Chapter Nineteen: Restorations

I sat on the end of the table, feeling self-conscious; the doctors had asked me to take off my shirt so they could study my shoulder during the test. I'd already had my treatment, and it was time to see if I could go without the harness.

"Okay, so here's what I need you to do," Dr. Fujibayashi was saying as Drs. Mori and Miyamoto stood by my right shoulder. "First, I'm going to have you raise your right arm slowly, to about thirty degrees, and then I'll have you lower it. We'll do the same thing to forty-five, sixty and then ninety. If things seem to be going well, we'll try one-thirty-five. Do you understand?"

"I think so," I said, still distracted by my partial nakedness. "Couldn't one of you take off the lab coat or something? I'm feeling kinda vulnerable, here."

The four of us shared a friendly chuckle before Dr. Mori spoke. "Fair enough; I'm game." He then unbuttoned his lab coat and removed it, revealing a tan vest and white shirt with a tan tie. "That's as far as I can go, though; don't want a scandal or anything."

"Thanks, doc," I said with a chuckle. "I'm okay, actually, but thanks for humoring me."

"Are you ready, then?" Dr. Fujibayashi asked.

I took a deep breath. "Let's do it."

"Okay now; raise your right hand slowly to as close to thirty degrees as you can."

I could feel the new muscles protest as I did as I'd been instructed. "Is that right?" I asked, already feeling a little winded from the effort.

"That's fine," he replied while nodding approvingly. "Now bring it down slowly, please."

I did what he said.

"Now up to forty-five degrees. Again, slowly."

I could feel my arm shake a little as I brought my arm up, but I managed. "Okay?" I grunted.

"Good. And back down slowly…"

It took more effort to keep my arm from falling down, but I was able to lower it slowly to my side. "I'm beat; can I take a break?"

"In a minute," he said with a smile. "Now up to ninety."

"Slowly," I repeated as I started to lift my arm. It hurt, but not as bad as I thought it would. "Hey doc, I think it's working."

"It's certainly promising," Dr. Miyamoto said.

"Okay, back down now," Dr. Fujibayashi instructed.

It still hurt, but I managed to do it.

"Gentlemen, what do you think?" Dr. Fujibayashi asked the other two.

"I've seen no unusual distortion of the lateral deltoid," Dr. Mori said.

"The trapezoid seems stable as well," Dr. Miyamoto added.

Their collective gaze went to me. "What do you think?" Dr. Fujibayashi asked. "Do you think you're ready?"

"Why are you asking me?" I said. "You're the experts here."

'But you ultimately know how you feel," Dr. Mori told me.

I considered his words, then closed my eyes and focused on my right shoulder. It felt sore, but it felt more like a soreness from lack of use rather than an injury. So, I opened my eyes. "I want to try," I told them.

"Okay," Dr. Fujibayashi said, and I could tell that he was trying to contain his excitement. "So, slowly raise your arm to one-hundred and thirty-five degrees," he instructed, raising his own arm to demonstrate. "Mori, be ready to catch his arm if it gives out."

"Got it."

"Okay, Okazaki-san; whenever you're ready."

I took a deep breath; if I succeeded, I would be doing something that I hadn't been able to do in years. "And…liftoff," I said quietly as I started to raise my arm again. It passed thirty degrees, then forty-five, and I stopped at ninety.

"Take your time," Dr. Miyamoto encouraged.

I took another deep breath, only for it to sputter into tears as I lifted my arm above the level of my shoulder…without pain. "I don't believe it…" I shuddered. "It doesn't hurt… I don't… It's been twenty years since…"

My strength gave out as I broke down crying, and I could feel my arm cradled as it started to fall back to my side. I could then feel reassuring hands on my back and shoulders. I didn't care that I was half-naked; it felt so good to be touched by people who cared about me.

"Well done!" Dr. Fujibayashi exclaimed excitedly as I held my right hand up over my head. "How are you feeling?"

"A little stiff," I said as I brought my arm back down, slowly. "And…a little drained."

"Twenty years is a long time to be without your full range of motion," Dr. Miyamoto said quietly. "Ah, well; that's why people like us get into this profession."

"Hear, hear," Dr. Mori chimed in.

"Now this might sound like a setback, but I'd like you to wear the harness at night," Dr. Fujibayashi told me. "Your shoulder and arm are still very vulnerable right now, and will be until they've been strengthened enough."

"Understood," I said with a nod. "What about other times, like work?"

"I'd like you to have the harness off as much as possible from now on," he replied. "This will be partly at your discretion, though; if you start to feel pain, then secure it as soon as possible. If the pain is sharp or otherwise unusual, come see us immediately."

"Understood."

"Go ahead and get your stuff on, and we'll see you out."

I blinked; normally I'd see myself out, but this time… "You're seeing me out this time?"

"Why not?" Dr. Mori said with a handclap. "Today has seen a momentous occasion. We may not be able to take you to lunch or anything, but we would consider it an honor to see you to the entrance."

"An honor…" I liked the idea, to be sure, but I still felt a little awkward. Well… "Lead the way, guys," I said as I finished shrugging into my coat.

They walked with me to the entrance and blinked at the sunlight. "We need to get out more," Dr. Mori remarked. "It's a beautiful day."

"Agreed," Dr. Fujibayashi grunted. "Okay Okazaki-san, we'll want you to come for the next two to three Saturdays. After that we'll go to every other week, eventually to once a month."

"How long will that go on?" I asked, starting to feel overwhelmed.

"It'll be based on your progress," Dr. Miyamoto replied. "If your recovery is quick, we could be done in six months. In the end it'll be due to your level of commitment and the recuperative abilities of your body. We'll continue the stim treatments, of course, but they'll be more of a supplement than the main method of regeneration."

"I think I get it," I said, rotating my new shoulder and enjoying the feeling of pulling muscle fibers. "So I'll see you next week, then?"

"Next week," Dr. Fujibayashi confirmed, then turned to his associates. "Let's go for a walk, gentlemen; I think Okazaki-san isn't the only one who could use some fresh air."

The other two grunted their agreement, and the three of them headed toward a nearby park, waving as they left.

I smiled as I returned their gestures, then headed for the train station to head home.

As I neared the station, however, I got the feeling that I was being followed again. My shoulder didn't ache or itch, so the feeling worried me. I stopped and looked around, only to find nothing unusual; people were walking around, of course, but no one appeared to be acting suspicious. I shook my head to try and clear it as I continued to the station. I boarded the train and took a seat; with my shoulder the way it was, I still didn't want to rely on it for stability.

The nagging feeling left shortly before my stop, and I got off the train and headed home. Once there I let myself in, and after I shut the door behind me I just…stopped. I felt like I was looking at my home with new eyes as I looked around. And maybe I did have new eyes; getting my shoulder back made me a new man, in a sense. I was no longer burdened with the curse that had come with all those fights with my old man. I felt like the old Okazaki Tomoya was gone, and I had a chance to choose what the new Okazaki Tomoya would be like…

And then my eyes settled on the photo of Nagisa and I. I had married her when my shoulder was still busted; if I was a new Tomoya, did that mean that she was no longer part of me? Did I 'divorce' her as part of my recovery? Maybe I'd lost more than I gained by getting my shoulder fixed. I shook my head, filing the thoughts for later as I headed down the hall, into my room, and carefully rolled onto my futon for a much-needed nap.

I smiled as I pushed the door open to Furukawa Bakery. Even though I'd be seeing her in less than half an hour, I really wanted to show Ushio my arm before our appointment.

"Ah! Tomoya-san!" Sanae greeted from behind the register. "Are you here to see Shio-chan?"

"If you don't mind," I said. "I'd like to show her something before our session."

"Daddy!" I heard my daughter cry before she barreled out of the door at the back of the bakery, stopping just before she collided with me. "Hiiiiiii! What…What are you doing here?"

I said nothing, but smiled as I carefully raised my right arm above the level of my shoulder.

Her jaw dropped at almost the same rate. "You…It…It worked?!"

I still said nothing, but grunted a little as I continued to raise my arm, all the way up over my head.

Her hands flew to her mouth as her breathing quickened. "Oh…Ohmygosh…Daddy, you…."

"What is it?" Sanae said, stepping from behind the counter. "Oh my… Is…Is that your injured shoulder?"

"It was," I said, smile still in place.

"Oh Daddy…" Ushio whimpered. "I'm…so…happy…" She burst into tears and nearly fell into me, wrapping her arms around my waist as she cried.

I felt the pressure behind my eyes as well as I smiled over at Sanae. "I'm free," I said through a tightened throat.

"You are," she sniffed, tears spilling from her eyes as she reached out to rest her hand against my cheek.

"What's going on?" I looked up to see Pops standing just inside the bakery, bat on his shoulder. "Oh, your shoulder works again? That's good. You ready to play baseball for real, now?"

The three of us looked at each other before laughing more loudly than any of us probably had in a long time.

I smiled – smirked, almost – as I approached the doors to the church and knocked.

A minute later, one of the doors opened to reveal Pastor Ashton. "Ah, good afternoon, Tomoya-san! You're pretty early, but come in!"

"Thanks," I said as I carefully reached out with my right hand to take hold of the door.

"Oh…" he said, clearly noticing. "Your…shoulder works?"

"Yup," I grunted.

"That's just…" he gestured at me as I passed through the doorway. "That's just amazing. Good for you, Tomoya-san. I just can't find the words to express how happy I am for you." I saw him pat his chest several times. "I feel like the Grinch, when his heart grew threefold."

"The Grinch?" The name sounded familiar, but…

"Literary character. I just mean that my heart feels so big right now because of how happy I am for you."

"Oh. Well, thanks."

"So, how high can you raise it?"

I allowed myself to feel a little bit of pride as I carefully raised my hand up over my head for the third time that day.

"Praise Jesus…" he breathed as he looked up at my upstretched hand. "Thank you, Lord Jesus, for your knowledge and wisdom and mercy."

I wasn't sure what to say to that as I slowly lowered my hand again. "They, uh….The doctors, I mean… they want me to wear the harness at night when I'm sleeping, but otherwise they want me using my shoulder as much as possible to work on strengthening it."

"Good for you, Tomoya-san; I can't tell you how happy I am for you. This shoulder was injured a long time ago, right?"

"About twenty years ago, yeah."

"How does it make you feel, having your range of movement back?" he asked, still studying my shoulder.

"To be honest, I cried like a baby when I raised my arm above the level of my shoulder," I admitted with a teary chuckle. "Aw, man; here I go again."

"It's not unmanly to cry if it's something worth crying over," he told me with a warm smile. "And I think that the restoration of one's body is a very good reason."

"Yeah, me too," I agreed, wiping my nose with the back of my hand. "Ugh, could I have a tissue?"

He laughed out loud. "Come on; let's go to my office. That's where I keep my main stash."

I chuckled as I followed him down the familiar halls to his familiar office. Once there, he went behind his desk and produced a box of tissues. "Take as many as you need," he said with a wink. "You've earned them."

"Thanks. Hey look, this might not be the best time, but could I get your opinion on something?"

"I'm always happy to give my opinion," he said with another wink.

I chuckled before the weight of what I wanted to ask about settled on my shoulders…both of them, finally. "I, uh, was invited to a…get-together…by a girl."

"You were, huh?" he said, growing serious. "Did you accept?"

"Yeah," I grunted, looking at the floor.

"Was it the girl you were talking about last time? Kyou's…niece?"

My gaze snapped up to his. "How did you know?"

"I didn't," he shrugged. "But she's the only one you've mentioned so far, so I figured she was a good bet. Anyway…"

"Yeah…she invited me to the Founder's Festival at Hikarizaka High School, where she's a student."

"And you accepted."

"Yeah…" Man, I was starting to sound dumb; 'yeah…yeah…yeah…'. "She told me that her parents were working and couldn't go, so she asked me."

"What about friends? She couldn't go with friends?" he asked with a puzzled look.

"I didn't think to ask," I admitted. "She just seemed so sad, that…well, I gave in."

"Of course she'd be sad," he remarked. "She's the one who's fond of you, right?"

"Right," I replied, opting to not use 'yeah' again. "Any thoughts?"

"Well, that would depend on your stance on remarriage," he said, leaning back in his chair and steeping his fingers.

"Huh?" Had I heard him right? "Are you seriously suggesting that I think of her as a possible…wife?"

"I'm not suggesting anything," he said smoothly, "other than that you might want to be very careful in accepting invitations like this one. I'm assuming that you don't want to give her the wrong idea."

"I don't."

"So, if you're still not interested in remarrying," he said, spreading his hands, "then you might want to seriously reconsider your acceptance of her invitation."

"Remarrying…" I murmured.

"Something you want to add, Tomoya-san?"

"I just…" I couldn't believe what I was feeling. "You know…a while ago I think I finally grieved Nagisa's death."

"How?"

"I cried like a little girl," I said with an awkward chuckle. "All those years of pain…they're not quite gone, but…"

"They're a lot weaker, now?"

"Yeah, that's it," I said, pointing at him. "They're weaker, and I feel like I can think more clearly now."

"If it helps, I went through something similar after Jessica died," he told me. "I'm in no danger of breaking your record, but I really hurt for a long time."

"Did your god help you through it?"

"He did," he replied. "To the best of my understanding, death was not in his original plan, but the introduction of sin – a spiritual death – also allowed the entrance of physical death into creation. Had Adam and Eve not sinned, we likely would have lived forever as perfect beings; now we'll live forever either with God or separated from him."

"What does that have to do with your wife?"

"Well, it made it harder for me to blame him for her death. In a sense, I envy her; she's closer to him now than I am. Anyway, he helped me to deal with the pain of my loss. In fact a friend of mine loaned me a copy of 'A Grief Observed' by C.S. Lewis; helped me immensely."

"How?"

"He wrote the book in response to his own pain at the loss of his wife, so we were kindred spirits, in a way."

"I'm glad you had someone, at least; all I had was booze, cigarettes, and work."

"I wish I could have met you sooner," he said with genuine regret in his voice. "Maybe I could have helped you through all your pain."

"Maybe," I grunted. I still wasn't big on his god, but at least the pastor's heart seemed to be in the right place. "So, what do you think I should do about Mik- I mean, Kyou's niece?"

"Oh! Right…" he sat up in his seat, steepling his fingers again. "If you're interested in marrying again, I'd say go for it; otherwise, find a polite way to back out. I don't think I'll be able to help you with that, though," he admitted with a sympathetic smile.

"Go for it?" I repeated. "Are you serious? She's eighteen." I waved a hand at him. "Doesn't your god have some kind of restrictions when it comes to stuff like this?"

"Just when it comes to family members," he replied. "Outside of that there are cultural norms and local laws that we're required to adhere to…as long as they don't contradict his laws."

"Are you saying that I could date an eighteen-year-old and you'd be fine with it?"

"Personally, I'm a little uncomfortable with the idea," he admitted. "But that would be based on my own opinion, not my understanding of scripture."

"But you just said 'go for it'," I countered.

"Again, that was based on my understanding of scripture. I don't know all the details of your situation beyond what you've told me. As far as I know, you're both legal adults and capable of consent. If marriage ever came up, she'd need her parents' permission due to being under the age of twenty, but…" he spread his hands. "As far as I'm concerned this is between the two of you."

I sighed as I weakly rubbed my face with my hand, then smiled briefly when I realized that I'd used my right hand. "All right, I think I get it. How far apart in age were you and your wife, anyway?"

"I was older than Jessica by about two years," he told me.

"All right…" I grunted. "Thanks."

"I would strongly recommend that you talk with her parents about this event, just in case; they may not be aware of her plans."

"Knowing her, she's probably told them, but I think you're right; I should talk to them about it."

He gave me a sympathetic smile. "Was there anything else?" he asked softly.

"No," I grunted again. "Despite how I sound, you've been a huge help. Thanks."

"I'm glad to have helped," he said, then a knock sounded from down the hall, and I marveled at how we could hear it from so far away. "Excuse me a minute," he said, checking the clock as he got to his feet. "I think this'll be a familiar face."

"All right," I chuckled as he left the room.

A couple of minutes later he came back with Ushio in tow. "Daddy!" she squealed as she lunged at me to hug my neck."Your shoulder! Your shoulder!"

"Yes, it's still working," I chuckled as I returned my hyper teenager's embrace.

"She knows already?" he asked as he moved behind his desk to sit.

"Yeah, I stopped by the bakery one my way here; I wanted Ushio to be the first to know."

"Well, that was thoughtful. How does it feel being the first to know?" he asked my daughter.

"Really good!" she chirped, finally releasing me. "Thank you, Daddy, for thinking of me."

"You're welcome," I said, feeling a little overwhelmed by her exuberance. "Go ahead and sit down."

Once we were both settled in, the pastor smiled at the both of us. "Well, I received an interesting call this morning…"

Ushio and I exchanged a glance. "Okay…" I said. "Good for you?"

He burst out laughing. "What would you say if I told you that, after reviewing your case along with my notes, the court has decided that you, Shio-chan, are clear to move back in with your father?"

"I…would say that I'm very happy," she said in a voice that matched the trembling of her body. "I've…been wanting to be a family again ever since…" she trailed off, and I had an idea what she was referring to.

"I get the feeling that these sessions have been more of a formality than anything," Pastor Ashton remarked. "You were eager to get back on track after all that. Still, laws and procedures have to be followed, and I think we've done that quite well."

"I think so, too," I agreed.

"Me, too," Ushio echoed.

"So, when do you think you'll be moving in?" he asked.

She shifted in her seat. "I'm…not sure. I mean, you just told us the good news, after all, so… I'll have to work things out with Daddy and Grandpa and Grandma Furukawa."

"Are your grandparents going to be sad to see you go?"

"I'm sure they will be, a little," she replied. "They took care of me when…" she trailed off as she glanced at me anxiously.

"Ah, right; I remember. Right. No need to bring it up now." I figured she was talking about her first five years of life, so I was grateful for their discretion.

"And I've become part of the routine, so I'm sure they'll miss that part of it, too," she added.

"That's true; your grandpa won't have you around to clean the floors for him anymore," I said with a smirk.

"Yeah…" she giggled.

"Well, the four of you can work that out on your own," he said as he leaned back in his chair. "I'm outside that discussion, but know that you can reunite whenever you're ready."

"Thank you, pastor," I said. "Do Mom and Dad Furukawa know yet?"

"I haven't told them, no," he replied. "I'll let them know when they come for Shio-chan, and you can go from there."

"It'll be nice to able to walk alone with Daddy again," Ushio said, smiling at me warmly. "I've missed that."

"Tell you what," Pastor Aston said, reaching for his phone. "I'll give them a call right now and tell them the news; knowing them, they'll want the two of you to walk home alone together." For some reason, his forehead wrinkled. "'Alone together'…that sounds weird."

"It does," Ushio giggled.

"Anyway, give me a minute." He picked up his phone and dialed a number before putting the phone to his head. "Hello? Sanae-san? Hi, Pastor Jeff Ashton, Glory to God church. Yeah… Good, thank you. Listen, I'm calling to let you know that Ushio is free to move back in with her old man at your discretion…the four of you, that is. At the four of you's… Yes. Thank you, and sorry about the word salad." He gave us an embarrassed look, causing me to chuckle and Ushio to giggle. "I was thinking that you might like Tomoya-san to walk your granddaughter back to your place, since they haven't been able to walk together, just the two of them, in a long time." I heard Sanae's excited voice on the other end, and figured she was fine with it. "Great. Thank you, ma'am. Yes. Take care." He hung up and gave us a broad smile while shaking his head. "I haven't fumbled like that in a while, but I'm usually by myself when I'm on the phone. Anyway, you're free to walk your daughter to the bakery…or wherever you like, really, but I think Sanae-san would want to know for her own peace of mind."

"For now, I'll just take her home," I said. "To the bakery, I mean; we still have arrangements to make."

"Of course," he said, getting up from his chair. "Well, if you don't need anything from me, I think we can call it good." He bowed, then stuck out his hand. "Do you mind? It gives me the sense of closure. You can take the man out of America, but…"

"No, it's fine," I said, standing to carefully accept the handshake with my right hand, and it felt good. "Thanks for all your help, pastor."

"I'm glad to have helped," he said warmly. He glanced over at Ushio briefly before addressing me. "If you're willing, Tomoya-san, I'd like to continue with you, though."

"Me?" He gave me a meaningful look, and I immediately knew what he was talking about. "I'll…think about it," I said, feeling self-conscious.

"What is it, Daddy?"

"I apologize for bringing it up in front of others," he said, "but I wasn't sure when I'd get the chance."

"No, it's fine," I said. "I'll…just want a little time to think about it."

"Perfectly understandable," he replied as he opened the door to his office and led us out. The three of us said nothing as we headed down the hallways to the entrance to the church. "Well," he said, breaking the silence as he opened one of the main doors for us. "Take care, and if I don't see you again Tomoya-san; may Jesus guide your steps."

"Yeah…thanks." I still wasn't sure what to say to his odd declarations. "Take it easy."

"May your god guide you," Ushio said with a bow, causing my eyebrows to jump.

"Thank you, Shio-chan," he replied, returning the bow. "May Jesus guide you as well."

We waved as we headed away from the church, then turned our attention to the road ahead of us. "He's a nice man," she said. "I'm glad he was willing to help us."

"Yeah, he's all right," I grunted. Wanting to change the subject, I tried to think of something else to talk about and cringed. Oh, well; I'd want to talk to her about it at some point anyway. "Hey…listen, Ushio…?"

"Yes, Daddy?"

"Your upperclassman, Hiiragi Mika-san, invited me to the Founder's Festival. I guess both her parents are working and can't go with her, so she asked me."

"That's odd," she said, putting a finger to her mouth, "it's not required for parents to go."

"I didn't think so," I said. "Back when I attended it wasn't required, but I guess I assumed that that had changed or something."

"Not as far as I know," she said with a shrug. "Well, that's a shame, though…"

"How come?"

She ducked her head with a shy smile. "I was going to ask you to come with me…"

YES! I had an out!

"…but I guess the three of us could go together."

'DAMMMIT' my mind said. "That's an idea…" my traitorous mouth said.

"Did you already agree to go?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah, I did. I didn't know we'd be cleared today, or I would have told her 'no'." We rounded the corner, coming up on the bakery. "Well, I'll be talking to her parents tonight, so maybe one of them will be able to go instead."

"If it doesn't work out, could she go with us?" she asked. "She must have asked you because she trusts you, and I'd hate to let her down. And she's done so much for you, that…" she trailed off with a sheepish smile.

Trusts me… "I…Fine." I briefly considered telling Ushio about my suspicions regarding her senior, but thought better of it.

"Hey, Okazaki!"

"Kappei!" I greeted, a little more boisterously than my usual. "Your daughter's on her way home, but… Hey, uh…how's life?"

"Busy," he groaned. "I'm coaching track teams for the next three weeks straight! I know they're getting ready for regionals, but still… THERE'S ONLY ONE OF ME!"

I laughed, even as I pulled my phone away from my ear; talking with the energetic track star was always a blast. "That sounds rough," I chuckled sympathetically.

"So, what's up with you?"

"Well, I don't know if you know this, but your daughter asked me to go to the Founder's Festival with her."

"Yeah, she talked with us about it. Unfortunately, I can't get away from these training sessions, and Ryou has training on new hospital procedures the whole time. We might be able to go toward the end of Sunday, but…yeah, it sucks."

"Sorry to hear that," I said; I could tell from his tone that he really wanted to go. "Well, I said I'd go with her. Ushio'll be with us too, so she'll be have someone more her age as well."

"That's good. Listen Okazaki; I really appreciate you putting yourself out there for her. She really looks up to you."

"I get that; thanks."

"No problem! Shoot, she talks about you all the time, anyway. I guess it's no surprise with how much she's over there, huh?"

"Y-Yeah… I guess it makes sense." I started to wonder if I should have told him about Kyou's suspicions, but realized that I could end up causing unnecessary problems if they turned out to be wrong. "Well, I just wanted to know if you knew about Mika-san's plans," I said, then cringed at the implications in light of Kyou's suspicions.

"Yup, we know about it. I'll let you know if things change and we can take her off your hands, but…"

"I get it. Thanks, Kappei."

"No problem. I just feel bad that you have to play 'dad' for her."

"Y-Yeah… No, I mean, don't worry about it. I…I understand."

"Cool! Well…anything else?"

"Nope. She's on her way home, and I'm going back to school."

As expected, I heard laughter from the other end. "You're something else, you know that? All right, catch you later, man."

"Take it easy."

I ended the call, cursing my cowardice until I realized that I'd forgotten to tell him about my shoulder. Oh, well…