefer we do then?"
"Honestly, I haven't the slightest idea. But you're my best friend, I don't want to give you up. I can't give you up. You mean the world to me Jane Rizzoli. I need you in my life. I'd be so lost without you."
"Give yourself more credit, you'd be just fine without me."
"I wouldn't be so sure," Maura reached out to rest her hand on Jane's arm, grateful that Jane didn't pull away. "Ever since I met you the years have been so great, I really enjoy our relationship Jane, it scares me to want more. But what scares me the most is losing you. I can't imagine a life without you. You really are my best friend Jane," she spoke, tears forming in her eyes, falling down her cheeks.
Jane stepped closer to Maura, lifting her hand onto her cheek, to wipe away the tears. "You're not going to lose me Maura, it's just until we figure things out. I promise, okay?"
Maura nodded, "It still sounds like a bad idea." Her heart was racing, Jane's hand on her cheek, thumb brushing her skin. The way she was looking at her, almost the same way she looked at her the night they had sex. They stood just looking into each other's eyes, both feeling this pull towards each other. Maura's hand slid down her friend's arm grabbing hold of her hand. Jane went to link their fingers together. Both girls' hearts skipped a beat.
Jane pulled Maura close, their bodies pressed together. Jane leaned down to capture Maura's lips in a kiss, a soft kiss, nipping at her lips, causing Maura to moan quietly. A moment passed before the kiss got a little bit more intense, deeper. Jane pressed Maura slightly against the closed door, her free hand resting on Maura's hip.
The kiss only lasted a few more moments, both girls flushed, licking their lips. "Maybe you're right, maybe being apart wouldn't be the best idea," Jane admitted in a soft, yet raspy voice. "We can't keep doing this though. You need to break up with Jack, I know it's not exclusive, but I want to keep kissing you, but it's only fair to me, to Jack and his daughter if you let him go. I know you don't want to hurt him, but we both know it's for the best."
Maura nodded, "I know, I know what I need to do. It's just, it's going to be hard..." she licked her lips. "But you're worth it..."
Jane smiled, resting her hand on Maura's cheeks looking into her eyes again. "You really mean it?"
She nodded her head again, "You're my best friend, of course I mean it. Jane, are we going to be okay?"
"Yeah we're going to be okay. Did you want me to go with you... for moral support."
"This is something I need to do on my own, but thanks for the offer. Maybe I'll see you later tonight, my place?" Maura asked hopefully.
"Where my mother is? I'd prefer not to, if you don't mind."
"Your place it is then," Maura leaned up to kiss Jane's cheek. "Want to walk me to my car?"
Jane chuckled, linking her arm with Maura's. "I'd be honored to Dr. Isles. It's my duty to serve and protect gorgeous single women," she opened the office door and walked Maura to her car.
Maybe this didn't have to be so difficult after all, maybe they could work.