Author's Note: Thank you so much for coming back to read! This story is so much fun to write and it will get a little more exciting as time goes on, but right now I am focussing on the family taking care of Maria because I think it is so sweet. Your response to the first chapter was so lovely and I am so appreciative. Happy reading!
He smiled at the creak of the staircase and took the cup of tea he just made from the counter before turning to see Maria making her way down. It was nearly 10:00, much later than she usually woke, but she must have needed the extra time this morning. He walked over to her when she reached the foot of the stairs and pushed the cup of tea into her hand, resting his own on the back of her neck when she thanked him quietly and brushing his lips against her forehead. "I want you to take it easy today," He told her when he pulled back again. "Your duties are going to be seen to by the children for the moment, so no need to worry about that. You could read or go for a little walk."
She looked at him over the rim of her cup as she took a sip of tea. "I know you and the children want to help and I love you all for caring so much, but there's no need for any of you – especially them – to do extra work just for me. If I were ill and physically unable to do it then maybe I would be a bit more agreeable, but that's not the case. I have responsibilities, not only on the farm but as a wife and mother also, and it would be wrong and…and highly unfair of me to expect all of you to take care of those things for me when you already have enough to get on with. It'll take me a while to get past all this, I shan't stand here and try to deny that, but I can manage, I promise you."
"I never doubted that," He soothed, shaking his head as he took a step closer to her and brought his hands to rest on her waist through her dress, drawing her close to him. "I have no need for you to tell me that you can manage because I'm well aware of that fact. You are the strongest woman I know and you make me so proud, but this isn't about whether or not I think you have what it takes to get on with your work around here. You are exhausted, not only physically but mentally as well, I can see it in your eyes. I could turn a blind eye to that and let you work all day, but that wouldn't do you any favours. I want you to let me take care of you and do my job as your husband."
For a moment, she stood there in silence before she gave him a small nod of agreement.
"All right," She whispered. "I guess a few days won't hurt."
"I'm only doing this because I love you and I worry, you do understand that?" He raised an eyebrow at her.
Resting a hand on the side of his neck, she went onto her tiptoes and brushed three tender kisses against his lips. Her lips clung to his for a moment as she began to pull away, her thumb running over the stubble on his jaw, and when the kiss eventually broke she returned to her usual height. "Does that answer your question?" She asked him.
"You know, I'm not sure. I may need more convincing." He teased, touching the back of his hand to her cheek.
"Behave, Captain."
"Yes, Fräulein."
She smiled at their light banter and had another sip of tea. "Do you think we could…"
He ran a hand warmly along her back when she paused and shook her head. "Do I think we could what, darling?"
"Go on a hack together later on? It might help get my mind off things, you never know." She said with a shrug.
"Of course, that sounds like a grand idea," He nodded. "How about this evening? It should be a little cooler then."
"Liesl and Friedrich won't mind watching the others for us for a couple of hours, will they?"
"No, I shouldn't think so. I'll speak to them about it later when I go and see how they're getting on."
"Okay." She hummed.
"How about we make the most of this unusual peace and quiet and go and sit in there for a while?" He suggested.
"I think that might be one of the best ideas you've ever had." She chuckled softly.
He took his arms from around her then and slid his hand into her own so he could lead her into the sitting room, his thumb caressing the back of her palm as they walked towards his armchair before he sat down and let her ease herself into his lap. He put his arms around her when she curled up there and leaned against his chest, kissing her head and sighing into her hair as he ran a hand along her back in a soothing manner. "You do know this changes nothing, don't you? Our being unable to have a child? I know it was something we talked about a lot in Paris and even more so last year, but it not happening for us does not mean I love you any less and I hope you realize that."
"I do," She tilted her head back to look at him. "Of course, I do, but I can't help but feel as though I failed at the same time. I never got the chance to have such talks with my mother since I was so young when she passed and it would have been inappropriate, I suppose, but when I lived with my uncle he would tell me that childbearing was the only thing I would ever be good for. He would tell me it was the only reason anyone would want to marry me. I had found a way to not let what he said get to me that point – I mean, I was sixteen and he'd been treating me like that for so long – but the childbearing part stuck with me. I was certain it was one thing I would be good at."
"Maria, my love, you can't look at this in such a way. Your inability to bear a child is anatomical." He pointed out.
"I know that, but I spent over a decade with my uncle and he made me feel like a complete failure every day I was there," She told him. "Even when I was doing something right, exactly as he showed me, and he was well aware of it, he would scream at me and make me start again. He called me every name under the sun, some I don't wish to repeat. I don't expect you to understand, not when your upbringing was nothing like mine, but you look hard for something that you could be good at when you're made to feel an idiot and as though you're good for nothing for so long. Childbearing was mine, but that's not going to happen for me anymore for obvious reasons, so I feel lost."
"I have no idea how you can sit there and say you're good at nothing when you are an exceptional mother to our children," He said in a gentle voice, shaking his head at her in disbelief. "You may not have birthed them, but that makes you even more incredible in my opinion because you took them on and you don't love them a fraction less than you would one of our own. Not only are you an exceptional mother, but you are also the most amazing wife. I know I can be a pain to live with at times, but you put up with me and you have no idea how much I appreciate your support. I still don't know what I did to be deemed worthy of you, but I would do it again if it were needed."
Her chest tightened and tears came to her eyes as she leaned forward in his lap to set her cup down on the table, a shaky sigh leaving her as she cuddled against him again and curled a hand into his shirt. "I haven't any idea what I would do without you, I mean that," She told him, reaching up to stroke the greying hairs at his temple while he pulled her a little closer to him. "You always seem to know exactly what I need to hear and I love that about you."
"Well, I learned from the best." He placed a kiss on her brow and smiled against her skin.
"We're going to be all right, aren't we?" She ran her hand along his chest, looking into his eyes again.
"We are, sweetheart," He assured her. "You and I are going to be absolutely fine…"
"Nicholas? What are you doing here?"
At the sound of crunching gravel, Liesl set down the bucket in her hand and wiped her hands on the front of her overalls before leaving the stables and making her way over to where he was standing. She smiled when he reached for her waist, pulling her close to him, and her hands found his chest when he lowered his head to kiss her while wrapping her in his arms. It was a quick kiss, soft and chaste, but they were still smiling like fools when it ended. "I thought we made arrangements to go out for lunch," He told her. "Unless I'm wrong and it was next Saturday."
Her face fell as she suddenly remembered planning their lunch date. "Oh, I'm such an idiot, I completely forgot."
"Not to worry, we can always reschedule," He shook his head. "Is everything all right? You seem done in, darling."
She ran her hands tenderly along his arms when a lump came to her throat and lost his gaze for a second, staring at a piece of lint on his shirt that she quickly removed. "Mother had an appointment with her doctor yesterday and she and Father were given some bad news," She told him in a quiet voice, looking at him again when he tightened his hold of her. "Her doctor said there's no baby and there never was one to begin with. Her desire for one and all the miscarriages she had last year had such an impact on her that her mind and body tricked her into thinking she was pregnant. Pseudocyesis is the name of the condition and it can't really be treated. She just has to cope with it."
"Oh, I'm so sorry," He sighed. "Your parents have been through so much this past year, they don't deserve this."
"No, they don't, you're right," She agreed while reaching up to palm away the tear that rolled down her cheek. "I wanted to do something to help, so I thought that the others and I could take on some of her jobs around here for the time being so she can get her head around all this. I never meant to forget about our lunch date, but I was just so set on getting my work done that it truly slipped my mind. I could always make us a little something to eat as soon as I'm done with this though, what do you say? Then we won't have to miss out on that nice lunch entirely."
Smiling, he took his arms from around her waist and cupped her face in his hands beneath the curtain of her hair. "I have a better idea. If we do this together then it'll take half the time and then we can go inside and I can make us something to eat," He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs while looking into her eyes, reveling in the sparkle he could see in them. "You want to help your parents, I completely understand that and I love you for how caring you are, but you're only going to wear yourself out and make yourself sick if you try to do everything. You need to take care of your own needs as well as theirs, my sweet, because how else are you going to manage to do all that?"
"I love you." She took a step closer to him so their chests were touching.
"I love you too," He told her before kissing her once more. "Come on, the sooner we start the sooner we can eat."
She moved away from him then and the two of them started walking in the direction of the stables, but she found she couldn't help but smirk as she glanced over her shoulder at him. "It really is no wonder that you and Kurt get along so well," She chuckled gently, allowing him to take her hand. "Your bellies are all either of you think about."
"Charming. You know, you're lucky I feel the way I do about you or you wouldn't get away with that."
"I am lucky. Very lucky indeed…"
Setting her pumps down next to her on the bank, Maria leaned back on her hands and sighed as she dipped both feet into the brook. It had been a good idea, coming out on a hack with her husband. It was rare they were able to do things without their children now their circumstances had changed, but they always had a wonderful time when the opportunity to do so arose and today was no exception. It was a familiar route they took, one that led them to 'their spot', a little clearing not too far from the farm, and it was just as gorgeous and peaceful as she remembered. She loved coming here with him. It gave them time to be alone and focus entirely on one another for a little while.
She glanced over her shoulder when he cleared his throat and smiled as she watched him make his way down the bank to where she was sitting, having already secured both the horses to a nearby tree. When he sat down next to her, he slipped an arm warmly around her and kissed her on the forehead and she all but melted into his embrace. "I think this is the most relaxed you've been since you woke up this morning," She heard him mumble against her skin before she pulled away a little to look him in the eye and sighed when he gave her cheek a stroke. "I know it would be a ridiculous question to ask if you're feeling better, but how do you feel now compared to this morning?"
"Well, my head is a little clearer," She admitted. "I think I'm starting to realize that no one was at fault for this."
"Including yourself, darling?"
"Including myself, yes."
"Good," He slid closer to her and gave her a squeeze. "I never want you blaming yourself for something like this."
She was silent for a moment as she looked across the brook. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Of course, you can ask me anything." He nodded.
"I need you to be completely honest with me. Promise me?" She turned to him with a raise of an eyebrow.
"Complete honesty, I promise." He assured him.
"Are you really okay with me wanting to stop trying for a baby? Or did you just say you were for me?" She asked.
He took a moment to think about his response before taking his arm from around her and running his hand along her back. "I admit that you telling me you wanted to stop came as a bit of a surprise, but I never once lied to you about my true feelings on the matter," He told her. "I had to watch you put yourself back together after every one of those miscarriages and it was torture for me. I remember it got to the point where you refused to let yourself be delighted when you found out you were pregnant because you knew how it was going to end. In those moments, I wanted to stop also. I was sick and tired of you getting hurt all the time because you were deserving of none of it."
Her bottom lip trembled but she succeeded in holding back her tears. "It's a cruel world we live in, isn't it?"
"Yes, it is," He buried his nose in her hair when she went back to looking across the brook, his hand palming little circles onto her back as he breathed her in. "If there was anything I could do to change things, not only right now but in the past too, then I would and I hope you know that. You never should have been made to endure all that you did when you were growing up, no one should, and as for all you've been made to endure in recent years, I…"
"I know," She soothed, bringing a hand to his chest and turning her head in his direction so he had no choice but to look at her. "I know how much you want to change the past for me, but there's not a person living that has the power to do such a thing. Something you need to realize though is that you do something far greater than that for me. You take the time to help me through these things. Instead of removing the problem completely and making it non-existent, you help me to deal with it and I have never had anyone – well, aside from the Reverend Mother, I suppose – care about me enough to be that patient. You take such wonderful care of me and I adore you for that."
Her words succeeded in putting a smile on his face and he couldn't resist leaning in to kiss her gently on the lips. "I think the children did a wonderful job of things today," He said as he put his arm back around her and pulled her close. "I checked on them a couple of times and they were all doing well, but I have to admit that I think Liesl worked the hardest. Nicholas had to physically make her sit down before we left because she was going to go back out and sort the animals for the night. I told her I would see to it when we get back so she has no need to worry."
"I have noticed such a change in her since we moved here," She shook her head. "She seems so much more grown up and she's far more responsible now than she was back in Austria. I think Nicholas and his influence has quite a lot to do with that, but I also think she's truly becoming a woman now and a wonderful one at that. She sets such an incredible example for the younger girls and I know they look up to her far more than they want us to believe."
"She does. I have to be honest, I thought it would take forever for her to get past what Rolfe put her through, but she surprised me," He confessed. "I know she found it hard in the beginning and I know she acted out a little, but that was to be expected and she managed to get past it in time. I hate him for hurting her and I could have killed him that night, but I also think he did her a favour because he made her start to think more carefully about what she really wanted in a potential suitor. She was so much more cautious in the months following and I doubt I have to remind you of how long she made Nicholas wait before she eventually agreed to go on that first date with him."
She chuckled at that. "I think the way he stuck it out really proved to you how serious he was about her though."
"Oh, certainly it did," He agreed. "I admit that I was against him pursuing her in the beginning, not only because of what happened with Rolfe but also his age. I know there isn't much of a gap, but I was still somewhat sceptical about what it was that he wanted with her. I think it was how patient and respectful he was towards her that really changed my opinion though. If he was simply looking to take advantage and court her until he got bored then he no doubt would have given up in time. It's the fact that he stayed and continued to try and prove his feelings for her that made me see he was a good man. I knew I could trust him and that he wasn't going to mess her around."
"I think this is the happiest I have ever seen her and it makes me glad." She smiled.
Reaching up, he brushed her hair from her face and stroked her cheek with his thumb when she looked up at him. "You're part of the reason for that," He pointed out. "You made her see that she needed to stop thinking so much about who she was going to end up with and let it happen in its own time. She spent so much time searching for someone that she was letting opportunities simply pass her by, but you showed her she had to be patient and she took that on board and so much has happened for her. She started doing things for herself and I think that made her happier too. You understand our children in a way I will never comprehend, you always have, and I love that."
"I know they aren't mine, but I couldn't love them more." She admitted gently.
"Maria, my darling, they are yours. You may not have carried and given birth to them, but you're still their mother and they're still your children," He reminded her. "You're also the only mother Marta and Gretl have ever known."
She gave him a silent nod. "I'm so grateful to you, you know."
"I know," He assured her. "And, believe me, I am just as grateful to you. For everything."
Sat on the sofa in the sitting room, running a hand slowly through Liesl's hair while she slept with her head in his lap, Nicholas looked up from her at sensing they were no longer alone and saw her father standing in the entrance of the room. "I realize I'm outstaying my welcome and I apologize for that, sir," He whispered. "I'll be gone soon."
"Stay a while," Georg shook his head. "She worked hard today, she needs her sleep."
Nicholas nodded and smoothed a hand over her hair before leaning further back into the cushion when Georg sat down across from him in his armchair. "I, uh, I'm not entirely certain it's my place to bring it up, but she told me about Maria and what happened yesterday and I just wanted to let you know that I am terribly sorry about it," He told him. "I doubt there's much I can do, but if you think of anything then please don't hesitate to give me a call."
"I appreciate that, thank you. At the moment, I'm just trying to make things a little easier for her." Georg replied.
"I get that. How is she?"
"Exhausted. I sent her to bed when we got back, so I'm hoping she's asleep. I'll go up and look in on her soon."
Nicholas hummed in acknowledgment. "I want to thank you for allowing me to stay for dinner tonight."
"You earned it. It was good of you to stay and help the children out, they appreciated it." Georg said with a smile.
"There's actually something I've been meaning to talk to you about, but…but it can wait." Nicolas assured him.
"No, if you have something to say then say it. You might as well." Georg shrugged.
Looking at him in silence for a second, Nicholas took a deep breath before clearing his throat and straightening up a little. "I love your daughter, Captain von Trapp. She is an incredible woman and she means a great deal to me. I know she and I are still young – her more than me, granted – so I completely understand if you want to hold off, but I was wondering – uh, hoping – that you might give me your permission to ask her to marry me. I do plan to wait until she leaves school, until her studies are behind her so it doesn't interfere with her studies, but I thought I would ask for your permission now because I have been thinking about this for quite some time now. I'm serious."
Georg blinked at him. "I have to admit, that wasn't at all what I thought you were going to say."
"I shouldn't have asked it of you, not with things the way they are at the minute," Nicholas sighed. "I apologize."
"It wasn't what I thought you were going to say," Georg repeated himself. "But I have been wondering if you were going to bring it up. Maria and I know how you feel about Liesl. We know how she feels about you. You've never given us any reason not to trust you and to say you're respectful towards the two of us and towards her would be an understatement. Now, I don't want you to take that as my blessing. I have got quite a few things I want to ask you and be certain of before I decide and I will need some time to talk about it with Maria and think things over."
Nicholas nodded. "Of course."
"Well, I need to be certain that she's going to be supported. How do you intend to do that?" Georg asked.
"My mother always stressed the importance of putting money aside for when I need it. From a young age, she told me to save any money I received during the holidays or on my birthday and I did as she requested," Nicholas told him. "When I left school, I went straight into work and any money that came in from jobs I did was also put into savings. I have quite a substantial amount now, enough for a home of my own at least, and I recently applied for a job at a reputable car dealership that would provide me with a steady income. If I'm not picked, I'll keep trying."
"Mmm," Georg nodded. "Liesl is quite serious about wanting a family. Have you thought much about that?"
Nicholas glanced down at her before looking him in the eye again. "She and I have had a number of conversations about that and I think we're on the same page where children are concerned. We want them, but we would like to travel and make the most of the time we have together before we take that step and start putting plans into place. I want what she wants though, honestly, so if she turns around and says she wants to start a family earlier than we initially planned then I'm going to support her fully with that. She's the one who'll be doing most of it, of course."
"I'm glad to hear that," Georg replied. "As I said, I need some time to think about this in more depth and to have a talk with Maria about it to make sure she and I are on the same page, but you shouldn't have to wait that long."
"I appreciate that." Nicholas replied.
"If you don't mind, I think I might go up and check on her. Just to make sure she's okay."
"No, no, of course. I should be going anyway, so I'll wake Liesl and take my leave so that you can head to bed."
"Right," Georg rose from his armchair. "Goodnight, Nicholas."
"Goodnight, Captain." Nicolas echoed.
Georg wasted no time in turning on his heel and leaving the sitting room, a smile playing at his lips as he thought back to the conversation the two of them had just had. He already knew his wife would be delighted when he told her the news. She had such a soft spot for the boy, it was almost as though he were another one of their sons, and she had told him on a number of occasions that she couldn't imagine their daughter with anyone else at this point.
He already knew they were going to be on the exact same page where this matter was concerned.
Heading upstairs, he straightened his jacket as he turned the corner and walked down the hallway that led to their bedroom. It was silent, the upper level, the children having retired to bed quite some time ago now on account of how worn out their long day had rendered them, and he hoped that also meant that Maria was long asleep as well.
His hopes were dashed the second he entered the bedroom.
Rather than being snuggled down beneath the quilt, peacefully asleep, she was sat in the armchair near the window and there was no denying she had been in tears not too long ago. Her breathing sounded uneven, she was shaking, her eyes were puffy and the light from the moon only made the tears on her cheeks that little bit more prominent.
He shut the door quietly behind him, his gaze never abandoning her, and pushed his hands into his jacket pockets as he began to slowly cross the room. She went on looking out of the window and he was uncertain as to whether it was because she was in her own little world or whether she couldn't bring herself to look at him. When he knelt down before her, however, she turned her head and it was then that he saw that her eyes had lost the tiny sparkle that had returned in them during their hack. It was just as he feared. She had gone right back to square one again. "Darling, what is it? What's happened?" He asked her softly as he laid a hand on her knee through her nightgown.
"I thought I got rid of them all," She reached into the space between her and the arm of the chair and pulled out a tiny cardigan, showing it to him for just a second before she launched it across the room. "How could I miss one?"
"You should have come and found me. You shouldn't have sat up here alone like this." He sighed.
"Oh, so this is my fault." She grumbled, rolling her eyes at him as she turned to look out of the window again.
"What?" He frowned. "I…that isn't what I meant nor what I said, Maria, I only…"
She turned back to him and ran a hand over his hair and he stopped talking. "No, I know. I'm sorry, Georg."
Catching her hand in his when she drew it back, he kissed the back of her palm before allowing his thumb to run across her knuckles. "Your body needs sleep. You're going to end up sick, sweetheart, and I really don't want that."
She shook her head in response, sucking on her bottom lip. "Could you maybe hold me for a while instead?"
"Come here," He got to his feet and held his hands out to her before she slipped her own into them and he aided her in standing, the two of them looking at each other for a second before he moved to take her place in the chair and she climbed into his lap. She curled up into a ball, almost as though she were trying to make herself invisible, and buried her face in his chest while he encircled her in his arms. "Just tell me what to do and I'll do it, Maria…"
"Stay," She said into his shirt. "Honestly, the best thing you can do for me right now is just stay here."
"I can do that," He soothed. "No matter how long we have to sit here, I'm not going to leave your side."
"Promise?"
"Promise," He echoed. I promise…"
Author's Note: Thank you so much for taking the time to read this chapter. It took a while to get done, but I am so pleased to have completed it and I am super excited about Liesl and Nicholas because it brings a small shred of happiness to this dark time for Maria and Georg. I really can't wait to see what you all thought of it, so please drop me a review to let me know and I will see you all soon.
P.S: Just in case anyone wonders, Liesl is 18 (only a couple of months away from turning 19) in this storyline and Nicholas is almost 22.
