Content warning: mental breakdowns, self-destructive behavior, dissociation
Memory teleported to the forest and bolted through the trees, a cacophony of thunder following him. He fell to his knees and clenched his ears, hating the thunder for telling the entire world his misery, and hating himself more for not having the strength to silence it. He felt exposed. Putting on the mask and hiding in this forest wouldn't matter.
I made everything worse.
Never before had he seen Illusion lose his mind under Galaxy's connection. The pain and desperation in his voice was unforgettable.
How did this happen? He knew the answer: the talk with Galaxy. Why did he pressure Galaxy to talk about their past? Why couldn't he have just shrugged off Galaxy admitting he only saw him as a tool? If he had remembered that Void was gone and he could move on from the fears holding him back, that talk would have been different. But instead, Memory had failed the very thing he had planned to: make Galaxy see him as a person so Illusion could accept the memories.
I should had been there to comfort him. Memory teared up more. But even when my friend's memories are at stake, I still mess up talking to people. Illusion's words and Galaxy's panicked apology replayed in his mind. He wished he could go back and prevent this mess. But the raw truth couldn't be changed; Illusion saw him as an enemy now. And he was right.
"Memory!" Someone called out.
Memory quickly dried his eyes. Time was racing towards him. Memory jumped to his feet and ran the other way, concealing his expression by putting on the mask.
"Wait, Memory!"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Memory whimpered, trying to see through his teary eyes to teleport deeper into the forest. "I'll leave now."
Time teleported behind him. "No, you don't have to," he insisted, his words shaking. "I asked Sabre and Alex to give Galaxy a pep talk. He will feel better! I know you didn't mean to cause all that chaos."
"But I did anyways..."
"I know things are tense between you two, but I don't think Galaxy hates you or fears you. I think he's more reminded of his own guilt, not all the bad things you did."
"All the more reason why I should go." Memory turned around. "Just focus on the machine and let me know when you need me again."
"If you don't come with me now, there won't be a machine left," Time said, all gentle optimism gone in his voice.
Memory flinched and faced Time. "...what?"
The stress on Time's face renewed. "Illusion broke out of my frozen time state. He's still in distress, and he's taking it out on the machine."
Time and Memory entered the cobblestone room. Hostile thunder echoed against the walls. Illusion hovered in the center of the room, his enraged expression peering at the backup machine. After another roar of thunder, the machine's illusion block pillars began to shake. Pink cracks carved into the pillars and tiny particles began breaking off.
"Illusion!" Memory bolted to the center. His panic cut through his sobs and cleared his lungs of tears. "What are you doing?!"
"Back off!" Illusion threw a pink blast at him, shoving Memory back. "Don't distract me!"
"Freeze!" Time yelled. Punctual, chilling thunder yawned to life and clashed against the commotion.
With a glare, Illusion formed a holographic puzzle piece. The piece grew and duplicated until it surrounding him in a pink cube. The thunder dulled, as if the room had been encased in foam. The backup machine stopped shuddering.
Illusion spread his hands out, one pointing at the machine and the other at Time. The backup machine shuddered again and the cube created a protective gleam. Time commanded his powers again. The machine and the cube took turns breaking down. Every time the machine stopped shuddering or the cube threatened to drop a piece, Illusion grimaced and pushed his powers further.
"Illusion, enough!" Memory shouted. He hated it when his cousin overworked himself. It was even worse that he was exerting himself to stop Time, who just wanted to help.
Illusion flicked his hand and the cube fired out pink chains. Time's eyes glowed. "Watch out!" He pushed Memory out of the way and dodged the striking chains. Memory lost his balance and fell, a pink chain soaring above him.
"Just let me do this!" Illusion demanded. "This machine has been nothing but a waste of time. If there is no backup machine, then Memory has nothing to be happy about, and whoever is Galaxy's biggest threat doesn't need happiness."
"Illusion, do you even hear yourself?!" Time cried.
Memory scrambled up and joined Time's side. "How can I help?!"
"Can you use your time powers?"
Memory gulped. "I, well – I'm not good at it. I'm honestly only good for shooting arrows and – "
"There's no time for doubting!" Time grabbed Memory and brought him closer, his eyes wide and pleading. "Can you use the powers?!"
"You never saw me use my time powers before!"
"It shouldn't matter! Your strength and accomplishments aren't defined by who sees your powers and what they think of it. I asked for your help because I already believe you're capable! I could get my mimics to help, but that would divide my power. I need you to freeze or reverse the destruction of the machine, so that I can focus all my power on calming down Illusion. Can you do that?"
"I – "
"If you won't do it for me, then do it for him." Time pointed at Illusion, who still struggled to simultaneously keep up the pink cube and attack the machine. For a moment, he looked like the Illusion Memory knew. The Illusion who refused to give up when Void was on the brink of returning. The Illusion who would give it his all and withstand anything if it meant protecting his family.
Two arrows formed in Memory's fists. He flicked the arrows as if they were blades, sparks flying as they ignited with golden light. He attached the arrows to his forming clock mask and nodded. Time gave a nod back, beaming with pride. The two cousins turned to Illusion and brought their hands forth.
"Reverse!" Memory ordered as Time said, "Freeze!" Two rolling drums of thunder bounced in the room with synchronized intent.
"No, stop!" Illusion swung his arm to enforce a protective sheen around his cube. The machine shuddered as the cracks in its pillars mended instead of stretched. "You guys don't realize what you're doing!"
Memory swallowed his pity. "Reverse!" He said again, mending the cracks more. He tensed when Illusion's power in the pillars fought against his. Can someone fight the fate of being reversed in time? Memory didn't need the answer. All he needed to do right now was plant his feet, concentrate his energy, and keep this machine safe.
Illusion stared worriedly at the machine, and his protective cube flickered away. Time flew to meet Illusion's level. Illusion spun towards him and shot pink chains. With his eyes glowing again, Time leapt and dived in the air, each chain missing him. Illusion formed another puzzle piece. Time darted forward and grabbed him in a trap-hug. A new cube formed, encasing both brothers.
Illusion squirmed out of the embrace, crashing into the cube's wall. The cube slowly warped, shrinking Time's side of the cube. The older Steve whispered, "Reverse," and cube expanded to its previous size.
"Listen to me!" Time's eyes glowed and Illusion stiffened, his eyes slightly glowing too. "I know you predict what might happen based on your analysis, but I can actually see paths to the future. Can't you see that destroying the machine won't help anyone?"
Illusion seemed to relax a bit. But when he blinked, the glow in his eyes fading, he shoved Time into the wall. Illusion tried to split the cube in half, but the arrows on Time's mask swirled counterclockwise, keeping the cube as is.
"Illusion, I promise Memory isn't a threat. We need the machine to help him and Sabre. Why do you want to make your cousin unhappy and prevent us from helping Galaxy's friend?"
"What's the point of helping Sabre with his problems if the root problem of everything is Memory? I want to do something about him, but I'm trapped in this dimension, so what else can I do but destroy a machine that benefits him?"
"We still need it for Sabre. Please don't ruin our work."
"There's no point in helping Sabre without dealing with Memory!" Illusion clenched his head with both hands. "I predict if Memory isn't dealt with soon, he'll cause more harm. He'll use the machine first. What if after he gets what he wants, he causes trouble for us before we can help Sabre?"
Time stepped forward. "That's not true. It won't happen."
"Guardian and Alex might beg to differ. Last time they teamed up with Memory, he made everything worse. You showed me it happened in the past."
Time's eyes widened. "I don't understand. You don't even accept the past as your memories. How can you see it as objective evidence against Memory then?"
"You wouldn't understand what I've analyzed!" Illusion snapped. He aimed his hand at the machine again, and Memory braced himself. The hostile energy in the pillars was already feeling alive.
"Freeze!" Time ordered.
Illusion summoned a force field inside the cube. "Please!" Despite the thunder echoing in the cube, the shake in Illusion's voice was loud and clear. "I don't want to talk anymore! I want to do something. I have to."
Crack.
Memory gasped when the pillars cracked. He cried out, "Reverse!" but the guilt in his chest was stronger than the power running through him. How long could they keep this stalemate up? How long could Illusion endure feeling whatever he was experiencing? Memory knew they couldn't let Illusion destroy the machine, but it was painful to see him like this.
He was so worried about assisting Time and making things right, that Memory didn't realize what he was doing wrong until now. That was always his problem, and he couldn't take it anymore.
Memory sighed and dropped his hand, turning away from the machine. Illusion perked up, his eyes wide and frantic. He aimed his hands and the machine flared bright pink.
"NO, DON'T!" Time screamed.
Memory teleported onto the roof of the cube. With Illusion distracted, he phased through the cube with ease and landed next to Time. "Freeze!" He shouted when the force field disappeared.
Illusion snapped his attention back to Memory in alarm before freezing. He tried to budge, but Time, equally baffled, also raised his hands and said, "Freeze!" Illusion stilled, and the pink gleam on the machine faded.
"What are you doing?!" Time demanded. "You were supposed to protect the machine!"
Memory winced. His certainty vaporized, but he held on to whatever was left on it. "I'm sorry! I just – the way you were handling him was wrong!" Memory raised his voice, making Time jolt. "It was wrong! I couldn't stand seeing him like that."
"YOU'RE ONE TO TALK," Time snapped.
Memory stumbled back, pain and guilt striking him like a knife.
Time gasped. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean that! Just..." He sighed, readjusting his silver monocle. "I can't stand it either. I don't want to argue with him."
"I don't want to either. But the more we fight him, the more he pushes himself, trying to deal with both of us."
"We were helping him by – "
"He thought destroying the machine would help him, and we were stopping him from doing that without offering another solution."
"What else can we do?! He won't listen to us when we tell him destroying the machine won't help."
"He probably thought we weren't listening to him either."
Time drew out a breath, lowering his head. "How did you do it, Memory? I feel like every time I help, I let him down with promises I don't even know will come true. You're better at this."
Memory looked away in shame. "I'm not better. You're a saint compared to me. All I know is that I want to listen to Illusion. I don't want to fight him. I want to comfort him. Help him."
Illusion squirmed a bit. His fingers twitched and sent pink sparks as he mumbled, "Must...do something." Both cousins whispered, "Freeze," to still him again.
It was sad that Memory had gotten used to Illusion's overachieving sprees. Wanting to take over the Spirit World. Wanting to make the world perfect. Wanting to risk his life to escape this world. Memory was glad he was there to make sure Illusion didn't overwork himself or wallow in his shortcomings.
Time turned to Memory. There was worry in his eyes, but also hope and desperation. "Alright, let's help him...your way. What should we do?"
"Illusion doesn't trust us because he doesn't have his memories. He used to come to me for advice, and when I tried to bring back Void, he came to you for help on stopping me. His memories taught him that we were people he could go to. I can't wait anymore...I'm restoring his memories."
Time did a double take. "Are you sure?"
"If Illusion doesn't want to work on the machine because of me, that's fine. I'll give his memories back without it." Memory hoped Time could sense his pleading look underneath the two masks. "He'll only stop and listen to us if he knows we're people he can trust. If I give him his memories, he'll understand."
"You believe that will comfort him?"
"Only if I return his memories slowly instead of instantly – something I've never done before." After he admitted that out loud, the dread in his stomach felt heavier. "He'll relax with new information to analyze. If I give the memories slowly, he'll feel relaxed for longer since he'll always have new things to analyze."
All Time could do was stare open-mouthed. "If you do this, you'll forget about him."
Memory sighed. "Only because of a drawback that I've struggled to overcome for generations...until perhaps today. I'm going to try delivering his memories without losing my own. I'll figure out a way."
"You feel ready?"
Memory despawned his clock mask. Time huffed as he exerted more power to cover for Memory. "No, I don't feel ready. Can you protect the backup machine? In case things don't go well, I can at least recover the memories in that machine later. I'll be unable to help reverse time while I'm restoring memories, but I hope once I calm Illusion, he'll put up less of a fight against you."
Time nodded. "I'll protect it."
Memory took off his mask, feeling embarrassed to ask. "Can you also tell me you believe in me? I...need someone else to do the believing for me."
"I believe in you. And regardless of what happens, I will make sure you are safe and ok."
Memory smiled, his eyes watering. He couldn't believe how overwhelmed he felt, but that proved Time's words gave him the strength to achieve the impossible. Hopefully.
"Now go. Save him." Time exited the cube and flew down.
"Ugh..." Illusion groaned, twitching his fingers and eventually shaking his arms awake. Memory silently teleported behind his cousin, who was looking around. "Where did they go?"
Memory grabbed Illusion in an embrace, causing him to yelp and squirm in his hold. He pressed a hand into Illusion's head. Red petals sprouted underneath his palm and glowed fiercely, consuming his vision and making the world fade away. The only thing he sensed was dread, but also the hope that he would soon reunite with his cousin.
He already regretted saying goodbye to Illusion when he was convinced that Void would come back. He couldn't bare the idea of doing it again.
No. This wasn't goodbye. This wasn't a sacrifice.
This was Memory's ultimate mission. To save the one he loved most.
Memory arrived in a place engulfed in a yellow haze. He flicked his hands, and the haze backed away, revealing a pathway of dry soil and pulled, dead roots. He followed the path, more of the haze clearing as he walked.
"I will help him." He had never voiced his confident thoughts before. Perhaps saying them aloud – to somehow make them come true – was what he had been missing all along. "And I will remember him. I'll save us both."
A large panel emerged from the haze, floating in the pale space. Memory craned his neck to get a clearer view of the panel, which displayed the cobblestone room and backup machine, all tinted with pink. Illusion's hand appeared, sending attacks to the machine.
Time, small in the panel's view and near the machine, perked up. "Wait, I have a device on me!" He took out a pocket watch, activated it, and set it on the cage. Illusion fired a pink chain at the watch. The watch glitched and exploded, knocking Time back.
Memory turned away from the panel and continue walking. Time will be fine. He can handle it, unlike me – He forced that thought to stop.
Soon, at the end of the path, Illusion appeared. He was pacing, surrounded by a storm of puzzle pieces. "What if I...ah – !" He winced when a puzzle piece struck him like a paper cut. "No, there's gotta be a better idea. I need the one idea. The idea that can make everything perfect."
"Illusion!" Memory called out.
Illusion spun around and stiffened. Memory felt nervous as his cousin studied his unmasked face. Illusion widened his eyes and jumped into a defensive pose, the storm of puzzle pieces forming a shield in front of him. "Get out of my head!"
"Wait, please!" Memory knew this wasn't the Illusion who trusted him and realized how much he was cared for. But surely he had to hear the desperation and concern in his voice. "Yes, I know, I erase memories and you don't trust me, but I'm already in your head. If I wanted to take more memories, I would have done it by now."
Illusion didn't lower his stance. "Then why are you here?"
"I just want to talk. What are you doing?"
"Trying to figure out how to make Galaxy happy. The only option I have is destroying the machine, but Time is stopping me from doing that."
"Your only option? How so?"
"Time won't let me go to the Overworld until I regain my memories." Illusion paced around while stomping. "He convinced me to maintain the backup machine, saying it was the best for me and everyone Galaxy cares for. But now I know Galaxy gets uncomfortable when he's around you, I got a headache, and Time was wrong all along. I'm already sick of looking at the machine." He huffed and sat down on the dry path. "I feel horrible, because I do have good memories about the machine. I enjoyed figuring out how it worked. I enjoyed the time you visited and taught me how to paint my first pin." He ended that comment with a smile. "But now I think of those good times as a waste, working on something that didn't benefit Galaxy."
"I'm sorry you feel that way. It sounds like you hate failures, because you don't want your work to be for nothing, correct?"
"Yeah...I can't stand the idea of messing up and going back to square one."
Memory sighed. "You don't know me, but I do know you. I've seen you try different ways to make Galaxy happy, and not all of your attempt went well. But that didn't stop you from achieving greatness or being worthy of respect. You became wiser, knowing what decisions to avoid entirely and being open to change. You became less agitated about wasting time, and you accomplished more because of that."
Illusion perked up. "That...sounds great. Well, I guess from this experience, I know helping Galaxy indirectly through his loved ones isn't the answer. So I won't waste my time on a hopeless endeavor like that again."
Memory nodded. "Maybe I can help you more?"
Illusion jumped back to a defensive position. "How exactly do you plan to?"
"I promise I won't hurt you. I want to give back your memories." It would include the painful ones, like the one where Reality left the server. The memories that, despite their harshness, made Illusion understand he shouldn't push his limits or be so brash. "Maybe the memories will help you find what works and doesn't work with your mission."
"It might work actually. I only figured out the machine was a mistake by feeling the pain of failure. Maybe reliving the memories will be a better teacher than Time just showing me the past."
"I can return your memories, but it's a power I barely control. Instead of returning memories one-by-one or selectively, I return all memories at once. If I know someone and return their memories back, I'll lose my own memories of that person. I know I'm the last person you want to see, but I do have a favor to ask."
"Why do you think I can help you? Analyzing my memories would benefit Galaxy, but letting you keep yours doesn't benefit him." Naturally, Illusion didn't judge or question the drawbacks, and Memory was hoping on that.
"If you don't want to assist me, that's fine. I just ask you to reconsider your assumptions about me while you analyze. If you decide my company will benefit Galaxy, could you use your filter ability to allow me to keep my memories? You'll have the chance to, because I'll be delivering the memories slowly, doing my best to overcome my drawback."
The shield broke apart, turning back into a swarm of puzzle pieces. Illusion grabbed one piece and gripped it tight. "Fine. Well, what are you waiting for?"
Memory summoned the red zinnia. "Slowly and gradually," he said aloud, hoping the universe and luck would be on his side if they heard him. His heart raced. The zinnia floated up; the small weight lifting off his hands made him feel like he was spiraling in the air.
The flower unraveled. Its hundreds of petals broke off and formed into tinier flowers. Memory commanded some of them to glide towards Illusion. Standing still, his mouth agape, Illusion let his gaze follow the flowers floating towards him. Some of the flowers fizzled into tiny sparks once they got to close to him.
"Ah!" Memory hissed. For a moment, he blanked out and didn't know what he was doing. He forgot why he was commanding the flowers to go closer to Illusion.
As the zinnia unraveled more, Memory saw tiny gray flowers in his peripheral vision. Dread spiked as he saw the gray flowers accompany the departing red ones, slowly dissolving as they flew further away. No, he realized. My memories are leaving.
"Slowly -and-gradually, slowly-and-gradually," he chanted. He didn't know the situation, but he knew he had to deliver these memories as slowly as possible. Like he was staling, waiting for an intervention to stop an inevitable tragedy. "Slowly-and-gradually." He gasped when the big zinnia nearly collapsed, but with sudden adrenaline, he re-stabilized it, only allowing it to depetal itself a few times per second.
What was he even doing? The longer he persisted, the more scattered his mind felt. Despite the confusion, one clear thought surfaced through it: the mental image of Time saying he believed in him. With it came the comfort that no matter would happen, Time and the backup machine would be there for him to make sense of the world. Memory refocused on the large zinnia that he was actually controlling. Knowing he was actually controlling his drawback, and the comfort of the backup machine, ignited a tiny spark in him. He did a rare thing and trusted his gut, which told him to keep going.
More flowers headed towards Illusion and disappeared. Illusion was now staring at the ground, deep in thought. Eventually, he brought his hand up. With a turn of his hand, the puzzle pieces in front of him transformed into a net. The red flowers seeped through, but the gray flowers got caught and bounced off the net, returning to Memory.
Memory flinched when the gray flowers touched his skin. His focus sharpened, and his purpose, his goal, rang loud and clear. It should have been obvious: he was trying to restore Illusion's memories and keep his own while doing it.
He spared a glance at the panel in the sky. In the panel, Illusion stopped attacking the machine, pondering instead. Time relaxed, but still had his arms spread and ready to use more power. Memory beamed, wondering what Time would think about his accomplishment.
"GAH!" Illusion jumped in the panel and raised his hand again, alarming Time.
Memory jerked his focus back to the Illusion in front of him, who was also becoming antsy. He delivered more memories and Illusion relaxed. As Illusion maintained the filter, the path underneath him rejuvenated. Red zinnias spouted and bloomed sparsely along the path. Illusion kept his gaze low, but there was a new tense expression on his face.
Memory worried. He was returning the memories at the same pace, so why was Illusion acting like this? "What do you remember?"
Illusion bit back a hiss, not looking up. "My past...as Reality Steve...disconnecting..." More red zinnias sprouted at his feet. "It's all true, isn't it?" He shot his gaze up, eyes wide. "M-Memory?!"
"Illusion?!"
"No, no, no." Illusion dug into his hair. "I already feel him. If I remember our friendship, that'll go against what I stand for! Ah!" A burst of pink aura threw Memory off-balance and dissolved the pink net.
Memory got up and stared in horror. "This has to do with Galaxy Steve, doesn't it?!"
Illusion nodded, still clenching his head. "I already said I can't imagine being friends with you because Galaxy can't either. It was easier to be friends back when Galaxy was clueless. But now that he knows you're back, everything's changed."
Memory darted his gaze to the panel, which showed Illusion blasting more power at the machine. With that grunt, it was clear he didn't want to do it. Time hovered in the air and yelled, "Reverse!" and the machine shuddered. Time snapped his fingers and pocket watches spawned around him. He grabbed one watch and attached it to the cage. It worked for a moment before it glitched and exploded.
Memory looked back at the mindscape Illusion, trying to conceal the fear in his eyes. "No one can control what Galaxy thinks of me, but you can control your strength. Focus on keeping yourself together for your sake! Do you want to keep filtering through my memories?"
Illusion looked up. Memory had never seen him so anguished before. "I don't think I can. I can only think about how much it's breaking my mind that I'm going against him."
Memory sighed. "It's ok if you can't."
"No!" Illusion stiffened. "I want to try. I want to remember you, but what if my lack of free will – "
"If you want to try, then try!" Memory encouraged. "It's ok if it doesn't work, but we should at least try."
Illusion gulped. "Yeah...try..." He raised his hand and the pink net returned.
Memory breathed and refocused. It had strained his mind to keep these memories moving while they talked. He tried moving them faster, now that he knew Illusion wanted to filter them. He worried Illusion wouldn't filter them all instantly, so he didn't risk it. Slowly-and-gradually. Slowly-and-gradually. More gray flowers passed his vision, but soon they bounced off the net glided back to him, and the strain in his mind lessened.
Illusion winced as he maintained the net. "It really hurts to do this! I don't think I can... ah!"
The entire place shook. Memory panicked and fumbled to regain control over the flowers. Illusion crouched down, trembling. The net morphed into a storm of puzzle pieces and then into a cube enclosing him.
Memory raced to the cube. The flowers phased through, but Memory couldn't reach Illusion, only able to bang his fist against the wall. He tried to block the gray flowers with his hands, but they passed through him and the cube.
In the panel, the Illusion in the physical world continued destabilizing the machine. Time kept reversing the destruction with his pocket watches. "Enough of this!" Illusion shot pink chains at Time.
Time, who was focusing on stabilizing the watches, looked up and froze in alarm. The chains slammed into him and knocked him off the machine. The chains wrapped around him like living rope before disappearing. Time stumbled up and all the surrounding watches fell and vanished with a poof. Time aimed his hand at Illusion, but the thunder in the room dimmed. He paled and stared at his hands. "My powers are blocked..."
Memory looked back at the mindscape Illusion. "Illusion, how can I help?!" He pleaded.
"You can't help with this," Illusion murmured. The puzzle pieces gathered and formed a replica of the backup machine behind Illusion. "I cherish our moments together, but I also know our moments led to you doing awful things. My mind is locked, and I can't fight it anymore. I have to do things my way. Galaxy Steve's way."
Illusion turned and aimed his head at the duplicate machine. In the panel, Illusion also pointed at the backup machine. Everything lit up as Illusion's powers finally embraced having no obstacles.
"NO!" Memory cried.
The machine – both in the physical world and the duplicate in the mindscape – shuddered and roared. Thunder cackled as the pillars of the machine flared like heated iron, pink sparks bleeding out of the cracks crossing across the pillars. The hot white fragments chipped off, and soon, the machine collapsed on itself, the rumble of the damage being louder than the thunder.
The mindscape Illusion collapsed to his knees. "You lost...I'm sorry." His eyes fluttered and he passed out. The panel in the sky faded to black and vanished.
All the flowers – red and gray – flinched, as if they realized the situation and dove towards Illusion.
"Ah!" Pain ran through Memory's head and he suddenly felt dizzy. He tried to breathe and regain his focus. He rescanned his surroundings, and he felt cold when he saw more gray flowers in the air.
He flung his hands. "Stop!" The red and gray flowers slowed into a halt, but trembled, trying to inch closer to Illusion. Memory heaved a breath. Slowly delivering these memories was a toll, but freezing them in place put an unbelievable strain on him. He tried moving them closer to him, like how he commanded flowers in the Memory Dimension, but they wouldn't budge in the air.
He desperately searched for the panel, but it was nowhere. He badly hoped he could see Time stand up and fix everything. But he couldn't deny what he sensed and saw: Time's power had been blocked, and there was no way he could reverse the destruction of the machine.
If I fail, there's no backup machine to rescue me. It'll be over. It's already over.
Memory looked back at the flowers, his breath racing even more. He formed the clock mask and whispered, "Reverse," more like a beg than a command. He couldn't leave like this, in the middle of restoring memories and barely able to control the memories. He had to undo this reckless endeavor he was foolish enough to try. He had to get out of Illusion's mind to restore the backup machine since Time couldn't.
However, the moment he uttered that command, the flowers trembled. Instead of floating back to him, they shrank, the glow in their petals fading. Memory gasped. He was reversing the creation of the memories, not the transfer of them! "No, stop!" The arrows of his clock mask swung madly, one going forward and the other going the opposite way. The flowers nearly reduced to buds before he froze them. He panted heavily, his heart hammering.
"Forward." The buds grew back to flowers. Memory froze them back to their original state, which still strained him. What could he do now? He couldn't reverse this process. He didn't want to risk it again.
Memory's arms ached. His clock mask despawned and he dipped his head down, the tears starting to run. No matter how hard I try, I can never be good enough. I'm going to fail.
He only had two options: stay in Illusion's mind forever until he exhausted himself or someone rescued him, or willingly give all these unfiltered memories to Illusion, so at least one person is guaranteed to hold them.
"Ugh," Illusion groaned. Memory held his breath as Illusion squirmed but didn't wake up. His fingers twitched and he mumbled, "Need to do more..." He looked exhausted. Even if he miraculously woke up, Memory knew Illusion wouldn't be in the mental state to help him.
Memory sighed, the tears blurring his vision. He remembered what Illusion called this moment before he passed out: a loss.
It wasn't a loss. A true loss would be refusing to save Illusion. He would regret losing his confidence and messing up. He would regret the fact he never mastered his powers. But he would never regret caring for the person he loved the most.
Memory blinked his eyes clear and stepped forward. He passed the flowers and sat next to Illusion, brushing the azure hair out of his face. He was relieved that Illusion seemed more peaceful. Without losing control over the flowers, Memory carefully picked up Illusion. "You'll be okay," he soothed. "Please don't forget about me."
The silent tears fell heavier. He sniffed and hugged Illusion tight.
"Thank you for letting me be a good memory."
He was scared. He didn't want to say goodbye, even though it was him who was going to be lost this time. At least he could spend this last moment knowing he did the right thing. Knowing he turned over a new leaf because of Illusion.
Memory set the young Steve back down and channeled his powers, once more gaining the little control he had of the memories. The flowers surrounded the cousins and gently streamed into Illusion's head. Illusion's closed eyes twitched. Memory knew he was registering all the emotions he was currently reliving. Confusion, anger, ambition, apathy, thrill, fear, and joy. Joy from his times with Memory.
Memory smiled. He wouldn't regret this, and he did his best to capture this moment into his mind. His determination to achieve the impossible could never die if it was for Illusion.
Memory cleared his throat. "But even after you're free, and Sabre, Void, and Galaxy are no longer a concern for this world, you'll have to deal with new chaos...without me."
"What are you talking about?! What's going to h̴̭̒a̶͉̾ṕ̴̠p̸͒ͅȅ̵̝n̴̹͘ ̶̨̓n̶̰̎e̵̩̅x̴̺͗t̴̗͛?̵̺̓"̴̩̆
"...To bring back Void, I must restore his memories, which will teach him how to break free from Galaxy's mind. And since I have those memories in my possession, I will forget about my own father when I restore his memories..."
[̷̮̗̮̟̌̋͒ẁ̷̙̱h̸̼̤̬̊̄͜ö̵̳̼̤̻́̏̽?̵̠͔͒̂̑͠]̴̠̍͠ gulped. "Because of all your drawbacks..."
Memory nodded. "So...please don't find me once I finish this mission. I don't know what'll happen to me when I forget about the most important person in my life. Will I become like Elemental...or someone worse? I just...don't want you to see the person I'll ẗ̴̡͘u̷̫̽ȑ̷̡̳̐n̷̡͙͊̈́ ̶͙̉̀i̶͇͛́n̷͙̙͒t̵̛̞͕̂o̷̙̎̃ ̴̡̼͝ – "
Memory gasped, his mind and his purpose falling out of sync. What was he doing? He felt power streaming through his hands. He huffed and willed himself to continue sending these memories, even though he had no clue why it was so important. He had to do it.
Zinnias bloomed around him, blinding him with their glow. He winced, but he felt someone nearby when he brushed his arm around.
He felt around for that person. Where even was he? He traced through his recent memories, but he could barely form anything tangible.
In the back of his mind, he heard a sentence. No, an echo. "Thank you for letting me be a good memory."
What did those words mean?
Were they important?
The flashing lights hushed, leaving his mind and skin desperate for senses. He opened his eyes, seeing the dim surroundings and the silhouette of a person. He reached out, but at his touch, the figure dispersed into gray flowers that melted into the darkness.
The ground vanished. Mission complete, a faint thought surfaced.
And Memory teleported away from this confusing place.
Word count: 6115
I want to let you guys know that in the rough draft of this chapter, I used the word "disappear" 12 times. In my struggle to decrease the redundancy of "disappear," I became so close to start using "evanesce" as a replacement verb, even though that word is too powerful for me to handle. Glad I managed to replace most of the "disappear" words in the end.